Parenting with /sci/

[Anonymous No.7218891]

So i've got a daughter.

I just want her to be happy, and I know that happiness for me has come from meeting the challenges presented by my field of study and work (I'm a chemist). I want the same happiness for her.

I'm worried that as she's growing she's going to get pressure to not challenge herself in her science and math classes. I don't want to lose this kid to apathy.

What can I do with her to help her be passionate about discovery through science and math but also understand the value of working hard when there's so much pressure on kids to be lazy fucks.

[Anonymous No.7218896]

Tell her you'll give her $1000 if she can build a functioning model hydroelectric generator

If I was 12 I'd be on that like a fat guy on pudding

[Anonymous No.7218899]

Have you asked her what, if anything, she wants to study?

[Anonymous No.7218909]

>>7218891
OP here, pshould have specified that she's 2. Mom out of the picture. I'm looking for plans or habits I can institute in the future.

I know this sounds declinist and hand-wringey, I'm just worried about the effect the world's going to have on her.

Any other parents on here?

[Anonymous No.7218908]

Start cooking meth with her.

[Anonymous No.7218933]

>>7218909
>Mom out of the picture.
did you kill her or something?

[Anonymous No.7218955]

>>7218933
nope she bailed. I've got custody.

[Anonymous No.7218976]

>>7218955
No TV, no computer.

Biggest distractions of a young child, later in life, task her to read 2 or more books a week and write about them, stoke the fire for learning.

[Anonymous No.7219027]

>>7218891
show her futuristic sci-fi movies of what could possibly be done in the near future with science and math

[Anonymous No.7219035]

>>7218891
All it really takes is that your daughter find the right group of people to associate with.

I speak as a sociology minor.

[Anonymous No.7219039]

>>7218891
www.christianchat.com SIGN UP AND START A CRUSADE!

We must launch a holy crusade against ISIS for the killing of innocent Christians! No longer will we be pushed around by extremists from the Muslim world. The heretics who attack Christians shall be killed so that they may burn in hell for all eternity! Brothers and sisters we need to set up a donation page for the founding of an order that protects Christians from the violent elements of muslim society!

[Anonymous No.7219042]

>>7218891
Read her this.

[Anonymous No.7219055]

>>7218909
Make her reads books, make her do exercises.

One thing I heard that is really important in parenting: Always be consequent, 100% of the time. When she does something good, reward her, when she does something bad, punish her.

I think I read this is the single most important thing in parenting, I think you can google it.

And also

R U D I N
U
D
I
N

[Anonymous No.7219058]

>>7218891

Move to a best school district around. Get the cheapest abode in the wealthiest neighborhood you can. Look for plenty of Asian and Indian families. These folks push there kids like crazy.

I speak from experience. Girls 7 and 3.5. My eldest in 1st grade is way beyond where I was at that age in math and reading. We push her, like all the other parents around here.

[Anonymous No.7219061]

>>7218976

don't let her read young adult fiction novels though

how the hell did the dad get custody anyway

[Anonymous No.7219071]

For fucks sake man, don't coddle your daughter. There's nothing more than annoying that having to follow what your parents told you to do.

If you want to help, do this: establish an open, objective, scientific environment in which she is allowed, but where she isn't forced in to. Most of the world is already moving away from religion, and that enough should position our next generation the right way.

The best thing you can do right now is:
>>7219035
Send her to the right schools. Not the preppy privates with spoiled brats, but maybe a science charter/magnet, or a dual language immersion school.

If you can get a hold of common core math material that's great. Most kids are turned off by math at a very early age because they don't know the fundamentals. If you can get a head start, then go ahead. That sort of curriculum is challenging, and allows more people to learn.

I don't get the TV ban either. I learned English as a second language because of Cartoons on TV. You can find French, Spanish, any foreign language cartoons. Let them have fun.

Tell her to go outside and socialize.

[Anonymous No.7219081]

>>7219071

I agree with all of this, though I don't value the foreign language bit so much.

