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/sci/ - Science & Math


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10749090 No.10749090 [Reply] [Original]

Nurses are non-entities that are only good for carrying out doctors orders. Most are unable to act as even mediocre clinicians

>> No.10749223

>>10749090
>didn't check the catalogue
>cadduceus
>hates nurses

what a retard

>> No.10749244

>>10749223
There is no med general you dumb faggot

>> No.10749261

>>10749223
>t. Nurse

>> No.10749271
File: 10 KB, 250x221, 1545509287432s.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10749271

They make going to school again difficult if you're poor.

>> No.10749284

>>10749244
Was when I posted that, died just now. >>10742087

>> No.10749290

>>10749261
Nah, no need for me to hate nurses because in my country we didn't fall the mid-level practioner meme so nurses are not clinicians in any sense.

>> No.10749294

What are the big topics in medical research right now?

>> No.10749300

>>10749294
All is vanity and vexation of spirit.

>> No.10749302

>>10749090
>couldn’t even bother to copy the OP

Jesus, that’s a new low.

>> No.10749305

>>10749294
ml, genomics, antibodies

>> No.10749323

>tfw no 90 IQ nurse gf with shitty tattoos who sells pyramid scheme tea

>> No.10749356

>>10749284
T. Murse

>> No.10749366

>>10749294
applying undergraduate statistics to medical practice

>> No.10749850

All medical students should be given a nurse waifu to look after them

>> No.10750177
File: 642 KB, 1418x729, normal simus, torsades, v.fib.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10750177

>9 y/o kid goes into tachycardia, torsades and v.fib by chance when hooked to holter
Kid survived, but damn good timing for the holter to catch it all.

>> No.10750186

>>10749090
Physicians are non-entities that are only good for carrying out procedures designed by biomedical engineers, pharmaceuticals researchers, and biologists

>> No.10750256

>>10750186
Yeah I mean that's an interesting thought experiment, but ER physicians absolutely do think on the fly all the time, and rely on their non-thinking drones (AKA Nurses) to follow out their orders without thinking

>> No.10750259

>>10750177
Why was a 9 year old on a Holter?

>> No.10750292

>>10750177
What was the reason?

HOCM? Brugada? WPW?

>> No.10750306

>>10750256
ER room and trauma room doctors are a minority of doctors probably comparable to the proportion of nurses that encounter situations where they need to make important/risky judgements though.

>> No.10750312

You faggots left the other thread die???

>> No.10750352

>>10750312
This is the standard of care these days.

>> No.10750363

>>10750312
OP let it by not putting /med/ in it

>> No.10750368 [DELETED] 

>>10750256
We need Millitary rank structure to be honest. Doctors being officers, nurses being enlisted

>> No.10750392

>>10750352
Kek'd.

>>10750363
True, but this OP forgot the actual /med/ format, we'll have people ask for >best spec for research? and >best spec lifestyle-wise?

>> No.10750393

>>10749850
no you shouldn’t

>> No.10750397
File: 150 KB, 293x341, that feel when wearing nothing at all.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10750397

>yfw no nurse gf to feel weak in your presence

>> No.10750401

>>10750393
why not?

>> No.10750403

>complain that people should go to the doctor more often
>if they go to the doctor, their bill is split into six thousand parts and only the first is covered by insurance

doctors, please explain. we want your services but this shit is punishment. so many people would literally rather die than deal with this.

>> No.10750418

>>10750259
>>10750292
It's from a case study about a kid with LEOPARD syndrome who had the holter prescribed for routine follow up with cardiology. Kid was known to have septal hypertrophy. Lucky kiddo went from a GCS of 3 with posturing to having no neurological deficit when he eventually recovered.
I'm doing a paper on the benefits of rapid CPR initiation, adequate CPR, neurological outcomes and other BLS/ACLS cases, and this caught my eye.

>> No.10750468

>>10750403
It's simple. Have a yearly blood work and a full body CAT Scan at 5 years distance. It's that simple, we do our jobs and make sure you're not suffering from something you didn't know you have because in medicine, both doctors and patients, hate surprises.

>> No.10750605

>>10749090
Where are you from OP? Student nurse here, I respect doctors very much and I wonder where it is you practice?

>> No.10750614

>>10749323
Oh man that is 15% accurate, gg

>> No.10750717

What happened to the schizo who thought he was getting poisoned by his neighbor?

>> No.10750779

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dNRtp3suXxc
So is SLE the worst chronic disease you can get?

>> No.10750846

>>10750177
>>10750418
Shiet, hadn't heard about this. Google'd it. >200 cases
>>10750779
Every chronic desease is shit imo. It's just that lupus can attack multiple organs.

>> No.10750849

IMbro keep us updated on the gypsy with the lung formations.

Also OP hasn't seen cool nurses.

>> No.10750873

>>10750468
Wew lad this is a pretty bad idea. Lab routine i could understand but ct? Amerilard approach.

>> No.10750882

>>10750403
Stop being amerigan :DDDD

>> No.10750980

>>10750873
What's so bad about one CT at 5 years distance? Radiation dose goes away in time.

>> No.10751025

>>10749090
Lmaoo so salty, did you get rejected by some nurse you tried to hit on?

>> No.10751029

>>10750980
>Radiation dose goes away in time.

No. Radiation dose is compounding throughout life. It takes one event to cause cancer. The "wait period" associated with radiation as an occupational exposure is to not go past a certain dose in a given year. So if a worker reaches the limit of radiation for a given time period, they must not get any additional dosing until the next time period begins.

>> No.10751030

Can't wait until doctors get automated desu. Not only are they bad at their jobs, but med school also selects for narcissistic assholes that don't care about their patients.

>> No.10751050

>>10751029
Well shit, you're right. Sorry, then. I guess CTs should be done once every 10 years, I guess?

>> No.10751065

>>10751050
Problem is that you are still needless exposing the body to excess radiation which may cause the cancer you are trying to prevent.

It doesn't hurt to have a baseline of what your body normally looks like, but getting a CT every so often is probably not the way to go. It'd be nice if there was a system once people turn 18 they got an MRI or ultrasound of major organs, but this will never really happen because healthcare is based on prevention where the test is good at finding disease. Problem is most people are healthy until they are not. Knowing the exact point of health decline can be difficult simply because we don't feel the same every day and there are so many external factors in defining health.

>> No.10751069

>>10751030
not happening anytime soon

>> No.10751073

>>10750873
Yup, the CT is bad idea. Bad use of a valuable resource, the probability of finding something is extremely low and the risks from the radiation far outweigh any use it might have.

Even the lab work is borderline useful, checkups in general are not worth it for healthy adults. Sure you can hit it up to insurance, but here we work with the taxpayers money and have to weigh benefits and costs.

>> No.10751203

What causes constant pelvic floor muscle twitches dont @ me with meme replies

>> No.10751239

>>10751203
the muscles are too tight or too loose

>> No.10751643

Leaf first year chem student here, obviously a /premed/, I've been volunteering with the federal police for two years now and became a clinical research assistant at a local hospital about a month ago. I've been working on some oncology projects. I also help run a college Airsoft club. Any advice y'all can give me as to how I can further differentiate my application from all the other premeds?

