/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.7912142]

>tfw no /lit/ gf like Rory

[Anonymous No.7912149]

>tfw no /lit/ gf like Hitler

[Anonymous No.7912167]

>>7912149
>Hitler
We know that guy, he was a famous farmer serf of Sweden blonde vaginas with King Fool project of set India rubber, tea and nettle plantations on North.

[Anonymous No.7912170]

>>7912142
>Gabler Ulysses
fucking no taste pleb

[Anonymous No.7912175]

>tfw no /lit/ gf like Paris

[Anonymous No.7912193]

>>7912142
>You will never EVER be trapped with her in an unheated cabin during a snowstorm and have to huddle together for warmth.

How do I continue to live?

[Anonymous No.7912202]

>tfw no gf at all

[Anonymous No.7912217]

>tfw no qt badboy bf
team jess

[Anonymous No.7912244]

>>7912202
Pretty good list, but fart doesn't really work for fuck

>Fart me harder, daddy!

Yeah, no.

[Anonymous No.7912266]

>>7912244
It lists 'fuck' as a curse word, not verb, pleb.
>Do big girl things to me harder, daddy!

[Anonymous No.7912270]

>>7912266
That just sounds awkward. I'm sure there's a cute-sounding word for "fuck" you could use

[Anonymous No.7912275]

>>7912270
phooey, fiddlesticks, and, fudge

[Anonymous No.7912276]

>>7912170
you just outed yourself pseud

that's stuart gilbert's ulysses

[Anonymous No.7912286]

>>7912276
Weird how the cover in the OP pic is very slightly different from that one

[Anonymous No.7912291]

>>7912202
Daddydoms are the only dominant men more pathetic and beta than submissive men

[Anonymous No.7912292]

>>7912286
it's not different

[Anonymous No.7912294]

>tfw no Jewish gf

[Anonymous No.7912306]

>>7912292
Gilbert's name is on the border in the OP pic, but not the one you posted

[Anonymous No.7912314]

>>7912291
Someone has to satisfy the desires of female infantilists

[Anonyrnous No.7912326]

>>7912142
>that lack of spine discipline

[Anonymous No.7912342]

>>7912294
Are you black or Christian? You might have a chance.

[Anonymous No.7913937]

>>7912142

[Anonymous No.7913956]

>>7912202
I wonder what the crossed out one originally said

[Anonymous No.7913975]

Every time I read James Joyce's Ulysses, I see it in a whole new way. This begs the question, has the book changed, or have I?

[Anonymous No.7914005]

>>7913956
My guess is "Cumming (or slang)"

[Anonymous No.7914030]

>you will NEVER live on a small quad of old stone buildings with leaded windows
>you will NEVER steer a gondola as your qt RP-accented gf giggles and tells you not to crash
>you will NEVER take a walk along the river with your qt privately educated girlfriend on a frosty February
>you will NEVER attend a formal ball with your qt Hermione-esque gf who blushes when she sees your reaction to the dress she's wearing
>you will NEVER have an hour-long discussion with a jaded, witty professor who finds you "utterly intriguing" and leave his office to find your qt gf pretending to read an advertisement pinned to his noticeboard
>you will NEVER ride old-fashioned bicycles across cobblestone streets beside your qt gf and laugh as you speed down a hill with your legs outstretched
>you will NEVER share a cheap bottle of red wine with your qt Home Counties gf while listening to Cocteau Twins in her dorm with candles providing the only light
>you will NEVER arrive a little late to a raucous, controversial debate at the Union and sneak in with your qt gf, ducking and offering whispered apologies as you make your way to some spare seats
>you will literally, unironically NEVER take a slow walk beside your qt vaguely artistocratic gf through the fallen leaves of a quiet park and make her smile as she clutches her coursebooks across her chest
>you will NEVER sit in a small concert theatre and watch your qt gf playing viola and experience a overwhelming feeling of pure love for the girl you one day hope to marry
>you will NEVER run through heavy rain to your qt elite gf's dorm and have her hug your drenched coat and hair as you provide whispered encouragement about her exam the following day
>you will NEVER stand on the lighted porch of your home watching your parents through the frosted glass as they approach to open the door and feel your bookish gf squeeze your hand a little tighter
>you will NEVER read Cat on a Hot Tin Roof in bed with your refined intelligent gf and try to stop yourself from laughing as she adopts different and exaggerated accents for the characters she's voicing
>you will NEVER sit at the dinner table in your qt posh gf's home and have her mother express her genuine shock at the fact you're from a poor background and have her father respect you a little more for turning out the way you have despite that
>you will NEVER sit up in bed still half-asleep and slowly unwrap one of the gift's your qt attentive gf got you for your birthday and have her stand with her hands behind her back with her lips pursed in anticipation of your response to the books she has spent time researching in the hope they will be ones you enjoy

[Anonymous No.7914045]

>>7914030
You almost got there, a little too anime.

[Anonymous No.7914048]

>>7914045
I don't understand this criticism. What do you mean? In my unironic view those greentexts represent the aesthetical peak of human romantic relationships.

[Anonymous No.7914066]

>>7914048
They were close. But parts like
>you will NEVER ride old-fashioned bicycles across cobblestone streets beside your qt gf and laugh as you speed down a hill with your legs outstretched
>you will literally, unironically NEVER take a slow walk beside your qt vaguely artistocratic gf through the fallen leaves of a quiet park and make her smile as she clutches her coursebooks across her chest
change it to an anime aesthetic, which makes the whole thing fall back to nothing but a childish fantasy which you were so skillfully avoiding.

