/sci/ - Science & Math

TONIGHT, AT 7:53 PM EASTERN TIME, STARLINK 17 WILL ONCE AGAIN TRY WITH ALL HER MIGHT TO REACH THE STARS.

THE PRIESTS OF NEPTUNE AND VULCAN ARE IN DISAGREEMENTS WITH EACH OTHER ABOUT THE CAUSES OF THE DELAY. CITIZENS ARE ADVISED TO DEDICATE SACRIFICES TO BOTH, IF THEY ARE ABLE.

TOMORROW, STARSHIP SNX WILL DARE TO TOUCH THE HEAVENS AND LAND IN THE LATEST FLIGHT TEST. AUGURIES WILL BE TAKEN TO ENSURE GOOD OMENS AND A SUCCESSFUL FLIGHT.

THIS LAUNCH UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY BOEING
TRUE AMERICAN TRAGEDIES! FOR TRUE AMERICANS!

AUGURIES HAVE BEEN TAKEN FOR THE ROVER PERSERVERANCE AND THE OMENS ARE GOOD.

THE SACRED CHICKENS HAVE EATEN AND SUGGEST GOOD FINDINGS ARE AHEAD FOR MARS MISSION 2020.

TOMORROW, AT 12:56 PM EASTERN TIME, A NORTHROP GRUMMAN ANTARES ROCKET WILL LAUNCH THE 16TH CYGNUS CARGO FREIGHTER ON THE 15TH OPERATIONAL CARGO DELIVERY FLIGHT TO THE INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION. THE MISSION IS KNOWN AS NG-15.

THE ROCKET WILL FLY IN THE ANTARES 230 CONFIGURATION, WITH TWO RD-181 FIRST STAGE ENGINES AND A CASTOR 30XL SECOND STAGE.

THIS LAUNCH WILL TAKE PLACE AT THE WALLOPS ISLAND PAD 0A IN THE PROVINCE OF VIRGINIA.

LAUNCH THREAD WILL BE PROVIDED BY MARCUS ANONYMOUS IN THE HOURS PRIOR TO LAUNCH.

BE AWARE.

NO FURFAGS, JANNIES, OR UNCLEAN REDDITORS MAY ATTEND.

THIS NEWS UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY THE BELTER GUILD OF MINERS.
TRUE ROMAN MINERALS, FOR TRUE ROMANS!

17 AND A HALF HOURS FROM NOW, THE FINAL DESCENT OF PERSEVERANCE TO MARS BEGINS.

ALL CITIZENS ARE TO MAKE SACRIFICES TO THE TEMPLES OF MERCURY, NEPTUNE, AND MARS FOR SAFE TIDINGS.

NO EXCEPTIONS WILL BE GIVEN!

THE PRIESTS OF BOREAS HAVE ANNOUNCED THAT THE PROVINCE OF TEXAS HAS ANGERED HIM SO, AND ARE CURRENTLY BEING PUNISHED FOR THEIR ARROGANCE TOWARDS HIM.

CITIZENS OF TEXAS ARE URGED BY THE PRIESTS TO SACRIFICE A WHITE RABBIT TO THE NORTHERN WIND GOD AS A SHOW OF REPENTANCE.

THIS NEWS UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY TESLA, INC.
TRUE AMERICAN CARS! FOR TRUE AMERICANS!

THE AUGURIES HAVE BEEN TAKEN FOR STARLINK 19 AND THEY HAVE BEEN FOUND TO BE UNFAVORABLE FOR LAUNCH TONIGHT. THE NEW DATE FOR LAUNCH IS 11:20 PM EASTERN TIME ON THE 14 OF THIS MONTH.

IN THE FAR AWAY LANDS OF KAZAKHSTAN, A RUSSIAN SOYUZ ROCKET WILL LAUNCH THE 77TH PROGRESS CARGO DELIVERY SHIP TO THE INTERNATIONAL SPACE STATION

25 MINUTES AFTER EXPECTED STARLINK LAUNCH THE RUSSIAN SOYUZ IS SCHEDULED TO FLY AT 11:45 PM EASTERN TIME ON THE 14TH

LAUNCH THREADS WILL BE PROVIDED BY MARCUS ANONYMOUS PRIOR TO LAUNCH.

BE AWARE, NO DISORDER WILL BE TOLERATED. ANY FOUND FURRY POSTERS ARE ORDERED TO BE STONED.

THIS LAUNCH UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY THE GUILD OF ASTERIOD MINERS.
TRUE ROMAN MINERALS, FOR TRUE ROMANS!