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/lit/ - Literature

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646033 No.646033 [Reply] [Original]

Opening to my first book. This book is wholly devoted to practice. What does /lit/ think?

The seal was closed. All there was left to do was to enter the last chamber himself. He had never quite agreed with the others methodology in dealing with the population. He had never quite felt the same rigor, at least in the same frequency, that the others had felt. Twelve decades of labor, self-sacrifice, and intolerance had led up to this very last moment.
The others had trusted him to lock the last doors and seal the seals. He was the most honest, the purest. Now, in the finality of the century old act, he hesitated.
He lay down on the cold cushions and slammed his own seal shut, locking it from the inside as he had trained to do. If his face was to be seen it could have only been the look one has when a chance passes by and it is not realized until after the face. Perhaps that evasive feeling he had with the others had finally been named only when it was too late.

>> No.646037

Boring

>> No.646038

"after the face" lol

>> No.646045

> If his face was to be seen it could have only been the look one has when a chance passes by and it is not realized until after the face.

What?

>> No.646047

Vague. It's acceptable for the audience to be unsure of what's going on, but they must immediately be interested in it. What's at stake for the reader here?

>> No.646052

>>646037
it is very undramatic

Please: show, don't tell

>> No.646054

>>646045
I guess it's something you're supposed to know intuitively

>> No.646062

>>646054

That sentence completely broke the flow, though, suggest rewording.

Also, I spotted;

>with the others methodology

Should be na apostrophe after the s in others.

Otherwise, was interesting.
Pretty, good, I think.

>> No.646067
File: 3 KB, 101x126, self_portrait_1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646067

DICKS EVERYWHERE

>> No.646069

Your syntax is no.

>> No.646081

>>646069
ROFLAMO

>> No.646082

It's the opening. Everything will be explained in the rest of the book. This was mostly a hook. The vagueness is intentional so that a reader's interest is captured.

>> No.646089

>>646082
I wasn't interested at all and it sounds like a boring, generic fantasy book

>> No.646093

ho,y shit I couldn't even get pat the first paragraph

>> No.646097

>>646082
>vagueness
>interest

TIME TO GO BACK TO CREATIVE WRITING 101 OP

>> No.646099

>>646082
This is the least interesting hook I've ever seen.
If someone sees a jumble of vague and uninteresting references and events, they will not want to continue reading.
It kind of sucks.

>> No.646109

I won't touch on the "face" sentence since someone else mentioned it, other than to say it was the absolute worst part of this sample.

You used the word "others" too three times in this sample.

You used the word "seal" 4 times. In one sentence you used it two times.

Very little is happening in these sentences, and I do not just mean action wise. I mean that there is very little description and clarification.

The active and passive voice is traded around too much already to make this a coherent work.

Too much "I'll explain later" allusions in such a small piece with the only interaction being between the protagonist and the seal--neither of which are defined. The allusions that can use some bit of ellaboration are:

chamber, others, methodology, population, frequency, twelve decades, trusted, century old [sic.], cushions, trained

All of these should be a sentence on their own or possibly a paragraph, otherwise the reader is given images too vague to care about, let alone piece together.

The final two sentences demand a complete re-write.

>> No.646122

>Being vague captures the reader's attention!

Who taught you this? Because it sure as shit ain't true.

>> No.646123

>>646082
Vagueness is one thing, but as a reader, I get the immediate impression that the author does not know what he is trying to express. This feels like a lifeless and rather hackneyed attempt at writing.

If you want to be vague, give us some reason to immediately care about the character or his actions.

>> No.646139
File: 40 KB, 798x500, lulz2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646139

>The others had trusted him to lock the last doors and seal the seals.

>> No.646141

>>646089
It's actually intended to be about a man who comes back from conquering the universe, simply because he wanted to.
He comes back to find the earth in a state of forced dormancy because of the need to keep nature at its optimal level.

This nigger is badass too. When he was in his prime (thousands of years ago) people learned to fear the sound of his name. Now it's become an instinct to the people he meets while on earth.

There are also booby traps setup by the people who are now in cryogenic sleep to prevent the suppression from being broken.

