"Are you reading that, just, for like, fun?"

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Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:16:06 2012 No.3005153 [Reply] [Original]

"Are you reading that, just, for like, fun?"

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:20:07 2012 No.3005164 >"What are you doing?" >"Reading." >"Haha, why?"

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:22:07 2012 No.3005166 >"That looks smart" >"uh thanks"

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:26:07 2012 No.3005171 File: 48 KB, 364x450, 12345.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >interrupting my reading every 2 seconds as if we were just talking with the television on

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:30:07 2012 No.3005178 >I want to become a writer >I DO love Steven King

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:31:07 2012 No.3005181 >I want to become a writer >Discussing books is so pretentious

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:37:10 2012 No.3005193 >I'm trying to write a novel, I believe everyone has a book in them >no, I don't read much

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:39:09 2012 No.3005196 >why buy books? Everything's on Wikipedia.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:39:09 2012 No.3005198 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uvs2g5Nj0NI

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:44:09 2012 No.3005204 >I love literature >My favorite novel? >The Stranger, ofcourse. >I can so relate to Mersault >Everything is like, pointless you know?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:47:31 2012 No.3005214 File: 40 KB, 370x321, 1346081862107.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >I hate e-readers >No I don't own one >Because they're not like, authentic, and junk

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:48:32 2012 No.3005219 >wow you have managed to read all the 100 pages of that book?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:50:32 2012 No.3005222 >>3005193 >You are now chatting to a random stranger >You and the stranger both like poetry >Who are your favourite poets? >Me

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:50:32 2012 No.3005225 >>3005219 Don't lie, nobody's ever said that to you.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:51:32 2012 No.3005227 >>3005222 i raged

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:53:19 2012 No.3005231 >what are you reading >a book about a women buying flowers >that sounds boring >its literature, plot doesn't matter >whatever makes you feel better

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:54:19 2012 No.3005232 >>3005225 Do you think that I would go on the internet and lie?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:54:19 2012 No.3005234 >What are you reading? >Finnegans Wake >Oh what's it about? >I...I don't know

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 14:58:19 2012 No.3005244 >>3005232 That's the only reason why I go on the internet

>>	Blueguy of the Fellowship of Being Human !!Ho8YFUnx18C Mon Sep 24 15:01:50 2012 No.3005251 File: 2 KB, 121x126, 1320520867216.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >Hey man, do you read? >Naw man, reading is an outdated medium, why do you still bother with it?

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:03:50 2012 No.3005258

>>3005234
>sitting alone in Starbucks reading Finnegans Wake
>cute hipster girl approaches me
>start trembling with fear
>"Hey! You're reading Finnegans Wake? Is it any good?"
>"I-I think you'll find Finnegans Wake transcends the normative good-bad dichotomy, actually"
>she says she doesn't understand
>snort with laughter
>coffee spurts from my nostrils, along with a single strand of spaghetti
>panicking, I swiftly pull the tablecloth to my nose and blow
>more spaghetti falls out
>try to catch it all in my fedora, but it quickly overflows
>the girl is staring at me in horror
>I stand up, knocking my chair over, and sprint towards the door
>trip on a string of spaghetti that was dangling from my nose
>as I crash to the floor a wet bubble of bolognese sauce escapes from my ass
>attempt to stand but slip on a meatball that has rolled out of my trouser leg
>by now everyone is laughing hysterically
>I try to explain the opening sentence of Finnegans Wake but my mouth is full of spaghetti
>start vomiting uncontrollably
>the spaghetti wraps itself around my neck
>can't breathe
>beg for help but no one can hear me over their laughter
>before dying, make my last confessions:
>"I have no idea what's going on in Finnegans Wake!"
>everything goes black

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:10:52 2012 No.3005275
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>Reading a book, any book.
>People look at me like I'm going to shoot up the school because I don't talk a lot.
>>3005222
>>3005244
Have you guys ever heard of Huey Lewis & The News?

