/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.2918898]

>2012
>Not reading all of William Johnstone's books

I bet you voted for Obama, didn't you faggots.

[Anonymous No.2918908]

A college professor, an avowed Atheist, was teaching his class.

He shocked several of his students when he flatly stated he was going to prove there was no God.

Addressing the ceiling he shouted: "God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you 15 minutes!"

The lecture room fell silent. You could have heard a pin fall.

Ten minutes went by. Again he taunted God, saying, "Here I am, God. I'm still waiting."

His count-down got down to the last couple of minutes when a Marine - just released from active duty and newly registered in the class - walked up to the professor, hit him full force in the face, and sent him tumbling from his lofty platform.

The professor was out cold! At first, the students were shocked and babbled in confusion. The young Marine took a seat in the front row and sat silent.

The class fell silent...waiting.

Eventually, the professor came to, shaken he looked at the young Marine in the front row. When the professor regained his senses and could speak he asked: "What's the matter with you? Why did you do that?"

"God was busy. He sent the Marines."

USA USA USA
USA USA USA
USA USA USA
USA USA USA
USA USA USA

[Anonymous No.2918916]

>>2918908

like dis if u cry evry time

[Anonymous No.2918940]

>>2918908
Do you have the one about evolution and a rock? That one always gets me.

[Anonymous No.2918945]

>>2918908
You laugh, but that's basically the synopsis of everyone of his books.

>Muslims/Mexicans are invading
>Liberal politicians either won't do anything about it or are actively helping them do it.
>Ex-special forces operative kills them all
>USA USA USA

Don't believe me?

Jackknife
America Is Under Attack
And this time, it's not New York City or Washington.

A sleeper cell of Middle Eastern terrorists are targeting the heartland: an all-American superstore on opening day, right outside of Fort Worth, Texas. The day after Thanksgiving. As insurance, the terrorists have also hidden a suitcase nuke somewhere in the store which they plan to detonate--a strike fifty times worse than 9/11 that will paralyze America.

A Plot To Cripple The Country

Brad Parker is the lone American intelligence agent who uncovers the plot after a raid on a terrorist training camp in Pakistan. But Parker is one man up against the inept bureaucracy of Homeland Security and the State Department--who refuse to listen...and now it's too late.

They Call Him Jacknife

The only thing stopping the kill-crazy terrorists is already inside the superstore--a truck-driving, former Special Forces op named John "Jacknife" McCabe. He's where the perfect terror plan is about to blow apart. Because Jacknife won't go down without a fight. And with this guy as leader, the terrorists will find their way to paradise a lot sooner than they think...

[Anonymous No.2918951]

>>2918908

what a stupid story

pyscho Marine attacking a Prof is proof of what?

that most of the people in the American services are stupid

[Anonymous No.2918955]

>>2918945
>A sleeper cell of Middle Eastern terrorists are targeting the heartland: an all-American superstore

Is this real life?

[Anonymous No.2918960]

>>2918945
>John "Jacknife" McCabe

[Anonymous No.2918961]

>>2918940

A Jewish, communist, homosexual liberal ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was once teaching a class on Karl Marx.

"Before the class begins," the Jewish abortion doctor said, "you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!"

At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL stood up, holding up a rock.

"How old is this rock, Eurofag?"

The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly. He smugly replied, "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian."

"Wrong. It's been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and if evolution, as you say, is real then it should be an animal by now."

The professor was visibly shaken and dropped his chalk. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears (the same tears liberals cry for the "poor", who today live in such luxury that most own refrigerators and jealously try to claw justly earned wealth from the deserving job creators).

The students applauded and all registered Republican that day before accepting Jesus Christ as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag, shedding a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague "AIDS" and was tossed into a lake of fire to rot for all eternity.

Semper Fi.

[Anonymous No.2918966]

>>2918951
Some fringe groups in the extreme right wing believe education is wrong and promotes elitism. They seriously believe going to college is anti-American.

[Anonymous No.2918967]

>>2918951
It's not a true story. It comes from a chain email spread around by right wing nutters. Which was then taken by 4chan and exaggerated (though the original was still pretty retarded).

[Anonymous No.2918975]

>>2918955
They're coming for your Wal-Mart. Be afraid.

[Anonymous No.2918978]

>>2918961
Thanks you!

[Anonymous No.2918989]

>>2918966
It's not even that fringe.

Earlier in the GOP primary, it was a common statement on Fox News forums that Jon Huntsman was un-american for being able to speak Mandarin.

[Anonymous No.2918993]

Sounds like The Turner Diaries.

[Anonymous No.2919003]

>>2918989
Fox appeals to the fringe. It's no real surprise that they'd come out and say something like that.

[Anonymous No.2919013]

>>2919003
Not really. Pretty much the right most third of the country.

[Anonymous No.2919015]

Sometimes I'm genuinely frightened by America. It's like being trapped in a prison cell with a aggressive borderline retard who is clearly stronger than you.

[Anonymous No.2919028]

>>2919015
You live here anon? I'm in Oklahoma and I've got to say the amount of ignorant rednecks living here is staggering. Someone got knifed a couple weeks back for saying they were voting for Obama.

[Anonymous No.2919042]

>>2919028
No, but even in Europe I feel nearby enough to be frightened. But I think the whole world feels that way.

[Anonymous No.2919118]

Remember The Alamo:
Only career politicians could dream up a stunt like this: courting the growing Hispanic community that keeps them in office, the geniuses in charge in San Antonio agree to grant temporary dominion over the Alamo to the Mexican government for a week-long celebration. That doesn't sit too well with Gulf War vet Phil Cody, who remembers his Texas history.With veterans from wars as far back as WWII, Cody organizes a non-violent protest on the day of the handover. But word comes from Mexico that the re-conquistandors - anti-American extremists determined to reassert Mexican control over the south western US by the bloodiest means necessary - are planning to take over the Alamo permanently. Peace becomes war.Despite ample warning, the American authorities twiddle their thumbs when the re-conquistadors make their move, leaving it up to Cody and his band of patriots, who are seriously outnumbered and outgunned, to protect the Alamo. Left out to dry by their own government, history repeats itself as Americans are once again besieged and forced to take a stand to preserve their heritage.

[Anonymous No.2919123]

FUCK ROMNEY

OBAMA 2012

[Anonymous No.2919124]

>>2919042
Just jealous of our freedom

[Anonymous No.2919125]

Remember the Alamo:
Only career politicians could dream up a stunt like this: courting the growing Hispanic community that keeps them in office, the geniuses in charge in San Antonio agree to grant temporary dominion over the Alamo to the Mexican government for a week-long celebration. That doesn't sit too well with Gulf War vet Phil Cody, who remembers his Texas history.With veterans from wars as far back as WWII, Cody organizes a non-violent protest on the day of the handover. But word comes from Mexico that the re-conquistandors - anti-American extremists determined to reassert Mexican control over the south western US by the bloodiest means necessary - are planning to take over the Alamo permanently. Peace becomes war.Despite ample warning, the American authorities twiddle their thumbs when the re-conquistadors make their move, leaving it up to Cody and his band of patriots, who are seriously outnumbered and outgunned, to protect the Alamo. Left out to dry by their own government, history repeats itself as Americans are once again besieged and forced to take a stand to preserve their heritage.