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/sci/ - Science & Math

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11408551 No.11408551[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

I have an important scientific announcement to make.

>> No.11408564

>>11408551
Please go on, good sir, we are most patiently waiting for your ground-shaking announcement. We cannot wait to be enlightened by your announcement of new scientific advancements.

>> No.11408574

>>11408564
Hey sir, please let Dr. Pepe McPepe speak, it is probably about his research about jannies and African americans.

>> No.11408579

>>11408551
NOOOO, PLEASE DON'T SAY IT

>> No.11408584

First I wanted to thank all of you for being here tonight. It’s an honour to be among such distinguished scientists.

>> No.11408588
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11408588

>>11408551
well this promises to be enlightening
gather around my fellow brother, let us listen to our good friend

>> No.11408625

>>11408551
I'm listening.

>> No.11408630
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11408630

>> No.11408640

My team has completed a 5 year study backed by a multimillion dollar NSF grant. This team of dozens worked tirelessly to collect and analyze data, and we have come to some rather surprising conclusions...

>> No.11408647

>>11408640
*stops typing draft paper in TeX and closes labtop*

>> No.11408652
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11408652

>>11408640
g-go on...

>> No.11408662

Before we get into discussing the specifics of this study, we must mention our friends at CERN for giving us unparalleled access to the LHC. This provided vital in helping us complete our study. Also, on a personal note, I would like to thank my dear wife for her never ending love, support and patience during this trying period.

>> No.11408669

Now, without any further ago we will get into it. Oh, sorry just one more thing. I wanted to make sure all of you knew about the open bar. There isn't table service so you have to walk over and get your drinks. We also have an assortment of snacks in the room to the left, please feel free to help yourself.

>> No.11408674

>>11408551
>scientific
I'm highly interested.