>> No.10751713
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10751713

>>10751643

>> No.10751727

>>10751713
huuts ylis on the speed again

>> No.10751731
File: 2.37 MB, 3264x2448, 15613916953768999434229329566556.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10751731

It's been a week since I pulled a tick from here. It's not healing properly, I think the head broke off. What do and am I dying? I've been getting a lot of nose bleeds but I think it's just the dry air

>> No.10751814

>if the initial presenting rhythm in cardiac arrest is asystole, the patient should be immediately defibrillated

Prove me wrong, you literally can’t

>> No.10751821

I've regularly bled from my ass for the past 8 years, from spotting to heavy bleeding. No doctor has given me any real answers to this.
>Change diet
Did it
>Drink water
Did it
>Eat soft foods
Did it

It's bright red blood, no I don't have pebble shits, I don't smoke, I don't drink, I don't do anal. I've had a couple fingers up my ass and no real answers. Help an anon out.

>> No.10751854

>>10751731
nigger go see real doctors

>> No.10751873

>>10751854
The whole affected area is smaller than my pinkie nail, I'm not going to go to the doctor and spend 200 bucks to be told "Nah you're good, just put this 50 dollar cream on it"
Why else would I ask strangers on the internet anon? Medicine cost to fucking much for poor people. A doctor visit is a weeks worth of work for me.

>> No.10752015

>>10751030
We're here to stay and you'll have to deal with it :^)

>> No.10752035

>>10751821
Look, this is from a student so take it with a grain of salt, but...try fasting. You shit every day, right? Try not shitting for 3 and see if it heals.
It's the asshole itself that's bleeding, right? Not just bloody stool? You need to make sure It's not a bleed from further up inside you.

>> No.10752048

>>10751821
hemorrhoids

>> No.10752077

>>10752035
I sometimes am regular, sometimes I'm not.
Not taking a shit for a couple days normally leads to my ass feeling like it's tearing open and sometimes I bleed, sometimes I don't. Always uncomfortable though. I've experimented by myself doing multiple minor changes, it comes and goes at a whim with no rhyme or reason. The only thing that I know is that it will always feel a strange and certain way, but even then it's not a guarantee for a bleed, and after that for at least a week or so I won't feel that strange feeling, but will notice spots of blood until it stops.
>>10752048
Docs have said no hemorrhoids.

>> No.10752147

>>10750717
Murdered by the shoe spray mafia may he RIP in pastrami

>> No.10752148

Nurse Practioner with 10 years of ED experience > A MD with 0 years of experience.

>> No.10752150

>>10751731
I’d like to know more about your symptoms. First of all, how often are you farting.

>> No.10752155

>>10752148
How do they compare with the same amount of training?

>> No.10752212

>>10752155
I'd probably default to the MD. That said, from experience, not all doctors are equal. I work as a paramedic in an ugent care center, there is one doctor who has often misdiagnosed/misinterpreted cardiac rhythms (no, those are not p waves Dr. Khuc). If they they're a general practicioner but they don't work in an actual hospital I'd be wary.

>> No.10752217

>>10751731
you fucked up
rubbing it gently with vegetable/sunflower oil for few minutes convinces it to pull out completely.
also the place will be soar for the next week even if the tick was there for short time if it got out intact.

>> No.10752257

>>10752217
Normally I get a good pinch, yank, and burn em after. Just happened to be a day where I had 6 of the fucking things on me and I wanted them off.
Also it's not sore, it's tender if I poke it but doesn't itch or anything. But having a skin ulcer isn't a fun thing.

>> No.10752324

>>10751821
Try colonoscopy

>> No.10752328

>>10752212
>probably default to an MD
No shit. They are better educated, have longer training, and are on average more intelligent (because of the higher barrier to entry) than NPs. NPs are fine but let’s not fuck around.

>> No.10752365

>>10752328
Remember anon, the mean does not define the whole. At my urgent care center one doctor received his degree in Mexico, the other a Caribbean school with a checkered history. What do you call a medical student with a C- average who passed the MCAT barely? Doctor. Many are proficient at regurgitating medical knowledge but are unable to apply it critically. Many fall out of practice.

>> No.10752370

>>10752365

Obviously, I wasn’t arguing and wouldn’t argue that the shittest MD > best NP. But on average it’s a no brainier, and ‘probably defaulting’ to an MD doesn’t do justice to the difference between the average MD and NP.

>> No.10752387

>>10752365
Reminder that it’s probably easier to study for the NCLEX than for the MCAT.

>> No.10752633

>>10749290
>because in my country

we get it. rummania, where the blood flows in the streets and electricity is on 2.3 hours a day! now back into your cave and finish gnawing on your bone.

>> No.10752640

>>10749090
I'm curious, how pozzed is pharmacy?

>> No.10752642

>>10752633
fuck off premed

>> No.10752651

>>10749090
>>10749261
>>10749356
>>10749850
>>10750256

couldn't get into nursing school, scribes, nurses won't even look at him,

>>10751025

worse, rejected by the ADN program for being a literal retard no one likes


>>10750605
let the aspies have their little anonymous corner of the internets. it's all they have.

>>10752387

try it. you'll fail HARD

>> No.10752654

>>10752642
Leave him alone. Premeds are above Romania name dropper in the /med/ hierarchy

>> No.10752656

>>10752642

stop biting people's necks, lugash

>> No.10752664

>>10752651
Oh look, it’s the eternally butthurt n*rsing white knight. You can spot her because she never capitalises the first letter of her sentences; a crime that would never be committed by a medical student or doctor.

>> No.10752672

>>10752664

oh look it's the dipshit prelaw, pre-nursing, premed, fuck what-do-i-do-now loser that is constantly posting anti-nursing threads on a subsection pretending to be scientific yet infested with underaged nasty loser minority fucks that no one would talk to in real life. but hey, syntax dude! i win the argument because words aren't capitalized.

fuck off aspie bitch

>> No.10752677

>>10752664

Let me help you see the future. The initials 'RN" or "MD" will not be after your name. Have fun on 4chan.

>> No.10752688

>>10752672
Actually, n*rse, I’m a medical student. I got in first time, because I’m much more intelligent than you.

Also, capitalisation has nothing to do with syntax. I know this because I’m much more intelligent than you.

But, please keep coming here and crying because of your inferiority. We all thoroughly enjoy sneering at you.

>> No.10752691

>>10752677
>samefagging

I’m just proud that you learned when to use capital letters. Good girl. Now go wipe an old man’s arse for me, n*rse.

>> No.10752697

>>10752688
>>10752691
wow such cope. you're pathetic and last thing you are is admitted to medical school. maybe some third world shithole where you dissect monkeys.

>> No.10752699

>>10752688

Dude your posts are just sad

>> No.10752703

>>10752688
Damn, you're actually an idiot.

