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/lit/ - Literature

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5410989 No.5410989 [Reply] [Original]

If you could read a dialogue between Socrates and any philosopher from history, who would it be and what do you think would be the result?

>> No.5411001

diogenes

something tells me it would look like this
https://en.wikisource.org/wiki/Imaginary_Conversations_of_Greeks_and_Romans/Diogenes_and_Plato

>> No.5411330

>>5410989
Russell Brand.

>> No.5411336
File: 41 KB, 640x473, crosssthestreams.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5411336

Socrates

>> No.5411340

Cleverbot

>> No.5411346
File: 27 KB, 800x521, Scanners_exploding_head.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5411346

>>5411336

>> No.5411348

>>5410989
Nietzsche. Socrates would easily destroy his unstructured thinking.

>> No.5411563

>>5411348
Nietzsche would destroy Socrates' structure.

>> No.5411570

>>5411563
Socrates is like water. He has no structure. He is an agent of chaos.

>> No.5411622

>>5410989
Hegel.
Reality itself would dissolve as the Weltgeist becomes absolute a few sentence into their exchange, and continues to encompass the universe at the speed of light.

>> No.5411626

Alfred North Whitehead

>> No.5411643

>>5411570
Nietzsche is like fire. He also has no structure. He is an agent of power.
Looks though for Nietzsche, he's surrounded by rivers of Socrates' influence. Will he be able to evaporate all water, turning past ideas into mere vapor? Find out after the break (of about 5 centuries into the future).

>> No.5411663

>>5411643
Or will the watery wisdom of the ancients douse his flame?

>> No.5411704

>>5411643
No. Don't propose they make a philosophy based deadliest warrior. It would suck as much as the original.

>> No.5411761

>>5410989

Because Socrates is purely a reactionary thinker, one who takes the words of others and meddles with them enough until he's arrived at some sort of structure of truth, it would be the most interesting to pair him with someone exceedingly radical to see how he would deal with their futuristic philosophy. Someone already mentioned Nietzsche, and that's a good one. But I would love to see Socrates versus Hegel. To see Hegel try to explain his theory of phenomenology and the spirit would be uproariously entertaining, however here I'm assuming that Socrates is the quintessential authority on truth, a mirror that can only reflect veritable facts, if you will. Though here I'm probably giving him too much credit. At first I thought that Socrates and Wittgenstein would provide an intriguing conversation, but I think they wouldn't really disagree about anything after Wittgenstein explained his philosophy, thus ending the conversation.

>> No.5411777

>>5411761
SOCRATES AND WITTGENSTEIN
Socrates -- What is justice?
Wittgenstein -- Fucked if I know.

>> No.5411820

>>5411777
Yeah, and then Socrates says: "Justice is this, this, and this". Seems untypical, but this would at least force Wittgie to reply that Socrates can't really say anything about justice, so they would start talking about language, which is a subject Socrates (i.e. Plato) didn't really think about on such level. The dialogue would be one big confusion of talking past each other, and it would probably end after about 5 hours when Wittgie decides to just beat the shit out of the old man because he's had enough of it.

>> No.5411831

>>5411820
>wittgie beating the shit out of plato

>> No.5411840

Socrates and Hegel

Socrates ends up converting to Christianity before the birth of Christ occurs and conceding that his mastery of the individual dialectical method is nothing compared to Hegel's mastery of the historical dialectic.

>> No.5411854

>>5411831
>bravest warrior

>> No.5411863

>>5411831
>that other anon doesn't know how ripped plato was

>> No.5411866

>>5411831
What you can't beat the shit out of, you must resent in silence.

>> No.5411876

>>5411863
I know, Plato was a wrestler. But not Socrates though. You see, Plato only gives voice to Socrates, but it is still Socrates' own body that appears in dialogues.

>> No.5411879 [DELETED] 

>>5411854
THere's no way Wittie could beat the shit out of Plato. Plato would wrestle him to the ground and then turn him into an eromenos until he learned how to actually do philosophy like someone who wasn't an autist.

>> No.5411932

>>5411820
>"Justice is this, this, and this".
>and so on and so forth

>> No.5412104
File: 91 KB, 474x528, 1406769685986.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412104

>Having a conversation with someone who never existed

>> No.5412223

Honestly? Late period Plato.

>But... but I thought you would have agreed with all the ideas I came up with! That's why I put them in your mouth!

