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/lit/ - Literature

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6471551 No.6471551 [Reply] [Original]

ITT: What would be the title of your biography?

>> No.6471556

>>6471551
His twisted world.

>> No.6471558

Malife

>> No.6471564

>>6471551
"Decades of Solitary Media Consumption- or, Boring Shit No-One Should Read"

>> No.6471568

Faces in a subway cart, speeding away.

>> No.6471578

"The Brilliant autistical misadventures of a man trying to find meaning in his life"

>> No.6471584

>>6471551
The Pleb.

>> No.6471717

>>6471551

Apathy's Rainbow.

>> No.6471734

The Wanker in the Rye

>> No.6471739

>>6471551
Welcome to Blunderdome.

>> No.6471742
File: 1.25 MB, 2448x2448, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6471742

"This isn't what I ordered."

>> No.6472546

Spicy Meatballs

First line
>It was the best of times for spicy meatballs and it was also like say for example the worst of times for spicy meatballs.

>> No.6472602

>>6471551
>>6471551
The Virgin Gary

>> No.6472609

>>6471551
The Temptations of Lemon
A group of tales of thirsty iguana's deadly fight

>> No.6472610

Neographia

>> No.6472611

120 Years of Sodom

>> No.6472614

Everyone's a cunt but me

>> No.6472622

Ennui, an Anon's Tale

or

Aporia, an Anon's Tale

>> No.6472847

>>6471551

Chronicles of a Class Clown

>> No.6472852

Anusbomber: from womb to tomb

>> No.6472872
File: 42 KB, 337x500, today i wrote nothing.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6472872

This seems applicable to all of /lit/.

>> No.6472875
File: 1.46 MB, 217x217, yess.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6472875

Forty Years Under Your Mom
Thus Spoke My Asshole
The Brothers Suckuzoff
Spunk Flew Over Your Mothers Chest

>> No.6472885

Love and Hookers, Drugs and Stories:

The Life and Times of Anon Nymous

>> No.6472937

>>6471551
Opus 28 No. 18

>> No.6472970

>>6471551
HAHA WHAT A STORY me the story of me if or: to not like anything i don't really everyone go home

It's going to be a metaphysical autobiography of my life told through a non-existent manifestation of James Joyce

>> No.6472984

Daddy Issues

>> No.6472985

>>6471551
My Struggle

>> No.6472994

>>6471551
don't you mean autobiography?

>> No.6473006

Anomie and I: a timeline of personal regression

>> No.6473040

>>6472994
If you are holding a biography (about your life) in your hands, is it an autobiography?

>> No.6473046

>>6471551
The seven storie mountain with less sin, and less monk

>> No.6473054

If it was an autobiography?

"A Selfie in Fluorescent Light"

>> No.6473080

>>6471551
"Normal man's guide to misery, or, Exactly what not to do: a linear reference"

>> No.6473104

>>6471551
>The Art of Racing in the Rain:
>Now with 25% less sorrow and 50% less dog!

>> No.6474158

>>6471551
When I've Raised Hell

>> No.6474179

The Babysitter's On Acid: A Portrait Of Contemporary America

>> No.6474185

Thanatropic Schizotechnics

>> No.6474189

why.jpg

>> No.6474198

>>6471551
An Essay on Boredom.

>> No.6474208

The Boob Slayer
The tragedy of being different

>> No.6474391

A Pointless Existence

>> No.6474452

Enter: Fuccboi

>> No.6474792

>>6471551
Why did you publish this book?
It is horribly boring.

>> No.6474806
File: 5 KB, 645x773, feels.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6474806

>>6471551
'He Knew That Feel'

>> No.6474877
File: 456 KB, 480x361, river.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6474877

>>6474806
deep shit

>> No.6474880

"please help"
(No, Don't Help)

>> No.6474910

>>6471558
>>6471739
>>6472609
>>6472852
>>6473080
>>6474198
would read

>>6471578
>>6471717
>>6471734
>>6472614
>>6472875
>>6473006
>>6473054
>>6474158
>>6474189
>>6474452
>>6474806
>>6474806
would burn

>>6472546
would giggle uncontrollably, then burn

>> No.6474931

Niggers was the first thing i noticed

>> No.6474935

Here Comes Anybody

>> No.6474945

Looking for home in the ruins of glory

>> No.6474947

Underachiever: A chronicle of coulda been.

>> No.6474951

Live on the road, die on the road

>> No.6474955

>>6471551

My Big Dick: I Actually Have a Small Dick

by John "Big Dick" Wrath

>> No.6474956

Journey to the darkest hatred

>> No.6475140

the swan doesn't scapegoat

>> No.6475171

>>6474956
>Journey to the darkest hatred
Is your name Not Important?

>> No.6475178

>>6471551

"I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt."

>> No.6475184

>>6475178

this is a great one

>> No.6475210

I Can't Believe I Got Around to Finishing This: A Procrastinator's Life

>> No.6475213

Pseudepigraphia of a village idiot.

>> No.6475219

Samson Among the Philistines

>> No.6475243

Shut up; Mnemosyne

>> No.6475244

The World Is Fucked I Quit

>> No.6475332

>>6474910
Literally know one cares. I care just slightly enough to tell you this.