My girls watch a lot of TV. There are good shows on PBS and elsewhere. I'm not sure why TV gets such a bad rap.

[Anonymous No.7219103]

>>7218976
>No TV, no computer.

This

> task her to read 2 or more books a week and write about them

Not this. At least not necessarily. Intelligent parents often fret and go to the other extreme and become too demanding. Plus it is more effective to have a child do their own thinking and running it across you than to start throwing the Greeks or algebra at her.

At first you should be talking to your kid extensively. Children, before schooling, are going to be picking up shit-tons of words from the people they're around, which will most often be you (I'm assuming). Don't go full-thesaurus but use adult language. This leads to another thing you will be doing a lot of and which is important for a kids intellectual development: answering questions. They will ask you what those adult words mean, and why balloons float up, why it snows, etc. They're also going to do a lot of dumb shit you don't want them doing like picking up food off the floor and sticking shit into outlets so when you stop them you had better know why you stopped them from doing whatever it was that was going to kill them. Depending how astute your child is this may lead to thoughts or questions about death, God, and sex which are easily evaded. For example: Q:"What happens after we die?" A:"Nobody has died and come back to talk about it. I don't know." Don't be afraid to say "I don't know." It'll give your kid something to imagine and to "research". This leads to trips to the library to answer "research" questions but don't frame it as such. When the kid brings up a question and you say "I don't know..." follow up with "...but I know where we can find out. They've got all kinds of answers there." Make it a "day out" and grab a picture book. Bonus points if the subject is something that allows for "fieldwork" (rocks,bugs,stars,weather,technology,etc.) since kids will take any excuse to go outside.

[Anonymous No.7219107]

>>7219071
Also programming skills are the future. It is mandatory for all STEM fields today.

My friend from Poland first learned programming from his lisp machine. I'm not sure they make anything like that anymore. I guess the modern day equivalent would be a Raspberry Pi (?). Maybe a linux distro?

Maybe something simple as a typing game should be fun. Mavis Beacon is what worked for me.

>>7219081
There is nothing more cognitively more expanding or enriching as learning a foreign language. Old folks are learning a second tongue in efforts to combat dementia because it's proven to be more effective than any brain games or suduko or whatever.

http://www.wsj.com/articles/SB10001424052748703794104575545923443462444#articleTabs%3Darticle

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2011/02/100218-bilingual-brains-alzheimers-dementia-science-aging/

I guess I'm just bitter because of the 3 languages spoken at home, I picked up 2, and my sister picked up all 3. We only learned when young through talking through our grandparents, and it's far much harder to learn when we're older.

Though effective instruction (conversation back and forth) is far more effective than rote memorization.

---

The last option is music. My helicopter parents didn't put us in music, but everyone of my other cousins were playing the piano or violin. Yes, this is an Asian family. There's pros and cons.

Music performance is means to be comfortable in front of a stage. This grossly helps in public speaking later on. Being comfortable in front of others us jobs, to work in teams, and just a lot.

It helps teach kids with dexterity. This mattered much more when there were manufacturing jobs. A steady hand is still helpful, with touch typing, or else.

It teaches discipline and memorization techniques. I figure this is why music is popular with Asians. There really is not better way to get better at an instrument besides practicing.

[Anonymous No.7219111]

>>7219081
>I agree with all of this, though I don't value the foreign language bit so much.

I've heard it said that bi/multilingual people who learned the languages as children show differences in neurology from monolinguals. At the very least she will gain fluency in something that could be useful in intellectual/social pursuits.

[Anonymous No.7219119]

>>7219027
This. This a lot. It's probably one of the only reasons I'm studying engineering.

[Anonymous No.7219123]

>>7219061
>how the hell did the dad get custody anyway
Mom was probably trash that the court saw as obviously not fit to take care of a child.

