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/lit/ - Literature

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5805724 No.5805724 [Reply] [Original]

I'm no aspiring writer or anything, I'm just looking for somewhere for people like you to criticize my work. It's CIA fanfiction, so don't expect anything great. Just tell me what you think. I wrote it pretty quickly so it seems jumbled and messy.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10815441/1/CIA-Rise

P.S. I wasn't sure where to post this.

>> No.5805732

>being a fan of the CIA

kek

>> No.5805759

>>5805724
If it seems jumbled and messy to YOU, the author... What do you think we are going to make of it. Haven't you already pointed out one humongous flaw - that it's jumbled and messy - and shouldn't you rectify that before presenting it to others?

>> No.5805769

Sort of funny in concept but I didn't laugh once.

>> No.5805906

>>5805759
Just read it and give me your consensus. Don't take mine into account.

>> No.5805934

>>5805724
the writing is decent but it's not funny, if that's what you were going for.

Also, you need to open with something interesting. At least give us a hint of intrigue or some reason to care about CIA guy. Or make it funny. That would work too.

Oh yeah and I was mildly amused at the "bigger guy" part

>> No.5806023

>>5805934
It's not meant to be funny. It's meant to be serious. Also, the "caring" part is that he has a family and when we see what happens to him we feel sorry for his loved ones.

>> No.5806029

>>5805724
>CIA
>FanFic

....dropped