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:13:25 2012 No.3005279
File: 48 KB, 185x218, AMICOOLYET.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Want to join thread
>I don't have any stories.

Oh wait, yes I do.

>So what do you like to read (it's my ice breaker)
>I don't read.
>Wait, like, at all?
>I've never read a book
>Not one?
>No
>Awkward silence

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:14:24 2012 No.3005281 >>3005258 >fedora 10/10

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:14:24 2012 No.3005283

>tfw people outside my room are making lots of noise
>can't go out and join them because I've not had anything to drink and would just sit in the corner, hoping that a few of my friends come and talk to me
>can't concentrate with all the noise
>tfw I just want to read Ulysses in peace

;_;

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:14:24 2012 No.3005284 >>3005275 Never, are they connected somehow?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:15:24 2012 No.3005287 File: 139 KB, 371x314, squint.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005284

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:18:24 2012 No.3005294 File: 38 KB, 500x373, Clooney.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005284

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:19:24 2012 No.3005296 >>3005258 I don't know why the spaghetti falling stories make me laugh so much every time.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:20:24 2012 No.3005298 File: 23 KB, 200x292, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005284

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:20:24 2012 No.3005299 >"I can imagine displaying the books you've read, it must have been a lot of work" No I brought them to school because I am going to read them not because I have read them and am trying to show off holy shit

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:22:27 2012 No.3005301 >>3005299 You threw the book at them, right? Did it hit them in the face?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:23:53 2012 No.3005304 File: 31 KB, 599x314, trolled.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005287 >>3005294 >>3005298

>>	Sunhawk !M9PhF5nIzs Mon Sep 24 15:25:53 2012 No.3005308 Someone post an old brownbear story.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:26:42 2012 No.3005310 File: 16 KB, 226x273, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005304 naw u just dum

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:28:31 2012 No.3005319
File: 37 KB, 420x294, tumblr_lsrx8yjacJ1qdj1nyo1_500.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>hey anon what are you reading?
>n-nothing.... really
>come on, show me, you always read such interesting books
>m-my, would you look at the time, I really need to be going
>but anon, I jus-
>SEE YA

I really need to come out of the damn closet.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:29:31 2012 No.3005322 >>3005319 That's gay, son,

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:32:30 2012 No.3005328 >>3005319 I know that feel. >tfw reaching a higher education, mostly everyone can read English now, instead of just me It's making writing porn in school excessively difficult.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:32:30 2012 No.3005329 >>3005258 I cried with laughter! 10/10 >made my fucking night. Hat's off

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:33:30 2012 No.3005330 >>3005283 >2012 >Not getting royally plastered and singing Ulysses Do you even Joyce?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:36:32 2012 No.3005340 File: 181 KB, 1680x1050, 125565644.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005329 What kind of hat?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:38:32 2012 No.3005347 File: 85 KB, 550x550, phone.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005340

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:41:02 2012 No.3005353 >>3005340 >>3005347 I just realised I made an unintended fedora-pun.

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:42:02 2012 No.3005356
File: 450 KB, 150x120, SUDDENLY BOOKS.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

> A bookstore!
>I guess it won't hurt to look...
>Woah, book!
>You're awfully needy today...
>Book, I can't
>Book, I don't have any money and I need to eat.
>Book! OH GOD, GET AWAY FROM ME BOOK, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
>BOOK! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? I TRUSTED YOU!
>Wait, what are--- ARE THOSE--? MORE BOOKS?!
>NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:48:03 2012 No.3005368 File: 26 KB, 478x366, BreakingBad4506.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005222

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:52:03 2012 No.3005371 >>3005330 What by myself?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:53:03 2012 No.3005376 >>3005330 >>3005371 But I don't have Hemingway to deal with rowdy strangers

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:56:03 2012 No.3005381 >>3005371 Trust me

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:58:03 2012 No.3005382 >>3005376 DEAL WITH HIM HEMMINGWAY! DEAL WITH HIM!