Socrates would wreck late-period Plato

>> No.5412263

>>5411761
Stirner

>> No.5412266
File: 68 KB, 495x593, david_-_the_death_of_socrates.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412266

>>5411876
I dunno, Socrates was a soldier in ancient greece so he probably had some kind of hand to hand combat training. Plus, look at those guns

>> No.5412276

>>5412263
I think they would get along very well

>> No.5412280

>>5412276
Not really. Let them talk about ethics and they would get into a fight after the first sentence has been uttered.

>> No.5412289
File: 32 KB, 200x284, 1391841133748.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412289

>>5412266
yummy

>> No.5412293

>>5412266
He looks wimpy there m8, no bulk at all

>> No.5412311

>>5412104
Bait?

>> No.5412313

>>5412311
Are you asking for it?

>> No.5412315

>>5412266
Some sort of training? He was a hoplite who fought on the frontlines in several wars. He spent three hours minimum everyday in the gym bulking up.

>> No.5412329
File: 31 KB, 630x420, wanna fight.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412329

>>5412293

>> No.5412345
File: 317 KB, 311x615, zyzzek.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412345

Zizek

>> No.5412351
File: 394 KB, 940x940, socrates.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412351

>>5412266
These paintings are obvious idolizations of Greek philosophers. Pic is a more truthful representation. (Some have theorized that his eyes caused him to think dialectically.)

>> No.5412354

>>5412266
mirin' dem abs

>> No.5412363

>>5412345
Too easy, Socrates would just say:
>Can you expand on that "so on and so on"?

>> No.5412371

>>5412363
>Shure Socrates, you'll se the PUYHREE EEDEEOLOGEE of communism *sniff* has it base in...and so on and so on

>> No.5412380

>>5412266
Socrates was not only ripped, he was FUCKING ripped. Pretty much every Greek philosopher, poet, tragedian, and so on would have been, because they were all adult male citizens, and either had to fight in the army or (later) row in the fleet. Or both.

People underestimate the level of physical exertion these things required. These guys worked out EVERY day. They worked out so much that they actually liked working out. They lived to work out. Their entire leisure time was composed of working out and getting gay over how hot their bods were in the balmy Mediterranean sun. The first ten fucking pages in Plato's FIRST dialogue have Socrates lusting over a teenager's sweaty, manly pecs through his toga. Socrates likens himself to a lion that is about to gobble up its prey. He can barely control himself. That is how the Western philosophical tradition starts: homoerotic lust for ripped abs. When Alcibiades, the manliest man in history, bursts into the famous drinking party, at which the guests are discussing the urbane topic of Love, it is to ask Socrates why he never fucked him in the ass when they cuddled. You know how the dialogue ends? Socrates goes to the gym and works out.

Modern recreations and reconstructions have not even succeeded in duplicating the physical feats reported of the Athenian soldiery - that is, the Athenian citizenry. Often, modern historians doubt that these feats are even being accurately reported, for instance the straight dash of the Athenian army across the entire field at Marathon. This is because modern athletes and bodybuilders can't even do these things, even with relatively light gear compared to what the Athenians actually carried. It took a team of Olympic master rowers to even APPROXIMATE the sailing techniques of the Athenian fleet, outside of combat conditions, on a placid sea. The entire Athenian fleet was regularly capable of these maneuvers, season after season, year after year, campaign after campaign. The sole engine of these maneuvers was muscle. Raw, sweaty, heaving Athenian muscle. Athenian men were the envy of the Aegean.

It is understandable that modern historians, coming from a society of flabby, skinnyfat wimps, are unable to comprehend the sheer manliness of Athens. Socrates saved Alciabiades in a hoplite battle in the Peloponnesian War. Aeschylus, the tragic poet, fought at Marathon. And all of them worked out and fucked ass, at every moment they weren't literally inventing Western civilisation.

>> No.5412383

>>5412380
I didn't know /fit/ browses /lit/.

>> No.5412391

>>5412380
>he doesn't actually like working out
what a faggot

>> No.5412395

>>5412380
wat

>> No.5412398

>>5412380
10/10 post

>> No.5412403

This thread was doomed to devolve to "lol my philosopher could beat your philosopher in a fight"

>> No.5412411

>>5412403
Thanks /fit/

>> No.5412414

>>5412380
ancient greece confirmed for the physical manifestation of /fit/
IE gay as fuck

>> No.5412420

>>5412380
They were gay bruh

>> No.5412430

>>5412420
more powerful than your het ass
they made their living an art

>> No.5412437

Diogenes.

