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/lit/ - Literature

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858008 No.858008 [Reply] [Original]

It was my birthday 2 days ago.

>ask for books
>family gets me the Twilight series, some Charlaine Harris vampire romances, and some weird christian book about being a "woman of virtue"

>my face

>> No.858010

Your real problem is that you are trash descended from southern hicks.

>> No.858014

I assume you are a girl. Does this kind of thing happen often to those of your kind?

>> No.858017

I don't get it. Are you serious? Is this a troll attempt? Is that face sarcastic, or really happy?

>> No.858018

>>858014
yes and yes

>> No.858020

>>858008
this is probably a troll but seriously have a list to choose from
who just says 'books'?

>> No.858021

>>858014
oh god yes

>> No.858022

LOL. Get a job and buy your own damn books.
...or download them.

>> No.858024

And it's kind of sad that that's what your family thinks you're into. Mustn't know you very well.

>> No.858026

>>858020
What an aspie. You shouldn't tell people exactly what you want for your birthday.

>> No.858030

Simply tell them you aren't into that kind of thing.

>> No.858031

>>858008

ARE YOU HOT OP!!??

WE SHOULD GO OUT! ARE YOU FAT!? LET'S MAKE OUT BECAUSE YOU ARE A GIRL!!!!

>> No.858032

>>858024
she probably loves Twilight. most bitches do even if they won't admit it.

>> No.858035

women do not understand or produce great literature. your family has the right idea; accustom yourself to your designated lot in life.

>> No.858036

girls all have smelly buttholes

>> No.858037

This is why you link people to your Amazon wishlist.

>> No.858038

Why do I imagine a lot of women into reading suffer similar poor recommendations

personally I get this
>birthday coming up
>asked what I want
>oh I don't mind
>you're smart you'd like a book (not a bad judgement)
>you're also LOL SO RANDUM
>get a bunch of books of 'random, cwazy trivia you won't believe is real like 'why don't penguins feet freeze?' or 'can cows walk down stairs?'
>receive these every year and already have memorized all the pointless facts in the world

>> No.858039

>>858026
lolwhat
my birthday, i ask for what i want

>> No.858042

>>858026

Uh, what? I always get people to tell me specific items to get them. Why the FUCK would you just ask for something as general as "books"?

>> No.858044

>>858036
I haven't bathed today and I just stuck my fingers in my panties. I can't decide which is worse, my butthole or my pussy. Whew, what a mess.

>> No.858047

>>858042
I get where she is coming from. I like to be surprised and for people to put thought into their gifts.

>> No.858048

>>858044
And I'm hard. Thanks. I was going to make a serious post but now I have to go fap. Oh well.

>> No.858049

it was my birthday four days ago, and I got jack shit. I didn't even get a "happy birthday" from my friends. Go fuck yourself

>> No.858051

>>858044

....

More please.

Seriously. More.

>> No.858052

My brother once bought me The Blank Slate for my 18th birthday, sucks to be you OP.

>> No.858053

if you can't put effort into telling me what you want, i'm not going to put effort into getting you anything

i always get something thoughtful+creative for someone as an extra, but if they can't just cut the bullshit and tell me that they want something specificallt, they can deal with whatever shit i get them

>> No.858061

there's no need to be rude guys. i'm not trying to complain about what they got me. i just thought it was funny that this is the kind of shit they thought i would like

>> No.858065

>>858038
haha i got 'why don't penguins feet freeze' for christmas

>> No.858067

>>858008
POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

POST TITS OR GTFO

>> No.858069

one of my friends bought me a book called "porn for women"
i feel your pain, OP!

>> No.858071

>>858026
not in general no, but if someone has asked what you want and what you want is books, you probably don't want just anything between two covers.

>> No.858074

>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067
>>858067

>> No.858081

/b/tard here, tits please.

>> No.858083

>>858051
My boyfriend and I have sex very frequently. We were both tested for STDs before we began having sex. I went on the pill about two months ago and my second time having my period while on it, there is a rotten smell (Like something dead and rotting) coming from my vagina once it was finished.

>> No.858091

>>858083
it's a dead baby, love.