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 15:59:03 2012 No.3005383 You're now watching two strangers discuss your question! Question to discuss: Was DFW a cowardly faggot for killing himself? Stranger 2: his cowardice will be a footnote of his life Stranger 1: he was an hero Stranger 1 has disconnected

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 16:04:03 2012 No.3005394 >>3005258 >>coffee spurts from my nostrils, along with a single strand of spaghetti >Oh boy! There we go!

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 16:05:03 2012 No.3005398

You're now watching two strangers discuss your question!
Question to discuss:
What do you think of Bret Easton Ellis hating on David Foster Wallace?

Stranger 2: idk that both use first middle and last names. dats probably why
Stranger 1 has disconnected

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 16:57:05 2012 No.3005497
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>>3005279

Fuck, if people round here even...I mean...if they I even knew they had the inclination to even ask a question like that I think I'd die from happiness.

Just for one day, we can be heroes, forever and ever! What you say?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 17:01:24 2012 No.3005505 >I don't have time to read, too much schoolwork to do! >spends 8 hours a day on facebook every college-age girl ever

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 17:14:40 2012 No.3005544 >>3005181 eugh

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 17:32:40 2012 No.3005609 >>3005171 the painful reality of living with your girlfriend

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 17:37:40 2012 No.3005617

>Say Anon, do you like to read?
>Oh boy do I! Stuff like *various examples of sci-fi, fantasy, and science-fantasy*
>What, no *deep, introspective authors*?
>Uh... not really, no. I like more adventure-y books.
>Awkward silence as everyone now wonders if I'm actually semi-retarded and really good at hiding it

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 17:39:40 2012 No.3005623 File: 19 KB, 117x111, 1291422147184.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3005231 >plot doesn't matter would rage again

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 18:46:25 2012 No.3005805 >Man, I love reading >What's your favorite series? >Harry Potter

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 18:52:25 2012 No.3005819 >>3005623 >implying plot matters

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 18:53:25 2012 No.3005822 >>3005805 >implying good literature comes in 'series'

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:08:46 2012 No.3005859 >>3005822 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_Search_of_Lost_Time

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:33:49 2012 No.3005913 Can't believe this one hasn't popped up yet. >What class is that for? I'LL KILL YOU

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:42:08 2012 No.3005929 >>3005913 >tfw read textbooks as a hobby

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:42:08 2012 No.3005930 >>3005913 Yeah, but if you're on campus or in school that's a perfectly fair mistake.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:43:08 2012 No.3005932 >>3005929 It's never a textbook. That's why it's enraging.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:44:11 2012 No.3005933 >>3005930 I would understand, "Is that for a class?" It's an irritating assumption.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:47:10 2012 No.3005937 >>3005822 hehe

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 19:51:10 2012 No.3005946 >>3005819 >implying plot doesn't matter. Prose with no plot is pure shit. Plot with no prose is readable shit.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 21:47:08 2012 No.3006216 >>3005279 My friends are always shocked that I've never been to a live concert, and it makes me wonder if they feel the same way about me as I do about people who've never read a book.

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 21:55:56 2012 No.3006234

>friends know I'm reading For Whom The Bell Tolls
>one day, they're half-making fun of me, saying they can see me pulling the shade in my room and doing nothing but reading Hemingway and drinking scotch
>mfw I realized my friends didn't think that sounded as awesome as I did
>mfw I have no face

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:08:13 2012 No.3006264

>be living in one of the non-Florida States of the southeast U.S.
>see people reading a lot
>see book clubs
>it's always the same book, or rather single-volume collection of books

still though, i think it compares favorably with the prototypical Christians Who Have Never Actually Read The Bible (CWHNARTB). at least with this shade, they actually know what the fuck they're talking about when it comes to the content of biblical texts (if not always the origin, historicity, or historical background thereof), meaning that when debating them, you don't have to simultaneously educate them in the content of the book they place their belief in. feels good man.

when they're seen reading non-Bible, it's Harry Potter or Hunger Games.