It's intended to be a story about a badass guy beating the shit out of people who won't live for themselves.

>> No.646145

>>646141

/thread

>> No.646146

>> after the face

Good. Lord.
OP probably meant fact. After the fact. Damn.

>> No.646147

>>646141
Conquers the universe and the Earth is still there when he comes back? Nigger must be Santa Claus.

>> No.646148

you are now aware /lit/ likes shitty writing best

>> No.646150

>>646141
Wow I was even more right than I thought I was

>> No.646151

Spoiler: "He" is Deryk.

>> No.646152

I just picked up 3 books sitting at the end of my desk that are of different genres, by different authors, at different stages of their careers. Here are the very first sentences.

"Balloon Tying for Christ was the cheapest balloon manual I could find." (Clown Girl by Monica Drake)

"Killing people is so easy that the Iron Laws of supply and demand make it hard to earn a decent living doing it." (Absolute Rage by Robert K. Tannenbaum)

"It was reported that Tanuki fell from the sky using his scrotum as a parachute." (Villa Incognito by Tom Robbins)

Ask yourself, what have these three published writers done in the very first sentence of their books that the OP has not?

>> No.646153

>>646150

lol

>> No.646154

>>646152

Shit, I'm not the only one. I picked up 3 or 4 sci-fi/fantasy novels just to make sure they didn't have an opening this shitty.

>> No.646157

>> After the face is now a meme.

>> No.646170

>>646157
Memes are for wankers.

>> No.646171

>>646062
>>646097
>>646109
>>646122
>>646152
OP here. Thanks /lit/.

>>646139
I lol'D hard.

>> No.646192

>>646033
Then here, start the book like this:

"Jerry was a little exhausted after his trip back to earth. Conquering the universe wasn't as difficult a task as as he had expected, but riding in that Osmium alloy space frigate was enough to make him abandon every goal and seek ass comfort from a Thai massage parlor. Here at the airlocks, standing on legs shaky and throbbing with the sugar pins of sleep like bees swarming up and down his calf muscles, he applied the seal to the door as the Others had trusted him to do. As he was /trained/ to do. Twelve decades of labor, self-sacrifice, and intolerance has led up to this single act.

/Booby traps/, he realized. /They set booby traps/. Being no booby, rather a badass nigger whose very name evoked fear in the hearts of every earthling for the last one thousand years, he gritted his teeth and soured. Forced cryogenic dormancy or not, the saboteurs were about to taste a flow so filthy that surviving generations would have to invent new words for the savage tortures that he was about to administrate. They will huddle around campfires in caves for the next few centuries, telling boogey man tales to their feral children about this day. Jerry is home. And Jerry is not happy.

>> No.646196

>>646192
If OP actually names his universe-conquering badass Jerry I will love you forever.

>> No.646198

>>646192
> the sugar pins of sleep-like bees swarming up and down his calf muscles

Oh god, Candyland has gone wrong, very wrong.

>> No.646202
File: 38 KB, 308x390, Man reading book laughingl.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646202

>>646157

Great, let's start forcing it

>> No.646208

>>646192

10/10

>> No.646209

>>646192
Less OP. More Jerry. Even though they are the same story, I want to read Jerry.

>> No.646216
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646216

>>646192

LOL OP writes a shitty opening, then anon comes in and makes it into something that the author could not: interesting.

>> No.646221
File: 16 KB, 265x261, john-madden-thumb.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646221

>>646216

Well, now that we have a firm grasp of the obvious...

>> No.646231

>>646192
The villain's name will be Newman

>> No.646237

>>646231
The hero's name should be Oldman.

>> No.646246
File: 42 KB, 337x506, 200410324-001a.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646246

seals

>> No.646254
File: 547 KB, 1185x1618, mr-t.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646254

>>646237
>didn't get the seinfeld reference

>> No.646255

>>646237
and some random piece of shit must be named David Mcdavidson. Trust me, I know this shit

>> No.646269

Requesting the OP let >>646192 take your work and completely re-write it.

