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/lit/ - Literature

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2312231 No.2312231 [Reply] [Original]

Does Brownbear lurk here anymore?
Or any other supercool tripfags?

>> No.2312242

any cool tripfags? anyone?

>> No.2312248
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2312248

Ssh, party's over. Go home and get some sleep.

>> No.2312253

>>2312231
>cool
>tripfags

>> No.2312258

>>2312248
Hi 3rd, I remember you. The guy with the beard and glasses. Brownbear left? Why? Is litclub still hip and cool?

I haven't been here for a while.

>> No.2312300

Brownbear is, in my opinion the best and possibly only good tripfag in the history of this or any board. Hilarious stories, dude was a bro.
I never understood why he'd post a god-tier comedic greentext story and then people would
be like OMG KILL YOURSELF.

I love you brownbear. Please come back.
not even brownbear
captcha: brownbear forevvurr

>> No.2312304

>>2312300
Why did he leave?

>> No.2312332

>>2312304
he finally found a girl who was pretty and not slutty looking and appreciated fine literature

>> No.2312342

>>2312332
Hi hakas, at least you're still here. Is litclub still up and running?

Is that true? That he found a girl? Really?

>> No.2312379

I enjoyed his stories a lot too. I don't think he's posted since about April of last year. I have a few of his excellent stories saved.

>> No.2312381

>>2312342
>i do not get jokes

>> No.2312392
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2312392

He killed himself with tomharper in a suicide pact on /lit/club last year.

we don't like to talk about it.

>> No.2312402

Why the fuck is no-one ever on litclub anymore?

>> No.2312419

it is now

/litx

>> No.2312463

what is litclub?

>> No.2312470

>go to my local bakery
>standing in line and a girl bumps into me
>turn around thinking i know her but i don't
>she says sorry and i say it's alright, the usual stuff when this happens
>i accidentally drop a 20 pence coin and she points it out to me
>this makes more convo about how she's just looking for excuses to talk to me now!
>she see has a book in her hand
>it's The Dice Man by Luke Rhineheart
>i tell her that's one of my fav's
>she says she hasn't read it, just picked it up for her brother
>i tell her it's a good choice and turn to get my food
>she's just behind me in the queue and when im outside asks me which way im walking
>we begin to walk towards my house (she lives further on)
>she jokes asking if i'll walk her home
>i laugh and say sure
>she's pretty cute and she talks about some books
>she seems to be spouting wikipedia when talking about Naked Lunch by Burroughs
>i've read it and it's obvious she hasn't
>i ask her what it feels like to have a wealth of information available online so she can act intelligent
>she doesn't understand
>i say 'isn't it great you can talk about shit you don't actually know about with things like wikipedia?'
>she looks really upset that i called her out
>i tell her of this board and how she can go here to discuss some books and maybe learn something
>says she alreads posts here frequently as anonymous
>i am not surprised
>turn to leave, she gives me her number and a kiss on the cheek
>says her name is Lisa

Lisa if you're posting you're a pleabian and i regret talking to you. Especially when your favourite books were 'The Kite Runner', 'Catcher in the Rye' and 'Lolita'
get off the entry level shit you hipster.

>> No.2312496

>>2312470
>that feel when women try so hard to impress you

I know it

>> No.2312543

>it's beautiful outside so head out to read my book, head to a nice little cafe
>reading Under the Volcano by Malcolm Lowry
>as i sit down a girl holding a rather large book comes and talks to me
>asks if she can sit next to me
>no
>she does anyway.
>she asks me what i'm reading and i tell her
>ask her what she's reading
>Don Quixote
>almost spit my milkshake out as my body begins to seize from laughter
>ask her why she's reading it
>it's a classic
>tell her it puts the 'ass' in classic
>asks me what i think of her favourite book 'Lolita'
>tell her it's an overrated piece of shit straight from the perverted thoughts of a paedophile
>she looks a little upset and tells me she was molested as a child
>notasinglefuckwasgiventhatday
>she tells me that her 'guilty pleasure' is Terry Pratchett
>i gently remind her that he has Alzheimers and wants to commit suicide, and the reason he's making so many TV adaptations is so he can donate to them and die quicker
>tell me the escapist fantasy helped after her mum died
>laugh and tell her to stop being such a pussy
>i'm getting bored now so snort a line of cocaine
>as i feel the high setting in i slap the girl with the back of my hand and attempt to leave
>i vomit everywhere
>she shoves her number into my hand and tells me to call her
>throw my phone into the oncoming path of a bus in my euphoric haze
>come home to post on /lit/

>> No.2312554

I don't read very often, but I like the company here.

My favorite reading material is The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy Trilogy (Though I have yet to read "And Another Thing")

>> No.2312565

>>2312554
You should read The Unbearable Lightness of Being, which is surprisingly similar.