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:11:14 2012 No.3006270

>hey anon what are you reading?
>hand him The Brothers Karamazov
>OMG this looks thick, is it any good?
>It disproves God, and has a great plot.
>You're an atheist?
>Yes.
>Oh.
>awkward silence
>SHOOT. I have to go to class, see you later anon!

>I continued to read alone, peacefully

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:22:20 2012 No.3006290 >>3005258 would read again 10/10

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:22:20 2012 No.3006294 File: 159 KB, 282x318, christ-laughing.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3006270 >disproving god

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:22:20 2012 No.3006296 >>3006270 oh wow it's like you're trolling or something

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:28:52 2012 No.3006310 File: 74 KB, 400x400, tricked.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3006270

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:29:42 2012 No.3006315
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>Be in High school Track team.
>waiting for my event to start.
>Try reading my assign copy of Frankenstein.
>cute girl from other School start to scoot to side.
>"Hey! How are you? What are you reading for?"
>"Well it my assignment"
> awkward silent....
>Start to look around to see if anyone is putting her up to this.
>"why are you sitting next to me?"
>"Well you look lonely and Sad since your reading by yourself. "
>"WELL.... Look's like it about time for my event! I should try to warm up with my teammates. See you later."
>I was only sitting down for 5 minutes.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:29:42 2012 No.3006316 >>3006270 >it disproves God did you even read it? that's the worst interpretation of the brothers K i think i've ever seen if you're not trolling

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:49:40 2012 No.3006350 >>3006315 Face it: you were an awkward, socially-retarded spaz who oozed sadness and attracted only pity and hatred from others. You probably still are, aren't you?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:56:58 2012 No.3006360 >>3006234 That does sound awesome. Your friends are meany heads.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 22:58:58 2012 No.3006365 File: 12 KB, 245x300, 245px-Frans_Hals_-_Portret_van_Ren%C3%A9_Descartes[1].jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3006315

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 23:12:15 2012 No.3006387 ">omg anon, your obsession with russian books is sooo weird" >"yeah anon, are you a commie or something haha"

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 23:18:17 2012 No.3006398
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>anon if you read so many weird books you won't be able to have any conversations with people at parties. why don't you read more autobiographies or gentlemen's magazines like GQ? you can't isolate yourself like this from everyday people and new trends. look at your sister she's got an active social life and friends and she doesn't read any of that weird crap.

Shut up, mom.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 24 23:33:20 2012 No.3006432 >this books has only 300 pages? i read one with over 600! (said by an graduate of philosophy... something died this day)

Anonymous Mon Sep 24 23:45:39 2012 No.3006458

>out at nightclub (yes really)
>having great MDMA fuelled conversation with hot girl
>she asks me about my writing because someone told her i write
>asks what i write about
>"well, i had one published recently; it was about an old woman with dementia who visits her dying and also demented husband"
>don't get the cute points i expected, it's sort of awkward
>play it off and continue tuning her
>but don't take her home that night

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:06:29 2012 No.3006505 >>3006432 I've read In Search of Lost Time just for these people.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:16:01 2012 No.3006521 >wow Koushun Takami, is that like manga or something?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:20:02 2012 No.3006528 >>3006458 >tuning her Is this some kind of weird radio or music or car metaphor?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:36:03 2012 No.3006556 >>3006458 I have always been careful to say the right things in parties so I don't ruin the festive ambient. Normalfags. They're so fragile.

