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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/sci/ - Science & Math

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3904067

Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:17:21 2011 No.3904067 [Reply] [Original]

An elderly lady was well-known for her faith and for her boldness in talking about it.

She would stand on her front porch and shout "PRAISE THE LORD!"

Next door to her lived an atheist who would get so angry at her proclamations he would shout,

"There ain't no Lord!!"

Hard times set in on the elderly lady, and she prayed for GOD to send her some assistance.

She stood on her porch and shouted

"PRAISE THE LORD. GOD I NEED FOOD!! I AM HAVING A HARD TIME. PLEASE LORD, SEND ME

SOME GROCERIES!!"

The next morning the lady went out on her porch and noted a large bag of groceries and shouted,

"PRAISE THE LORD."

The neighbor jumped from behind a bush and said,

"Aha! I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries, God didn't."

The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and said,

"PRAISE THE LORD. He not only sent me groceries, but He made the devil pay for them.

Praise the Lord!"

(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:19:21 2011 No.3904078 yep, sounds like a realistic exchange between a rationalizer and a rationalist.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:20:21 2011 No.3904079 I always wonder about people that thank god for letting them survive a natural disaster. Do they ever think about all the people that didn't survive?

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:21:21 2011 No.3904084 You probably shouldn't be opening every random joke or chain email you receive, OP.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:21:21 2011 No.3904088 >>3904079 Obviously they were evil people who didn't pray enough and therefore deserved to be executed.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:24:21 2011 No.3904093 >>3904088 What a loving and forgiving god! Obviously, he is deserving of our praise and worship!

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:26:21 2011 No.3904096 File: 246 KB, 578x3689, trollgod trolling.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3904093 Indeed. Shall we invade their country, kill their men and rape their women as is mandated by the books of Law?

>>	sage Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:27:21 2011 No.3904099 File: 47 KB, 600x507, Christianity.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:28:21 2011 No.3904105 File: 92 KB, 576x747, real nihilist.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:31:21 2011 No.3904111 File: 74 KB, 642x1083, sci religion derp.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Idiots everywhere, I thought this was the smart board.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:32:21 2011 No.3904114 File: 35 KB, 450x450, religion.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:35:21 2011 No.3904122 >>3904111 It is. It's just, the smart ones stay quiet while the idiots speak.

>>

Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:46:21 2011 No.3904153

I was raised christian. In my mid teens I came to the conclusion that even if god exits, I do not want his love or whatever. As I have grown up I have known many self proclaimed christian girls and women, dated a few and "unforgivably sinned" with a couple. Some times I think that if there is a God, maybe I exist to temp the faithful, maybe I am incapable of believing in religion. Effectively a servant of Satan. In those moments I am glad, because if that is the case, at least Satan gives you a choice.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:47:21 2011 No.3904155 This reminds me of how people "PRAISE THE LORD!" when doctors save their lives.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:48:21 2011 No.3904162 >>3904155 Then Satan delivers the medical bill.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:49:21 2011 No.3904164 >>3904079 They should be asking themselves why god made them experience a natural disaster in the first place cause even if you don't die you're still probably fucked.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:52:21 2011 No.3904173 >>3904067 Cool story bro. BTW if Moot shuts down /sci/ like I've been hearing, assholes like YOU will be the cause of it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 01:55:21 2011 No.3904182 File: 26 KB, 244x320, 1276851638089.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] My grandma told me this joke when I was six about 15 years ago. I miss my grandma

>>	Anonymous Sat Oct 15 02:03:21 2011 No.3904208 >>3904155 Go through 10-hour operation with 50% chance of success. If the patient dies, it's the surgeon's fault. If the patient lives, PRAISE THE LORD.

>>	& !!tSqR6hj9NpI Sat Oct 15 02:04:21 2011 No.3904215 At least the mods are doing more about it now (Or at least not doing hidden bans as much). Give it a while and I'm sure this place can be cleaned up to the old standards of what it used to be.