/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.2999490]

Ladies,

Since so many of you request guides to writing, and general advice on how to overcome writer's block/come up with ideas/finish your work, I bring you aid.

Please find enclosed theonly guide you'll ever need: The Mark E Smith Guide to Writing Guide.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jD6Msphh_Mw

If you can't write after listening, you're not a writer, you might as well go back to working on the bins.

You're welcome.

[Anonymous No.2999552]

>Day One : Hang around house all day writing bits of useless information on bits of paper

lol, how true.

[Anonymous No.2999600]

Where are the obligatory niggers?

[Anonymous No.2999601]

>>2999600
Hey there fuckface.

[Anonymous No.2999610]

>>2999601

THIS IS THE HOME OF THE VAIN!
THIS IS THE HOME OF THE VAIN!

[Anonymous No.2999651]

No '80s reprobates
Fall sound
No laptop wankers overground
With Fall sound
It's a business line not a chat line
"Wonderin' what's up?"
It's Fall sound!

[Anonymous No.3000572]

>Day Two : Decide lack of inspiration due to too much isolation and non-fraternisation. Go to pub. Have drinks.

[Anonymous No.3000932]

>Day Three : Get up and go to pub. Hold on in there a style is on it's way. Through sheer boredom and drunkenness, talk to people in pub.

[Anonymous No.3000983]

Guys, I'm stuck on day three. How do I get past day three?

h e l p

[Anonymous No.3000990]

>Day Four : By now, people in the pub should be continually getting on your nerves. Write things about them on backs of beer mats.

[Anonymous No.3001959]

>Day Five : Go to pub. This is where true penmanship stamina comes into it's own as by now, guilt, drunkenness, the people in the pub and the fact you're one of them should combine to enable you to write out of sheer vexation. To write out of sheer vexation.

[Anonymous No.3002075]

>M.R. James, be born, be born
>Yog Sogoth. Rape me Lord.
>I've suffered a great wrong
>Such hatred, Church's song

[Anonymous No.3002172]

>I had to wank off the dog to feed the fucking cat.

[Anonymous No.3002181]

>>3002172
>>3002172

He actually wanked off the cat to feed the fucking dog.

do U even fall?

[Anonymous No.3002254]

>>3002172
>>3002181


>covering Greek heavy metal
>2012

ishig-ah.

[Anonymous No.3002353]

>Day Six : If possible stay home. And write. If not go to pub.

[Anonymous No.3002694]

>Using this method this is a poem I wrote called

>Manchester

Dear TV Times,

Your majesties, I have concocted, through the noble invention and Blarney-craft of the humble Northerner, a system whereby constant annoyance by the telephone can be erased. This entails explosive charges left to me by a dead sailor from Bury being wired-up under every window sill in close proximity to my ears. When phones ring and are inconvenient to the ears, I just press table-lamp-like button next to my bed and they blow up. I got the idea from a book.

Yours sincerely,

Mr Reg Varney

Once you get a bit of pain I was splitting meself.
Them 'illybillies!
Manchester is Manchester ship, cringing for punishment

The Gurkhas keep on advancing
The old cronies babble on TV
The leaders of the kids are drinking whisky with the rich
While the sparks fly in the plaza
Where the workers mass together

I got the idea from a book
I got the idea from a book
Them 'illybillies!
Them 'illybillies!

[Anonymous No.3002703]

Mark e smiths guide to being an edgy teenager

[Anonymous No.3002710]

>>3002703

I honestly doubt he can remember being a teenager. What is he, like 100 years old?

[Anonymous No.3002713]

op is a fag

go to bed op. its a school night

[Anonymous No.3002724]

>>3002713

>posting pictures of Philip K Dick in a Mark E. Smith thread
>2012

Do you even anything?

[Anonymous No.3002733]

>>3002713

I'm trying to provide a service, you wanker.

/lit/ is constantly bleeding from its collective vagina about writer's block, how do I write, tfw no novel etc etc, and I was trying to help out with advice from one of the best writers in Britain.

If you don't like it, then I don't know what to say.

[Anonymous No.3002731]

>1983
when poor people could afford to get pissed in the pub 6 days a week

>2012
pint costs over £3. 10 pints to get pissed = £30 = £180 per week = £720 per month

job seekers allowance in 2012 = £224 per month

[Anonymous No.3002739]

>>3002731

But when you factor in inflation, heroin and cannabis are a lot cheaper than in the 80s, so it all balances out.

[Anonymous No.3002741]

>>3002724
>"Philip K Dick"
>trying to make old people angry
>2012

ISHIGGYDIGGYDOO

[Anonymous No.3002756]

>>3002739
>lives with parents
>has any idea about what the costs of living are today V 30 years ago
>doesn't understand the mark e smith lifestyle is no longer viable.... unless mooching off parents like overgrown man-child.... thus inhibiting the creative development and process needed to write good stuff

[Anonymous No.3002763]

>>3002756

Actually, my parents are both dead, and I'm shockingly old for 4chan. I've been a fan of The Fall for a very long time.

When I was a kid, hash cost about £15 an eighth - it was still the same price last time I was in England a couple of years ago. As stated, if you factor in inflation, it's gone down in price enormously. Beer at that time was 90p a pint.

[Anonymous No.3002789]

Fucking Mark E Smith thread on /lit/. OP is not a faggot this day

[Anonymous No.3002803]

hey there fuckface!

when are they touring next. i need fix

[Anonymous No.3002810]

My first pack of B&H was £1.20. Come at me obligatory niggers.

[Anonymous No.3002836]

>>3002763
>hash cost about £15 an eighth - it was still the same price last time I was in England a couple of years ago.

If you're buying from a standard street dealer:
-Hash, as in normal resin/soap is about £10 an eighth.
-Moroccan black/squidgy is about £20.
-Weed is about £20 too, but you're luck if you get 3.5g. Most street dealers call it a '20 bag' now, not an eight.

[Anonymous No.3002849]

>>3002731
White Ace

[Anonymous No.3003287]

>>3002803

constantly, I can't imagine Mark E. Smith has two ha'pennies to rub together

Fri, Nov 30 Brudenell Social Club, Leeds

Not exactly Caesar's Palace.

[Anonymous No.3003331]

>>3002836

I'll confess that I haven't bought an eighth since I was at school. Half a bar used to be about £175 or something when I lived there. But it was really hard to get soft black. Everybody's smoking weed in the UK these days.

[Anonymous No.3003489]

[Anonymous No.3004502]

Considering the number of people who whine and kvetch about their writing and the difficulty thereof, I expected more from this thread.


/lit/ I am disappoint. Why you no bring me new writing based on the Smith method?

[Anonymous No.3004550]

The Fall are curating salford festival atm. I saw them the other day in a tiny room full of uptight BBC execs. Shit was intense, yo.

[Anonymous No.3005161]

[Anonymous No.3006182]

Is this about how he wrote elastic man?