>> No.10752704

>>10752691

do what? people are calling you out as the fucking poser choad that you are. it's a bitch no nurse wants to fuck you or you took your shot and got utterly slammed lol

>> No.10752712

>>10752688
>capitalisation

Fucking Europeon. Opinion discarded.

>> No.10752718
File: 9 KB, 217x232, soy.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10752718

>Actually, n*rse, I’m a medical student. I got in first time, because I’m much more intelligent than you.

>Also, capitalisation has nothing to do with syntax. I know this because I’m much more intelligent than you.

>But, please keep coming here and crying because of your inferiority. We all thoroughly enjoy sneering at you.

>> No.10752727

>>10752718

best part was, all it took was one sentence for it to reveal itself which is presently scheming on the best ultimate totally rad burn sickest burn you've even seen on the chans... wait you'll see. then you guys will call me cool. right?

>> No.10752732

PA's should honestly be given rights to at least have equal status as general practitioners. Fact is full on doctorhood only exists due to lobbying not ant inherently special quality that justify the MD quotas. Same with nurses and pharmies.

>> No.10752740

>>10752732

lobbyists fuck up healthcare. PAs and NPs both hate the AMA and it's efforts.

>> No.10752820

>>10752688
Please consider another field man, nobody deserves the abysmal patient care you would provide

>> No.10752895

>>10752820

don't you wish this board had IDs like other ones so we could identify the straight-up losers like this m*dical student and his w*ird postings?

>> No.10752896

Help I have a lump in my neck it is hard feeling and doesn't really move. I am scared it is cancer I don't want to die please help.

>> No.10752941
File: 71 KB, 960x720, 1554637401667.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10752941

Where can I find the most accurate salaries for doctors? I've been googling and the salaries are all over the place.

>> No.10753046

>>10752896
Should I see a doctor? The problem is I am getting a new job and I won't have coverage except my mom's plan which is out of the state I am moving too. I am scared because it isn't painful and I have not been sick it just came out of nowhere it sounds like lymphoma...

>> No.10753049

>>10750186
I'm pretty sure surgeons come up with surgical procedures.

>> No.10753291

>>10752732
Lol @ thinking you’re the same as a doctor by being a PA...are you gonna tell me NP’s should be able to open their own practices next? Could you imagine? Nurses LARPing as doctors? There would be bodies in the streets, most nurses can’t perform the most absolute basic assessment, they are morons

>> No.10753308

>>10752651
Lol...classic n*rse posting...
At the hospital I’m doing residency the ER doctors even think higher of the paramedics than the n*rses...with the medics they at least pay attention to pass on, with n*rses they just blow them off, it’s embarassing to watch

>> No.10753316

Fastest medical student ever.

>>10752688
>06/24/19(Mon)15:47:53 No.10752688
>Actually, n*rse, I’m a medical student

>>10753308
>06/24/19(Mon)19:35:13 No.10753308▶
>>10752651
>Lol...classic n*rse posting...
> At the hospital I’m doing residency the ER docto

Look /sci/, it's been interesting seeing the occasional esoteric thread or chirping in on some material to which I am familiar but it's rather clear this board is infected with young, autistic, delusional, inexperienced, and frankly, retarded science majors. Some of you might be real but I'd wager most aren't and this guy I've linked here is someone you never, ever want to imitate even on an anonymous Japanese anime imageboard.

It's beyond pathetic and an example of the kind of poser behavior behind the alleged prestige of working in the medical field. Good luck.

>> No.10753323

>>10753291

the only moron here is you ching chang premed

>>10753291
>are you gonna tell me NP’s should be able to open their own practices

FNPs have autonomous practice in numerous states with excellent outcomes. You really are a pathetic fuckup. Sit down and shut the fuck up.

>> No.10753429

>>10753316
>>10753323
>t. nurse
No one cares what a male nurse thinks you cuck, now go clean room 14

>> No.10753444

>>10753429

so what is this thing's problem?

>> No.10753655

Quite upsetting to see all the trash talking of nurses. Where I’m from as a nurse your biggest job is noticing Dr’s mistakes and often save patients lives on Dr error or lack of care. It’s a team effort bois

>> No.10753866

>>10753655
Don't mind the premeds, their frustration is trough the roof.

>> No.10754442

>>10749090
>mfw Physical Therapy
>young guy, metastatic cancer, had huge chunks of thoracic spine removed, fused his entire thoracic spine, heart rate high at rest because surgeon probably fucked his vague nerve, complete rhizotomy of spinal nerves T6, T7 because apparently nerves were in the way of the surgeons tools
>thought he would never walk again
>I walk in, hey bro wanna walk?
>nah I’m fucked man
>convince him for a few minutes
>he walks, immediately starts improving
>he’s eating again today

Feels good, bros. Physical Therapy pay is lower but the job is damn rewarding.

>> No.10754444

>>10754442
Good for you anon! Satisfaction is everywhere in medicine, glad your patient is getting better.

>> No.10754475
File: 83 KB, 957x621, 1561062890860.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10754475

>>10749223
Cope harder pal

>> No.10754706

>>10753655
>Where I’m from as a nurse your biggest job is noticing Dr’s mistakes and often save patients lives on Dr error or lack of care.

Oh come off it. Let’s stop pretending nurses are the secret heroes of the hospital who are constantly cleaning up after the clumsy doctors.

Nurses are essential, but let’s stop the pandering.

>> No.10754730

>>10754706
Just saying it’s part of our job as we take the wrap for carrying out incorrect orders by Dr. certainly don’t mean to offend if I had more $$$ I would’ve gone to med school opposed to nursing, no disrespect intended pal

>> No.10754887
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10754887

It's somewhat funny that people act like becoming a doctor is hard. The hardest part of medical school was getting in. The material is all easy, there's just a ton of it. The work we do pales in comparison to the shit other people in the medical field have to deal with.

I simply walk into a room, examine the patient, talk to them, report to my attending, and write my note. But a nurse? They have to bathe the patient, wipe the patient, make sure they have the food they need, help them get to the bathroom, etc.

Know what I don't want to do? Anything a fucking nurse does, cause I couldn't handle doing it. The actual job in nursing is far harder than being a doctor.

>> No.10754900

>tfw no palliative care gf to euthanize me

>> No.10754908

>tfw no IM gf to become all internal with me

>> No.10754913

>>10754887
Nursing is usually more physically gruelling, sure. Doctors’ jobs are more demanding in other ways though: more responsibility, less support, more risk, longer working hours, *far* more difficult decisions to be made, having to be a leader, etc.

Also, it’s hardly surprising that doctors have the more desirable job given that, in general, brighter and better educated people usually end up with the better jobs. I wouldn’t want to be a nurse either, because it’s beneath me and just about everyone else who has the talent for medical school. I’m sure it’s rewarding for the average person, though.

>> No.10754953

>>10751069
90% of doctors role could be given to nurses and other specialists. Only surgeons are needed. General practioners are glorified nurses.

