/sci/ - Science & Math

[Anonymous No.5509271]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Physics.'
>'... sounds hard.'
'yeh...'

[Anonymous No.5509275]

>>5509271
The worst is when they mistake you for a Psychic..

FUCKING PUNCH TO THE FACE!

[Anonymous No.5509289]

>>5509275
A Physician you say?

[Anonymous No.5509288]

>>5509271
>Physics
>"Oh, I can't do maths tehee"

[Anonymous No.5509292]

>"What do you study?"
>"Maths"
>"What's 148 times 37?"

[Anonymous No.5509295]

then you answer
>Yep, I've got it hard for you baby

[Anonymous No.5509304]

>"What do you study?"
"Mechanical Engineering"
>".. So you want to fix cars?"

[Anonymous No.5509320]

>What do you study?
"Medicine"
>Yeah, that's cool.

[Anonymous No.5509327]

>>5509320
>"What do you study?"
"Medicine"
>"Can I suck your dick?"

[Anonymous No.5509331]

>>5509288
fucking everyone I talk to.
Then they say they major in Biology.
I try not to laugh

[Anonymous No.5509332]

>>5509304
Nostalgia'd a little

[Anonymous No.5509333]

>>5509327
>"What do you study?"
"Engineering"
>"Wanna suck my dick?"
Do I ever?!

[Biofag No.5509335]

>what do you study?
molecular biology
>oh so you aren't smart
sure

[Anonymous No.5509340]

>>5509335

>Looked down on by the Chemists
>Biologists think you're weird

Doesn't this ever piss you off. Happens to my flatmates all the time.

[Anonymous No.5509342]

Not me but I overheard this

>>what do you study?
English
>But you can speak it
I study it to a higher degree
>So you bascially get to learn big words?

lol'd out loud when I heard this

[Anonymous No.5509344]

Try telling someone you took Psychology before schools renamed it to neuroscience or what have you. Then tell them you are not qualified to work with people, but can train mice for films:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Rri0zcxiZ8

[Anonymous No.5509353]

>>5509271
>what do you study?
economics
>oh you like money a lot?
.....

[Anonymous No.5509349]

>>5509342
>laughed out loud out loud

[Anonymous No.5509350]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Genetics'
>'That sounds interesting'
'So does the prospect of putting my dick in you're mouth'
>'I bet you can't even spell 'your''

[Anonymous No.5509358]

>>5509342
>English
>lol'd out loud

That better have been on purpose.

[Anonymous No.5509384]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'taking showers, taking baths.'

[Anonymous No.5509391]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Math.'
>'So you want to be a teacher?'
'...'

[Anonymous No.5509401]

>mfw someone once misheard me and thought I said business

[Anonymous No.5509405]

>>5509349
rip in peace, your sense of humour

[Anonymous No.5509406]

>Hey hows it going?
>You too
>stare in the vast emptiness that was his response
>walk away, say nothing
>never speak of this to anyone

[Anonymous No.5509411]

>"hey, how're you?"
>"how're you?"

[Anonymous No.5509416]

>>5509391
>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Math.'
>'EW, WHY?! That sounds horrible.'
'...'

[Anonymous No.5509421]

>>5509416
>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Math.'
>'Quick, what's a million times a million?!'
'...'

[Anonymous No.5509420]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Computer Science.'
>'Can you fix my computer?'

[Anonymous No.5509426]

>hey
Hey what's up?
>what do you study?
Commerce, majoring in accounting
>oh lol so you're gonna be like Donald trump? Can you do my taxes?
>something like that, and naw I'm not certified yet


I could very easily do your taxes, but come on, that's ridiculous

[Anonymous No.5509434]

>>5509384
>'taking showers, taking baths.'
It's "take a shower, take a bath". I fucking remember this from like two years ago but I can't remember the full post.

+1000 internets to whoever has a link to an archive or a screencap.

[Anonymous No.5509439]

>"What do you study?"
"Mechanical Engineering"
>".. So you want to f(x) cars?"

[Anonymous No.5509446]

>"What do you study?"
"Math"
>".. So you want to f(x) cars?"

[Anonymous No.5509443]

>>5509439
top lel m8 my sides haev losted it

[Anonymous No.5509448]

>>5509446
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKS12iGFyEA

[Anonymous No.5509454]

>'Hey.'
'Hi'
>'So what do you study?'
'Chemistry.'
>'So you like blowing things up huh? xD'
'...'

[Anonymous No.5509455]

>>5509454
>are you gonna be like breaking bad or something?

[Anonymous No.5509457]

>'Hey.'
'Hi
>'So, what do you study?'
Biology
>Oh, can you please take a look at my back, there's some weird brusing and marks, do you know what it is?

[Anonymous No.5509461]

>>5509421
>Not knowing what a million times a million is

[Anonymous No.5509464]

>>5509461
That's the point.

[Anonymous No.5509465]

>>5509461
it's a million million

[Anonymous No.5509472]

>>5509434
m dot chanarchive dot org / 4chan / sci/ 54211/ study -physics

is this it

[Anonymous No.5509479]

>>5509292
5476
Didn't even need a calculator for that one, haha!
Anyone can cross big numbers in their head, you just have to see the points and know how to fit them together.

[Anonymous No.5509484]

>>5509304

Haha, more like

>so you want to suck dicks
>so you want to flip burgers

[Anonymous No.5509537]

>>5509484
>Implying Engineers have no job prospects

[Anonymous No.5509571]

>>5509537
>Implying MechE isn't the most over-saturated engineering major

[Anonymous No.5509577]

>why don't girls study what you study?
dunno, I guess it's just not interesting to them
>Well what kind of stuff are you learning
mostly how machines work like how things rotate and pieces more relative to each other
>oh, yeah, that sounds terrible

[Anonymous No.5509626]

>>5509571
>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Electronic Engineering''
>'Can you fix my...'

[Anonymous No.5509634]

>What are you studying?
"Music"
>Can I have fries with that?
"Yes, that'll be $6.77.

