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>> No.12147098 [View]
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12147098

I'm graduating in Biology in 2 weeks and this feeling of being a fraud is peaking. And it's no Impostor syndrome meme, it's the sad truth.
I feel like this shit uni failed me, but i failed myself too. I swear i tried to study just for the sake of learning, not waste my time and do things i still think i like, like going to labs even when i wasn't required to (actually they weren't mandatory cause we were too many, we have close to no serious lab experience). I went out of my way to "work" (no retribution at all, even in terms of credits) under a professor i liked more than a year before my internship started, stayed 'till late everytime, did everything i was asked to do, asked the prof to make me do things, talked to and helped another prof...Even came up with a personal research project that i partially carried out. and i loved it, i loved doing research, i loved DOING things, applying knowledge, reading through papers and finding solutions, experimenting.
But i never liked studying, i always did it, even with decent results, just to pass exams with the highest mark possible, not actually studying to retain knowledge.
And now here i am, crying over myself like a bitch, lacking of the most basic knowledge of the degree i'm going to get (with a second honorous too, imagine how shit my uni and its evaluation methods are).
Having a shit fucking memory also doesn't help, i've forgotten everything from my past exams, biology requires a very good memory.
What the fuck do i do guys, i live in fear to be asked by my friends some very basic bio facts and being speechless, everyone will know that i'm just an absolute failure

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