>> No.6475347

>>6475332
>know
No objection to anything you're saying, but thought I ought advise, it's probably time to get to bed.

>> No.6475552
File: 81 KB, 801x639, 1414927765194.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6475552

>He Never Scored

>> No.6475567

confessions of an emotional pervert

>> No.6475570

"It wasn't that much to begin with"

>> No.6475571

The Adventure of the Author As A Young Man - A Confession Revisited

>> No.6476088

Useless

>> No.6476096

Adventures in Agoraphobia

>> No.6476145

>>6471551
Apathetic Powerlessness

>> No.6476277

An exercise in Control- A tragedy in five sketches

>> No.6476292

Dramatic Irony

>> No.6476299

Homebound: A Lifeless Life

>> No.6477041

>>6471551
Fat Lenny

>> No.6477043

Notes from Underground

>> No.6477047

>>6471551
The Weight of Ugly

>> No.6477074

From the pen to the trash: the story of my life

>> No.6477078

Happy Colored Marbles

>> No.6477082

Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life

>> No.6477098
File: 6 KB, 168x113, 10373374-mature-man-using-computer-drinking-tea-looking-at-camera-smiling.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6477098

The boring philosophical life and misery of a depressed writer and poet scared of everything

>> No.6477158

>>6471551
Much Ado About Nothing.

>> No.6477182

>>6477158
Did you know, Much Ado is basically one long sex joke.
'Nothing' used to be a euphemism for fuckin'

>> No.6477199

>>6472852
>>6476277
>>6474955
Laughed

>> No.6477207

Story about a virgin, teetotaller, weak autist

PD: I actually like my life, ok? Lozers.

>> No.6477210

How I learned to love stupidness

>> No.6477269

"How to fuck up constantly."

>> No.6478084

Eternal Virtual Reclusion: The Boring Tales of a Child Who Never Left His Computer

>> No.6478393

A Portrait of the Autist as a Sad Man

>> No.6478417

"Making cool tricks on the waves of sailed boats - A story about a mundane life"

>> No.6478421

>>6471551
This is Fine

>> No.6478602

>>6478393
>tfw british people say artist like autist
lel

>> No.6478726
File: 1.01 MB, 864x1424, hey mom.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6478726

Pic related.

>> No.6478740

>>6475347
Sorry my roommate was having loud sex with some slut last night and I was trying very hard to ignore it and surpress my innate desire to make love to him. Made my proof reading shabby.

>> No.6478944

"Title"

>> No.6478982

Onward Journey

>> No.6479090

It wasn't like in my anime's

>> No.6479281
File: 196 KB, 500x500, Death_is_Certain.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6479281

That He Not Die on Earth Amongst Mortals

>> No.6479622

Why Not?: A Memoir

>> No.6479646

>>6471551
Failed Abortion

>> No.6479667

>>6471551
The Idiot.

>> No.6479739

My Life - The Typo

>> No.6479744

The penis of the artist as a young man

>> No.6479754

Autistic Delusions

>> No.6480181

Get These Women Off My Dick: The Story of the Man With the Biggest Penis.

>> No.6480241

>>6471551
Perception personified.
What ever I am, I know that I perceive. Perceive like no other I know. My autobiography would be close to incomprehensible. But I'm not so arrogant to think there aren't similar minds out there. And to them, my journey would not be absurd, but would be received with empathy and could perhaps even enlighten.

>> No.6480462

wow this thread is literally the edgiest thing on /lit/ right now
i hope none of you guys are being serious

>> No.6480465

>>6480462
everything on /lit/ floats in an ether of sincerity and irony, didn't you know?

>> No.6481002

>>6480462
>wow this thread is literally the edgiest thing on /lit/ right nowi hope none of you guys are being serious

I hope that you don't really /lit/ that seriously

>> No.6481039

All the Dildos You Cannot See

>> No.6481058

Worms shall try that long preserved virginity - a cautionary biography

>

>> No.6481062
File: 530 KB, 607x537, 02 - BFhauud.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6481062

Half Breed
Frat Boy
Croissants And Sausage For Breakfast
In Which I Attempt To Construct A Novel

>> No.6481065
File: 70 KB, 581x569, 1429774356630.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6481065

>>6481062
What sort of text wrapping bullshit is this

>> No.6481886

>>6471551
my name of course

fucking question is that?

>> No.6481905

"was it rape?"

>> No.6482087

test

>> No.6483947

>>6477098
Underated post

>> No.6483951

Parties Give me Panic Attacks
And Sex Gives me Seizures

>> No.6484511

Cold, Naked and Alone

>> No.6485898

>>6471551
The life and death of a man who read books in the age of modernism and decline, or: Don Quixote, second part.

