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/lit/ - Literature

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4328667 No.4328667[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

I'm wondering about this. Or asking out a worker in general. But mostly bookstore. There's this girl who I've been (like a beta) pining over for about a year, who works at my local major bookstore. How do I ask her out, and A. get her to say yes, B. not make myself look stupid, and C. still be able to shop there, whatever she says? She's all girly girl, and fairly posh. And so, so pretty. ;_;

>> No.4328686
File: 113 KB, 1786x1030, peopleatpartypic.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4328686

See picture: this is the kind of thing, we DON'T want to happen.

It's a joke, nobody knows, they've got a ticket to the show.

>> No.4328702

>>4328686
Why are those bitches so ugly?

>> No.4328705

>>4328667
your first mistake is "pining" over a girl you haven't even fucked.

>> No.4328703

He licked his lips in anticipation, drug-fueled philosophical introspections of Tao Lin's Tai Pei (published 2013, suspenseful meditation on love, memory and life in urban America, crafted with fluid prose to perfection) still lingering in his mind. A brief glance in the mirror confirmed that his outfit was impeccable as always - fedora tilted at 5 degrees sharp, leather trenchcoat unbuttoned to reveal a Ron Paul tee shirt, fingerless gloves permitting no doubts about his fashion sense and general standing in life. She was seated in the corner of the establishment, seemingly immersed into a magazine but swift, shy glances she thieved from time to time left no doubt that she knew it very well - the Big Game was on and the hunter was closing on his victim already. He dog-eared his book, folding it under his arm and stood up, heading in her direction at a deliberate, carefully cultivated gait that was neither too slow, lest he was mistaken for a slacker, nor too fast, for rushing befits children and servants and certainly not well-cultured gentlemen such as his humble self. She clutched her magazine nervously, her face freezing in an instant. He passed by her table, stopped and turned around, his left eyebrow slightly arched to produce an expression halfway between amusement and astonishment, with a quick stop at anticipation.
"'mlady?" he tipped his fedora curtly. She looked at him, feigning surprise.
"Oh, hello, would you like to purchase that?" she responded. He stood silent for a moment, awaiting an invitation to join the maiden for lunch.
"It's a great bookstore, huh, I love the atmosphere." She was getting visibly uncomfortable.

>> No.4328714

>>4328702
The one on far left is cute.

>> No.4328717

But girls you haven't fucked or gone out with are the most obvious people to pine over.

.

>> No.4328730

Kill yourself.

>> No.4328731

>>4328717
if you're a child, sure. there are few things more pathetic than a grown man going around with a non-sexual fantasy about a person he doesn't even know because he was too afraid to talk to her.

>> No.4328745

>>4328667

People have asked me a lot lately what my favorite pick up line is. And I give them one that works every time, but they don't believe me:

"Do you like books?"

When they say yes, just take it from there. talk about authors, styles, genres, hell- cover art, even. It's a great subject to get the ball rolling. What you need to initially foster is a friendship of sorts, and this is a great place to start.

And if they say no that that question, kick them in the cunt for being a stupid bitch and walk off proud and euphoric.

>> No.4328747

>posh

Didn't know you were British sunhawk.

Where are you from?

>> No.4328753

are you an archaeologist?

works everytime, believe me.

>> No.4328761

>>4328753
>"No, what kind of question is that?"

>> No.4328769

>>4328667
I was asked out by a girl working at a bookstore when I checked out Lacan's XI seminar. She told me she studied psychology and left me her number if I felt talking about the book.

Well I think that in case buying lacan's books does not work your best bet is to buy something which is non-offensive and generally does a good impression (something like speak memory by nabokov or a saul bellow book) and then ask her for a suggestion so that you can inquire about her tastes.
Then buy the book and after a week (not more or she will forget you) come back and tell her what you think about the book (if it's some stupid book like the hunger games google some youtube reviews by some girls and then rehash their opinions).

Use the book coversation to get to know her, make a joke that she might like, make her ask and ask, casually but without hiding your romantic interest, if she'd like to grab something to drink sometime.

If she says yes you are done.
If she says she has a bf don't do the stupid thing of saying "ah no no, not a date, like friends, just to talk books". That's stupid and will hurt you, just move on and get an okcupid account or something.

>> No.4328800

>>4328769
>getting asked out by a person that reads Jacques "Pervert" Lacan
terrifying

>> No.4328809

>>4328702
White

>> No.4328818

you people really ought to work on developing your own methods/personalities and stop looking for answers/guides/formulas/infographs on the internet.

>> No.4328822

>>4328800
If you think that Lacan is a pervert you have probably never read him. He barely even talks about sex.

Want to know terrifying? Date a girl who reads judith butler and has a guro collection.

>> No.4328826

Hand her a note with this email address
johncommon@hush.com
I'll explain to her who you are and the great contributions you have made to our elite literature club over the years.

>> No.4328833

>>4328818
>developing your own methods/personalities

sounds like new-age bullshit

>> No.4328837

>>4328822
imo psychoanalysis always generates a perverted worldview.
Psychoanalysis is really just a macabre form of theology, with something like "the mind" or "the ego" in the place of God or divinity.

>> No.4328838

>>4328833
retard. it's literally telling you to go out and do stuff. experiment with real situations and adjust your behavior until you get what you want instead of using cookie cutter bullshit guides that don't take your personal experience into account.

>> No.4328840

>>4328837
>a macabre form of theology
just the way i like it

>> No.4328841

>>4328838
> it's literally telling you to go out and do stuff.

sounds more and more like new-age bullshit

>duuuude, you just gotta get out there and have experiences maaan, like far-out experiences duuuude. You have to expand your horizons maan, push your limits duuuuude. You heard of LSD?

