What the FUCK did I just read?

[Anonymous No.23193038]

It was a fantastic tale. I wrote a huge post about it but it got deleted because "lol wrong captcha xD", so fuck all that shit.

GRRM is a retard for thinking of this tale in such a realistic lens. "What was Aragorn's tax policy?" Is he an idiot? Does he not understand that this story was a fairy tale about war and the effects it has on the all enduring human spirit?

I swear too many people took this work far too literally. Jesus Christ.

[Anonymous No.23193059]

>>23193038
Glad you liked the books anon. Now you must read the Silmarillion.

[Anonymous No.23193128]

>>23193059
I will. It was how he meant people to read the work, so I'll do it.

[Anonymous No.23193137]

>>23193038
>GRRM is a retard for thinking of this tale in such a realistic lens. "What was Aragorn's tax policy?" Is he an idiot? Does he not understand that this story was a fairy tale about war and the effects it has on the all enduring human spirit?

What was King Robert's tax policy? King Aegon's? No one fucking knows because GRRM didn't just miss the point of LotR, he's a hypocrite.

[Anonymous No.23193151]

>>23193038
it's pretty good. i read it as a child and thought it was le heckin greatest literature ever. watched the movies plenty of times in the intervening years, then decided to reread the books last year.
overall, they are very good, and you can see why they were so influential, but some of it really doesn't hold up. i really don't much like his portrayal of sam as this blindly stupid loyal fool who is very much aware of how stupid he is and is basically one step up from frodo's dog as a character. and aragorn is really annoying in the book, he's constantly bragging and singing randomly, and instead of everyone being like uhhh ok they're all like
>wow verily do we live in the age where tales come to life
and gaze upon him with amazement. i know tolkein didn't write it to be bragging but it's very much how it comes across, and it's something peter jackson was right to remove in the films
also, theoden is total garbage in the book. he's not under some spell by saruman, he's basically just a senile old fool that wormtongue tricks into just wrecking his own kingdom, and gandalf just comes along and basically says
>come on mate, stop being shit
and he just snaps out of it. strange decision by tolkein

[Anonymous No.23193252]

>>23193038
Would recommend Tolkien's essay "On Fairy Stories", short story "Leaf by Niggle", and poem "Mythopoeia" as companion pieces.

[Anonymous No.23193271]

>>23193252
Tolkien's hatred for fairy stories is misguided. He was inspired by them. LOTR wouldnt exist without the early fantasy.

[Anonymous No.23193402]

>>23193271
>Tolkien's hatred for fairy stories
proof? I got exactly the opposite insight from On Fairy Stories i.e. people back in the pre-industrial days had more common sense

[Anonymous No.23193414]

>>23193252
>Leaf by Niggle

Based beyond all reason

[Anonymous No.23193438]

>>23193271
>Tolkien's hatred for fairy stories
Are you some kind of retard?

[Anonymous No.23193451]

>>23193038
Cinema sins has destroyed a generation of story tellers.
>Actually these constellations would not be visible on this side of the equator. *DING!*
>Sure good is good and evil and evil but what about the baby orcs? Did they have to die too? *DING!*
>This movie does not pass thr Bechdel test. *DING!*
>what's that? A joke that uses an anachronism? This silly comedy must be up to scruples! *DING!*

[Anonymous No.23193502]

>>23193038
Who was your favorite character, OP?

I'm rereading the trilogy right now. Just finished "A Conspiracy Unmasked" tonight. Man, I forgot how genuinely clever and crafty the hobbits are. Jackson's movies use them for a lot of broad comedy but a lot of them are surprisingly subtle and wise. Not just Frodo, Merry is quite cunning and sharp, too. I really love book Merry, he's very witty as well.