>> No.6485908

>>6473080
10/10

>> No.6485981

Solace in México: The Life of Daniel Nicoletti

>> No.6485987
File: 51 KB, 349x524, lemony_snicket_a_series_of_unfortunate_events_the_bad_beginning_cover.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6485987

>>6471551

>> No.6485995

"Never Gonna Give You Up: Or A Sad Tale Of A Retard's Quest for Meaning"

>> No.6486007
File: 30 KB, 118x126, reality.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6486007

I was a young rich good looking model with a young model girlfriend and I want everyone to know and that's why I wrote that book

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOHDkIxyu2A

https://instagram.com/jayalvarrez/

>> No.6486013

"Check Em: The Double Life of 4chan's Most Prestigious Dubs Claimer"

>> No.6486036

>>6486007
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOHDkIxyu2A
Remembers me of Limitless.
>procrastinating writer
>takes ritalin+modafinil
>suddenly supergenius
>this video more or less plays

Loved the movie.
Wish I "knew what to do and how to do it".

>> No.6486082

Between Heaven and Autism: a postmodernist's quest for meaning

>> No.6486105
File: 116 KB, 310x425, n-no_homo.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6486105

>>6486036
You're right, the cut is like that.
I wonder who edited this - I mean they go on vacation but get so many good "scenes" wtf, what's the moviation, really. Validation.

Also, that movie was cool - the end was odd and the whole thing morally doubtful. Anyway, when I got out of the cinema, I was in the mood to lift.

Regarding topic, my very favorite autobiography title is Heisenbergs "Der Teil und das Ganze"
i.e.
"The part and the whole"
which here has double meaning regarding his -life- as such on the one hand, and the subject of his lifelong study, -atomic physics- on the other.
I'd want to come up with such a pun.

I'm not even 30 now, though, I think (hope) the main part is still ahead of me. To be honest I don't know where I'm going right now.

So coming back to (>>6486036), what are you quoting there at the end?

>> No.6486124

If you love me, you'd drink this.

>> No.6486157

>>6486105
>wtf, what's the moviation, really.
Besides validation he probably makes money with it.

>I want you to live the life I ahve
He probably offers seminars or something. However considering he drives those cars and lives in this nice house, he probably doesn't have to.

Maybe he does it for himself to watch later, but also publishes on youtube, to connect to similar people, to be found, to revel in appreciation and madness of the plebes. And because he put enough effort into it to show it off.

Hm.

> I was in the mood to lift.
I knew that feel. I actually cleaned up my room instead.

It was eerily motivating, despite the fact that he cheated with chemicals. Man, the guy who worked his way to the top with sweat and effort couldn't keep up with the young dynamic drug user. This is technically not motivating at all.

>> No.6486170

>>6486105
The quote is from the movie after the pill scene.

After fucking the Asian he is in his room and cleans up. As soon as he's ready he says "What was this drug? Something to make me more anal retentive?" etc... then "knew what to do and how to do it" and he sits down and writes his book in a day.

It's interesting as I know what to do and more or less also how to do it, but my procrastination and comfort addicted brain cannot just *do* it, because I let my mind, maturity and "anima" go to shit.

>> No.6486181

>>6486105
>>6486170
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCVAkXCm9Ss

>> No.6486183

>>6486157
The blood drinking wasn't sexy either.
But the charming any neighbor into instant leg spread was.

>> No.6486817

>>6475210

If I were to write a memoir, it would likely get wrapped up on my death bed. Just something invigorating about pressing deadlines, ya know?

>> No.6486890

>>6471551
Upper-Middle Class White Man and his Search for Suffering.

>> No.6486894

Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life

>> No.6486906
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6486906

Milady

>> No.6487263
File: 16 KB, 600x655, 1422528195175.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6487263

>>6471551
>Insatiable Thirst, Or Love From A Distance
>Biography Of A Man Who Lived In A Time When Penises Were Different Sizes
>The Man Who Apologized For Dying
>A Series Of Diseases And Reflections
>Daring To Finger Yourself In The Shower
>Living To Be Afraid Of Dying
>And Other Such Things

>> No.6487853

>>6471551
A Dream Before Dying

>> No.6487857

drab days and dreary nights

>> No.6487862

Wasting Away on 4chan

>> No.6487876

River Run Down

>> No.6487883

>>6487263
I'd read them all—or at least download them on libgen and store them in my dropbox

>> No.6487895

>>6471551
"A Collection of Short Essays on The Experience of One Man"

>> No.6487901

Wish a Nigga Would

>> No.6487902

>>6471551
Unforeseen Circumstances

>> No.6487973

>>6475347
What's wrong? He simply wanted that poster to know that one cares; only if just enough to remind him that his efforts have been in vain

>> No.6487991
File: 345 KB, 498x568, 1430029048640.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6487991

"Get in the Call Faggot: The Story of a Proxy Socialite Mishap"

>> No.6487993
File: 461 KB, 651x965, 1425065080155.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6487993

pic related

>> No.6488018

Heresiology in Reeboks: Boyz N The Hood as White Gnostic Tragedy

>> No.6488594

>>6487883
Thanks anon, that feels nice.

>> No.6488621
File: 41 KB, 550x512, 1425839461500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
6488621

No, You're fucked!

>> No.6488627

>>6471551
Mine would be

Just Farting Around

based on one of my favorite quotes:

“I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.”
― Kurt Vonnegut, A Man Without a Country

>>6487993
It is, but I think Vonnegut's way of putting it is more fun.