/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.6093580]

He did nothing wrong.

[Anonymous No.6093798]

He hath left his oven on

[Anonymous No.6093832]

>>6093580
>Trust me.

[Anonymous No.6093852]

I guess it's because its fanfiction but I had to wonder how and why Angels had weapons/shields and how and why God would make Satan if he knew he was going to be a prideful prick

[Anonymous No.6093893]

[Anonymous No.6093903]

what are you supposed to do when your all-powerful creator suggests you play cops and robbers, and of course God gets to be the cop? tell him to grow up? last person to tell god that was Asherah, and look at what happened to her.

[Anonymous No.6093915]

>>6093893
Can someone post the greentext? That shit was legitimately fucking funny

[Anonymous No.6093976]

>>6093580
Those are some neat wings.

[Anonymous No.6094000]

>>6093852
It was all part of a an overly convoluted scheme to pick on mankind, so he looks better.

Essentially, I think it was an allegory for Milton's daddy issues.

[Anonymous No.6094001]

>>6093976

[Anonymous No.6094015]

>>6093903
>last person to tell god that was Asherah, and look at what happened to her.
Is that like how Lilith was Adam's first wife but got the cut because she wasn't a slave made out of his rib?

[Anonymous No.6094132]

>>6093915
>>6093893

>be andrew marvell
>have written some very good, dark poems about a figure called "the mower"
>be good friends with milton, whom i consider an absolute bawler, a primo poet
>letter arrives from him one day
>nearly unreadable
>looks like it was written by john donne's retarded offspring
>decipher "hi marvell, come over to my house"
>the rest is just random references to scripture
>go to milton's crib
>nigga turned blind
>sblood.flaxscroll
>he asks me to help him get his new work down
>epic long poem about the fall of man
>why-was-i-not-so-divinely-inspired.faircopy
>agree to help
>much excitement ensues
>get out quill and ink, only the most finely crafted paper
>here we go
>my genius friend begins his epic
>"the title... paradife loft"
>look at him
>his blind eyes going all over the place
>my year long friend has clearly lost his mind
>mfw this is gonna be a 10.000 line epic about a loft
>mfw the main character's name is retarded
>fatan

[Anonymous No.6094150]

>>6093580
Get behind me satan

[Anonymous No.6094168]

>>6094132

[Anonymous No.6094175]

>>6094132

[Anonymous No.6094201]

>>6094132

[Anonymous No.6094202]

>>6093580
the perception of satan as anti-hero rather than outright villain is directly responsible for the degeneration of western civ. milton was acting in satan's name to undermine the papacy and bring about an era of darkness

[Anonymous No.6094246]

>>6093580
Literally who?

[Anonymous No.6094304]

>>6094132
Fucking glorious, thank you. I had actually forgotten about that last line

[Anonymous No.6094317]

Religion is worth it for Moby-dick, Divine Comedy, and Paradise Lost alone. I would trade the life of every person who has died apparently for religion again and again just for those three works.

[Anonymous No.6094369]

>be inna forest
>weird bipedal monkey things are running around
>spy on them a bit and see what Yahweh is up to this time
>they seem a bit like angels, but dumber
>they don't do shit really, just frolic around
>investigate further
>find a tree
>the fruit look to be some kind of key to unlock greater power, detected a large amount of essence coming from them
>clearly they are supposed to do something with the tree, no other reason for it to be there
>find woman lady
>8/10 nice ass
>tell her about tree
>she says Yahweh said not to eat it or they'll die or something
>looks very scared
>tell her she'll be fine it's just a fucking fruit tree
>they finally eat it
>they put clothes on and go back to frolicking
>well that was pointless
>hear Yahweh yelling at them in the distance
>kicks them out of the forest
>follow and see where they go
>yada yada yada
>after some time discover Yahweh has cooked up some really weird propaganda about how he's some omnipotent being or something
>they think the natural cycle of destruction and rebirth of universes is some kind of good/evil paradigm judgement type deal
>spend a bunch of time trying to convince these people otherwise
>some listen but it's a futile effort and it doesn't matter anyways
>realize Yahweh made them poorly, as always, and they are naturally evil without my help
>realize bipedals are making propaganda without Yahwehs help
>mfw
>continually astounded at Yahweh's poor craftmenship
>chill and wait for them to destroy themselves

[Anonymous No.6094390]

>>6093580
He rebelled out of jealousy, not some kind of righteous opposition to authority.
>>6093852
Satan and his horde literally used industrial revolution levels of machinery in their fight.

[Anonymous No.6094438]

>>6094369
come back we need you