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/lit/ - Literature

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21945118 No.21945118 [Reply] [Original]

How to get a gf who reads?

>> No.21945129

>>21945118
1. Go to a university, particularly the Literature Department
2. Drug one of the female students at an event (usually one of those readings they do), e.g., stuff in her drink
3. Hypnotise her when she's out of it, and tell her that you are twin flames. Perform a bonding ritual by burning a lock of her hair in a candle and extinguish the flame with your semen.
4. Wait for her to fall in love with you.

>> No.21945138

ever tried being rich and tall? works for me every time

thing is, if you even have to ask, you are absolutely never gonna make it
you are like a shriveled paralyzed cripple with aids and cancer asking 'which books do i read to bench 200 kilos'
it doesnt matter buddy
all your shit is so wrong, you might as well unironically kill yourself

>> No.21945163 [DELETED] 

>>21945138
Yet you're here bragging to neets on a Saturday night.

>> No.21945175

>>21945129
You just know some Evola dweeb is gonna try this and complain here when he burns his dick during the spooge ritual.

>> No.21945194

>>21945118
one thing I've noticed is that no matter how read or educated a woman is, she is far less intellectually gifted than the common man

>> No.21945203

>>21945118
Well, the first step is to meet people and then...uh I haven't really gotten to that point yet so I don't know anything past that step. I imagine it has to do with getting to know the people you meet or something.

>> No.21945242

>>21945118
I just care about the booba

>> No.21945282

Stop making this thread.

>> No.21945493

>>21945118
shes not even reading

>> No.21945500

Have you tried getting a bf instead?

>> No.21945525

>>21945493
The only thing she needs to be reading is the smut I'm going to write about her. I'd gladly suck out all the spit from her tempting little mouth, slathering all over with my tongue until I slurp out every last drop of succulence inside those ruby red lips.
Next, I'll have her knelt over my knee as she feels this sticking, hard erection of a micropenis jut betwixt those mammary glands, its milk like Arcadian nectar for the demigods. And, in this position, I shall pull down those dark pants to reveal a tight, little arse with its puckering lips of an arsehole readied to be ravished by my searching thumb. Going in at the first knuckle, swivelling about with my nail, until I get to the last knuckle and burrow in like a mole going down into the depths of a fecund garden. I'll command her to dookie on my palm, and I'll savour every last speck of it as I mash it in my mouth. I'll plant a kiss on her as I force her to french kiss me.
Then, I'll drink a gourd of sweet wine, having turned her about to expose that angelic face. I'll piss with every last drop of my bladder into her upturned face, her mouth agape, as I sprinkle stinking piss from my little micropenis. She'll have to gargle and guzzle it, as I slap her about with my shit-smeared hands. Then I'll bring out the snorkel, for you know what.

>> No.21945528

>>21945525
can you elaborate im not sure i follow

>> No.21945536

>>21945118
>>21945242
I'm pretty sure those are fakes. You wouldn't like them. They'd be hard like apples, not soft, like overripe melons.

>> No.21945545

you can never understand a women's mind enough to ever be able to construct more than an external ego of her in your mind, because as a man you do not share the same fundemental unknowable assumptions that distort both your realities, so why would you want a women in particular for the task of discussing ideas when it's counterproductive to it? you would be better off talking to yourself

>> No.21945553

>>21945545

I'd just want a cute girl to read beside man, nothing too complicated.

>> No.21945566

>>21945553
sorry I thought you meant a /lit/ GF, which is impossible, but having a women who enjoys the same form of entertainment as you is possible, just don't expect more, and expect to be furious at times at her opinions. if you decide to further this, see the other kind posters

>> No.21945586

*ahem*

SEXOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>> No.21945589
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21945589

>>21945586
>*ahem*
>SEXOOOOOOOOOOOOO

>> No.21945591

>>21945566

Yeah man. I don't need more. I need to feel some warmth beside me and hear some soft breathing. Smell some feminine smells I'm not familiar with and have some good sex.

>> No.21945601

>>21945591
if you look for warmth, you shall never find it
>For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it.

>> No.21945608

>>21945601

Okay fine I want a corpse to take out of the freezer now and then.

>> No.21945616

>>21945608
the man of opposition is as much a slave as the man of submission

>> No.21945646

>>21945616

Fuck off already

>> No.21945653

>>21945646
Ecclesiastes 12

>> No.21945656

>>21945118
>not a man
pass

>> No.21945661

There are only 3 women in my class. All of them are as unnatractive as it gets. The least ugly one is an insufferable bitch with a horrible personality. Something vaguely resembling an attractive ass is attached to her dumpy body. No tits. Chubby in the most unappealing sense of the word.
Most of my classmates talk of her as if she were the hottest woman on the planet. Some of them are even interested in starting a relationship with her.

It's been a long, long time since I've seen a woman as beatiful as the one in OP's pic in real life. Such a delightful body and angelical face. I don't know anything about her, but I wish I made her smile like that. I wish I could hear her voice, her laughter. Just being around her would made me happy. Even if I never talked to her at all, sharing space with a gorgeous woman is always a joy.

