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/tg/ - Traditional Games


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>> No.76889840 [View]
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>used to have giant toothy maw
>is supposed to be a predator among predators
>now has small mouth with giant chitinous protrusions obstructing his ability to bite into things
>predacious praetor "the voice of hunger" that has "vore" (to eat) in its name can now only eat things small enough to fit on a dinner plate

This rustles my jimmies so fucking hard.

>> No.72581565 [View]
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Reprint the Allied fastlands

>> No.56178093 [View]
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I hate this CYOA so much...

>> No.55693504 [View]
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>you give a long-winded and prepared narration of what is going on around them
>the voices they hear, the smells in the halls, the chill of the wind
>they are introduced to the first NPC (obligatory opening quest-giver) and say their part
>little touches here and their to show their personality, the weight of their experiences to this point, and hope the players will indulge and immerse themselves as well
>"....So that just brings it all back to you.....Why? Why are you here I wonder?"
>*gestures to player X*
>Player - "I tell him why I'm here."

Fuck any and all players who have never DMd a session in their lives and don't know the time and effor tthat your DM puts into the encounters/environment/world into making it enjoyable for you selfish CUNTS when you get to the table and eat all of my god damn butter rolls and drink all of my fucking tea!

>> No.55545938 [View]
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When you're right, you're right. Fuck you for being right.

>> No.55455891 [View]
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>Put hours into every day making the next session along with attending my classes and working
>Try to use their character names as much as possible, act out my NPCs differently in voice and decisions making as if I was (oh I don't know) PLAYING the ROLE of that that character
>Try to detail environments to the best of my ability through maps because my verbal descriptions often suck and I miss a few things but maps are usually of good quality
>Don't expect, or even want, a pat on the back/compliment on the session/or other shit like that just for players to meet me half-the god damn-way and not treat the session like a typical MMO
>Too bad
>they always go straight for the person with the imaginary (!) on their head, immediately go to where they were told to go, only to have half of them die, the rest barely complete/make it out alive, and then listen to them bitch and moan about how they couldn't have done it any differently
>never attempt to make a plan of attack
>never try to investigate/perceive the area/enemies around or near them
>preparing for a job/quest is seemingly alien to them and almost always only have what they started with or found in the last dungeon
>4/20 blaze it XDDDD
>play their characters as if it's a video game, almost never act as if they are playing a person that has lived their entire lives semi-competently up to the point in time they came into the campaign
>Try to make a story? They start making train noises.

About to run these tracks into a canyon, wash my hands of my group, and hopefully get play for once through an entire campaign without flakes or at least get a new group of players that actually attempt to immerse themselves into the world. I stopped having fun years ago because of them but still do it out of a sense of obligation at this point.

>> No.55272786 [View]
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>played multiple campaigns with group for years now
>usually forever DM but one player said he wants to try out GMing
>giddy as fuck since I never get to actually play and we've all wanted to do this setting for a long time
>"Oh and my wife is going to play with us as well."
>know most players irl, including new DM, and hate his wife (typical CN roflmao XDDDD harley quinn XL cosplay cunt)
>Gut feeling that tells me campaign is ending after first session
>session day has come
>typical "you wake up in a cell with x amount of people" start
>wife instantly starts to jovially taunt guards and attack fellow prisoners for not doing what she says (shit like rub my feet and "suck my clit, Bubba")
>usually would get a negative penalty or reaction for dude-broing, being an idiot, treating the session like a video game, etc. through future rolls having negative modifiers till you get into the role or more than likely getting your ass kicked but nothing happens to her
>rest of us are put off and start to do out-of-character things as well
>get instantly attacked, break bones through failed rolls, etc.
>high amounts of frustration are obvious from the rest of us as wife is getting nearly whatever she wants (low DC rolls, crit fails doing nothing when the rest of us are penalized for them, and enemies not attacking her though she is the closest, loudest, or in some cases the only one fucking visible)
>we start to not care about penalties and do whatever we want as long as we have heartbeats
>wife starts to tell us "you aren't playing your characters correctly"
>final straw
>during the prison escape we lock her in with the guards, tell them it was her idea, and wait for the DM to tell us what happens
>he doesn't
>he says that didn't happen and we say then this session is over
>afterwards we told him his wife can never play with the group again and I'm back to DMing

I just wanted to play for fucking ONCE.

>> No.54257398 [View]
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>> No.53882175 [View]
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Why is Eronomicon winning? We already have like five lewd magic cyoas.

>> No.52694523 [View]
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You didn't fucking read, did you?
You just saw a guy calling someone else a shitposter and leapt on them like a rabid duck.

>> No.52246319 [View]
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Here's you (you) you fuckface. I hope Caine decapitates you and absorbs all the blood from your shitty body through his godly Cainite cock as he fucks your neckholes.

>> No.49759963 [View]
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Barbarian Rage

>> No.48978592 [View]
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>> No.48107577 [View]
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So instead of giving us a REAL Skullgirls 2 they're giving us a shitty cashgrab phonetrash game with microtransactions. Consider me pissed off.

>> No.47973693 [View]
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>> No.47475481 [View]
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Portal Games is the publisher. They are publishing board games almost exclusively right now, forgetting about their RPG roots. They also published one other RPG - Monastyr.

And as I said, I think their leader - Ignacy Trzewiczek - said that in the current form the game can't be released in the US, because it uses some stereotypes that are reaaaaally frowned upon.

Pic related. Have you read the fan-books? Łowca and Ołów are very good.

>> No.46516912 [View]
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>Fulgrtim arrives near the end, crosses blades with the Khan, taunts him that as a Daemon he's so powerful he doesn't even need to fight anymore, and fucks off

jesus fucking christ of all the shit in the HH series this is one of the most obnoxious things of all - all the fucking primarch fights that end up being literally meaningless because no one's allowed to kill their opponent or even decisively win or lose because in the end canon has to play out the way it's already been set down. Yeah, Fulgrim got to kill Ferrus but Ferrus never really had a canon fate to begin with and was implied to have died on Istvaan anyway, so it was okay to have that added. Now there's just an endless list of fucking stalemates so the writers can keep padding this retarded shit out.

>> No.45746317 [View]
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>> No.42040660 [View]
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>1 hp left

>> No.41593577 [View]
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>Trying to come up with a name for a Slaanesh warband that eats gene-seed.
>Wanting to use the angel wings from those golden BA dudes.
>After a while, come to the conclusion that "Angels of Ecstasy" would be the best.
>Lexicanum already has an entry with that name.
>The entry only has two sentences and an ugly color scheme.

>> No.40790288 [View]
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>And yet...
I need a fucking drink.
Fuck, even captcha shares my need of drink.

>> No.40740757 [View]
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>mfw read it
How can anyone derive any pleasure from this?

All I feel is rage

>> No.40477948 [View]
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>They basically trend towards being attention whores, in my experience, hence why I tend to restrict access to Force Sensitivity in my EotE/AoR games to people who have demonstrated they aren't idiots.
I tended to find in my group at least, the force-whores tend to be a bit of a combination of 'LOOK AT ME, I'M SPESHUL' and some of the dumber ones that are probably clinically retarded.
Now, I don't give a damn if you've got a half decent idea for a character, or at least know what the fuck you're doing in the game. But when you combine the shit character with the shit player that has no fucking idea what they're doing in the game, what their powers do and mechanically how to use them... dragging shit out for fucking hours, upon hours looking up their shit.
I tend to get cranky.

So I started a F&D game, guess what, you're all loveable, nice Padawans!
>Speshul Player puts hand up


>> No.39657959 [View]
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