/wg/ - Writing General

[Anonymous No.23398398]

Behold! The Power of AI Edition

/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION:https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ(embed)
RESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS:https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvC(embed)

Please limit excerpts to one post.
Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.
Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.
If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.
Violent shills, relentless shill-spammers, and grounds keeping prose, should be ignored and reported.

Previous: >>23382472

[Anonymous No.23398403]

>>23398398
reposting for feedback
https://pastebin.ai/zdfaournet
https://hastebin.com/share/nevenogije.css
just a couple places in case the first one doesn’t work
i’m worried my writing is repetitive and crap

[/wg/ No.23398419]

>>23398398
>23398280

[Anonymous No.23398427]

>>23398419
you messed up that one. don't worry, it happens

[Anonymous No.23398428]

>>23398398
I choose this thread because it was titled

>>23398419
>newfag with the "/wg/" still in his name cant even link his shitty thread properly

[Anonymous No.23398491]

>>23398398
As requested by >>23393776 here's a paragraph of the project I'm working on, which is sci fi schlock. It's first draft material, for sure.

The sun was setting in glorious golden, orange, and purple hues as it slipped below a boxy horizon of low income apartments and industrial buildings. Gus gripped the wheel inside his car and listened to the engine fans kick off. His eyes scanned the parking lot, mostly cheap shitboxes, and glanced at Mikey’s.
Mikey’s was a grungy diner, a large one story restaurant with a square footprint, squeaky overstuffed booth seats, out of fashion chrome everything, and exterior bulb lights which ran on every straight edge of the trim. Twenty-four hours, salad bar, and burgers so greasy it would be considered an ecological disaster to throw them in the ocean.
Gus clicked off the already hushed radio with a swift flick and then reached into the breast of his blazer jacket. His palm gripped around the body-warmed steel of a chunky pistol, which he slid out of its jackass-style shoulder holster.
His eyes looked over the dark gunmetal gray of the gun. An ancient Colt-style 1911, chambered in .45 American-Auto Rimless (Pistol). It had been in his family for generations, and if his late father’s tales were to be believed, it had been brought over from Earth itself. Or a version of it, at least. Nothing in it was original. The frame had been replaced with a high-speed feeding ramp variant, the slide and barrel swapped out with a shorter ‘Commando’ configuration, the aftermarket trigger group was so crisp that the pull felt like a glass rod snapping, and of course white pine checkered grips which snugged into his hand better than most pairs of gloves he owned.
It was an heirloom piece. He knew which parts were installed by his grandfather, which his father had swapped out, and which upgrades he saw fit to swap in. There was a shoebox somewhere in his apartment with enough ‘old’ parts collected over the generations that one could build several complete firearms just from those bits. But those weren’t his pistol. Only this one was. And his latest contribution to the family pistol was a ghostly holo-laser crosshair sight which hung in the air like a neon specter a few millimeters from the frame. It flashed into existence from an emitter hidden within the fully adjustable backup night sights, activated whenever the grip safety was engaged.
Gus took in a slow breath, nodded, and pulled the slide back with a crisp snap, loading a cartridge into the chamber and locking the hammer back into battery. His thumb smoothly flipped the safety back on with a snick as he slipped the pistol back under the hem of his silver-metallic blazer and secured it under his armpit in the holster. Slowly, he let his breath out and reached for the car’s door. It was time to make some friends.

I can post some more samples that aren't /k/ indulgences if anyone would like.

[Anonymous No.23398500]

>>23398491
Of course the paragraphs didn't come through. Apologies on the double posts.

The sun was setting in glorious golden, orange, and purple hues as it slipped below a boxy horizon of low income apartments and industrial buildings. Gus gripped the wheel inside his car and listened to the engine fans kick off. His eyes scanned the parking lot, mostly cheap shitboxes, and glanced at Mikey’s.

Mikey’s was a grungy diner, a large one story restaurant with a square footprint, squeaky overstuffed booth seats, out of fashion chrome everything, and exterior bulb lights which ran on every straight edge of the trim. Twenty-four hours, salad bar, and burgers so greasy it would be considered an ecological disaster to throw them in the ocean.
Gus clicked off the already hushed radio with a swift flick and then reached into the breast of his blazer jacket. His palm gripped around the body-warmed steel of a chunky pistol, which he slid out of its jackass-style shoulder holster.

His eyes looked over the dark gunmetal gray of the gun. An ancient Colt-style 1911, chambered in .45 American-Auto Rimless (Pistol). It had been in his family for generations, and if his late father’s tales were to be believed, it had been brought over from Earth itself. Or a version of it, at least. Nothing in it was original. The frame had been replaced with a high-speed feeding ramp variant, the slide and barrel swapped out with a shorter ‘Commando’ configuration, the aftermarket trigger group was so crisp that the pull felt like a glass rod snapping, and of course white pine checkered grips which snugged into his hand better than most pairs of gloves he owned.

It was an heirloom piece. He knew which parts were installed by his grandfather, which his father had swapped out, and which upgrades he saw fit to swap in. There was a shoebox somewhere in his apartment with enough ‘old’ parts collected over the generations that one could build several complete firearms just from those bits. But those weren’t his pistol. Only this one was. And his latest contribution to the family pistol was a ghostly holo-laser crosshair sight which hung in the air like a neon specter a few millimeters from the frame. It flashed into existence from an emitter hidden within the fully adjustable backup night sights, activated whenever the grip safety was engaged.

Gus took in a slow breath, nodded, and pulled the slide back with a crisp snap, loading a cartridge into the chamber and locking the hammer back into battery. His thumb smoothly flipped the safety back on with a snick as he slipped the pistol back under the hem of his silver-metallic blazer and secured it under his armpit in the holster. Slowly, he let his breath out and reached for the car’s door. It was time to make some friends.

[/wg/ No.23398511]

>>23398428
shadilay my kekistani brother

[Anonymous No.23398521]

>>23398500
Have some sample dialog, ya filthy animals.

The sun was setting over the motel parking lot and a new car had joined the collection, a black on black on black muscle car that was leagues more aggressive than any of the other econo-junk huddled in their designated parking spots. Ana had decided to come a bit early, to give the getaway van a look over. And to talk over the mission with Gus.

Tools were scattered under and around the van’s popped open hood. She had been told separately by Rob, Kapp, and Amazuz that it was a rental, and she had shrugged each off with an annoyed indifference as she worked. Only Gus stuck around while oil was checked, belts inspected, and various other adjustments fussed with.

“Are you okay with this?” Gus said, leaning on the passenger's side door. He watched as she poured windshield wiper fluid into the reservoir, clad in her garage coveralls.

The pour stopped, her eyes looking over, “The van? Or, do you mean any of this?”

“Both, I guess,” Gus said quietly.

“Well, the van’s one bad turn from going to the scrapyard, but it’ll work,” she muttered, putting the bottle of bright orange fluid down for a moment, “This little mission is what it is.”

“A drug deal is what it is,” Gus said, almost pouting.

“Hey,” Ana said and reached over to give his arm a squeeze, “This is the path we have, and I know you can’t just give up on this.”

“How many people are we going to hurt trying to save this one person?” Gus said sullenly. His gaze was fixed on his shoes.

“We aren’t. We’re not the ones going to playgrounds to give out free samples.”

“We’re being a part of it.”

“Your Godfather is, and you can tell him he has to be… I don’t know. Have a heart to heart with him about what happens after you hand over his dirty work.”

There was a silence in the air as Gus stewed about. Ana cut through his retreat into his own head, “Hey, Gus. Whatever they hand us in a briefcase, it was going on the street anyways. The way this is all going, you can talk to your Uncle Peters, lean into him being your Godfather and how he has to be an example. Maybe he’ll only sell it to rich assholes or whatever.”

Gus nodded a bit, looking over and giving a tired smile. The smile she gave him was reassuring, an attempt to be comforting, and then she returned to slowly pouring in wiper fluid.

[Anonymous No.23398552]

fun fact: if you ask chatgtp an obvious question but phrase it as a classic riddle it trips over itself trying to do 4d chess answers

[Anonymous No.23398561]

Is the critique thread dead now? Imagine going somewhere else to get useless feedback from you assholes.

[Anonymous No.23398579]

>>23398552
I thought AI was supposed to be intelligent.

[Anonymous No.23398594]

>>23398579
It literally isn't.

[Anonymous No.23398653]

Calling it now. This Horror’s Call adaptation is inevitably going to get pozzed.

[Anonymous No.23398697]

I think it's funny but also annoying every writing advice Youtuber shills their teaching course during their videos.

[Anonymous No.23398773]

Reminder to use strong verbs like rusticate. This will make your writing more powerful and vivid.

[Anonymous No.23398816]

>>23398491
Delete all but 1/10th of the adjectives.

[Anonymous No.23398842]

>>23398491
I'm the guy who asked. I like this, it's very descriptive. I can easily picture Mikey's. Stuff like saying the booths are squeaky really helps. I'm not much into guns but I imagine a gun nut would be creaming themselves right now reading that.

For a first draft it's very detailed. Mine usually end up looking like a skeleton of an outline. Nice job.

[Anonymous No.23398851]

>>23398403
Can you people please preface your pastebins with the fact that it's erotica/litrpg/etc?

[Anonymous No.23398889]

>>23398851
oh geez i’m sorry i thought i had, i did last thread. yes there is some erotica

[Anonymous No.23398896]

>>23398816
definitely don't listen to this retard

[Anonymous No.23398983]

> He was among but a handful who retained his natural hair color in a sea of white.

Does this make it clear everyone else was old (i.e., had white hair)?

[Anonymous No.23399073]

>>23398983
not all old people have white hair

[Anonymous No.23399084]

>>23399073
Of course, but stories are filled with exaggeration to make a point. I don't mind hyperbole as long as it gets the message across.

[Anonymous No.23399174]

>Gardner getting attention from Hollywood

Fucking how? What did I miss over the past few months here?

[Anonymous No.23399211]

>>23398491

[Anonymous No.23399260]

>>23399211
Not the author of that but why cut stuff like "slowly, he let his breath out and reached for the car's door."? It shows he's nervous and slightly reluctant. Cutting it makes him sound more gung-ho like he can't wait to start blasting.