[swag No.5509640]

>>5509465
I'm pretty sure it's one-thousand-billion

[Anonymous No.5509642]

>go to bro's party
>lots of hot chicks
>"What do you study?"
>study Chemistry, lie and tell them philosophy
>say random bullshit I made up to look deep
>get pussy

I stopped saying the truth because they always give me that look like their vaginas are drying up.

[Anonymous No.5509659]

>>5509642
Maybe its just chemistry, whenever I tell girls at a party that I study physics, they get super wet and ask me to teach them something. Usually I go to the tried and true nucleosynthesis in stars and they think that's amazing, or sometimes I talk about the double slit experiment.

[Anonymous No.5509678]

>what do you study
>Chem E
>Wow that sounds hard

the end.

[Anonymous No.5509686]

>>5509659
>double slit experiment.

[Anonymous No.5509708]

>"What do you study?"
"Astrophysics."
>"Astrology?"
-.-

[Anonymous No.5509709]

>>5509479
Wait wut?

[Anonymous No.5509954]

>>5509708
kinda related, I told this girl I was taking a cosmology class, and she said

>cosmology? So you want to be a beautician or hairdresser or something??

[Anonymous No.5509973]

>Hi
Hey
>What do you study
You know what I study.
>Huh? What do you mean?
You're looking in the mirror.

I fall to the ground and weep, silencio.

[Anonymous No.5510018]

>>5509271
"Physics."

>"Oh, I hate physics."

Well, I hate your face.

[Anonymous No.5510050]

>What do you study
>Aeronautics
>OMG can you fly me around? XD

Can you buy a fucking plane and fuel? XD

[Anonymous No.5510068]

>>5510018

This, but with math. Like, I'm polite enough not to call them out on their "super difficult humanities classes" so they could say something nice too.

[Anonymous No.5510085]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Engineering.'
>'what kind of engineering?'
'electronic engineering'
>wow that's sounds difficult, you must be smart
'I guess, it is a little'
>so would you like to go on a date tonight?
'wow, that'd be great, shall I call you?'
>no need, I'm on hand all the time
'wait what?'
>mate, I'm your right hand
'am I talking to myself again?'
>yes you are you stupid fuck
'to think i actually took the tiime to write this shit'
>yeah says a lot about me I guess
>tfw I can't even bring myself to give a fuck

[Anonymous No.5510082]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Tits. I'm here to wander around and look at womens breasts out of the corner of my eyes. Here, feel this.'
>'... feels hard.'
'yeh... want some fuck?'
>'yes'

[Anonymous No.5510124]

>>5510085
I hate when you say X Engineering and people automatically asume that you're smart.

[Anonymous No.5510176]

To be honest anyone can do engineering. It's all about practice and time management

[Anonymous No.5510184]

>"Hey anon, what do you study?"
"Philosophy"
>"Oh, that's too hard for me."
"I know. You're a low tier pleb how needs formulas and objective evidence."
>"I wish I was as smart as you."
"No one is as smart as me. I am the most intelligent person alive."
>"Will you be my gf?"
"Haha, no. I'm only attracted to intelligence."

[Anonymous No.5510195]

>>5510184
I hear not significantly developing in 3000 years is a sign of genius

[Anonymous No.5510203]

>>5510184

Oh, gross

[Anonymous No.5510252]

"So what do you study?"
"Electrical Engineering"
"I hear electricians make good money"

[Anonymous No.5510268]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Informatics. You know what that is?'
>'Please; I'm not dumb. By the way windows 8 sucks.'
'yeh...'
>'Well good luck with your computers.'

[Anonymous No.5510277]

>>5510268
Idk what informatics is, google tiem.

[Anonymous No.5510290]

>>5510277
I guess the poster is German or French because what English-speakers know as "computer science" is known in Germany as "Informatik" and in France as "Informatique".

I (a German) also thought for years, that "Informatik" translates to Informatics in English.

[Anonymous No.5510299]

>>5510176
do you think someone who has a high 70 in grade 12 can be an engineer if he put his mind to it?

[Anonymous No.5510305]

>>5509271

'Isn't that basically just math?"

[Anonymous No.5510317]

>>5510082
Now I won't need to carry spaghetti cheese with me when I go to parties!.

[Anonymous No.5510324]

>what do you study?
physics
>oh, cool, where?
MIT
>...what?
I fear you more than you fear me.

[Anonymous No.5510333]

>>5510324

Tell Walter Lewin, "Anon says hi."

[Anonymous No.5510337]

>>5510333
wouldn't be the first time he's been told that.

[Anonymous No.5510339]

>>5510337

Then tell that nigger I can do the chalk trick better than him.

[Anonymous No.5510340]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Physics.'
>'... sounds hard.'
Actually, I'm doing it because I really enjoy it. It is hard but I like doing it.
>whoa you must be some kinda genius
No I just enjoy doing physics
>How?
Walk away

[Anonymous No.5510351]

>What are you studying?
Civil engineering.
>Like bridges?
Yeah...

[Anonymous No.5510354]

>'hey'
"Hi."
>'So, what do you study?'
'Computer Science'
>'OH can you fix computers because mine is broken'
'Sure if I have time'

[Anonymous No.5510355]

>>5510339
pics or it didn't happen

[Anonymous No.5510356]

>>5510354
>'Sure if I have time'

[Anonymous No.5510357]

>>5510356
Why would I say no? If I have the time, it certainly is more productive than just sitting around playing vidya and posting on 4chan, plus it gives me some work experience

[Anonymous No.5510361]

>>5510357
nothing is better than posting in this glorious community of faggots

[biofag No.5510364]

>>5510357
it means she wants to have sex with you

[Anonymous No.5510371]

>>5510364
false. it means she wants you to think she wants to have sex with you, when really she wants free computer service.

[Anonymous No.5510378]

>>5510290
I always wondered why English-speakers call it a "science".

Whatever, I study "computer engineering".

