/lit/ - Literature

When I was 10, my parents got divorced and I had to move with my 3 brothers and my sister with my mother from city A (I'll just call it that) to city B (where my mother was born and family is from). I had already changed school once before this so I thought it would not be a big problem to make new friends again. But this is when I started to get problems with talking to people. This city had a quite different dialect than from where I'm born, and I was feeling very embarrassed to talk in class because I thought I sound strange. I made a few good friends quickly but now I was becoming more and more afraid to talk to anyone outside my family. Then I started talking with a very low voice and later almost whispering. I did not say a word in class out loud after that, but I was doing very well in all subjects.

I started playing video games in most of my free time, and I did not really know what being social was, or why it would be good for me. For example my class was going one a one-week trip to a place and it costed a little amount of money, but I remember that I actually was more interested in buying some game instead for that money. I couldn't anyway, and that was a fun trip. But maybe I was becoming antisocial. My 2,5 years younger brother is the complete opposite of me, very social and outgoing. So he was starting to hang out with my friends more than I did, and I remembered that when i was hanging out with them and my brother, I just decided to "give up" on being a talkative guy and let my brother be that type. And thats how it went. This is when I was starting to understand that there's a point of being social, but I felt it was too late to change myself or something.

But honestly, what would you say, if you are someone with a working social life (i.e. you are successful, have friends, do like your own life, etc.) and some maverick who you never talked to would contact you out of the blue? Wouldn't this just be creepy? (especially if the course where you have met the last five months is already over)
Is there any possibility of contacting someone you have seen for five months but never talked to, because you were too shy or didn't have any courage, without appearing creepy?

I don't know what to do, I don't exactly know what inner barrier restrains me from just talking to people I like.
It's low self esteem, the fact that I don't know what to say, the fear of making a fool of myself, but what else?

The only thing I know for sure is, I don't want this to go on. I don't want to stay a lurker, but I have no idea where to start.

Since I began my studies at university, my life, my motivation, my ambition seemed to decrease.
The fact that studying science at university is so much harder and different to science at school made my grades worsen, followed by my self esteem decrease seeing that everyone around me seems to understand everything (as grade distributions show). I don't even know if I will be able to pass my bachelor's thesis, which makes be brood over my life every second.
I simply feel like a stupid loser.

I don't know anyone of my fellow students and I never actually talked to them. I don't have any friends apart from university and even in school I never had friends but "people I know".
Originally, I used to be a lone wolf, because I'm not interested in most people. However, I've suffered from being lonely all the time, but displaced every emerging thought by reading books, playing the piano and similar things that you do on your own.
Over the time I've got more and more depressed, I've felt empty and there is nothing more I am interested in.

I'm not quite sure if the term "lurker" exactly explains what I feel like.
I feel like someone observating people I am interested in during tutorials or seminars, listening to their discussions, sometimes at the very point of intervening to paticipate, but never got the courage to actually speak or to actually show any interest physically, so that I remain a never talking weirdo who sits in the last row.
Not only am I an outsider, but I also once looked up someone I really liked and wanted to get to know, on the general internet (not(!) Facebook, etc.), found their web page and got more and more interested in their life and thinking. Especially when you share interests.
And finally I played with the idea of contacting this person.

I have a spare block at school, and usually I just end up sitting on my own doing the regular stack of homework. Not a typically social guy myself, I don't exactly have that many friends and I would really like to make some more. There are some people who sit a few tables away from me, sometimes just one of them, sometimes a group, who I know (through eavesdropping, yes, and for THAT I feel guilty lol) share a great deal of the same interests as I do! Sometimes I work myself up, telling myself I should just go over and talk to them (we know each other, but just like typical school-aquantences), but I can NEVER actually bring myself to do it. Usually I'm just afraid of having little to say and just end up awkardly sitting there
Any tips on how to muster up the courage to actually get to know these people? I would really like to actually spend time with people on this spare, cause sometimes just sitting alone gets really depressing

Tbh i dont know why im here... I just want a place to write down what i feel, im not looking for someone to pity me or anything like that. I just want to expres my self.

Every week of every day and every minute and every second i feel like i should die! I have never experienced true love or true friendship. I don´t know what more i should write but what i know is that i feel so lonely and sad that i cry every night! I don´t know why i haven´t killed myself already tbh... Every day i think up 10 different ways i could kill myself.

Being frightened to go to school is something no kid should have to fear. I do think that if I had told ppl and been different about things back then that I would now have a completely different life. But to have been different back then I would have needed some confidence to have dealt with the bullying. so its kinder a catch 22. Know I would sooner be killed fighting then feel the shame that I felt back then in knowing that I let them get away with doing all the stuff they did. I should of told my dad even tho he would of thought less of me and yes I still think that he would of done and am now 32 but fuck it I should of any way. It least then I could of started dealing with the problem instead of baring my head in the sand.

I just watched something on TV about it and it burt a few things back to me. This girl that was being bullied. God I felt so sorry for her. If only I could put what is in sighed my head into hers. She would know there are ways to deal with it. But it goes back to having no confidence to do any thing about it. That's the problem. Bout time you do get the confidence the damage has already been done.

My advice to any one that's getting bullied. Tell the howl wide world. A teacher, mum, dad any one that well lessen no matter how silly you feel. Get help and know there is no shame in asking for help. No one is an island. We all need help from time to time in life.

I am just wondering how many ppl hear got bullied when they where at school are still are getting bullied know.

I got bullied at school and it takes every thing away from you. I was not the most confident pupil at school and being called names and having paper clips fired at you and what not did nothing for the bit of confidence I did have.