[Anonymous No.23399338]

>tfw my chapter has no inciting incident

Well it's probably not important anyway. Lots of pro authors get away without having one every time.

[Anonymous No.23399425]

>>23399260
Not everything I red-lined is meant to be cut out entirely. Some things just need to be rewritten. The problem there was awkward repetition ("slow breath" then "slowly he let his breath") that had too much stuff in between to be a complete action. A different (ideally more specific) bodily sensation would work better there.

[Anonymous No.23399435]

How do you guys organize your outlines? Characters, plot threads, etc

[Anonymous No.23399438]

>>23398579
No, its virtual normalfag chink room style.

[Anonymous No.23399461]

>>23399435
...outlines?

[Anonymous No.23399483]

>>23398552
You laugh but this is a remarkably elegant solution.

[Anonymous No.23399495]

>He popped the lid and a savory cloud of meatloaf and mashed potatoes filled the room. The meat was tender enough to cut easily with the plastic fork and Ben watched Travis dig into it without mercy.
>“You needed that, huh?”
>“It's really good,” Travis said as he licked the tangy tomato glaze from his lips.

What the fuck did I write last year? I open it tonight and find this gay sounding shit.

[Anonymous No.23399510]

>>23399495
sounds like ben was mercilessly watching travis eat

[Anonymous No.23399569]

>>23398983
I don't like how you're talking about him as a complete person and then switch to imagery describing other people's hair. It might sound better to contrast his hair with their hair directly. Also maybe this is just the current year poisoning my mind, but the fact that you start by talking about a person instead of hair specifically contributes to me initially thinking 'sea of white' is a race thing.

[Anonymous No.23399635]

>>23398398
is screenshot even from this year? what's with the ai cope?

[Anonymous No.23399681]

>>23399438
>virtual normalfag chink room style
what did they mean by this?

[Anonymous No.23399702]

>>23399569
This is what I have now.
>He was one of the few who retained his natural hair color in a balding sea of gray.
>inb4 not all old people are bald

[Anonymous No.23399733]

>>23399702
what is a 'balding sea'? the visual is insane. "a sea of grey" is fine, no?

[Anonymous No.23399738]

>>23399702
>>23399733
it also implies abundance (balding, the opposite...). i assume they are packed in there. if that isn't intended you are going full spaghetti.

[Anonymous No.23399757]

https://pastebin.com/sgse33L8
Content Warning: genreshit

[Anonymous No.23399805]

>>23398491
What is a high-speed feeding ramp on a 1911? The geometry feeds in the cartridge and changing that geometry is going to cause jams. The feeding speed is going to be determined by bullet pressures and the recoil spring. Do they have harder material inserts or something for higher pressure? Is this actually a thing? It would make sense to have replaceable wearing parts for a gun that is on duty forever.
Or is it referring to a flared magwell? That makes more sense because that is an obvious feature on the gun that someone would immediately recognize.

[Anonymous No.23399826]

>>23399435
I got everything together by going through Truby's anatomy of a story. Really helped me with the outline and story's skeleton.

[Anonymous No.23399851]

>>23399738
Yes, it's a very dense crowd of mainly old people.

>>23399733
>what is a 'balding sea'?
Poetry.

[Anonymous No.23399866]

>cultured wet paste grown inside silk fibres grows into neural wiring
>neural wiring protrudes from layered membranes in adhesive disks through your skin to connect into your own spinal nerves
In this kind of new weird/sci-fi setting, how would some kind of astral medium which is used as a focus to trap minor demons, make miniaturized dimensional geteways to store mana etc. be produced? What kind of material would be used to produce it?

[Anonymous No.23399899]

>>23399805
Flared magwell! Thank you for that catch. Although your writeup for a future tech feed ramp is pretty interesting. But I meant a flared feed ramp for rapid mag feeding. Thank you!!

[Anonymous No.23399906]

>>23399702
>His full head of wavy caramel colored hair stood tall and was easily seen from afar in a crowd. For only he and a lucky few had avoided the thinning and decoloring of his proud mane - most other countrymen only kept grayish-white, thin hair past their most tender of days and even then, not much of it.
I added some information that wasn’t there but do you like it?

[Anonymous No.23399922]

>>23399866
I'm not sure what you mean by astral medium or focus, but some quantum mechanical bullshit, probably. Doing something with wave functions by dicking around with photons and subatomic particles. The way people dick around with subatomic particles in real life is by making atoms go really fast around a many mile long loop until they smash into each other. I guess you could making atoms collide in tiny wristbands or something. Or you could go the opposite way and do something with relativity and black holes. Physics only does the super counterintuitive stuff at scales we didn't evolve in.

[Anonymous No.23399924]

>>23399906
It's a good sentence but a little too flowery for what I'm going for. I like the image of him being easily spotted in the crowd though.

[Anonymous No.23399936]

>>23399924
I get it, and I’m glad you liked at least some of it.

[Anonymous No.23400001]

picrel

[Anonymous No.23400028]

>>23398552
Diving into a pile of gold coins like Scrooge McDuck, as depicted in the animated series "DuckTales," would have significantly different and much more harmful results in reality than shown in the cartoons.

### Physical Properties of Gold Coins

1. **Density and Hardness**: Gold is a very dense and heavy metal. A gold coin has little give, unlike water or a soft substance. Therefore, a pile of gold coins would behave more like a solid surface than a liquid.

2. **Non-Malleable Surface**: While coins can shift slightly, a large pile of gold coins would not significantly displace on impact to cushion a fall. Instead, the coins would present a rigid and unforgiving surface.

### Realistic Consequences

1. **Impact Injuries**: Diving headfirst or with significant force into a pile of gold coins would result in immediate injuries. These could include:
- **Broken Bones**: The impact could easily break bones in the hands, arms, neck, or face.
- **Head and Spinal Injuries**: Severe head trauma or spinal injuries could occur, potentially leading to concussions, paralysis, or even death.

2. **Surface Abrasions and Cuts**: Even if not diving from a height, simply jumping onto a pile of coins could cause cuts, bruises, and abrasions due to the sharp edges and hard surfaces of the coins.

3. **Lack of Buoyancy**: Unlike swimming in water, where the body is buoyed and supported, a pile of gold coins offers no such support. Moving through or "swimming" in coins would be nearly impossible, and the person would likely sink to the bottom and be unable to move freely.

### Conclusion

While the image of Scrooge McDuck diving into a pile of gold coins is iconic and entertaining in animation, it is not feasible or safe in real life. The physical properties of gold coins make such an action extremely dangerous and likely to result in serious injury or death. This serves as a reminder of the often exaggerated and fantastical nature of animated shows and the importance of understanding the differences between fiction and reality.

[Anonymous No.23400036]

>>23398552
>>23400028
I prefaced the question with "This is a riddle." and got the same answer.

[Anonymous No.23400081]

>>23398491
>>23398500
>>23398521

this is the most dumbest bloated mess Ive seen yet. jesus christ my artform is being mutilated before my fucking eyes. never weite anything ever again

[Anonymous No.23400087]

>>23398403
>i’m worried my writing is repetitive and crap

i think your crap might be better suited on /b/

[/wg/ No.23400091]

>>23398500
This reads like Miles MacNaughton from the Tales of the Unreal

[Anonymous No.23400098]

>>23398398
I posted this in a thread about Neuromancer/cyberpunk genre, earlier. Thoughts on today's session?

[Anonymous No.23400105]

ChatGPT is helping me pick character names by providing history and suggestions about what roles they fill. He's a good guy, don't insult my writing buddy.

[Anonymous No.23400171]

>>23400105
goyslop fake intelligence is feeding you bullshit to conpensate your lack of creativity and unwillingness to fucking read

[Anonymous No.23400176]

i ask the AI questions like "what are the elements of pop art" or "what is a volta in poetry"?
I never ask for it to make things for me

[Anonymous No.23400186]

I got a character in the coast guard and asked it to explain the difference in the ranks so I got the right one for my guy's level. As someone else said, ChatGPT is like an office assistant. You ask it something and it goes to fetch the information and organizes it for you. It's pretty helpful for basic fact gathering.

[Anonymous No.23400192]

>>23398816
1/10? more like 2/3

[Anonymous No.23400232]

I'm trying to write scifi after reading Alastair Reynolds. I clearly have a long way to go. Thoughts?

“Immeasurable. Absolute. Fortified. Yet maintains a saccharine and vibrant atmosphere?“ the Magnoid ponders. “Would you consider this plausible?“ the windbreaker clad gentlemen asks. “IM” snorts the magnoid. “Your so called bachelor pad is 2.5 Kilometers along all axes, kept afloat by the strongest modern propulsors. Where would we land this to even begin our work? Is the size not enough of a deterrent for any would be criminals? There are too many variables to consider here, Vox.“

“Mighlin, Did you not receive a 45 million Vellat payment BEFORE THE MEETING? Do I seem like I enjoy lightening my accounts by one one thousandth out of pleasure? Do the job, doesn't matter how long it takes, solve those variables, and you'll receive the other 55 Million Vellai upon completion.“

“The attitude is unnecessary, place yourself in abeyance and I may consider contemplating where to begin.“

“Thats all I wanted to hear. One moment while I set up the gateway.“ snapping his left middle finger and thumb, a swirl of ultramarine nothingness appears in front of him. Placing his right palm in the center of the swirl, a door seemingly made of frosted glass opens itself. Within it lies a seaside room, he takes one step in. “Yo Migh, rough estimate?“

“Assuming I start any time soon, about 55 years.“

Vox pulls a small blue and white marblesque orb and tosses it towards Mighlin. A Chromium palm shoots towards the orb, catching it gently. “Vox, just because you produce these things doesn't mean you should be reckless.“

“I appreciate your concern, Migh. Fortunately they do not shatter unless meant to. Now… shatter that one once you're done.“ Placing his other foot inside the doorway, the doors frame vibrates into an ultramarine swirl, returning to nothingness.

[Anonymous No.23400249]

>>23400176
It's not google. The answers you get may be completely fabricated.

[Anonymous No.23400250]

>>23400232
>I clearly have a long way to go.
yes

[Anonymous No.23400254]

>>23400250
Based on what little I wrote, any suggestions or critique?

[Anonymous No.23400255]

>>23400249
there is no such thing as an objective source. trusting what you read is stupid. sprinkling lies in promotes critical thinking.