[Anonymous No.23193512]

Oh man this world is amazing, I can't wait to learn more about the lore and about the elves and Gandalf as Frodo and the hobbits adventu-
>HEY DOL MERRY DOL RING A DONG DILLO
>RING A DONG HOP ALONG FAL LAL THE WILLOW
>TOM BOM JOLLY TOM TOM BOMBADILLO
Well, ok that was a bit odd but necessary for the plot to advance, let's see what the next chapter has in store
>HO TOM BOMBADIL TOM BOMBADILLO BY WATER WOOD AND HILL BY THE REED AND WILLOW
Ok that's over with finally the story can resume as norm-
>OLD TOM BOMBADIL IS A MERRY FELLOW BRIGHT BLUE HIS JACKET IS
>AND HIS BOOTS ARE YELLOW

[Anonymous No.23193525]

>>23193512
As I've gotten older and reread the trilogy multiple times the Bombadil parts have become some of my favorite in the entire series. I might actually have gotten to the point where "In the House of Tom Bombadil" is my favorite LOTR chapter.

[Anonymous No.23193590]

>>23193137
To be as charitable as possible to the fat man, I think he was trying to say that just because Aragorn was a good warrior and leader during war, that it doesn't automatically follow that he'd be a good king.

Robert is probably GRRM's answer to that question. Robert actively hates administering a kingdom and wishes he were still fighting and leading armies around. He cared so little about the administration part that he let Littlefinger do whatever he wanted with no guard rails, which led to Littlefinger embezzling massive sums of money.

It's still a silly comparison because Aragorn is a partial aspect/prefiguration of Christ. He's Christ the prephesied King, Tolkien just cut Jesus's 1000 year reign in half when the epilogue states that Aragorn ruled for 500 years.

[Anonymous No.23193604]

You shouldn't be considered an adult until you're 33
You shouldn't be allowed to marry until then either
Society should deindustrialize a bit
Less emphasis on formal education and qualification for employment

[Anonymous No.23193606]

>>23193038
every time i try to read this i get bored within the first 200 pages. ive heard it gets better but the first book sucks

[Anonymous No.23193607]

Unfinished Tales is underrated
https://tolkiengateway.net/wiki/Aldarion_and_Erendis:_The_Mariner%27s_Wife

[Anonymous No.23194019]

>>23193525
Tom Bombadil's chapters are a pleb filter. An inability to appreciate them reveals either one's low age or lack of soul.

[Anonymous No.23194656]

>>23193502
I'm going to have to go with Sam. I feel a kinship to his character, the way he self deprecates but still has fierce loyalty to his values, master, and chosen path.

>>23193606
I LOVED the first book and the Mines of Moria chapter is probably the greatest thing put to page in fiction; not even exaggerating.

[Anonymous No.23194673]

>>23193606
For me it's the opposite the first book is the best and the closer Frodo gets to Mordor (past Rivendell) the more of a slog it becomes

[Anonymous No.23194688]

>>23193038
btw when you get wrong captcha while making a thread and your post disappears you have to navigate back on the website and then try it again and your text will be there again

[Anonymous No.23194767]

I usually kinda stop rereading after Lothlórien. Between the breaking of the fellowship to the siege of Minas Tirith is a part that tires me out.

[Anonymous No.23194781]

>>23194767
I can understand why. Not that the part after Lothlórien is worse, but it's where the fantastical adventure stops and grim reality begins in a different sort of way. My favourite part is probably the journey from the Shire to Rivendell.

[Anonymous No.23194783]

>>23193038
>deleted because "lol wrong captcha xD
I'm kekking at the fact you dont know you could have easily gotten it back, newfag

[Anonymous No.23194819]

>>23193038
>it got deleted because "lol wrong captcha xD"
It wasn't deleted. All you had to do was returned to the previous screen and type the correct captcha.

[Anonymous No.23195036]

>>23193137

[Anonymous No.23195101]

>>23193606
it's a RPF (reverse pleb filter): plebs keep reading while the patricians are Tolkien's brothers
but it's ok, after all, even Middle Earth needs slaves :3

[Anonymous No.23195142]

>>23193512
>>23193525
>>23194019
bombadil embodies the pagan concept of hospitality or somethin
idk i'm not smart enough to back it up but it's probably true

[Anonymous No.23195159]

>>23195142
He's deliberately a mystery. I see him as an example of weird bits of myths that come out of left field and don't seem to fit, but they're still part of the myth so you've got to accept them. Like the weird bit in Exodus where God tries to kill Moses for no apparent reason.