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:37:03 2012 No.3006557

>browsing at the local Barnes and Noble
>The Marriage Plot huh, seems interesting
>a girl is watching me from across a bookshelf, I can only see her head
>she's looking at me, what do I do
>don't fucking look at her, don't do it, keep your eyes on the book and she'll go away
>she approaches
>don't look at her you idiot
>my eyes fall upon her sinful body for just a moment
>oh god why are her boobs so big
>"Hey," she says, "is that Jeffrey Eugenides?"
>"Yep," I say gutturally
>she gets so close I begin to sweat
>"He's really good," she says
>I stutter out something incomprehensible
>my world is falling apart
>she bends over, good god almighty
>not now boner
>picks up Middlesex, says it's her favorite
>"Oh yeah?" I say goofily. "What are you, a hermaphrodite or something?"
>long silence
>"What if i was?"

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:41:03 2012 No.3006558 >>3006521 >implying reading Koushun Takami makes you worthy of any more respect than reading manga

>>	Standard Toaster !TOAST5/GiQ Tue Sep 25 00:43:03 2012 No.3006559 >>3006557 I feel like there needs to be more to this and I would appreciate it if you would finish it.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:44:04 2012 No.3006562 >go into bookshop with gf >gf says "that blonde girl is checking you out" >buy book and go home >have sex while fantasizing about blonde girl >everythingwentbetterthanexpected Can't remember the book.

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:47:03 2012 No.3006564
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>Junior year teacher was going to make us read Great Gatsby
>pretty excited to discuss it and read it
>class bitches and moans until she just makes us watch the movie and not read it at all
>fuck
>fine, just read it by myself
>"oh my god why would you waste so much time reading that?"

>1-1.5 hours max
>so much time

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:48:04 2012 No.3006566 >>3006557 >"What if i was?" > i would love to suck your dick then? wink always the right answer

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:53:38 2012 No.3006568 >>3006564 >doing my GCSEs >have to study Romeo and Juliet and a book by Meera Syal about her childhood >read neither >get A* Probably best that Gove decided to scrap them.

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 00:55:38 2012 No.3006571

>working at Barnes and Noble circa release of first Twilight movie
>have three tables overflowing with Stephanie Meyer's garbage
>clearly labeled 'Stephanie Meyer - Twilight'
>have at least five hambeast soccer moms per day waddle in
>come straight up to desk
>ask 'Do you have that teenage vampire book?'
>always claim it's for their daughters
>was regularly asked my opinions on it because at the time was seventeen year old girl
>enjoy growing hatred of humanity

>same store, same year
>nice middle-aged woman comes up to ask for recommendations
>'Sure, I love giving recommendations! What do you like?'
>'Oh, literature. You know, like Jodi Picoult'

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:01:41 2012 No.3006577 >>3005356 Dat feel. Never get on Amazon while drunk. Jesus Christ.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:13:27 2012 No.3006605 >friend mentions she's getting a Kindle >"do you read a lot?" >"no, but they look cool"

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:15:00 2012 No.3006613
File: 65 KB, 500x373, sergio garval - hormigas.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I already did this thread but I extended too much and got just one answer. Give me poets who write in Spanish. No Neruda or Dario (nothing against them I just didn't like them when I tried). I have liked Luis Alberto Arellano, Coral Bracho and I am about to get a package of books by Oliverio Girondo.

This is also a poetry in Spanish general

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:16:00 2012 No.3006614 >>3006571 You and I belong together

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:18:00 2012 No.3006622 >>3006605 I was in a Barnes and Noble and some woman was buying a nook or whatever their e-reader is and the guy was telling her the reading perks and she said "I don't care about that, I just want to use it for the internet."

>>	Standard Toaster !TOAST5/GiQ Tue Sep 25 01:18:00 2012 No.3006624 >>3006571 I know that feel, it's the same for 50 Shades and Hunger Games. It's awful. They're all over the store and somehow people can't find them without my help.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:19:00 2012 No.3006625 >>3006566 I've used this line on more than one occation and on all occations it has proved to be anything but the right answer.

>>	Standard Toaster !TOAST5/GiQ Tue Sep 25 01:21:33 2012 No.3006635 >>3006613 Fernando Pessoa wrote poems, but not in Spanish. He was Portuguese and thus wrote his poems in Portuguese.

