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/lit/ - Literature

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2233087 No.2233087 [Reply] [Original]

>start writing a poem in the evening
>Its coming along quite well
>Stop and go to bed
>Can't sleep because im just thinking of that poem
>Stay up all night in a creative frenzy writing
>Can hardly work during the day, feel ill, even vomit
>Come home
>Open up the notebook
>MY POEM IS SHIT
>mfw when

>> No.2233092

POST IT.

>> No.2233093

>>2233087
that's happened to me. two of my favorite poems were written while i was taking a shit. wrote them in about ten minutes each then edited during the next few poops i took. the time i have on the toilet has my mind naturally clear. it was a nice discovery.

>> No.2233094

let us see it.

>> No.2233097

I spent this whole afternoon writing a poem today. It's too early to tell if I hate it or not, but I don't feel very excited about it. It can be quite boring, writing, but sometimes I just have to write something down, you know?

>> No.2233096

>>2233092
>>2233094
No. Because its bad. And I dont publish bad work. I will publish it when its finished. Like hell im giving up on it.

>> No.2233101

>>2233096

YOU ARE Anonymous, RUBE.

>> No.2233102

>Implying poetry itself isn't shit.

>> No.2233104

>>2233102

you should read more book

>> No.2233108

>>2233087
Vomit from lack of sleep? What? What kind of poison ridden shit do you eat and drink?

>> No.2233109

>>2233101
Yeah, but when it's done i want to submit it TAR.
And I dont want anyone stealing it.

Also: Its my first poem ever.

>> No.2233110

>>2233108
>>2233108
>>2233108
When I dont sleep much. I chainsmoke cigarettes to feel bad and dont eat because its makes me feel like shit and stay awake. Its odd I know, but it works.

>> No.2233118

>>2233110
>it works
>vomit
Obviously it doesn't, lol. Have you ever taken 5-hour energy? It works like a charm, though a little bit of Adderall or other amphetamine wouldn't hurt either. Amphetamines reduce your appetite too, which could be good or bad depending on whether you are able to eat when you know you need to eat or not. Foods like vegetables, crackers, and ginger ale would be reccomended.

I've pulled so many all-nighters that I've almost turned it into a science.

>> No.2233122

>>2233118
I dont do drugs. I have epilepsy. Staying up all night isnt a good idea even to begin with.

Im saving my epilepsy related death after my written Magnus Opum.

>> No.2233125

Fuck it should I post it?

>> No.2233128

OKEY OKEY...IM FUCKING DOING IT!

>> No.2233133

Imperium of Man

With worn down soles and a wary head
I spot a spaceship — docking — in my bed.
Hold tight, grip the corner of the cushy helm.
Ignite, that last remaining gray matter cell.
T-minus five, four, three...
A lone explorer head out, for bounty on a boundless sea.

With eyes wide shut I rest my head
on the violet rim stretching deep,
dipping my feets in the aquaous blue terra sky,
while scraping a finer nuance of black
from the darkened void above with the tip of my fingernail.

It's easy.
Infinite our choice - however it may be.
Like newborn baby stars exploding,
synapses fuse and lit up the galaxy.

Just follow the red carpet
laid out by the standing army of excited atoms
dancing to my pipers tune and big bangs.
How can the sound from one mans broken drum,
breathe life — where it ain't supposed to be none?
I feel the rhytm from Descartes beats as Zarathustras crys are deafened.

I am, that clustering milky dust revolving round the centre of massive black holes,
and even the tiniest surge from gamma rays passing moons named from gods of old.
I am all, there'll ever be.

What shores undreamt of have I yet to become,
what bedrock have not been cooled by my wake?
From humble origins? I ask, knowingly a wiser fools belief.
"I, descendent from a single cell — there is nothing I can't achieve"
As the cosmos lie sleeping with it's giant ears resting on its paws,
I race the last light beams from an old dying sun.
Yelling, screaming and hollering.
No particle in universe reach further than mine!

>> No.2233134
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2233134

>spend 15 minutes writing a poem made out of other people's tweets
>submit it to an online literary journal
>it gets published
>mfw

>> No.2233137

>>2233122
Okee doke.

And for the record, I don't "do drugs" either. I have a prescription for my ADD.

>> No.2233139
File: 405 KB, 244x302, RYRY1998.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
2233139

>>2233134

HAHA HA, GOOD ONE.

>> No.2233141

>>2233137

Technically, you're still 'doing drugs', only not for the sake of 'doing drugs', but for your condition.
Btw, not OP, and no offense meant.

>> No.2233143

>>2233133
no one? whaddya think

>> No.2233150

>>2233134
Just so we're clear.
Internet Poetry is not an online literary journal. It's a place for Steve Roggenbuck to get support for his autistic ideas.

>> No.2233149

>>2233143

read basho

take notes

>> No.2233154

>>2233149
How about an actual constructive criticism.
What should I learn from Haikus?