[biofag No.5510392]

>>5510378
i blame the british

they said they come up with everything anyway

[Anonymous No.5510393]

>Hey
'Hi'
>So, what are you studying?
'neurology'
>So you're going to be a therapist?
'no'
>oh

[Anonymous No.5510397]

>>5510378
Because Computer Science and Computer Engineering are two different fields at least in the US, I learned this when my advisor told me half way through my BS that I had chosen the wrong field for my career path

[Anonymous No.5510407]

>"Hey, what do you study?"
"System engineering"
>"Can you fix my computer"
"I could, not for free though"
>Person walks away.
Every single time.

>>5510299
You can be anything as long as you put your mind to it

[Anonymous No.5510411]

>>5510378
Computer engineering is constructan computah, computer science is figuring out how to use computah.

[biofag No.5510415]

>>5510407
>You can be anything as long as you put your mind to it

do you teach 3rd grade english at an all girls academy. get real and grow up

[Anonymous No.5510431]

>"Hey what do you study?"
"Environmental Science"
>"Oh my god, cool!"

Little do they know it's just to avoid being undeclared before I transfer!

[Anonymous No.5510443]

>>5510431
Keep it as a double major and use it to pick up treehugger chicks.
They're usually pretty good looking, if a little on the generic side.

[Anonymous No.5510455]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Computer Science'
>'OH GOD PLEASE FUCK MY PUSSY'

[Anonymous No.5510474]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Computer Science.'
>'What makes it a science?'

[Anonymous No.5510485]

>>5509642
>get drunk at party
>ICP's "miracles" comes on (this was a few years ago.)
>explain how magnets work to everyone
>apparently I puked in the fridge demonstrating fridge magnets

good times.

[Anonymous No.5510490]

>>5510474
>What does it have to do with computers?

[Anonymous No.5510498]

>Wot u study m8
Medicine
>Oh man that's fucking awsome. Dr Anon! lol!
[Screams internally: it's easy, it's just prestiged due to whatever retarded reasons]
Yeah, well, still a bit left until done smileface

[medic No.5510499]

>>5509271
>hey
yo
>wat do u study?
im not sure yet
>you dont look like u have it together
my train is here
>i hope u figure out what u want to do
i hopee you find someone better to talk to than a man waiting for a train

>this was an actual conversation

[Anonymous No.5510508]

>>5510485
>immat- tlell you how mgangnet vork...
> id's... id's fucking magic *bleeeerrgh*

[Anonymous No.5510518]

> Hey
Hello
> So, what do you study?
Programming
> ...
I... I study computers
> Oh, so you make games?
I... Yeah, I did a game once

[Anonymous No.5510529]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Chemical and Nuclear Engineering'
>'so you want to make bombs?'
'...'

[Anonymous No.5510534]

>>5509434
>2 years
Nigguh, that was a few months ago.

[Anonymous No.5510535]

>>5510529

>Hey
'Hi'.
>So what do you study?
'math and computer science"
>oh wow, nice

[Anonymous No.5510562]

>>5509434

[Anonymous No.5510586]

>>5510299
Why do you have a high 70 and you're on 4chan?? And is that a math class you have a seventy in? And which math class?

[Anonymous No.5510617]

>>5510535
>So what do you study?
'math and computer science"
>oh wow, can you fix my computer?

fixed

[Anonymous No.5510661]

>Hey
Hi.
>So, what do you study?
Mathematics
>Dang, why?
I want to do math research.
>Do you research new ways to count backwards or something? What's the biggest number?

This was an actual conversation.

[Anonymous No.5510728]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Physics and Math'
>'so like an engineer?'

ffs, it's like people haven't heard of scientists.

[Anonymous No.5510748]

>>5510518
Charlie?

[Anonymous No.5510764]

>>5510728

Mathematicians aren't necessarily scientists.

They lack the whole "scientific method" thing. They're more definitive not needing experimentation where scientists do.

[Anonymous No.5510768]

>>5509271

OP is a pretentious ego highing faggot. fuck you and fuck your wanna be "asian waifu" in your pic, faggot.

[Anonymous No.5510852]

>>5510768
So what do you study?

[Anonymous No.5510859]

>>5510852
Working on my PhD in undeclared

[Anonymous No.5510866]

>>5509634
A scientist's idea of a joke.

[Anonymous No.5510869]

>"what do you study"
"astrophysics"
>"so you are like an astronaut?"

[Anonymous No.5510876]

>>5510859
Bullshit.

[Anonymous No.5510878]

>what do you study?
"Major in English double minor in-
>so you plan to be unemployed? trolololo-
No, asshole.

I plan to be an english teacher

[Anonymous No.5510881]

>"what do you study"
"liberal arts at the community college"
at this point people burst into laughter so hard that they pee an cry at the same time

[Anonymous No.5510918]

>"what do you study"
Biomedical Engineering
>"Damn, good luck with that"
thanks

[Anonymous No.5510927]

>'So, what do you study?'
'What? How did I get here? Who are you? What am I doing talking to someone outside of my college?'

Everyone I talked to at Uni was basically the same major as me.

[Anonymous No.5510938]

>>5509537
>Implying engineering isn't saturated as my homeopathic medicine.

[Anonymous No.5510951]

>>5510299
Depends why you have a high seventy. If you are working your ass off and that's the best you can do, you are probably too dumb. If you have a high 70 because you are a slacker, you COULD do it, but you will probably flunk out because it requires an insane amount of work.

I finished grade 12 with a 79 average and I am doing a mechanical engineering major. My marks stayed close to that in first year. Now I'm in second year and I'm considering switching majors because it is 2hard4me. Not the concepts, they're easy as fuck, but the fact that I have to spend so much time on it.

[Anonymous No.5510962]

it is so common for people to say something like
>wow that's a lot of math courses! that's awful! i would hate that! i hated math in high school! have fun with that! :P :P

but imagine if it was me saying
>wow look at those courses in managerial accounting/british literature/cultural anthropology survey/post colonialism

>i would just hate that! that sounds terrible!

everybody would stare at you like you just slapped them in the face. but if people shit talk math/sci you're just expected to laugh along

[Anonymous No.5510964]

>>5510962

that's because math people aren't insecure about their choices. we can laugh along witht hem knowing we are superior.

