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/lit/ - Literature

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22467560 No.22467560 [Reply] [Original]

I'm in my early 30s. I'm an ugly beta male. I've had no friends since school and no experiences with women ever (dates, even flirting, or had any interest shown in me) apart from prostitutes.

I become the beta male at the bottom of any social circle I come in contact with. This includes being invited to no parties and not going to prom or school leaving parties during the final days of school. And having no social life at all during university. And being the ugly beta nobody talks to during all of my part time jobs in university summers and later full time jobs after university.

People are repulsed by me.

I have no interesting hobbies or passions in life. My main hobbies for the past 5+ years have been mindlessly browsing the internet, exercising, binging on junk food or coffee, or driving and going for aimless walks. I've read more books than the average person but I'm not overly interested in anything.

I failed an absolute shitload of graduate intern and job interviews and was in menial work after university. I eventually managed to get some good jobs and now I'm paid an ok salary (much more than the UK average but that is shit tier, so it's not saying much; and not high at the company I work at).

I'm not a posh person or a generic middle class person and do not fit in with these people. I am not a lower class person and don't fit in with these people.

I can tell from my jobs that people think lowly of me, no matter what I do. In my previous job I had multiple managers treat me like shit and tell me I didn't fit in.

I managed to escape to my current job, which pays more. But I can see myself not being promoted ever. The workplace is also more ruthless, so I could potentially be treated worse than before if people dislike me.

Normies fit in effortlessly and easily glide through normie filled institutions where they're judged solely on their normieness.

I'm not stupid enough to believe in any religions or any philosophies of life.

>> No.22467566

>>22467560
>total failure of will and paralyzing bitterness
The communist manifesto
The bible

>> No.22467568

>>22467560
Did your post on /fit/ get deleted?

>> No.22467577

>>22467560
Didn't read your blog post. Just saw the pic in the catalog and figured I'd pop in to tell you to go ahead and kill yourself. I said the same thing on /fit too.

>> No.22467583

This thread was first posted on Sep 1 2022:
>>/lit/thread/S20927226
Then reposted on Sep 27 2022:
>>/lit/thread/S21048876

>> No.22467585

>>22467560
>I'm not stupid enough to believe in any religions or any philosophies of life.
There's your problem. So just become more stupid.

>> No.22467673

>>22467560
Stop what you're doing and call a friend or family member. Tell them how you're feeling if you can manage it, but if that's not on the table even just making basic conversation, catching up is a very good idea. Why? Because you are clearly in a depressive state and in these moments you need to be heard, by someone else who cares about you, in some kind of capacity. If you don't feel like telling them all this then after talking to them write it all in a notebook without a filter or threads like this or WWOYM. Then, think about whether you have depression or if you're living in a way that is making you depressed. The two are obviously not mutually exclusive, but if it's the latter you should make small, gradual changes to your life that will allow you to feel better. If it's the former get yourself to a therapist/psychiatrist ASAP. I have symptoms of depression but I know that it's down to my lifestyle, and I'm making progress because I have chosen, now that the pain has somewhat alleviated, to make changes for the better. Good luck, anon. I believe in you.

>> No.22467682

>>22467560
>I'm not stupid enough to believe in any religions or any philosophies of life.
That's too bad because Christ, his Church, his Mother, and saints will not judge you for petty reasons like the world does.

>> No.22467687

>>22467560

If you do not confirm you are left out to die. You're lucky to have a decent job. It's too late to repair your life, you need to settle with what you can get

>> No.22467706

lots of newfags in this thread who don't realize that Londonfrog has been posting on /lit/ for about 7 years now

>> No.22467874

>>22467585
this
give yourself brain damage with drugs, that's what I did and my faith in the creator is now unwavering

>> No.22467893

>>22467687
Yeah my advice is you should listen to subdivisions by rush

>> No.22467979

>>22467560
Literally me in 8 years

>> No.22467990

>>22467560
>I'm not stupid enough to believe in any religions or any philosophies of life.
Ironically this is the root cause of your mindset.

>> No.22468043

Either/Or - Kierkegaard
Kierkegaard in general actually

>> No.22468047

Alan Harrington's ''The Secret Swinger''.

>> No.22468431

>>22467560

"Extension du domaine de la lutte" by Michel Houellebecq.