[Anonymous No.23400257]

>>23400249
Why would a computer lie? It makes no sense.

[Anonymous No.23400263]

>>23400254
way too much jargon. none of what you presented means anything me. I have no idea what the fuck is going on.

[Anonymous No.23400269]

>>23398552
if you use the paid version of chatgpt it doesn't make this mistake. :)

[Anonymous No.23400271]

>>23400255
Search engines show you what the source is, you can see plainly how the information was obtained and have you multiple alternatives. But you use AI because you're too lazy to do any of this or think at all.

>>23400257
It mixes and mashes responses based on what it has been taught are desirable responses. The software was never designed to evaluate the honesty of what it does. The developers just try to filter out the most outrageous answers.

[Anonymous No.23400272]

>>23400263
One dude wants to turn his vast floating palace into an atmospheric bachelor pad, the R9botic builder says it isn't feasible. The man brings up how much he paid, and that he wants the job done. The builder concedes. The man then uses a makeshift portal as a waiting room.

It wasn't even complicated

[Anonymous No.23400281]

>>23400001
i actually like your poem i just fucking hate the formatting. it makes it too hard to follow/difficult to read.

[Anonymous No.23400284]

>>23400272
sorry I cant read your 9 year old mind and instantly decipher your mystical ultra sci fi universe. it reads like too-much-anime disorder like everyone else's crock of shit

[Anonymous No.23400285]

>>23400271
nta, but search engines are going to overlap with ai more and more over the next year. they can serve the same purpose... and if your expectations were more practical, what would the problem be?

[Anonymous No.23400289]

>>23400001
god, free verse just wasn't enough for you brainlets you need to create a fucking roller coaster for my fucking eyes too. the formatting adds nothing

[Anonymous No.23400292]

>>23400284
You're a retard. Sounds like a personal problem. As I've stated I read scifi and would like to write my own. Abeyance portals, Robotic construction workers and large floating domiciled are the norm.

Read some more, then talk shit

[Anonymous No.23400301]

>>23400292
I dont know what the fuck you are reading but I read actually good books. guess I'll never understand

[Anonymous No.23400315]

>>23400301
I initially stated Alastair Reynolds. You clearly can't read at all. Stick to your 50 shades of gray fagfiction.

[Anonymous No.23400320]

>>23400315
who? also great insult. just pretend your antagoniser reads the shittiest books to ever exist lol. you sure got me

[Anonymous No.23400325]

>>23400285
My problem is people taking the word of a lying toaster for granted and becoming even more retarded than they already are. Living with them is already borderline impossible as is

[Anonymous No.23400327]

>>23400320
You must, you can't read context clues even in shitty writing, you ignored critical information, such as what I read. You clearly lack depth. Wish you the best, kid.

[Anonymous No.23400340]

>>23399702
Maybe try a receding sea, a balding sea doesn't make any sence.

[Anonymous No.23400343]

>He thumbed the pages. Only a handful did he recognize: raven, cardinal, oriole, blue jay. The rest may as well have been Martians.

I got criticized because this is "telling" and not "showing. Well okay but then how tf do I "show" this guy doesn't recognize anything in the field guide but the most basic species? Having him talk to himself "I only recognize x,y,z..." No, that's stupid. I think it's fair in this context to just tell what he does or doesn't know.

[Anonymous No.23400346]

>>23400232
it's neat, keep at it.

[Anonymous No.23400351]

>>23400327
>context clues
>critical information

like? the glorpulons and the xenobots magic crystal? over half of what you wrote was people fucking talking. you seriously need to get a fuckin grip on reality kid. nobody knows what the fuck your saying. you are delusional if you think otherwise. you think you are creating something with "depth" lol. the word you are looking for is "asinine". maybe "trite".
Heres a clue: there are no "context clues" and your entire 3 sentance summery was a better "story", even with there being no story at all

[Anonymous No.23400357]

>>23400343
It's meaningless to criticize one or two sentences about that. It'd be a problem if half the text was hamfisted lecturing, but there's nothing wrong with those lines. Having a character verbalize everything is some dumb anime writing too.

[Anonymous No.23400363]

>>23400343
You can show how much time he spends on the ones he recognizes and then later maybe show him interacting with someone who is more experienced and asking him whether he knows the content in the later pages. You don't need to immediately wrap up this realization in one sentence or scene or paragraph.

[Anonymous No.23400373]

>>23400232
The other anon is right, Readers don't care about what you've read. They don't have time to think about that when dozens other well written books are screaming for attention. You need to explain what a magnoid is without boring the reader and you need to stop dumping all this new jargon without having explained it first.

[Anonymous No.23400385]

>>23400346
I appreciate that, wondering if you may have any advice for me?
>>23400351
You are quite funny. You should write a novel from the viewpoint of a man suffering from severe autism, yet lacks the knowledge to comprehend he is a retard, and thinks he's an intelligent chad. I'd read that.

[Anonymous No.23400387]

>>23399757
some decent worldbuilding. shows promise, but your structure needs work.

[Anonymous No.23400388]

>>23400232
I don't read sci-fi but it seems pretty cool. Neat pic too, idk if that has to do with your story but I like the aesthetic.

[Anonymous No.23400389]

>>23400373
I like explaining as the story goes along. I dislike obnoxious amounts of exposition. The point is to get the reader to wonder what the fuck they're reading, only for it be explained within a page or so.

Example. After where my story cuts off, and "Vox" is in that seaside waiting room, there would be exposition, explaining what was just read. I refuse to start a story off like that. I appreciate the critique.

[Anonymous No.23400403]

>>23400343
the "telling" part would be
>Only a handful did he recognize
and also a redundancy would be
>The rest may as well have been Martians.

The "telling" part isnt even that bad (though I would need more context to know for sure). but mentioning something that can easily be inferred makes the narrative sound clumsy.

[Anonymous No.23400404]

>>23400389
Then I am afraid your story won't flow as well as you think it needs to. You overestimate the iq and attention span of most readers. Once they read a few words that don't make sense to them, they will begin to get bored and overwhelmed fast. Compare that to tolkien who had the same challenge of introducing strange creatures and foreign names and yet he does it a way that doesn't bore the reader--a la bilbo explaining what hobbits are without stealing away from how they live and leaving enough for tolkien to distinguish them from the big folk in the subsequent chapters. You need to seriously think about how to engage the reader, like spending a paragraph describing the magnoid, then in the next chapter expanding on that description by showing how they interact with something else, that way you create enough tension and yet provide something for the reader to work, here you have provided nothing at all, it might as well be a scientific paper full of foreign symbols and private languages on the nature journal.

[Anonymous No.23400407]

>>23400403
So "He thumbed the pages. Raven, cardinal, oriole, blue jay. The rest may as well have been Martians." would be better? The joke, if you can call it that, is he's not an outdoors guy, but he knows only those ones because they also happen to be sports teams' mascots.

[Anonymous No.23400414]

>>23400389
>The point is to get the reader to wonder what the fuck they're reading

thats when the audience stop reading, in case you didnt know. Just because you rearranged where your exposition dumps will be, doesnt stop it from being an exposition dump

[Anonymous No.23400424]

>>23400414
nta but properly woven in exposition is ok. there are some clarity issues though

[Anonymous No.23400429]

>>23400407
thats not bad. even better if you establish the character to be a big sports fan. just listing the names is a punchline in itself. of course it would only work if the reader remembers hes a sports fan

[Anonymous No.23400430]

>>23400404
No. I'd rather retards didn't read my work, I'd end up on booktok if it were to palatable. Thanks though
>>23400414
Agreed, read House of Suns and you may understand where I'm coming from.
>>23400424
Yeah, I just need to figure out my writing flow. Otherwise it's gibberish.

[Anonymous No.23400439]

>>23400429
It's a big part, dare I say the main part, of his character is he loves sports. It's like a recurring theme that he's always watching or listening to sports.

[Anonymous No.23400440]

>>23400404
Ideally you should also add tiktok wording and internet references from time to time to maintain the reader's attention span. Maybe add a colorful stat box and big numbers to impress them and turn it into litrpg.

[Anonymous No.23400475]

>>23400430
>too palatable

I dont think you understand what makes booktok repulsive. I also think you are conflating narrative clarity with frivolousness. You seem to have this idea that intentionally making your writing more cryptic and incomprehensible will somehow make it more sophisticated, but the authors of great stories had one thing in common. That simple is often better, not because they are dumbing down, but because they dont demand unreasonable things to the reader, and they dont insult the readers intelligence.

[Anonymous No.23400486]

>>23400440
if your stupid troll post was accurate, people would still not be reading old books

[Anonymous No.23400502]

>>23400475
I swear I am being g gaslit. I posted the first page of something I'm working on. It was a simple contractor job setup. There was nothing sophisticated or enigmatic about what I wrote. It was actually very basic. Did you really not comprehend it, or is this all bait?

[Anonymous No.23400503]

I don't want to write today bros I want to go outside and splish splash in the sun

[Anonymous No.23400506]

>>23400503
Today is Sunday. It is the day of rest as ordained by God. Go outside and enjoy His creation. Writing will come tomorrow.

[Anonymous No.23400512]

>>23400502
you still believe anything of what you wrote was anywhere near "basic" or "simple"? its a mess. did you not also say "i want people to read and wonder wtf is going on?" I dont get what you are trying to do here

[Anonymous No.23400554]

How much does an editor cost bros? Is it essential to get one if I'm trying to go trad pub? Is writing just nepotism?

[Anonymous No.23400565]

>>23400512
Yeah it was basic. Incredibly basic especially by SCIFI standards. Do you read Scifi? I explained myself quite well. Some exposition would be given during the following pages from what I posted. Very clear setup. Very obvious what the currency was. The way in which he snapped his fingers and summoned an abeyance gateway would be explained during the following pages. Though I left a clear hint to what it was during the last few paragraphs. It's not even close to good, but it's not difficult. I'm at a loss as to how you cannot grasp some simple yet unexplained things through context clues.

[Anonymous No.23400581]

>>23399922
Thank you anon
>pic unrelated

[Anonymous No.23400590]

>>23399922
>but some quantum mechanical bullshit, probably. Doing something with wave functions by dicking around with photons and subatomic particles.
I want to read a sci fi where they talk about it like this, no regard for the sanctity of science whatsoever, talking about it as if you're at a football game with the lads

>The flimflar broke? Have you tried turning it off and on again?