>> No.10754955
File: 56 KB, 309x374, 1369450713759.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10754955

>>10754953
>GPs are glorified nurses
BIG YIKES

>> No.10754964
File: 52 KB, 420x294, 850633e8965e3359f3cd879b9e5804cb.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10754964

Damn... Really makes you think.

>> No.10754966

My fiancee got into med school and dropped out second year with a good GPA because it was simply too much work. After she did some placements and saw the reality of being a doctor. Has an IQ of 127.
I'm still very disappointed. I tried to convince to grind through it, but she didn't want to. She hates her job as nurse as well. Planning to quit and open a clinic for non-surgical cosmetic procedures.

>> No.10754968

>>10754964
Damn, this is deep.

>> No.10754974

>>10754966
And to make things worse, her employer paid for her to do a masters in management.

>> No.10754981
File: 23 KB, 300x300, TIMESAND___bmciue2yr78n4fhxzzwaa1oprf3dfcecyhwdgr2689nmkxfjpp002r2x3rvbgnvbjdmuloulupupohgexerzwqwasgf73i0.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10754981

>>10754955
DOs are tards that couldn't get into real medical school

>> No.10754988
File: 6 KB, 250x147, soy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10754988

>>10754981
>DOs are tards that couldn't get into real medical school

Fixed the image

>> No.10755019
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10755019

>>10754988
nice

Pic related basedboy: it's Chris Moriarty the son of the Director of the FBI

>> No.10755022

>>10755019
the government actually disabled him from posting due to him causing too much sedition from his correct and rigorous papers. such a shame censorship still exists on this asian coalition communication board

>> No.10755030
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10755030

Let’s hear it for nurses! Hip hip...

>> No.10755034

>>10755030
Why do first year med students on 4chan hate nurses so much?

>> No.10755043

>>10755022
>the government actually disabled him from posting due
That's gay. I'm going to disable them from having children that don't get tortured to death.

>> No.10755053

>>10755022
What can I do avoid this censorship while I'm waiting to brutally defile everyone who implements this censorship on me?

>> No.10755065
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10755065

>>10755022
Know this... everyone even tangentially involved in suppressing my word, the Word of God, is going to see all their love brutally defiled before I give them to someone who will do far worse things to them than I would ever imagine.

>> No.10755067

>>10755034
>first year med students
premeds*, anon.

>> No.10755072
File: 185 KB, 642x597, TIMESAND___m1940cdvwgeg9c8gnjruif76bwhxuenehycu98e7s64dojfioefj93252.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755072

I hope you have children, you censors, and that you tell yourself you love them. If you block my post, I will defile them before I kill them.

>> No.10755075
File: 85 KB, 750x960, 09efb054dc8d090e8580ea721d009d03.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755075

Premeds will deny this, but it's true

>> No.10755084
File: 58 KB, 551x661, TRINITY___NotTooHappy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755084

You censor the Word of God at the cost of your immortal soul. I will totally destroy you. I will totally destroy your family, with malice, if you hide the Word of God from those who would see it. I will fucking wreck you, you disgusting pieces of shit.

>> No.10755089

>>10755067
>i..it’s only dumb premeds that aren’t impressed by nurses! med students and doctors think we’re the backbone of the hospital!

>> No.10755102
File: 46 KB, 360x522, that's real fucking fascinating; please, come closer and rape me more.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755102

>>10755089
I'm a med student myself, dickhead. I got no problem with nurses, can't see yours either.

>t-that nurse scum t-told me to wipe the floor because I'm too big of an idiot and made a mess putting in an IV, she was wrong r-right ma?

This is how you sound, faggot.

>> No.10755108

>>10754974

nursing management and the masters degree to become one. the cranial vault parabellum method is more efficient.

>> No.10755109
File: 54 KB, 720x418, ameriga.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755109

>>10752633
binland actually

>> No.10755112

>>10755109
>bluz dib
I'm dying, kek.

>> No.10755113

>>10755030

only ones that wear this bullshit are in tedious chronic care units where morale is in the shit the patient just threw on the floor. that and rookies.

>> No.10755114

>>10752941
>doctor
>salary
LMAO

>> No.10755120

>>10754966
>IQ of 127
OH NO NO NO

t. triple nine gang

>> No.10755124

>>10755109

NHS gov'nah? Right, Dr. Poo will be in shartly to see ya, right-o! Been a doctor for 11 yers n makes less than the 'ed nurse dontchaknow. Did his residency at Sag Paneer. Think ya fuck'd now, don't ya?

>> No.10755125

>>10755124
wtf? Let me spell it out for you; F-I-N-L-A-N-D.

>> No.10755127

I currently work at a hospital lab where my entire job, like literally all of it waiting for nurses and Drs. To fuck up just so I can fix it. I make $20 an hour to literally watch YouTube and babysit people with actual medical degrees.

>> No.10755136

>>10755127
>tfw you make 400$ a hour for being watched over by nurses and technicians

>> No.10755138

>>10755125

binland usually means bin the kniofe m80

then agdan, u r dockter der and Finn nod much else I can say to insult you :DDDDD

>> No.10755140

>>10755136
> tfw login in to Navient and cry

>> No.10755142
File: 157 KB, 555x333, fcwGS0c.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755142

>>10755109
Fuggggggg

>> No.10755144

>>10751731
Do you have any pain? Do you have a fever? Muscle sores? Doesn't look great, but not terrible either.
>>10751821
Rhoids or fissure, but fissure is painful so I'm guessing rhoids.
>>10752217
Wrong. It suffocates and it might regurgitate it's intestinal juices or endolymph or whatever it's called. If it's contaminated with some infectious agent - you're fucked.
>>10752896
>>10753046
A little delay won't be this bad for cancer, but I'd advice to get it checked out ASAP. Might be benign we can't say without palpating it.
>>10753655
>It’s a team effort bois
That's what these fucks can't understand. Nurses can do shit if they're not retarded. But this applies fucking everywhere.
>>10754442
Nice.

>> No.10755146

>>10755136
Don't worry, when you and your team of bimbos forget to release your orders or forget to sign them and your patient needs a Trop value because they're having a heart attack I'll save your ass.

>> No.10755154

>>10755127
Come on m8, I'm a labfag too and that's bullshit. There's the occasional doctor who screws up an order and n*rses who don't know how to draw blood but I wouldn't say fixing fuckups is a major part of my job.
Also
>20 an hour
Cringe, move somewhere where you get a decent wage

>> No.10755161

>>10755138
For me it's ebin. I think it depends on the board a lot.

>> No.10755170
File: 442 KB, 1440x2560, Screenshot_20190625-071615_YouTube.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755170

>>10755154
No literally, it's my entire job. You think I'm kidding. I spent 37 hours in the past week watching YouTube. For example last night we had a Dr. Go in and change orders on a cell count stating it was drawn from the Ankle L. When in reality it was taken from Knee L. Ortho team called me freaking out because the pt. Was getting surgery based on the results and they needed it to say Knee L or day surgery wouldn't know where to operate. There wasn't a single Dr. Or RN on the floor that could figure out how to change a source in EPIC bevause every single one of them is dull as shit. My entire job consists of stuff like that.