>> No.646271

>>646269
protip: revision sucks as well. It just looks better

>> No.646281

>>646196
>>646198
>>646208
>>646209
>>646216
>>646269
>>646271

I wrote that in a minute or 2 after reading OP's intention according to >>646141.

For the record, I think it is a horrible plot and I think this story should not be written. I just wanted to give the OP an off the cuff example of how he could pace his story better or at least breathe a little life into it. You have to understand that it is similar to giving CPR to a dog with a mouthful of shit.

>> No.646307

This is fucking terrible.

Sophomoric writing.

>> No.646317
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646317

>>646307
Soporific, even

>> No.646325

Also this kind of sounds Fallout 3ish for some reason.

You know that final mission.

Come on you know.

>> No.646348

For those of you skimming, here is a summary:

He either applied the seal or hesitated.

That is all

>> No.646369

Needs more substance and less description, etc.

You're describing something that sounds interesting in a boring way.

>> No.646370
File: 29 KB, 1100x825, Untitled.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646370

>> No.646375

>>646317

yeah and it's making me fall asleep

>> No.646410
File: 331 KB, 610x1626, sb56-punchmaster.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646410

>>646141
Op you realize that this story has already been written? See pic, it is the exact same as your plot.

>> No.646438

OP here. I just made a title to the book. I haven't gotten any farther than what you see in the first post but at least now I have a title!

The Seals

What does /lit/ think?

>> No.646443

>>646438

Troll

>> No.646477

>>646438
It's not a troll, I swear. I really love seals.

>> No.646485

Appalling lack of literacy for an aspiring writer.

>> No.646509
File: 95 KB, 487x350, 79393924.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
646509

OP here. OK I took your advice and re-wrote the beginning to keep the vagueness I want, yet give it some substance. Remember, this book is wholly devoted to practice. Tell me what you think now, /lit/.

The seal was closed. Seals trained him how to seal the seals and now it was sealed. Sea Lions and Sea Horses sealed the deals when wheels pealed in the field without yield. As he kneeled, with a peel on his heel, he lifted his meal. It looked like nothing real. Grease was congealed into a teal deal of veal that tasted of steel. This ordeal was not ideal, as the eels once revealed. He keeled. His name was Jerry O'Neal.

>> No.646545

>>646509
At least it is clearer

>> No.646550

>>646033
ITT: Twelve decades = One century

>> No.646553

>>646550
wat

>> No.646585

OP will never again ask for criticism. He will forever sit in a closet, scribbling sentence fragments and reminding himself that he is the best of the best.

>> No.646589
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646589

>>646509

>> No.646728

Best /lit/ thread in weeks

>> No.646752

it seems like you have a good idea, but some of the wording is really awkward and, to be honest, it was difficult for me to read.

>> No.646764

>>646752 is OP

>> No.646984

OP here. Are these replies all coming from guys? I'd like to get some input from women because I have a natural ability to appeal to women's mentality.

>> No.647165

The pacing is too quick, choppy, and the wording is really weird. That's perfectly normal for a first draft, though. Just forget about criticism, and correcting the flow of things until you're at least a couple chapters in. If you stop every paragraph for advice, or to correct everything, you'll never finish anything ever.

>> No.647359

OP my advice is: read more.

>> No.647390
File: 56 KB, 358x477, 200539925-005.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647390

This is a very good thread. /lit/ has such talent!

<------- Pic of OP for back of dust jacket

>> No.647416
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647416

>>646033
>>646033
>>646033
>My face when i read this

>> No.647417

>>646033
I like it. It makes me want to read on.

>> No.647420

>>647417 is OP

>> No.647422

>>647420
You had that impression too?

>> No.647423

>>647420
Who the fuck are you, shithead?

>> No.647428

>>647420
>>647423
Sounds like OP to me.

>> No.647431
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647431

>>647423

I am Jerry, Destroyer of the Universe (because I wanted to). From now on you will speak only when spoken to and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be "sir". Do you maggots understand me?

>> No.647433

>>647431
all hail

>> No.647443

>>646141
>It's actually intended to be about a man who comes back from conquering the universe, simply because he wanted to.
This is a very shitty reason. What does he get out of conquering? I am so fucking mad at you...