[Anonymous No.23195197]

>>23193137
The whole point of Robert’s character was to show that a warrior and a “hero” type character don’t make for good kings. There is more to being a king than just winning the throne, and Robert obviously neglected his counsellors at the small council to whore and drink and have tourneys. That’s the point. He doesn’t have a tax policy because he just doesn’t care about being a king.

[Anonymous No.23195210]

>another lotr vs asoiaf thread

there's a containment for this now since you dont like the fantasy general
>>23194237

[Anonymous No.23195216]

>>23195142
>pagan concept of hospitality
is this related to cannibalism or somethin?

[Anonymous No.23195221]

>>23193038
Holy FUCK. GRRM offered the most mild critique of LOTR and you retards have been seething for years, it’s hardly even criticism. He just said he would like to approach the picture differently. Stupid fucks, I hate Tolkien fanboys so much.

[Anonymous No.23195228]

>>23195221
GRRM hardly qualifies as a human being while Tolkien is somewhere in the top 0.5% even if I disagree with him

[Anonymous No.23195248]

>>23195228
>hasn't read him
>but is sure he's a genius
oh, fuck off and think for yourself for once

[Anonymous No.23195341]

>>23195248
hey I didn't say he was a genius, I said he was a high quality man
also the word "genius" is synonymous with being a one-trick pony, so you are technically right: he was a genius, as all his efforts went into developing the same world...
I mostly enjoy his non-fiction, his fiction bores me

[Anonymous No.23195408]

>>23193038
>It was a fantastic tale. I wrote a huge post about it but it got deleted because "lol wrong captcha xD",
Liar liar pants on fire

[Anonymous No.23195524]

are there any casinos in Tolkien's world?
what about jails?

[Anonymous No.23195566]

>>23193038
Someone post the chart, I know someone has it.

[Anonymous No.23195574]

>>23193059
Ah, I need to get to this. I read Lord of the rings last year, but I've yet to read this, despite it being on my bookshelf just as I am typing this message!

[Anonymous No.23195592]

>>23195216
study germanic/norse paganism.
they had a culture of hospitality. accepting strangers into your home and feeding them is a part of many germanic/norse myths.
i guess its on me for assuming people in a tolkien thread would be familiar with the source material that LotR is based on, lol

[Anonymous No.23195628]

>>23195592
anon I asked because you studied them enough to give a concise and fitting answer that settles the matter
unless you are much inferior to any Christian... in which case I understand why you wont (cannibalism, child abuse etc etc :)
>they had a culture of hospitality. accepting strangers into your home and feeding them is a part of many germanic/norse myths.
that's like saying "I have a culture of honoring contracts" yeah right take that to the bank and apply for a loan lol

[Anonymous No.23195636]

>>23193607
I like how at the end the king admits that Erendis is being a bitter cunt and that Aldarion was in the right.

[Anonymous No.23195663]

>>23195628
Treow/oathkeeping and hospitality were the foundations of their law. They took it seriously.

[Anonymous No.23195672]

>>23193502
Loved Merry and Pippin in the books. Also, Pippin's last thought before he thinks he is about to die in the last battle... tears every time, man

[Anonymous No.23195682]

>>23193512
kek Tom is based and filterpilled

[Anonymous No.23195690]

>>23195663
I am 100% for the nordic "steal the prettiest wives" attitude but what you are telling me is still not an answer

[Anonymous No.23195694]

>>23194656
'A Balrog,' muttered Gandalf. 'Now I understand.' He faltered and leaned heavily on his staff. 'What an evil fortune! And I am already weary.'

Chills every fucking time, man

[Anonymous No.23195699]

>>23195159
kek do you know the verse and chapter of the God and Moses thing?

[Anonymous No.23195750]

>>23193525
I rather like the Bombadil chapters, the real issue is him saving them from the Wights. Absolutely robs the story of a real sense of danger for quite a while afterwards.