Already mentioned, but adding my vote.

>> No.5412472

>>5412430
sure fag

>> No.5412482

>>5412437
diogenes with any major historical figure really

dude is just incapable of giving fucks. total badass and/or deranged homeless man

>> No.5412489

>>5412430
reminder that greeks would've never subscribed to faggoty cis-gendered het/homo dichotomy subhumanism

>> No.5412521

>>5412489
Exactly. Any bodily pleasure was on the same level as long as it didn't lower their feeling of power.

>> No.5412538

This thread is really turning me on

>> No.5412580

>>5412414
>>5412420
>>5412472

Nothing's more masculine and manly than pounding another dudes ass-meat. I mean, women are delicate, soft little creatures, anybody could "make love" to a woman. It's easy. You just slip your slick dick into a slick slit and poof, you've gotten laid. The meatpie's too supple in women. But with men? It takes real physical prowess, exertion, to dominate another man's ass, make it beg for more, to FUCK him. It's a shame really that masculinity isn't seen the same way as it once was...sigh, it's making me think you're all a bunch of projecting queers.

>> No.5412619 [SPOILER] 
File: 1.07 MB, 1400x1277, 1410317238483.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412619

>>5412489
to live in a time to be free

>> No.5412632

>>5412619
sauce?

>> No.5412686

>>5412383
I'm always shocked by the places /fit/ and /k/ turn up.

Having a nice quiet thread on /co/, about some character shooting a bunch of guys, and all of a sudden "There's no way that he'd be able to hit... the muzzle velocity of the p57 luger would only allow for a..." and on and on. And you look it up, and it's completely right.

>> No.5412691

>>5412580

LOL

>> No.5412697

>>5410989
A match between Socrates and any of the modern philosophers would be entertaining to me.

They are extremely at odds with each other so I suppose that would be the most fruitful of debates.

>> No.5412708
File: 993 KB, 1400x1272, lol censor.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5412708

>>5412686
Because /k/ is ingrained in a big part of the us as part of life, for some people it's as compatible with everything as /lgbt/ for others.
/fit/ I believe it's a different thing, because many people flock to that board after lurking for a while and convincing themselves the physical betterment will affect other aspects of their lives. I'm not saying it won't, but some people want to fix problems with clear solutions through pumping themselves up.

>>5412632
I don't know, just lurk gelbooru with the most probable search words.

>> No.5412757

Socrates and Derrida.
Derrida would deconstruct Socrates's questions, in this way turning all Socrates' questions into assertions of some philosophical prejudice. The roles would be switched.

>> No.5412799

>>5412580

This guy gets it.

>> No.5412885

>>5412580
Is there any evidence of prolapsed anuses in Ancient Greece?

>> No.5412893

>>5412885
They probably though it was a more or less normal thing among men so they didn't register it.

>> No.5412930

>>5412619
>>5412632
>>5412708
>inb4 ban
http://tbib.org/index.php?page=post&s=list&tags=joel_jurion

>> No.5412974

>>5412930
There's no sexual content in those pictures, I made sure to subtly censor any delicate area.

>> No.5412986

>>5412974
damn didnt even notice

>> No.5412993

>>5411001
>ancient greeks speaking like victorian toffs. no

>> No.5412997

>>5412986
I'm just that much of a pro

>> No.5413000

>>5410989

Marquis de Sade

They end up fucking each other

>> No.5414491

>>5412380
This is why i come to /lit/

>> No.5414575 [DELETED] 

->CELEB NUDES pics + videos get them before it get removed : http://imgur.com/WzqgHVt

>> No.5414747

In terms of being amusing there's many.
But in terms of the betterment of society I would like to see him destroy the old fraud Hegel's foundations and by extension his disciples.

>> No.5415066

>>5412345
>not writing zyzzek
Plzzek diezek

>> No.5415074

>>5412580
I watch gay porn solely for this.
Im not gay 2. Srs

>> No.5415077

>>5412380
Please post in every thread

>> No.5415159
File: 21 KB, 330x357, 1318119087001.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5415159

>>5410989
Lycurgus, the mythical founder of the Spartan state.

I want to read Socrates butt-frustration with Laconic speech.