>> No.647515

/lit/, i cant believe this... i been throught a fking shitty day and you people are making my night, seriously, not even /b/ could do that... all you are saying to this guy its just so mean and funny.

This is now my favorite forum.

Thanks.

>> No.647550
File: 72 KB, 407x405, Foul-Bachelor-Frog-Twelve-Decades-same-as-a-century.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647550

>> No.647553
File: 74 KB, 407x405, Foul-Bachelor-Frog-Lock-the-last-doors-Seal-the-seals.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647553

>> No.647555
File: 65 KB, 350x218, lulz.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647555

>>647550

>> No.647564

So far this thread is fail.

I have a feeling that if Hemingway came back from the fucking dead, and because he was suffering from head trauma he decided to post his next work on /lit/, /lit/ would have nothing - NOTHING - good to say about it.

>> No.647568

>>647564

I have a feeling you're some sort of butthurt faggot who has previously posted his work on /lit/ only to get fucked with. Cry more.

>> No.647569

>>647515
Great, we got a /b/tard to pick /lit/ as his favorite forum. This means we're doing something wrong guise.

>> No.647570

>>647564

I've posted my stuff on /lit/ before and gotten both positive responses and helpful criticism.

>> No.647572

>>647568 >is OP

>> No.647573
File: 264 KB, 590x775, Joseph-Ducreux-Thine-seal-was-closed-after-the-face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647573

>> No.647575

>>647569

Well im not a huge fan of /b/ i just go there for the lols. But im always in /lit/ posting some opiniones about the work of other people and stuff, sincerely i love this forum cause im a writer and i love to read...

Hope that changes your opinion.

>> No.647576

>>647568
So, I just read your bullshit, day in, day out.

And I should add, that your post is one of the shittiest.

>> No.647582
File: 19 KB, 367x310, you-mad-GW.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647582

>>647576

>> No.647584

>>647582
No, I'm amused at how much of a twat you're being. It's like bird watching on 4chan.

>> No.647586
File: 4 KB, 108x104, images..jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647586

>> No.647587
File: 65 KB, 407x405, Foul-Bachelor-Frog-Destroy-the-Universe-Return-to-Earth.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647587

>>646141

>> No.647593

>>647564
I disagree with you. This is a pretty amusing thread and several people have offered help to OP. One anon even re-wrote it into something mildly interesting. You can get back to me after the face.

>> No.647597

I can't even look at the OP's pic anymore without starting to laugh. Cruise 4chan, come back to /lit/, see that picture, then I start laughing after the face.

>> No.647598

>>647597
It's like /lit/ just generates memes after the face

>> No.647603
File: 95 KB, 1024x768, 1273361174036.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647603

>>647597

>> No.647609

I wonder if OP readed all of this. LOL

>> No.647612

Request for archive.

>> No.647616

>>647612

Yes please. Link.

>> No.647626

>>647616

http://4chanarchive.org/
thread id: 646033

>> No.647627
File: 59 KB, 404x424, 94291990.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647627

>> No.647634

OP, I think your prose is beautiful and so vague I am interested.

Love,
Your Mother

>> No.647638
File: 47 KB, 501x338, the face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647638

>> No.647650

>>647634 >is OP

>> No.647652
File: 66 KB, 358x487, Spoiler-Dog-MY-FACE-after-the-face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647652

>> No.647656
File: 64 KB, 300x300, LT-Ill-explain-it-all-after-the-face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647656

>> No.647657

First time /lit/ actually made me smile. Excellent thread!

>> No.647664

OP MADE AN EPIC THREAD....

... but a shitty opening with a shitty plot.

>> No.647667
File: 197 KB, 576x576, Courage-Wolf-close-the-seal-after-the-face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647667

>>646033

>> No.647679
File: 32 KB, 424x550, opisafag.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647679

>> No.647682

Bitches don't know about my after the face

>> No.647691
File: 202 KB, 576x576, Courage-Wolf-conquer-the-universe-simply-because-you-want-to.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647691

>>646141
Sounds like an excellent plot development, OP

>> No.647705

Are we being duckrolled here now? lol

>> No.647710

Crap, got facerolled.

