[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/lit/ - Literature

View post   
File: 815 KB, 766x758, 1277975118583.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
875281 No.875281 [Reply] [Original]

You have ten seconds to be as pretentious as possible.

>> No.875289

Well back in Albany...

>> No.875286

I study in a community college and i'm SO much smarter than my teachers. I think my style is pretty Joycean, though.

>> No.875290

I like Atlas Shrugged, it was deep and riveting

>> No.875292

>>875286
>mentions Joyce
10,000 points

>> No.875299

That book is NOT literature. It's consumer trash, read a real book like...

>> No.875305

That's such a non sequitur argument.

>> No.875306

>>875299
1800 points

>> No.875307

Today I was sitting in starbucks, drinking my chai tea latte and reading Dostoevsky on my iPad, some fuck decided to spill their coffee all over my vintage vans. Shit was not cash.

>> No.875310

>>875307
>, and some fuck

>> No.875314

DRM is evil and people who push it want to destroy our culture.

>> No.875323

>>875307
222 points

>> No.875325

>>875281
I don't have to do anything for you.

>> No.875327

I am the OP of a thread about being pretentious.

>> No.875329

>>875325
1000 points

>> No.875333

I took AP classes in high school.
I am obviously more intelligent than you'll ever be.

>> No.875335

I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

>> No.875339

>>875335
That actually sounds quite nice.

>> No.875338

What do you mean I need to learn the ways of a wise man? I minored in philosophy.

>> No.875344

>>875339
1,000,000 points

>> No.875349

>>875281
Wow I love how primitive people can be, you think taking classes and learning useless information makes you intelligent

>> No.875350

>>875344

Thanks. I'm new to /lit/ and am already interested thanks to this thread.

>> No.875351

my boyfriend whose a lawyer...

>> No.875358

>>875351
I laughed.

>> No.875363

riverrun

>> No.875367

>>875344
Success!

>> No.875371

People are idiots who dont understand the greats. Shakespeare is actually quite overrated. Read Dostoevsky, although even he is has no credibility because he turned christian. Sometimes I wish I could have talked some sense into these great thinkers. Well I got to install linux on my blackberry (ipods are consumerist shit) so I can get my arnold scheonburg collection onto it before I pick up my partner from MIT (I call her my partner because "girlfriend" is condescending in our male dominated society). If only vinyls werent so damn big. Shit is hard to fit even in first class. Although I cant wait to get to Paris and Rossini in their new Opera house, and I heard joel robuchon is opening a new resteraunt. He is overrated though, personally I prefer Ducasse, although no one makes better Pheasant Au Gratin than Rubichon.

Did I win?

>> No.875374

>>875367
Thanks again. God, I'm so good.

>> No.875377

>>875371
tl;dr.... 50,000 points

>> No.875380

>>875371

Well, you certainly put a lot of thought into this. Someone you know?

>> No.875376

The pop-art (yet neo-minimalist) etchings of Ziggy and Family Circus, both liegemen to the Lichtensteinian legacy, question their own raison d'etre. Are they visual tropes? Are they self-conscious (self-mocking/self-loathing) po-mo nombrilisme? Or are they simply (and solely) stochastic snapshots sans lexical basis? The Family Circus series can best be examined as artistic interventions against the oppressive humor archetype, whereas the unappealingly desperate musings of Cathy Guisewite's eponymous series are truly indebted to Jenny Holzer’s oeuvre. Or, as Baudrillard and Guillaume so succinctly state, “What is produced with the romantic turn…is…the…play of…masculine hysteria…of …sexual paradigms that once again must be reinserted in the more general and universal context of a change in the paradigms of otherness.

>> No.875382

>>875371
>>875376
>You have ten seconds to be as pretentious as possible.

>> No.875384

>>875382
997 points

>> No.875385

>>875382
200,000 points

>> No.875387

>>875382
I think in the spirit of the thread, the correct reply is that I wrote it in 10 seconds. Everyone should be able to write that in 10 seconds. I guess not everyone can be educated at cambridge or MIT

>> No.875388

>>875382
>>875382
>>875382
>>875382
>>875382

Ten seconds: copypasta.