>> No.2233155

I did something similar recently...I wouldn't say it's shit, it's my favourite of all the poems I've ever finished...but looking back at it I am wondering whether or not it's a big, steaming pile of turd or not. I know it's not great, but I'm considering sending it off to a journal or some shit, just can't decide whether or not I will be embarrassed if I do.

>> No.2233156

>>2233154

succinctness; finding grand ideas in small moments; striking imagery; etc etc

>> No.2233158

>>2233156
I liked it.

>> No.2233161

Publish poem. No one says anything ;_;

>> No.2233167

>>2233161

dude, i'm giving you some solid ass advice

what your pome basically does is recapitulate in about a kajillion words the notions existentialists have been kicking around for years and years

don't get me wrong -- recapitulating an important idea is a cool thing for a pome to do -- but we've all heard this "people are so tiny the universe is so vast choice is infinite" line before. we've all seen the ccalvin and hobbes comic where they're looking at the night sky

get out your microscope instead of your telescope. tell us about a time that you personally felt this way. give us something that no other poet could have

>> No.2233172

maybe not very interesting? surely there are poetry forums available on internet? maybe it's a smashing poem to some. not to me. maybe to me in another state. not now. didn't even care to read it properly. it didn't catch my attention. rape and facerape would have.

>> No.2233176

>>2233167
Poem is not about how small we are.
It's rather the opposite.
Did you read the poem?

>> No.2233181

>>2233176

hopeless.

>> No.2233269

>>2233176
>>2233176

No, no, he gets that. What he's saying (I think) is that you need to approach from a *personally* significant approach. That way it's guaranteed to be unique even though the subject has been done countless times. Ya know, explore the universal through the particular.

>> No.2233271

>>2233150

don't ruin my fun, bro

>> No.2233272

>>2233150

also, it was 'poetry by emily dickinson'. real damn close though, kudos

>> No.2233273

>2011
>caring about poems


wow, I honestly assume you gentlemen don't engage in such behavior

>> No.2233277

Okey, how about we take it from the top.
This is literally my first poem ever written.

Is is 1/10 or what?
Doesn't even pass as poetry
How shitty poetry?
Sublit or on par with /lit/

etc..
Making things personal comes with practice I guess.

>> No.2233281

>>2233272
I realised it was Poetry by Emily Dickinson after posting and couldn't be assed correcting it.
Still basically a Steve Roggenbuck thing.
I actually like Flarf

>> No.2233287

>>2233277
it's meh but it's not the absolute worst i've ever seen

>> No.2233290

>>2233273

>2011
>making prescriptive claims

i seriously hope you gentlemen dong tits anal blood spray

>> No.2233289

>>2233281

flarfing is pretty cool. i saw a vid where steve read a book of flarf poetry by someone i can't remember, and i remember it being pretty cool and more than just the funny one-liners steve is really known for. i'll have to try and remember the author at some point and check him out properly

>> No.2233293

>>2233287

IT IS WORST

>> No.2233300

>>2233289
I think Steve's a pretty cool guy.
His internet presence is absurd though. He seems to be everywhere.

I need to get boosed like him so i can have that kind of presence.

>> No.2233307

>>2233300

lol you should add him on twitter. he's really friendly and he'll talk to you if you want to (or even if you don't want to sometimes).

>> No.2233317

>>2233133
I liked it

>> No.2233319
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2233319

>>2233307
>that feel when your socially retarded and your twitter presence is non-existant.

>> No.2233329

>>2233319
No one likes you here either.

Kill yourself.

>> No.2233337

>>2233329
i actually think slaf is interesting because he's pretty much a non-entity. he's so bland and uninteresting that he can hide in plain sight.

>> No.2233340

>>2233319

lulz just do that #teamfollowback thing, gain a few hundred followers, then unfollow them all and delete all your tweets. people will see all your followers and think you have something worth saying then.

honestly, i wish that's what i had done.

>> No.2233342

>>2233329
4chan has too many belligerent assholes. It would be much better if you killed yourself.

Also, SLAF reads more contemporary literature than most of /lit/, which makes him interesting.

>> No.2233346

>>2233342

agreed

>> No.2233350
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2233350

>>2233346
>>2233342

most painful samefag i've seen in my life

check out these /lit/-related identical last two post # digits which represent the mindlessly mundane mannerisms permeating this awful board

>> No.2233351

>>2233133
This is actually quite good.
A lot of small references to Shakespeare, Mayakowsky, Stanley Rubrick and more noticable Descartes and Nietschze. Carl Sagan perhaps (Cosmos), Darwin

This is an ode to science and human mind, kinda in the sense that we can't see the end of the universe but travel there in the blink of an eye with our mind.

There are so much within physics that man simply only know theoretical and in that sense we create the universe as we at the same time comes from the particles from exploding supernovas.

Some nice transitions as well.
Talking about worn out soles and wary head, laters dips his feet and rest his head.

First a blackened void then the synapses lighting the galaxy.

Like this one "Pipers tunes and big-bangs" and then goes on to talk about drums.

Nice finish also.

Cocky and respectful at the same time.