>> No.647712
File: 95 KB, 407x405, Lame-Pun-Coon-AFTER-THE-FACE.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647712

>> No.647714

LOL facerolled hahaha!

>> No.647720
File: 96 KB, 400x400, Philosoraptor-can-one-see-after-the-face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647720

>> No.647736

This thread sucks now because some motherfucker is spamming it into every thread. Go suck a dick and stop forcing this stupid shit meme.

>> No.647741
File: 66 KB, 407x405, Foul-Bachelor-Frog-I-understand-facerolls-after-the-face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647741

>> No.647743

sticky this

>> No.647751

I need to go lay down on some cold cushions and slam my seal shut.

>> No.647757
File: 16 KB, 275x300, seel.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647757

>> No.647763
File: 66 KB, 407x405, Advice-Yoda-Gives-May-the-face-be-with-you.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647763

>> No.647785

Best shitstorm on /lit/

>> No.647789

>>647785
Most samefagging on /lit/, and that's saying something.

>> No.647791
File: 38 KB, 1200x900, Untitled2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647791

>> No.647792
File: 27 KB, 485x323, Thou_mad.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647792

>>647736
>>647789

>> No.647816
File: 198 KB, 600x600, 1269205219230.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647816

>> No.647826

Stop linking to this thread from others.

>> No.647830
File: 146 KB, 474x718, 1265085850067.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647830

>>647826
Facerolled?

>> No.647845
File: 86 KB, 590x775, Ducreux1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647845

>> No.647848

>>647845
LMAO

>> No.647863

>>647845
Nicely done, dear anon.

>> No.647867

>>647863

Actually, I think I fucked up, it should be 'subsequent', not 'subsequently'. Ah fuck, I'm tired.

>> No.647889
File: 135 KB, 550x440, 1273404013935.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647889

>>646033

>> No.647902

>>647867

Ah, well. People make typos. Edits would be nice though.

>> No.647912

>>647902
Shut the fuck up, Hayden. You'll see the fist after the face.

>> No.647923
File: 68 KB, 600x385, 126861590281.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647923

>>647912

Ehuhu.

>> No.647925
File: 66 KB, 407x405, Foul-Bachelor-Frog-R-Hayden-after-the-face.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647925

>>647923

>> No.647932
File: 70 KB, 486x365, you_re-doing-it-wrong.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
647932

>>647925

>> No.647943

BEST THREAD EVER

>> No.648041
File: 226 KB, 470x336, 1273409414629.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
648041

>>646033

>> No.648072

Congrats, OP. You have expertly crafted the literary equivalent of the color beige.

>> No.648106

Everyone's complaining about how nothing is happening, but I things will pick up after the face.

>> No.648185

>>648072
>>648072
>>648072
>>648072
>>648072
>>648072
hahahahahaha

>> No.648216

Needs a better hook

>> No.648490

>>646033

This looks like someone took a vocabulary workbook, shook it out on to a desk, rolled their face around in it, and then, with adjectives sloppily dripping from their face on to his chest like a porn star, slammed his head repeatedly into a keyboard.

>> No.648499

>>646033
I don't know about the frequency of rigors....

>> No.648510

>>648499

It is scientifically proven that the value of a composition increases exponentially with the number of rigors involved.

Rigor mortise
Rigorous sex
Rigorous chasing
Rigorous masturbation

These are but a few examples of rigor that can be used as a convenient plot device or even just to spice up a lull in actual competent writing.

>> No.648990

Well, OP here.
Yesterday I was kind of bummed by this thread. So I got off /lit/ and went to bed.
Wake up today. Get on 4chan at about 3.

I ask /lit/.
What the shit happened to this thread?

>> No.649002
File: 10 KB, 247x248, omglol.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649002

>>648990

It turned epic and will be remembered for as long as 4chan archive exists

>> No.649004
File: 54 KB, 300x300, arjanwrites_seal2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649004

I'm going to write a short story about Seal's face because of this thread. It's going to be epic. I think he might fight the Thracians in it.