>> No.10755187

>>10755170
Damn, you must work at some tiny rural hospital staffed with dumbass hicks.

>> No.10755207

Anyone here familiar with Therapeutic Anti-Bodies? Are they a well established treatment for chronic diseases? I'm going to be starting a medication that got FDA approval recently. If it does what the company claims it will. My life will be significantly changed for the better. It just sounds too good to be true. I've had so many disappointments with other medications in the past. This one is something that works completely differently than the treatments I'm accustomed to.

>> No.10755209

>>10755187
I work at the largest hosptial in the state. It's a trauma 1. It's the reason they have a position like mine, we had 18 traumas and 28 people present themselves to the ED last night and it was just a Monday night. People make mistakes and it doesn't help that we're a training hospital and Spring semester just ended so all the new RNs are starting. I like what I do, sure I'm not rich nor am I part of the care team, but I get to fuck around all night yet still have an impact on patient care and be the catch all that could save someone's life.

>> No.10755218

>>10755207
They are a real thing, fucking expensive usually though.

>> No.10755225

>>10755075
Seems like whoever made this failed anatomy 101

>> No.10755287

>>10755225

bro everyone knows cardiac activity starts in the coronary sinus and transmits laterally. that and the waveform is very high or no amplitude as seen with 45 degree angle deflections. also, that heart is just adorable and exactly how it looks in the chest. you clearly weren't paying attention

>> No.10755290

stupid fag OP

>> No.10755303

>>10755287
kek

>> No.10755347

>>10755290
The truth hurts, doesn’t it? Now, go clean the vomit off my patient.

>> No.10755361

>>10755347
>my patient
Not him dude, but at this point, it's not even funny and you're just an obnoxious little faggot.

t. med student

>> No.10755412

>>10749090
>Remove all nurses from hospital
>Suddenly doctors have to do nurses work and have no time to do doctoring
>People die
Turns out you need nurses after all

>> No.10755451

ER/OR tech here. The residents have taken over. Why bother trying to make them learn how to put in NG tubes, IVs, foley catheters, and other shit when once they become doctors those tasks are delegated to me or a nurse? I even had one doctor call me to teach his residents how to work the suction machine cause he admitted that he never had to use one in years. The only skills and tasks I see them needing to learn are those specific to physicians and RSI. Everything else can be handed off to another non-doctor staff member, like me.

>> No.10755460

>>10755451
>teaching that basic bitch shit to fucking RESIDENTS

lmao at the complete failure of medical education

>> No.10755477

>>10755460
This is America too, I'm in New England. Tell me though, does it depend on the med school or hospital where they're doing residency? A couple of my MD pals tell me no, they didn't need to do that, while others say yes, they did.

>> No.10755497

>>10753049
Physician generally doesn't refer to surgeons

>> No.10755511

>>10755497
But surgeons get the ideas and they have the experience to come up with new procedures.

>> No.10755517

>>10755412
>Remove all janitors from hospital
>Suddenly doctors and nurses have to do janitors work and have no time to do doctoring and nursing
>People die
Damn... I guess janitors are just as smart as doctors

>> No.10755537

>>10755517
Comparing apples with oranges just like the anon you replied did. Everybody has its job in the hospital, doctors, nurses, janitors, porters, techs, lab fags, everybody has its own place and job to do so there's no comparison.

>> No.10755575

>>10755537
Exactly. Everyone plays a different role. The nurses wipe up shit, gossip, and bore patients to death with inane chat, and the doctors make all the big decisions, lead the clinical teams, and get all the glory.

>> No.10755607

>>10755575
So deluded, kek. Please refrain from posting, premed

>> No.10755688

>>10755511
In the original post I did not mention surgeons, I only said physicians. I agree with you that surgeons have some more significant research/innovation contributions

>> No.10755694

>>10755688
Surgeons are physicians, you know?

>> No.10755719

>>10755607
>premed

I’m a medical student. Sorry shit-wiper.

>> No.10755739

>>10755719
I'm a medical student too. I really hope you won't become a doctor with that attitude, man. Being edgy like you are right now, it's not okay. Learn to stop talking bullshit and become disciplined.

>> No.10755773

>>10755739
Taking a medical terminology class at community college doesn't make you a medical student, sis.

>> No.10755804
File: 40 KB, 704x480, implying.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755804

>>10755773
First off, stop projecting.

Second, with that kind of character, you'll end up 1.Dropping out, 2.Become a shitty doctor. This comes from a med student that you think is a nurse just because I disagree with you. Before becoming disciplined, you should learn how to behave and know your place, so far you're behind nurses both in knowledge and training.

>> No.10755808

>>10755804
I'm PGY3. Stay mad.

>> No.10755809
File: 72 KB, 164x233, 1361071267474.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755809

>>10755808
>said earlier he's a medical student
>I'm PGY-3
?????????

>> No.10755841
File: 360 KB, 600x580, pepe-transparent-laugh-1.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755841

>>10755809
>she thinks everyone who disagrees with her is the same person

>> No.10755844

Fuck, I get tremors now everytime I go to bed at night

>> No.10755851

>>10752688
Imagine being this much of a fucking retard.

>> No.10755899
File: 14 KB, 501x383, your face when attempting to get on my level.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755899

>>10755841
>imagine projecting so hard
pic rel is you

>> No.10755964
File: 676 KB, 637x669, paper_tiger_by_contraomnes.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10755964

How do I get a /med/ gf? whether she is a nurse, in med school, or a doctor. i am doing a phd atm

>> No.10755975

What do you guys think of biologists?

>> No.10756015

>>10755964
Don't. She'll be miserable from being overworked and all she'll talk about is gross and depressing medical shit.

>> No.10756020

>>10755975
They're okay. Their theoretical knowledge is pretty useless, but those niggas know their way around a lab.

>>10755964
A PhD in what?

>> No.10756022

>>10756020
I meant biology PhDs by the way, not medical biologists/pathologists.
Asking because I'm considering that instead of an MD since I'm mainly interested in neuro research (lab and clinical) and I truly don't care about treating patients.

>> No.10756038

>>10756020
physics, i work with lasers n shieet

>> No.10756040

>>10755851
The truth hurts, doesn’t it? Nurses are nobodies. Get over it.

>> No.10756065

>>10756038
That'll do. Get in to some medical research project, be ripped and appear intelligent.

>> No.10756074

>>10756022
I was talking about researchers too. If you can deal with the workload an MD+PhD combo beats a PhD every time.

>> No.10756084

>tfw young nurses keep flirting with me
>Makes my attending seethe

>> No.10756090

Pure biology is for brainlets, biochem (molecular shit) and biophysics is respectable.

>> No.10756113
File: 645 KB, 3264x2448, BB950459-5683-45BB-BE6B-D2D70A8EF594.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10756113

>>10749090
I really need an opinion on this, it hasn’t healed very well

I’m very concerned /med/

>> No.10756145

>>10755964
I’ll be your gf anon :)

>> No.10756173

>>10756145
are you a female or a female (male)?

