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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/lit/ - Literature

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3856105 No.3856105 [Reply] [Original]

Hey, so, okay, I've just finished my first chapbook of shitty poems and was wondering if you would be content to tear them apart for me.

>> No.3856109

>>3856105

I'd recommend that you share them with knowledgeable people instead of doing it in this teenage cesspool.

>> No.3856112

>>3856109
We're a teenage cesspool, but a brutally honest teenage cesspool. That has to count for something, right?

>> No.3856116

>>3856109
Eh, I don't mind how qualified the people making fun of what I've done are to do so. Will you? You don't have to be kind. Everybody I know in the real world is far too kind. I don't want people to be kind.

>> No.3856119

>>3856112

Not really. Honesty without knowledge is unnecessarily blunt. It can even backfire. I also submit my work but face to face and in circles where I can receive useful feedback to improve my work. Here it will just be shits and giggles. Which are good, don't get me wrong (I am here after all), but not for the purpose pursued by OP.

>> No.3856126

>>3856105
if your poems are bad, we'll tell you. if they're excellent we'll tell you. if they're mediocre, we'll lose interest. Discrimination is our weak point. we don't call gold shit, or shit gold, it's the middle ground where we get fuzzy.

>> No.3856127

>>3856119
In which case would you maybe be willing to have me send it to you directly over skype or something? I don't know what I can offer to make this whole thing seem more appealing. I don't have breasts, and am not sure what else has currency with you people these days.

>> No.3856131

>>3856127
give us one poem and you'll know.

>> No.3856136

>>3856127

The problem is that in here anybody can post, and it is extremely difficult to separate the hay from the gold pebbles.

What I would recommend is to go to your local university's poetry group or to a respectable writers' workshop, where real people can, face to face, read and give you constructive feedback.

>> No.3856160

>>3856136
i agree to an extent, but one thing this place is good for is that if people like your stuff, they'll tell you, and if they see a problem, they'll tell you. there's no currying favor, no making friends, no undercutting rivals or enemies. they don't know who you are, so they're reasonably honest.

>> No.3856165
File: 47 KB, 500x529, 1368419292161.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
3856165

If you've read
Ode less traveled by Stephen Fry,
then we'll look at your poems.

>> No.3856893

Not OP, but wanted to share my poem, what do you guys think?:

When the night is dark
Penguins dominate
Manatees are dead
And stars shine bright
And icebergs float
Over calm and cool oceans
And penguins tell tales by firelight
Then morning comes
A hot sun rises and sears
Melting ice and icebergs
The penguins fall in numbers
And manatees wait
Ready for their next feast

>> No.3856902

>>3856165
Any source on that pic? I like it.

>> No.3856906

>>3856893
>penguins and manatees together
You do know where manatees live, right? Also, this is some nasty-ass verse, and I'm not yet convinced that the pussy game is ridiculous.

>> No.3856917

>>3856906

I wasnt really thinking lol, I don't know where manatees live, I do know they're herbivores though and that this poem is ridiculous

do you mean nasty ass verse in a good way... or were you even talking about my poem

>> No.3857004

>>3856902
Alas, no, I can't even remember where I picked it up, though it must have been one of the boards.

>> No.3857014

>>3856105
Where is this picture from?

>> No.3857026

>>3857014
Looks like Persepolis

>> No.3857032

>>3856906
>You do know where manatees live, right?
In the zoo next to the penguin exhibit.

>> No.3857034

>>3857026
Thanks.

>> No.3857045

>>3856105
We can't give criticism if you don't share them, you know.

>> No.3857055

>>3856917
Bad. I should have been clearer. Also, manatees live in Florida.

>> No.3857082

>>3857055

what animal would you recommend instead to eat penguins

>> No.3857091

>>3857082
Other penguins.

>> No.3857302

I made a poem too /lit/:

there are many things i like about
war, i like the blodd spilling, and the
people who dont deserve to live
dieing