/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.2187008]

The last author you read has written a book about the last video game you played.

Try and post an excerpt.

>Joseph Conrad's "Metroid"
>The pirate surrendered it's last painful exhale into the embalming black of the crater, and she could only wish the same for it's kindred. The cold seemed to hurry their work. She felt in her an absence of remorse. The Chozo were gone. She could do nothing for them, She could only exercise what skills that that race had given her. So she did. A blue light cut into to black of the Zebesian sky as one by one she maimed and crippled every last one of their kind. She had hoped to see one offer a gesture of pathetic surrender, a plea for mercy, just so she could refuse it and send it's body into to dust of the desecrated plane.

[Anonymous No.2187031]

Advance Wars Dual Strike by Henry James

>wut

[Anonymous No.2187045]

Modern Warfare by J.K. Rowling

[Anonymous No.2187049]

>>2187008

Ursela Le Guin on, uh....GTA: SA? (it's been a while)

....I might come back and do this, but for now....

[Anonymous No.2187052]

>>2187031
>>2187049
WOULD READ

>Assassin's Creed 2, by Alexandre Dumas
Would also read.

[Tuan Jim !Y6d4OyAkDM No.2187057]

>>2187008
That was really awesome.

[Anonymous No.2187060]

>Margret Atwood's Duke Nukem 3D

I have a feeling that it would be somehow have less subtle sexual metaphors than the game.

[Anonymous No.2187063]

Camus, Deus Ex Human Revolution

>MOTHER died today. Or, maybe, yesterday; I can’t be sure. The telegram from the Home says: YOUR MOTHER PASSED AWAY. FUNERAL TOMORROW. DEEP SYMPATHY. I never asked for this. Which leaves the matter doubtful; it could have been yesterday

yeah I don't have imagination, deal with it

[Anonymous No.2187067]

>>2187060
Same exact story, except you're supposed to dislike Duke for using women.

[The Importance of Being On Time and Being No.2187098]

Same guy as before.
>>2187052
Well, if it's what the people want:

I'll make my report as if I told a story, for I was taught in my home town that Truth is a matter of the imagination. I arrived in San Andreas in the rain. The buildings here are low and gritty, riddled with bullet holes and a general atmosphere of corruption. I suspected the people of this settlement would be similarly distraught and grim. I met with my homie OB the next day, on Yrny Susmy. He told me we were slinging a bag of rock today. I suspected that the society in this region is built upon this 'rock', a gritty white substance that envelopes the mind and is greatly addictive. We journeyed out in one of his land vehicles. It appeared to be in a dilapidated state, but from what I have seen, this state is the norm. Perhaps it is part of the culture to abuse your mode of transport in this manner. Perhaps it's part of some ritual or mode of attraction... and on and on, you get it.

[Anonymous No.2187104]

Haruki Murakami wrote the Binding of Isaac?

That would actually make sense. Just replace the basement with a well.

[Anonymous No.2187114]

Hemingway writes "Super Mario World"

>Mario walked out of Yoshi's house and went to the first castle. He found Iggy on a big green platform floating in the lava, rod in hand.

>"Why do you do this, Iggy?" said Mario.

>"It's all I get pleasure from now," said Iggy.

>"You can change. We can get help. Toad knows somebody. You don't need to grab your rod every day."

>"No. This power is mine, for no one else."

>"I'm sorry, Iggy."

>The platform was hot and the rod throbbing as Iggy sank under the lava.

[Anonymous No.2187120]

China Mieville's FFIV

Pretty much the same story, but with more sex, and some of the deaths might actually stick. Expect monsters to be described either as bathetic or puissant.

[The Importance of Being On Time and Being No.2187124]

>>2187114
You forgot
>Mario walked out of Yoshi's house and went to the first castle. It was there.

[Anonymous No.2187126]

>>2187008
>The pirate surrendered it is last painful exhale into the embalming black of the crater, and she could only wish the same for it is kindred.

