/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.454913]

A somewhat-friend of mine seems to think that she's actually a good author. She's currently working on a "book" called Finally. She always uses an alias online-- Emily Ann Marie Faith Benjamin. Apparently, she's planning to change her name to it later on.

Anyways, she's created a small site and posted both the prologue and the first chapter of her shitty story. She has a tenuous grasp of the English language, but it seems that she doesn't actually know how to write good fiction. The bitch actually managed to work most of her friends into the story, including myself. I told her repeatedly to not include me, but she really doesn't listen. My name IRL is Jake, so she put me in as "Jake Xavier". She's the kind of person who enjoyed the Twilight series, and believes that her entire life is shit, even though she's spoiled. She's obsessed with a guy named David. He's a nice guy, and we share some mutual friends, but she can't shut up about him. From what I've heard, her mom is also a strict Christian. The girl just pisses me off. I can't be a dick, though, since she's friends with my girlfriend.

Here's what has been published so far.

http://finallyeamfb.webs.com/

If you can read through the whole thing without vomiting, I salute you. Good luck.

EDIT: She's actually using the webs.com site as both a blog and hosting for her story. Read the posts first, then read the story-- the link is in the sidebar to the left.

[Anonymous No.454915]

>>454913
also, heres the "sneak peak" of her novel.

http://finallyeamfb.webs.com/finallybyeamfb.htm

[Anonymous No.454927]

It needs more commas.

[Hannah !dAkOtAXZ3M No.454929]

>I paused in the doorway for a moment, half because I wanted to reminiscence in the old but familiar smell of the place, other half because I didn’t want to look to my left toward our booth.

[Anonymous No.454939]

>EDIT: She's actually using the webs.com site as both a blog and hosting for her story. Read the posts first, then read the story-- the link is in the sidebar to the left.
edits, on mah 4chan?

also, sage.

[Anonymous No.454943]

>Erik was my only crush this school year so far. It was only October but I didn’t care. I had known Erik since I was a kid, since the day I was born. We were born on the same day and our mom’s were close.
>mom's

[Anonymous No.454945]

>>454939
it was more of a P.S.

[Anonymous No.454953]

>Jack Xavier

[Anonymous No.454957]

Oops. I meant Jake Xavier.

[Anonymous No.454959]

I find this story quite intellectually elucidating. I have not finished yet, but I have enjoyed what I've read so far. Her word choice, while conservative, is terse and cogent, as reminiscent of Hemingway and Camus. I am impressed at how well she adumbrates the personalities and convictions of all her characters, from mere caricatures into felsh-and-blood people that the reader can empathize with.

>Well thanks bell, good to see you too after all these years.

The bell is clearly a metaphor for the struggle against the patriarchal hierarchy imposed upon us by the military-industrial complex. What do my fellow e/lit/ists think?

[Anonymous No.454963]

>I needed to talk to him about what happened five years ago when we were seventeen. I was writing a book on it. I can’t write a very good book without having at least two bastards in it…he was the second.

Is this a troll?

[Anonymous No.454964]

>>454959
>felsh-and-blood

[Anonymous No.454975]

>>454964
I know, the hyphens were unnecessary

http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/138700.html..

[Anonymous No.454983]

>"Novel" written in the first-person present tense.
>Sage

[Anonymous No.454984]

>>454975
>felsh-and-blood

[Anonymous No.454986]

>>454929

Oh.

Oh my.

[Anonymous No.454989]

>>454913
WE ARE NOT YOUR PERSONAL ARMY, YOU MOTHERFUCKING FUCK.

[Anonymous No.454998]

>>454983

Are you serious?

[Anonymous No.455011]

>>454989
I'm not asking you to do anything, just read it and weep.

[Anonymous No.455023]

>except that it contains six characters named and modeled after their models.
>characters named and modeled after their models.
>modeled after their models.

wha

[Anonymous No.455025]

>i fixed it...
>david and i fixed it.


>im acually fine now.


>[:)]
>i hope no one hates me when ppl find out....................
>oh god......


>rachel will kill me...........
....................................LOL....................................................

[Anonymous No.455035]

>>david joe and scott are all best friends.

david dated ashley

ashley loves david

joe has a crush on ashley

after david broke up with ashley he and i dated

now he broke up with me and i still love him

all the while

scott started liking alinah

but scott dated amber

amber loves scott

scott broke up with amber

and now its awkward between amber and scott

and scott and alinah are friends

jacob R is dating Sarah H.