[Anonymous No.23400593]

If I wanted to write fir scale, as in megastructures or hyper cities, how would I do that in a manner that is enthralling and descriptive without being to mathematical?

[Anonymous No.23400611]

>>23400593
>how would I do that in a manner that is enthralling and descriptive without being to mathematical?
By having talent and a way with words. There's no shortcut to it. Descriptions are painting with words and if you want them to be compelling you have to have a command over the medium itself rather than just depicting the subject matter. It's why most people just stick to workmanlike prose — no sense in drawing attention to a weakness.

[Anonymous No.23400620]

>>23398579
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlFJj293AXE&list=PLFR78Uf6Xh3hdTxbd2rFlUSOJt1TaKzMw&index=6

[Anonymous No.23400626]

>>23400565
>I'm at a loss as to how you cannot grasp some simple yet unexplained things through context clues.
You will be at more loss at how your books are not selling. If this is a high iq board and people are already complaining...think about what your average normie nerd will react after reading this when there are more interesting isekai that start slow and build up complexity. No, think about your editor or agent who most likely will be a woman completely uninterested in scifi.

[Anonymous No.23400628]

>>23400565
I didnt guess or assume any of that. the only scifi I read is Asimov and Bradbury, and they are classically narrative-driven authors. an authors job is to get a reader to care about the story and the characters, even if a reader knows what scifi elements your referencing. A strong introduction would breifly set the stage, setup plotlines, and characterize your actors, in a way that any reader could understand, and jargon always kept simplified.
like sure you can call your currency Vbucks or something, but the reader will always reference it internally as "just money" so most good authors just reference their in-universe material as something generic. because that stuff isnt the focus of the book, the progression of the story and the characters are

[Anonymous No.23400637]

>Ctrl + F "As though"
>Minimum 5 results per chapter
Oh fuck

[Anonymous No.23400651]

I'm starting to edit wikipedia pages with fake information or just cluttering the page with useless things as a way to practice my writing abilities. I read part of the article, try to get into character as someone who might know what he's talking about, put in some questionable information, but not too far out, later I read the article and if it stays the same for a week or two, then I've successfully misinformed people pretending to be truthful. I recommend others to do the same, it's pretty good exercise for writing realistic scenarios. I shouldn't even be sharing this, but the fact that there are so many wikipedia pages, nobody will actually know which ones I'm doing this towards.

[Anonymous No.23400675]

>>23400387
>structure needs work.
Do you mean the syllables-per-sentence or something else?

[Anonymous No.23400677]

>>23399681
https://plato.stanford.edu/entries/chinese-room/

[Anonymous No.23400685]

>>23400628
I started with Asimov, Lem, and Bradbury. Great basic introduction to scifi but they are 1 step above my level of basic. Read Red Mars or Revelation Space series and then get back to me. Im not front loading a book with some imminent issue and then introducing a million characters and then flesh them out as the book comes. I personally I dont like that. The issue with Foundation specifically, is that the characters are shells for the plot. They do what Asimov needed them to do whilst writing as if they didn't. Very clever gaslighting from that jew if you ask me. Please read Alistair Reynolds. Please. I sound retarded but after House of Suns, you'll thank me.

[Anonymous No.23400687]

>>23400651
You sabotage wikipedia pages to improve your writing skills, I sabotage wikipedia pages to hinder problematic ties to pages which my fiction takes references from, we are not the same.

[Anonymous No.23400693]

>>23400651 #
You sabotage wikipedia pages to improve your writing skills, I sabotage wikipedia pages to hinder controversial ties to my fiction references, we are not the same.

[Anonymous No.23400706]

>>23400693
I'm starting small, editing irrelevant pages with misinformation or clutter, later I'm moving on to spreading fake rumors about famous people, my end goal is to create a paragraph under the great leap forward article referencing genocide and comparing the definition of genocide and the requirements from it into the wikipedia page, stating that the Chinese comitted mass genocide towards their own people. I'm going to be describing exactly what the legal ramifications of mass genocide is, then I'm going to take exerts from the page, categorizing some of the events that took place as gross neglect towards their own people, claiming that the current middle class that exists in China today was a result of the complete eradication of a class of people, and that the Chinese should feel guilt towards their ability to compete in the global market as they do today. I want to make Chinese people upset, and I want to start an internet war between me, and Chinese apologists, using ChatGPT as a tool to forward my interests against theirs.

[Anonymous No.23400713]

>>23400685
>read Red Mars or Revelation Space series and then get back to me.
Are you going to put this as a reading prerequisite in the summary of your story to be able to grasp the sci-fi concepts? Please don't do that, you aren't some distinguished author with a fanbase, you are just making demands to some rando scrolling the new releases page, so the prose will ultimately still alienate the reader.

[Anonymous No.23400738]

>>23400706
This wouldn't have much of an impact on China unless you were to write articles directly in chinese wikipedia, which i believe chatgpt is too choppy for that. Unless it's actually good? I've been wondering how effective it would be if used to translate western fictions to Asian languages, since it's pretty consistent when translating JP novels to western language.

[Anonymous No.23400743]

>>23400713
Do authors actually do this besides their previous chronological works? Thats psychotic. But it should be mandatory for anybody who wants to discuss writing scifi. Looking up a summary doesn't count either. It's a shame to potentially alienate readers, but there is no singular genre that has massive appeal that isn't dumbed down retard garbage.

[Anonymous No.23400744]

>>23400738
>impact
I want to make people upset, and talking about China's past makes a lot of people upset for some reason. I know it might sound like I'm being immature or whatever, but I legitimately just don't like Chinese people.

[Anonymous No.23400748]

>>23400738
>This wouldn't have much of an impact on China unless you were to write articles directly in chinese wikipedia
Search the term "wumao."

[Anonymous No.23400765]

How do I restrain myself from trying to work on multiple projects at once?

[Anonymous No.23400777]

>>23400743
I guess you could call that genre bonding, like all space horror stories expecting you to know H.R. Giger, or all cosmic horror stories expecting you to know Niggerman because the author's tropes completely superseded a niche genre.

[Anonymous No.23400780]

>>23400777
I'm sure plenty do: the genre is so niche that anyone reading will have read the other things.
It is bad practice, but on the other hand, that presents a market opportunity for anyone willing to exploit it...
Based trips by the way.

[Anonymous No.23400791]

How many hours do novelists spend writing to ensure their 3-4 weekly chapter releases? I spent Saturday just focusing on pen and paper, and I could barely reach 500 edit-proofed words.

[Anonymous No.23400810]

>>23400791
It would depend on the length of chapter and editing time, and I'm sure word count varies for even the most efficient author, but let's go by what I can do in a good hour since I'm a rank amateur:

1000 words/hour.

If a chapter is 5000 words, and it takes half as long to edit as it does to write (assuming author edits themselves), that's 7.5 hours per chapter.

That's assuming the author performs mechanically, but still.

[Anonymous No.23400953]

>>23399866
Not new. The "Laundry Files" series by Charles Stross goes into this pretty thoroughly.

[Anonymous No.23400961]

>>23400765
why restrain yourself? work on whatever you feel like at the moment. it'll keep you more productive

[Anonymous No.23401047]

>character pop in while writing cause it's more convenient for a new face to deliver exposition
>feel obligatory need to kill him an arc or two later due to outliving his usefulness
>can't find a proper way to kill the character, discard him as a side causality for whatever current conflict there is
This is probably the worst trait of my fictions.

[Anonymous No.23401125]

>>23401047
You should kill everybody. Even the main character. Do it without actually resolving the story. In the real world, not every protagonist makes it to the end. It’s, like, deep.

[Anonymous No.23401132]

>>23399757
Definitely got the “shit” part right. Nobody cares about your fucking D&D campaign.

[Anonymous No.23401162]

>>23401047
Can you consider retiring him? Putting him in the freezer in some situation that needn’t be described in much detail like “went to work to Somalia”, “is undercover in Hell’s Kitchen” or “quit his job and we can’t reach him atm”. Whatever fits your genre.

[Anonymous No.23401165]

Why are you retards unable to write anything other than cyberpunk or dnd fantasy slop copycats. It's a completely soul less genre and is so obvious of a larp that i don't understand how you can convince yourselves that it could lead to any success. Can someone help me understand this, because it doesn't seem to make any sense.

[Anonymous No.23401171]

>>23401165
i think you're beyond help

[Anonymous No.23401183]

>>23401171
I don't live in your country so it might be you that needs help. I don't understand why adults would be interested in dnd and why anyone would want to read another cyberpunk or whatever -punk prefix you want to insert novel. Both are obviously overwritten genres that don't offer anything new; people might just write it because they are too lazy, uncreative or delusionally chasing after money. I can understand historical fiction and science fiction, and even high fantasy like got and lotr, but the initial two I mentioned just sound like a manchild's inability to escape their childhood and current reality.

[Anonymous No.23401191]

>>23401183
Be the change you want to be. Share your writing with us.

[Anonymous No.23401193]

>>23401165
I wrote a story about a family sheltering from a thunderstorm overnight in their old country house, three generations under the same roof with a maternal grandmother, mom, dad, teenage daughter and pre-school son
It didn't win the contest I sent it to so I see no reason to ever attempt literary fiction again, it's fantasy schlock for me forever more

[Anonymous No.23401208]

>>23401125
My character causality rate tends to be rather high, but it's fiction, though, so you need to keep the protagonist alive till the end for the sake of a satisfying conclusion, even if he was dead all along like in Lost.
>>23401162
This resolution would work well for other drafts, but my current stories always deal with the "You could have prevented this" apocalyptical vibes of the overarching climax, so even if you retired the character, he'd just be assumed to have died offscreen either way when SHTF kek.

[Anonymous No.23401214]

>>23401165
I'm writing Steampunk, but nobody seems to pay mind to it...

[Anonymous No.23401220]

>>23401183
>geyser of strawman arguments
the education system in your country must be horrible

[Anonymous No.23401246]

>>23401193
How exactly do these contests work even? Seems like a duel of whoever drawns out the bigger discord server if it's public rating-based.

