/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.9873893]

Greentext your life, other anons will recommend you a book

[Anonymous No.9873921]

>he stops caring

[Anonymous No.9873963]

>grew up in the suburbs
>had no friends growing up, spent all my time reading and studying
>got into a top 5 university
>was so disgusted by my lack of social skills, that I vowed to change myself over the summer before entering college by acquiring social skills, working in retail, forcing myself to interact with people
>did so, graduated, acquired finance job
>after years of making myself outgoing, start to slide back into apathy
>now maintains few friendships
>now sliding back into doing nothing but reading and studying when not at work
>loses all my friends

[Anonymous No.9873985]

>>9873963
Read some Stirner

[Anonymous No.9873987]

>>9873893
>tfw ugly

That's it

[Anonymous No.9873988]

>Oxford graduate, has degrees in 3 languages other than his mother-tongue
>no job, no gf, no friends, no money
>still lives at home at 25
>however, still is happy and takes pleasure in small things like reading books and preparing meals for my family

[Anonymous No.9874001]

>28 years old
>works in a boring bureaucrat job in the financial sector
>well payed
>socially detached, always avoids relationships
>no friends, no family
>spend most of my time reading or on netflix
>takes out sexual frustration on hookers
>smokes way too much
and for some reason I don't think I'll make it past 35, it's weird but I just get that feeling

[Anonymous No.9874006]

Is /lit/ filled with intelligent but socially inept and unsuccessful people? How does this happen?

[Anonymous No.9874013]

>eh

[Anonymous No.9874015]

>>9874001
Kafka sounds fitting

[Anonymous No.9874018]

>get ejected from a vagoo
>go through the motions
>be disappointed with everything
>want to want to live or do suicide finally
>kinda dead

>>9873988
Gogol, The Overcoat
>>9874001
Thinking about American Psycho, but the book is rather boring. Idunno. Stop smoking.
>>9874013
Das Kapital

[Anonymous No.9874049]

>>9874006
>intelligent but socially inept and unsuccessful people
How does this NOT happen? That's exactly the archetype of the literate person..

[Anonymous No.9874061]

>grew up in a somewhat wealthy family
>mother drinks, but still have a generally happy family
>I start University at 20 yo (computer science)
>my father gets diagnosed with bone-maw cancer
>I drop out due to depression
>I work 2 years
>Join University again at 23, but on this time in machine engineering
>on 3rd semester at university

[Anonymous No.9874087]

>have sheltered childhood in an upper middle class suburban house
>don't realize i am sheltered until age 20 or so
>realize i am a child in a man's body
>resent my parents and hate myself
>read write work minimum wage and shitpost all day
>want to be an artist but my conservative upbringing is a nagging voice in the back of my head saying that's a narcissistic irresponsible and unrealistic path

[Anonymous No.9874102]

>>9874087
The Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man

[Anonymous No.9874105]

>>9874102
ive read it great book

[Anonymous No.9874106]

>>9874087
>want to be an artist but my conservative upbringing is a nagging voice in the back of my head saying that's a narcissistic irresponsible and unrealistic path
The nagging voice is correct.

[Anonymous No.9874114]

>>9874106
which is why it keeps on nagging

[Anonymous No.9874121]

>>9873893
>Late teens
>Tennis phenom
>Dad put his head in a microwave
>Retarded brother
>Speech impediment

[Anonymous No.9874125]

Shitty story for my shitty life
>passed 5th grade, top of the class
>it's summer
>grandfather gets sick again because of cancer
>go with grandfather to the city couple hours away because he needs ultraviolet treatment for cancer
>I'm really attached to him I guess.jpg
>6th grade starts, start studying again, top of the class again
>grandfather has been getting weaker as the time gets on
>it's January, he'll likely due in few months
>it's March, he dies
>don't go to school for rest of the session
>it's finals, not exactly worried
>top of the class again
>summer is average that year
>school start, don't attend the session for first 15 days
>go in, new teacher, she's a bitch
>stopped going to school after 10 or so days
>it's quarterly exams (education system is weird in third world), haven't really attended class
>go in the exams like a boss, really confident that I managed to cover 3 months of course in 15 days
>stop going to school after exams
>results come
>I'm 4th in the class
>throw bitchfit at all the teachers, accuse them of being biased against me, say that they don't want me to top the class and feed my ego
>stop going to school completely
>don't even go for the exams even though they gave me the opportunity to complete the session
>fuck my year is wasted
>actually it isn't
>my educator from foreign language tuition arranged a forged marksheet, education system here is corrupt I guess
>become depressed, get social anxiety
>literally a hikikomori
>start getting free ride on my education until 10th grade
>start actually studying again for 10th
>study throughout the year
>it's finals time, get cold feet and don't go to all the exams
>get my forged marksheet for 10th as well
>never go to school again
>depressed and NEET
>now I'm 20 and I can't attend University until I have graduated 12th (high school for first worlders)
>thinking about graduating high school this year, want to go in liberal arts
>still fighting my crippling depression and social anxiety
>should go see a psychologist
Don't even know what you'd be able to recommend me.

[Anonymous No.9874126]

>grow up an alpha male
>Age 18 started smoking weed and talking about meaning of life with friends
>Get into nihilism and Nietzsche
>Get depressed, started finding solutions in philosophy
>Age 20 I have a basic understanding of the most importants philosophers. Still depressed.
>Started studying eastern philosophy
>Age 21, i am enlightened.

[Anonymous No.9874128]

>>9874121
>speech impediment
i dont remember this and i've read IJ twice

[Anonymous No.9874132]

>>9874126
LSD helped too.

[Anonymous No.9874150]

>>9874125
I would recommend you an hero

[Anonymous No.9874163]

>>9874126
Said every prep school kid who liked philosophy and then started doing drugs especially smoking and tripping

ohhowbanal.jpg

[Anonymous No.9874204]

> be child
> mom cant work because of serious injury
> barely participates in life, spends most time in bed taking care of younger siblings until they're able to walk and therefore do things by themselves
> grow up poor, moms injury contributed to this but my family was poor before that so its not the only thing causing it
> shit neighborhood because we cant afford anywhere else
> amber alerts/missing persons on a regular basis
> literally 5 drug dealers in my neighborhood
> my actual neighbors growing up (that we had a few good conversations with as a family) was running a meth lab out of their basement
> be a literal retard (a few developmental issues but im high functioning) so dont understand any of this
despite my objectively shit situation my family had a close bond. we spent a lot of time together.
> be 11
> mom has managed to get back into the workforce, we're earning more money
> in elementary school
> legitimate drug and theft issues at said elementary school
> someone steals all of my shit one day
> my parents get fed up with shit neighborhood
> save up money
> move out

> several years later
> were now middle, lower-middle class instead of dirt poor
> live in suburban neighborhood
> as a family we have everything we want
> decent house, kinda small but eh
> food in the pantry, consistently
> friendly neighbors that dont run cartels out of their basement
> safe suburban neighborhood
> life is great, supposedly
> things have changed between us since moving here
> family is very tense all of the time
> parents hate me and siblings
> literally tell me that they regret having me and say same thing to other kids
> say that im already a failure even though almost 4.0 gpa from high school (that im wasting, essentially, because they will only pay for community college right now and i cant afford more than that), have been published in a few lit mags and have multiple short stories that are ready to be published but havent yet been sold
> recently turned 18, going to college soon to study physics
> cant afford to move out so have to live with them until out of college
> not a big deal but in order to get a good job in my desired field i need to have a masters or phd
> they make my life a living hell when i step into the same room as them
> this is the next 6-9 years of my life

[Anonymous No.9874209]

>>9874163
cliches exist for a reason desu
the first time you start tripping it's like the world is finally unfolding for you and you feel like the only one who knows. where does it all come from how is all this in our brains from birth and yet unaccessible what does it mean look at all these people on the street who dont KNOW what i KNOW

[Anonymous No.9874218]

>>9873893
>32-year-old lawyer
>Sits in office all day, depressed
>Single. Haven't recovered from last relationship 3 years ago
>Live alone
>Sometimes go to the park to feed the birds
>also alchoholic

[Anonymous No.9874224]

>>9874128
Somewhat of a joke in that Hal loses his ability to communicate.

I jest, I jest ;)

[Anonymous No.9874230]

>>9874209
I know what tripping is you plebiscite. And your perspective on it is why I hate little fucks like you who believe themselves on drugs. Nothing is unlocked faggot. You're high dumbshit

[Anonymous No.9874241]

>>9874230
i don't even do drugs anymore i'm just saying this is why people act like that when they first discover them. it's LIKE a whole new world is opening up, of course it's all noise and nonsense but it feels like a serious breakthrough and you can't expect anybody to keep their mouth shut about something like that for a while.

[Anonymous No.9874248]

>>9874248
It's another narcissist write about themselves and get no replies thread.

[Anonymous No.9874250]

>>9873987
Ham on rye

[Anonymous No.9874269]

>avoiding people
>avoiding people even more

[Anonymous No.9874315]

>>9874269
Catcher in the Rye or l'etranger

[Anonymous No.9874336]

>hard to talk about things i like with others
>get bored when they're talking about something i don't care about
>and so it's not easy to pick something to talk about
>looks back at the chances i missed, >even if i want to fix them and i have a chance to do it, i don't
Basically socially awkward guy, that just lets things go the way they're going. I don't think it's stoicism, because I don't want it to go like that, but just something always blocks me inside.

[Anonymous No.9874339]

>grew up in a relatively big city in Brazil
>my father used to beat up my mother, so they divorced and she went to live with my grandma on a small town
>I go live with her
>had few friends, spent most of my time playing Super Nintendo (the PS2 was already out, but things used to happen at a slower rate around here, the PS1 was already a good for few people)
>used to go bicycling all time with one friend, sometimes we played co-op games on SNES and later we started playing Ragnarok
>I moved back to my father's house to be able to study in a decent school
>lost contact with my friend
>spent my adolescence basically playing old computer games that could run on my toaster
>no friends whatsoever
>around 19 (three years ago), I was admitted to a uni to study biological sciences
>living alone in a city where I don't know anyone since then
>I had never cooked before, but I learned it out of necessity and started to really like it
>work part-time at a molecular biology lab since my first months at uni (because I was one of the only biology student that knew how to do some basic scripting)
>published two papers by myself, co-authored 4 or 5
>received an award from a funding agency for my research
>worked with some japanese people on a project, maybe I will apply for a PhD in their research institute and live in weebland for a while
>I recently realized I don't care about biology (or science in general) anymore
>I'd be happy running a small restaurant or a bar instead, but I'm not willing to take the risk of opening a business of my own

[Anonymous No.9874342]

>grow up in suburban LA
>working class immigrant parents from basque country
>spend my days at grandparents' house while parents work, watching TV all day, wandering around the neighborhood, sitting in driveway and listening to the trains in the distance
>passive, uneventful childhood marred by vague loneliness i couldn't yet articulate
>enter school, not popular, constantly humiliated through the years, liked by teachers
>show promise in language arts classes, learn to love reading, writing, language itself
>mother with emotional issues, "disciplined" me as i grew up to be a sensitive, impressionable kid
>lose belief in God when my prayers for her to stop or change arent answered
>beatings culminate in a day of straight up torture, not allowed to sit or sleep after being getting the shit beat of me for hours
>henceforth alienated from peers and family, feeling depressed, mother tries to convince i'm autistic
>don't go out, spend hours on the internet throughout middle school and high school
>learn to be beside myself, learn classical guitar, read, sing, watch films
>wait for the day i'll be free
>study and get full ride to university on the east coast to study literature
>taking engaging classes, meeting new people
>go on a school-funded trip to florence in the winter
>sit down next statue of david
>girl sits down next to me, introduces herself, studies art history
>we talk about the david, then our lives and interests
>throughout the trip, we go on walks, read next to each other
>go to museums, she explains the art to me, giving me detailed accounts of their history and the various materials used to produce them
>last night in florence, she takes my virginity
>return to school, be friends for a little while, start dating
>nice, beautiful, intelligent, sympathetic to me when troubling feelings resurface
>she graduates a year earlier, gets good job in the city
>dating 3 yrs, move in together, slowly building life
>psychedelic therapy
>feeling good
>feeling the One

[Anonymous No.9874358]

>>9874250
>Ham on rye
Thanks I guess

[Anonymous No.9874370]

>Be Me.
>Dad was this big wig, mom was this spiritual fucking weirdo who only taught me all this spiritual shit.
>Dad was cool, gave me a lot of practical advise.
>Dad was murdered when I was a teenager, was not cool.
>I got mixed up with drugs, actually my mom started doing them with me.
>Hooked up with these weirdo spiritual arab types.
>Became their ruler.
>I made a war on the galactic empire and won, became emperor myself.
>Still do TONS of fucking drugs now.
>Shit's pretty cash.

[Anonymous No.9874383]

>>9873893
>Don Quixote, but with anime and manga instead of romantic knight tales

INB4 someone recommends Don Quixote

[Anonymous No.9874392]

The narcissism in this thread is nauseating.

[Anonymous No.9874393]

okay get ready

>teenage pregnancy
>dumped by parents
>forced to move back in with parents
>both are very violent and eventually divorce eachother
>general chaotic family life with everyone abusing eachother
>drop out of school because of it
>run away
>somehow get into uni but drop out because I have schizophrenia now
>also im a trans girl

[Anonymous No.9874410]

>grow up in suburbs with a few close friends
>start talking to a big group of new people, less and less time for old friends
>had a great time, met up with them almost every day for two years, just hung out and enjoyed each others' company
>everyone drifts apart and moves away for college, old friends are no longer interested in talking since I dropped them
>no friends for a year, end up developing pretty bad anxiety and can no longer manage simple social situations
>meet a girl in a similar position by complete chance, spend the best five years of my life with her, put her first in every situation and both help each other overcome our problems
>she decides she's bored and breaks up with me (5 years in)
>completely broken, no friends or anyone to talk to, depression led to me losing my job
>sit at home and read all day to distract myself from reality

[Anonymous No.9874464]

>At once as far as Angels kenn he views,
>The dismal Situation waste and wilde,
>A Dungeon horrible, on all sides round,
>As one great Furnace flam'd, yet from those flames,
>No light, but rather darkness visible,
>Serv'd onely to discover sights of woe,
>Regions of sorrow, doleful shades, where peace,
>And rest can never dwell, hope never comes,
>That comes to all; but torture without end,
>Still urges, and a fiery Deluge, fed,
>With ever-burning Sulphur unconsum'd.

[Anonymous No.9874478]

>grew up autistic af
>afraid of almost all social interaction
>started to drink
>broke down my inhibitions
>joined a fraternity
>now just an akward friendly guy

[Anonymous No.9874494]

>>9873921
>>9873963
>>9873988
>>9874001
>>9874013
>>9874018
>>9874061
>>9874087
>>9874121
>>9874125
>>9874126
>>9874204
>>9874218
>>9874269
>>9874336
>>9874339
>>9874342
>>9874370
>>9874393
>>9874410
>>9874464
>>9874478
tldr

[Anonymous No.9874497]

>>9873963
mate, i'm the same as you. but i'm currently only at step 4

[Anonymous No.9874530]

>>9874106
>posts on a board dedicated to the arts
>actively discourages people from creating art

[Anonymous No.9874535]

>>9874494
no

[Anonymous No.9874647]

>grew up in suburbs in Florida
>siblings and I are extremely intellectual
>parents value education but are pragmatic, see intellectualism as a waste of time
>do well in school
>become depressed in high school
>pursue science in university, fail to apply self because muh nihilism
>attempt suicide twice
>take ayahuasca and LSD before graduating, completely change philosophy and outlook
>currently committed to bettering self, affirming life

[Anonymous No.9874751]

>grow up in small town, midwest, good family, well off
>fairly social, lots of friends despite not being religious in small town usa
>go to school for engineering, mostly focus on school, put social life on hold, had a couple hook ups, couple relationships
>do long distance with gf i met on summer internship.
>graduate, no debt, move to northwest, move in with girl, marry girl.
>life still feels empty at times, but im pretty happy for the most part.