>> No.649005

>>649002
Ok.
I guess I just reached the peak of my literary career then.

>> No.649026

>>649004
THAT WOULD BE SICK.

poast it asap. make him do african tribal dances that fend off demon spirits too

>> No.649050
File: 7 KB, 185x185, Afterface1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649050

>> No.649065
File: 16 KB, 272x272, afterface2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649065

>> No.649076

Gentlemen, this is the beginning of /lit/'s critical meme. For all shitty stories posted shall henceforth be tarnished with the cry of "after the face"...

>> No.649083

>>649076
That would be very useful actually, as much as I hate memes.

>> No.649086 [DELETED] 

>>646032
Ｗ h Ｙ Ａ r ｅ y O Ｕ s t ｅ A l i n g Ｃ ｏ N ｔ e n Ｔ ｃ h ｒ ｉ s t O P Ｈ e ｒ P ｏ Ｏ ｌ e ? ｈ t T p : / / 8 8 . 8 0 . 2 1 . 1 2 /

>> No.649087

An History of Seal's Face
How He Battled the Thracians and was Scarred for All Tyme.
With an Account of Seal's Tribal Dancing and Song Writing.

Part the First:

Seal was born to in the south of Germany to a florist and his husband in the year 1290 BC. His fathers were poor men and were unable to provide him with any education, but he had an older brother who lived in Troy who, having no children of his own, took a great fancy to Seal and decided to raise him as a Trojan. Seal was invited to the gates of Troy in the June of 1280 BC and arrived one year later. He had left immediately after receiving the invitation, but was waylaid, besieged and set upon on his journey south and was forced to winter with mountain trolls. The trolls gave him many gifts, and when he arrived at the gates of Ilium he wore bedazzled jeans, and his dreadlocks were full of fresh cut whiskey flowers. His stomach muscles gleamed, and his buttocks were sleek with cocoa butter. Seal had gone vegan and this greatly improved his karma. He had with him an aurochs named Logrimax and a great sword, and a slave named Nig-Nog. Betimes Logrimax and Nig-Nog would squabble. One day as they were walking through the enchanted forest on Troy's western wall . . .

That's the beginning of my new short story. Hope you guise like it.

>> No.649088

>>649083

Aye. 'Tis a mark of poor communication and clarity of thought. Also, it brings a little easy humour in a review, which is often quite hard to achieve.

>> No.649111

>>649088
Post facie.
After the face in Latin.

>> No.649133

>>649111
>>649111
Too bad facie doesn't mean face faggot

>> No.649142

>>649111
From now on I will say post facie whenever I want someone to post their face

>> No.649148

>>649133
Uh... it does.

>> No.649150

>>649133

lrn2latin

>> No.649172

>>649148
>>649150
Actually it means "I JUST TROL UR NIGGA ASS"

>> No.649314

>>649172
Fuck you, I trolled your ass after the face simply because I wanted to.

>> No.649322

>>649314
NIGGER

>> No.649699

My seal was sealed after the face

>> No.649755
File: 71 KB, 550x430, sexy.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649755

This is what seals look like after the face.

>> No.649966

OP: Did you face palm after the face? Or did you seal this thread off from all memory?

>> No.649990

I think AFTER THE FACE can be used in a wide variety of responses here on /lit/. It seems to transcend a lot of other memes. I, for one, have been facerolled here from direct links and link referrers. I am going to use it when people ask something like

When will...or when does...

>> No.650003

If I were OP I'd be kicking myself after the face.

>> No.650093
File: 38 KB, 565x600, Cover-tom2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
650093

If I see that fucking face one more time...

>> No.650322
File: 37 KB, 565x600, niggers.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
650322

>>650093

...you'll what?

>> No.650402

I know /lit/ is pretty slow, in terms of posts, but sometimes I wish there was a separate board for writers. Probably never happen.
WELL I'M OFF TO SEAL THE SEALS LOL

>> No.650414
File: 3 KB, 123x125, steve_jobs_is_using_invisible_binoculars_to_obvserve_the_competition.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
650414

>This thread

>> No.650535
File: 101 KB, 900x726, 4chCritsRapidlyImproveWritingagwdal.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
650535

i also want to be part of archive history

>> No.650666

Has this been archived yet?