[Anonymous No.7219126]

>>7218891
what if she wants to work as a poet or an artist? you have to let her choose. you should encourage her to work hard and find what shes really good at in order to be happy

[Anonymous No.7219135]

>>7219107
>There is nothing more cognitively more expanding or enriching as learning a foreign language.

It's a colossal waste of time and mental effort. You would be much better off studying a scientific subject or mathematics than studying a foreign language.

[Anonymous No.7219225]

>>7218891
Teach her that the only thing you expect of her is that she doesn't do things just because other people expect her to.

[Anonymous No.7219229]

>>7219225
As a follow-up

Make her environment interesting, and let her explore it rather than force things you find interesting on her.

This is why all those fucking genius scientists came from well-to-do families where the kids had a bunch of time to dick around with neat toys and enlightenment-era books/encyclopedias crammed with knowledge.

[Anonymous No.7219238]

>>7218909
Parent here... at two, just engage her with anything and everything around her. Instill a sense of curiosity at that age.

[Anonymous No.7219261]

"So i've got a daughter."

Don't waste your time teaching her math or science.

It's a well known fact that estrogen blocks most of the math receptors in the brain.

The best you can really hope for is something light like software engineering or secretarial work.

Sometimes lesbians are able to succeed in mathematics, due to their low estrogen levels, but even when they are successful, they tend to work in softer, lower difficulty areas of math like ring theory, group theory / sociology.

[Anonymous No.7219264]

>>7219261
>It's a well known fact that estrogen blocks most of the math receptors in the brain.

[Anonymous No.7219293]

>>7218976
>>7218976
please dont tell her to do this. I have a friend who lived this way, including no phone, and still lives this way, except she got a phone recently.
She ended up with schizophrenia, has gone to hospital several times for self harming and except for me (who met her when she was 17) she's never really had a friend. She's cute, but never got much attention from anyone because there's some quality about her that just made her different and this lifestyle has made her so introverted she's basically invisible. PLEASE DONT DO THIS TO YOUR GIRL

[Anonymous No.7219301]

just making another comment after the last one, i suppose limiting the amount of tv, computer and phone used may be important, but cutting her off from the outside world is dangerous, as kids dont casually play in the street as they did when my parents were young

[Anonymous No.7219302]

>>7219261
MAXIMUM OVER BAIT

[Anonymous No.7219306]

Children are little scientists, constantly conducting experiments as they explore the world. Let her explore, and then make it even better by putting her in a target rich environment. Never punish your child when they obviously just made a mess because they tried something and it didn't go so well. Use it to teach them about the beauty and complexity of nature rather than punishing them and dissuade them from experimenting in the future.

Everybody knows that if you provide a child with something enjoyable that also happens to teach them something, they will learn it. Always be on the lookout for such things, and keep in mind the importance of what is learned (learning about nature > learning how to use a computer program, for example).

Attitude is extremely critical for someone to allow themselves to approach a complex topic, as you hope that she will when she grows up. People tend to be very modest when it comes to complex topics, and say things to the effect that they're not smart enough for that stuff. Never do this around your child; as a chemist this should be easy. The attitude should always be that all you have to do to understand something is to think about it... simple. If you don't know the answer, it's a perfect opportunity to think about it together. You must instill in her the attitude that understanding nature is not intimidating. In my opinion, this is the one thing that can have the biggest impact on your child's future - most people simply will not allow themselves to approach complex topics because they think they can't do it, it's the easiest and most used cop-out. Watch videos where Richard Feynman talks about how his father interacted with him for the perfect example of this.

Also, if she's above average attractiveness, do whatever you can to prevent her from realizing that she can manipulate men to get whatever she wants for as long as possible. If she realizes this at a young age, you've got no chance.