I have never seen a woman like that in real life. Not even close! This woman is so foreign to me, or rather, her perfect beauty. It somehow doesn't feel real to me. Feels like looking at the photo of a celebrity or an AI generated picture.

It's sobering thought.

>> No.21945704

>>21945661
A sobering thought is that u should talk to women irl

>> No.21945707

>>21945118
read a lot, also be rich and tall. The things you should have already been doing

>> No.21945710

>>21945704
I talk to women.
But not a single one of them looks like that .

>> No.21945712

>>21945710
They will introduce you to more women. there's fuckin millions of them

>> No.21945729

>>21945712
I live in a different reality to women like that, so to speak.
Look at her skin and her clothes, she obviously comes from money. Good genes all around.
I'm fucking poor, is what I'm coming to realize. Poorer than I imagined. I can't connect with women like these through other women because they simply are not part of the same world.
If you interact with women similar to the one in OP's pic,tell me what their environment is like.

>> No.21945732

>>21945175
YWNBAW

>> No.21945761

>>21945118
Two options:
1) Get a girlfriend and introduce her to your hobby. Ideally frame it as part of her already existing hobby - does she like /tv/? Show her that her favorite piece of media is based on a book - be it GoT or Orange is the new Black. Is she into /x/? Aliens, mysteries, occult books. Is she a filthy perv? Present it as a part of bdsm play - order her to read the book and then quiz her on it, with possible punishment for getting a failing grade.

2) Find a girl who reads and make her your girlfriend. Your university or workplace most likely has a book club or book swap, your local library might run interesting events, look for girls there, discuss their favorites, show them yours. Don't be an "actually..." faggot and let girls have their own opinions, let her sperg. Offer to be her beta reader, if she is an aspiring writer. Ask her to be your beta reader. Bond over a common hobby and profit.

Also know where you stand in the looks department. Elegant lady wouldn't fall for an ugly guy - but there are always exceptions, her taste in books might help you, beauty and the beast is a trope for a reason.

>> No.21945767

>>21945729
You may be fucking poor, but you're definitely fucking horny. Hornier than you imagined.
She is hot I'll give u that but you should focus less on pictures and more on irl people unless u want to legit die a virgin.

>> No.21945791

>>21945661
where the hell do you live?
move away FAST

>> No.21945795

>>21945767
I'm not a virgin dude. I've had sex many times, but not with a woman as hot/pretty as that.
Not only because I am shy or whatever, but because there literary are none like that around.

>>21945791
Where do the pretty people live, anon?

>> No.21945806

>>21945118
most college educated girls read, problem is that they mostly read ya or fotm shit

>> No.21945837

>>21945138
You are deeply hurting

>> No.21945838

Why can't this board stop talking about women?

>> No.21945858

>>21945661
>It's been a long, long time since I've seen a woman as beatiful as the one in OP's pic in real life
lmao just walk outside

>> No.21945863

>>21945795
>Where do the pretty people live, anon?
The city, basically. It was the first real spring day yesterday, I was chilling in the park and it was packed with women as attractive, if not more attractive than her.

When I see people talking about hurr where did the real women go and hurr trannies everywhere I always have to imagine some loser Chud in a flyover state with a big truck and a house made of painted wood and drywall inside. Try not living in a depressing shithole before complaining about the world first.

>> No.21945872

>>21945838
These feminist-brained, sexy sluts need a dicking down, if I may say so. They need to be tied up in stalls and fucked hard until they either scream out for relief, or otherwise buckle and shiver with the painful orgasms brought on by the well-endowed literati who browse this site. They should be milked if they lactate during pregnancy and fed a diet of cum-covered chicken breast basted with eggs and milk, in order that their female hormones sky rocket. As they ovulate, a tiny little man not unlike Michel Houellebecq will go down the rows of stables with a clip board in hand, and mark each one readied to be pumped full of the Ouranos-like sea-foam that we store in our sacks, with semen to make tomorrow's Shelleys, Rimbauds, and Homers. And when each anon here takes their turn filling them with enough cum to fill a Grecian urn, we will keep the babes in swaddled form and leave them to the elements. If one survives, either by chance, or being saved by the wild wolves, then they shall be crowned L'Enfant Sauvage d'Occident et Le Roi de /lit/.

>> No.21945886
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21945886

>>21945118
>(((Schwartz)))

>> No.21945960

>>21945118
It’s hilarious how her face says “wow how embarrassing, imagine being thirty”
While she’s completely unaware that the same thing is gonna happen to her

>> No.21945962

>>21945960
She might kill herself before 30 if the SSRI side effects get too bad and she can't take it anymore.

>> No.21946058

What's the source?

>> No.21946136

>>21945872
It's surreal. As I get older (late twenties) I've mysteriously started to find lactation and pregnancy hot when it was just another weird fetish to me before.

>> No.21946149

>>21945586
agreed

>> No.21946150
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21946150

>Let's go to the repository of knowledge~
>What will I wear?~ I know~ Something to distract men (who produce almost all the knowledge) with unconscious thoughts of fucking me~

>> No.21946152
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21946152

>>21946150
kek'd

>> No.21946200

>>21945525
What did he mean by this?