I wish I could go back now with what I know now and do it again. I would not let them get away with it now. Every time I was pushed to the flow I should of got up and smacked them strait in the mouth. What would be the worst that could happen? I get beat on. But at least they would get hurt as well. Are I would tell the world what was happening instead of shouting up and being ashamed of it. Its not my fault that this happened but back then I was so ashamed of it I told no one.

Being called and sometimes physically hit every day at school tacks confidence away from you on a lively that no one should have to deal with. No wonder I struggle with my spelling. I have learnt moor on grammar and spelling in the past 2 years from posting on forums then I ever did at school. But when you don't feel relaxed and are constantly looking over your shoulder its not surprising that I did not even grasp the basics of english litrecher.

I hate this flaw about myself. My friends like me, and I'm not ugly. I'm not mentally retarded, I haven't done anything bad. But yet I just can't pull the trigger because I'm a pathetic coward. I'm so scared of approaching girls.

From time to time, there have been moments tents where I walk down the streets for example, and girls have even smiled and said 'hi' to me. For any dude, this would be a massive confidence booster but for me, I'm still scared shitless to approach girls. I still have a low view of myself. Despite the fact that many people have told me that I'd make a great boyfriend and that girls would be lucky to have me as boyfriend.

Whether that is true or not, it's not up to me to decide. But it's starting to get to me now that the sun has emerged and I see all these couples walking around in the beautiful weather. Why does every guy get a girlfriend, why does everyone find love except for me? That is the missing piece of the puzzle, otherwise, I have great friends, my studies are going relatively well, I'm physically healthy. I mean, I'm not some psychopath, I'm not born with mental retardation. So why in the fucking name can't I pull the trigger and be confident? The conditions are there

I'm a very lonely person because I decide to not let anyone in and shut everybody out and I've lived my whole life in my own desolate tower of isolation because I'm obsessive. Sharing experiences with other people adds entirely unpredictable variables and circumstances of things beyond my control, beyond the certainty of my self, so I choose to avoid people in general from growing into my life. I wish I could let go because being emotionally isolated for so long is beginning to take a toll on my sanity and grip on reality. I wish I could let go but instead I post this on an image board anonymously confessing it and thinking that it helps.

Post your favorite poem by your favorite poet. Give a critique/analysis of other people's posted poems and why you like or dislike it.
-
"Skunk Hour" by Robert Lowell

Nautilus Island's hermit
heiress still lives through winter in her Spartan cottage;
her sheep still graze above the sea.
Her son's a bishop. Her farmer
is first selectman in our village;
she's in her dotage.

Thirsting for
the hierarchie privacy
of Queen Victoria's century,
she buys up all
the eyesores facing her shore,
and lets them fall.

The season's ill--
we've lost our summer millionaire,
who seemed to leap from an L. L. Bean
catalogue. His nine-knot yawl
was auctioned off to lobstermen.
A red fox stain covers Blue Hill.

And now our fairy
decorator brightens his shop for fall;
his fishnet's filled with orange cork,
orange, his cobbler's bench and awl;
there is no money in his work,
he'd rather marry.

One dark night,
my Tudor Ford climbed the hill's skull;
I watched for love-cars. Lights turned down,
they lay together, hull to hull,
where the graveyard shelves on the town. . . .
My mind's not right.

A car radio bleats,
"Love, O careless Love. . . ." I hear
my ill-spirit sob in each blood cell,
as if my hand were at its throat. . . .
I myself am hell;
nobody's here--

only skunks, that search
in the moonlight for a bite to eat.
They march on their soles up Main Street:
white stripes, moonstruck eyes' red fire
under the chalk-dry and spar spire
of the Trinitarian Church.

I stand on top
of our back steps and breathe the rich air--
a mother skunk with her column of kittens swills the garbage pail.
She jabs her wedge-head in a cup
of sour cream, drops her ostrich tail,
and will not scare.

bump

Darwin's Origin of Species showed that our categories for organisms like 'cat' or 'lion' do not exist because organisms evolve persistently and the categories we give them are only due to similarity and not any type of sameness. Any specific organism is uniquely different from any given other.

this means that there is no such thing as the 'human being' since it is only a false category we use to explain a group of unique organisms who are similar enough for us to deem it as a category

so then this destroys all notion of the individual and the community

there can never be a community of individuals because each individual is uniquely different from the other--a community would require a collection of the individual, but there is no collection of a specific person and only uniqueness between the multiple ones

since all organisms are unique, we can represent each of them as A, B, C, etc

a community (a collection of individuals) would mean a collection of A, or a collection of B, etc

since A is unique it is a category with only itself as a member, and the same with B, C, etc

foreveralone.jpg

>>1649139
>many people don't have a dynamic ip
>dynamic ip's can be area banned whereas hotspotshield cannot
>implying I don't know that stagolee is quentin
>implying I care or that my post was directed at him

www.hotspotshield.com

oh look no more ban


retards

>>1647952
Actually T.S. Eliot is one of the poets I've not read much so I think any resemblance with his style is because I read a lot from the poets he heavily influenced

appreciate your feedback because the 'connecting' and 'flowing' quality you're talking about is what I really have trouble here

I used to be an English major but switched to philosophy before I had the chance to take more than one poetry course :(

>>1647927
read up on philosophical pragmatism and you will see your entire world of certainty and absolute truth dissolve

>>1647886
did not have a specific meaning in mind but I used it as a title because I thought its elasticity of imagery would fit well

also thanks for the input

>>1647869
how would you redo some of my line break choices? I haven't been able to get past doing them poorly or I'll think I'm using them for some specific purpose when I'm just not sure sometimes where to properly use line breaks

ITT films that /lit/izens must see (does not need to be film adaptations of novels)

pic VERY related.

>>1647852
I want your criticism of my poetry

>>1647799
feels bad man

and I'm Roger fucking Ebert

aaaaaand there goes my thread