[Anonymous No.9875075]

>>9874647
If you want to better yourself, I recommend The Lost Art of Listening. It's a great guide on how to be not just compassionate, but helpfully so.

>>9874751
Try What It Is: The Formless Thing Which Gives Things Form. It's a comic, but it's also a great work on creativity. A bit hard to parse, wonky formats, but if you really absorb it then it's a great way to add fulfillment and new experience to your life by meditating on how let your ideas flow into art.

There's a lot more to suggest, but I'm on my phone so I'll write 'em up later. Same with my life.

[Anonymous No.9875118]

>ugly in middle school
>go to all girls high school
>gay relationship with hot nihilist
>she leaves for college
>fall in love with ten years older man
>abusive relationship
>move to city
>meaningless sex with hipsters
>applying for grad schools for critical theory
>likes hiking, watercolors, usually is depressed piece of shit

[Anonymous No.9876035]

>>9875075
Thanks for the recommendation, I'll check it out. I've always enjoyed literature and art, but they've come to mean a lot to me since graduating and working.

[Anonymous No.9876056]

>>9873893
>Started with the Greeks
>Descended into banality
>Ended with the Greeks

[Anonymous No.9876076]

>born in US
>family leaves country at age five
>come back to US at age 7
>grow up in town with a bunch of skinhead gangs
>family moves halfway through highschool to nice suburban neighborhood with a bunch of jews and chinese people
>highschool ends leave country cuz restless as fug, join up with some religious shit for a year
>decide i dont believe in god and come back to US
>try community college, it's shit
>get restless again, leave country and join a foreign military
>doesn't go so well, finish service two years later
>start working all kinds of odd jobs in that same country
>become interested in orthodox christianity
>start going to church
>not convinced
>get interested in all kinds of esoteric shit
>start working at some Wolf of Wallstreet type scam thing cuz LOL FUCK MORALITY
>i can't handle ripping people off, and lying, so i quit after a month and a half
>move back to US
>join esoteric type group
>two semesters of community college, doing really well
>third semester, too busy reading and studying my own interests
>dont give a fuck about school anymore, completely fail (parents dont know yet)
>still havent signed up for next semester classes
well shit

[Anonymous No.9876084]

>>9876076
Cuck

[Anonymous No.9876090]

>>9873893
>I am sitting in the morning
>at the diner on the corner
>I am waiting at the counter for the man to pour the coffee
>and he fills it only halfway
>and before I even argue he is looking out the window at somebody coming in
>"It is always nice to see you" says the man behind the counter to the woman who has come in
>she is shaking her umbrella
>and I look the other way as they are kissing their hellos
>I'm pretending not to see them and Instead I pour the milk
>I open up the paper
>there's a story ff an actor who had died while he was drinking
>it was no one I had heard of
>and I'm turning to the horoscope and looking for the funnies when I'm feeling someone watching me
>and so I raise my head
>there's a woman on the outside looking inside
>does she see me?
>no she does not really see me cause she sees her own reflection
>and I'm trying not to notice that she's hitching up her skirt
>and while she's straightening her stockings her hair has gotten wet
>oh, this rain it will continue through the morning as I'm listening to the bells of the cathedral
>I am thinking of your voice
>and of the midnight picnic once upon a time before the rain began
>I finish up my coffee and it's time to catch the train

[Anonymous No.9876099]

>>9876084
Is that a book recommendation?

[Anonymous No.9876287]

>>9874342
this sounds really delightful, I'm glad everything is working out for you anon :)

[Anonymous No.9876469]

>he has potential to live up to
>he doesn't want to live up to it

[Anonymous No.9876500]

>>9873893
>22
>grew up broke
>did shitty in school
>enlisted in the Muhreens
>got hazed, beat up some muslims, did some hazing
>been out almost a year now, miss my friends, have a hard time making new ones
>emotionally retarded, can't connect with any women unless I'm paying them
>going to school but don't know what for
>like weed

Just waiting for El Presidente to start a war so I can reenlist and hopefully die this time around

[Anonymous No.9876554]

>>9874126
how the fuck do you go from nietzsche to eastern philosophy and "enlightenment"? it's douchebags like you who give nietzsche a bad name

[Anonymous No.9876630]

>>9873893
>5 years old
>Son of well off and intelligent folk
>Get prescribed high doses of amphetamines for ADHD
>Become robot
>Lose all friends at school
>Shut out everyone by grade 8
>Become ungodly edgy
>Don't feel like part of family anymore
>Family totally apathetic to me being so miserable
>This feeling continues until age 16 when I go off the meds
>Self medicate with massive amounts of alcohol I rip off from stores
>Get tested , turns out I have an IQ of 121, (still) ADHD and dysthymia, w
>Even without the depression I'm told that it's always going to be hard for me to relate/communicate with other people.
>Kick the booze
>Age 19 and I haven't had "friends" since I was 12
>Live at home , virgin, /fit/ but still an edgy and jaded autist
I have no future and have distanced myself so far from normal life that I'm probably never going to make it back.

Suprise me

[Anonymous No.9876633]

>>9876500
The Way of Men, Jack Donovan

[Anonymous No.9876646]

>>9874647
>Needs to take drugs to have an epiphany
Maybe read a Bible?

[Anonymous No.9876678]

>Grew up feeling smart because I read faster than everyone else
>Be a self righteous kid who gets the higher grades
>Teachers always say "why can't you be more like anon?"
>Be smug, yet I'm socially retarded
>Always wanted to have a gf, but actually too shy to get one
>In middle school start to get fucked in the head and get extreme anxiety for no reason
>turns out I'm bipolar
>change schools because too embarassed to deal with the way I acted before I got diagnosed
>In highschool my grades become almost below average
>people think I'm rebellious and smart because I write funny smart stuff but I'm just edgy and depressed
>read a lot of stuff (russians, greeks, Joyce, continental philosophy, etc)
>still managed to get into college (meme degree, comp sci)
>depressed, few friends, hate my career, a bit obnoxious, virgin, pseudo-intellectual, angry and 20

[Anonymous No.9876680]

>28 years old
>9th grade drop out, with G.E.D
>Work as a welder from the ages of 18-23
>Do lots of drugs, feel lonely and live with my cousin who is a convict
>Join Army
>Deploy to Afghanistan, read a ton but mostly fiction. Dan Brown and other normie shit.
>Still in the Army as a Sergeant, that bangs prostitutes and drinks all the time.
>Still lonely

[Anonymous No.9876694]

>>9876090
>Cozy song

[Anonymous No.9876826]

>>9876633
>The Way of Men, Jack Donovan

I'll check it out

[Anonymous No.9876901]

In general: if you want to read literature to improve yourself, taking books with a bleak, nihilistic outlook is probably not the smartest thing you can do. If you are a 25 year old poor virgin NEET with obesitas, reading depressing shit like Céline, Camus or Pessoa is not going to help. Read books by writers who found a goal in life, like Proust (who learnt to cope with life by his art, cf. Le temps retrouvé) or Tolstoy (the examples of Konstantin Levin and Pierre Bezukhov in Anna Karenina and War and Peace, found peace in religion and country life) or T. S. Eliot (in Ash Wednesday, Murder in the Cathedral and the Four Quartets, devoted his life to tradition and religion).

[Anonymous No.9877050]

>>9873921
the stranger- camus / god bless you mr rosewater - vonnegut
>>9873963
a rebours - huysman
>>9873987
frankenstein - shelley + berlitz
>>9874006
bouvard + pecuchet - flaubert
>>9874018
the third policeman - o'brien
>>9874061
cannery row/sweet thursday -steinbeck
>>9874087
the way of all flesh -butler
>>9874125
daddy-long-legs - webster
>>9874126
queen lucia - ef benson
>>9874204
marnie -graham
>>9874218
the spy who came in from the cold -lecarré
>>9874336
pnin -nabokov

[Anonymous No.9877057]

>father killed himself
>have isolated myself throughout my life, even in kindergarten
>contrarian pseudo-intellectual
>have no ambition
I've already read a confederacy of dunces/mishima/dostoevsky/dazai/bible so please don't rec those.

[Anonymous No.9877284]

>grew up in afflluent suburb
>Parents divorce when I am in kindergarten. All of the money goes away, great up working class with wealthy peers
>Start drugs at 16
>Would love to take Adderall and read all day, which filled me with a craving for literary euphoria
>Become obsessed with the idea of writing the perfect book
>Filled with a vague dream of changing the world with my writing
>Suffer from delusions of grandeur
>Write alot of garbage
>Quit the Adderall after a few nasty episodes which I won't mention
>Around the same time my father's life fell apart, wasn't much I could do about it
>Sell vast amounts of Xanax throughout my last year of high school, I guess some interesting situations happened. I befriended several addicts and dying people.
>Get robbed one night
>Kid doesn't have a gun so I pretty much scare him off with empty threats
>When I'm selling acid a few months later I pull up to meet a friend of mine and the kid who robbed me is in the passenger seat
>He goes on a rant about how he thought I was a good kid, apologizes profusely
>I call him scum, call the person who brought us there to meet scum as well
>Gave them the acid for some reason as I laid out the most ridiculously passionate hate speech towards them
>The next morning I see a million "RIP" posts about him on twitter.
>He killed himself on my tabs
>Never knew how to feel about that situation. I've been in those situations on acid where youre not sure if you're going to be able to be sane or even live normally after going through the trip, like being a scared bleeding animal backed up into a corner.

[Anonymous No.9877297]

>>9877284
>>Quit the Adderall after a few nasty episodes which I won't mention
please mention

[Anonymous No.9877326]

>be me
>parents are divorced
>living with my mother and my brothers
>father is an alcoholic
>be shy
>be fat
>mother becomes a cripple
>get fatter
>get bullied at school
>had no real friends
>brothers be like strangers to me
>become fatter year by year
>actually start avoiding going to school because of the bullying
>become even fatter
>dropped out of school without graduaton
>NEET for 2 years
>mother died
>become depressed
>NEET for 5 more years
>Suicidethoughts coming through my mind
>father died
>NEET for 2 more years
>be me now
>fatter than ever
>still a NEET
>literally never worked a single day in my life
>literally 0 contact to people in reality
>brothers avoiding me
>thinking about suicide everyday

[Anonymous No.9877357]

>>9874001
Your life sounds both horrible and dope at the same time, I'd suggest Kafka for bureaucratic themes but you probably already read him
>>9874121
Nice shitpost
>>9874218
You get Kafka as well
>>9874393
Orlando - Virginia Woolf
>>9877326
I really don't wanna suggest something depressing to you, maybe try read the meditations and embrace the stoic meme

[Anonymous No.9877413]

> 25
> have two master's
> work a non-fulfilling, so-boring-it-makes-you-suicidal financial consulting job
> no sexual frustration from wanking to 2d waifus
> enjoy reading and having a simple life outside of work
> highest risk atm is stagnation

[Anonymous No.9877418]

>>9877326
with what money do live on ?

[Anonymous No.9877422]

>>9876630

The Little Prince, Saint-Exupéry

[Anonymous No.9877429]

>>9877297
I had an episode where I had a heat flash (in an instant my head went from being completely dry to drenched in sweat) and I vomited for an hour straight.
Another episode I jerked off for so long that my penis became swollen and couldn't touch it for weeks afterwards
Also generally the comedown and the feeling the next day was the number one issue that made me realize taking it was unsustainable

[Anonymous No.9877434]

>>9877284
Taipei

>>9877057
Map and Territory

>>9876680
In Storms of Steel
and then
On the Marble Cliffs

Ok I only thought of that because you’re a soldier desu.

>>9876678
The Pale King, if you haven’t read that already

>>9876630
Taipei :^
(wanna be friends btw?)
ok I’ll try surprising…
Max Frisch: Gantenbein

>>9876090
Book of Disquiet

>>9876076
The Adventurous Heart

[Anonymous No.9877439]

>>9877418
Welfare

[Anonymous No.9877446]

>No significant memories of time before 12 years old.
>Except that I enjoy many times being in nature and national parks. I think if there was any calling, it was the call of the wild. Haha.
>Unfortunately develop an agoraphobic tendency during high school.
>Thought process is shallow, obsessive and highly critical of others, even more than the self.
>Through anxiety and childhood interest in epidemics I develop a fetishistic obsession for disease and malnutrition.
>By 2011 I have integrated into magick thought processes and collect, realizing it's not physical but a manifestation of desire, my own diseases and biological imperfections via pee bottles, plastic bags containing the vapor of coughs, and rank plastic containers of dabs of irregular fluids. I also let molds, dusts and vermin live freely within my corner of the house to attract pestilence.
>2014 Ebola chan comes along and I dedicate myself to this and other creative forms of hysteria rituals even today.
>That's it. I am shallow and obsessive and a dumb NEET who enjoys being sick.

[Anonymous No.9877460]

>>9877446
Oblomov

[Anonymous No.9877465]

>>9873963
Stoner

[Anonymous No.9877484]

>first memories start at age 6
>play a lot of video games with friends in real life until age 12
>amount of school friends I have dwindle
>play a lot of video games with online friends until age 17
>during college I only have online friends
>play a lot of video by myself until age 23
>earn my degree and start looking for a job

this feels so stereotypical

[Anonymous No.9877498]

>middle class average looking normal child
>kidnapped and tortured at age 7
>raped at age 16
>college dropout
>living with family
>problems with alcoholism
>only 20 years old

[Anonymous No.9877530]

>wealthy family, careerist father
>move all over the world throughout childhood
>speak five languages, receive great education, but never feel rooted anywhere
>no sense of home, identity or direction
>grow accustomed to losing all my friends at the drop of a hat every few years
>first times suck, especially when still very young
>eventually become apathetic and detached towards others
>learn to make friends easily, but don't care about losing them
>develop the indifference into a kind of sadism
>sometimes ruin friendships and relationships just out of a sense of curiosity
>sleep with friends' girlfriends out of spite and megalomania, just to show i can
>eventually drop out of uni because i hate all of my classmates and never go anyway
>aimlessly solotravel around the world
>fantasise about becoming a monk and giving myself to god
>chainsmoke
>drink
>write poems at night

[Anonymous No.9877538]

Ok I’ll greentext mine too, though I don’t think it’s so interesting

>be me
>born to unmarried parents
>nice childhood with few but close friends
>father leaves for mother of a friend when I’m in second grade
>lose all friends in/after elementary school, for different reasons (couldn’t go to same school as I / moved away / girls moved on to having only girls as friends)
>fall for the "nice guys are the best" meme my mother spouts and join the losers in 5th/6h grade
>they’re boring as hell and we never meet after school, only great guy leaves in 6th grade because his attitude/grades don’t fit with the school
>start playing StarCraft online, first thing I ever really am not good at, although I want to be (have always been seen as "genius" in school and my parents didn’t want me to skip classes so it stayed that way)
>mother has always been overprotective, starts becoming an issue now that I hit puberty, won’t leave me alone
>get depressed being at home all the time, lurking oti, being terrorized by mother who won’t honor a single request to keep physical/emotional distance from me
>other StarCraft losers oti become my best friends now
>start throwing my life away with WoW as it comes out, you know how it goes

>tfw no gf

>fall for uni meme, at least I can move out now, get away from my mother
>uni forces me to do pointless assignments I could always get away with skipping in school
>stop going after a few weeks
>yea guess my life is pointless anyways, let’s become an alcoholic and read books and shit
>next semester switch from CS to art/music/philosophy/latin because I need state bucks and humanities faculty is way less strict
>actually come in contact with girls
>too much spaghetti in pockets to get gf, also still in want-to-throw-life-away mode
>read The Magic Mountain, somehow changes my whole attitude
>make insane drug addict girl off *chan my gf
>now that I have gf I’m not hopeless anymore and want to get my life in order
>don’t try this at home
>move in with her
>she’s still in want-to-throw-life-away mode
>she’s schizophrenic and doesn’t want treatment because she owns three large books by Foucault

Anyhow that didn’t end well, but I went on trying to improve my life and now have another gf and have a well paying job and throw money at crypto and read a book occasionally; and sometimes I’m not sure whether this is what I wanted, whether I wouldn’t have rather become a lit bum with less comfort but more time to read and maybe to write.
Probably I’ll go on like this, living a normal live, being relatively happy, while the sting slowly vanishes.