>> No.858094

>>858083
The pill made you miscarry the baby you already had forming inside you. You need to pass it as soon as you can, or risk necrosis.

>> No.858100

>>858083

Pro tip: Never tell stories about having sex with a man. It turns people off.

Also, you should go to a doctor because that is not normal.

Also, I think a girl's ass smells pretty cool.

>> No.858110

>>858083
Is your boyfriend hung?

>> No.858113

>tell my friends I want books for my birthday
>get The Dresden Files
>everythingwentbetterthanexpected.jpg

>> No.858114

>>858100

>Pro tip: Never tell stories about having sex with a man. It turns people off.


Speak for yourself

>> No.858120

>>858110
his penis is pretty big. it's 7 inches long and it's very thick.

>> No.858122

>>858120
Do you enjoy anal?

>> No.858123

>>858120

Continue

>> No.858128

>>858120
That's about the size of my boyfriend's too. The real issue though is if you are very petite or not.

>> No.858129

only a fat girl would continue like op is doing

or even start for that matter

>> No.858131
File: 126 KB, 750x563, 1267890403954.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
858131

God damn it.

This is not /b/ you fucking lonely fucks.

>> No.858132

>>858122
saving it for my husband guvnor

>> No.858138

>>858132
>saving anal virginity for husband
Logically speaking, shouldn't it be the other way around?

>> No.858140

here she comes, you'd better watch your step, she's going to break your heart in two, it's true. it's not hard to realize, just look into her false colored eyes. she'll build you up just to put you down, what a clown. cuz everybody knows (she's a femme fatale) the things she does to please (she's a femme fatale) she's just a little tease. see the way she walks, hear the way she talks.

>> No.858141

>>858123
whadda you want to know?

>> No.858154

little tease of a slut. how fat are you?

>> No.858178

go to used book store...
sell crappy books...
buy new books with the money...
???
Profit!

>> No.858221

>women says "i want books"
>gets books but not the "right" ones, obviously because she didn't speficy what she wanted
>"hurr durr i never get what i want, i always gets stupid shit"

>man says "i'd love moby dick, maybe lolita,..."
>man gets what he wants
>"Oh cool, i totally got what i wanted"

the problem is you girl

>> No.858226

>>858008
Next time just ask for giftcards to whatever bookstore you like to go to. That's what I do and it makes the whole process that much easier since if I can't figure out what I want in time, I can determine that later.

>> No.858227

>>858221
you are makin this a lot harder than it has to be bruv

>man does something stupid, is stupid
>woman does something stupid, is a woman

that's just stupid and you're stupid and stop being dumb, bruv

>> No.858240

>>858227

>Man does something stupid; he is stupid and is punished and hated
>Woman does something stupid; forgive her, she can't help it, she is a woman.

>> No.858258
File: 75 KB, 600x1267, 1277835601532.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
858258

You can just trade them OP, can't you? Well gonna greentext too, then.
>it's my birthday today
>buying Kafka on the Shore as my mom's present
>psp case plus Donkey Kong doll fro dad
>slightly more sad than usual

Eh, it's ok. maybe i should get friends for these kind of stuff.

>> No.858269

>>858258
no friends or gifts?

feels sad man

last year my best friend gave me a can of soup and i gave him a trout, fuck yeah birthday presents

>> No.858306

This thread turned out worse than I expected. Half the people in it are hating on me and the other half are responding to some attention slut.

>> No.858308

>>858306

Oh yeah? Well SO ARE YOU BUT WHAT AM I?

>> No.858310

>>858306
Then why are you bumping it, darling?

>> No.858316

>>858310
just making a comment. and don't call me darling. i hate it when people call me darling, sweetie pie, or anything stupid like that.

>> No.858326

>>858316
whatever you say....sugar

>> No.858327

>>858240
wow, you are reading some insane person's post. perhaps you could link it to me for i surely don't remember reading that post or making any of those points.

>> No.858331

>>858316

That's sad, darling sweetie pie.

>> No.858334

>>858316
You're kind of a bitch.

>> No.858336

>>858326
i hate you so much.
pig

>> No.858344

>>858334
because i don't like to be called degrading names like sweetie pie? okay.

