Poetry share thread

[Anonymous No.2288170]

Hey /lit/

Do we have any poets here? It would be cool to see some poetry sharing/critique. I'll offer critique if I feel I can help.

I may may post some stuff midthread, so it doesn't seem like I'm only here for myself.

[Anonymous No.2288187]

oh, I am mad about
the girl

like festering cheese
on a summer's day
she's stinking hot

oh, oh, oh

[Anonymous No.2288195]

Though 4chan is a dreadful clan,
To be avoided if you can
I'd like to meet the tripfag man:
Wait, no, I wouldn't

[Anonymous No.2288201]

Jazz, derailing of the senses of all that is whole,
shaba that all is dabeebob and will unfold,
that dibideedoop and the mold,
has yet to be told,

Shabadabadoobadibidybooop, grasshopper,

grasshopper,

hop,

hop,

hopp.ssss.ddd.ff.gggg.d.d..s.s.s.dd.f.fs.f.s.g.s.g.

and the aticulate is indescribable and shabooboodabadoobadoo.

[Anonymous No.2288205]

>>2288201
Dude, that's brilliant. Reminds me of a more refined version of an older work of mine, Turtle Blues:

Beem buddle uddle dee dum
Dum de dum de dum diddul ee dum
Dum de dum de dum diddlul ee
Diddle ee diddle ee diddle ee diddle ee
Dum be dum bum

Ba ba bee, bee bee boa baa
Ba ba ba ba ba bee, bwoah boo

[Anonymous No.2288223]

>>2288187
>>2288195
>>2288201
>>2288205

Fuck off with your shitty troll poems. Here's a serious work of mine OP, sorry about these immature fags.

It's 4am. The cold bites my bare behind.
I feel the blood rushing to my head,
and in the orange street light
my right hand blurs as it rapidly
strokes back and forward,
clutching and chafing with all its might.

A drunk girl glimpses at the trousers around my ankles
and I continue, smiling at her,
but she avoids my gaze.
Bitch.

Suddenly the phone rings.
I stop, exposing myself,
and place my hand on the cold receiver.
I pick up the phone and wait.
Nobody says anything,
but I hear breathing on the other end.

Suddenly a voice booms:
"Stop wanking you cunt!"
Luckily I don't have to -
at that moment I came all over the glass.
I slam the phone down
and pull up my trousers.

"God, you took bloody ages in there young man!"
an old woman tells me with a grin on her face.
I watch her insert a pound coin,
then walk off into the night,
determined to buy a doner kebab.

[Anonymous No.2288225]

Fags. fags. fags everywhere.

Fags on the stairs.

Fags riding bears.

Fags eating pears.

Fags.

[Anonymous No.2288228]

>>2288225
>fags riding bears
Allusion to Tao Lin?
http://www.bearparade.com/thisemotionwasalittlee-book/2006/03/a_poem_written_by_a_bear.html

[Anonymous No.2288236]

The naming of fags is a difficult matter,
It isn't just one of your holiday games;
You may think at first I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you, a fag must have three different names
First of all, there's the name that the family use daily,
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James,
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey--
All of them sensible everyday names.
There are fancier names if you think they sound sweeter,
Some for the gentleman, some for the dames:
Such as Plato, Admetus, Electra, Demeter--
But all of them sensible everyday names.
But I tell you, a fag needs a name that's particular,
A name that's peculiar, and more dignified,
Else how can he keep up his cock perpendicular,
Or spread out his anus or cherish his ride?
Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum,
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricofag,
Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum-
Names that never belong to more than one fag.
But above and beyond there's still one name left over,
And that is the name that you never will guess;
The name that no human research can discover--
But THE FAG HIMSELF KNOWS, and will never confess.
When you notice a fag in profound masturbation,
The reason, I tell you, is always the same:
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation
Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name:
His ineffable effable
Effanineffable
Deep and inscrutable singular Name.

[Anonymous No.2288237]

lololol no

[Anonymous No.2288242]

>>2288228

i actually liked this a lot up until the last line

wrestling with authenticity is so pedestrian

[Anonymous No.2288255]

>>2288242
I quite like it as well - it's charming and funny. You're right about the last line.

[Anonymous No.2288261]

>>2288236
Ohh, this is from Cats. I was wondering why there was a well-executed piece of humorous writing on /lit/.

[Anonymous No.2288425]

Okay, one bump. Hopefully something decent might turn up, but... I doubt it.

[Anonymous No.2288450]

Do you like this, even a little?
-

Today
the piano is unspeakably sad,
but you move like white petals
unstrung in the cool dark.

Feed me;
I ache and slumber.

Stay impossible.

Who would push from them
beautiful things?
I lick the electric mist
of your ricepaper shades.

Poking holes with my tongue
in the lighted window
of your sighs,

I wish to see

[Anonymous No.2288453]

I'll just post the first part.

1. we grow a forest of guns wildfire in our wake

She said,
you are a raven in the throes of salvation.

Your lips pomelo
fruiting into silence.

The only reason I shave you feather-like, pruning a fruit tree,
carving a bird of stone, is so I can pretend

I had a hand
in your creation.

Tilt me gunfire,

fast as us fucking
hard as regret,
shiny as valour.

Tell me you will miss me
Nevermore.

[Anonymous No.2288457]

Lisbeth Salander

[Anonymous No.2288464]

>>2288225
I like it. Seriously.

[Anonymous No.2288473]

>>2288453
Tumblr fag.

http://wristswings.tumblr.com/

[Anonymous No.2288489]

>>2288473
Tumblr fag.

[Anonymous No.2288490]

>>2288450
I was trying to post about your poem, but it keeps saying my comment isn't allowed. It's in the picture instead.

[Anonymous No.2288491]

Each one of these suck. Post them on OKCupid and fuck off

[Anonymous No.2288523]

>>2288490
Thanks, wasn't expecting that. Yeah, the link between those lines isn't that strong. It's to do with not wanting to distance yourself and getting closer, I suppose. Hence the licking ricepaper thing. Vagueness is a curse.

[Anonymous No.2288525]

I've been working on a surreal sestina that's made up of one huge sentence. I don't know how to judge the quality my experiment.

[Anonymous No.2288535]

>>2288525
Why make it one long sentence?

[Anonymous No.2288542]

>>2288535
It was supposed to create a stream of consciousness effect. I've been reading Thomas Bernhard and he quite likes his long sentences. I guess it influenced me.

[Anonymous No.2288675]

bump