[Anonymous No.9877543]

>constantly moving from one place to the other as a child, never lived at the same place for more than 5 years,lived in multiple places in my country and in the neighbouring country too (Europe)
>relatively normal highschool life,friends,gfs,ect.
>go to Uni,gf at the time breaks up with me, get depressed
>smoking a lot of weed
>weed makes me more depressed,apathy for the whole excistence of the planet since in the grand scheme of things everything is meaningless
>weed makes me lazy, smoking 24/7, too high too do anything,stay in my apartment and sleep all day long
>getting bored with weed, quit cold turkey
>getting into some eastern philosophy,acid and self-improvement
>come to terms with things that were bothering me and holding me back
>stop using drugs all together, except cigarettes and caffeine
>get motivated for the future, want to become an interpreter
>start working for a year in order to have money so I can go back studying
>22 now,will move back to the capital next month

[Anonymous No.9877596]

>only child
>artsy parents
>poor but didn't realize it
>good kid who never got in trouble and always did homework
>parents got real jobs (professors), not poor anymore
>bullied in school
>became the funny guy and the bullying stopped
>stopped caring about school
>dick around in community college for a few years
>transfer to university because mom is professor there which makes my tuition cheap
>shitty student, mostly Bs and Cs
>realize that most of my old friendships from school are not really real
>so fucking lonely

[Anonymous No.9877609]

>>9877530
holy fuck grow up dude

[Anonymous No.9877662]

>>9877446
Fascinating. In "Rumo: And His Miraculous Adventures", the second part takes places in an underground kingdom that worships sickness. Though the tone is a bit light-hearted, might be relevant to your interests.

>>9877498
Book of Job

>>9877530
>sleep with friends' girlfriends out of spite and megalomania, just to show i can
nice
Until the last few lines, your life sounds like a BEE cliché. If one of your five languages is German by any chance, I’ll recommend Kracht’s "1979".
Other than that, maybe reading accounts of Krasznahorkai’s (Seiobo, Prisoner of Urga) or Ransmeyer’s or Chatwin’s travels could inspire yours, though you sound like you’re rather bored of the whole affair already.

>>9877543
Nice, a not entirely depressing one.
I’ll just recommend Master and Margerita.

>>9877596
Read DFW already?
I somehow want to recommend "Mars" by Fritz Zorn as well.

[Anonymous No.9877681]

>>9873893
>i came
>i saw
>i wait for the final chapter

[Anonymous No.9877692]

>>9874001
post office

[Anonymous No.9877693]

>>9876287
thanks buddy. i wish the same for you

[Anonymous No.9877745]

>>9874204
Neuromancer
The Savage Detectives

>>9874218
Laxness: Under the Glacier
Lowry: Under the Volcano

>>9874269
Eeee Eee Eeeee
Bed

>>9874339
:) gz on your success
recs:
Murakami because of Weebland and cooking and bar opening (if you haven’t read him already)
Houellebecq: Atomized (more depressing) or Map and Territory (less depressing)

[Anonymous No.9877760]

>>9877439
classic

[Anonymous No.9877765]

>>9873893
>30
>cook in a poor neighborhood restaurant
>sleeping with co-worker while having a girlfriend
>depressed

[Anonymous No.9877769]

>>9877530
You're a filthy scumbag and I hope you die in a very painful manner.

[Anonymous No.9877834]

>>9874342
:) seconding the "nice" poster
I’ll recommend Krasznahorkai because of your love of art and language. If you’ve already read "Seiobo There Below", definitely read "The World Goes on" and "From the North by Hill, From …" as well. (What he published before 1990 is grim as hell btw.)
Maybe Mann’s Doktor Faustus could be a good book for you as well, though it is plain depressing in a way.

>>9874370
Naked Lunch, my man
Blue Lines on Transparent Skin

>>9874393
IJ has a bunch of stories similar to yours, but I’m not sure that makes for a good recommendation.
Grunbergs "Saint Antony" comes to mind as a good one, but seems hard to find.

>>9874410
In a way I believe that if you just go on and read all the great classics, you’ll find something eventually that can give your life a new angle.

[Anonymous No.9877852]

>born the day after my brothers birthday
>calls me the worst present hes received
>mom starts binge drinking when I was two
>dad constantly gone on work meetings across the country, seldom ever home
>find out hes been cheating on my mum, denies it to this day
>showed interest in sports, but parents didn't want to invest their time in something I was good at
>brother never really speaks to me, but constant bullying
>make friends in school, but every year they leave or transfer to a different school
>spend a lot of recesses alone
>poor academically, but bright and have interests in sports, drama and literature
>called a 'fag' for the first time at age 8 by an adult
>held back a grade because teacher didn't teach us multiplication
>have constant stomach issues
>eventually have established group of friends but their interests are all video games and manga and I didn't really care for that
>brother stops talking to me, my dad and mom for 12 years
>teachers in high school publicly shame me, one calls me "useless" and thus becomes my nickname throughout high school
>still struggle academically but just scrape by through university
>work part time jobs wherein managers either threaten me, or straight up try to be violent towards me
>brother comes back out of the blue expecting everything to be fine
>quit part time jobs hoping to find a fulfilling career, but now been unemployed for a year and a half
>brother tries to convince me to come out to the West Coast, claiming he was going to buy a shoe-shop and we could co-manage it
>tell him I don't have enough money to do support myself out there yet
>tells me to kill myself and that I'll always be useless
>three weeks later he has a mental breakdown from consuming magic mushrooms and cannabis every day for 6 months and ends up in hospital
>parents go visit him
>I don't
>still can't find a job here, not even a barista job.

[Anonymous No.9877859]

>>9874647
Hesse

>>9874751
Maybe you should have a child.
Anyways, I recommend Lud-in-the-Mist.

>>9875118
Hi girl, please don’t study critical theory ok
recs:
The Book of Tea
The Left Hand of Darkness

[Anonymous No.9877862]

>>9877852
>held back a grade because teacher didn't teach us multiplication
kek, I’m sorry

>three weeks later he has a mental breakdown from consuming magic mushrooms and cannabis every day for 6 months and ends up in hospital
:^

Book of Disquiet

[Anonymous No.9877871]

>>9877862
Thanks, already read it. Increased my depression and loneliness

[Anonymous No.9877973]

>>9877434
Thanks anon

[Anonymous No.9878057]

> Outsider and slightly depressed since before kindergarden
> Do well in school but don't put in any effort
> In fact, as soon as it becomes imaginable what this will lead to in the long term I stop doing anything
> Accumulate intermediate proficiency in several sports, instruments, and some other skill-based activities
> Never learn to know myself, tell myself that exploring is a waste of time and there is no reason to assume that other places or people should be more special
> Am now a 30-year old resident and hate the hours
> Shitpost here in my free time because I stopped having a social life after my last gf called it quits and the last contact with childhood friends ended after talking about pol topics with them
> Feel I could do anything but I just want to stay home and read all those books I will never find time to read

>>9874392
You must have low self esteem.

[Anonymous No.9878059]

>I was a shitty kid, didn't want to go to school, was given modern version of thorazine (risperdal) from 8-14
>never started high school, lived neet life until 19, no friends except some pothead I kept in touch with in middle school
>work at computer shop, eventually discover darknet markets, buy lots of LSD and quit my job
>after a few years of tripping, loneliness gets so bad I get hospitalized after threatening suicide on acid
>meet toothless crackhead in the psych ward, lose virginity at age 23
>have horrible abusive relationship with crackhead for 10 months until she violates her probation and goes back to jail
>at 24 I work for an airliner, pass the time reading books, smoking lots of cigarettes and abusing Adderall

[Anonymous No.9878123]

>born into a poor family
>dad was a labourer and mum was a stay-at-home who cleaned houses on the side
>i’m the youngest, i have two brothers and a sister; all are older by over a decade
>childhood was great, i was very naive and unaware of family problems
>never knew my dad was an alcoholic and mum was clinically depressed
>mediocre at most things in primary school except computers, video games occupy 100% of my time
>"under-the-radar" type for all primary school, low-key funny though
>around 6th grade, 2 years before high school, i wrote an article-format review about the boy in striped pyjamas
>teachers were baffled by my writing skill, called my parents, informed the principal, paraded around by the school, etc.
>seeds of writing career planted
>1 year later, diagnosed with the type 1 beetus, seeds of depression planted
>meander through all of high school depressed, still under the radar, achieving A marks consistently in english but failing most other subjects
>i think my marks in legal studies and studies of society were pretty good too
>only one or two teachers take an interest in me, try to cultivate my "natural talent”
>doesn’t really amount to anything except winning english awards and local writing competitions
>somehow elected school captain in year 12 because i rapped my application speech to my grade (great memory)
>still under the radar somehow
>made 1 friend the whole time
>graduate high school and go into a dual bachelor of business/arts degree
>arts is smooth-sailing, achieving fantastic marks, one of my tutors wants to explore my talents, go into a major of creative writing
>business was a shit-fest. lecture hall had 500+ cunts in it, impossible to focus. failed every assignment
>suddenly arts degree assignments turn into group assignments. social skills 1/10, fail every assignment from that point on
>drop out of uni
>currently 19, addicted to smoking, all i do is work, read infrequently, and call myself a writer when really i haven’t written anything proper in probably over a year and i’ve squandered any natural talent i could work with
>girlfriend is nice and work pays okay, so i don’t really complain about things
>recently found solace in surrealist and sci-fi works, hoping to one day to throw away grievances with myself and write again in those genres
>generally thinking about death and my place in the universe, not sure of either and not sure if i want to be sure
>mum is now full-blown depressed, my sister is a barista, my brothers have estranged themselves from my father, who's no longer an alcoholic so much but is suffering the consequences of 2 heart attacks now

i think that’s everything, on paper it seems a lot less book-worthy

[Anonymous No.9878172]

>>9878123
should also mention
>late childhood and teen years, heavily into habbo
>socialise through the star wars role-play there, form the jensaarai faction
>it was great, i felt a genuine brotherhood amongst the likeminded 6-7 other guys in that faction
>i loved the secrecy of our faction, we were universally disliked but everyone truly wanted to be one of us
>defined a great portion of my young years

[Anonymous No.9878632]

>>9874001
well, if that interests you, Kierkegaard firmly believed that he was going to die when he was 33 yo, like the Christ, but then he didn't

[Anonymous No.9878672]

>grew up in the suburbs
>had a few friends but mostly spent time studying or doing some kind of volunteer work
>never drank, partied, or did drugs
>mom was a schizo, dad spent all of his time working
>she stopped taking medication near the end of my sophomore year in high school and outright refused any medical treatment, became verbally abusive and drank heavily
>started failing my classes, most friends stopped talking to me
>didn't really know what to do, so went to a community college for a few years
>then transferred to a state college
>made few friends, kept in contact with a handful
>majored in biochemistry and graduated recently
>have had little luck finding a job because I have little experience
>now currently work park-time for shit pay

time to an hero

[Anonymous No.9878718]

More than anything I want to die, but there's no cause worth expending my life on.

[Anonymous No.9878731]

>ask people to describe their lives
>they describe their nondescript and completely average childhoods and gradeschool years because their lives are worthless

There, now just give a single blanket work to read and don't waste time perusing these masturbatory posts.

[Anonymous No.9878921]

>>9878123
Fight Club, The Way of Men, Beyond Good and Evil.

[Anonymous No.9878932]

>27yo
>try to be an artist but to afraid to choose a subject
>draw myself dozens of times instead
>it still looks like shit

[Anonymous No.9879180]

bump

[Anonymous No.9879203]

>sheltered childhood
>at university studying physics
>lazy
>no job
>bored with degree, searching for meaning/purpose

[Anonymous No.9879316]

>>9873893
>first generation born after fall of iron curtain in Czechoslovakia
> firts day at middle school fall in love with female classmate but to shy/autist to make a move for whole teen years
>spending whole teen years dreaming about her and trying to find a way how to impres
>start shiting on school and taunting teachers
to the point I had to change school
>like books
>lost contact with a few schoolmates except one
>new school, again total autist but this time working with teachers to pass the school
>one day met the mentioned girl and kissed her like a creep
>her boyfriend roast the shit out of me
> pass the schoole still no new friends
>go on uni, give up after first semester
>go for a year study english on small private school, start writting fantasy short stories for hack of it (thousand words every two days)
>still no new firends but I had started visiting gym
>go for uni for second time a gave up after two moths
>start running and lifting
> learned basic welding from my father and made first welding certificate
>now 22 years old, have a fit body, working as a welder in small workshop, and you know what? I was never more happy than there working my ass of, welding with headphones playing metal or audiobooks
> planing to move out from parents and making more profesionalization in welding

[Anonymous No.9879505]

>Slept through HS not caring about grades
>Didn't go to college cause "I don't need that for my career"
>lost the 2 jobs i was working at the same time
>21 yo virgin
>sleeps through the days and drinks through the nights
>don't think i'll make it

[Anonymous No.9879531]

>19
>haven't done shit in my life
>no proper education
>outsider till age 15
>anxious as fuck
>poor as fuck
>ugly as shit
>my dad's an alcoholist
>everyone i know thinks that i'm either an underachiever or mentally retarded because i can't do anything properly what comes to getting my life together

[Anonymous No.9879610]

>19
>had a shitty childhood, i grew up in a broken home
>my dad's an alcoholic
>my family never had that much money
>i was an outsider till age 15, no house parties or anything like that
>no proper education, my old friends are going to universities and i just waste my time everyday in my shitty apartment
>dropped out from different schools couple of times and my relatives think that i'm probably mentally retarded because of that
>anxious as fuck, the main reason why my studying never works out
>also kinda depressed
>i'm overall struggling with my mental health
>tired of trying what comes to getting my life together because i always fail
>i still have a lot of goals and dreams and i really want to pursue them but i don't know how

[Anonymous No.9879641]

>>9879316

Norman Mailer

[Anonymous No.9879665]

>grew up in southern usa suburbs
>despised school growing up
>wanted to be a programmer
>go to liberal arts school on west coast
>became a comparative literature major with a big interest in philosophy
>did LSD a lot and am paranoid often now
>depressed
>have a small group of friends but sometimes I can't trust them
>fighting with some of my old friends back home since they like Jordan Peterson
>only dated twice, last relationship ended more than a year ago

[Anonymous No.9879669]

>molested at age 6
>caught having sex with male friend at 13
>had sex with male cousin (not caught)
>identify as straight
>sadist, horrible sexual fantasies
>wants a virgin gf

[Anonymous No.9879987]

>>9879669
Confusions of Young Törless

[Anonymous No.9880015]

>>9874121
>I didn't read the endnotes: the post

[Anonymous No.9880164]

>>9873893
Won't greentext my life..but I'll greentext something major in my life I've only recently discovered:

>2 years ago
>go to my cousins cottage with my cousins' uncle (i consider him my uncle, even though we aren't related,)
>their cousins are also there (the ones not related to me)
>2 are girls my age, one is my 'uncles' daughter
>mfw I was extremely /fit/ that summer -- best shape of my life
>uncle's daughter showing interest while playing Frisbee golf
>end up shagging multiple times a day over the week we were there.
>go back home and think nothing of it

Fast forward 1 year:

>order DNA test because it seems cool
>mom is Greek, Dad is German
>DNA comes back Greek and Scottish
>keep it silent for a few months
>get paternity test with my dad (parents are divorced)
>youarenotthefather.gif
>dad tells me I'll always be his son
>mom spills the beans. Find out she used to date my "uncle"
>he's Scottish. Scottish last name.
>look at pictures... he's got the same headshape, same teeth, same eyes and nose.
>look at his daughter -- see similarities
>Tell my uncle, and get a paternity test.
>my "uncle" is now my father
>tell him to keep it on the down low, but cat is already out of the bag.
>mfw I boned my half-sister and everyone knows it

[Anonymous No.9880285]

>>9874248
nice

[Anonymous No.9880317]

>born
>happy family
>one brother
>play videogames
>go to school
>sister is born
>play more videogames
>do more school
>reach puberty
>jerk off nonstop for years
>really wanna fuck a dirty hippie girl
>pretend to be a stoner in college
>fuck multiple dirty hippie girls
>get HPV
>born Catholic but strayed from the faith
>consider myself an eclectic perennialist
>do acid once a week for three years
>end up in a psych ward after doing some weird rituals on acid
>get prescribed meds
>don't like meds cause I'm anti-authoritarian and they want to make me think different
>meds take away my hobo magic
>get out of hospital
>stop taking meds
>chill for a while
>do acid again
>go crazy again
>get prescribed meds
>get off meds
>try to avoid acid and chill
>go crazy again
>get on meds and medicaid
>become a philosopher NEET
>live in cheap housing and spend all money on weed and books
>no craziness since
>guess it's meds for life

[Anonymous No.9880462]

>>9873893

>Shithead kid
>Mellow out around highschool
>Always get high grades without giving a fuck
>People say I'm weird but never elaborate
>Stay single, crazy bitches love me
>Graduate well, go to uni for something fancy
>Drop out because money
>Date cute girl from HS for several months when I get back
>Get a job but leave because it sucks
>She leaves, I stop giving a fuck
>NEET ever since

[Anonymous No.9880515]

>>9873893
>normal, moderately poor rural alabama childhood.
>did lots of dangerous shit with my brother, cousins, and other local people
>books af
>get a bit older
>make a decision to try all the drugs after seeing some hood shit
>plan to join military once i graduate
>instead full scholarship and i go from my libertarian to my "progressive" phase
>did drugs way too hard and broke into a house
>felon
>hate filled drug addict who thought it was funny to watch himself ruin his life day by day
>manage to stay in school (some goddam way) and (mostly) out of jail
>last semester this fall and i'll have my sociology bachelors and i'm on to my internship

[Anonymous No.9880558]

>Grew up and still have severe ("Severe") ADD
>Take 90 mg Adderall/day even now (23 yr)
>Grew up Hating people
> got bullied and listened to Metal
> grew out of that to love Saxophone and Classic Rock
> Grew out of that to Smoke weed and LARP as a Communist for a while (mid teens)
> Still played Sax
> Grew out of that and started to appreciate Jazz and Classical (Specifically Chopin)
> No more communism for me, thank you.
> While this is going on Started hitting the books really hard and got great at math and Science. (Math Specifically)
> 18 and developed a sense of nihilism so that I can take time to actually figure out what I really believe in. (Try every idea out in my head. Research and see decide for myself)
> Meenwhile I major in Aerospace Engineering in Uni
> I find remix music genres like Vaporwave and stupid shit like that interesting and I can appreciate them from time to time. Jazz is still best tho
> Got really fascinated with Ancient Roman Law, Philosophies, and general history.
> Now today, still nihilist while i figure out what I believe in.
Currently Reading:
HP Lovecraft's entire works (Lovecraft has great imagery, if I had to name one great thing about him)
SPQR by Mary Beard (Ancient Rome) (not sure about the author so far. We'll see)
Game of Thrones series (for fun)

> Still Playing sax and still ADD ridden
> 3rd Year Aerospace Engineer
thats it

[Anonymous No.9880605]

>>9880317
buddy tried to do a satanic ritual while i was tripping. We were around a bonfire and i swear to god the fire grew and the wind kicked up
It was creepy because the guy was /actually/ a satanist and was a really good showman (knew some latin shit and everything)

[Anonymous No.9880679]

>no mom
>no dad
>family of drug addicts
>joining the marines because i can't afford college

[Anonymous No.9880950]

>grow up in small town Kentucky
>spend childhood in suburbs
>preteens through high school living in the forest
>join army as paratrooper, serve overseas in genocide ravaged Bosnia
>get out of army do tons of LSD, make art, drink bourbon, bang chicks
>work as janitor in gay disco
>meet qt3.14
>take factory job
>have weird dream about science fiction story
>start writing science fiction story
>10 years pass. Got married, did college, finished story in 11 volumes/novels
>lose job at big factory after accident
>work at trucking company in gas shed to make ends meet
>shitpost on /lit/
>some anon calls me Gaskun
>name sticks, get called faget
>get better job. Still Gaskun.
>keep writing
>??????
>profit?

[Anonymous No.9880995]

>>9880605
Ya. Mine was just some new agey asking for a sort of intermediary or guide in my spiritual quest and I made contact with an entity and fell in love with it cuz I'm a sucker.

[Anonymous No.9881046]

>>9873893
>grew up that one weird autistic kid in every school
>actually had a few friends and wasn't as bad off with autism as some kids
>got a lot of bullying throughout life
>dad used to beat me silly
>always loved scifi and futurism, didn't get as into fantasy but still liked LoTR, Harry Potter, etc
>always was a computer nerd
>got into weeb shit in middle school, still watch animus sometimes
>love 80s music, classic rock, electronic, lo-fi, relaxing shit you'd find on soundcloud
>love games retro (like 2600 retro) to modern
>love classic film
>high moral standards but don't often live up to them (lol)
>old fashioned romantic, been laid a few times, don't really like reading romance or smut though.
>I don't mind reading stuff considered YA as long as it doesn't feel like it's catering to 14 year olds.
>found Holden Caulfield relatable
>hated being forced to interpret To Kill A Mockingbird in a certain way.
>already read Ready Player One.

recommend me some books please, been pretty bored.

[Anonymous No.9881103]

>>9881046
Post disposable email

[Anonymous No.9881106]

>>9873921
Oblomov

>>9873963
Damien

>>9873988
The Karamazov Brothers

>>9874001
Post Office

>>9874018
Notes from Underground

>>9874061
>>9880462
>>9880317

Infinite Jest

>>9874087
Death be Not Proud (non-fiction)

>>9874125
>>9879665
>>9879610
>>9879505
>>9879203
Anything by John Green

>>9874126
Oedipus Rex

>>9874204
The book of Job

>>9874218
Butcher's Crossing

>>9881046
A song of ice and fire

>>9880950
Illuminatus! Trilogy

>>9880679
Meditations

>>9880558
Anna Karenina

>>9880515
Asylum by William Seabrook

>>9879669
Pride and Prejudice

[Anonymous No.9881109]

>>9877434
>Book of Disquiet
A real answer? Now I have to read this, sounds interesting.

[Anonymous No.9881147]

>>9873893
I'll just regular text it

Disliked family a lot, for good reason they're kinda insane
Never felt related to my peers
Was forced to go to church twice a week, hated it
Brought up in catholic schools
Spent a lot of time in school going up and down stairwells to get peeks under those skirts
Got into Richard Dawkins just because I hated church so much
Eventually discovered Alan Watts who completely rewired my brain with his Out of Your Mind lecture series, which I listened to whilst in Japan for three months because
The programming on Toonami seemed like the coolest shit in town for me at the time
Outlaw Star, Tenchi Muyo, Neon Genesis, DBZ, Bebop, Trigun, etc
Turned me into a bit of a weeb, before I was aware of that word or any internet culture
Guy in high school introduced me to 4chan in 2005
Anyways meanwhile during high school lot of acne, incredibly ashamed of it, tried to keep my head rested into my arms during class as much as I could
Eventually realized I should stop drinking a ton of soda and eating sugar cereal (3 years later)
Hated school with an intensity that made me fantasize about arson daily (If I burned the school down, I wouldn't have to come to it anymore, right? = my thought process)
Went to college just because I wanted to get the fuck away from my family
Realized it was more school
Dropped out second year
Decided I wanted to do that "Teach English Abroad" thing in Japan mainly because it was a magical place to me at the time kind of still is
Went there for three months, enjoyed the hell out of it but also really hated how much I stood out, how much people stared, felt really out of place and obvious
back home again, got into reading heavily, occult, non-fiction, joyce, history, spirituality like krishnamurti or anthony de mello, watched anime and read manga the entire time
bought shrooms and cannabis edibles and LSD and mescaline off of the dark net as a means to try to kick-start some kind of spiritual evolution
didn't necessarily pan out but certainly opened me up to a lot of things that I don't think I would've been open to
ah, that whole time music has been the big thing for me, squarepusher, amon tobin, autechre, scriabin, prokofiev, ymo
and Chris fucking Clark
the guy on the warp label
his music is a part of my DNA now
totally in love with finnwake, bought all those books about it
got a nice shelf going about all sorts of varied things

[Anonymous No.9881172]

>>9881147
Since you read Joyce you've definitely read this, but are you aware how much your life is like a modernized version of A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man?

[Anonymous No.9881177]

>>9880950
Write a memoir someday Gaskun. Maybe in the vein of Chateaubriand. The NYRB version of his Memoirs from Beyond the Grave should be coming out sometime soon. also where can I read your stuff?

[Anonymous No.9881210]

>born in a small house in the redwoods of california
>moved to a much more rural and dry area when i was 4
>have one younger sister
>was homeschooled until 4th grade
>constantly bullied until 7th grade. had literally 1 friend. hes still my friend
>finally have friends and pretty popular at new middle school. really into skateboarding
>leave half way through 7th grade because of shit grades.
>start new school for half of 7th and 8th. make a couple really great friends and we do a lot of great stuff. stay in touch with one of them afterwards
>start high school at a very small college prep
>make a lot of friends who stay my friends for all of highschool and meet a lot of important people in my life
>start texting a girl in 9th grade and start a really weird relationship that lasts long
>end everything with that girl in 10th grade but realise im really in love with her
>sad all of 11th. dont really talk as much as i used to. get really into music
>12th grade is really cool though
>start talking to her in 12th again. she becomes one of my best friends
>still really in love with her though
>graduate and take a semester off to work and because i have no idea what i want to do
>go to uni in a really big city
>still have absolutely no idea why im in school or what im interested in
>getting good grades but havent met anyone in school that i'd actually consider a friend
>spend most of my time missing my friends, family, reminiscing over fun stuff i did in high school, and waiting for breaks to come around so i can see them

[Anonymous No.9881211]

>middle-upper class suburbia
>anxiety/extreme perfectionist
>made to see a child therapist at 5-6 because of this
>improve but still have anxiety-sef-esteem issues. at least i can function though
>dad dies while i'm in 2nd grade
>had some friends during school but never really felt like i belonged
>was pretty smart so tried to help people when I could. my only redeeming quality
>i was(/am?) that guy people liked but not enough to be proper/good friends with
>too self-conscious and awkward
>mostly keep to myself in my spare time
>currently 3rd year engineering student
>still don't fit in
>tfwnogf
>at least i have good grades :^)
>started reading /lit/ books a couple of years ago

[Anonymous No.9881230]

>middle-upper class suburbia
>anxiety/extreme perfectionist/OCD (was never told anything specifically)
>made to see a child therapist at 5-6 because of this.
>improve but still have anxiety-self-esteem issues. at least i can function though
>dad dies while i'm in 2nd grade
>had some friends during school but never really felt like i belonged
>was pretty smart so tried to help people when I could. my only redeeming quality
>i was(/am?) that guy people liked but not enough to be proper/good friends with
>too self-conscious and awkward
>mostly keep to myself in my spare time
>currently 3rd year engineering student
>still don't fit in
>never had a gf
>at least i have good grades :^)
>started reading /lit/ books a couple of years ago

[Anonymous No.9881334]

>>9881177
hes on Amazon under Fusion Heart in sci-fi

[Anonymous No.9881836]

>>9878057
The Other Side (Kubin)

>>9878059
Blue Lines on Transparent Skin

>>9878123
>>9878172
The Savage Detectives

>>9878672
The Magic Mountain

>>9878731
Yes, I think 90% of /lit/ could be recommended Book of Disquiet and be done with it.
But then, a number will have read it already, so I’m also trying to find other recommendations.

>>9878932
Leavetaking (Weiss)

>>9879203
DFW if you haven’t read him yet
Kafka: The Judgement (story)

>>9879316
Not such a bad story. I always dream of taking on a more physical job as well, feeling that just sitting in office all day hollows me out.
recs:
Anna Karenina
Book of the New Sun

>>9879505
Catcher
The Third Reich (Bolaño)

>>9879610
The Third Reich (Bolaño)

>>9879665
Taipei, Neuromancer, Omega Point (DeLillo)

>>9880164
Hehe nice story, siblings sure have the hots for each other if not Westermarck effect’d.
Don’t really know what to recommend you, maybe some Kundera, light-hearted shagger that you are?
Also Homo Faber if you want another great incest story.

>>9880317
Glad to know we got people like you posting on here.
I recommend some E.T.A. Hoffmann tales.

>>9880462
Cmon don’t give up on life like that~
The Nakano Thrift Shop

>>9880558
Intelligent, nihilistic, and with a wicked sense of humor!
Kracht: Imperium

>>9880950
When on a Winter’s Night a Traveler
Invisible Cities

>>9881046
Neuromancer trilogy if you haven’t read
City Come A-Walkin’ if you liked Neuro

>>9881147
César Aira: The Little Buddhist Monk
Krasznahorkai: From the North by Hill, From the South by Lake, …

>>9881210
Also wanna rec you John Green just for the heck of it now.
As a quality recommendation, maybe Atom Station by Laxness could be interesting for you.

>>9881230
IJ, Pale King, etc. if you haven’t
Also The Magic Mountain


Alright, time for breakfast.

[Anonymous No.9881934]

>>9877834

Who is IJ?