[Anonymous No.2187128]

>Nathaniel Hawthorne's "Pokemon"

Haha oh wow, I'll try in a bit.

[Anonymous No.2187135]

Ghost Trick by Haruki Murakami.

I'd read it.

[Anonymous No.2187144]

>>2187135

Are we 1Q84 bros?

Please say we're 1Q84 bros.

[Peter_Panties !!eqCqUpIrrGI No.2187146]

>>2187008
Props for mentioning Conrad.

That is all.

[Anonymous No.2187150]

>>2187144
I've never read it. I'm so sorry, anon. But if 1Q84 is anything like Ghost Trick, I will find a copy of the book as soon as I can, and I'll read it.

[Tuan Jim !Y6d4OyAkDM No.2187164]

Joyce's Batman: Arkham City
Oh Fuck, I'll give it a try...

>Batmansulem. Did you, my fine fellow? Joker's soap out of the the bag. Five and four pence. Melodious revolver blasts upon the Two-Faced Arses. The squeaks and breaks. Any good? And in the asylum we set down the Robinbird with full fair cheer and Thanks be to the Almighty God.Extra saltum ludentis vespertiliones. Ruing the mother's death in therefore, everyman's totter upon those volumptuousityousos. Wearing Blue for luck. Wearing Black for stealth. Smoke over the eyes so he can't see. Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes.

[Anonymous No.2187169]

Tao Lin - Modern Warfare 3.

Soap McTavish gets depressed.

[The Importance of Being On Time and Being No.2187172]

>>2187164
Lol'd

[Anonymous No.2187176]

>>2187164
>He bought Arkham Asylum
Enjoy never being able to complain about currupt game practices ever again bro.

[Deist !!gQNpRtZ1uG0 No.2187177]

Weldon Kees'(s) 'Valkyria Chronicles'


A sprawling travelogue documenting an insect enthusiast's rise to glory within the Squad 7 of the Gallian Malitia. Many passages will make extensive use of the flora and natural life in providing a backdrop for battles. A love blossoms on the battlefield. And at the end of it all our tragic hero will disappear without a trace, leaving only a sketch pad and journal entries as tokens to those he commanded with grace.

[Anonymous No.2187185]

T S Eliot's 'Call of Duty: Black Ops'.

April is the cruelest month, breeding
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing
Memory and desire, stirring
Dull roots with spring rain.
Winter kept us warm, covering
Earth in forgetful snow, feeding
A little life with dried tubers.
Summer surprised us, coming over the Starnbergersee
With a shower of rain; we stopped in the colonnade,
And went on in sunlight, into the Hofgarten,
And drank coffee, and talked for an hour.
Bin gar keine Russin, stamm’ aus Litauen, echt deutsch.
And when we were children, staying at the archduke’s,
My cousin’s, he took me out on a sled,
And I was frightened. He said, Marie,
Marie, hold on tight. And down we went.
In the mountains, there you feel free.
I read, much of the night, and go south in the winter.

(etc.)

(See what I did there :O )

[Tuan Jim !Y6d4OyAkDM No.2187190]

>>2187176
>>2187176
>currupt
Enjoy not being able to spell.

[Anonymous No.2187197]

Diablo by Soren Kierkegaard
>sounds awesome

[Anonymous No.2187202]

>Wittgenstein on Pokemon Red
Yes, please

[Dr. Seussicide (SLAF) No.2187204]

Samuel Beckett's Fifa 12
I guess it has Goalkeepers and stirkers and strikers as defenders? I don't know, that's the fun with beckett, no one really knows.

[Anonymous No.2187207]

>>2187098
Person to whom you were replying here.

Yep. I'd read that whole fucking book.

[Anonymous No.2187213]

Yasunari Kawabata's Red Dead Redemption

I'm not even going to try to write something, but I'd read the shit out of that book.

[Anonymous No.2187220]

China Mieville's "Super Mario Galaxy 2."

Am I the only one who'd red this?

[Anonymous No.2187248]

Valentin Tomberg's Orcs Must Die

I'd read it.