[Anonymous No.7219347]

>>7219306

Same person again. Someone mentioned that you should encourage her to socialize. While socializing is important, keep in mind that intellectual growth does not occur while socializing being basic cultural norms and the slogans and saying that are being passed around that are no more intellectually stimulating than the tabloids. If you think about it, it is very rare for an idea to be communicated while socializing with people that is worth thinking about, and even if it is, it isn't explained well/in detail et cetera. Socializing is for making and maintaining relationships, and that's all you really get out of it. It is only when you are alone with your own thoughts are you able to consume ideas and reflect on them so that you can incorporate them in to your world view, thus growing as a person. Being comfortable in your own thoughts, being alone, is critical to becoming an intellectual person. Intellectuals are used to spending sustained periods of time alone, where they can consume ideas from documentaries, books and articles and spend hours thinking about them. You can't do this while interacting with other people. Even if an idea does come up that is worth thinking about, you still have to give yourself some time alone to reflect on it before you can intelligently incorporate it in to your mind.

The point is that time spent socializing is inversely proportional to one's capacity for intellectual pursuits. Someone who dedicates all of their time to socializing, making and maintaining relationships, has zero chance of ever becoming an intellectual on any subject at all, although they will have many friends who think very highly of them (like a politician).

[Anonymous No.7219348]

>>7218891
>So i've got a daughter.

Can I fuck her?

[Anonymous No.7219349]

>>7218891
>I just want her to be happy
fucking white knight faggot

[Anonymous No.7219355]

>>7219349
All fathers of daughters are white knights.

[Anonymous No.7219357]

>>7218891
>So i've got a daughter.
NORMIEEEEEEES GET OUT OF MY /sci/ REEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Anonymous No.7219376]

Hello OP. Single dad of 3 kids here. 12, 10 and 5yr old girl.

1. Read to her every night. Lots of pictures, big letters and short words. Your finger must follow the letters. In the UK, english is taught using phonetics (ahh, ber, ser, dur) use them to construct the words (teh, ohh, peh, top) showing her how she makes the word by speeding up the letters.

However, it has to be fun, so finish by you reading a nice magical story to her to get her to sleep (and if you are like me, you will be falling axleep at 6pm most nights too).

Youtube. Muppet videos, abc and 123 etc. Sing a lot of number songs to her (12345. Once i caught a fish alive etc)

At 2yrs, learning has to be fun. Money, save for private school. Next, go to private school, finally, private school. Cant stress this enough.

Hothousing? Helicoptering? Steamrollering? Not a fan, works for other cultures.

Environment, semi-rural, lots of open space, play parks, rivers, streams ponds woods etc. Use them a lot in summer.

Playing IS learning.

[Anonymous No.7219383]

Teach her chemistry so she can open a meth lab and make tons of money and support you in your old useless age.

[Anonymous No.7219384]

>>7219357

Dumb frogposter. Please kill yourself.

[Anonymous No.7219398]

>>7218891
talk to her. find out what she's interested in and help foster that. just be involved.

[Anonymous No.7219465]

>>7218891
Hey OP,

A lot of the ideas here are pretty decent, though a lot of the suggestions here sound like they want you to coddle/pamper your daughter, or have a classic "rack disciprine" attitude.

I don't think the most important thing is to try and restrict TV and be especially strict. There's no mom around, so you're all she has. Try to be the best dad you can be, and give her some freedom. That will help develop creativity. And I don't want to sound like an artfag or humanitiesfag here, but creativity is one of the most important things you can give to your daughter.

As for getting her interested in the sciences, first and foremost, always tell her stories about your work, and how much you enjoy being a chemist. Let her watch TV, but try to put educational things on TV. I know she's 2 right now, but the new Cosmos with Black Science Man is pretty good for children. I grew up on Bill Nye, and that's what got me into science. That and sci-fi. I read a lot of sci-fi growing up. Also READ TO HER!

Also you should develop work habits early on. The one thing I wish my parents had done for me was given me more chores (which sounds kind of weird.) I don't see why you wouldn't do this, because it means less work for you, too. I grew up thinking I didn't have to pull my own weight, and I had a really hard time in college because of it, for the first few years, until I learned how to work hard.
That being said, don't push her too hard. Make sure she does all her homework when she first starts getting it, but encourage her to manage it herself. Try to get it down to just asking her casually at dinner, "by the way did you do your homework?"