>> No.10756284

>>10756173
Biologically female

>> No.10756289 [DELETED] 
File: 842 KB, 2801x2202, clamp.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10756289

>>10749090
Here in the US, they clamped our umbilical cords early.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/30473033
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/30278462
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/30193752
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/30598672
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/29101631
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/30208504

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/27654493

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/30355293

>*Clamp*
:^)
:^)
:^)
:^)

>> No.10756298

>>10755804
Misato and Kaji were not clamped.

>> No.10756332

>>10756173
Does it matter :)

>> No.10756357

>>10756298
Shinji was clamped

>> No.10756362

premed here, oxford or harvard?

>> No.10756383

>>10756289
>they clamped our umbilical cords early

They still do it swettie ;^)

>> No.10756384

>>10756332
Don’t larp as me anon

>> No.10756415
File: 479 KB, 1920x974, Ebola chan.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10756415

Now, real doc here.

/ebola/ general
What do you guys think? This is the last report (24/06):
>Since the beginning of the epidemic, the cumulative number of cases is 2247, of which 2153 confirmed and 94 probable. In total, there were 1510 deaths (1416 confirmed and 94 probable) and 623 people cured.
>269 suspected cases under investigation.
>8 new confirmed cases, including 3 in Mabalako [North Kivu], 2 in Beni [North Kivu], 1 in Komanda [Ituri], 1 in Biena [North Kivu], and 1 in Musienene [North Kivu].
>4 new deaths of confirmed cases, including 1 community death at Biena; 3 ETC deaths -- 2 in Beni and 1 in Mabalako.
>2 new recoveries released from ETCs -- 1 in Beni and 1 in Butembo [North Kivu].

NEW INFO:

- Two response teams were attacked in Beni [North Kivu]. One is a vaccination team that was attacked in the Tamende health area and the other, a psychosocial support team in the Madrandelle health area, while they were both in full activity. They were attacked by young people, including bikers following the death of their friend, a young boy who died on Monday. This young person has a twin brother, who is also a confirmed Ebola case and is currently in treatment at the ETC. It should be noted that these 2 health areas have reported several cases of Ebola in recent weeks. From these attacks, there is a report of 2 wounded policemen who were transferred to the Beni General Referral Hospital and a burned vehicle.

- The coordinator of Beni's response, Dr Gaston Tshapenda, said that an intermediary between the coordination and this community has already been delegated to meet the people of these 2 countries, especially the young people with a view to finding a compromise to bring back the situation calm. "Right now, it is hard to work. All the teams are waiting and working in slow motion, while there are alerts here and there," he pleaded, adding that the security situation is calm and that the teams are acting with caution.

WHEN IS THIS SHITSHOW GONNA END??

>> No.10756416

>>10755964
I want a PhD bf. Gimme.

>> No.10756555

>>10749223
>>10749090
romanians aren't white

>> No.10756581

>>10756357
Shinji may well have been clamped.

>>10756383
>Small helpless infant comes out
>It's little heart beating away at 200 bpm.
>Its umbilical cord pulsating away, transferring its life blood
>Many new sounds and sensations bombard the infant.
....
...
...
>clamp
:^)
:^)
:^)

There you go kiddo, good luck in life. :^)

>> No.10756590

>>10756415
Ebola can probably be cured with intravenous sodium ascorbate. Worked for polio and snake venom.

>> No.10756626
File: 644 KB, 1494x1672, Foster_Bible_Pictures_0074-1_Offering_to_Molech.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10756626

Alright resident Anon, it's been 20 seconds. Put on the clamp.

Wat do?

>> No.10756680

>>10755809

it's senior chief medical student to you, student doctor medicine, attending sir!

>> No.10756686

>>10756626

drop the baby. start the pit drip. give mag. discharge pt.

>> No.10756881
File: 130 KB, 1000x955, 3jYiZKT.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10756881

fuck nurses

>> No.10756905

>>10756626
get that thing its shots before it kills everyone

>> No.10756999

>>10756881
I will. Right after I get done clamping these umbilical cords.
>:^)

>> No.10757004

>>10756999
i wish i had a nurse gf to "clamp" my "cord" if you know what i mean

>> No.10757038
File: 54 KB, 1441x314, sdaxxx.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757038

Step aside virgins, big dick professor coming through

>> No.10757039

>>10757038
Cringe

>> No.10757044

>>10749261
Yep nurse is the new job for brain dead roasties.

>> No.10757069

>>10757044
have sex

>> No.10757083

>>10757069
Quit stealing benzos from ER and get your HPV looked at barren hag.

>> No.10757095

>>10757044
As a nurse, most nurses are like that, yeah

>> No.10757108

>>10757069
I would like to do that.

>> No.10757118

>>10757108
Do you have a peer-reviewed source for that statement?

>> No.10757124

>>10757118
I do not... my paper was rejected in peer review.
;(

>> No.10757187

It's weird how cringe premed and med students are, this whole thread is just a weird circle jerk of either 1st/2nd year med students feeling holier than thou that they got into med school or just frustrated premeds.

also can medicine stop with the love the patient emotional bullshit? I swear feels like I have to end every patient encounter with sucking their dick. I do a good job and care to make them feel listened to , but only because that facilitates me doing my job better and them having a bit more compliance in some of the things I say.

Fuck might want to apply to radiology just so I can do work from home/ just work in the dark room to avoid dumb hospital culture

>> No.10757200
File: 3.15 MB, 1701x1134, 1541251440937.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757200

>>10757187
The attractive nurses and the way of the environment puts you at ease so the fraudulent medical system can have its way with you. True story.

>> No.10757207

I have more than one degree, everyone is working for me. I dictate the game, if I lose I'm not to blame.

>> No.10757214
File: 1.27 MB, 2576x1932, 20190519_122304.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757214

>>10756555
Whiter than you, boy. The blue eyes are a bonus.

>> No.10757243

>>10757214
fucking cringe and sad. How insecure are you that you somehow need to prove your "whiteness" on an anonymous imageboard. I wouldn't want you to be my doc in a fucking thousand years.

>> No.10757245

>>10749090
At least they're not the second leading cause of death in the world
>t. patient

>> No.10757250

>>10757243
Kek, it's an old picture that was sitting in my phone, no effort whatsoever. I don't get why you got so mad over a picture of an eye.

>m-muh proof of being white
>b-bad doctor
Stay mad senpai.

>> No.10757260

>>10757250
>has pictures of his eyes saved in case someone calls him "not white" over the internet
You're just embarrassing yourself even further. You're the weird fuck who constantly talks about his mother I guess. Take a break from 4chan and deal with your insecurities in a healthy fashion.

>> No.10757265

>>10757260
>projecting this hard
I seriously have a hard time to think this isn't bait. The picture wasn't taken to show that I'm white, kek, stop assuming shit anon. Have a nice day.

>> No.10757273
File: 442 KB, 500x712, 1549858046821.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757273

>>10757265
>>10757260
Clamped?

