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/lit/ - Literature

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9318060 No.9318060 [Reply] [Original]

Attention /lit/izens, bow to your king!

There is a reason it is called "the Book"

Poetry, history, philosophy, and theology all perfectly blended into a single edition and given the rightful stamp of "Holy". Lolita cannot stand in it's shadow, Aesop's Fables are not worthy of being it's footstool. Bow to the king of books you ignorant and unwise, Bow with all your might!

What other book contains all of history within it's pages? What other book more accurately summarizes the human condition and the solution? What book is there that can be upheld for centuries, in the face of persecution and censorship?

No one will remember the other novels written by mere mortals, but the Bible shall live forever with the words therein.

>> No.9318134
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9318134

>>9318060
The Bible is just a voice in the wilderness, preparing the way for the Lord of all Books

>> No.9318141

>>9318134
I stand on a stack of Gravity's Rainbows while preparing my banana pancakes.

>> No.9318162

I'm not even religious and I think it's the best book ever written, maybe even with an ironic amen brother!

>> No.9318207
File: 98 KB, 420x430, Bk_Mormon_Heirloom.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9318207

>>9318060
Just a prequel to the real holy book

>> No.9318218

>>9318060
>No one will remember the other novels written by mere mortals
The Holy Bible was written by mortals, you uncultured pseudo-believer.

>> No.9318223

>>9318060
>Bow with all your might!
Why does the Lord want me to bump my forehead to the floor?

>> No.9318231

>>9318207
Is this /lit/ approved? Is it well written?

>> No.9318270

>>9318223
So one of His servants can fuck you up the ass.

>> No.9318454

I agree. This book is the most printed, most popular, most read book in the world and there's a reason for that.

>> No.9319567

>>9318454
Fifty Shades of Grey is the most sold book series on the planet. Harry Potter is second.

Guess there's a reason for that too.

>> No.9319579

>>9318231

i only worked through parts of nephi and it wasnt that good desu.

>> No.9319585

>>9318060
Christian faggot.

This is such bait.

>> No.9319661

>>9318231
No, it's shit.
Everything by that fuck is shit.

Joseph smith is the definition of a brainlet.

>> No.9319671

>>9319567
Let me know whenever a group of people similar to the Gideons place shitty fifty shades of shit everywhere.

>Implying God cares about sales, and not salvation

>> No.9319680

>>9319671
>implying religion has anything to do with literature whatsoever
We're talking about stories, nerd, not "salvation". Come back when you're ready to talk about the human condition.

>> No.9319718

>>9318060
biblia actually means little books, you pleb

>> No.9320401

>>9319585
Oh God shut the fuck up.

>> No.9321383

>>9318218
>not knowing that because of Jesus these men will live forever

>> No.9321388

>>9319680
>human condition
No such thing exists.

>> No.9321860

>>9318231
I'm about halfway through it. The story is pretty simplistic and wrapped in KJV-style English and with a bunch of sermons thrown in. I'm liking it because I'm fascinated by mormonism, but most readers would be bored stiff. Mark Twain called it chloroform in print.

Some parts are pretty funny though, at one point one of the "authors" says 'I will now read from Isaiah' and the next dozen chapters are a chunk of Isaiah.

An interesting thing is that it's more trinitarian than the Bible. It's repeatedly stated that Jesus is literally God, yet mormons aren't trinitarian!

>> No.9321864

>>9318060
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/1598104