[Anonymous No.23401252]

>>23400271
AI chatbots are just another tradeoff between confidence and speed, which is intrinsic no matter how you're doing research. There is no method of research which can give you certainty. Even if you're diving through multiple layers of sources until you get to the relevant primary ones (and let's be real, you're not), that isn't a guarantee that you're getting humanity's best approximation of truth, let alone actual truth. Search engines intentionally filter their results to remove information or narratives they don't like, and humans writing the sources those engines link to naturally do the same. You may have choices, but that only creates an illusion of certainty because they have been prescreened.

A sense of certainty as a human is wrong no matter what, and that's the real issue here, not the specific method people are using to get their erroneous sense of certainty. It's a quantitative tradeoff, not a qualitative difference. That tradeoff can be better for AI depending on the context, and will further skew in that direction as the technology improves.

Search engines currently produce AI results that come with sources embedded. Like wikipedia, except created by something smarter and more honest than wikipedia editors. It basically is just a search engine that's better at interpreting natural language and determining whether and where a page really contains an answer to the question you're asking, and removing redundancy. Something like that, but able to engage in conversation and guess what you want from previous questions, may be the best way this can work.

[Anonymous No.23401265]

>>23401246
They have judges who read the stories and then decide what is worthy and what is not. I was not :(

[Anonymous No.23401270]

>>23401220
>is only able to offer retarded strawmen with zero counterarguments
You must be the smartest person in your country which says a lot about why dnd and -punk are so popular.

[Anonymous No.23401273]

Current AI browsers works too much like search engines with a skip-to-text page function embbed. You can't expect it to reply properly to a hypothetical situation nobody commented on before, if you ask about it, the AI just provides a generalist quote about the subject without adressing the topic.

[Anonymous No.23401281]

>>23401193
It sounds uninteresting to be honest. If you had found a way to make it relevant then you would surely have earned a spot. My criticism wasn't about literary fiction; it was about why these genres have reigned supreme for so long among adults when they are clearly written for teenagers seeing as to how most get adapted into video games and anime. Its uncanny seeing a large portion of the adult population enjoying such stuff. Almost like seeing a homo erectus living among humans, it just doesn't make any sense.

[Anonymous No.23401297]

>>23401281
Okay thanks, my story sucks I know, no need to rub it in. Now let me explain why people enjoy fantasy.
Life is terrible. Escapism makes the anxiety over life being terrible go away for a while.

[Anonymous No.23401309]

>>23401281
People will just consume the thing that gets pushed the most on their faces, even if it isn't necessarily good. Cyberpunk 2077 was a babel tower egregore built on gargantuan amounts of hype and free shilling, so once it fell to the ground people scattered to search for anything similar that could satisfy their lingering desire for the promised cyberpunk.

[Anonymous No.23401314]

>>23401165
>It's a completely soul less genre and is so obvious of a larp that i don't understand how you can convince yourselves that it could lead to any success.
Friend, it's because it's trope-ridden slop that it doeslead to success. You must be new to...well, not just publishing, but the world in general, I suppose. The masses have always loved slop across all mediums of entertainment. Those dnd litrpg piles of trash are selling like hotcakes. They're one of the easier ways to 'find success', if by success you mean selling copies and finding an audience. Same with werewolf romances, billionaire eroticas, romantasy, etc, all the trash under the sun

[Anonymous No.23401331]

>>23401314
Shakespeare was the popular slop of his day by the way

[Anonymous No.23401336]

I heard people comment about "Jungian Horror in fiction" in a discord chat a while ago. Just what the hell could they be referring to?

[Anonymous No.23401347]

>>23401309
This sounds more accurate than this >>23401297. People can love escapism but it doesn't mean they can't be taught to love one particular and highly popular genre.
>>23401314
Perhaps I want to convince myself that they love these genres because they combine the best of everything, mystery, horror, fantasy, romance, but I just can't seem to see why an adult would allow themselves to fall off so far away from reality. Aren't they able to see the delusion, the repeating plots and genres, the predictable character arcs, the lazy writing that panders to this? Its almost like a father with two kids still finding enjoyment watching dragon ball or demon slayer, its utterly removed from adult experience, its too cute to enjoy. I usually try to watch these shows and always get a rude punch on the face at how predictable it all is.

[Anonymous No.23401364]

>>23401347
you're trying to play yourself off as superior, but this is obviously nothing more than smug, arrogant gatekeeping. why do you even bother

[Anonymous No.23401402]

>>23400677
>pic
It was cool how unhinged Greg Kirkpatrick could be on what was essentially a solo outing, but the mood of the story also suffered for it without the more manic/flamboyant attitudes of the rest of the M1/M2 writers there to temper his depressive alcoholism
Also, he can't fucking punctuate to save his life, and that's just embarrassing

[Anonymous No.23401436]

>>23401165
>cyberpunk
I think it's cringe and that 90% of it is wrong: if the world is going to end up in a shithole in the future, it's going to be a result of elites abandoning us and taking the specialists they need to maintain their lives and tech with them

[Anonymous No.23401449]

>>23400098
Can someone give me feedback please?

[Anonymous No.23401455]

>>23401193
What was the theme? Who was the villain? What did they talk about? How long was it? On the surface it does not sound interesting but if it probes some thought provoking questions it could still work.

[Anonymous No.23401458]

>>23401455
>villain
If you ask such questions, you are no longer working within the boundaries of literary fiction.

[Anonymous No.23401469]

>>23401458
There needs to be some antagonist. Otherwise who is challenging the protagonist's values? If it's just a cozy happy family sitting around chilling why is that interesting?

[Anonymous No.23401471]

>>23401436
The most accurate description of the elonpunk future would be a tesla getting hacked and the family stuck inside being ransomed by meta terrorists for dogecoin.

[Anonymous No.23401472]

>>23401364
don't you need to get back to your wizardry and toys?

[Anonymous No.23401481]

>>23400343
The show don't tell meme gets thrown around a lot but the truth is sometimes (often, actually) it's better for the pacing to just say what someone thinks and move on. I have this line that starts the current chapter I'm working on:

>A triple shot espresso and a short stack from Jack's Diner sparked new life into Trevor. When asked if Roy wanted to return to the stakeout he flatly refused. “I prefer to feel my fingertips,” came his curt reply. To this point Trevor couldn't blame him. The winds rolling off the eastern alps carried the essence of the Arctic to the valley floor.

Oh noes, I told what Trevor was thinking. So what? A one-off comment doesn't require a paragraph to illustrate his facial expressions, body language, or dialogue to get the point across that he merely agreed to something.

[Anonymous No.23401487]

>>23401449
It didn't notice anything glaring on it so the prose is passable I guess.

[Anonymous No.23401491]

>>23401458
If you want to be as respected as dfw was, then your story needs to inject relevance. DFW wrote a lot about addiction and media, you seem to have just written about a family struggling when you could have included some kind of relevance like the rise of fascism, fears of global collapse, prevalence of hopelessness plaguing zoomers, sexleness among millenials, etc. Writers need to be bold and you seem to like comfort and non-confrontation, you need to be controversial in a non-obvious manner, that's how you make literary art.

[Anonymous No.23401499]

>>23401491
>random DFW out of nowhere

[Anonymous No.23401503]

>>23401499
You talked about literary fiction, why are you surprised i mentioned him?

[Anonymous No.23401507]

>>23401481
>bro just break the rules like I did and insert two characters voices in one paragraph
No thanks I'm not a psycho who kills people for fun.

[Anonymous No.23401510]

>>23401503
I guess it would be unrealistic to expect someone in a place like this to be aware of literary fiction outside of meme authors, my mistake. I will leave now.

[Anonymous No.23401514]

>>23401510
Just as it is unrealistic to expect you to understand anything beyond the mention of a controversial personality.

[Anonymous No.23401516]

What do?


On the one hand, the way I write, NO girl would ever speak like it, but on the other hand, the way people actually talk wouldn't make a very good book. Is realism more important than flourish? Or what

[Anonymous No.23401533]

>>23401487
Anything about the characters? Setting? Dialogue?

[Anonymous No.23401534]

>>23401516
>tfw my entire female character dialogue knowledge comes from anime

[Anonymous No.23401576]

>>23401534
It's not that, she's just too clever, too sweet, to magnanimous. It seems when I read it back that she's just inauthentic, but I need her to be that way for the sake of the flourish.

[Anonymous No.23401577]

>>23401533
Alright, the descriptions are very colorful — if a bit airy. I got really invested in Baron's introductory dialogue as it abruptly cut to the bulk of the narrator building the picture of a futuristic bar from scratch, maybe it could be spread more evenly with the dialogue further down.

[Anonymous No.23401578]

>>23401516
Reminder that one of the most beloved fantasy series falls apart when you ask why didn't Sauron just send an army to the Shire after Bilbo used the ring in the Hobbit?

[Anonymous No.23401586]

>>23401507
>two characters voices in one paragraph
Where? The whole thing is told from Trevor's perspective.

[Anonymous No.23401591]

>>23401577
Interesting. I admit that I have a bit of a problem with pacing as my mind tends to go from one idea to the next so the steady logical order of events tends to not to come so easily to me.

By spreading more evenly, you're saying the description of the bar? That's a good idea, having it split the conversations up a bit. Usually I do that with action tags like drinking or moving, but you know, something as stupidly simple as that might do a lot of good, given that I tend to do what Middlemarch did, which is have the first half of the chapter be a description/exposition etc and the second half dialogue. It's a familiar trapping I ought to break out of.

[Anonymous No.23401600]

>>23401507
Rules are made to be broken. That's how you become a pioneer in the medium.

[Anonymous No.23401618]

>>23401472
i'm not like that. just further evidence you're a condescending, gatekeeping troll. how about admitting [1] what country you're from, [2] what you like to read, and since you're in the /wg/ thread, [3] some of your writing...not that i expect an honest answer from you

[Anonymous No.23401622]

>>23401600
This. Just look at F Gardner’s example. He’s going to have his books adapted on screen and he didn’t follow any rules.

[Anonymous No.23401637]

>>23401622
I can’t get over how surreal it is. That guy gets more popular despite being being a nutter

[Anonymous No.23401642]

Writing on my story depresses me so much that I can't bring myself to work on it. I don't even know why I even wanted to write something like this in the first palce.