[Anonymous No.2187260]

Terry Pratchett's Fallout 3

Hmm. Can't do. not sure if want.

[Anonymous No.2187270]

>>2187008
yOU ALL HAVe shit TAstE INbooKS and GAMes.

[Deist !!gQNpRtZ1uG0 No.2187286]

>>2187270
No I don't jerk off you watch you're fucking mouth bitch.

[The Importance of Being On Time and Being No.2187288]

>>2187270
OU ALL HAV TAE INKS GAM
What do you guys think it means?
has /lit/ found its way onto another spooky mystery?

[Dr. Seussicide (SLAF) No.2187302]

>>2187288
It's an anagram for A Leviathan Oaks Glum the name of my new chapbook. You guys should buy it.

[Anonymous No.2187407]

Yoshi's Story by Rimbaud

lolollololololollololololol

[Anonymous No.2187418]

>>2187288
this post almost redeems this thread. almost

[Anonymous No.2187416]

>Grand Theft Auto 3 by Fyodor Dostoyevsky

ALL OF MY MONEY

[Anonymous No.2187433]

Arthur Miller: Oblivion

[Anonymous No.2187437]

>> Kurt Vonnegut's GTA IV

[Anonymous No.2187445]

Jose Luis Borges' "Morrowind".

It's pretty much the same thing, but with better prose.

[Anonymous No.2187451]

Fable by Jorges Luis Borges

That. Would actually be awsome.

[Anonymous No.2187465]

Jose Saramago's Ico. I might actually enjoying reading that.

[Anonymous No.2187469]

Paul Auster's The Binding of Isaac.
Honestly, the intro to the game is close enough to his style.

[Anonymous No.2187470]

Derrida's Quest for Glory.
The 4th wall gets broken even further, half way through the game the characters stop communicating through text dialogue and begin emoting and pantomiming. Character stats still exist, but whenever they are called up by the game engine, it deffers the calculations until later. Half way through you are no longer supposed to be guiding the protagonist, but instead you are supposed to kill him. There is no indication of this shift and you must realize it yourself.

[Walker No.2187521]

Arkham City as written by Jim Butcher.

[Anonymous No.2187659]

>>2187521
Sweet Jesus.

[Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ No.2187697]

Homer's Animal Crossing

....

[Anonymous No.2187858]

DC Universe Online by Dan Abnett

I wouldn't know where to begin lol. it would be long as fuck though.

[The Importance of Being On Time and Being No.2187865]

>>2187465

It seems like this would work really well, actually.

[Anonymous No.2187872]

Katamari Damacy by Kurt Vonnegut.

It...it makes sense.

[Anonymous No.2187902]

Dead Rising by Bret Easton Ellis.


Eh, pretty much the same thing.

[Anonymous No.2187918]

>David Foster Wallace's 'Dark Souls'

No way... Not even attempting that shit.

[Anonymous No.2188123]

Dostoyevsky's "Super Ghouls'n Ghosts"

I want this to make sense

[Anonymous No.2188158]

Benjamin Franklin writes Mario Party (#1 on the 64).

"I did not think it was with Propriety that Yoshi Rolled a Seven. It did not Serve Him well. I Myself Rolled a 10, and it did in fact, serve Me Greater than it did the Aforementioned Fellow. For while the Dreadful Reptile was Collecting Coins, I had been Soliciting the General Assembly to Allocate Stars for my own Contrivance of Victory. My Method was not properly Apprehended by my Opponent, and he came to ill will because of it."

[Anonymous No.2188161]

"Minesweeper" by Camus
I don't even know how to begin to attempt this.

[Anonymous No.2188162]

Before I write up my own I just want to say what huge cop-out faggots the posers who don't have an excerpt are.

/lit/ doesn't have writers. It has write-offs.