>> No.858350

>>858344
Seems like we have reached an agreement then, baby.

>> No.858351

>>858344

It is no more degrading than Anna or Karen or any other name.

Words have only the power with which you invest them you crazy feminazi dumbass.

>> No.858358

>>858351
>Words have only the power with which you invest them

that's clearly untrue, sweetie

>> No.858360

>>858336
no need to hate me honey

>> No.858362

>>858351
This. A lot of people, males too, call other men darling. What's so degrading about it?

>> No.858364

>>858358

Really? You honestly think that words have an inherent power? That if people stopped responding to the word 'nigger' it would still somehow be offensive, even though no one is offended?

Jesus, you really are fucking nuts.

>> No.858367

This has the potential to be a "don't call me X, Y", friends.

>> No.858370

>>858336
calm down, honey.

>> No.858376

>>858351
Words have power over people even if the power only exists because we think it does. Since it is not in my power to make those words powerless I do care about their meaning and the way they are used. I hate those names because men use them to belittle women and make us out to be silly little creatures. I don't like to be treated that way.

>> No.858380

>>858364
hun, you know that's not what i mean.

words don't have the power that 'you' put on them, they have power and meaning put into them by society. it is not an act of interpretation by the person hearing it that makes 'nigger' hurtful; it is the meaning built up on the word in our society and the intent behind it

so, in other words, if you honestly think that words are only hurtful because the person hearing them is too easily offended, kindly stick it up your ass

>> No.858381

>>858362
only luvvies say darling, sweetness

>> No.858383

Any other women in this thread? What's you take on this?

>> No.858386

>>858336
what about sugar tits? is sugar tits acceptable?

>> No.858390

>>858376

One - You do have the power to dictate how those words make you feel. Stop being offended and BAM. They no longer are offensive.

Two - People use those words as terms of affection and endearment, not to "make women feel like silly creatures."

Did you father call you Darling while he molested you or something? Because there is no other reasonable explanation for you to resent something so trivial.

Psycho.

>> No.858394

>>858383
yo
I call everyone pet names, male friends too.
It doesn't bother me, you can tell by tone of voice if people mean it belittlingly irl.
Silly to get mad online, pet.

>> No.858397

>>858380

Yeah. And if niggers would stop being offended by the word nigger the word nigger would no longer be an offensive term, you fucking dense nigger.

>> No.858400

>>858390
One- No, I don't. I don't have perfect control over my emotions like some Bene Gesserit witch.

Two- They aren't mutually exclusive. Those terms, and much of the way men treat women, is contempt masked by adoration.

you sound like a sexist, no offense.

>> No.858404

>>858390
>You do have the power to dictate how those words make you feel. Stop being offended and BAM. They no longer are offensive.

"Stop being angry that someone is hitting you and BAM! its not a problem anymore." "Stop being annoyed at being enslaved and BAM! it's not a problem anymore."

>People use those words as terms of affection and endearment, not to "make women feel like silly creatures."

those two things are not mutually exclusive, you realize. things can be anti-feminist and still be wholly intended for the good of women.

>> No.858409

>>858400

And you sound like a man hating cunt.

No offense. SARCASM MOTHER FUCKER

>> No.858411

>>858362
I don't know any guys that call other men "darling" except those who accompany such names with a limp-wristed swat of the hand.

>> No.858413

>>858397
You are seriously dense. Whether or not African-Americans are offended by it, 'nigger' is still a hateful term. It has a history and a heritage of hate and you can't just go and ignore that. It is offensive, not because people are offended by it, but because of its history and the meaning given it by society. Your solution to this is simply to ignore all this, ignore the fact of its offensiveness, and pretend it never happened. But the word is still hateful.

>> No.858414

>>858409
you should tell that to my boyfriend.....he's a real man so he doesn't need to degrade me in order to feel good about himself or his gender.

>> No.858415

>>858404

Being physically assaulted is not even close to the same as being called a profane word and for you to even make that comparison shows how bloody idiotic you are.

Stick and stone, smartass. Jesus. They teach kids this stuff when they are too young to even say the words. You should have picked it up by now.

