[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/sci/ - Science & Math


View post   

File: 103 KB, 725x545, StairwayToHeaven.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
1026092 No.1026092 [Reply] [Original]

OK, I have a plan to prove you all wrong. I am going to go to the holy land, I know it's dangerous, but my mission is sacred and I also know I will be protected.

Now, I know most the holy relics are fake and any body part of Jesus or of his cross are most certainly unfindable.

But here is the trick, I am going to look for what nobody else has ever tried to look for.
I am going to look for JESUS'S SHIT!

Think about it, he lived for 30 years, he must have produced a lot of shit in this time.

I am going to go to the holy land, dig wherever Jesus has ever gone, and thanks to the holy shit detector I build myself, I'll found and collect all of Jesus's shit. Then I'll rub myself in it, And I'll rub every sick and disabled.

All the Jesus's shit I'll found will help me cure cancer and AIDS. You will have no way to deny Jesus divine status. And you will be told!

>> No.1026118

have you tested your detector?

>> No.1026141

>>1026118
Yes, I have tested it with my own shit. It doesn't respond to it.
So it work!

>> No.1026151

Fuck the fuck off.

>> No.1026154

I lol'd harder than I should've

>> No.1026316

>>1026141
u'r an engineer...

>> No.1026357

>>1026092
>any body part of Jesus or of his cross are most certainly unfindable.

Mainly because he never existed.

>> No.1026760

>>1026357
There are roman record of his execution.

>> No.1026769

If jesus shat, his shit absorbed into the earth and plants and stuff grew out from it, and animals at the plants and so on, until you literally ate a part of jesus.

>> No.1026778

>>1026760
> 30 AD: Well, we finally killed the fucking son of god.

>> No.1026795

is this whole thing set up for me to say a holy fucking shit joke op?

>> No.1026813

>>1026769
What about fossilized shit? It's in the desert after all.

>> No.1026845

It'd be mummified shit.

>> No.1026865

OP, I'm lollin'. Thanks for being awesome.

>> No.1027687

>>1026760
never trust italians

>> No.1027729

>>1026760
All a lie by the Templars. Didn't you play Assassin's Creed I and II? They're like The Da Vinci Code only not boring, pretentious, and ill-researched.

>> No.1027789

>>1027729
I just beat #2 yesterday. I like how at the end, they completely embrace the crazy sub part of the franchises plot and drop the pretense of realism. Gets rid of the contrast they had before.

Fighting the pope with superpowers ftw!

>> No.1027795

>>1027729

Da Vinci Code - bad writing + The Matrix - black leather + Grand Theft Auto - cars + Deus Ex - cyborgs + Xenogears - mecha + shaggy god story - lameness + Prince of Persia - magic + Angels and Demons - more bad writing + really good writing = Assassin's Creed series.