>> No.10757287

>>10757273
*clamping noises*
So, 1 minute passed after she delivered, CLAMP the cord!
*clamp*
Good job, now get this baby into the OR so we can remove his foreskin.

>> No.10757389

>>10757245
Most of what falls under malpractice is actually done by nurses.

>> No.10757401

>>10757389
>>10757287
>>10757273
>>10757265
>>10757260
>>10757250
>>10757245
>>10757243
>>10757214
>>10757207
>>10757200
>>10757187
>>10757124
>>10757118
>>10757108
>>10757095
>>10757083
>>10757069
>>10757044
>>10757039
>>10757038
>>10757004
>>10756999
>>10756905
>>10756881
>>10756686
>>10756680
>>10756626
>>10756590
>>10756581
>>10756555
>>10756416
>>10756415
>>10756384
>>10756383
>>10756362
>>10756357
>>10756332
>>10756298
>>10756284
>>10756173
>>10756145
>>10756113
...
>Clamp.

>> No.10757427

Any med students want to be clamped by a cute nurse?

>> No.10757439

>>10757427
No, but I want to clamp her, if you know what I mean ;)

>> No.10757457

Serious question. What are the drawbacks of ketamine induced anesthesia. I was doing my summer practice and had this prison inmate come in with severe abdominal pain, the lads from radiology and the gen surg department decided it's appendicitis and before surgery he wanted ketamine for anesthesia. I didn't ask what are the drawbacks of it because I'm autistic and instead I'll ask here. Does it make the patient more aggressive when he wakes up? Is this type of anesthesia safe?

>> No.10757470

>>10757457
Ketamine is not suitable for general anesthesia for surgery, but it's safe and effective for analgesia and brief procedural sedation. The main drawbacks are that it causes a dissociative state that some patients react to bizarrely, and it has a very short half life.

>> No.10757478

>>10757470
Thank you, anon.

>> No.10757479

>>10757187
>I do a good job and care to make them feel listened to , but only because that facilitates me doing my job better and them having a bit more compliance in some of the things I say.
Sounds like you made a poor career choice.

>> No.10757504

>>10757439
Idm being a clampee, if you know what I mean :3

>> No.10757506
File: 39 KB, 163x150, his body is ready.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757506

>>10757504

>> No.10757518

>>10757506
YW, it’s my fav past time

>> No.10757598
File: 22 KB, 237x320, 20613FC2-C73C-4DEA-897D-4718CBA2B67C.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757598

>N*rses

>> No.10757600

>>10755575
Lmaoo holy shit you are in for such a surprise when you start working in a hospital

>> No.10757604

>>10757600
Are you so autistic that you don’t know a blatant joke when you see it? Please don’t go into a speciality with heavy patient contact.

>> No.10757610
File: 5 KB, 492x368, TIMESAND___762.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757610

Chris Moriarty is going to burn in hell.

>> No.10757620
File: 119 KB, 400x300, trollin'.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757620

>>10757604
>I-I was pretending
>I-it was a joke a-anon!

>> No.10757680

>>10756415
Niggers gonna nigg i guess

>> No.10757710
File: 261 KB, 500x500, 14975126470219.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10757710

>>10750397
male student nurse here, this isn't even a meme, i had one colleague literally talk about how she lost the ability to speak when a doctor asked her something and how she could do nothing but flush a deep shade of red even as she described what happened when she got asked, you'll find one im sure, but you have to get them young otherwise they adapt and find some confidence and stop being so unsure, because the difference in confidence between students and nurses who've worked for a while is astounding

>> No.10757724

>>10757620
>>I-I was pretending
>>I-it was a joke a-anon!
Even when I concede that is true, it doesn't change anything, Creonte.

It's like people think you can't get killed for joking around with the wrong person.

>> No.10757744

>>10757710
fucking based. I'll find myself a nice looking nurse gf
>>10757724
fucking cringe

>> No.10757911

>>10757214
you look like an east asian.

>> No.10757958

>>10757911
Thanks, I guess.

>> No.10758026

If anyone wants a laugh
https://pastebin.com/VuLYa82S

>> No.10758043

>>10758026
YIKES

>> No.10758168

Last year surgical rotation bro reporting in. Today I actually practiced real medicine.

>currently in general surgery
>go to see an operation
>anesthesia prof. is in charge today
>he knows I want to specialise
>allowed me to intubate a patient
>did it successfully this time
>happyboi.jpg
>after that went to help doc I'm assigned to
>helped with some paperwork
>he gets a call
>one of our patients is going under
>80 y.o. with tender distended abdomen, loss of flatulence and constipation, no peristaltics on auscultation, urea 32, creatinine 300+, low calcium,hypoproteinemia, hypoalbuminemia, anemia, pacemaker and a PT of 21 sec
>helped with CPR
>he actually kept his circulation, pretty sure it was because of the pacemaker
>2 mg atropine and 2 mg epi
>he was hard to ventilate, but we managed
>patient actually restored circulation, breathing and consciousness
>problem is he can't be operated in this state and he'll probably die next time

>>10755451
That's sad. I'm glad these tasks are still done by doctors here.
>>10756113
Looks fine. What is it?
>>10756415
>people coming to help
>let's attack them
???????
>>10756581
GLAMBED XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
>>10757427
Weak nurse from 2 threads ago?

>> No.10758179

>>10758168
Good job anon! Hope it goes well for you, anesthesia is a field that is too complicated for brainlets like me considering that you have tons of anesthetics and medication, the only thing I like about it is that it's comfy if you don't work in the ICU

>> No.10758875

>>10758168
Weak nurse from 2 threads ago, yes :^)

>> No.10758883

>>10749366
Fuck. This is so real it hurts.
People should stop writing papers about it and just use a fucking online form, so it would consolidate results better.

>> No.10758889

>>10758875
Would clamp 10/10.

>> No.10758911

>>10758168
Fuck I feel you anon. Had patients like that
Nephrology will try its tricks. Any imaging done on that abdomen?

>> No.10758912
File: 186 KB, 889x626, USSR, 1960.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10758912

>>10758026
"Responded previously"
>>/sci/thread/S10188209#p10189433

You know you're doing something right when they resort to manufactured character assassination. People are waking up 5G anon, doesn't look good for you. There's getting to be too many people for you to tell apart, so naturally you just use the larger pool to build a narrative you like.

>>10758043
This is you again. You do the same thing every time to try to bootstrap agreement. It's a play on the halo effect and group dynamics.

Anyone can do that, but it does skew me more towards you being an operative. Regardless, you have no concern for the truth.

>> No.10758946

>>10758889
That would be the ultimate privilege, Dr.

>> No.10758951
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10758951

>> No.10758979
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10758979

>> No.10758993
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10758993

>>10758946
>tfw no nurse gf to feel weak in my presence

>> No.10758994 [DELETED] 

/med/, I need your advice on something, since you're probably the ones most qualified to give it.

