/sci/ - Science & Math

>>11750534
>No dying until the age of 24.
I've lost count of the number of all-nighters I've pulled off in the last month trying to get this thing complete. I've been proving every statement I make in full detail but this one section is really fucking me with me because I realize I'll have to write another 5-10 pages to rigorously provide the entire definitions-lemmas setup before I can present the result I want to use and move on. I'm so utterly exhausted and I don't know if I can do that hence the limbo
I need someone to come here and finish these last few pages or just kill me

>first real project ever due this Thursday

>>9671834
d-delet this

>>9529259
That verry narrow criteria of intelligence is the only one that matters though

>>9530407
What if you stopped posting garbage

>>9525077
Let's just say I still have nothing better to do than spend all my time on 4chan to the point where I somehow found someone posting a screenshot of my own post.

>>9243668
Yes

I went down the following path
>Stop caring about the fact that I have no friends
>Study all day
>Get straight A+'s, settling for A's sometimes
>Major in Computer Science, get great GPA and internship experience
>Multiple offers from top companies
>I now make hella bank
>My life is set
>R-right...?

Fuck no. I'm still suicidal. I'm still miserable. I still have no friends. Yay, I get to go to work and work hard for a multibillion dollar corporation's benefit, then I walk home in the rain and pace around my room contemplating suicide all night and shitpost on the internet, when I've lost the motivation to read and study even more

If I just study some more everything will make sense right? Get a bit better at math, learn a bit more theoretical CS, learn some more algorithms, learn more about AI and machine learning. Then my life will be good right?

No, I'll just be a more effective tool for this corporation

Fuck life, fuck everything, I want to kill myself. Why didn't I focus on learning how to make friends. Why didn't I focus on talking to girls or some shit? Why didn't I do ANYTHING but this? FUCK LIFE

FUCK MY LIFE.

(((THIS))) is the best path? The responsible one? Get good grades, get a good job, never break the law, make tons of money?

Yet live alone in a miserable apartment in with nobody to share my life with, walk home alone every day, go to sleep alone, wake up alone, go to work alone, work alone in my office, eat lunch alone in my office, walk home alone, be miserable all alone

Fuck my life

There's too much to learn and not enough time in a single lifetime

I want to study math, machine learning, physics, astrophysics, astronomy, chemistry, geology, marine biology, botany, survival skills, art history, and learn a few languages, but I will die before I do even a fraction of that

How do you decide what you really want to do? I try to read or study at least 10 hours every weekend and 2 hours per week day but this is not enough, and if I do more my eyeballs literally start getting sore since my job is as a software developer staring at computers all day

Fuck man. I want to just get rich and retire early somehow so I can study all day long every day

How do you guys narrow in on exactly what you want to study? I'm so upset