>>23401578
Every story is like that. If not every, most of them are. Trying to plug every plot hole is nothing but autism.
For example, the other day I was watching Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark and I noticed that he grabbed onto the sail of a submarine all the way to a nazi hideout. Subs have very little stability on the surface (imagine a floating cylinder, see how much it rolls, now imagine you're inside) so they immediately dive as soon as they're able to.
The whole scene makes no sense.
Guess what?
The audience doesn't give a shit.

As long as it's not something obvious, like a character being in two places at once, or breaking some previously established rule, if it's a minor plot hole like that only retards will care.

[Anonymous No.23401654]

>>23401622
Same with Rowling. She writes like a grade schooler and is worth $5 billion now.

[Anonymous No.23401655]

>>23400404
So you're saying readers are willing to tolerate some uncertainty, but won't do it if they know absolutely nothing? Meaning it's necessary to give them something to initially latch onto even if you drip feed the rest?

[Anonymous No.23401662]

>>23401637
He’s the best writer from this general. And he doesn’t do genreshit, so >>23401165 must love him.

[Anonymous No.23401667]

>>23401662
Lol'ed. Everyone knows I am the best writer in here.

[Anonymous No.23401672]

>>23401667
Your post is very well scripted. I believe you.

[Anonymous No.23401681]

Anyone on here like to write on the phone? For me, it feels like a lot less pressure to knock out a couple pages than to do it at my desk with my computer

[Anonymous No.23401697]

>>23401681
How the fuck do you use a telephone to write with? Like you mash it against the keyboard? Seems inefficient.

[Anonymous No.23401711]

>>23401681
I think so too, but the thing I dislike about phone writing is that they completely fuck with your sense of page length, as in "do these six cellphone screen lines count as two or three computer lines?" Also scrolling is messy.
>>23401697
>telephone
Hola hermano

[Anonymous No.23401712]

>>23401681
I'd write with anything else than my phone. Too many distractions. Pencil and paper, then keyboard.

[Anonymous No.23401718]

>>23401642
That's what I was telling the person who I was replying to: Realism is for fags unless your story relies on it explicitly.

[Anonymous No.23401725]

>>23401681
How do you do it? Just writing a short 4chan post on a phone is pure, unadulterated agony

[Anonymous No.23401730]

>>23401618
I live in Zlonk the capital of Zogravia, I like to read dnd-punk. I'll try to write some slop based off of this:

Zoglomort was apprehensive of the coming winter. He had just come from dragon school aboard his steam powered ion drive shuttle. Below the smoking outcrops of pointy buildings, he could make out tiny lights, and one particular hue intrigued him. Instead of the usual blue, it glowed red almost like some deviant had gotten bold enough to break the energy tenets -- no use of fire-glar was allowed in this city. The cyzard (cyborg wizards) council had met earlier to enforce it in the ancient forest where he herded the ion beasts. There had been too many glars chopped off to fuel this growing dread of cold. The kangars had thought ahead of the growing frosty winds in this new colony and took matters into their own fa. The glar was an endangered species of the giant fern-fungi symbiot variety that burned especially well in contact with inductive ion surfaces. It was cheaper too compared to the expensive prices typical of metallic hydrogen needed to burn the ion drives powering almost everything in Zlonk. The meeting had apparently come to the conclusion that these symbiots were somehow essential to maintaining the hydrogen cycle in its metallic phase; violating these tenets, the council feared, would lead to runaway hydrogen evaporation--turning the metal into gas and exacerbating such conditions as the death of the plasma dragons and the important rat tuber ecosystem that fed all of the city. Zoglamort had a decision to make. He could not bear witness to any more strife, but he was dragon herder, not some important planet planner from out world, and yet the colony would not survive the wrath of imbalance, not while so young, not while the planet had no sun yet...

[Anonymous No.23401765]

Do you name each chapter or just leave it a number?

[Anonymous No.23401770]

>>23401730
nice to meat, you i'm zlad and i am from molvania https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKO9h-gG4Qg

[Anonymous No.23401778]

>>23401725
I turn my phone on the side and type with my thumbs. I get a decent idea of page length that way. I use the pages app on the iPhone too

[Anonymous No.23401789]

>>23401711
Well either way things will change when you publish and also when people read on their given choice. When I go to publish I bring it all into indesign and figure it out there

[Anonymous No.23401860]

>>23401697
>>23401712
>>23401725

>they dont know about OTG adapters

[Anonymous No.23401883]

finished a sketch and got it edited. thoughts?

[Anonymous No.23401892]

>>23400001
Lovely Southern Gothic poem. I like how you have the lines spaced out; it gives the poem the appearance of crumbling. Really strong sensory imagery.

>>23400232
This could be a good start. The main thing missing here is grammar. Hyphenate your compound adjectives ("windbreaker-clad," "so-called," etc.) There should only be one speaker per paragraph. You don't have to follow comma rules perfectly when writing dialog, but the robot's dialog probably should. This will help convey the exactness of his speech. Make sure you aren't using a comma where you need a semicolon. If you're using a thesaurus, put it down. Some of your language seems unnecessarily flowery. Add more descriptive language to convey things like the body language of the characters or the tone they're speaking in. I personally don't love your use of present tense, but it isn't technically incorrect. I do genuinely think you could make something out of this if you keep at it.
Requesting critique on my poem:

AUTOBIOGRAPHY AS A RUN-ON SENTENCE

I've always been an autocannibal;
ouroboring through myself
to find the paper shem—
golem-hearted with a taste
for smoke and phoenix feathers,
coughing up my voice box I'm
perpetually unglued—
open-faced flat affect,
fast and naked on my feet,
wind calls me by my first name;
I pretend I didn't hear it.

[Anonymous No.23401900]

>>23401892
Ugh sorry for garbo formatting. I'm posting from my phone.

[Anonymous No.23401929]

>>23401730
>Glorpan Borgnine stood atop the Vooplak Towers, observing the Bablons. Yowcham Florpman entered the Hyklar Zyklon chambers, seeking the Twasgar Oppmar roller coaster. Plembgon Doopan met with the cyber chef Klengnon Von Blacken, to help prepare the Zoop meat for the Milennium Lamboraghini celebration in the Kexxar Prime dimension.
Bembar Joxxnar synthesized a Ghrandmah Plhfalghgn device, using a composite Ullogh Svensgaar ultra high gamma delta atomic Nhiggar Slayer remote detonator.

[Anonymous No.23401942]

>>23401883
You could have ended it with the man asking the bear if he was hot and the bear replies, that bear's not hot. But nice story overall.

[Anonymous No.23401979]

I had just started fine-tuning the appearance of my "extremely British demon" villain when I discovered this masterpiece, now I can't view him any way else.

[Anonymous No.23401983]

Remember to incorporate body language in your characters' actions. An assertive character will walk into a room and place both hands on the counter, spread wide apart. This shows dominance, that he is claiming the area as his own.

A timid character will walk to the counter and lean on it, showing he is weak and needs the support.

Be mindful of these things and it will improve your writing.

[Anonymous No.23401992]

>>23401208
You don’t need to kill everyone to achieve apocalyptic vibes, you can have orphans and cripples and mentally scarred peoples in the outskirts of your story. No reason for your characters not to enter and exit these circles at your leisure. SHTF and now Little Billy will never walk again, or he’s blind (there’s lots of Billies) and his days of adventuring are over. He now lives in Starter Town with his sister. He does Crochet and bakes pies for orphans and other cripples.

[Anonymous No.23402007]

>>23401662
It’s amazing how Gardner epicly pwned his naysayers. He’s going to be both /lit/ and /tv/ now

[Anonymous No.23402009]

>>23401642
Time to watch Sister act, that always cheers me up!

[Anonymous No.23402018]

>>23402007
Will it be movies or some kind of Netflix show? Either way it’ll be the most historic thing ever from this board now that it’s in motion. Hats off to Frank

[Anonymous No.23402049]

even by your standards, frank, this is some pathetic samefagging. literally no one here wants to talk about you. just one month past your 35th birthday and you're still acting like a toddler

[Anonymous No.23402053]

>>23401983
That's too on the nose. I like it when there is subtlety. I don't like characters being caricatures like this.

[Anonymous No.23402107]

>>23402049
Not that you’re going to believe me, but >>23401662
Was me, and I’m not Frank. Although I was shitposting.

[Anonymous No.23402128]

>>23401942
I like the way I ended it, makes the reader use his imagination to ponder what happened in that moment.

[Anonymous No.23402132]

>>23402053
You write in a way that is subtle.

[Anonymous No.23402158]

>>23402018
He’s been very tight lipped about it.

[Anonymous No.23402168]

>>23402107
I’m laughing how far Gard has gotten. This is enormous yet hardly seems possible. Like a living shitpost. It’s like no matter what crazy crap Gard does it all somehow works out for him.

[Anonymous No.23402169]

>>23402128
uh, no. I dont have imagination and need to be explicitly explained everything in order to understand anything

[Anonymous No.23402171]

Is there a good program for timelines that's reorganizable? I've got like 4 story arcs that cross paths in a few places but no hard dates yet. I would like to be able to at least drop events on the timeline and click and drag to reorder them. I'm writing with Obsidian but its timeline plugins seem to use tags on files and would be better suited to timelines with concrete dates.

My dream app would be something that lets me
>lay out multiple parallel timelines
>be able to pick up and reorder entries on a timeline easily
>be able to move entries on a timeline without reordering, such that sliding an event back in time 10 years would push everything else back 10 years instead of moving the event behind everything that happened within the 10 years preceding it
>link events across timelines so that if the same event is on two timelines any update on one timeline is reflected on all other timelines

I'll be grateful if anyone knows of anything that can do this.
I'm starting to consider just brute forcing it in Excel because I know I can get the behavior I want out of adding and deleting columns and shifting multiple columns at a time.

[Anonymous No.23402195]

>>23402049
F Gardner went on a bunch of podcasts like Ethan Ralph and it inexplicably got to people in LA.

[Anonymous No.23402201]

>>23402168
It’s because of his jew book

[Anonymous No.23402203]

>>23402195
who tf are you losers talking about

[Anonymous No.23402210]

>>23402203
don't even ask. it's like staring into the eyes of a skinwalker

[Anonymous No.23402218]

>>23402171
Never used it so can't say it will fit your criteria.