I'm a nurse-orderly at a nursing home, been there for a year so far, I work the night shift on the west wing. It's not that tough, since most of the residents are so old and medicated that they sleep the night away, only rarely dying or stroking out or getting up to eat their own poop or something. I usually wind up playing with my phone or reading at the nurse's station for the full four hours I'm on watch alone, from 1 to 5.

However a new patient arrived a month ago, which got my attention. A seven year old girl that was in a car crash that killed her parents, and took her legs, right arm, and right eye. As a ward of the state, and so messed up by all the trauma mentally that no foster parents would touch her, she got sent here when she got out of the hospital. God, she's so cute, she's half-japanese, but has blonde hair, and the rest of her body that didn't get cut away is just perfect, she used to be a gymnast, it seems. I've had to answer her call button several times so far, when she's had to use the restroom in the middle of the night, which meant carrying her from her bed to the toilet, then holding her as she used it, and she always looks away from me when she did so, blushing a little bit.

Anyway, my question: Should I stick it in her pooper (among other things)? I mean, she isn't going to be able to resist, and I can go in there when she's asleep, then cover up her good eye and mouth before she even knows I'm there, with all the drugs she's on. She's so messed up mentally that she probably wouldn't tell anyone, considering she's barely talked to all the shrinks they've had her seeing since the accident. I'm a pretty gentle guy, and there's plenty of lube around here (obviously), and it'd be pretty easy to clean her up afterward, too.

Anyway, what do you think, /med/

>> No.10759004

>>10758994
Jesus, that takes me back.

>> No.10759006

>>10758994
MOOOOOODS

>> No.10759007

>>10758994
A 7 year old girl didn't "used to be a gymnast".

You're a disgusting pedophile.

>> No.10759011

>>10758993
It’ll happen for us anon <3 qt nursey for you, clever dr for me.

>> No.10759015

>>10758994
I hope this is a troll post, it would be awful to do that to this poor girl think about all the trauma she has already faced. If that doesn’t stop you then think about prison + losing your job and future.

>> No.10759016
File: 77 KB, 380x349, boomer.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10759016

>>10758994
>now *crack Nurse-kun, those *sip were some real threads

>> No.10759021

>>10759015
The way he writes about it, I wouldn't be surprised if it was a legit pedophile. Just look at the infantile theory of mind and inability to process emotions or empathize properly.

Pedophilia may be genetically biased, but is overall caused by specific types of early life trauma leading to arrested psychosexual-social development. Hence the molested becoming the molester. Its coping mechanisms induce blind spots and it must prove that it's okay by passing on its trauma.

Death is probably the only cure.

>> No.10759027
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10759027

>>10758994

>> No.10759029
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10759029

>>10758912
Stamp your feet and scream all you want, I only came here to post my copypasta and watch you flail. I have no need to talk to myself or push any agenda other than amusement on 4chan, unlike certain people in this thread uWu

>> No.10759030

>>10759021
Yikes, that's terrifying. I agree to an extent anon, we will see if after his expression and faced with our responses changes his mind.

>> No.10759033

Are medical schools in Belgium and the Netherlands any good?

>> No.10759036

>>10759030
>>10759021
>>10759015
>>10759006
>>10759007
Don't worry guys, this is an ancient pasta. Nice dig I have to admit.

>> No.10759039
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10759039

>>10759029
I think you mean you show up, get beat out of here, and then disappear again. Which is why you prefer to post when you think I'm not around, isn't it anon? ;^)

The bulk of the posts you quote aren't even me. It doesn't matter though, because it's all about hit and run crafting a narrative, trying to muddy the waters. I asked you last time, are you married? Have family? Kids?

>> No.10759043

>>10759039
>>10759029
Please can you take this elsewhere, I'm trying to troll /med/ with /b/ shit from 15 years ago.


>>10759004
>>10759016
>>10759036
Suprisingly many boomers here.

>> No.10759046

>>10759039
>I asked you last time, are you married? Have family? Kids?
You're confusing me with someone else.
Sounds like you've been clamped my friend

>> No.10759049

>>10759033
Where are you from? I would assume they are similar to other Western European med schools.

>> No.10759058
File: 842 KB, 2801x2202, clamp.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10759058

>>10759046
C L A M P E D
L
A
M
P
E
D

>> No.10759356

>>10757958
it means you aren't white, retard.

>> No.10759383

Do you think the whole cuck / BBC thing has prompted doctors to give blacks harsher circumcisions? Or the inverse, out of a secret reverence.

>> No.10759773

>>10759383
Circumcisers are inherently emasculated. Just think about a "man" who gets up every day to go and strap down helpless infants, who will one day be men, and amputate parts of their genitals.

He can be nothing other than small and insecure.

>> No.10759820
File: 177 KB, 1282x1004, 1560279256529.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10759820

What causes the pee shivers?

>> No.10759868

>>10759773
Or...he does it for the money.

>> No.10759871

>>10759868
You ever have a job? It's never just for the money, or you won't do it for long.

You're saying he's a mindless sociopath. Probably also true.

>> No.10759876

>>10759871
I was referring to the procedure, in this case, circumcision. They make money for the hospital by doing it because they sell the foreskin for research or stem cells or whatever.

>> No.10759903

>>10759356
Still whiter than you.

>> No.10759909

>>10759876
Face creams as well. Need those foreskins for cosmetics...

If we all just decided we'd had enough, and said no, we could change the world in a day.

>> No.10760109

Any of you lads going on an elective this year?

I'm off to deepest rural India to see mad shit for a month

>> No.10760110

>>10759876
>They make money for the hospital by doing it because they sell the foreskin for research or stem cells or whatever.
How is that legal anyways

>> No.10760382

>>10751821
It’s cuz of that damn phone

>> No.10760471

>>10759383
This American thing of circumcisions being the standard scares the hell out of me. How could the medical profession and the general population get on board with it?

>> No.10760798

>>10758179
Thanks, dude.
>>10758875
You had a nice body, I gotta admit and I still don't know if you're trolling us.
>>10758911
X-ray with hydroaeric levels. He died that afternoon btw :/
>>10760109
You'll probably learn a ton.

>> No.10761249
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10761249

>OMFG NOOOOOO MY PATIENT DIED BROS THIS IS SO SAD :(

>> No.10761493

>>10761249
Oh no, what happened anon?
Did you learn anything, if so what? You never forget your first pt that passes.

>> No.10761501

>>10760798
Thanks anon appreciate that, I mean I can send you more if you fancy ;^)

I’m def not trolling, really enjoy this board :)

>> No.10761580

Alright is a "I don't know, let me think about, just send me a CV in the mean time" a nice way of saying no to writing me a rec letter or do I actually have a chance of convincing them?

For context, I had most of upper level science course with this guy. I was doing great but for a number of reasons I ended up falling apart and failed class my last semester requiring me to retake and it is a class he taught(it was a bullshit how to do research class).

I'm doing a lot better now though after therapy and meds.

>> No.10762574

>>10762572
>>10762572
>>10762572
>>10762572
>>10762572

NEW