That God Damned /lit/ Magazine

[Anonymous No.8812004]

Hey guys, Pinecone here. We're about to release patch 1.27.4 for your magazine. Taking suggestions & submissions. These are the current patch notes:

>added discernable talent
>removed rape from Catcher in the Rye
>fixed unconjugation glitch
>added more Bill Murray
>added seeds for next Great American Novels
>fixed 'irony' glitch
>upped novel inspiration rate

Submissions:

pineconemagazine.com

[e-mail]

[Anonymous No.8812017]

>>8812004
I want to see an anti-woman section

I'll make weekly contributions if so

[Anonymous No.8812047]

>>8812017
Make it so.

[Anonymous No.8812060]

>>8812047
I have a 600 page manifesto. They neatly divided into chapters, they can be published separately really.
I also have some excellent pieces on Pepe and Lord Kek and the mythology that surrounds them.

Will edit them and pass them through to you

[Anonymous No.8812101]

>>8812060
please do, i eagerly anticipate your paper

[Anonymous No.8812188]

>>8812060
I was under the impression that Pepe was a manifestation of Kek. Anyway, just keep it under 300 words.

[Anonymous No.8812219]

What happened to the other one from earlier in the week? Haven't seen a thread about it since then
Also I have a short story I might submit after I edit it

[Anonymous No.8812239]

These are cool. I really like the /lit/ threads repackaged as intervews, but if any of us want to be able to say "i've been published" it's gotta be a bit less autistic

might submit a short story or something soon.

[Anonymous No.8812254]

>>8812004
Did you seriously use the magazine to reply to a fucking post?
The autism is high.
It's probably ths truest to /lit/ attempt at a litmag yet

[Anonymous No.8812301]

>>8812219
>>What happened to the other one from earlier in the week?
No one has heard from them & their website is kill

>>I might submit after I edit it
Don't delay—if it's good, it's going to get edited anyway

[Anonymous No.8812345]

I want to submit but I'm scared

[Anonymous No.8812414]

How long would you prefer a submission to be?

[Anonymous No.8812425]

>>8812004

I never heard of this, this is pretty legit I think. Would be funny if Thomas Pynchon was actually behind this.

[Anonymous No.8812495]

>>8812239
>>might submit a short story or something soon
Maybe a blueberry-girl poem...?

[Anonymous No.8812783]

"Kyle MacLachlan"

[Anonymous No.8813090]

I don't think my story is right for this publication, should they be Pynchonian and post modernist?

[Anonymous No.8813212]

This better get me laid m8

[Anonymous No.8813230]

>>8812004
>>8812301
Is this notalkingplz or are you just posting his work

[Anonymous No.8813313]

>>8812254
It's more /lit/ than TAR. They cheated & used Duotrope for non-/lit/ entries, the bastards...

[Anonymous No.8813333]

I like the idea in practice, but in theory it seems kind of like going backwards. We all have all the information we want at all times, why do we need someone to compile the good stuff in pdf form of all things?

I mean noboby picks things up and reads them anymore if they can't help it, it just seems like worship of an old dead idea or something

[Anonymous No.8813338]

what do you mean THAT goddamn lit magazine? There's been like 4 of them starting up in the last 2 weeks.

[Anonymous No.8813497]

>>8813338
This is the only GOOD & QUALITY one.

Every other one (besides TAR) was used by the editors to 'publish' their own work. This one is just for /lit/.

[Anonymous No.8813728]

Will you guys accept a "serious" (and perhaps seriously bad) poem, or is this just for joke shit?

[Anonymous No.8813903]

>>8812004
Nigger I'm not reading this force-justified eyerape.
Learn to LaTeX and try again.

[Anonymous No.8813936]

>>8813903
>>LaTeX
AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA

[Anonymous No.8813955]

I can contribute a chapter from my dissertation on social media and intersectionality

[Anonymous No.8814070]

>>8812414
>>how long
3 pages or less.

[Anonymous No.8814086]

>>8812004
What are we NOT allowed to write about?