>> No.875394

>>875388

Isn't it hard to copy and paste in or under 10 seconds on an iPhone?

>> No.875399

>>875394
320,000 points

>> No.875402

I read so-and-so's translation of Les Mis, and it was just awful. Sentence structure was incoherent and pedantic compared to the original French.

>> No.875404

>>875387

This is true, and I respect your work as a real writer, like myself.

>> No.875424

Vampire Weekend has to be the greatest rock band since Coldplay.

>> No.875427
File: 33 KB, 335x500, 1277700525773.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
875427

>>875424
-12,000 points

>> No.875431

>>875424

>rock band
3,050 points

>> No.875440

>>875339
probably the winner of the thread

>> No.875443

Yeah, no, but I'm going to have to say Einstein was my favorite scientist.

>> No.875457

anyone who insults palahniuk simply cannot comprehend the level of depth that he can convey under a mask of so-called "gore"

just ask them what fight club really meant and you'll see how dumb they are. as usual I have to explain to them what he REALLY meant.

>> No.875459

David Foster Wallace

>> No.875467

per se

>> No.875469

But how you know Dumbledore is gay for sure?

>> No.875477

Pretentiousness is for plebes. I choose a higher standard.

>> No.875478

It's actually pronounced al-BAIR ka-MOO

>> No.875487

not much, just chilling, listenin to neutral milk hotel's really old stuff and reading house of leaves.

>> No.875579

Post-avant jazzcore is better than progressive dreamfunk.

>> No.875589

>>875579
Is it wrong that i read that post and then immediately thought "wait, i bet those would sound awesome"?

>> No.875590
File: 45 KB, 650x500, 1277422768490.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
875590

>>875459

>> No.875598

I don't even need to try to be pretentious. Everyone around me is such an imbecile, it's not even funny. I merely have to put on the lightest facade of intellectualism and I come off as pretentious. Simpletons and absolute illiterates who can't even enjoy a good novel once and a while.

>> No.875602

>>875579

Ephel Duath?

>> No.875604

This thread differs in no way from any other /lit/ thread, it isn't especially pretentious at all, just standard /lit/ material. You should all be ashamed for bringing this board down.

"be the change you want to see in the world"

-- Ghandi

>> No.875605

>>875604

Very subtle, nicely done.

>> No.875606

Valentin Louis Georges Eugène Marcel Proust.

>> No.875609

>>875604
10/10, would lol again

>> No.875621

I have an Computer Science degree, which is a much harder curriculum than your English degree, and is therefore worth more. I can write essays, but you can't write algorithms. I hope you have fun flipping burgers.

>> No.875623

>>875621
>an Computer Science degree
GOD DAMNIT, the one time I forget to proofread.

>> No.875625

>>875621
I'm majoring in philosophy, you can enjoy your imbecilic, plebian lives with your fellow Philistines.

>> No.875635

>>875625
The only thing imbecilic about my life is that I must constantly deal with the lofty aspirations of unskilled peons such as yourself.

>> No.875634

only retards waste their time with literature. true intellectuals study and perform science.

>> No.875638

We don't need libraries, we have the Internet.

>> No.875642

>>875635
Unskilled? There is nothing more unproductive than computer science you illiterate swine, philosophy is the basis on which our society is built. I am contributing to the future, you are doing little more than organising databases for the hideous corporations holding it down.

>> No.875647

Hi, I'm a tripfag.

>> No.875649

Deathly Hallows? I can write fan-fiction better than that.

>> No.875650

>>875647
1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000&#4
4;000 points

>> No.875651

>>875621
>an Computer Science degree
You illiterate twit. Did no one teach you the basics of our great language? Did no one hammer the difference between "a" and "an" into your peon brain? You make me sick, your presence on this web page is tainting my Mac book. Delete your post for the sake of the rest of us.

>> No.875654

>>875642
And I suppose with your "basis of society" you could build a house? Perhaps you could pump water out of a well by virtue of Kantian ethics? It is Engineers who have built this world, the philosophers are merely there to provide color commentary.