[Anonymous No.2188166]

>>2188158
HA

10/10

[Anonymous No.2188172]

Lovecraft writes Mario 64

The mottled skin and gaping mouth that I observed, as it flourishing limply down in the watery abyss, both excited and disturbed me. The eel-like creature had retained all the matter-of-fact muteness of the Old Ones, and its features hearkened wildly to the golden star affixed to the base of its tail. The being was just as my uncle had described in that careful note I'd found dating to February 28th 1919, and I could also reconcile the appearance of the creature with dim segments of descriptions I had read of in the Necronomicon.
A brisk dread came over me as I realized the precipitous ledge from which I would have to jump, only to land in the freezing stings of the water. The grim necessity of coaxing the creature from its hallowed and slime-coated lair had chilled me thoroughly before I had even hit the aching water below.

[Anonymous No.2188177]

"I only got to hold a Ratata once," said Misty Star in Gmail chat. "It was when I was at the gym and it was cute."

"That's cute," said Ash Ketchum. "I saw a Ratata eat 14 Oddishes and it was so awesome I wanted to catch him in a Great Ball but he ran away."

Misty Star looked at the computer weird.

"Okay," said Misty Star.

"I want to be there with you," said Misty Star.

"My Mom and Mr. Mime are here," said Ash Ketchum. Ash Ketchum said that his mom didn't approve of going to gyms and he told Misty that his mom didn't like that she had a gym.

"But I have a gym," said Misty Star.

After a long while, Ash Ketchum said, "I'm hungry. We should go to the health food store and buy nori."

"We should," said Misty Star. Misty Star made a noise at her computer.

[Anonymous No.2188182]

>Hunter S Thompson's, Team Fortress 2.


"The re-supply cabinet of the spawn looked like a mobile police narcotics lab. We had two ubers, seventy-five kritz, five jars of high-powered Jarate, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers . . . and also a quart of Bonk!, a quart of crit-a-cola, a case of Dolokovs, a pint of raw ether and two dozen Sandviches . . . Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked into a serious hat collection, the tendency is to push it as far as you can. The only thing that really worried me was the Sandvichs. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a man in the depths of an Sandvich binge. And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon."

[D/Generation !PsWaArQzRE No.2188183]

>Thomas Tessier
>Sonic Generations

Pic related.

[Anonymous No.2188185]

>>2188182
Hahaha.

[Anonymous No.2188187]

>>2188182

[Anonymous No.2188190]

>>2188182
We were somewhere around Dustbowl on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like "I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive...." And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge Scouts, all swooping and screeching and double-jumping around the cart, which was going about a hundred miles an hour to the point. And a voice was screaming "Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?"

Then it was quiet again. My Medic had taken his shirt off and was pouring Jarate on his chest, to facilitate the tanning process. "What zee hell are you yelling about?" he muttered, staring up at the sun with his eyes closed and covered with wraparound Genuine Deus Ex Specs. "Never mind," I said. "It's your turn to push." I hit the brakes and aimed the Cart toward the shoulder of the map. No point mentioning those Scouts, I thought. The poor bastard will see them soon enough.

[Anonymous No.2188208]

David Foster Wallace's Portal 2: (I don't play a lot of video games)

...and so the putative Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System, at this point a collection of barely-functioning wires and electrical components surrounded by a swarm of junior technicians, comes for the first time under scrutiny by C. Johnson and fiduciary assistant Caroline - C. J. having been taken ill for a period on some top-secret project that he would only mention had to do with the moon, such a clear diversion from whatever he was actually doing that the technicians had pretty much immediately given up trying to collect any truth on the matter. Douglas Rattman, not sure this is even his job really, has been tasked with answering the standard questions, e.g. why exactly the project is taking so long, why can't we just employ some more homeless people to do the gruntwork, and why precisely so many of the junior technicians keep dying of neurotoxin inhalation[254] - though he hardly seems particularly curious regarding the last part, the leptosomatic C.J. does, and spends more time abusing and just generally insulting whoever happens to cross his slow and ambling path. Caroline stays silent for the most part, except for "Yes, Mr. Johnson" and "No, Mr. Johnson" and "Maybe, Mr. Johnson", to the extent that Rattman begins to theorise that those three things make up her like entire vocabulary. Really the whole project gives Rattman the fantods and he'd much rather not be there at all, if there were any other facilities that would employ a technician regularly caught in conversation with inanimate objects.