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:22:33 2012 No.3006637

>>3006613
ups, sorry, wrong window... I'll contribute:

>highschool religious retirement
>we have a 40 minutes recess
>I go to a more secluded place and open my book
>a group of girls come to me "do you like to read?"
>some jiggles etc.
>I answer in stark manner and finally they desist
>mfw I only wanted to read then and I only want to fuck now

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:23:34 2012 No.3006639

>>3006559
>somebody call the Olive Garden, I'm all outta spaghetti
>"w-well I guess I'd j-just, I guess, I d-dunno, I'd probably"
>"I admit, it would be pretty strange," she says. "If a girl you never met just comes up and says she has..."
>she whispers. "A penis."
>"Yep that'd be pretty strange!" I squeak while frantically trying to shove The Marriage Plot back on the shelf
>get in there you cocksucker
>I drop the book
>Jesus Christ
>"You're all flustered," she says, giggling
>I mutter like an idiot and go to pick up the book
>she's wearing slacks so I can't get any upskirt action, not that I would anyway
>I'm a man of honor and dignity
>but I gotta get outta here, I've overstayed my welcome, I need to rehydrate
>"Well, I-I'll be going now..."
>"Do you think I can't see your boner?"
>uh oh
>I back away and stumble on a small child
>motherfucker
>land on my ass, the girl is standing over me, the kid is crying
>she sweeps up the kid and calms him, sends him on his way
>"If you run away again I'll scream rape," she says
>okay.jpg
>"I have to use the ladies room, would you mind coming with?"
>"Th-the l-ladies room, or the men's room?"
>"Whichever."
>insert extremely graphic dickings

>>	Standard Toaster !TOAST5/GiQ Tue Sep 25 01:24:04 2012 No.3006646 >>3006639 Thanks.

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:24:04 2012 No.3006647

>>3006614
Sorry bro, my writing is my only lover. We can be friends though.

>>3006624
Man, I thought about that recently. I feel fucking bad for anybody working at a bookstore right now. My usual MO was to recommend them similar but arguably better books. Seriously, that shitty romance section is full of 'erotic' literature, BDSM, vampires, and fucking vampire BDSM. Or here's an idea, read something good for once in your life, shit.

Man, I got way too mad working at that store. Even so, I miss it. I wish the one around here would fucking hire already.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:24:34 2012 No.3006642 >>3006637 by the way, I did mean jiggle but they did so as they giggled

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:25:04 2012 No.3006648 >>3006637 What were they jiggling?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:26:04 2012 No.3006653 File: 249 KB, 371x470, 1278820989534.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >Do you read? >No, it makes my head hurt

Standard Toaster !TOAST5/GiQ Tue Sep 25 01:26:04 2012 No.3006657

>>3006647
They always ask me for recommendations for similar books to 50 Shades of Grey, and I always internally ask them "do I look like I read that genre of fiction?" the answer to which, of course, is "no."
When they ask me I usually tell them Twilight and justify it by saying that 50 Shades was originally Twilight fan-fiction and then they stop asking me questions.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:29:04 2012 No.3006668 >>3006648 I thought it was obvious. Their jiggly parts, their boobs, some of them already had them pretty big. Although I like smaller breasts in general.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:32:04 2012 No.3006673 >>3006657 Just tell them Lolita. That, or The Collector. "What, don't you like kinky sex and power imbalances in relationships?"