>> No.858416

>>858404
Well, there's a difference here. One is a word. The other is a physical object crushing your physical skull.
You know, pain n'shit

>> No.858423

>>858415
Obviously they are not the same. The point I am trying to make is that simply ignoring or accepting a situation is not the same as making that situation go away or solve the problem.

In your worldspace, the problem is that people object to the use of the word 'nigger' or the use of demeaning terms. That's the issue here - the objection. This is, simply, wrong.

>>858414
ohh no no no

this is a bad tactical move, imo

>> No.858424

>>858413

You are contradicting your own argument. You agree that society makes words offensive and yet refuse to consider that society can also make it no longer be so.

It is like arguing with a dust mite.

>> No.858433

>>858424
It's like arguing with a trooooll

>> No.858435

>>858413
words are a collection of syllables given meaning only by what we associate them with. people will continue to use words hatefully but just because they have an offensive history doesn't make them 'bad' or 'offensive' intrinsically. For example 'nitty gritty' probably originated with the filth of the slave ships but is used to refer to the center of things, the essence, without being offensive in the modern day.

>> No.858436

>>858414

Bullshit. He is a pussy and has been so emasculated by your bitchy cunt ways that he no longer even knows he is a man. You are the problem with the world.

To you, individuals cannot be equal, because when they are, you start screaming SEXIST and DEMEANING.

>> No.858442

>>858436
if only i would shut up and get in the kitchen like a good women, eh?

>> No.858446

Not a big deal read what you want and trade them in at your local used book store for trade credit.

Twilight can be taken back for cash easily to borders or bn

>> No.858452

>>858446

Oh shit, I realized you are a girl. I'm not supposed to offer advice, but sympathize with you

Your family is so lame for not getting what you want. I will cry with you

>> No.858454

>>858442

If you are really stupid enough to think that anyone actually takes that as anything but an easy, overused joke, you probably should just get the hell off the computer. You may think you are being sardonic, but you are really just putting up strawmen to avoid being told the fuck off for being stupid.

>> No.858458

>>858442
>a good women

>> No.858461

Indeed, I know that feeling OP. The thing is that they don't really want to hear about the books that you're interested in. It's just a never ending cycle.

>> No.858466

>>858461
is the 'they' in this sentance relating to /lit/ or the family?

>> No.858472

>>858458
it was just a typo

>> No.858481

This is why women should never be allowed to do anything, ever.

They are incapable of critical fucking thought and so full of bullshit superiority complexes that they can't even comprehend of the possibility that they might be wrong in their preconceived notions.

>> No.858482

Remember this: The op has had a dick her mouth. She has been bent over a coffee table and fucked by a man who slapped her ass while riding her. Female equality is a joke, sugar tits.

>> No.858483
File: 22 KB, 450x590, tinkertailor.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
858483

Has Lit ever read Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy?

>> No.858486

>>858483
nope, only spy who came in from the cold

>> No.858499

ITT: Condescending neckbeards.

>> No.858506

>>858499

ITP: A female trying to save face with herself by calling others names.

>> No.858527

>>858482
Why is sex always used as a demeaning factor? Everyone has sex, what's the deal with calling others sluts for that?
I, for example, love facesitting. In some sense that's demeaning, but are you telling me having a cock in your mouth is more insulting? They're essentially the same act.

>> No.858536

>>858481

Your mom clearly should not have been allowed to give birth to a dickcheese-head like you.

>> No.858545

>>858536

And clearly your mom should have been shot in the face until her brains oozed from the holes and the raped repeatedly until the fetus that was you began to ooze from the numerous new holes put into her body.

But unfortunately for the internet, that did not happen.

>> No.858546

>>858482

Spoken like a true virgin who has never had a girl on top and is too scared to go down on a girl. Way to go, meatbrain.

>> No.858557
File: 18 KB, 150x184, eddiemurphyreactionimage34.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
858557

>>858546

sure is raging girlfight in here

>> No.858559

>>858545

People were too busy stuffing their cocks into your dad's mouth and ass-raping him with gin bottles while he fucks your grandpa.

>> No.858563

>>858559

Is that supposed to be insulting?