>> No.21946204

First of all, lower your standards, pretty girls who read are one in a million, and you are not finding that specific one, second of all, pretend to like whatever the fuck she reads, The Secret History, No Longer Human, Kafka (the usual things this sort reads). When you start with what I just mentioned, you then talk about what you like and love, because people naturally look attractive when they talk about whatever it is you like, charisma and decent looks are required for this as well. Eventually you will realize this is an awfully tough task so you will either settle for something lesser than what you originally wanted, normal girl, listening to nigger songs, nothing particularly interesting, or fuck off and start writing, like I did. Just fucking write a book or something.

>> No.21946212

>>21945118
I don't know how you get one that already reads but I got my girlfriend into reading by finding romance graphic novels that center around her interests (horse back riding in this case, so cowboy romance comics). Once I did that she found some she liked outside of just her interests and got her more interested in genre. Now she is reading that court series by sarah maas. I think I can easily move her from that into something like abarat or narnia and from there into some real mythology and maybe even a bit of mythic poetry. Of course that took a bit of reading some shit that Im not super into but compromise is usually how you get anything out of life so, fuck it we ball.

>> No.21946223

>>21946204
The instant a woman starts talking about music as if it's a real hobby I just want to barf and blow my brains out. "Music hobbyists" are the biggest fucking women already as it is, just anyone so stupid and spiritually weak that they can think their faggoty LISTENING TO "ALBUMS" and having "feelings" is a hobby, that is internally differentiated enough to be talked about in the same way as outdoorsmanship or fixing up cars or reading. As if other people are interested in the specifics and vicissitudes of you PUTTING ON SOME MUSIC ON YOUR FUCKING WOMAN MACBOOK COMPUTER and passively listening to it, and feeling feelings and going "this relates to my gay boring life as a 22 year old guy... I've got dreams you know.." These are already the gayest people on the planet, disgusting fucking twinks who say shit like "vibing." And then you have women, who invented "vibing" and passively "feeling" things and having vague mushy self-indulgent thoughts about their boring empty mushy emotional lives and thinking anyone else gives a shit.

A woman coming up to me and saying "I'm actually really into music" and parting her lips as if she's about to say more things about her "tastes" in music is like a little retarded kid coming up to me holding out a piece of fresh shit that could only have come from an adult man and asking for my help. I'm immediately in a bind and I just want him to go away. I don't want to know more, I don't want to know the story, I don't want ANY PART of any aspect of what's going on, I hate children, I hate retards, I hate shit, I hate helping, I hate this kids' parents for causing this situation directly and indirectly, I hate society for allowing this to be a thing that can occur in the first place by allowing this kids' parents to exist, I just want it to be over, but I know the suffering is only beginning.

>> No.21946226

>>21946223
based

>> No.21946254

>>21946223
I don't talk to women so I have no idea what you're saying but I guess you're based.

>> No.21946291
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21946291

>>21945795
Brother you got to go to Colombia, Mexico or Brazil then buy an escort. You'll see so many causal nice 8/10s (by American standards) which will cold reboot all your perceptions. Predictably your too autistic for walking on any big city university campus or going to a party. Reading literature is not gonna solve this, requires blasting out of your flyover state for a week.

>> No.21946297

>>21946291

The world would be a better place if the was Latina Hooker visa programs.

>> No.21946320

>>21945886
>(((Literally any German name)))

>> No.21946334

>>21946223
>just anyone so stupid and spiritually weak that they can think their faggoty LISTENING TO "ALBUMS" and having "feelings" is a hobby,
Someone wasn't graced by the muses

>> No.21946342 [DELETED] 

Ah yes, rape women

>> No.21946362

>>21946223
>t. got made fun of by a female for only listening to dadrock / VGM

>> No.21946380

>>21945661
>I don't know anything about her,
She's an Instagram and OnlyFans whore that takes frequent trips to Dubai.

>> No.21946385

>>21946380
Give me a name
>Frequent trips to Dubai
Based. The real blackpill was poverty all along

>> No.21946392

>>21946385
I think it's Michele Alves. Could be wrong though.

>> No.21946472

>>21946223
real

>> No.21946482

>>21945118
Can we ban thread like this?
It’s fucking annoying to be surrounded by worshipper and brain dead coomer that just repeat the same meme, over and over again.

>> No.21946490

>>21946482
You mean ban trannies? Society is working on it but the autoimmune response is taking a while to kick in

>> No.21946700

>>21945732
Dickburner detected.

>> No.21946851

>>21946320
>implying

>> No.21946864

Just like all other gfs you either meet her in school or at parties your friends invited her to

>> No.21946951

>>21946482
>surrounded by worshipper and brain dead coomer
It's more annoying to be surrounded by brain dead misogynists and misanthropes

>>21946490
>Trannies and jews! Trannies and jews! Trannies and jews! Trannies and jewwwwwzs!
rent free

>> No.21947971

>>21945129
1. Go to a university, particularly the Literature Department
2. Denude yourself
3. Now you can say that many girls who read had seen your naked body

>> No.21948023

>>21946223
I don't know if it's still considered cool to hate women but just in case, I'm calling based