>> No.4328842

>>4328837

I can tell you know a lot about psychoanalysis.

>> No.4328845

>>4328841

Why are you changing everything he's saying and adding things in in order to make it seem like you're not a retard?

>> No.4328848

>>4328841
holy shit what a retard

>> No.4328850

>>4328841
You should go take a peek at >>>/x/ Jung is a real deal magician over there.

>> No.4328852

>>4328845
"Go out and do stuff" does not constitute advice. When people use that phrase they usually mean shit like nightclubs, drugs and sex.

>> No.4328851

>>4328837
I don't think you have a real understanding of psychoanalysis.

First of the ego plays a really minimal role both in freudian and lacanian psychoanalysis.

Secondly the only metaphysical part you may encounter is in beyond the pleasure principle which basically deals with life itself (as the object of vitalistic philosophies) and not trying to explicate the mind.

I don't see how you can get to those conclusions.

>> No.4328855

>>4328842
I can tell you know a lot about telling what I can tell about psychoanalysis.

>> No.4328857

>>4328851
>Secondly the only metaphysical part you may encounter is in beyond the pleasure principle which basically deals with life itself (as the object of vitalistic philosophies) and not trying to explicate the mind.

All of psychoanalysis is metaphysical. The "psyche" itself is metaphysical. Psychotherapy resembles the sacrament of confession.

>> No.4328863

>>4328852
i mean literally go talk to the people you want to talk to and if you fail, figure out why you failed and adjust. aka what real people with lives do.

>> No.4328865

>>4328703
10/10

>> No.4328875

>>4328863
>i mean literally go talk to the people you want to talk to

this isn't my problem, my problem is not that I don't talk to people that I want to talk to (because I always talk to people that I want to talk to), it's that I want to talk to somebody but then when the time comes I change my mind and decide I don't want to talk to them

>and if you fail

what constitutes failure?

>figure out why you failed and adjust.

how do I figure out why I failed?
how do I adjust

>aka what real people with lives do.

thanks for saying that I don't have a life, that's really encouraging for somebody you're trying to give advice to

>> No.4328879

>>4328875
>thanks for saying that I don't have a life, that's really encouraging for somebody you're trying to give advice to
>implying you're genuinely discouraged and aren't being a little twat

>> No.4328882

>>4328879
>implying you're genuinely discouraged

more new-age mind reading bullshit

>> No.4328883

>>4328882
>hyphenating new age

>> No.4328885

>>4328875
It doesn't sound like you're the type of person who will ever get laid so you shouldn't worry too much about it.

>> No.4328890

>>4328885
how do you know I've never got laid? Did you use your magic new-age crystal ball?

>> No.4328894

>>4328883
>not hyphenating new-age

more new-age bullshit

>> No.4328896

>>4328890
Nah, just an educated guess based on your autistic posting style.

>> No.4328897

>>4328702
Britain

>> No.4328902

>>4328857
Not really.
The psyche is not metaphysical. It is at best psychological and secondarily Freud is a materialist, if you read the metapsychology you see he tries to reduce the first topic (conscious, preconscious and unconcious) by reducing it to the functionaing of different neurons.

The parallel with confession is not completely wrong, but it is far fetched. Foucault when stressing on it meant to underline how both psychoanalysis and catholicism use the duty of saying the truth as a way of control.

But if you had any experience in analysis and confession you would know that the two work in very different ways.

In confession for example there is no free association rule. You are doing an effort to keep your thoughts in line and you have a list of topics that you might address,
There are many other differences in how it is practiced, in its function, in its goals that I'm not going to list here just because I'm being lazy and this post is long enough.

>> No.4328908

>>4328896
It's OK, I don't want to "get laid" anyway, I've always found that kind of speech to be dehumanizing and barbaric as it reduces people's relations into a kind of predator-prey relationship.

>> No.4328911

>>4328902
>Freud is a materialist

materialists have their own theology, don't let them fool you.
many of them, for example, think that the "Atom" is the building-block of the Universe. Top lel.

>> No.4328912
File: 9 KB, 300x168, beast.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
4328912

>>4328908
>Not embracing the animal within

>> No.4328919

>>4328911
Yes but that's a far fetching. Saying that psychoanalysis is a reversed theology is different than saying that it has things to say in regard to theology (as in moses and monotheism) or that it has an underlying theological notion.

You are just muddling the waters I feel.

>> No.4328922

>>4328667
she has bigger arms than he does lol

>> No.4328923

>>4328912
You mean the best that is below.

>> No.4328932

>>4328667
>hey you look interesting/cute/fun/insert something complimentary here

>would you like to hang out sometime?

>if she says yes you acquire the digits and you're pretty much set

>if she says no: oh ok, nice talking to ya anyways, take care

tada

>> No.4329331

>>4328932

Ya keep it simple, don't do something lame. You're not a snowflake.

>> No.4329345

>>4328857
>Psychotherapy resembles the sacrament of confession.

Foucault fakes his own death so that he can anonymously post on /lit/ thirty years later.

>> No.4329350

>>4328932
Bingo. This poster is the only non autist present.

>> No.4329355

>>4329345
I would read that.

>> No.4329389

Lobby to legalize prostitution.

>> No.4329412

>>4328897

British slags don't drink out of red cups like that.

>> No.4329416

"I go through mediocre potboilers like chewing gum and have no apparently discernible character trait or accountable feat of achievement besides having posted on gamefaqs at some undisclosed point in the past - why can't I get the girl of my dreams?" - Swinehawk, Book Chugger and Esteemed Creator of Extraordinary Threads

but whatever just build rapport man