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/lit/ - Literature

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4991065 No.4991065[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

Gloria Tesch is the world's youngest novelist and has written countless books, produced, starred and directed her own movies and is on route to become the next BIG THING in the publishing industry. She had written 8 novels by the age of fifteen. From her critically acclaimed Maradonia series to her now flourishing poetry career Gloria Tesch will be a name to remember for time to come.

"Dear World"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lAuUkpZOl4

Maradonia and the Seven Bridges Movie starring Darin Ferraro

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7dC7KqZ3Zm4

Maradonia book promotion

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIpFTCPGv3s

Maradonia book trailer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4OYYjXWCoI

Gloria Tesch radio interview

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lAunfi1yCU

>> No.4991070

>>4991065
So?

>> No.4991080

Gloria, is that you?

>> No.4991081

>>4991070
Find her books on amazon!

http://www.amazon.com/Gloria-Tesch/e/B008UANLJE

>> No.4991083

Does a certain rule pertain?

>> No.4991088

Would fuck, but would not read

>> No.4991092

I remember this.

>> No.4991097

It doesn't count when it's a jew because of the community/media connections you dumb dummy.

>> No.4991107
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4991107

>> No.4991116

Advertising is against the rules.

Also, no wikipedia page. Might as well be anon.

>> No.4991117
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4991117

>>4991097
b-but she talks about Jesus

>> No.4991120

http://www.newyorker.com/arts/critics/atlarge/2011/12/05/111205crat_atlarge_gopnik?currentPage=1

http://www.newyorker.com/arts/critics/atlarge/2010/06/14/100614crat_atlarge_miller?currentPage=1

Couple relevant New Yorker articles--primarily on YA fiction and its allure, if anyone is interested.

>> No.4991123

>>4991107
Definitely one of her latest

>> No.4991124

>>4991117
>Gloria
>Tesch
>Not a jewess

Okay. I like the reptilian on that book cover, nice touch.

>> No.4991195
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4991195

The reviews are COMEDY GOLD.

I vote for her as the new queen of /lit/.

>> No.4991204

>>4991195

/lit/ doesn't have a queen we have sophisticated, decentralized hellenic-style platonic male loves

>> No.4991241

>>4991065
how young is she?
legally young i hope

also LOL
http://www.amazon.com/Maradonia-Seven-Bridges-Saga-Book-ebook/dp/B0089DQE14/ref=la_B008UANLJE_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1402336849&sr=1-1

fucking 2 stars on amazon
i'm FAIRLY certain even something i would write would get at least 3 easy

>> No.4991321

Leah Dallaire says:
"Don't judge this young writer's work on her fledgling freshman effort. When she's on the best seller list, I'm sure she'll have the last laugh. And that rough, unedited first-run edition of Maradonia will probably go for thousands on eBay. Think about THAT while your posting away on Amazon all by yourself in the middle of the night.
And by the way, SableSeal, I see that "Lolita" is on your wish list. Disturbing."

My fucking sides.

>> No.4991327

>>4991241
It's not really even 2 stars, all the 5 star reviews are jokes.

>> No.4991339

Proof that "fake it until you make it" is awful advice.

>> No.4991346

>>4991339
It's fine if your dishonesty is convincing.

>> No.4991392

I'm pretty sure someone could count the number of books she's written

>> No.4991440

Some French 12-yo (or something) wrote a novel about 20 years ago. For some reason I remember that it was called Les Gnomisnakars.

>> No.4991916

>>4991065
Is this report-worthy? I can't decide, I've never done that before.

>> No.4992439

I want to read her books so badly.

>> No.4992449
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4992449

Viral marketing some religious hispanic anti-consumerist ghetto girl wannabe on /lit/...

>> No.4992454

>>4992449
this
dude no one gives a shit we are all about dfw over here

>> No.4992455

>>4992454
You gotta give it up to DFW, he's pretty hung.

>> No.4992480

>>4992454
>we are all about dfw over here
Don't speak on behalf of me. DFW will not be missed by anyone as soon as professors stop bringing him up in contemporary american lit lectures.

>> No.4992492

>her

stopped reading right there

>> No.4992621

I wrote a bunch of novels as an adolescent/teenager, too. But Jesus Christ, I didn't PUBLISH THEM! They're garbage! What the hell does a teenager have to write about? I wouldn't inflict those "books" on my worst enemy.

>> No.4993785

Great character development, a unique writing style and a complex plot full of deep philosophical symbolism. I'll give her books a 10/10 rating.

>> No.4993818

tits/10

>> No.4993865

>>4992621
is this copypasta? it should be.

>> No.4993889

>>4991083
>Does a certain rule pertain?
The "no fun allowed"-rule? Here's a thread for you: >>4992509

>> No.4994871

>>4993889
Why is /lit/ opposed to fun?

>> No.4995012

>>4991065
>that pic
I came. Thanks, OP.

>> No.4996286

I would fuck this girl so hard.

>> No.4998153

>>4995012
Did you watch the videos?

>> No.4998374
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4998374

>>4991065
I wish I was one of those hentai monsters so I could fill her womb with my spooge until she bursts.

>> No.4999260

>>4998374
You don't need to be a hentai monster to do this.

>> No.4999285

So much sexual frustration on 4chan...

>> No.5000490

>>4999285
So much projection in your post.

>> No.5000507

Commercial spamming/advertising is unlawful and you can be put to death for it.

>> No.5000548

>>4991321
I have no words...I don't know what to say to that.

>> No.5001696

>>4996286
Before or after reading her boos?

>> No.5001698

>>5000490
>projecting your projection

>> No.5001699

>>5001698
>crapping your pants instead of getting up from your computer because you just CAN'T miss an opportunity to shitpost

>> No.5001721

So what are these books even about?

>> No.5001733

book trailers are ridiculous. why are these made?

>> No.5001758

>>4999260
No, dude, I want her to spray semen out of her after I take my dick out.
Men usually ejaculate 10cc at most and I'd need liters of the thing to do that.

>> No.5001762

>>5000507
>yfw you're executed for posting feet on a blue board
hammurabi pls

>> No.5001787

>>5001758
Masturbate. Collect the spunk in some recipient/s. Repeat until you have the desired quantity. Get a hose. Acquire target.

>> No.5001800

>>4996286
at full force in the mouth, vagina, and ass

>> No.5001834

>>5001787
What about collecting the spunk of a bunch of guys and then shoot the hose inside of her?

>inb4 contraceptive pill
Like I'd let her!

>> No.5003056

>>5001800
At the same time?