[Anonymous No.5510974]

>>5510964
decent point. i usually respond to
>wow i hated math in high school
by saying 'yeah me too'

that always throws people for a loop

[Anonymous No.5511007]

>>5510485
They didn't know how magnets worked?

Was this a party for first graders?

[Anonymous No.5511627]

>so what do you do for a living?
i work in finance
>like at a bank?
no, i work at a hedge fund.
>is that like a mutual fund?
(getting bored), yeah, its something like a mutual fund.
>oh really, i put my money in this mutual fund and i lost a lot of money on it where would you recommend i put my money what stocks should i buy is buying bonds good now hey btw whats up with the interest rate on my mortage huh?
i'm sorry i have to return some videotapes.

[Anonymous No.5511646]

>>5509659
>Talks about the double slit experiment
>Dies buried under a pile of pussies
Yeah, happens to me all the time.

[Anonymous No.5511659]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Astrophysics'
>'Woaa you must be so smart !'
'You damn right I am bitch.'

or

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Astrophysics'
>'Sooo what do you do ? What are your courses about ?'
'Carrots. I study carrots.'

[Anonymous No.5511667]

>>5511627
>>i'm sorry i have to return some videotapes.

[Anonymous No.5511679]

>>5510397
>>5510411
Computer engineering is, well, engineering, but the stuff people call "computer science" looks like mathematics to me.

[Anonymous No.5511682]

>Study music technology
>implying anyone gives a shit about that enough to ask me anything

My dream is to study cosmology later on, but despite being good at math, I didn't get along with my physics teacher, subsequently even dropping physics for biology.

what the hell do I do now ;_;

[Anonymous No.5511697]

>Oh, I haven't seen you so long, little anon.
Yeah. Hi, uncle anon
>Your mom tells me you are a math whiz
Umm...well I'm majoring in math but--
>What is 1765 times 1,100,945.2?

[Anonymous No.5511706]

>>5511659
>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Astrophysics'
>'Sooo what do you do ? What are your courses about ?'
Like horoscopes and stuff. What is your sign? Leo? I just figured that one out this morning. Leo's are should be looking a big, unexpected but positive change in their life soon.
>'Fuck me till I love you right now!'

[Anonymous No.5511708]

>What do you study
Computer architecture
>Hey, can you tell me why my youtube is running slow today?

[Anonymous No.5511709]

>>5511697
>What is 1765 times 1,100,945.2?

Sorry, I haven't taken that class yet.

[Anonymous No.5511716]

>>5509271
>you look fun
>yeh
>lets go
>where
>take here hand
>...
>sex
>see we are fun
works every time.

[Anonymous No.5511744]

>>5511007
How do they work?

[Anonymous No.5511750]

>>5509271
How many times are we going to do this thread?

Ah, fuck it, I had from stupid pure sci bitch yesterday:

>What do you study?'
Chemical Engineering
>WHY DO YOU HATE THE ENVIRONMENT! ;_;

Fucking freshman.

[Anonymous No.5511781]

>>5511697
>What is 1765 times 1,100,945.2?

1000 x 1,100,945.2 = 1,100,945,200
700 x 1,100,945.2 = 770,661,640
60 x 1,100,945.2 = 66,056,712
5 x 1,100,945.2 = 5,504,726

1,100,945,200
770,661,640
66,056,712
+5,504,726
__________
1,943,168,278

>mfw I did that all in my head
>mfw I'm not even in college yet
>mfw I won't even be a math major

[Osiris No.5511786]

>>5509271
Yeah I wanted to study something which difficulty matched the state of my penis upon seeing your beautiful face, my love.

[Anonymous No.5511790]

>>5511781
Multiplying numbers (as in doing the operation) has nothing to do with math. Also it is in no way impressive that you could do it. Pls be trolling.

[Anonymous No.5511802]

>>5511790
lel someone's mad and delusional

[Anonymous No.5511808]

Currently, short summary of most conversations:
>I'm in medical school.
>zomg, that must be so hard and you have to know so much.
>Not really.
>Oh, okay.

In the past, actual conversation:
>What do you study?
>Chemistry.
>Okay, so what kind of job can you do with that? Teaching chemistry in high school or something?
>Yeah, they only made up chemistry to pester people in high school with.
>Really?
>No.

[Anonymous No.5511812]

>>5511750
>Chemical Engineering
>>WHY DO YOU LOVE MONEY? ;_;
Ah... the path not taken...

[Anonymous No.5511830]

>>5509292

You deserve it for saying maths faggot.

It's Mathematics.

[Anonymous No.5511835]

>>5511790
it's pretty impressive that he can do that in his head, if he is indeed telling the truth.

[Anonymous No.5511840]

>>5510562
yay my post is in an archived thread i'm so very special

[Anonymous No.5511843]

>>5511812
Funnily enough, most normalfags assume engineers are poor despite having the highest statistical salaries of any undegrad degree. Probably because their retarded family members are technicians calling themselves engineers.

I wish the humanities faculty would raise their standards.

>>5511835
Not really, everyone can do that but they assume they can't because some time ago someone apparently decided that there is a time limit to answering arithmetic questions. And >>5511790 is right, it has nothing to do with mathematics.

[Anonymous No.5511844]

>"What do you study?"
>"Economics"
>"greedy cunt"

[Anonymous No.5511849]

> What do you study?
Geology
> do you want to become a priest?

[Anonymous No.5511852]

>>5511849
wat?

[Anonymous No.5511854]

>>5509626
Bad counter example. EE master race.
> materials science is starting to kill it down though.

[Anonymous No.5511855]

>>5511852
>geology
>THeology

it's a pretty weak mistake though.

[Anonymous No.5511857]

>>5511855
Ah, ok, now I get it

[Osiris No.5511877]

>>5511854
Materials science is what I want to get into.
How fucked am I in terms of study and work to do on the road ahead?

[Anonymous No.5511893]

>"What do you study?"
Geology

>"Oh so like Egypt and the Romans and stuff?"
>"Oh so like dinosaurs and stuff?"
>"Oh so like maps and stuff?"
>"GEOLOGY ISN'T A REAL SCIENCE HURRRHURR YOU KNOW LIKE BIG BANG THEORY? XD

I'm just going to say business from now on.

[Anonymous No.5511895]

>>5511893
quotation marks plus greentext
forgive me
it's 3 am

[Anonymous No.5512054]

It's either that or biology

[Anonymous No.5512072]

>>5509420
THIS

[Anonymous No.5512074]

Just say infantile psychology and use your common sense to lie and get beaches.

[Anonymous No.5512121]

*after talking to a girl for a few mins*
>"so what are you studying?"
'Mechanical engineering'
>"sounds hard"
/conversation

*after talking to somebody over the age of 30*
>"so what are you studying?"
'Mechanical engineering'
>"thats a proper degree that, not like these media or history courses that everybody is doing nowadays "

[Anonymous No.5512118]

>>5511843
If I multiply 58x65 for example I get 3480 and then when I move to multiplying 58x5 to get the second half of the answer I forget the number 3480.

Not "everyone" can do it, some of us are limited to shitty working memory.


inb4 >hurr us suck at math u dumb
I'm studying Engineering and am averaging 76% in maths so far despite being a waster who never studies.

[Anonymous No.5512177]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Mathss.'
>'Are you going to become a Maths teacher then?'
'...'

[Anonymous No.5512183]

>>5509391
>>5512177
Either samefag or hivemind?

[Anonymous No.5512204]

"What do you study?"
>Software engineering.
"What does that entail?
>Y'know the software on your computer?
"Yeah".
>I engineer shit like that
"Oh, Okay".

[Anonymous No.5512215]

>What do you study?
"Psychology."
>Oh, so you already analyzed me?
"No."

Every time. It's so cliché that I'm surprised people still do that.

[Anonymous No.5512264]

>Hey
Hello
>Whats your major
Biochemistry
>WOW thats impressive. So are you going to make drugs in your basement

[Anonymous No.5512267]

>>5512215
that is why I switched out of Psy into chemistry
srsly so I would never hear that again
that and its all bs

[Anonymous No.5512294]

>>5509642
i just lol'ed so hard. chemists are sexy ;)

[Anonymous No.5512297]

>What do you study?
Physics and EE double major
>Cool! which course did you enjoy the most?
I mostly enjoyed the courses in mathematical theory. Math is like art, only for smart people.
>Oh cool! I'm reading a book about poincare conjecture, can you explain to me what are ”simply connected domains"?
Sure!

My first conversation with my current gf

[Anonymous No.5512326]

>>5509292
Holy shit. Math isn't my major, but I'm always doing it because compsci and I come across this shit all the time.

It either goes
>I get a calculator
HAHA ANON YOU MUST NOT BE VERY GOOD
or
>I think 10 seconds about it
HAHA ANON YOU MUST BE SO SLOW

Like fuck off.What if I hovered over you and told you every time you misplaced a fucking comma. Fuck.

[Anonymous No.5512353]

>>5512297
>Math is like art, only for smart people.
10/10

[Anonymous No.5512377]

>>5512297
10/10

[Anonymous No.5512412]

>>5509416
This. All I need to do is say function and my fucking environment studies friends are donezo

[Anonymous No.5512419]

Erm, mathfags, you know you can round large numbers and nobody cares?

>1765 times 1,100,945.2?
1.75*1'000*1'000'000 = 1.75*10^9
Then add some more because of the 0.1 and the 0.065 you left out and you get 1.85*10^9 which is pretty decent.

[Anonymous No.5512449]

>>5512297
>reading a book about poincares conjecture
>not knowing what a simply connected domain is

[Anonymous No.5512466]

>>5510184
hahahahaha
>philosophy
>intelligence
..pick one

[Anonymous No.5512476]

>>5511790
sorry what im no mathematician but arnt multiplying numbers encompassed in the subject of mathematics?

i know this may sound stupid but im new to this board and further maths education

[Anonymous No.5512498]

>What are you studying?
International Relations ;_;
>Oh so you're gonna be some superspy diplomat traveling for free working for the government?
No I'm gonna be a superbum working for free, negotiating my welfare with the government.

[Anonymous No.5512542]

>>5511781
>>5512419

[Anonymous No.5512576]

>>5509642

>physicists get more pussy than chemists

I suppose it is time to become better acquainted with my virginity. Its going to be a long partnership...

[Anonymous No.5512581]

>>5509288
I was so bad with my maths that the head of the physics department called me to his office specifically to tell me to give up on all of my dreams and switch to a liberal arts major.
It was the most soul-crushing day of my life.

[Anonymous No.5512601]

>>5509571
>implying ChemE isn't more saturated

[Anonymous No.5512602]

>>5512581

lol did they also make a public announcement throughout the whole building during class?

[Anonymous No.5512611]

>>5512602
Thankfully, no.

[Anonymous No.5512624]

>What do you study?
>Psychology
>Ok what am I thinking right now?

[Anonymous No.5512635]

>>5512581

So, did you transfer?

[Anonymous No.5512643]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Biology.'
>'so you're going to be a doctor???'
'...'

every. fucking. time.
NO.

[Anonymous No.5512657]

lol did they offer you cash to quit because your grades were so bad they were bringing down the college reputation to shit-tier?

[Anonymous No.5512652]

>>5509420
Can you?

you should be able to.

[Anonymous No.5512659]

>>5510184
Fucking baitlord

0/10, even with response.

[Anonymous No.5512672]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
Chemistry, you?
>History

automatically feel superior to them

[Anonymous No.5512683]

>>5512672

you walk away feeling superior, they walk away with their head down

>yfw historian was actually trying really hard to cover up his smirk of superiority because he'll be set with a teaching job while you'll be a stuck-up NEETfag :D

[Anonymous No.5512697]

>What are you studying?
"Chemical engineering."
>...so you're going to make bombs?!
"Yeah. Or table salt."