Sara H is a friend from elem school

SARAH with an H on the End is dating Mitch

Mitch is friends with Jacob R, Me and Jon.

Jon is dating Christine D

christine is friends with SARAH and Lori E

Lori and Christine consider David to be their older brother

Lori and i used to be BEST FRIENDS

then earlier this year sh e stopped talking to me

so now when david is in port huron he can never be with me and lori at the same time

i still consider lori a friend

christine is now a good friend.

and christine knows matt

who like two others saved my life.

Matt is dating Ryan

Ryan i hardly know

but that is all the realtionships going on that i can possibly think of
if i missed any message me. i'll fix it.
oh god.....i can't breathe lolololol

[Anonymous No.455037]

good for a quick laugh.
she might kill herself when she finds out the truth

[Anonymous No.455033]

>>454984
OH FUCK.

I just realized. Holy shit.

[Anonymous No.455045]

i might start writing a second novel. it will be called "love...the slowest form of suicide" appropriate enough for the story line. the P.O.V. will be shared between the two characters.

I cannot wait until this gets out, It sounds so... true. Art in it's most distilled form.

[Anonymous No.455048]

>includes "relationships" section in blogololol
>includes a fuckload of real relationships, quite possibly longer than her novel

I don't get it

[Anonymous No.455058]

>Yes Ebony! It is Circle time. Everybody get in a circle and hold hands right over left.” The same way she did yesterday and the day before. I went over to Miss Pearl and took her hand and then Erik took mine. Suddenly I got a heat wave. My arms tensed up and my diaphragm constricted. Erik looked over with that concerned look on his face. Before he could say anything Miss Pearl started to talk, “you guys are amazing. I am so glad I got to teach you all that I have and that I have gotten to meet each and every one of your beautiful souls. You are all very important to me and to God. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Remember ‘you maybe just be someone in the world but to someone you might be the world’. Now who would like to say their favorite line?”

[Anonymous No.455066]

>>455058
>circle time
>brave new world circle sex ritual

crehehehehehehehhehehehehhehe

[Anonymous No.455077]

>jacob R is dating Sarah H.

>Sara H is a friend from elem school

>SARAH with an H on the End is dating Mitch

wait but you just said sarah with an h was dating jacob R. wow what a skank!

[Anonymous No.455093]

>He has always been an amazing friend to me. He has dark hair, white skin and occasionally he wore a black cowboy hat around. His twin brother was Jake Xavier Dicon. Jake was actually younger then Erik even though he acted like the older brother. Jake was born five minutes after Erik and barely crossed over to the next day. Jake usually goes by his middle name, Xavier, but I always call him Jake. I just think that name is more fitting then Xavier. There were only a few differences between the boys, but the differences made up who they were and separated them from one another completely. The differences all had to do with style. They liked different styles of music, clothing, living, different styles of girls. Most of the students in Hell High would make a clique out of these differences. Jake would be a Goth, Erik would be an Emo I would be a punk/rock and Salena would be only the Lord and Lady knows what. But we decided to stick together and make our own clique in it we also included a girl named Kali. I met her in Pre-school. A couple years ago she got a concussion and suffered memory loss and on the same trip lost her parents and sister. Or at least that is what we told everyone else. I am the only family she has left.

[Anonymous No.455102]

>>455093
>Hell High

the epitone of teenage angst.

[Anonymous No.455120]

>>455102
You just don't understand alright?

YOU'VE NEVER UNDERSTOOD ME!

[Anonymous No.455128]

>>454959
I think you're on to something here... the use of such an intense diction is blowing my mind. This women is the next Faulkner people I'm calling it now.

[Anonymous No.455135]

>>455035
HOLD THE MOTHER FUCKING PHONE

if alinah and scott wanna date, then who cares if scott dated amber? I mean they broke up. I don't see the big deal

[Anonymous No.455146]

I think she should get to know Ryan guys. I mean she HARDLY KNOWS HIM!

[Anonymous No.455154]

This thread sucks and you all should be ashamed to be participating in it. I'm ashamed to have to send this message. My eyes tear.

[Anonymous No.455167]

>>455146

but ryans dating matt

[Anonymous No.455213]

OH DEAR JESUS, WTF IS THIS?

[Anonymous No.455227]

>>455167
>>455146
its ok tho, in highschool if you're a female, having more gay friends is always better

[Anonymous No.455367]

>>455154

I like kitties.