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:34:05 2012 No.3006676 >>3006647 omg i write too lol clearly its destiny

Standard Toaster !TOAST5/GiQ Tue Sep 25 01:39:52 2012 No.3006681

>>3006673
I feel that if I suggest Lolita then they might mistake me for a pedophile and I could lose my job.
I usually just field the question to another bookseller, and luckily there's roughly 10 new 50 Shades copies out that they can recommend.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 01:46:40 2012 No.3006693 >>3005178 >2012 >Being pretentious >>3005198 >Bill Hicks >Good

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 02:58:43 2012 No.3006772 >>3006681 >losing your job for recommending a literary classic

Standard Toaster !TOAST5/GiQ Tue Sep 25 03:13:46 2012 No.3006797

>>3006772
If somebody asks me for an erotica novel that I enjoyed in a similar vein to 50 Shades of Grey and I recommend them a novel dealing with pedophilia, they'd most likely complain to my manager and make a big deal out of it and I would probably lose my job as a result.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 04:24:48 2012 No.3006899 >>3006772 Toaster is right. There are a lot of biggots out there, you don't risk your job like that.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 04:47:42 2012 No.3006922 File: 17 KB, 448x122, thoreauface.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3006398 >tfw when realizing thoreau and ellen degeneres have the same face

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 04:50:41 2012 No.3006924

>>3006398
>>GQ
I read invidiual passages of GQ twice while shitting at a friends house, this magazine is so excruciatingly, horribly dumb. It's one of these things that can really make you lose faith in mankind. I think it's fair to say GQ is worse than rape.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 04:50:41 2012 No.3006925 >>3006613 read any lorca?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 04:55:41 2012 No.3006928 >>3006647 >MO Is that short for modus operandi? If so, how many people do you expect to get it?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 04:57:41 2012 No.3006929 >>3006928 not that guy but the words "my" and "MO" are heard pretty frequently together

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 05:49:10 2012 No.3006960 File: 1.08 MB, 267x199, 0v1cR.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >you read >you must be smart!

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 06:02:05 2012 No.3006973 >>3006365 Lol'd

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 08:17:50 2012 No.3007139 >>3006315 such a dark and edgy loner

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 09:05:12 2012 No.3007173 >>3006315 more or less she probably wanted to talk to you but you accidentallly stone-walled her

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 09:13:16 2012 No.3007179 I read in the break room at work a lot. If I ever pass someone on the way to or from it, I always get the laugh and head shake, "You and your books"

Omar B !xeS.CIM.Jk Tue Sep 25 10:24:17 2012 No.3007258

Why is it when you are reading, the whole world seems to think you are free to talk to or otherwise entertain them? I never got it. The worst part is if they ask you about the book, but not generally. As if they want you to tell them the whole story.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 11:17:29 2012 No.3007346 >>3007179 Fucking that one. And family members recommending chick lit or badly written books about vampires because "you read, don't you?", as if each and every book is the same thing.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 11:20:29 2012 No.3007349 My German teacher: >What are you reading this time, anon? >W.B. Yeats >Why don't you read something proper?

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 11:32:35 2012 No.3007374

>>3007346
I have a really nice auntie and uncle, who I absolutely adore. Every time I see them they buy me a new book, and it's all such garbage, but I love them too much to tell them that. I just smile, thank them enthusiastically and promise that I'll read it when I get home.

I always feel like such a dick.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 11:46:36 2012 No.3007398 >make out with qt girl at night club >go home to her place >there are no books in her room >anywhere

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 12:09:42 2012 No.3007431 >>3007398 What're you complaining about? You're in a book A fantasy book

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 12:09:42 2012 No.3007433 >>3007398 >nightclub >expecting patrons, especially club sluts, to read books Any girl smart enough to read regularly is not a clubgoer who will make out and go home with random dudes.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 12:15:59 2012 No.3007442 >>3007433 That's not true at all. All of the girls I know go to Russell group universities, with a majority doing things like Law and shit. Yet most of them go to clubs regularly, and only a handful of them would avoid fucking someone at a club.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 12:35:20 2012 No.3007476 >>3005328 University life made me appreciate my horrible handwriting.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 12:46:20 2012 No.3007490 >>3007433 >implying german/european clubs are not full of qt hipster gfs that you could expect to read >implying no intellectual girls are into underground electronic music culture americlaps... that's another story obviously.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:02:55 2012 No.3007513 >>3007490 >implying there are americlaps who can read and thus post in this thread