[Anonymous No.9881983]

>>9881934
Infinite Jest, by David Foster Wallace
(lurk more)

[Anonymous No.9882023]

>spent my childhood mostly playing alone, playing computer games, reading comic books, encyclopaedias and atlases for children, and some fantasy books
>later on only games and the internet
>never had a real friend, was bullied in shcool
>got into music later on, which lead me to art and literature
>stopped playing videogames around high school, started reading much more and listening to music, tried to write but failed at it, also started working out a bit
>was a serious buddhist for two years during high school, then got back into art and literature

nowadays
>spend my time mostly practising drawing and painting, after realizing that this is what I want to do in my life
>study a bullshit course (studying is free where I live) so that I don't have to work and can read and draw more
>spend my days drawing, reading and walking during the summer, during the academic year I draw, read on my commute, go to the uni, get back, read on commute, draw a bit, read and go to sleep.
>have realized that art is the only thing that really satisfies me, and that nothing can compare
>still shit at it, though

[Anonymous No.9882036]

>spent my childhood mostly playing alone, playing computer games, reading comic books, encyclopaedias and atlases for children, and some fantasy books
>later on only games and the internet
>never had a real friend, was bullied in shcool
>got into music later on, which lead me to art and literature
>stopped playing videogames around high school, started reading much more and listening to music, tried to write but failed at it, also started working out a bit
nowadays
>spend my time mostly practising drawing and painting, after realizing that this is what I want to do in my life
>study a bullshit course (studying is free where I live) so that I don't have to work and can read and draw more
>spend my days drawing, reading and walking during the summer, during the academic year I draw, read on my commute, go to the uni, get back, read on commute, draw a bit, read and go to sleep.
>have realized that art is the only thing that really satisfies me, and that nothing can compare
>still shit at it, though
>usually I cycle between feeling great and depressed, it changes during the day and during the year
>I only feel alive when I'm drawing or painting

[Anonymous No.9882042]

>grew up in an upper middle class neighborhood in nineties Germany
>was bullied as a kid and never made any friends
>became a shutin who played vidya and lurked on the internet all day outside of school
>did a bachelor's degree at the local university, still living in parents' basement
>decided to make an effort and did a masters degree in France
>went well enough and I graduated
>I now have a well-paying job in a city far away from my family and I'm still a shutin outside of work
>every day I force myself out of bed and put on a social nice guy face while secretly loathing my degenerate, sheepish co-worker
>have to hide my personal convictions everyday because I work in a liberal environment and my beliefs are "problematic"

Basically I hate my life. I'm one step away from joining a monastery.

[Anonymous No.9882073]

>>9873893
>single mother, moved to another country for greencard and shekels
>whores around with pedophiles for a couple years, yeah they had their fun
>hated to see the face of her ex in mine, treated me accordingly
>kicked out at 15, so she can start a new life with her new happy family
>brainz permafucked, 30 and living of NEET gibs
>books are unironically my only friends and family
>the only time I feel alive is while in emotionall pain

[Anonymous No.9882080]

>>9882042
Catcher in the Rye

[Anonymous No.9882291]

Sounds like solid excuse for an autofellatio.

Act I
>grew up in the middle class neighborhood in a second world country, enthusiastic little kid, who is told how special he is by everyone who met him
>surrounded by kids sniffing glue, adults drinking themselves to death or injecting shitty heroin replacement, gypsies who'd stab you if you snitch on them doing their business, money exchange mafia types with rottweilers and 600 Mercedes'
>make friends with kids who love to show their dicks and talk about niggers despite lack of niggers in 500km radius
>do cray shit like starting fires (nobody got hurt) or playing with thrown away electronics
>best in class where some chick was begging on the streets after school

Act II
>move to a first world country, become one-pair-of-shoes-a-year-poorfag, live in asylum home for immigrants, make friends, still best in class while learning the language, dad kicks the bucket (surprisingly not overdose)
>being a little shithead instead of helping mom to raise my little sis, get accepted into school for gifted (rich) kids, best friend is Lebanese who hates Jews Plot twist: I am half Jewish
>want to bang that Italian qt who acts like I don't exist, bored with school, start skipping, get bullied for skipping because why the fuck not, skip more
>get suicidal but too dumb to kill myself with a plastic bag, keep it a secret, family is pissed that I am not best in class anymore, change school, skip the fuck out of it
>get institutionalized for skipping school, worst experience in my life sans some bright spots like making one of the "guards" ragequit his job (he was a cunt), also started writing

Act III
>back to school, after reaching the low point this shit is so easy now, become the most popular kid in class, get literally the most popular girl in the school as girlfriend, confused as fuck
>tired of this shit again, back to skipping, want to become a writer but barely write, got a job at a bookstore so I can get some reading done, meet a chick there who knows another chick at a local newstation
>the power of nepotism helps me to a sweet ass job despite not even having a school leaving certificate, obviously get bored after couple months and quit
>try out half a dozen other jobs, almost become suicidal again after stoking shelves in a super market, eventually find something decent, then quit it since I need more time for writing
>it's back to school and gettin' muh certificate, be random quiet guy in year one, best in class again despite not doing shit, have 79% of the chicks asking me out in year two, ego inflates over daily compliments from teachers and kids
>start a new job while waiting for uni, become assistant manager in half a year, everyone loves me, meet some sketchy guy with a great plan, quit job

1/2

[Anonymous No.9882297]

>>9882291
Implying one post is enough, I am not even hard yet. Guess that means two books. P-please don't meme me with the big 3.

Act IV
>start a mostly legal company with the sketchy guy and his friend, make a scary amount of money, obviously spend most of it in on clothes, drugs, Apple stuff and traveling, left the company once accepted to uni
>eventually did enough self-reflection to become less of a shithead as a brother and help my sis to be a bit less of a fuck up than me, spend the rest of the money on gifts to people who weren't too shitty to me, and random donations (mostly rescue services)
>uni fun begins, obviously skipping it sans the first day to get some feels and inspiration, three semesters of living off student loans while writing, sexing and telling mom that she just doesn't get it
>finish second book and pressured/pushed/motivated by FWB to revisit the first to have it ready for agents by 2018
>uni skipping fun is done and now it's avoiding jobs while enjoying life to the fullest, and editing, which is somewhat enjoyable too

Act V
This is where it all goes to shit, right?

2/2

[Anonymous No.9882382]

>>9877852
No recs for me? ;_;

[Anonymous No.9882406]

>>9882382
>born the day after my brothers birthday
>calls me the worst present hes received
That's some comically assholish ASoIaF type of shit, mate.

[Anonymous No.9882427]

>left school without a degree of any sort
>tried working for a bit
>just stopped going
>ended up turbo hikki
>literally living of frozen pizza
>playing vidya all day
>from time to time convincing girls on the net to get nekkid
>started reading again when I got a kindle
>close to 30 now
>done nothing with my life except this

Hardmode: I've already read "Welcome to the NHK"

[Anonymous No.9882512]

>>9877530
Holy kek, you sound a lot like my ex. Though she only spoke 3 languages and her daddy didn't move around that much. Yours isn't a diplomat by any chance?

>>9880164
Wow.

[Anonymous No.9882551]

>>9882406
believe me at least Jaime cares for his brother

[Anonymous No.9882682]

>be me
>leave shitty country at young age
>return to shitty country fir family reasons
>realize how shitty family is because country is shitty
>realize how shitty country is because of a lot of reasons
>get trapped in shityy country for shitty family reasons
>go back to better country
>fight war for better country
>get paid for it
>use money to buy home in better country
>maintain delusional aspirations to retake shitty country and force it to be good.
>contemplate college education.

[Anonymous No.9882692]

>>9882682
Mein Kampf.

[Anonymous No.9882698]

>>9882427
Kek if you stoo getting economic support youre going to be homeless and kill yourslef

[Anonymous No.9882784]

>Is this the life i kicked my mom's belly for.

Mon book: Ballade of the naked ink

By Sweet Iyov aka Mad Fetus Bob aka Big Carrot is Good for your eyes and your soul

[Anonymous No.9882828]

>>9873893
>be pre-school child
>complete fantasist
>talk to plants and objects and stuff
>spook my family out by telling them I died in a car crash and I'm really a ghost, but apart from that pretty chill kid
>go to school and get kind of lightly bullied
>freak out and become huge introvert
>parents move me to another school
>finally get a group of friends, chill group but kind of autistic
>so i develop as kind of an autist edgelord, but it's a private school so I can't go full goth thank god
>be generally melancholic teen, fall in love with multiple girls but never let any of them know about it
>start getting close to a girl in friendgroup
>get on really well, we start talking outside our friendgroup on skype
>realize I should ask her on a date
>lol no
>stop talking to her entirely because I read about Kierkegaard and want to be a knight of faith
>somehow being a knight of faith involves complete celibacy
>nearing the end of high school at this point
>quiet around people I don't know but egregious and confrontational around my friends
>in my final year of school start writing a short story for my final english grade
>starts off simple but quickly I start to become obsessed with it
>start canceling social plans to work on my short story
>it's about a musician who is driven mad
>as a result of obsessing over this as well as other essays I was writing at the time, I start developing health problems
>start getting waves of nausea whenever I'm in classrooms
>start getting waves of nausea whenever I'm in social situations
>stop going to school most of the time
>finally finish my short story, but my health and immune system is absolutely fucked
>have episodes of passing out, temporary blindness and deafness, one of these episodes is the night before my english exam
>coughing up blood the day of the exam
>finish high school
>depressed over summer, no will to really do anything
>go to university to study english, surrounded by passionless people who don't care about the subject
>no social willpower whatsoever, people try to connect with me and I just sperg
>still hanging around with some of my old friends, but make no friends at all on my course
>still bizarrely impelled towards celibacy despite not having any conciously religious beliefs
>want to write but know I can't do what I did with that short story
>I say short story, it ended up pretty long
>anxiety and illness slowly fading, starting to organize my shit, start exercising and socializing like other people
>fear that good health will actually drain my artistic abilities, as a kind of trade-off
Anything about the connection between art and health?

>>9882682
War and Peace my dude, if you haven't already. (If you have, I rec Jesus' Son by Denis Johnson even tho it isn't connect with your post at all)

[Anonymous No.9882886]

>>9873893
>be me
>grew up in a relatively wealthy family
>always felt alienated from my parents and my peers growing up
>never had friends or romantic interests
>in college I dropout because of depression, increasing social anxiety, and boredom
>leave the country without parents' knowledge and go to my ancestral home country
>work for a couple years to pay for education there
>go to med school in this country
>still depressed as hell, no friends, no romantic interests
>figure I might as well spend my life treating poor sick people in the rural areas of this country then my life can mean something
What should I read?

[Anonymous No.9882904]

>>9881836
>Blue Lines on Transparent Skin
This book doesn't appear on Google, is there another name for it?

[Anonymous No.9882994]

>23 yo living in the capital
>like music,movies,music production and martial arts
>had a tough breakup and fell into depression
>got my shit together last year
>had an accident a month ago and almost lost my leg
>had one surgery already and waiting for other too
>looking for at least 6 months at home doing nothing until i can walk again

[Anonymous No.9883016]

>>9880558
i dont like you

[Anonymous No.9883017]

>>9882994
A Farewell to Arms/Jonny got his Gun

[Anonymous No.9883051]

>>9877050
why the third policeman for 9874018? i read it , unless i missed something i dont make the connection to the anon

[Anonymous No.9883057]

>21yold
>second year of college
>studying information management (IT + business adm + information science)
>state college, so its good and free
>eternal conflict between IT and literature
>let me elaborate: i have very little free time, and although I want to ballsdeep programming, I always think I could be reading literature, and I have this problem that it can only be one thing, lit or IT...
>part of the problem is procrastination I guess, because if I planned my time and followed it, I could probably divide programming and reading in a satisfactory way
>this conflict is so big it threw me out of going to the gym for 2 weeks because I keep thinking about it
>a lot of times I ens up doing neither, just thinking about it as my time runs out and another day of conflict, rosy fingered begins

can anyone relate? tips? WATDO

[Anonymous No.9883059]

>>9882886
Anyone? I'm looking for something new to read.

[Anonymous No.9883146]

>>9882886
>>9883059
fuck man, i wish i was with you there..which country you are in right now?

idk what to suggest, maybe walden...?

[Anonymous No.9883159]

>>9883146
Afghanistan
Read Walden before. Thanks for the suggestion though

[Anonymous No.9883168]

>26 year old male
>cripplingly shy
>go through life with no one ever noticing me
>when hanging out with girl friends, watch guys randomly strike up conversation and give them free shit
>when hanging out with guy friends, watch them strike up conversations with girls and give them free shit
>wonder if I never initiated a conversation, would I ever communicate with another human again?

[Anonymous No.9883221]

>grew up in rural shithole china
>had no tap water or electricity, so i never showered and was pretty much riddled with disease
>see random kids dying left and right (getting crushed by trucks, falling into random pit holes, getting left on the roads by parents because they can't afford food etc.); it seemed pretty normal then lol
>living with grandma, was good at school and played with neighbours after school, didn't really have a lot to eat so i was thin as fuck, life was simple but enjoyable
>tv presenter mum (who lived in the city trying to make money for us, visiting once every year or so) caught the eye of some hot shot guy in australia
>they marry and take me with them to australia
>life proceeds to do a 180
>taught myself english by practically living in the local library as i was one of the few asians in my predominantly white school so i had no friends
>slowly integrate into white society i guess
>get into a smart high school filled with rich white kids with lawyers/doctors for parents
>become embarrassed about my past
>commence my self hatred phase
>went to donate one day and find out i was born with hepatits
>still miss granny and haven't seen her for 7 years
>get into medical science at university
>realise how empty and unfulfilling my life in the first world has been and would give anything to go back to my old life
>be diagnosed with a plethora of other diseases (probably because i never learned to care for my body in my younger years)
>with each passing year here, no matter how much i achieve, how much i read, how much 'wealth' i acquire, i long so much for my old simple life with my granny. i don't think my mum loves me, she just tolerates me and i hate living in this household with my step family. idk i plan on moving out as soon as i'm done with my degree. maybe become a shepherd and die before im 30.

[Anonymous No.9883238]

>>9874230
>plebiscite
I don't think you know what that word means

[Anonymous No.9883253]

>grew up on a semi rural area and raised catholic
>always moving to another house and school therefore i never made any real friends
>i started isolating myself from the real world playing video games, around this time i become an atheist
>made some efriends and actually got a gf
>gf leaves me so i get into a huge depression which leads me into even more isolation
>start going on 4chan
>eventually i get better
>i get into politics
>i start going to the gym
>i start reading more books
>return to the one and true catholic faith
>start doing nofap

My life is getting better

[Anonymous No.9883272]

>>9873893
>recently graduated a year early in political science program
>only goal in life was to complete university, maybe go on to an Masters
>feel empty
>get job month after finishing university
>recently quit because of the void and lack of direction after school
>don't want to commit to a cozy full time salary job with minimal professional growth
>now jobless without way to pay bills
>looking for another job

[Anonymous No.9883516]

>Top of my class in high school
>Struggled with my sexuality throughout high school and college
>Still a virgin and only have a few friends
>Spend most of my time putting off reading or doing things, mostly sleeping and browsing 4chan
>Obtained a useless degree
>Plan to go back for a masters of education in the fall to get something out of my BA
>Currently work a dead end job in an insurance company's mail room where I think of suicide all day.
>Job is completely isolating
>I sit in a cubicle for 8 hours a day with very little interaction with my peers
>Might have to quit soon as my hours conflict with my classes

[Anonymous No.9883518]

> born into middle-class family in Syria
> Dad's an English teacher so I grew up bilingual
> go to school, get perfect grades
> hit puberty, no more perfect grades for me
> maintain a group of friends, but only go out on weekends
> spend all my time playing video games/reading
> I start going to an after school thing for talented kids
> teachers there discover that I have a natural talent for writing
> decide to become a writer
> go to a competition but lost because I had no government connections and no money for bribes
> fuckthatshit.JPEG
> instead read a lot, discover Hesse
> daydream about traveling like Goldmond and perusing my personal destiny and whatnot
> 2011 que civil war
> can't leave town war everywhere
> start reading a lot about history
> become atheist at 14, get into a lot of debates, and become well known for it
> school is all boys so no gf
> grades become mediocre as I lose interest
> get into politics
> go to a protest, almost get killed
> neveragain.webm
> highschool
> become leader of atheists at school, gain a lot of friends and reputation
> slide into depression at 17, think about suicide a lot
> start taking medication for depression
> wide-spread corruption allows me to cheat my way out of high school
> go to college so I won't get drafted
> mediocre grades because no motivation
> barely attend, I just go to the exams
> no new friends
> decide to get back to writing
> only had one job, worked in translation for nine months but quit because it's a soul sucking job
> now in my third year, 20 yo virgin

Give something to motivate me anons, already read The Catcher In The Rye

[Anonymous No.9883600]

>>9881106
Thanks, will read asylum.