From early on, make sure you aren't the only person in her life. Have a close friend who you trust, or a family member (brother? sister?) come over frequently. That way, when the day comes around that you have to tell her that her new boyfriend is a degenerate, she has another sub-parent figure to go to.

[Anonymous No.7219469]

What I learned from university was this:

You don't learn a math concept until you do the exercises/homework.

If you can get that through your daughter, that would be great. Academia as it now structure has too much focus on the lecture as the means of teaching. Practice matters more.

Same goes with programming I guess. The more exercises/challenges you do, the better you are.

If you a sister or mother around, that helps with a raising a girl.

[Anonymous No.7219475]

>>7219465
cont
When it comes to schooling, a lot of people are going on about fancy private schools. Depending on where you live, you should really just have a look at your local public schools before going straight to a private school. Especially for elementary school. I grew up in Canada, and we have a pretty good public education system there. As long as you don't live in the ghetto, public schools are always worth checking out.

And as a final anecdote about my childhood, I recently realized that my parents had excellent judgement of my friends. My social group of friends in high school consisted of a bunch of nerds. But we weren't all regular nerds; we had academic nerds like myself, and a few theatre nerds, and some no life D&D nerds, and one thuggish football player/closeted nerd. The one thing we really shared in common was vidya, and we would LAN every week.
Anyhow, that's beside the point. I realized pretty recently that of all those people, the ones my parents approved of (and they weren't selective, they approved of a couple of the theatre nerds, some of the academic nerds, etc.) ended up being the ones that have proven to be reliable close friends many years after high school, and the few that they really didn't like ended up NEETs and one of them a drug dealer.

I guess what I'm saying is my childhood was pretty good, and I turned out pretty well (citation needed,) so my parents must have been doing something right.

[Anonymous No.7219476]

>>7219475
>using my parents as an example of good parenting
>I ended up on this shitty board on 4chan
I see my fallacy now

[Anonymous No.7219485]

>>7218891

Rape her in the ass every day for a month, then tell her to build a functioning model hydroelectric generator.

She'll either be a brilliant engineer, or daddys fucktoy.

Either one is win/win for you, if you are posting for parenting advice on 4chan, OP.

[Anonymous No.7219495]

>>7218891
>I want the same happiness for her.
try to be even more egotistic

[Anonymous No.7219508]

One thing that Is easier for kids to do than adults, is visualization. Stephen Hawkins would have been screwed if he wasn't able to visualize concepts and models. Einstein, tesla, Leo, etc.

Cultivate your kids imaginative ability through fun exercises.

Also realize she may excel in areas other than the ones you personally love.

[Anonymous No.7219519]

>>7219508
>Also realize she may excel in areas other than the ones you personally love.
Yeah, she may excel in physics, or math, or astronomy, or biology even.
But if she becomes a psych major you'd better disown her, OP.

[TheGame No.7219523]

>>7219293
>implying that having no electronics gave her schitzophrenia

[Anonymous No.7219551]

>>7218891
>Thinks that personal interests such as chemistry are genetic and can be passed on to daughter
>Thinks he must awaken her innate passion for chemistry by neglecting what she just wants for herself

This is like a shitty parenting 101 class

[Anonymous No.7219557]

>>7218976
>no computer
That's literally the worst thing you could do to a child, even worse than killing them. With a computer, that kid could be learning inter-universal teichmüller theory while the rest of her class is doing basic arithmetic.

[Anonymous No.7219558]

>>7218891
>>7218891
I come from a working class family, neither of my parents ever went to college or obtained a degree. When I was young, they divorced and I went to live with my mother, and we had no money. One summer, we lived in a trailer in my grandmother's backyard. I never had any money for hobbies as a child, and all I'd do was sit in front of the television and watch cartoons. I rarely saw my dad, and my mother was too busy working two jobs to support her children (I have 3 elder sisters) so I didn't even know what her hobbies were, or if she even had any. I graduated high school top of my class, enrolled in university, got a full scolarship, graduated magna cum laude in chemistry. And I didn't need a pushy parent trying to direct me in one direction or another.