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:06:55 2012 No.3007524 >>3007374 Could you ask them to give you book tokens instead?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:09:55 2012 No.3007529 >>3007524 >Could you ask them to give you book tokens instead?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:11:56 2012 No.3007532 >>3007490 >implying german hipster qts read

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:11:56 2012 No.3007533 >>3007490 >qt hipster gfs Is this honestly a thing on 4chan now? Even on /lit/? I suppose /a/ really is very well protected by the quarantines.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:12:55 2012 No.3007535 >>3007532 They're too busy committing genocide.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:14:55 2012 No.3007537 File: 36 KB, 374x508, yawn.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>3007535

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:14:55 2012 No.3007539 >>3007529 >>Could you ask them to give you book tokens instead?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 13:24:29 2012 No.3007554 >>3007533 where else on here would people possibly champion hipsters aside from /mu/ or possibly /fa/? /lit/ IS a qt hipster gf.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 15:57:51 2012 No.3007883 >>3007554 /lit/ is /mu/'s gt hipster cruch

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 15:58:51 2012 No.3007885 >>3007883 good thing /mu/ will never get laid

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 16:40:17 2012 No.3008029 >>3005204 If that came out of the mouth of a 19-year old parisienne in the 1960s it would be extremely hot

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 16:45:19 2012 No.3008055 >>3006216 I've never been to one either. The thing is, I wanted to go to one a few times, but anxiety always go the best of me and I stayed home, staring at my ticket, eventually cursing myself and crying.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 16:54:19 2012 No.3008097 >>3005356 Every goddamned time. >A vintage bookstore? I'll check it out, the books will be cheap and I got about $20 on me. >Leave with 18 books and spent $200~ from my bank account using my debit card That was 2 years ago and I read 3 of those books.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 17:02:56 2012 No.3008140 >>3007885 Fuck I hate the people on /mu/. They should stay away from this board.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 17:19:55 2012 No.3008211 >>3007537 Why can I spot a Hermes tie from a thumbnail? Never again, /fa/.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 17:37:45 2012 No.3008269 File: 392 KB, 600x937, lolita[1].png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >you read? What's your favourite book? >uhhhh.......

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 18:16:21 2012 No.3008420 Silly plebs, don't they wish they were as smart as us hyper intelligent /lit browsers?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 18:18:21 2012 No.3008426 File: 11 KB, 197x197, inbrugespic9.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >why are you even reading that? you know there's a movie, right?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 18:43:42 2012 No.3008504 >Oprah Book Club seal of approval

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 19:00:21 2012 No.3008560 >>3008504 What? Tolstoy, Márquez, Dickens, Faulkner. A lot of the stuff she's chosen is actually quite great.

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 19:01:21 2012 No.3008563
File: 2.00 MB, 177x238, 1348602166653.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>3008426

>hey anon whats that book?
>its game of thrones, i hear its quite good
>lol anon, what a waste of time, theres a series in HBO, didnt you know that?
>...yeah but its better cuz you can imagine those great place, and see whats the character thought
>lol anon your funny, the tv shows all that shit and its far better that use a your imagination

This was a actual conversation

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 19:01:21 2012 No.3008566 >>3006270 brothers karamazov does not disprove god you conceited faggot

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 19:10:22 2012 No.3008599 >>3008563 Who takes the time to replace bottle caps before killing themselves?

Anonymous Tue Sep 25 19:12:21 2012 No.3008603
File: 83 KB, 784x811, average feel.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>sit alone at lunch in high school
>dont eat
>just read
>one year, some kid joins me
>"so you like reading too, huh?"
>"yeah"
>go back to reading, only occasionally talking - about 2 days per week

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 19:50:57 2012 No.3008716 >>3008599 apparently, that guy...

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 25 19:58:29 2012 No.3008743 >>3008560 Yeah but that sticker makes me not want to read them.

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/lit/ - Literature