[Anonymous No.9883622]

>>9883253
>gets on 4chan
>gets better
Pick one
>mfw

[Anonymous No.9883631]

>grew up in a Catholic family
>all the way to highschool I am the best student
>I start to decay and my results get poorer and poorer
>Gets to hang out with really bad people
>Lots of them are muslims (Salafis)
>Slowly but surely I am to convert to Islam and leave everything behind
>My father spots it and prevents me from doing it by putting me to forced work labour
>I work and find a purpose to my life and get to university afterwards
>2 years of hardwork at school, got my life back together and left behind every single bad person
>I get to go to church for the first time in my life
>Religious classes from Traditionalists priests
>First communion
>Get to travel to Russia for a year
>Continue to practice my religion
>Now going for my master degree after getting my bachelor
>Life has never been so wonderful

Thank you God.

[Anonymous No.9883655]

>waiting to die.

[Anonymous No.9883656]

>depressed, haven't left the house in months
>meet amazing girl
>happiest 5 years of my life, pick myself back up
>she gets bored and breaks up with me with no clear explanation
>lose job over crippling depression, 6 months on and no longer leave the house due to depression and anxiety

[Anonymous No.9883678]

>Painter
>No money
>Lives completely isolated
>Only wants to paint, smoke and eat
>Ends up only smoking and eating
>Does not paint a damn thing

[Anonymous No.9883719]

>>9883622
That's a very summarized version of my life, i didnt get better because of 4chan, i got worse, but some other stuff happened that got me better

[Anonymous No.9883809]

>>9873893
>happy, spontaneous, studious kid in primary school
>start of secondary school, be abandoned by friends
>self confidence & esteem collapse, never to return
>after two years get put in a different class, obtain one good friend and get along with others
>at 16, decide I want to be a writer
>at 17, have an "existential crisis" and develop an extreme fear of death
>also around this time, depression kicks in, probably related to fear of death
>at 18, (re)turn to Catholicism, it helps but my faith isn't strong enough to subdue the fear or depression
>graduate high school, decide to study Dutch
>drop out after 3 months
>work in a warehouse for a while
>decide to study philosophy
>drop out after two weeks
>become NEET
>finish first novel manuscript in this time
>decide to study journalism
>get therapy
>also I never approached a girl due to fear of rejection

[Anonymous No.9883812]

> be 20
> be poor
> stopped studying biomedical engineering because *i dont want to waste life on sth that doesn't interest me*
> have loving girlfriends but she's 6/10
> no talents and serious interests
> got into aristotle, stoics and taoism to stop being dissatisfied with my life
> life hurts still
> no idea on what to do with life

[Anonymous No.9883828]

>>9873893
>Moved every two years, never had a "home."
>Parents divorced when I was a teenager.
>Struggled a lot with drugs over the last year but managed to get myself to an okay place.
>Trying to keep my head above water emotionally and doing an okay job.
>Trying to become "myself."
>Not a downer, though. Kinda hopefully optimistic overall.

[Anonymous No.9883863]

>>9873893
This thread is interesting for how people describe their lives. Although obviously the sample is biased, the unifying theme appears to be some sort of disruption of a bright and promising childhood. I wonder whether that's something deep to notice about human development or whether it's just people aggrandizing the average perils of puberty?

[Anonymous No.9883945]

>>9874342
fucking beautiful :)

Read The Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf... if you've already been there, do any Woolf.

[Anonymous No.9884173]

>masochistic as a child, small sexual fling with guy at mutual young age (no penetration)
>attempt suicide in middle school, parents never been the same, i am made aware of the burden I am to my family
>Abusive relationship at age 15 with older girl, essentially a 6 month drug binge
>Been on narcotics since, attempting disintegration from the self
>Go through a phase of self harm as a means of "transcending", both arms, chest and legs scarred deeply and permanently, have not attempted this in many years
>been on loads of meds, stopped taking them (although i need to get back on them)
>Became very strange, considered unstable by everyone i meet, very difficult to make friends when people think you are a maniac on first meeting
>Fortunately still charismatic and not bad looking, not all is lost
>Begin to develop symptoms of psychosis on top of depression
>girlfriend i had at the time revealed she had hated me for upward of a year, was too scared to admit it and waited till she moved away to drop it on me
>Trying as much as possible to evade strong misanthropy
>Attempting to channel messy thoughts through writing and art, difficult with such a disorganized mind
>Currently studying a super dope creative writing course
>Trying my hardest to love everyone is making me feel more and more isolated, losing any and all sense of identity and self
>Still quite young, still feeling optimistic for what the future will bring for creative development
>Trying to work hard, refine my craft and help myself as much as possible before I am beyond help

[Anonymous No.9884296]

>Grew up in a rather wealthy middle class family
>Awkward but still craved attention so people knew me as the weird kid
>Parents divorced when I was 14
>Been in one serious relationship
>Ended around 2 years ago but still not quite over it
>Currently in university
>Still awkward, what few friends I made have said they're dropping out
>Mostly just sit on my ass and play vidya all day
>Constantly think about committing suicide to escape whatever vapid future lays before me

[Anonymous No.9884300]

>>9873921
second on oblomov

[Anonymous No.9884308]

>>9873987
discworld series terry pratchett :D

[Anonymous No.9884808]

>>9882886
Chekhov?

[Anonymous No.9884893]

>>9880164
oedipus rex

[Anonymous No.9884898]

>was born to 20-something party kids
>They split, wind up with super over-protective Grandparents
>Grandoarents never let me do anything or hangout with anyone because it was "too dangerous", grow up NEET mode.
>Daydream about being rockstar like absent amateur musician father strives to be
>End up quitting school and going to online school at 13 to have more time to practice music
>procrastinate so badly that I never do my schoolwork or learn music, just watch porn and obscure movies and tv shows all day.
>Around this time start spending time with party going Mom, who has a boyfriend whom produces two brothers for me
>They get me to start smoking pot with them
>I get my few friends I have smoking it as well, and we all congregate at her house to get high in the daily
>At 16, Grandmother passes away, very traumatizing, spiral into depression for awhile.
>At 17 start working at McDonalds in town my Dad lives, move in with him after he takes over deceased grabdmother's house
>Dads a dick that could care less about my wellbeing, so i end up living off the dollar menu and having one dirty set of clothes I wear every day.
>Finally start making friends with kids my Grandmother would never let me hangout with growing up
>Turns out they're totally as bad as she thought, and quickly get pulled into hoodrat shenanigans, getting drunk, high, doing pills, etc
>Get into first fight, win, turn into cocky little shithead
>Dad starts dealing drugs, and house becomes trap house, move out because of rumblings house is going to get raided, a couple of months before I turn 19
>Wind up with Mom, her boyfriend, and my two little brothers, working at McDonald's in that town now
>Everyone's super off-put by new cocky piss & vinegar attitude. Friends even more so because they feel like I abandoned them to go live with my Dad.
>End up tripping with them, doing LSD/MDMA mixture that wrecks my brain and makes me question my belief in God.
>Spiral into worst depression ever
>Only happiness comes from getting high with Mom & her boyfriend, or getting high with degenerate friends.
>Meet series of girls, fall in love instantly like the virgin former-neet I am, watch them get taken by other guys.
>Get friend zoned hard by one in particular, who has a super messed up home life and begins hanging out with me every day because she can't get positive attention from anywhere else.
>Too dumb to realize the pussy was ripe for the taking, never make a move on her despite her unfaithful nature because I think she's an angel.
>She eventually urges of me, loses her v-card to some kid, and ends up dating abusive 30 year old
>Meet other girl who gives me crash course adolescent experience crammed into one summer, never make a move on her because I'm a pussy despite sleeping in her bed every night.
>Wind up staying with relatives across country for a couple months after getting arrest warrant put out on me until things get cleared up after being stupid

[Anonymous No.9884915]

>>9884898
>Mop around for a year, making shitty friends and failing with girls
>Finally lose virginity to dumb skanky girl who leaves me immediately because I suck in bed
>Shack up with town bicycle for a few weeks until I realize she's banging a million guys behind my back
>Get into car crash while intoxicated, wind up on probation for two years.
>End up moving in with my Dad again.
>Ecentually meet good girl whose about to graduate college.
>Start dating her
>Get her to party with me until parents get pissed and kick her out
>Move Her into my Dad's house
>It sucks, so we get our own place
>She bitches me out and tells me to clean up my act
>I do, and her parents end up actually liking me
>We move for her job after she graduates and end up living in a little apartment, best job i can get is at a Dairy Queen right when I turn 22
>Do that for a year, she ends up buying a house and I tag along
>Finally get goodish job working at a call center making 30k a year
>We are happy

What should I read, my dudes?

[Anonymous No.9885018]

>crippling social anxiety
>smothered upbringing
>never had any friends or social life of any kind
>sparse formal education
>shut-in for over a decade
>no hope
>utterly alone
>not at all interesting
>too weird and autistic to carry on a conversation with anyone
>halfheartedly attempted drawing/writing, but i'm too lazy and undisciplined to get anywhere
>will probably kill myself

[Anonymous No.9885031]

>born into an upper-class family
>everyone holds multiple college degrees
>am somewhat rejected by parents
>troublemaker in school because bored
>get expelled twice in same grade, from different schools
>almost get arrested
>nothing happens from 7th grade to 12th grade
>go to israel for senior trip
>go to community college
>fail miserably that I get suspended
>attempt number 2 while working a job
>fail CC again
>drop out
>go to trade school to learn welding
>graduate this year
>take up a factory job
>love it much more than all of my other jobs I've had.

gimme recs.

[Anonymous No.9885041]

>>9873893
>have love of my life
>it fucks up
>she breaks up with me
>breaks down into an insecure mess, dyes her hair, goes out with someone borderline identical to me
>I still reminisce over my time spent with her, even though shes a massive cunt now to everybody

[Anonymous No.9885747]

95% of the greentexts here mention depression, loneliness etc.
And yet, when you open a dedicated depression thread, everyone is like "go post in /b/, maybe they'll believe you", everyone tells you depression is for high schoolers, there're those friendly comments like "Depressed autists on /lit/ provide me with a narcissistic kind of motivation I can't get anywhere else."
Same when you reply in other threads mentioning you are depressed.

[Anonymous No.9885792]

>it would have been easy for everyone else
>'en jaksa'

[Anonymous No.9885814]

>>9885747
You know, depression threads can ruin communities with masturbatory self pity and wallowing in shame, patting yourself on the back for it all and then...
Heroism or delusion. Desperate reasoning for the situation. Guilt. Spiral.

Making callback threads for sure suffering is not a good thing. It can't be. It's like cutting.

[Anonymous No.9885832]

>>9885031

[Anonymous No.9885884]

>>9873893
>hate my life
>drop out of school, move home with parents
>blame them for my failure in life, refuse to speak to them
>work shitty job I hate, no friends whatsoever
>free time spent reading or thinking about what a failure I am

[Anonymous No.9885931]

>>9883051
>kinda dead

[Anonymous No.9885942]

I wrote a really long text about the story of my life that is much more interesting than any of the other ones here but seeing most replies didn't get any recs I decided to delete it and not post it.

[Anonymous No.9885982]

>>9885942
>wah, what I do might not get attention, why bother
Summed up your story for you.

[Anonymous No.9886037]

>very anxious, perfectionistic person
>always did very well in school
>absolutely lost as to what my purpose is
>convinced that I am fated to be lonely, even though many people have told me I'm attractive and a catch, etc.
>really want a) some kind of purpose and b) a soul mate

[Anonymous No.9886112]

>>9885747
Self-selection bias

[Anonymous No.9886498]

>>9886037
>Broom of the System
Heh, welcome to the water kid.

[Anonymous No.9886502]

>>9884898
>>9884915
Samuel Beckett's Trilogy.

[Anonymous No.9886505]

>>9885884
sons and lovers

[Anonymous No.9886511]

>34
>Single
>INFJ
>Above average IQ but underachieved massively
>No career
>Desperate for love
>Highly sensitive person yet have typical masculine interests
>Part of me is looking for God and inner peace, the other is a hateful monster intent on self-destruction but too timid to take any risks in life or do any of the crazy shit I fantasise about

I've read Steppenwolf btw. Twice.

[Anonymous No.9886963]

>>9885814
There we go again.

[Anonymous No.9887626]

>26
>uni drop out
>live at home
>work in customer service
>no hobbies
>spent the last 10 years gaming but not bored and realised im lonely and depressed

[Anonymous No.9887631]

>>9886511
>34
>No career
You should probably focus on that before finding another book to read
Demien?

[Anonymous No.9887639]

>>9885041
Seems like you got the better hand. Just try and improve yourself for spite of her and your golden.

[Anonymous No.9887777]

>>9883516
no recommendation but I've lived a similar life.

at the moment I'm reading how to create a mind by ray Kurzweil and math because those types of subjects seem to offer a respite for the problem solving mind

[Anonymous No.9888122]

>Am I really a person if I have no people in my life to perceive me as one?
>A girl will never feel affection for me
>I am an academic because I break down in the real world
>I spent school in a cubicle and dont know the name of anyone I went to 6th form or university with
>I love dogs
>All I want to do is play chess and listen to sad indie songs
>I was briefly a male model

[Anonymous No.9888246]

>can't understand people no matter how hard I try
>literally started studying psychology and neuroscience for the purpose of understanding people better
>there are about 10 men whose hearts I ended up breaking because none of them could handle rejection well, though even I can't understand why they were so offended
>My boyfriend is the only thing that keeps me going because he's wonderful and also makes sense
>There is a crazy woman who has been stalking me for the past few months and it's beginning to escalate.
>Life feels like a bad fever dream

[Anonymous No.9888249]

>>9874126
Lol
>I've figured it all out now I'm 21!

You kids are funny.

[Anonymous No.9888268]

>>9883516
May be Tropic of Cancer by Henry Miller? I am russian, but I almost lived the same way like you.

[Anonymous No.9888272]

>>9888246
How old are you?

[Anonymous No.9888284]

>grew up in small town
>date amazing girl in high school
>cheats on me in college
>stop going to class and start drinking/doing drugs
>drop out of college
>move to the city
>work dead end college bookstore job

[Anonymous No.9888293]

>too /a/ for /lit/
>too /lit/ for /a/

[Anonymous No.9888327]

I really wish a big war or a catastrophe would happen. Not out of spite for my fellow humans but out of boredom and because I have this romantic ideal of war in my head.
I need a book that reaffirms my notion of war as the quintessential human condition or makes me question my war romaticism.
Pls /lit/.

[Anonymous No.9888335]

>Be smart kid, get top grades
>study history and philosophy, get a Masters degree from Oxford with the intent to become an academic
>Oopsimdepressednow.jpg
>After uni decide to fix sadness issue rather than try and fail at a PhD
>Travel world for 4 years, work in kitchens with crazy people and ex-cons
>Be consistently much smarter and more middle class than my co-workers
>Live with intense sense of alienation, but grow to accept differences between people more
>Now feel disconnected to posh/intellectual/middle class people as well
>Going through PhD application process now, everyone seems timid and sheltered
>People are shocked I travelled the world on my own and didn't do what most people do.
>Fit in nowhere but learnt to be happy.

I feel like everyone else is living in a nihilistic coma at this point waiting for their life to start.