>> No.875662

You guys should reccomend me some books. Intresting plot, memorable charcters, unique prose, and im in literary heaven.

>Not that any of you conservative, european masochists could ever hope to spend an ounce of your precious 5 second internet attention spanse on me.

>> No.875667

>>875654
There is so much wrong with your statement I can't even begin to comprehend where life failed you.
>color
This, however, does explain a lot of it. Typical American pig, your filth never realises the importance of the upper-tier thought processes. You instead focus yourselves on petty labour, rather than begin to think of the ramifications of any of your actions. This is why the world despises you.

>> No.875685

>>875667
I believe I detect a bitter note in this retort. It seems to me that if Britain had anything worth contributing to the world, they would have retained their spot as the world's superpower. It's apparent by your use of "a lot" that British English is now subservient to American English. You're just embarrassed that we've done everything you wanted to do more boldly and more successfully.

>> No.875709

This thing got even more pretentious when you guys got serious about it.

But hey, it's /lit/.

>> No.875713

>>875667
I will take your silence as an admission of defeat.

>>875709
Oh, we're not being serious. Or at least I'm not being serious. Mostly. :/

>> No.876316

>>875709

I also wonder who's being serious and who's not. I think the angrier they get, the more serious they are, thus the more pretentious they are.

>> No.876384

lit is just a bunch of overprivileged white kids, the proletariat will inherit the earth.

>> No.876552

>>876384
Who gave you permission to stop working? Back to the fields, peasant.

>> No.876559

I do not like the Harry Potter series

>> No.876562

If you can't read Ulysses without footnotes then you should just give up on reading and take a job flipping burgers you illiterate trailer trash.

>> No.876563

Kafka is emo shit.

>> No.876569

Balzac? Nah, I'm not really into Pokémon.

>> No.876571
File: 72 KB, 660x596, 1271087279464.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
876571

>> No.876573

>>876571
That guy is my hero.

>> No.878215

>>875579
I disagree

>> No.878217

Joyce? i don`t read fanfiction

>> No.878223

I genuinely love Neutral Milk Hotel.

I know, I'm actually not that pretentious,

>> No.878225

>>878217
nice

>> No.878229

This word doesn't mean what it used to mean.

Ah well. Living language and all that.

>> No.878232
File: 23 KB, 176x172, Feels Bad Man.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
878232

>>876571
I wish my apartment smelled of sweet mahogany.

>> No.878241

i refuse to read anything by an author who insists upon using train of thought styles of prose. I maintain that if their fingers can keep pace with their thoughts, clearly there is nothing of merit to be gleaned from their work.


I think i actually convinced myself of that while I was typing.

>> No.878259

Gentoo is the only operating system on my pc for over 2 years

>> No.878269

>>878229
I'm starting to view English as a language we must keep comatose or otherwise artificially "dead". Latin's use in the scientific world is because it is a dead language, and so will not change. since english has become athe lingua franca for almost all international communities, and the de facto international language, we can no longer allow it to change as a living language should; doing so would result in a native english and an international english. completely fucking up any merits to be had from having english as an international language.

>> No.878278

i came from the /mu/ board to see this pretentious thread. you guys are doing alright at this.

>> No.878279

Yea, I like the author, but, y'know, the book you're reading by him is terrible. Just sayin'.

>> No.878346
File: 14 KB, 310x388, goya03.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
878346

O, woe is us.
Literature is a dead art-form just like the pre-"modern" painting. Where are the broad, layered strokes that hide transcendental truths behind scenes most (un)real?
But, alas, that is the price we pay for enduring the nihilistic phase we wrongly label "post"-modernism.

>> No.878365

>>878346
>implying you know what modern means
>implying you know what post-modern means
>implying post-modernism is nihilistic
Where did you go to university? Some crap state-run school? Some glorified high-school without real professors?

>> No.878409
File: 22 KB, 236x240, 3736143336_414de05fef_m.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
878409

>>878365
>You have ten seconds to be as pretentious as possible.
This thread.