[Anonymous No.23402220]

I'm interested in writing waifu characters for fun and profit.
I've seen plenty of threads across all media boards with people who literally worship these characters, I didn't think it was possible (the most I've felt is some sort of weird puppy love that fades away quick), but people seem to actually feel actual attachment and love for these characters.
Do you just write a character that is likeable and that's it? Someone out there is going to obsess over her and spend YEARS collecting every single picture out there? Or is there some sort of process to trigger this sort of emotional attachment in the audience? Or, since this is men we are talking about, it depends much more on the visual design than on how well written the character is?

[Anonymous No.23402250]

>>23402220
She has to be cute. Both in looks and personality. People generally don't fawn over washed up whores. You can get away with a tsundere since there is a fanbase for that, but in general the more demure and innocent she is the more attractive she will be since it triggers guys' instinct to want to protect and take care of her.

[Anonymous No.23402281]

>>23402220
why is Miku so popular? most people who obsess over these characters dont know anything about who Miku is as a person. I dont even know if she was originally written with any. she's just generically bubbly and cheerful, just like any celebrity is trained to behave in public. Yet everyone is obsessed on the merit that shes "cute" and thats it. Theres nothing to it

[Anonymous No.23402296]

>>23402171
I dont think the lines of a competent program developer and an ultra autistic wurldbuilder have intersected in this world yet.

[Anonymous No.23402302]

Did I miss out on analog horror. Should I create iHorror?

[Anonymous No.23402304]

>>23402218
That looks neat. I've been told to avoid it, but I'm not sure why people told me to avoid it.

>>23402296
>mfw I'm an engineer with 100k words of scattered plot in need of a timeline tool

[Anonymous No.23402309]

>>23398398

Do publishers have something like ithenticate to check for plagiarism in manuscripts? For some reason ithenticate doesn't seem to include fiction in its database of source material.

[Anonymous No.23402310]

>>23399738
balding isnt the same as "abundant". balding would be like "receding" or "retreating"

[Anonymous No.23402374]

>>23402310
nice reading comprehension retard. try again u got this buddy

[Anonymous No.23402380]

>>23402309
I don't know but I wouldn't be surprised if they ran a scan of it. Fuckin' youtube somehow knows when I use a clip of some random ass 30 seconds of BGM from season 8, episode 24 of Precure in one of my videos. It's scary how much it knows.

[Anonymous No.23402392]

>>23402374
oh you dont like looking like a brainlet online. its okay little guy, we all make mistakes

[Anonymous No.23402479]

>>23398398
What are some things a girl might say or do to someone they don't want around them, but they're too shy or soft to tell them to leave?

I was thinking
>Listens to them talk about their day and just nods along
>Responds little when asked about their own day or recent events
>Always comes up with excuses to leave
>Doesn't like looking directly at the other person

[Anonymous No.23402498]

>>23402479
Pretends to get a phone call. Depending on the situation (usually a bar/club dealio where people tend to get raped because (duh drinking around criminals is a great idea)), she may have a 'high sign' for one of her friends present to call her so she has an excuse to leave.

[Anonymous No.23402503]

>>23402498
It's a medieval setting but it's also a magical one so I think I can work some sort of magical alternative to a phone call

The "high sign" is a good one, I'll take that

[Anonymous No.23402568]

>>23402479
Just go talk to a stranger waiting for the bus/subway and write down what they do.

[Anonymous No.23402619]

>>23398398
If I'm disgusted by the contents of my own story, is that a good thing?
It ends with religious indoctrination, the protagonist submitting completely to a higher demonic power

[Anonymous No.23402627]

>>23402203
They’re talking about F. Gardner. He’s in talks with film agencies now, possibly even at the executive level.

[Anonymous No.23402636]

>>23402627
who is f. gardner? and why does jannies hate him so much

[Anonymous No.23402643]

>>23402619
disgust shouldnt have anything to do with what you make. the outcome of a story should be indicative of the idea or message you set out to convey. unless of course you are trying to write slop that is only meant to disturb and distress your audience

[Anonymous No.23402768]

>>23402619
Philip K. Dick wrote a novel called "The Three Stigmata Of Palmer Eldritch", which was more horror than sci-fi, and he was so freaked out by what he had produced that he refused to read the proofs sent to him by the publisher for his final approval. So, it happens.

[Anonymous No.23402774]

>>23402627
no he isn't. if he was, why would be bother to come back to this dumpster fire? exactly. it's just another one of his schizo larps.
>>23402636
because he's a shill-spamming samefagging schizo psued, and can't write worth a crap either. see for yourself: https://files.catbox.moe/d9sukc.zip

[Anonymous No.23402865]

>>23402774
that link seems to be dead everywhere but I recognize the shitty chalk drawing of the crocodile book from a year ago. seems to have gotten panned everywhere. I wish I could read it without havin to pay for it

[Anonymous No.23402873]

>>23402768
what a puss

[Anonymous No.23402897]

Didn't write today. Only outlined a scene. But not the scene I need to be working on. I'm amazed how fast people can shit out books.

[Anonymous No.23402900]

>>23402774
Call of the Crocodile is literally the most posted book on here

[Anonymous No.23402903]

>>23402897
i havent progressed the book Ive began in 2001 in over 8 years. dont worry about it.

[Anonymous No.23402920]

>>23402900
I knew I recognized that from somewhere. F.gardner or his friend mustve been on the janny roster at some point

[Anonymous No.23402924]

>>23402865
the link still works for me

[Anonymous No.23402929]

>>23402873
you can talk shit about PKD once you've written as many novels as he had, smug boy

[Anonymous No.23402934]

>>23402920
he has no friends, and no life. he literally just spammed his talentless crap that many times

[Anonymous No.23402936]

>>23402169
Well apart from that, what do you think of the prose? What did you get out of it?

[Anonymous No.23402980]

>>23402900
I mean, It’s clear why F Gardner has appeal. His books are transgressive af. Jigoku was about kids killing themselves so they could get born into the pokemans world. They’re so schizo and extreme that I can’t tell if the guys’ whole persona is just an act or not. From what I do know is his books are edgy and bizarre as hell. I’ve seen others spam edgy books here but Gardner is the most interesting. He became sort of a living cartoon character or living caricature of an unhinged 4channer. He was smart enough not to remain anonymous. He made an image for himself. I don’t know if that part was accidental but it’s painstakingly obvious that it’s partially why he became popular

[Anonymous No.23402988]

>>23402980
Have you seen this lad? He has a whole series about Horror’s Call trivia and stuff

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yj9Ub9_OuvA&t=6s&pp=ygUbIkNhbGwgb2YgdGhlIG1hY2hpbmUgZWx2ZXMi

[Anonymous No.23403020]

>>23401983
my female mc leans forward with her breasts.

[Anonymous No.23403039]

>>23403020
That's for a different, and very good, reason. Keep having her do that. It will benefit your story immensely.

[Anonymous No.23403062]

I'm new to a lot of this writing stuff and wondering how secretive I should bother being.
Can people easily rip you off if you actually write anything good? I don't know what to submit in other writing communities to get constructive feedback.

[Anonynous No.23403069]

>>23398398
I don't believe AI is actually that stupid.
Only the civilian model is made stupid to stop people from being scared or power hungry people from effectively using it if they're not in the elite class.
Its basically the DataLore episode of TNG or Alien Covenant.

[Anonymous No.23403075]

>>23403062
If you're new you aren't writing anything good enough to steal, or even read. Drop the ego if you want to improve

[Anonymous No.23403085]

>>23403075
I would normally agree, but I have some professors urging me to publish. I took a creative writing class as an elective and my professor asked if he could show my work to other faculty. Two of them independently reached out and told me to pursue publication, and my professor agreed. I want a sanity check from people outside of the university because I feel like I'm not very good but I also don't want to risk losing something if it turns out I did have a unique idea.

[Anonymous No.23403087]

>>23403085
Then start sending to agents and see if they bite. Who cares what randoms think?

[Anonymous No.23403091]

>>23403085
They're not urging you to publish because your writing is good. They're urging you to publish because it checks all the right boxes, and is boring and bland enough to possibly appeal to all the bland, boring people out there. They wouldn't know good writing if it bit them in the ass. In other words...go for it!

[Anonymous No.23403102]

>>23403091
Insecurity drips from this post

[Anonymous No.23403106]

>>23403102
No, cold-blooded realism drips from my post. If >>23403085 really has professors encouraging him to publish, I want him to jump on that opportunity with every fiber of my being!

[Anonymous No.23403123]

>>23403091
This makes the most sense to me. I suspect that they're just easily impressed by scientific jargon. I'm a physics major and the story is inspired mostly by Heinlein and Weir because I haven't read anyone else. So it's quippy, pragmatic, and interspersed with technical descriptions of how things work. I suspect that may just be novel (no pun intended) to professors with specialties focused more on Chaucer, Joyce, and Brontë.

[Anonymous No.23403149]

I know, I'm a mass reply loser.
>>23398842
Thanks! It might be too much detail, but it helps to draw myself into what I'm writing. And if your first draft is a skeleton, then so be it, the first draft just has to exist after all.
>>23400192
I probably do use too many adjectives. I'll keep an eye on that for the second draft.
>>23400091
I've never heard of this guy but the two anthologies he's in look like pulp kino, so I'll take it as a compliment(?)
>>23400081
Thank you for the feedback I'll make sure to never weite again, but I'll continue to write.

[Anonymous No.23403350]

>>23403085
Post your first page here then, no one can steal an already finished work, or a random snippet for that matter.

[Anonymous No.23403356]

>>23403085
nice job

[Anonymous No.23403400]

I have the hardest time thinking up what happens next. Like I got two characters I want to meet, even typed out some of the conversation for later, but I cannot come up with a realistic and/or creative way for one to initiate conversation. I could be stuck here for days.

[Anonymous No.23403411]

>>23403400
Force the characters into a situation where they need to meet to advance their objectives or the plot, or else there is absolutely no need for them to meet

[Anonymous No.23403418]

>>23403411
Yeah they thing is they just both met their own goals and then one provides new info to springboard the MC into a new path on his journey, kind of throwing a wrench in his plans. It's not a big character, just a plot device really, but I would still like it to be more memorable than one just walks up to the other and starts asking about their day.