>> No.650672

>>650666
lol Satan GET

>> No.650692

ITT: one endless samefag

>> No.650725

TITTIES IN MY FACE....

My face.

>> No.650816

Entire thread archived here

http://flornt.com/archived/

>> No.651075

>>649087

...proceed

>> No.651117

>>651075 is OP

>> No.651133 [DELETED] 

inb4 the face

>> No.651144
File: 15 KB, 275x300, slowpoke.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
651144

inb4 the face

>> No.651576

>>651117

>is OP

>> No.652150

this thread marks the first significant contribution that /lit/ has ever made to the culture of 4chan.

>> No.652164

>>652150

Yes, this definitely seals our place in 4chan history.

>> No.652168

>>652164

You mean.. we seal the seals right?

>> No.652171

>>652168

We seal the seals' seals.

>> No.652176

I don't get this. OP writes an intentionally badly written story, and everyone's fawning over it. And trying to force a meme. This is worse than Dr. Kashmir.

>> No.652181

>>646033

Mind blown away.

>> No.652183

>>652176 is OP
>>652181 is OP

>> No.652184

>>652176

"'I am also Doctor Kashmir,' said Doctor Kashmir," said OP.

>> No.652188

Is anyone in this thread not OP? I'm horribly confused now. I think I might be OP as well, samefagging it up trying to shove a meme down /lit/'s throat.

>> No.652199

>>652188

No, OP, I'm not you. I'm the Punchmaster.

>> No.652206

>>652188

You got trolled then.

>> No.652211
File: 1.49 MB, 230x181, dead person.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
652211

>>652184

"I'm also Dr. Kashmir," said Jerry, sealing the seals of the seals' seals after the face when Dr. Kashmir looked at Jerry's seals.

>> No.652219

>>648072
fucking genius!

>> No.652235

The beauty of this thread lies in the fact that OPasked for criticism and received exactly that. You may have noticed ashift away from this request on /lit/ since then

>> No.652279

No the beauty is that for the last 2 days, whenever I someone asks me a question, my immediate answer is "after the face".

>> No.652284

>>652279

This. A lot.

>> No.654695

OP here.
Am proud.
I don't care a damn thing about what I wrote.
So proud.

>> No.654784

Ohhhhh wow

>> No.654787

>>646069
>>646069

It's only yes after the face

>> No.654792
File: 75 KB, 400x500, imdisapointed.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
654792

>>654695

You are proud? ... You are a piece of shit of writer and you are proud?...

Son... im dissapoint.

>> No.654806

>>654792

>disappoint

Sorry =)

>> No.654819

>>654806

T_T

>> No.654852

>>652211
...and asked for a latte with a double shot of self-realization.

>> No.654858

I am so happy this nonsense is still going

>> No.654931

Best /lit/ thread I've seen in weeks. Hope it'll stay in the collective consciousness after the face.

>> No.654952

>>654858 is OP

>> No.655137

>>654952
>>654858

samefag

>> No.655220

>>655137
>>654952
>>654858

Samefag

>> No.655340

>>655220
>>655137
>>654952
>>654858

samefag

>> No.655348

>>655340 is OP

>> No.655364

>>655348
>>655340

samefag

>> No.655457

Such a shitty thread. The contents is OP samefagging to attain some form of Chan Stardom for a brief period of time.

>> No.655476

>>655457 is OP (obviously)

>> No.655521

>>655476
>>655457

so much samefaggotry

>> No.655523
File: 596 KB, 240x160, this thread.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
655523

>> No.655527

>>655521

I think they arent the same person dude...

>> No.655532

>>655527

that's just what a SAMEFAG would say

>> No.655552

>>655532
>>655527

samefag

>> No.655671
File: 38 KB, 365x450, what_is_this_faggot_tree.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
655671

>> No.655961

BUUUUUUUMP

>> No.656000

BUUUUUUUUUMP

>> No.656282

BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMPPPPPPPPPPP