Cats; loving pets or alien spies?

[Anonymous No.3937524]

They are biological transmitters working as spies for Aliens. Take these facts into account and reach your own conclusion… Beware, what you are about to read will forever change the way you see these minions of our extraterrestrial oppressors.

1. There is no documentation before Ancient Egypt that mentions the existence of Cats, and IN Ancient Egypt, they are worshipped as Gifts from The Gods.

2. Science is baffled by a cat's purr, and cannot determine how the sound is produced. (Feedback, much?)

3. If you hold a cat's ears back and describe what you see, it is a perfect match to the classic 'Grey'. Almond shaped eyes, small mouth, small nose.

Freaked out yet? How about these:

4. A cat can see exponentially better than you. Making it appear that it must be more advanced evolutionarily speaking. How?

5. Ever watch a cat wake from a deep sleep and run out of the room in an instant? Transmissions from the mothership coming in, and must be alone.

6. All things that come out of cats are totally unnatural. (Not of this earth.)

Still not convinced? I got a few more for the more skeptical among you:

7. Cats survive situations that any Earthbound animal would surely perish in. How can a cat fall out of a four story building backwards, and land on its feet? (Anti gravity properties)

8. If you die, your cats will eat you. Not really a link between cats and Aliens, but still pretty creepy.

9. Ever wake up and your cat was sitting on your chest, staring at you? Taking your will not to do their bidding and dreaming of the day their Alien handlers once again fit you for your yolk and chains.

[Anonymous No.3937538]

[Anonymous No.3937553]

>8. If you die, your cats will eat you. Not really a link between cats and Aliens, but still pretty creepy.
I lol'd

[Anonymous No.3937572]

I hate cats as much as the next normal guy, selfish pieces of shit, they aren't loyal at all.

But i don't think they are aliens there guy.
>8. If you die, your cats will eat you. Not really a link between cats and Aliens, but still pretty creepy.

Just selfish pieces of shit who were never loyal in the first place.

[Anonymous No.3937588]

My cat doesn't even eat lunch meat =|

[Anonymous No.3937760]

[Anonymous No.3937770]

>1. There is no documentation before Ancient Egypt that mentions the existence of Cats, and IN Ancient Egypt, they are worshipped as Gifts from The Gods.

[Anonymous No.3937797]

1) just go talk to a zoologist, or just see >>3937770

2)science also doesn't know how a bicycle stays upright, not has science ever claimed to be complete

3)What?

4) do tell how better line of sight effects speech, also do explain exponential sight

5)[citation needed]

6) Well they contain things from this earth in side them.. so that seems wrong... also [citation needed]

7)I dont know... have you ever gone parachuting? people turn them selves around for fun all the time in free fall....

8)[citation needed]

9)What? my dog does this all the time, is he still an alien? ever wonder why women love to cuddle? cuz the chest is warm... who doenst like curling up against something warm?

[Anonymous No.3937814]

>>3937797
>2)science also doesn't know how a bicycle stays upright, not has science ever claimed to be complete

I'm pretty sure that it has been established that the rider keeps the bike upright with the help of momentum. If you have good enough balance then you can sit on a bike when it is completely motionless but almost anyone can keep balance on a moving bike.

[AcidFrippFag (Tyler, the Coоltop-Loving Touristfish420) !!aA0GbTMNLDz No.3937848]

>>3937797
You DO realise that this is a joke thread, right?
Your autism isn't that bad, is it?

[Anonymous No.3937903]

>>3937797
ur so smart