[Anonymous No.5512698]

>what do you study?
>packaging science.
>lol, so you will work in a box factory?
>no, i'll just design boxes

[Anonymous No.5512704]

>>5512683
id rather be neet than a deluded idiot

[Anonymous No.5512721]

>>5512683
>implying science teachers aren't in demand

[Anonymous No.5512724]

>>5512721

yeah but while a historyfag is content with a teacher's job, you moral superiority sciencefags will never settle for it

[Anonymous No.5512819]

>What do you study?
'Mathematics.'

From here, you can basically get two responses (from personal experience).

>What can you do with that? / What's x times y.
'Alot, actually' / I have no clue, that has almost nothing to do with mathematics.

If people don't break off here, the ongoing conversation varies per person. I'm quite patient with others, but the 'what's x times y' question pisses me off to no end though.

[Anonymous No.5512844]

>>5512498
lettuce be cereal that never happened and would never happen

[Anonymous No.5512849]

>>5512698
...

[Anonymous No.5512862]

>>5512819
>the 'what's x times y' question pisses me off to no end though.

You could just say that the answer is xy. You'd be right and they would feel dumb.

[Anonymous No.5512876]

>So, what do you study?
Chemical Engineering.
>Is that like, making bombs and shit?
N-no . . .
>Oh, so is it more like shampoo?
Yeah.

[Anonymous No.5512899]

>>5509288

>"Oh, I can't do maths either"

FTFY

[Anonymous No.5512902]

>What do you study?
Computer Science.
>Oh, can you fi—
No.

[Anonymous No.5512918]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'English.'
>'... I'm so, so sorry.'
'yeh...'

I wish so many people didn't fucking say this to me

[Anonymous No.5512933]

>>5512862
Think about what you just wrote and you'll be the one feeling dumb.

[Anonymous No.5512956]

>>5510869
>i wish ;_;

[Anonymous No.5512963]

>>5509626
can you change my light bulb

[Anonymous No.5512997]

>>5512724
I would...
What's wrong with educating people?

[Anonymous No.5513058]

>>5512997
High school kids are hell to teach. And it gets worse if you're teaching something like chemistry.


Ever wonder why there's no Dead Poets Society-esque movie about a stem field?

[Anonymous No.5513060]

>>5510474
first 30 seconds
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=zQLUPjefuWA

[Anonymous No.5513078]

I'm surprised no ChemEs posted this one:

>what do you study?

chemical engineering

>oh yeah, being a chemist is real hard...

[Anonymous No.5513105]

>>5513060

thats why Europe and rest of the world is calling it informatics or information science

[Anonymous No.5513117]

>>5510085
Thanks for the lolz

[Anonymous No.5513122]

>what do you study?
Chemical Engineering
>i'm terrible at and hate math/chemistry
>wow, you must be really smart, that sounds difficult
>can you make me LSD?
>*rant about how we ruin the environment*

I've stopped saying I'm a ChemE and usually just say textile arts and basket-weaving major. I'm a great bullshitter, so usually it makes for a good conversation segway and a couple of laughs.

[Anonymous No.5513185]

>>5509335
What's strange about studying molecular bio?

[Anonymous No.5513198]

>>5512643

Why the fuck not!?

Don't you realize that "biologist" is a shit career.

[Anonymous No.5513229]

>What do you study?
Chemis-
>LOL DO YOU COOK METH!?

[Anonymous No.5513238]

>>5512933

Nope, can't see any error in my statement.

x times y = x times y

[Anonymous No.5513242]

>>5509406
This really got me.

[Anonymous No.5513246]

> "Hey."
"Hi."
> "So, what do you study?"
"Medicine."
> "Like medical school? To be a doctor?"
"Yeah."
> "Can I please place myself on your dick?"

[Anonymous No.5513274]

>So what do you study?
chemistry
>whoa really can you tell me how to make ecstasy?
*think for a minute*
treat 3,4-Dihydroxybenzaldehyde with base and methylene iodide. add nitro ethane after a few hours. extract and reduce with excess lithium aluminum hyrdride...
>they stop paying attention
why the fuck did you ask me?

[Anonymous No.5513293]

>>5509271
> ohey
Hi
> how are you?
Bad. Can't figure out how to multithread the solution to Project Euler n.11. At least I have a slew of manuals, so I should find out soon.
> ...
...

Oh yeah, okay *gnntnwas small talk* Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. And you?

[Anonymous No.5513340]

>>5513229
I never get tired asking chemists that. I know most of them don't but still. Just too easy to pass up.

[Anonymous No.5513368]

>>5509426

Do my taxes mother fucker

[Anonymous No.5513372]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'computer science.'
>'ugh, what a nerd, eeew'
'yeh... heh. heh.'

[Anonymous No.5513374]

>>5511781
Hello mister autistic savant!

[Anonymous No.5513431]

>>5512542
This is very true. because honestly the simple stuff is pretty useless in the higher levels and it goes in the back of the head to make room for the current formulas/theorem

[Anonymous No.5513451]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Physics.'
>'... what are you going to do with that degree after you graduate?'

[Anonymous No.5513467]

>What do you study
>Physics
>Oh, so you must like the Big Bang Theory

This actually happened to me once, was helping someone pick out a couch at a furniture store and the saleslady asked me what my major was, conversation went down exactly like this and proceeded to get worse.

[Anonymous No.5513507]

>>5513467
i bet you responded with something edgy like "haha no that show is for plebs!! xDD"

[Anonymous No.5513508]

>>5510354
>'Hey!'
Hey.
>What are you majoring in?
Computer Science. What about you?
>Political Science and Chinese
Oh wow, Chinese is hard as shit. Im bad at learning languages, I tried French and failed miserably.
>'Oh Anon, I have so much respect for people who are doing Computer Science. Its so hard, but its like learning a language too! Except with all the nuances of mathematics. I have a lot of repsect for you.

>8/10 blonde girl
>respect
>giveherthedick.jpg

Probably one of the best nights at Applebys ever.