[Anonymous No.9888362]

>be 20
>kicked out of college for being falsely accused of sexual assault
>become an alcohol
>move in with an old friend
>cuck her baby daddy onto the streets
>de facto adopt her 6m/o daughter
>she gets drunk at a party and is coerced into sucking a guy's dick for 3 seconds
>alcohol worsens
>begin hitting gf
>go to jail after a year
>stop drinking
>try to mend our relationship
>she cheats on me for revenge
>i am contemplating staying with her so that i can fuck her over long-term
>but i still care about her daughter
pls don't recommend "no longer human"

[Anonymous No.9888417]

>be born in working class family in Poland
>dad emigrates to Italy
>at age 5 join him with my mom and brother
>learn how to speak Italian fluently quickly because I had to
>be accepted by everyone but I knew I was different
>also I had the best grades there and spoke the language better than my peers
>have happy childhood in Italy
>go back to Poland
>be even more of an outsider
>can't find my place
>be loner, get into games and films
>read fiction like HP and LOTR and stephen king and lovecraft
>lonely weirdo throughout all my youth, awkward around women
>low self esteem
>get addicted to 4chan and tv-shows and films
>learn to speak English fluently
>have a few friends in high school
>start drinking and doing drugs like psychedelics
>don't read much
>still no gf
>go to UNI for Italian literature
>be the best there even though don't read a single book
>have first kiss fall in love
>could've lost virginity but was too much of an insecure coward
>she gets another bf
>smoke weed all day
>get gf who I don't really like but I didn't care enough to care
>lose my virginity
>spend the next 1-2years fucking her and smoking weed all day every day also abusing her mentally and making her depressed and fucked up
>be mentally challenged, been in a manic-depressive phase since I was 12 or something
>always felt there's something fucked with me and wanted fo kill myself as long as I remember
>mom is bipolar
>parents live in the UK now
>I join them
>I'm a wagecuck in the UK now with no education, no drive and no identity
>be isolated as fuck, get interested in the occult
>have some sort of vision of what I have to do with my life
>it's ridiculous and insane and arrogant
>live inside my own head for months, daydreaming and listening to music
>all my life I've been obsessed with women pretty much
>have one night stand at work and lose job
>unemployed now
>read the satanic bible, the occult, watchmen, fear and loathing, the trial, lord of the flies
>rediscover my love for reading books
>mostly shitpost on 4chan all day long while avoiding getting another job
>mentally broken
>have no clue who I am, what I like, what I want, and if the thing that I dreamed up is something I really want or something I'm supposed to want because of societal pressure
>fight myself in my head everyday
>I wish I knew who I am and what I want or at least die in my sleep
>still think about first kiss girl who wanted to fuck me even though haven't seen her in 1.5year

[Anonymous No.9888464]

>>9888362
no longer human

[Anonymous No.9888483]

>>9888362
Crime and Punishment

[Anonymous No.9888487]

>be me in high school
>good personality and alright looks but still hates himself.
>tfw no gf, have many friends
>meet wonderful lady
>10/10 was literally perfect
>get cross faded one day and fuck up any chance of relationship
>trying killing self
>get sent to psych ward than RTC
>spend a year there.
>good personality was eroded by constant therapy.
>friends mostly moved on after no contact.
>tfw no gf or friends

[Anonymous No.9888504]

>>9888362

The Silent Cry by Kenzaburo Oe

[Anonymous No.9889093]

>18
>Aerospace student
>Living in foreign country, no friends, anxiety
>Spend most of the time playing vidya

I'm too dumb for complicated books.

[Anonymous No.9889186]

>>9885018
American Psycho

[Anonymous No.9889195]

>>9886511
Walden

[Anonymous No.9889200]

>>9887626
Ready Player One, or Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage

[Anonymous No.9889205]

>>9888122
Invisible Monsters by Chuck Palahnuik

[Anonymous No.9889215]

>>9888246
The Millenium Trilogy by Steig Larson

[Anonymous No.9889226]

>>9874126

Cat's Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut

[Anonymous No.9889228]

>>9888284
Killer Inside by Jim Thompson

>>9888293
Haruki Murakami

[Anonymous No.9889234]

>>9888327
Red Storm Rising by Tom Clancy

[Anonymous No.9889244]

>>9888335
Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace, not memeing despite meme status.

[Anonymous No.9889247]

>be 13, 150 iq, fag
>bored by everything, extremely depressed since age 8
>consider suicide
>meet another smart guy, we date
>18 months go by, amazing time, I get to know his friends as well who were like 3-5 years older, mostly smart people as well
>he has to move across the country because his dad's job
>be hyper depressed, less communication with outside world
>get closer with an old friend, he's the smartest person I've ever known by far
>talking with him is such a profound experience, greatest conversations I've ever had
>we're in love
>amazing couple years
>by 16 I have to move across the country because dad's job
>after I move he kills himself (my moving just tipped the scale i think, he was very depressed for a long time and had serious family problems)
>i die inside, don't speak to other humans for almost 2 years, mostly read, work on computer, waste time on vidya and chess, caring for my cat
>made bout 350,000 from trading stocks and bitcoin over the years
>live by myself, 19 years old now
>i've been studying carpentry for a few months and am thinking of buying a plot of land in rural iceland and building a cabin

[Anonymous No.9889263]

>>9888417
A River Runs Through It

[Anonymous No.9889268]

>>9888487
Cut by Patricia McCormick

[Anonymous No.9889274]

>>9889093
>Aerospace Student
>Too dumb for complicated books
Wew, lad Got some fun experiences ahead of you.

The Dark Half by Stephen King

[Anonymous No.9889284]

>>9889247
Gravity's Rainbow by Thomas Pynchon

Post stock tips, how did you take to it like that?

[Anonymous No.9889289]

>>9884296
Perks of Being a Wallflower

[Anonymous No.9889299]

>>9884173
Savage Night by Jim Thompson

[Anonymous No.9889305]

>>9883828
Catcher in the Rye

Or

Frankenstein by Dean Koontz

[Anonymous No.9889313]

>>9883812
The Road by Cormac McCarthy

[Anonymous No.9889323]

>>9883809
>>9883678
Both of you can read Salem's Lot by Stephen King

[Anonymous No.9889332]

>>9883656
>>9883655
Everything's Eventual by Stephen King, the story not the book, though reading the whole book is fine.

[Anonymous No.9889339]

>>9883631
Davinci Code by Dan Brown

>>9883518
Number the Stars

[Anonymous No.9889350]

>>9883272
Infinite Jest

>>9883253
Your Heart Belongs to Me By Dean Koontz

[Anonymous No.9889358]

>>9889284
Well most of my money is from the last few months, I bought up some btc when it dipped this february at like 980 something and sold it recently because bubble fear around 3800.
The stock trading is mostly just instinct and paying attention to earnings report dates. In specific cases, it's not extremely difficult to predict whether a company will report good earnings. Other than that is holding stuff for dividends and paying attention to price to earnings ratios

also i read gr and im not a huge pynchon fan

[Anonymous No.9889372]

>>9874248
Well done, recursive, meta. Nice

[Anonymous No.9889378]

>>9889358
I took to it because I thought it was a good way to turn intelligence into money and i was introduced to it by my first boyfriend who was into trading and econ because his parents had financial sector jobs.
Started with some family money sharing profits and getting a feel for things and eventually had enough to use just my own

[Anonymous No.9889510]

>be me
>s a d b o y s
>get a job
>neet
>drink alone every night
wat do

[Anonymous No.9889614]

>Born in shitty country
>Sick as fuck kid, having seizures almost every day
>Becomes fat fuck kid at 8 years
>Almost didn't see my father till i was 10 years old because he worked in Japan
>Gets bullied because i was weird and fat
>Had no friends
>The only thing i do is painting shit
>Becomes socially anxious
>Goes to japan at 10 years old
>Dont know how to speak japanese
>Gets even more isolated
>Goes back do shitty country even more autistic and fatter
>Still have no friends
>Graduates from high school
>Decides to become a normal person
>Loses 110 pounds
>Starts going out to randomn places
>Forcing social interactions
>Going to parties, talking to randomn people
>Have friends
>Pretends to be a normal guy
>Still socially anxious
>Feels displaced as fuck
>Apathetic, egocentric but at the same time insecure
>The only time i'm happy is when i'm high as fuck or doing really dumb shit
>20 years old virgin

[Anonymous No.9889665]

>The first few years of my life were normal.
>I was an only child, spoiled by my loving parents.
>My mother got breast cancer, and died when I was five.
>My father was devastated by this, and turned to religion.
>It was for this reason religion became a large part of my life.
>At school, I was socially autistic.
>I fought over rubber chickens, would stand on desks when the teachers ignored me, etc.
>The school was fed up and my father was embarrassed, so I changed schools.
>It is now difficult to talk to people.
>I become isolated from others, and because I am still religious, I become a judgmental asshole.
>My father remarried, and was pressured into making a baby.
>Step mother barely spent time at home.
>They get divorced.
>She gets the child, and my father is still paying that bitch.
>Go to high school, become independent.
>Make some friends, develop socially and intellectually.
>Father remarries, he can't handle being alone.
>They have a baby.
>This one is worse
>She is abusive to both me and my dad.
>The smallest things would set her off.
>She is the very definition of what it means to be a clean freak.
>If something appeared to be out of place, she would scream, threaten divorce, throw things, and occasionally hit my father.
>She really started to hate me.
>For the first few years, I would just take it.
>I eventually had enough though.
>If I pissed her off, it was my fault.
>My father would always take her side in the arguments.
>I became an atheist at thirteen
>This would be the beginning of my rebellion, though I was quite a passive person.
>I develop an interest in philosophy, politics, and computers.
>I eventually get in a public high school.
>I don't have many friends, but find myself preoccupied with the better things in life.
>Despite my interest in academics, I don't get good grades.
>I'm lazy, but in every other aspect my life is good.
>I am an Absurdist Atheist, Moral Individualist, Classic Liberal, Cultural Libertarian, and Civic Nationalist.
>I am turning sixteen on the nineteenth of this month.

[Anonymous No.9889982]

>>9889665
>15
wew

[Anonymous No.9890013]

>>9873893
>born into a poor area into a broken family
>raised by aunt, mum was too young, dad was in prison
>bullied terribly growing up, clinical depression since 9
>reasonably intelligent, always told i was going to have the last laugh because i was going to do well in life
>make it my life's mission to have my own kids grow up in a financially stable household with both biological parents
>didn't get into a good university because i was so fucking depressed all the time
>dropped out because i was suicidal
>now 21, no gf, no friends, poorer now than i was when i was born

[Anonymous No.9890030]

>born into middle class family
>good community centered around local Catholic Church
>get in trouble in school for not paying attention and reading books in class because I found the classes to be boring
>get shit grades in high school
> get a shit job at the airport after being a lazy asshole for 2 years after graduation
>after almost 2 years of that, move to bumfuck, Arizona
>after 2 years of that, go back home to get a good job lined up by my dad
>fuck up job within 3 months, possibly because of my social skills, possibly because of company politics
>now working a dead end job at a grocery store
>have loving girlfriend who I tell that we're going to get out of here in a year or two, and not knowing for sure if I'm correct
>brother and his girlfriend beat his kids who are all under the age of 10, they now live with their mom and are partly raised by my side of the family
>haven't seen friends in months
>be depressed
>want to go shooting and ride my motorcycle more often
>buy books to sooth my anger and depression
>constantly listen to podcasts and youtube videos to prevent my thought pattern from going to the conclusion that the universe doesn't give a shit about me, that there might be a civil war, that I probably won't make a mark on history, and that I'll just be a massive failure and disappointment.
>be 25

[Anonymous No.9890733]

>>9885031
>>9890030
Jack London novels

>>9890013
You Shall Know Our Velocity

>>9889247
Wittgenstein’s Mistress

>>9883516
Heart of Darkness
Kafka I guess

>>9883631
>>9883253
A Canticle for Leibowitz is a Catholicism-related book that I thought was both entertaining and inspiring.
Brothers Karamazov both of you have already read I suppose.

>>9883272
Szerb: Journey by Moonlight
Kundera

>>9883168
Houellebecq

>>9883057
Why can it only be one thing? That kind of dichotomy thinking is nearly always misguided. Your mind grows by being occupied with different things.
Reserving 30-60 minutes every day, before going to sleep, for reading is a good idea.
rec: Homo faber

[Anonymous No.9890759]

>>9886037
Storm of Steel

>>9885018
Steppenwolf

>>9883809
Doktor Faustus (Mann)

>>9883678
Hunger

>>9883656
You Shall Know Our Velocity

>>9882994
If you have 6 months, go read Proust.

>>9882904
Sorry, English name is apparently "Almost Transparent Blue".

>>9882886
>figure I might as well spend my life treating poor sick people in the rural areas of this country then my life can mean something
Obviously Céline. Start with The Journey to the End of Night.

[Anonymous No.9890774]

> Be me
> 26
> BS degree in Psychology
> Work in a pharmacy
> Volunteer EMS provider
> Live with parents
> Have a fantastic gf
> Never popular but always maintain 2-3 close friends
> Nature is pr rad

>>9874087
You're already working for minimum wage faggot you've got nothing to lose.

[Anonymous No.9890782]

>>9882828
Houellebecq: Against the World, Against Life. (This is an essay on Lovecraft.)
Büchner’s "Lenz" is a literary account of the writer JMR Lenz’ kind of losing his mind. It’s a really good text.
Mann’s "Doktor Faustus" is a book about a mad musician. Btw post your "short" story.
Weiss’ "Leavetaking" is about some crazy guy trying to become a painter.

>>9882427
Crime and Punishment

[Anonymous No.9890819]

>>9882291
>>9882297
You sure living the life, matey. Would be interested in reading your book, hope you’ll be shilling it here after getting published.
Some ideas for you:
George Saunders’ stories, because you seem kind of wicked too
The Savage Detectives, because it’s about writing, skipping school and working bum jobs
The Melancholy of Resistance, because it actually doesn’t have much to do with you and that might make it interesting

[Anonymous No.9890825]

>Moved to a different city or state every couple years.
>Sister committed suicide when I was 17.
>Rest of family drifted apart and haven't been in contact with them for years.
>Work as a therapist usually for teenagers who act like they don't give a fuck but are dealing with really serious issues.
>Can only maintain friendships/relationships with people who are ok with only hanging out and talking a couple times a month because I don't really get along with people due to mood swings.
>Constantly envious of people who have "more" than me. Drink alone and read books so I can pretend to be a tragic intellectual.

[Anonymous No.9890849]

>>9882073
Book of Job.

If you’re actively looking for emotional pain:
Crime and Punishment
Atomized


>>9882042
Auf den Marmorklippen
Faserland

[Anonymous No.9890868]

>>9890825
Under the Volcano

[Anonymous No.9891353]

>great childhood and family and school grades up till about age 7or 8
>Dad's business goes under, we move to a very poor and dangerous neighborhood
>Not used to being poor and unaware that we are poor, life is miserable because I was spoiled and now I can't have nice things
>High school is a trainwreck and I never gave a fuck about grades but graduated with like 60 average. Had good friends tho, and was accustomed to being poor at that point
>18, college for accounting because it seems easy and I don't want to be poor.
>Parents divorce, siblings can't get their shit together either, life is depressing
>Slowly getting my shit together but no friends or social life because I moved away for college. Good grades, college is a joke.
>Couldn't find a job after college so I transferred credits to university, still doing accounting. Getting worried that life is going to be hard after graduation.
>Meet new friends and start drinking/smoking/chimping out, social skills improve
>Graduate university and fears come to life, no job for 6 months, and then spend the next 2 years hopping between temp agency jobs for shit pay
>Friends and I get into shrooms/LSD and tried a ton of other shit too, best thing that ever happened to me
>Confidence up, social skills up, feel like I understand the world
>Trump election year effected me a lot cuz my friends (didn't know at the time) were Nazis and got me into /pol/
>Confidence soaring, social skills=extrovert, land a good job making good money
>More LSD and shrooms, don't even like smoking anymore
>Family is still struggling

[Anonymous No.9891485]

>>9873893
>Immigrant
>Father died 4 years after we came here because of the blazing Australian Sun when i was in year 6
>got in a elite high school but instead of flourishing I became effectively a social pariah, not bullied but irrelevant
>Still have a ok future with potential but feel inept, lost
>Got called a mediocre cunt which sums it up
>Vain, judgemental, take people for granted while being oblivious to how I am truly perceived
>Being in an immigrant society and feel like I am truly an alien.
>In a conservative Christian immigrant society where i feel like i need to conform to appease my mum who frankly deserves a son that she can be proud in her community
>Not only life style but partner choice seems v limited unless I reject the community Im in.