[Anonymous No.8814107]

>>8813903
Seconded. This justification is pure shit.

>>8813936
Design a better justification algorithm than LaTeX. Can't? HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

[Anonymous No.8814122]

>>8814107
If LaTeX was any good, they would have kept their justification alg from '99. Spend more time working—less time talking. Learn GD dummy

I'm 100% serious, I haven't laughed myself to tears in over 2 years—thank you LaTeX lads!!

[Anonymous No.8814131]

>>8814086
This

[Anonymous No.8814187]

>>8813936
>>8814122

[Anonymous No.8814199]

I want to submit something but don't know what to write.

What does the magazine need? What do you want to see?

[Anonymous No.8814201]

>>8814187
I appreciate the sour grape post!!

Make /lit/ great again!!

[Anonymous No.8814206]

>>8814199
I'm betting the hard workers at pine cone would like to see some fucking talent. If you can't supply any psuedo-profound bullshit short stories don't even bother submitting.

[Anonymous No.8814210]

>>8814206
What did he mean by this?

[Anonymous No.8814215]

Until when will you accept submissions? I've got a two-page fourth-draft of something, but I'd like to have it be proofread by someone who proofreads all my shit, which can't happen until tomorrow. Is the deadline today? Tomorrow? Next week? Never? Do the chances of being included decrease the closer we get to the deadline?-

[Anonymous No.8814245]

>>8814086
>>8814131
Y'all can write about whatever. As long as it shows yr talent.

[Anonymous No.8814353]

>>8813090
Nooooope. S'long as it's good.

[Anonymous No.8814532]

Just submitted something.

How long does it usually take for these to get done?

[Anonymous No.8814600]

>>8814210
http://journal.sjdm.org/15/15923a/jdm15923a.pdf

[Anonymous No.8814606]

>>8812004
If you accept our submission will we get an email? what about rejection?

[Anonymous No.8815172]

>>8813728
See
>>8814353

[Anonymous No.8815177]

This is a new low for /lit/

[Anonymous No.8815182]

>>8812783
this, idiots

[Anonymous No.8816143]

>>8812783
THIS

[Anonymous No.8816186]

hey pinecone

[Anonymous No.8816205]

>/lit/ "magazine"
>all "content" is taken from warousu archives and packaged in oversized pdfs

[Anonymous No.8816247]

>>8812219
We're currently reading whatever people have sent us.

The email is [e-mail].

[Anonymous No.8816253]

>>8812301
>No one has heard from them & their website is kill
Not true and very rude!

[Anonymous No.8816378]

>>8812783
Honestly this.

[Anonymous No.8817887]

>>8816247
>>8816253
Well this is awkward. First off, this person is not from Unpublished. Secondly, our email is "[e-mail]."

I am literally confused as to why this is happening. As a zine publisher I think we should work together. Hence why we are reaching out to Pinecone.

[Sumbission No.8818086]

I saw her eyes sparkle
Golden blue diamonds,
Her lips moved like
White-silver rubies;
Then her mouth sounded
The following words:

'I love you—...as a friend.'

My heart shrank like
Purple jewels in the sea,
My eyelids sank like
Dark treasures in the ocean,
My head did storm the silence
With the following thoughts:

'I did love her— and she not me,
Is this inevitability?'

And then my mouth opened,
And it said, 'But I love you.'
And she said, 'I know.'

[Anonymous No.8818241]

>>8818086
2/10

[Anonymous No.8818269]

>>8818241

—————————
"When years past
Th' ears pass,
Stories are heard,
Sadness and mirth."
—Teller
—————————
+4 (y) <3 2:-)
—————————

John: I love it! +2
Teller: Thank you
[John, 2016:12f4b]!
Mary: Wonderful! Is
it really yours? +1
Teller: Really mine!
Send kisses to your
kids, [Mary, 2016:1
43b00]!
—————————

[Anonymous No.8818358]

>>8818269
1/10

[Anonymous No.8818446]

Why do you have to download? Just post it. You can post pdfs on /tg/.

[Anonymous No.8818859]

>>8818446
8/10