[Anonymous No.5513512]

>>5513467
>not saying "I've never seen it"
>not saying " It's okay"
>not saying "Yes" and then changing the subject

enjoy virginity

[Anonymous No.5513515]

>>5513507
On the contrary, I went full beta.

[Anonymous No.5513516]

>>5513467
All the fucking time.

OR
>I saw Michio Kaku on TV recently.

[Anonymous No.5513522]

>>5513512
I did say "I've never seen it" so she took the liberty of going on to describe it. I just ended with Sounds interesting... I...I'll go check it out. To which she responded with something like "you'll love it."

I felt kind of sick afterwards.

[Anonymous No.5513523]

>>5513522
did you give her the dick

[Anonymous No.5513526]

>>5513523
No.

[Anonymous No.5513573]

>>5510962
the fuck? I do this regularly.
>implying I give a fuck if they get butthurt

[Anonymous No.5513989]

>>5512121
Oh god, don't EVER tell a girl you're doing engineering.

[Anonymous No.5513993]

>>5512297
Am I a bad person for assuming that this girl is extremely ugly?

[Anonymous No.5513997]

Talking to decent 8.5/10 in work break room.

>So, what are you studying?
Physics major.
>Ew, sounds very 'sciency'.
Yeah, it's great.
>I'm doing psychology, *chuckles*

At this point I laughed out loud and she just walked away. Perhaps we weren't laughing for the same reason, lol.

Happened today.

[Anonymous No.5513998]

>>5513078
I've never had that before, people in my city always assume it's superior to chemistry because of the extra word. Most of them probably never even took chem in High-school though.

[Anonymous No.5514000]

>>5513198
>field biologist
>Not one of the most fun-tier job in history

[Anonymous No.5514004]

>>5513238
I think he thought you meant actually saying 'x' and 'y' in the conversation as apposed to replacing them with actual numerical values like.
> Math huh, what's 18631654 times 165742347
It's exactly 18631654 times 165742347, you stupid bitch.

[Anonymous No.5514006]

>>5513246
>Implying they let you out of the hospital long enough to talk to girls.

[Anonymous No.5514010]

>>5513515
Good choice tbh, people get really pissed of when they realize the stereotypes they invented were wrong because it makes them feel even more inferior.

[Anonymous No.5514011]

When people ask partner and I what we're doing at university:

>"What are you studying?"
Nanotechnology.
>"Thats like, tiny stuff right? Like tiny robots?"

>"So, what are you studying?"
Psychology.
>"oooh you gonna try and analyse me? Should I be scared? Want me to lie down on a couch and talk about my childhood?"

[Anonymous No.5514013]

>>5513997
>Perhaps we weren't laughing for the same reason, lol.
You were kind of a cunt.
Self-deprecating humor isn't a green light for you to make fun of her. You basically told her to fuck off only on high tier of assholeishness.

[Anonymous No.5514015]

>>5514011
It's not their fault that somewhere along the line we decided to create the most ill-defined buzzword ever (innovation coming in at a close second).

[Anonymous No.5514016]

>>5514013
I know, it was great.

[Anonymous No.5514017]

>>5513989
>>5513993
>>5513998
>>5514000
>>5514004
>>5514006
>>5514010
>>5514013
>>5514015
Oh god, why the hell did I read through the whole thread and posted unfunny replies that no one will ever read.I need to get of 4chan.

[Anonymous No.5514018]

>>5514016
>>5514017
Thank you anon, your reply makes me feel a bit better about myself.

Was the look on her face worth not getting some quality pussy?

[Anonymous No.5514019]

>>5514018
Oh yeah, for sure. I couldn't handle being around a psychologist from such a shit-tier university (essentially a trade school) for much longer than the brief time we speak each shift.

[KKRajputana !KKRajputhA No.5514023]

>>5513989
All the Medic/econ/psych girls get on your dick if you tell them you do engineering. Make sure you don't dress/act like an autist though.

[Anonymous No.5514026]

>>5512576

Do they really? I would think they would go for chemists more, since most people know jack shit about physics and slightly above jack shit about chemistry.

[Anonymous No.5514035]

>>5514023
In my experience they just become intimidated, I try to stave off the 'what's your major' question for as long as possible.

[KKRajputana !KKRajputhA No.5514045]

>>5514035
Interesting. It must depend on demographics and the type of engineering.

Eng is such a cockfest that the spring ball is ALWAYS joint with Psychology here. It's like shooting fish in a barrel because the Electricals/Mech/Comp are full autist while the Eng Design, Civil and Aeros are like the Jocks of my university.

The Electricals/mech/comp always turn up to the ball in poorly fitting SUITS, not tuxedos and drink pints. I mean what the fuck? Who drinks pints at a formal?

[Anonymous No.5514068]

This thread is awful. Truly awful.

[Anonymous No.5514072]

>>5514045
>Who drinks pints at a formal?
Uncultured cunts.

[Anonymous No.5514077]

>>5514068
Thank you for improving it.
-the thread

[Anonymous No.5514080]

>"What do you study?"
>"Cognitive science"
>"What's that?"

Granted the name can sometimes be deceptive but in this case it's pretty much spelled out in the name.

[Anonymous No.5514115]

>>5510498
>Hey
Hi
> Whatchu study?
Medicine
> Can you tell me what's going on with me? I keep *insert random-could-be-anything symptom.*

[Anonymous No.5514148]

>>5509271
>'What do you study?'
'Physics'
>'Oh, I do economics! We're both nerds lol'

[Anonymous No.5514155]

>>5510498
>it's just prestiged due to whatever retarded reasons]
Because your field's bureaucratic scumbags are better than other field's bureaucratic scumbags at keeping the degree artificially valuable.
Also medfags are the only intelligent people plebs will get to meet on a regular basis.