[Anonymous No.23195763]

>>23195699
Exodus 4:24

24 And it came to pass by the way in the inn, that the Lord met him, and sought to kill him.

25 Then Zipporah took a sharp stone, and cut off the foreskin of her son, and cast it at his feet, and said, Surely a bloody husband art thou to me.

26 So he let him go: then she said, A bloody husband thou art, because of the circumcision.

[Anonymous No.23195773]

>>23193038
If I disliked Jackson's LOTR, will I dislike the books?

[Anonymous No.23195819]

>>23195773
i would bet $50 that yes

[Anonymous No.23195840]

>>23195819
OK, I won't try them then.

[Anonymous No.23195857]

>>23195840
if you are under 25 maybe try The Hobbit, it's short and rolls along quite nicely
LOTR is worth trying too, until you get bored; when you get bored you just put it down and be at peace, that's what I did
but then again I didn't "dislike" Jackson's LOTR, hence my confidence in the wager :)

[Anonymous No.23195866]

>>23195857
So if you didn't finish LOTR, which your post implies, can you call yourself a real fan/an accurate judge?

[Anonymous No.23195879]

>>23193512
>>23195142
>>23195159
in a watsonian sense, tom bombadil is probably the wild spirit of middle earth itself, represented as happy and welcoming but also mysterious, as that's how tolkien viewed eru (god) who created middle earth
From a doyleist perspective, he's kind of a meta joke between tolkien and his family. he was a character that tolkien came up with for his children when he told them bedtime stories, so in a meta sense he was there "before the stones and the trees" because he was literally created as a character before tolkien conceived of middle earth

[Anonymous No.23195894]

>>23195628
What the fuck are you on about dude? Hospitality was important to Germanic pagan culture. It has nothing to do with cannibalism. I’m not sure what “answer” you’re seeking. Are you asking me to confirm whether or not Germanic pagans practiced cannibalism? The answer would be that I don’t know.
I seriously cannot comprehend why you’re saying any of this. Whatever point you’re reaching for is lost on me. I merely provided some information.
Tolkien was writing in the pagan tradition. He was a professor of Norse studies.

[Anonymous No.23195920]

>>23195866
I didn't call myself a "real fan" or an "accurate judge"
but I believe that one can judge how salty soup is just by tasting a spoonful... one need not drink the entire cauldron, need he?
that being said I appreciate people who like LOTR and that's that believe it or not.

[Anonymous No.23195928]

>>23195773
If you don't like LotR then you aren't white. Sorry.

[Anonymous No.23195929]

>>23195894
>Democratic Republic of Germany is Democratic because it's called the Democratic Republic of Germany
don't worry, one day you will understand

[Anonymous No.23195979]

>>23195929
??? is this a bot? you just keep replying with non-sequiturs. speak plainly.

[Anonymous No.23196014]

>>23195979
you are just some trash your hypothetical nordics would have executed without a second thought
so be kind and fuck off and never post on the internet again

[Anonymous No.23196029]

>>23196014
Oh, I get it know, you're mistaking my cursory knowledge of germanic paganism for an allegiance to paganism. You're also unhinged and strange.
I'm sorry to inform you that you're shadowboxing.

[Anonymous No.23196103]

>>23196029
>im not gay u are shabowdoxing!!!!11111
take meds

[Anonymous No.23196122]

>>23196103
dude I said that Bombadil might've been in part a reference to pagan concepts of hospitality (Tolkien studied pagan texts) and you immediately assumed i was a pagan and started sperging out and getting assmad at me. i have no idea how you can be so retarded. i'm not pagan. you're being a huge faggot.

[Anonymous No.23196121]

Tolkien himself was clearly an Elfaboo but Gondor is my favorite faction in the trilogy. I would love to be a Man of Gondor and live in Minas Tirith or Dol Amroth.

[Anonymous No.23196126]

>>23193038
Let us be reality; the movies are better and some of the best films of all time

[Anonymous No.23196132]

>>23196122
>x is y
>z studied y
>you assumed I know y
>why do you assume I am affiliated with y?!
>why?
>why?
>reeeeee
>YOU SPERGING OUT ASSMAD
>I DID NOTHING WRONG
>I AM NOT AFFILIATED WITH Y
>I AM NOT A FAGGOT YOU ARE
>t. pegan pride
the fuck

[Anonymous No.23196150]

>>23196132
this nigga has to be trolling

[Anonymous No.23196151]

>>23196132
i'm not pagan.