[Anonymous No.9891514]

>>9891485
V boring stuff but ill go on

>But in the end i like the community

>Hopefull for the future.

>Life goal is the suburban family life. How has it become so difficult to obtain

[Anonymous No.9891646]

>creepy virgin man alienates limerent object through some misunderstanding, never recovers from it
>also an unproductive addict who hasn't contributed a thing to society despite sentiments of superiority.

[Anonymous No.9891747]

>>9873893
>grew up in a kinda abusive household
>totally oblivious to a lot of things, that included
>get grounded for a year in middle school, begin to read books 12 hours a day
>fall out of the habit over time
>become suicidally depressed, attempt twice
>nearly fail out of high school because of depression and poor work habits
>start hanging out in a weeb irc
>through talking, begin to understand myself and my lot in life a bit better
>maybe hiding so you won't get beaten isn't normal
>maybe being suicidal all the time isn't normal
>have a huge falling out with my immediate family
>graduate high school, move in with some relatives
>all feelings of depression and anxiety vanish
>turn 18
>get a job as a manual laborer
>happiest I've been in years
>love for books has been rekindled
>want to become an author
>working on a novel, have a great idea but write awful prose
>seeing my immediate family still ruins my day
>considering moving across the country and cutting off all contact with my immediate family
>pretty conflicted

Would greatly appreciate some recs

[Anonymous No.9891755]

>>9880015
What, except for nothing at all, do the endnotes do to invalidate my shitpost?

[Anonymous No.9891808]

>>9890819
Props for the heavy lifting in the thread, man. I barely keep up reading all the life stories, actually coming up with a good recommendation is admirable.

The last two recs sound great, will definitely check them out soon. Got any specific work of Saunders in mind? So far I am leaning towards Tenth of December: Stories.

[Anonymous No.9892483]

>>9873893
>grew up with neurological disorder requiring medical treatment
>drugs fuck with mental health and exacerbate antisocial tendencies as teenager
>consciously hated the experience of taking many pills every day but too stupid to realize it's actually because they're giving me side effects
>also too stupid to realize i'm depressed and that daily fantasizing about my own death is a bad thing
>life degenerates into stereotypical basement dweller lifestyle in college away from responsibility, eventually contemplate suicide
>choose life over death, find miraculous alternate treatment for medical condition as soon as i start putting a slight amount of effort into reducing the amount of suffering in my life
>get straight As in college as soon as i start applying my intelligence properly; graduated and now no longer require prescription meds for condition
>now /sorting myself out/

Fairly new to /lit/, feel free to give me obvious/essential recs

[Anonymous No.9892544]

> be me
> 23
> divorced parents
> never had any tight friends, and the ones I did had I pushed away
> make my first money at 16, never depend on parents again
> first girlfriend cheated on me with like 15 dudes, never thought I'd get over it, I did
> second girlfriend that actually loved me more than anyone ever will I pushed away cause I wanted to see how it is with other girls
> after highschool don't go to college, move around while working as a freelance designer and illustrator
> invest in bitcoin
> move again
> move again
> move a-fucking-gain and again
> live for years on my own and feel lonely as hell
> depressed since I was a kid, now it's worse
> fuck almost 100 girls from tinder, trying to fill a hole inside, never aproach them girls in real life cause I'm too shy and self conscious
> meet the girl of my dreams, she likes me, but she doesn't see me that way
> get heartbroken
> move away so I don't have to deal with her anymore
> keep thinking about her 2 years later, we sometimes still talk, we sometimes still meet, last time she left me on seen after I tried kissing her again
> wonder aimlessly through life, doing a mix of things that would make me a better man and make me forget her but also things that would impress her I think
> still, I have 0 hobbies
> have money, have wanderlust but never do anything or travel anywhere, and I don't know why

Anyway I like Alan Watts.

[Anonymous No.9892590]

>>9873893
>pampered 20 yo at a nice Dublin uni
>working six week unpaid internship for marketing like it's a coal mine, try and arrive and leave before my high strung asian boss because I'm paranoid she hates me
>write student's essays for fifty to one hundred and fifty euro on the side, depending on how much more pampered than me they seem
>drink and write when I get back home, and read it in the morning, but still feel like I'm making nothing but quack bullshit and cheap romanticism designed to pad the fact that I can't really remember my mother's face, let alone the direct reality of life
>dyslexic and dyspraxic, to the point that I was considered unfit for education
>probably a sex addict, would've fucked an actress from new york if I had a condom last night, ended up with the both of us cumming twice, thought she was jewish but wasn't while I aped at being a writer the entire time
>narcissistic enough to assume every woman I speak to wants to fuck me, horny enough to try it, lucky enough that it works most of the time
>am friendly to any kind of degenerate, but only because I would never want to go back to those virtual summers and hunchbacked depressions
>started going into this nice bookstore with a vermilion facade, just to read for free and return the books within 28 days
>feel strangely listless at the thought of going to sleep sober
>would probably have problems if my parents weren't such good people

[Anonymous No.9892618]

>>9892590
I'm reading The Portrait of an Artist as a Young Man and Confessions by Augustine (commission) alongside the last book of the Alexandria Quartet, which I've become lukewarm about.

>>9892544
Read The Sickness Unto Death by Kierkegaard. Got me through a bad time. Despair and anxiety are constant conditions, but they can be fixed by faith. It doesn't have to be Jesus - it can just be yourself, and that's where I leave it for now - but the reason you don't do anything is because you're not even aware, or really, you don't want to accept, the angst you're feeling.

Whenever I'm sad I think of this quote:

"Anxiety is the dizzying heights of freedom."

What you and the world have a vertigo. But there is no difference between a hundred feet and one, accept for all the ways you think you might fall. Remember the ground beneath your feet and leap when you're ready to leave it.

[Anonymous No.9892628]

>>9892590
Also
>last women I loved (I'm not sure really, if I've ever been in love. Sometimes I think I might just be a light sociopath who feels romantic) became a high-class hooker

[Anonymous No.9892640]

>>9892618

Thanks for the recommandation anon. I am aware though. I think it's what keeps me awake at night when I can't hold it inside anymore and I just start crying til I fall asleep. It's the fact that I'm aware what I'm doing and what's the problem, and that I have the choice to either do something about it or embrace the familiarity of the pain and just keep it inside til the next outburst. For the longest time, I kept pushing it back.
Lately, I'm trying baby steps. Going to the gym, reading more, becoming the best version of me. I'm still not there yet, maybe I'll never be, but it's a start...

[Anonymous No.9892679]

>grew up in the slums (live in Brazil)
>I always spent my time reading
>I was always fighting with other kids in the streets for whatever reasons
>the first book I loved to read was Les Miserables
>somehow I felt connected to that book
>always had a hard time relating to my local friends, since I was a sensitive fag, and they were the typical latin chads
>i avoid people most of the time
>if i could id spend my time improving myself far away from people since they are nocive as fuck
>i regret having friends once i figured out how they will talk shit about you when you are not around
>i never liked my jobs
>i hate university
>i wish i had a gf sometimes

[Anonymous No.9892682]

>>9892640
You are only your actions, and I'm glad to hear that lately they have been good. The dread, of course, is that they are in your control. You are to blame for everything, and if you can carry that weight, you can be praised for whatever you want to do after that point.

It's hard, but it's the way. Just know you are always in control, and that's the damn fucking shame of it.

Good luck. I believe in you.

[Anonymous No.9892729]

>lower-middle class family
>mother is a screeching harpy public functionary, father is an unemployed alcoholic
>he beats her, they divorce
>she hates me for being his son
>gets remarried to an unemployed parasite who depends on her financially
>he beats me, both treat me like shit
>underfed and sleep deprived, feel constantly under siege
>by some miracle of genetic recombination I'm smart, which only further alienates me, but at least I get high grades
>go to top university
>no longer obligated to go to class, I stop caring and start skipping them
>spend my days rotting away in my room bitter at life
books for this feel, lmao?

[Anonymous No.9892831]

>24
Decently school smart but lazy
Dropped out of uni and political science
Finished associates in IT, still studying for a degree in the health field
Just working whatever for money in the meantime
Still love politics/philosophy but have but shallow knowledge of the field at large.

[Anonymous No.9892872]

>dad younger than mother who left her
>both dual raised me (or whatever) for 10ish years then dad took care of me until adult
>talented at writing, physics, maths
>go to uni do well
>make money off of game I play
>get cuckd and fail with women usually
>always feel hurt by lack of friends and people that care about me
>always feel hurt by the way people view me and my personality or interests
>smoke weed, drink and work really hard on my school and stuff to cope

>really into horror, dark fantasy, sci fi, cyberpunk shit

[Anonymous No.9892878]

>>9892872
>>dad younger than mother who left her
uh

[Anonymous No.9892907]

>grow up in the daycare->preschool->public school route
>parents divorce at young age, dads a loser lives in craiglist rooms and moms a failed man
>fail out of highschool, work for 5 years
>have banal friends, gfs, try to be normie but im bad at it
>saved up dosh, moving from portland oregon to norfolk virginia soon for work and lower taxes
>not certain of myself or my decisions but have to do it anyway

[Anonymous No.9892912]

>>9892878
dad was younger than mother and left her. considerably younger even. im guessing you're pointing out the poor phrasing? shouldn't be hard to infer really. also rec something you fucking faggot

[Anonymous No.9892937]

>>9874383
DQ was way more enjoyable for me when I imagined him to be a huge weeb

[Anonymous No.9892987]

>father is soviet immigrant stage actor
>mother is producer/screenwriter/war journalist and blacksheep daughter to rich old money family
>go to fancy private school subsidized by wealthy relatives, travel a lot
>resentful of privilege (like mother)
>constantly dream of championing some cause and endangering myself to have some kind of struggle in my life that isn't women
>dream of doing something valuable
>I am just a lazy bourgeois pseud who talks the talk and will likely never walk the walk
>want to be more than mediocre

[Anonymous No.9893015]

> 18 years old frenchfag
> loving parents, stable family
> litteraly spent my whole life reading, studying, playing piano, and now browsing 4chan
> pretty gud cram school, will become engineer in the upcoming years
> absolutly no friend, no gf
> started for the first time in my whole life to find interest in leaving my flat, I am spending my whole summer holidays going alone from one museum to another
> Everything has always been fine, but since I started to go around, a sensation of wasting my life away with books and maths is slowly getting me. I cried myself to sleep a few time this month, a thing that never occured before.
I think I am unhappy.

[Anonymous No.9893055]

>never went to party in life
>inspired to raise one's own intellect
>went to library at lunch or sat with group of students he didn't know
>all acquaintances pity him
>mythologized because of lack speaking, which ensures that he gets attention when he does spak
>feels awkward just sitting still in one's own body when in presence of others
>difficulty accepting life of recluse
>but know that solitude is his only option because he can't communicate

[Anonymous No.9893139]

>>9893055
Holy shit, that kid is warging into the orangutan.

[Anonymous No.9893174]

>>9892987
posthumous memoir of bras cubas

[Anonymous No.9893240]

>mother dies cancer at 10
>dad tells me "he cant help me" after i flip out at 14 start running away and cutting my wrists
>he lives off moms money (she left a trust fund), hes got no job STILL DOESNT sends me to a group home
>8 months in group home later go to uncles to live
>uncle is "nice" christian man (the kind that groans that he has to go to church on Sundays)
>graduate high school lonely depressed emo who plays wow, somehow go to college
>drop out after a year. Still lonely. Trust fund is mine.
>Drugs, mostly pot/psychs
>still lonely. Depressive. Mood swings but drugs make it ok, maybe.
>get gf move in for a year. Jobless. Realize im just like my dad and seriously contemplate suicide.
>gf breaks up with me, i desperately cling on to her.
>start abusing ketamine, live alone, no job, live off dead moms money.
>just kill me already please
>stop abusing k after a few months moved and went to school and dropped out again
>still no job
>experimenting with a host of psychs.
>find 3meo
>spend past 8 months abusing 3meo
>somehow move in with others. They hate me now because im a delusional paranoid drug user. I dont blame them but i hate being alone.
>i spent an hour today trying to find that baggy of 3meo i hid, i told them i quit and threw away the "rest". I think they took it

Catch-22. I want to be around others but when I am Im miserable. None of them read. I hate television, thats all they do. They smoke pot, i cant because I get really depressed. Hell i cant do any drug without getting depressed. But if im sober I hate him.

When the money runs out ill kill myself

[Anonymous No.9893264]

>move 1500km away and lose all my friends
>virgin and friendless at 23, almost 24
>living alone, doing drugs and drinking every single day still trying to follow a religion
>failing hard and giving up on religion, going harder on drugs
>finally giving up on drugs and living one day after another, alone, with no friends, no gods, no girl, no drugs, nothing at all
>still, feeling fine, but sometimes i feel suicidal

[Anonymous No.9893266]

>>9873893
>ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

[Anonymous No.9893377]

>top athlete/ladies man in high school
>go to top 5 liberal arts university, play football
>become huge psychedelic drug dealer, get very into dmt/shrooms
>cops come in end it. They dont find out too much though, only get suspended for a year
>Take classes at different uni with friends and live with them. Mostly was completely by myself. Meet an old man who completely shatters my consciousness and leads me blindly into grace and mercy.
>meditate 2-3hrs a day and qigong for 30mins, align self with the ocean of God more and more each day. This is brutal process, but the love is incredible. I am on the path, if I wasn't I would be in Mt. Athos or something right now, but this life I have to live amongst society. This is very hard.
>Still need to face darkness with in. I need this to ground myself and create a container. This is also about discipline
>About to go back to orig school for 2 years, no idea what to get major in/do with self in outer world. Basically already completed English degree(Im extremely good at humanities classes) but also have a bunch of maths and year of general chemistry under belt. May also get psych major.
>where does on serve in this world covered in nickelodeon slime? Im not interested in saving this world, it seems like the work is more needed in seed incubation not hospice, but also it seems so fickle. 300 years ago in the desert if ones father was a shoemaker one was a shoemaker, and just loved God- no guidance needed. ugh

[Anonymous No.9893412]

>just floating along in life
>want to do things/start hobbies but too apathetic to actually apply myself
>ride motorbikes / drive cars dangerously on twisty roads at night for thrill factor and an escape
>scraping passes through uni bc relatively intelligent but can't be fucked studying.
>couch potato, constantly watching anime/movies, reading, browsing 4chan.
>slightly socially inept

[Anonymous No.9893417]

>>9888335go on one of those free 10day vipassana retreats. seriously

[Anonymous No.9893486]

>born in a small town
>parents divorce at a young age
>mom moves us to the city
>dad starts dating mistress openly, introduces bro and I to her
>too many change too fast
>get depression
>put on meds
>get bullied until high school
>join marching band
>get a little respect and grow more confidence
>fail high school
>get diploma at continuation school
>join Marines
>get this newfound confidence and pride
>never felt better
>travel throughout asia
>finish enlistment
>come home
>work security while figuring out what to do for college
>apply at community college to build up GPA and transfer to somewhere better
>come home and browse 4chan

[Anonymous No.9893497]

>>9893486
i feel happy for you, man