>> No.858564

They bought you books. Shaddup.

>> No.858568

you guys are pretty bad at insulting each other

>> No.858569

>>858563
>>858559
>>858545
>>858536

BLOOD!!!
BLOOD!!!
BLOOD!!!

>> No.858574

>>858563

No, merely factual.

>> No.858577

>>858574

Nice lack of imagination, faggot.

>> No.858578

>>858568
No we're not you SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY SILLY anon

>> No.858587

>>858577

Dude, your come-backs don't even make sense.

>> No.858588

>>858568

You know who else is bad at insulting people?

YOU! HA.

>> No.858601

>>858587

And you are a feminist nigger.

Have fun never having any real friends.

>> No.858610

>>858601
>I won't be your internet friend, buddy

baaawwwwwww

>> No.858613

>>858588
no u

>> No.858616

>>858601
>And you are a feminist nigger.

At least it gets me laid. Unlike you, who have have to content with the animals or relatives on you farm.

>> No.858623

>>858616
>At least it gets me laid. Unlike you, who has to be content with the animals or relatives on your farm.
fixed

>> No.858625

>>858616

I have never understood why people would consider themselves better than someone else for something so trivial. Yeah, sex is fun, but how does that make virginity an insult?

In other words; you are a fucking idiot for thinking that you are better than someone on the internet because you assume they are a virgin.

>> No.858633

>>858625
Speaking as an experienced virgin, it does not feel good, man.

>> No.858634

>>858625

I have never understood why people would consider themselves better than someone else for something so trivial. Yeah, being a guy is fun, but how does the fact that someone is a girl make them inferior/stupid/worthy of abuse and condescension?

In other words; you are a fucking idiot for thinking that you are better than someone on the internet because they are a girl.

>> No.858639

>>858623

Thanks :-)

>> No.858641

>>858634

I never said I am better than you because you are a girl.

I am better than you because you are an stupid cunt for no reason.

>> No.858650

People in my family have bought me "young adult" fantasy books before. My favourite author is Dostoyevsky.

>> No.858658

>>858641
>I am better than you because
>you are an stupid cunt

>> No.858662

>>858564
+1

>> No.858707

>>858616
>At least it gets me laid. Unlike you
>Unlike you

Children, really?

>> No.858722

>>858707

Men, really?

>> No.858726

>>858722

SHUT THE FUCK UP

You are the only person who keeps blaming shit on a particular gender. Just stop that shit already, for fuck sake.

>> No.858728
File: 44 KB, 219x250, professorlol.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
858728

>>858722

>> No.858732

>>858726

No, YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU FUCKING CUNT.

>> No.858733

>>858726
I hope you realize that's a troll and not actually a woman.

>> No.858740
File: 32 KB, 350x400, 1272594538625.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
858740

Everyone in this thread is a troll trolling trolls.

>> No.858755

Birthday eight years ago, roughly:

>Ask for GCN for my birthday. Literally all I ask for.
>Mom hands me a GCN sized and shaped gift.
>Excitedly tear it open.
>It's a phone. Not a cellphone either, a landline.
>Have no friends. Always been a social outcast. No need for a phone.
>Run crying into room because I'm a ronery 10 year old.

That said, people usually just give me money for my birthday, or they take me shopping.

>> No.858764

I send my folks my Amazon wishlist before my birthday and Christmas. I may actually have to hold off this year, got nothing but books from both of them, hadn't anticipated the present surplus after they got divorced.

>> No.858773

>>858755
GCN?

>> No.858779

>>858764

Your father did good to divorce that brain-dead gold-digger.

>> No.858780

>>858779
Got lost on your way to /b/?

>> No.858789

>>858780

Got lost on your way to Bed, Baths and Beyond?

>> No.858790

>>858789
God I hate the summerfags.

>> No.858801

>>858790

God I hate EVERYTHING RRRRRRAAAAAAWWWWWWRRRRRG

>> No.858831

>>858755
>>858773
OH a gamecube
why is the N last anyway i never got that

>> No.859078

>>858831

The Neo Geo Color had already taken the acronym NGC, in North America at least.