Basic point: whether or not your daughter will be succesful or not lies predominantly in her own character, and if I was you, I'd be worried more about her becoming a cock-munching crack whore than whether or not she likes chemistry. Try to be a loving parent, above all.

[Anonymous No.7219566]

>>7219558
>Try to be a loving parent, above all.

He's trying to manipulate his kid into a scientist. He already failed the "Try to be a loving parent"-thing

[Anonymous No.7219664]

>>218896
Nope dont replace love with the world. Nor would morality skewed by incentive be desired, this is known first hand gents

[Anonymous No.7219667]

>>7219557
Tentacle poem would put an end to the science, stanza by stanza she would never even stand ta not,
Read tentacle poems.

[Anonymous No.7219681]

>>7219557
The internet is worse than TV and steadily getting worse every day. If you don't pay attention and just leave her to mess around online, then by all means, enjoy watching your child fall into depression because she's anti-social, addicted to distractions and unable to do or enjoy anything outside of her bubble.

[Anonymous No.7219874]

>>7218908
kek

[Anonymous No.7219877]

>>7219485
>>>/b/

[Anonymous No.7219879]

>>7219557
So much this:
>>7219681

Computer shouldn't be available for kids. On the internet she could learn good things, but also (and probably the only thing she'll learn) she could learn a fuckton of bad things. Just imagine if your kid discovered 4chan

[Anonymous No.7219884]

>>7219879
Also, she's going to waste her youth locked inside her room talking to pedophiles and will grow up a depressed slut that cams for money.

[Anonymous No.7220165]

>>7219485
Does it mean anything to you that the majority of this thread is honest advice from people that sound like they've been there?

[Anonymous No.7220219]

>>7219293

As much as I disagree with limiting access to technology, this sounds ridiculous. If this story is true, there was probably something else you don't know about. As for the kid, instead of restricting it, why not set a good example by teaching her how to manage technology and their life effectively. Show her that it is not just a source of entertainment but also a valuable tool.

[Anonymous No.7220226]

>>7220219
This

[Anonymous No.7221081]

>>7220165
OP here, thank you everyone. /sci/ is a great board, I knew i could count on you.

[Anonymous No.7221088]

>>7219357
Fuck off to back to >>>/r9k/, frogshitters aren't welcome on /sci/, we're a board full of smart Chads and we stole your oneitus, deal with it.

[Anonymous No.7221127]

>>7219879
>imagine if she discovered 4chan

Or, for that matter, tumblr.
>dad i'm a ponyromantic femsexual dolphinkin, my pronouns are bub/bubs/bubbleself

[Anonymous No.7221153]

Answer her questions, do experiments with her, above all, feed her curiosity

[Anonymous No.7221182]

>>7219681
>just leave her to mess around online
Who said that?
They don't necessarily have to be unsupervised to look things up on Wikipedia.

[Anonymous No.7221186]

>>7218891
Start killing any chad that gets near her.

[Anonymous No.7221187]

>>7218891
Kill yourself.

[Anonymous No.7221191]

>>7218891
How about I come to your house, completely naked, and sexually harass her while screaming how much I hate maths, science and school in general and how she should do the same.

[Anonymous No.7221245]

>>7219135
Some people study things that they're interested in.
Some people are interested in subjects outside of science and math.
If someone is more/equally interested in learning a foreign language than/as learning science and math, then that person would be "better off" studying a foreign language.
There's more to life than science and math.

[Anonymous No.7221251]

>>7219261
>It's a well known fact that estrogen blocks most of the math receptors in the brain.
nice meme, friend :^)

[Anonymous No.7222258]

>>7219071
>Most of the world is already moving away from religion, and that enough should position our next generation the right way.
tips fedora