[Anonymous No.5514166]

>>5514115
>Can you tell me what's going on with me? I keep *insert random-could-be-anything symptom.*
I do this with my brother, giving him increasingly general/ambiguous/fewer symptoms, then when he doesn't give an immediate answer I chastise him;
"HOW DO YOU JUSTIFY THE EXISTENCE OF YOUR WORTHLESS FIELD WITH ITS SHITTY RIGOR IF YOU CAN'T EVEN USE IT TO SOLVE BASIC HEALTH PROBLEMS WITH IT!"

Revenge plot for him calling calculus worthless once. He hasn't caught on yet.

[Anonymous No.5514187]

>>5514115

http://www.forbes.com/sites/bruceupbin/2013/02/08/ibms-watson-gets-its-first-piece-of-business-in-healthcare/

[Anonymous No.5514192]

>Hey.
Hi.
>So, what do you study?
Genetics.
>Didn't they already figure that genetics is because of dna?
.....

or

>Hey.
Hi.
>So, what do you study?
Evolutionary Biology
>JESUSGODBIBLEADAM&EVEMOSESTORAHALAHDORATHEEXPLORERGODGODGODCHRISTJESUSCHRISTRELIGIONBULLSHITGODISGOODJEEEESUSSSSS

[Anonymous No.5514199]

>>5514187
>http://www.forbes.com/sites/bruceupbin/2013/02/08/ibms-watson-gets-its-first-piece-of-business-in-healthcare/

Engineering: Destroying traditional jobs and forcing more people into STEM. Still hate math faggots? Time to deal with it.

[Anonymous No.5514299]

>>5514192
>Didn't they already figure that genetics is because of dna?
>JESUSGODBIBLEADAM&EVEMOSESTORAHALAHDORATHEEXPLORERGODGODGODCHRISTJESUSCHRISTRELIGIONBULLSHITGODISGOODJEEEESUSSSSS

'Murica!

[Anonymous No.5514318]

>>5510498
Dude, do you even internship?
Do you even 36 hours working time?
>Every fucking day

[Anonymous No.5514325]

>'Hey.'
"Hello."
>'So, what do you study?'
"Uh... Law and Maths."
>'...'
"Yep, that's how people tend to react."

>implying qt corean popstars (or anybody at all) comes up and talks to me

[Anonymous No.5514331]

>>5514045
What's wrong with wearing a suit? Supposed to be more formal than a tuxedo, no?

[Anonymous No.5514337]

>>5514013
She said "ew" when he said "physics"; she deserved it.

[Anonymous No.5514340]

>So what do you study?
Geology
>LEL, look at this faggot thinking he does hard science

[KKRajputana !KKRajputhA No.5514343]

>>5514331
Not in the evening. No. Don't do it.

[KKRajputana !KKRajputhA No.5514347]

>>5514340
>geology
>yeah some of the stuff I study is pretty hard

[Anonymous No.5514355]

>'Hey.'
'Hi.'
>'So, what do you study?'
'Criminology.'
>'Oh, that's like the stuff in CSI, right?'
'...'

Always.

[Anonymous No.5514360]

>>5514343
Where are you? Here, people would wear a suit to a wedding, a formal, a dinner, etc.. Maybe some people wear a tuxedo, but they stand out.

[Anonymous No.5514363]

>>5514347
>Geology
>Oh, that rocks!

[Anonymous No.5514364]

>>5514355
Nice subject of study!
Can you answer me one question? What is the country with the lowest overall crime rate? Norway?

[KKRajputana !KKRajputhA No.5514368]

>>5514360
I'm from the UK.
During the day, a suit is fine.
Any event after 7pm though, that's tuxedo territory.
Looking at my formal pictures now, the only two people I know wearing a suit are from the north.... everyone else is in a tux.

[Anonymous No.5514376]

>>>/tv/

[Anonymous No.5514380]

>>5514368
Well, so far as I've noticed in Australia and Japan, tuxedoes are basically never worn.

[Anonymous No.5514392]

>What do you study?
(Think to myself: they prob won't know what it is..) Nanotechnology Engineering...
>Oh Engineering is hard!
.... yeah.. and I'm in the hardest discipline ;_;

[Anonymous No.5514394]

>>5514364
I'm not quite sure since the scandinavian countries have very similar rates (the lowest in the world).

[Anonymous No.5514398]

>>5514392

>hard

lol

just like the dick you'll have to suck.

[Anonymous No.5514402]

>>5514394
Ok, thank you.

[Anonymous No.5514403]

>>5514398
Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know that Tesla was replying to this thread. How's that Math/Physics degree doing for you, considering that you have the creativity of a retarded cockroach?

[2by4 No.5514413]

>>5510918
>what do you study anon?
Biomedical Engineering
>OMG anon you know about medicine and your an engineer?
Yeah...
>Please fuck me so you cant go to medical school after you graduate.
Pssh...bitch please 9/10 scum

[Anonymous No.5514437]

>>5514004

Right, but seeing how (x)(y) has only variables with no context then it is the only correct answer except (y)(x), but that is redundant.

[Anonymous No.5514451]

>>5514437
(1/sqrt(yx))^-2
That'll make them think.

[Anonymous No.5514466]

>>5514325
>Law AND Maths.
Yeah, I'd probably react with a 'wat' or '...' too'.

[Anonymous No.5514473]

>>5514337
> she deserved it.
She deserved to be hate fucked more imo.

[Anonymous No.5514514]

>>5514466
The university offers a standard structure for it, at that.

Lord Denning studied mathematics, and Fermat was a lawyer, so I'm in good company, at least.

Frankly, I think the law could do with a few pointers from maths.

[Anonymous No.5514524]

>>5514514
Leibniz was also a lawyer.

[Anonymous No.5514567]

>>5509406

[Anonymous No.5514573]

>>5514403

pretty well actually, considering I'm applying myself entrepreneurially and creatively applying my skills.

give me five more years and I might just be ready to get my dick sucked by your kind.

[Anonymous No.5516530]

>>5512601
>ChemE
>Saturated
i see what you did there

[Anonymous No.5517160]

>>5509405
rest in peace in peace.

[Anonymous No.5517315]

'microbiology'
>oh, you're a doctor then
'sure'

[Anonymous No.5517321]

>>5510869
eryy time