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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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10562252 No.10562252 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Witty quote thread?

A priest, standing by Voltaire's death bed: "Please! Use the precious few moments you have left! Renounce Satan!"

Voltaire: "Now, now, my good man, this is no time for making enemies."

>> No.10562307

"Hey, fellas! How about this for a headline for tomorrow's paper? 'French Fries.'"
-James French as he was being strapped into the electric chair.

>> No.10562330

"..."

-Squall Leonhart

>> No.10562335

>>10562252
Everything on the dude that's not dead.
No, wait, they are BOTH dead.

>> No.10562354

>>10562307
>>10562252
This thread brought to you by Cracked.com

>> No.10562361

"Well ma'am, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you aren't. Are you?"
-Marine General on whether school children shooting at the range would equip them for violence.

>> No.10562378

>>10562252
>"Renounce Satan!

I read that as "Renounce Stalin!" and realised that would be far funnier, even if a few years too early.

>> No.10562390

"Don't touch my stuff. I'll be back for it."
My grandfather last words

>> No.10562413

Just about anything said by Patton.

>> No.10562433

"Surely you can't be serious!"

"I am serious. And don't call me Shirley."

>> No.10562452

"I picked the wrong week to stop smoking/drinking/doing cocaine."
-Airplane!

>> No.10562467

>>10562378

About 144 years too early.

>> No.10562475

"It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man."
- Scott Elledge, on his retirement as a Professor at Cornell

"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian."
- Dennis Wholey (1937-)

>> No.10562533
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10562533

"Quantity has a quality all its own."
"One death is a tragedy; one million is a statistic."

-both by Stalin

Pic seemed appropriate,

>> No.10562570

"Wit is educated insolence."
- Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)

>> No.10562605

"What I'm saying is, if God wanted to send us a message, and ancient writings were the only way he could think of doing it, he could have done a better job."

Carl Sagan

>> No.10562625

"Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo."
- H. G. Wells

>> No.10562683

"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and is widely regarded as a bad move."
- Douglas Adams (1952-2001)

>> No.10562716

"If you want to build a ship, don't herd people together to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea."
- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1900-1944)

>> No.10562720

>>10562683
Douglas Adams ;_;

He taught the world to fly in the most creative and rewarding method ever conceived.

>> No.10562790

>>10562720
I hope he is in the writer's equivalent of Valhalla now.

"In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they had brotherly love; they had five hundred years of democracy and peace and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock."
- Orson Welles

"When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail."
- Abraham Maslow

"Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by incompetence."
- Napoleon Bonaparte

>> No.10562843

>>10562790
He's sipping Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters with Lovecraft.

"Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose."

"Microsoft looks at new ideas, they don't evaluate whether the idea will move the industry forward, they ask, 'how will it help us sell more copies of Windows?'"
-Bill Gates

>> No.10562858
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10562858

>>10562330

>> No.10562868

>>10562790
Writer valhalla sounds awesome.

>> No.10562992

"A designer knows he has achieved perfection not when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

>> No.10563184

>>10562716
My god. this.

>>
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