>> No.2312563

>out on the range, herding my cattle to the market several cities over
>got a few books by Witold Gombrowicz with me to read in the saddle while we saunter along
>my fellow hands are all well-versed in postmodern classics
>a sudden indian scalping party is seen on the horizon
>one of their squaws rides ahead of them and by my side as I put my book away and ready my rifle
>hey I saw you were reading a book, that's pretty cool
>get away from me
>what do you think about Henry James?
>I think I'm about two seconds away from filling your redskin nose full of shot
>well listen, I gotta get back to the party, here's the smoke signal you can send if you want to get a hold of me
>she hands me a piece of cured leather with incomprehensible savage scrawls inked on it
>I throw it on the ground as we roundabout and prepare to face the raiders

Fucking women man.

>> No.2312566

>>2312563

And I thought the /mu/ greentext stories got crazy

You guys take the plebian-patrician relationship to a whole other level

>> No.2312568

>>2312565
I'm trying to read The Eye Of The World right now but frankly I can never find the time to sit and give it a good read.

>> No.2312569
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2312569

>>2312563

>> No.2312572

>>2312568
How about, like, right now?

>> No.2312601

>>2312572
Too busy listening to The MIddle East man.

Problem with me is I like music a lot more than I like books.

But I still like books.

>> No.2312625

>>2312563

not enough spaghetti, didn't read

>> No.2313566

>head to the library to work on my short story
>finish that motherfucker but head home to edit/proof read
>fuck it im gonna grab myself a smoothie from this smoothie bar and enjoy the motherfucking glorious weather we english masterrace are having
>sit down and whip out my kindle to read 'the things they carried' by Tim O'Brien
>girl sits next to me on grass and asks what im holding
>tell her i'm holding the future
>she says she wanted to get a Nook
>tell her to grow the fuck up and get a Kindle.
>she laughs shrilly and tells me i'm funny
>im laying down and she lays on my chest to see what the screen is like
>kinda weirded out so tell her to move
>says she was sorry
>it's okay.
>getting annoyed now because i have some reading to continue
>tells me she's currently reading the Canterbury tales
>ask her how it is
>really easy i got a modern translation so i think it mak-
>cut her off there with a swift slap to the face
>tell her that she's a fucking failed abortion for reading a god damn translation
>she starts to tear up a little
>chill out, slut.
>she says she's sorry and i say it's fine
>fuck this i'm getting out of here
>try to leave and she follows me to the bus stop
>gets on the bus with me
>starts talking about her favourite book which is some piece of feminist shit
>>get the homeless man to switch seats with me for some spare change and a red elastic band
>tell her i'm leaving but my friend is here
>gives me her number and tells me to text her
>feel something rising in my throat
>open Homeless Jim's bag and vomit into it
>leave and come home

>> No.2313575

>>2313566

>smoothie and not black coffee with no sugar or cream that is darker than the darkest part of the universe

pleb

>> No.2313579
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2313579

>>2313566

>implying you wouldn't drop the kindle, firmly grasp her nether regions, and nibble on her ear.

>> No.2313587

>>2313579
I'd punch her in the gut for messing up all the books and I'VE HAD A LONG DAY AND I NEED TO SLEEP.

>> No.2313597

>>2313579
>stupid women are revolting, only Brownbear got this right

>> No.2313603

>>2313579

Books are sturdy vessels.

I suspect they'll survive the fiery wrath of a cute girl.

>> No.2313613
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2313613

>>2313597

Lack of knowledgic exposure does not equate stupidity unless you define it as such.

Personally, I do not. That is, of course, your decision.

>> No.2313627

my personal favorite


>walk into baptist church with a copy of anton lavey's "satanic bible" in tow
>nice young white girl shifts in her pew that I might alight next to her
>sit down
>she inches closer
>whispers "whatcha got there" under the booming voice of the pastor
>I show her the cover and hold a finger to my lips
>she sees the fangs of de chample's "the snake and the beast" on the cover
>"oh is that like twilight?"
>can't think of any other escape
>"pastor, I would like to be saved!"
>strut posthaste to the front of the church
>young lady follows
>"can I help him daddy?"
>"of course you can"
>she tries to take my clothes off
>at this point, I've got my joker from the dark knight face on
>"listen, you insufferable little twat. you've interrupted this man while he was in midst of a revolutionary sermon that could have saved the souls of at least the 12 men in this room from eternal damnation! how DARE you attempt to 'help' me disrobe in a mockery of this holy baptism, why, if this were one hundred years ago I could have you hung by the neck until dead"
>she's getting a little upset
>"so starbucks at nine then?"
>"starbucks is for working class laymen like yourself"
>shimmy up the cross in the front of the church and gyrate jesus's face, ironically, even though I'm a christian
>everybody flips their shit
>never return to town

pic related, except prettier and less slutty etc

>> No.2313705
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2313705

bumping for moar.

>> No.2313711

>>2313613
>>2313613
>>2313613
>>2313613

The inferiority in intelligence, if that wording should please you, was in her reading the translation of Canterbury tales, not in her lack of knowledge about them, although one could see a correlation of ignorances. The raison d'être of Brownbear.

>> No.2313717

>>2313579
>bitches can't even finish one book before starting another

Typical

>> No.2313751

>>2313579
This is just like those gamer girls who cover themselves in old videogames and controllers.