[Anonymous No.7914111]

>>7914066
The first one is humorously over-imagined I admit, in the sense that it's the kind of thing you would not enjoy in real life but which is often depicted in advertisements etc, but the second is so cute and appealing I just don't see your objection here. Just imagine walking across a public park after a lecture and feeling weirdly self-aware about how young you are and how energetic and relatively beautiful you are and how the person beside you is so beautiful too and how you are both subtly communicating your desire for one another and your appreciation for each other's company without having that fact interrupt your conversation and how at ease you are knowing that later that day, or that week, or at some point in the near future you will kiss this girl and her heart will be beating just as fast as yours will and how you will both feel that one glorious thing that all the songs and movies and books you have ever consumed have paid tribute to as best they could. You have to be literally aspergic not to see the aesthetic appeal of such a scenario IMO, and I'm pretty autistic myself.

[Anonymous No.7914132]

>>7912142
Hey, I watched gilmore girls last week and Rory is the typical female who loves to be provided for by men(the first beta was building her a car...) while despising this, through being reminded of her easy life for being:
-a woman
-not a an ugly woman
-a family which has a network
-loving to spread her legs (especially when it suits her)
her friend paris is the same with being fucked by the writer.

I did wank to her though. I loved when she cried in her bathroom and asking why logan did not like her back.
I also wanted to take Paris and Rory in double penetration

[Anonymous No.7914149]

>>7914111
>never go full retard

This is just a guess, but you've never actually fucked, have you?

[Anonymous No.7914266]

>>7912142
>tfw no qt autistic bookworm gf

[Anonymous No.7914272]

>>7914132
good post

[Anonymous No.7914278]

>>7912286
>weird

It's just an older edition.

[Anonymous No.7914297]

>>7912142
What, some fucking pleb who cracks the spine of a book? Disgusting whore.

[Anonymous No.7914311]

>>7914297
It looks paperback in OP's photo. There's literally nothing wrong with cracking the spine of paperback books

[Anonymous No.7914321]

>>7914030
Fuck

[Anonymous No.7914352]

>>7913956
Was just in a kik groupchat for people with ddlg interests, can confirm

[Anonymous No.7914357]

>>7912306
look closer, autismo.
It's the low quality of pic causing blurred indistinct borders between yellow and light grey.

[Anonymous No.7914363]

>>7914266
fuck, she's cute

[Anonymous No.7914367]

>>7914357
Pretty sure you're the autistic one here. Look at the pictures again.

[Anonymous No.7914387]

>>7913975
>This begs the question
I think a fellow ought learn English before reading Ulysses. Try that.

[Anonymous No.7914399]

>>7914387
What is incorrect about saying 'this begs the question'?

[Anonymous No.7914418]

>>7914399
That's not the correct use for that expression, but rather how retards who want to sound intelligent use it

[Anonymous No.7914427]

>>7914399
https://duckduckgo.com/?q=begging+the+question

[Anonymous No.7914436]

>>7914418
I think it's pretty likely that the poster knew the general way the expression is used and just transferred it to a different grammatical position.Besides which if you type that into google you get rather a lot of hits, which would imply that people do use it that way. I agree it doesn't sound that elegant though.

[Anonymous No.7914439]

>>7914030
>you will NEVER EVER be living in a foreign country temporary and start seeing a nice girl with a nice family, and when it comes time for you to leave you both start getting sad and on edge but then you confess your love to each other and decide to stay together no matter what

I had this feel last night.

[Anonymous No.7914450]

>>7914436
The general way the expression is used is the way retards who want to sound intelligent but don't know what it actually means use it. People who are educated use the expression in its original, correct manner.

[Anonymous No.7914459]

>>7914450
Very few people are educated anymore. Were you taught Latin and Greek as a schoolboy? Have you read the various scholarly histories of Europe?

[Anonymous No.7914540]

>>7914030
I hate living

[Anonymous No.7914659]

>>7914450

I think it's a bit hypocritical to pedantically insist on the 'correct' usage of a phrase which was only the product of a mistranslation in the first place.

A few hundred years ago you would have been the guy arguing that 'begging the question' is an expression used by retards who want to sound intelligent but don't actually know the Latin roots of the phrase; people who are educated would just say 'petitio principii' or, if one must debase the concept with a vernacular translation, 'requesting first principles' would be far more to the point.

[Anonymous No.7914701]

>tfw hit it off with some girl from tinder who "luvs reading"
>invites me to her house after the coffee date went well
>finally end my 1 year dry spell
>start going on dates and things are going well
>it's happening!
>invite her over to my house to watch Un Homme Qui Dort because it's my favourite
>brings beer but I tell her it's not a good idea for me to drink
>says she trust me and doesn't mind seeing my drunk self
>start getting drunk and she tells me how reading harry potter changed her life
>I start laughing
>she asks what funny
>I sperg out and tell her how bad harry potter is.
>she starts crying and ends leaving right before we watch Un Homme Qui Dort
>starts avoiding me and barely answering my text
>give up and delete her number


I do this to myself :(

[Anonymous No.7914703]

>>7914701
un homme qui dort is a fantastic film though so at least you have patrician taste.

have you read the perec novel?

[Anonymous No.7914730]

I'm pretty sure I'm going to die virgin, I'm too psychologically fucked.