[Anonymous No.2188209]

>>2188208
254. Bromide Dihydrochoroxide, supplied by Black Mesa Reserach Facility under great reluctance by C.J, who insisted that the efficacy of each batch be "thoroughly confirmed" to ensure Black Mesa didn't "give us any lemons"[a], in a procedure never quite elaborated on towards any other member of the facility but one whose introduction seemed to coincide with a sudden shortage of test subjects avaliable for regular experimentation.
a. No clue.

[Anonymous No.2188253]

>>2188208

[Anonymous No.2188260]

Cormac McCarthy's Dark Souls

Are we going to die here said the girl.
No said the man. He held his hands out towards the bonfire.
How long have we been here said the girl.
Ten days thought the man. A week he said to the girl.
A week. Okay.

They stayed at the bonfire overnight and kindled it for anyone else in the area.

Big walk ahead?
Big walk ahead.
Will it be dangerous?
Yes.
Will I die?
No.

The man got up and hefted his axe over his shoulder. The further down they headed the darker it got and the days were shorter. They came across a series of rickety wooden platforms and felt hollow eyes gazing down on them.

Is this a town?
Yes.
Where are the people?
There used to be people but they had to run away. Now there are only dead people.

They felt hollow eyes looking down on them.

[Anonymous No.2188262]

>Modern Warfare 3 by George Orwell
>Up ahead Mactavish and Price could see a hastily-made propaganda poster. On it was the face of their last enemy - the smiling devil Makarov. His face was cold and angular and somehow frozen as if his madness had been photographed once, from metres away, on a black night. In it he could see insanity and laughter.

"Not long now. One way or another, we'll all be able to rest soon." Price said.

[3rd No.2188265]

Fittingly enough: John Barth's Dungeons of Dredmor

>[...]the dungeon itself a series of interconnected hallways and chambers, uniform only in its differing floors' adherence to wildly divergent architectural styles (a bit of art deco here, crypt gothic there). I found myself considering, from a therapeutic stance, the possibility that while it would be meaningless to confront Dredmor it would certainly be just as meaningless not to confront him. Well.
>It additionally occurs to me that I've failed entirely, my reader, to introduce Dredmor himself into my narrative, or to commit any kind of satisfactory explanation of his presence. This recurring cur was a bit of a problem to the local natives: a lich-like being of no small means. [...] Lacking any kind of real solution to the blackguard in kind I was sent down, down below to deal with what other people, I believe, simply cannot deal with. All of it really brought to mind- especially traipsing through these wildly different scenes- the stories of the Arabian Nights, whose tales themselves were possessed of a peculiar[...]

[Anonymous No.2188268]

Lovecraft's Dark Souls

O Eldritch horror! Oh, such damnable monstrosity! To even describe such a thing would mean certain insanity and a tortuous death. If I were to describe it to you, we would surely all go mad, so I daren't describe what arcane abomination I did witness that night in Blight Town. I would never describe it! Never! I would never bring such description down upon the ears and hearts and minds of men! To describe the thing would be so utterly evil that I will never in a million years describe it!

It was a woman whose lower body had been replaced with a spider of most terrible description. A myriad of eyes dotted haphazardly about its head. Eight legs, each one covered in wickedly sharp barbs. All manner of warning-colors and spines and from its mouth spewed a fountain of molten magma, coughed up from some furnace deep within its crusty bowels. And the woman, a fierce beauty, make no mistake. Raven-haired, as naked as the day she was born, luring men in as mermaids upon a rock with sinful lust. She has thirteen wrinkles between the knuckles of her left pinky. 37 eyelash hairs. Oh, twas horrible.

[Anonymous No.2188278]

>>2188262
You sound fifteen.

[Anonymous No.2188471]

>Homer's Gears of War 3