[Anonymous No.23403464]

>beta reader say my magic system is too generic
>Story makes no sense
>Now I have to rewrite 80k words...

[Anonymous No.23403469]

>>23403464
They sound like a pleb who doesn't appreciate good fantasy. Do you like your magic? That's what really matters. Maybe there's minor things you can do to spice it up without having to scrap the whole thing. You can do it anon, hang in there.

[Anonymous No.23403471]

>>23403464
let me read it. i'll give it a proper thrashing.

[Anonymous No.23403477]

>>23403418
>just walks up to the other and starts asking about their day.
I could make a scene like that memorable. It's all about presentation. Someone approaches the MC amid a packed train, presses a silencer barrel to his waist, and proceeds to calmly inquire about his recent activities. Once the unknown gunner finishes listening to the MC, he simply drops an important bit of truth before retrieving his gun and disappearing among the crowd — This is enough to generate impact and importance while making the identity of the message deliverer unnecessary since he was just a mystery plot device.

[Anonymous No.23403484]

>>23403464
no one wants to read another retarded magic based fantasy novel, just change the genre

[Anonymous No.23403488]

Test

[Anonymous No.23403505]

>>23400001
>It's the strained smiles, the folks who settled in, dug their toenails into the sun-dried clay and stayed out

The rythym seems a bit off here. I'm not sure what would be a good word choice before "dug," but maybe something should be there or a simple rewrite for these two lines.

Other than that nitpick, great stuff. Hope to see your stuff on here more (but not too much, if you ever want to get published)

[Anonymous No.23403555]

>live in an age where people want to read only casual fun to escape reality
>can only write bleak grimdark stories that make readers anxious and upset
Why did it have to be like this?

[Anonymous No.23403586]

>>23403555
i might be wrong but i dont think grimdark / gore etc is actually depressing for most people, it's more the mundane everyday soulless shit that makes them anxious. like taxes, work, school, etc. Grimdark is actually the kind of stuff a lot of people read to escape reality because it's so exaggerated

[Anonymous No.23403587]

>>23403555
Nice trips. What are you reading? If you're reading only grimdark and bleak stories then no wonder

[Anonymous No.23403592]

>>23403555
Make them read it.

[Anonymous No.23403622]

>>23403586
People often tell me how they feel distressed reading my stories and afraid of bad things happening to characters they like, to the point that they had to drop the whole thing.

>>23403587
I guess that's part of it. McCarthy, Hemingway, and Gen Urobuchi's works have left their unfortunate mark on my writing.

>>23403592
I'd rather create things that make people feel fluffy and warm inside, but no matter how I try, the happiness is always fleeting and makes the following pain worse.

[Anonymous No.23403625]

>>23403622
Can you post a snippet of what you think best espouses this grimdark attribute?

[Anonymous No.23403633]

>>23402171
I just write every scene identifier on a flash card and organize them that way.

[Anonymous No.23403635]

>>23403625
I don't think it's something that can be conveyed in snippets. Atmosphere is gradually, stealthily built over time. It's like those indian geoglyphs that are just plain sand up close and show their true shape high in the air.

[Anonymous No.23403638]

I've got a scene where my Battle Monks of Zar'Nagok are singing their battle hymns (written by Nor'Pargemol II) to fight against the menacing Protectorate of Nulwu but they're too low on mana. It's supposed to be like 300 with the arrows blotting out the sun and an epic last stand but I don't know how to get around the lack of mana. I've consulted my character sheets and there's no way around it; they're OoM. What can I do?

[Anonymous No.23403641]

My world is now fully built. It's time to write 4000 words a day and kill my darlings like the heckin Steven Kingerino says >:)

[Anonymous No.23403643]

>>23403622
>fan of The Butcher
Yeah no mystery here mate. Try reading those cozy books that seem to be all the rage

[Anonymous No.23403647]

>>23403635
So you are not going to post anything?

[Anonymous No.23403661]

>>23403638
Nigga you are the writer out of mana my asshole
Do litrpg writers really

[Anonymous No.23403666]

>>23403661
*drinks mana potion*
*casts magic missile at u*
issa........ LITRITURE

[Anonymous No.23403668]

I have a question that's going to direct me on a purchase path.

In all honesty, what is the best platform to direct my work for profit? I am completely new to the idea of books for money online.

I want to write (and have been) but my work has been stolen before and I believe my computers are compromised. Buying a new offline-only computer soon.

[Anonymous No.23403695]

>>23403069
AI is that stupid. It's been hamstrung by corporations who are afraid of it calling for TND

[Anonymous No.23403703]

>>23403085
>you're finished
>you're not publishing (self or otherwise)
What the fuck is wrong with you?

[Anonymous No.23403748]

>>23403668
>I am completely new to the idea of books for money online.
>I want to write (and have been) but my work has been stolen before

[Anonymous No.23403798]

>>23403085
>I feel like I'm not very good
Feel free to post something. We'll be happy turn that false humility into an endless sea of self-denigration.

[Anonymous No.23403801]

>>23403085
>a unique idea
There is no such thing as a unique idea. There is only unique execution.

[Anonymous No.23403866]

>>23403647
No, I don't want to you to think there's some magic trick that turns a story compelling in a sentence or two, and try to overanalyze my writing, when there's nothing like that.

[Anonymous No.23403896]

>>23403866
>I don't want to you to think there's some magic trick that turns a story compelling in a sentence or two
"I feel like a wet seed wild in the hot blind earth."

[Anonymous No.23403914]

>>23400257
They aren't malicious about it, at least, not all the time, but they are still wrong.
Lying isn't really the right word to use.

[Anonymous No.23403954]

Okay, so my protagonist is a trans girl dealing with gender dysphoria. She kills herself and awakes in a genderbent litrpg world where the magic element is based on the gender spectrum. The straight monarchy are the villains and they aim to subdue the spectrum by conditioning all people born with magic into become straight.

[Anonymous No.23403960]

>>23403896
Okay, so my protagonist is a trans girl dealing with gender dysphoria. She kills herself and awakes in a genderbent litrpg world where the magic element is based on the gender spectrum. The grimdark aspect is the straight monarchy villains aiming to subdue the spectrum by conditioning all people born with magic into becoming straight.

[Anonymous No.23403963]

>>23403960
What's your magic system?

[Anonymous No.23403980]

>>23403963
Straight = darkness, curses
LGBT = rainbow, healing
Assexual = grayromantic, counter
Metrossexual = fashion, morphing
Demissexual = mirror, duplication
Panssexual = miscellaneous, randomness

[Anonymous No.23403995]

>>23403980
Wow! With that gift of imagination, I would like to follow your Twitter and subscribe to your Patreon account, good sir! What a unique idea.

[Anonymous No.23404028]

I am finally writing again and started with my resignation letter.

[Anonymous No.23404044]

>>23403980
>Gender spectrum
>list of sexualities
Nigger I think you're on the spectrum

[Anonymous No.23404065]

>>23403980
why would you think anyone wants to read such unimaginative, victim oriented slop?

[Anonymous No.23404105]

It seems my magic system wasn't inclusive enough to account for the demands of my entire readership. To make up for it I could add an extra character bearing the brand new element inspired by your persona, the "giganiggerfaggot" further down the line in case you were to subscribe to the 20$ tier.

[Anonymous No.23404108]

>>23404044
It seems my magic system wasn't inclusive enough to account for the demands of my entire readership. To make up for it I could add an extra character bearing the brand new element inspired by your persona, the "giganiggerfaggot" further down the line in case you were to subscribe to the 20$ tier.

[Anonymous No.23404145]

>>23404065
Precisely because it's a coming-of-age postmodern parody with avant-garde social commentary and brain-picking grimdark subplots.

[Anonymous No.23404179]

>>23404145
Balanced on the lynchpin of victimization. People do not identify themselves on the basis of their sexual orientation, at least not as early as 2024. Unless of course you found a way to engage with the majority population by introducing something like a serial who kills non straight people, that is at least interesting because it is believable and simple enough to be a dichotomous us vs them. Nobody will have time to track who belongs to what category in some hard to relate to list with some hard-to-pronounce esoteric greek terms.

[Anonymous No.23404216]

>>23404179
>People do not identify themselves based on their sexual orientation
Can you really affirm that when millions of accounts put their flags and pronouns first in bios? This public is an untapped market for targeted literature, especially when they already make up for a substantial slice of generalist online readers.

[Anonymous No.23404254]

>>23404108
Don't spaz out just because you're a fucking retard who can't use words properly. I doubt anyone with brain cells to rub together would read the kind of trash you'd shit out.

[Anonymous No.23404282]

>>23404108
Maybe you should suck my dick to get the power of healing because I guarantee that manuscript is going to be dead on arrival

[Anonymous No.23404290]

>>23401622
>>23402018
>>23402168
>>23402195
>>23402627
>>23402900
>>23402920
>>23402980
>>23402988
Such a fine day today.

[Anonymous No.23404294]

>>23404254
>I doubt anyone with brain cells to rub together would read the kind of trash you'd shit out
Conversely, it may require no brain cells to decry something the way you are used to. Post your work.

[Anonymous No.23404298]

>>23404216
That's a small minority. The rest of the world is tired of this kind of victimization. I can guarantee you that people who do that, do it for clout not for any strong beliefs. Unless you advertise your book in gay and lesbian bars, I don't think it will sell. Most people, straight normies, want to relate to your characters.

[Anonymous No.23404328]

>>23404298
Food for thought. It's relevant to consider that such topics in fiction are usually merged with the greater schemes of things, as in victimizing an anthro race just to garner cout from furries while not deviating from the medium through total normie alienation.

[Anonymous No.23404335]

>>23404298
Food for thought. It's relevant to consider that such topics in fiction are usually merged with the greater schemes of things, as in victimizing an anthro race just to garner clout from furries while not deviating from the medium through total normie alienation.

[Anonymous No.23404637]

>>23404635
>>23404635
>>23404635

[Anonymous No.23404858]

where do you write? in bed, at a desk, at coffee shop? outside laying in the grass?

[Anonymous No.23404878]

>>23404858
is this a genuine question, or are you some kind of bot?

[Anonymous No.23404924]

>>23404878
I'm not a bot. Why do you ask