[Anonymous No.23196196]

>>23196151
so what the fuck are you going on about pagan hospitality you cocksucking steak?!

[Anonymous No.23196502]

>>23195773
I think you can get some enjoyment from the books. Sure, some of the beats are the same, but the books still have quality storytelling that aren't featured in the films.

[Anonymous No.23197306]

>>23193451
Who even watches Cinemasins these days

[Anonymous No.23197327]

>>23193604
Why 33?

[Anonymous No.23197353]

A lot of writers do this thing where they try too hard to say something intellectual and profound and often that is critical of other writers or ideas. I think that’s basically what Martin was doing here and if I had to guess if he regrets this interview, I would say he does.

But the thing about Martin specifically that it makes clear is that he’s grasping at straws for ways to differentiate himself from Tolkien while at the same time likening himself. Why? Because Tolkien is the god-father of fantasy, the spiritual success of ancient and medieval myth, and a literary giant, while Martin is basically nothing more than a screenwriter that puddles smut. In fact, his novels would have been considered smut in any prior century. It would be too shameful for him to be honest and open about the fact that in truth, his novels are more D&D nerd power fantasy than proper heir to Tolkien. This is a guy that collects action figures and proudly displays them in his house. He is an ultra-modern, ethically impoverished, progressive and degenerate boomer who merely put his most ridiculous fantasies and takes on paper, and the shock of that on the big screen carried it to popularity. The key to popularity in contemporary television is exciting the senses. It’s about incest, pedophilia, crushed skulls, and gorey gushing wounds. That’s what gets the masses interested, that’s what carries a book over the top in sales and popularity, and that’s all these books are. If you removed the smut, the incest, pedophilia, the nudity and the sex, the gore and over-the-top violence, these books are basically nothing at all. And that’s why he feels so pressured to make comments like this. He desperately wants to justify why this is somehow literary and not just something a lot like porn. And the easiest way to do that is to disparage the greats who didn’t do what you do. After all, could Tolkien really have been a great writer if nobody fucked their sister or got their head squished like a grape in his books? Whoops! I mean, if he didn’t make clear that Aragorn was good because he had a progressive wealth redistribution plan and civil rights law for orcs? Am I right, media? Please shill my books.

[Anonymous No.23198554]

>>23197353
>Because Tolkien is the god-father of fantasy
Lord Dunsany, Kipling, Robert E Howard and Edgar Rice Burroughs are all miles more important than him. Hell the whole fight over a magic mcguffin that can defeat the scary necromancer in lord of the rings is a total ripoff of hour of the dragon.

[Anonymous No.23198592]

>>23193038
>people took this work far too literally
Falling on the Bible cuck defense.

[Anonymous No.23198598]

>>23195773
It means you probably will like the books.
There is virtually no overlap between filmfags and bookfags where Tolkien is concerned.

[Anonymous No.23198636]

>>23193038
>>23193137
>GRRM is a retard for thinking of this tale in such a realistic lens. "What was Aragorn's tax policy?" Is he an idiot? Does he not understand that this story was a fairy tale about war and the effects it has on the all enduring human spirit?

You are a retard for misunderstanding GRRMs quotation here actually. He loves and enjoys Lord of the Rings. He is commenting on his own writing style, and how it was effected by enjoying Lord of the Rings, and how he began to think about fantasy and reality and what he personally liked to or wanted to portray. He isn't shitting on Tolkien or LOTR. Stop being propagandized by image macros, please.

[Anonymous No.23199457]

>>23193402
He used to write them for his wife in his early days. He soured on them over time though

[Anonymous No.23199470]

>>23198554
Reading HOTD right now. Tolkien is a pussy, but he's /our/ pussy.

[Anonymous No.23199604]

>>23199470
Also fuck GRRM for stealing another thing's initials.