[ 3 / biz / cgl / ck / diy / fa / ic / jp / lit / sci / vr / vt ] [ index / top / reports ] [ become a patron ] [ status ]
2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/lit/ - Literature

View post   
File: 404 KB, 966x902, 1320565280081.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
[ERROR] No.2181637 [Reply] [Original]

So you are rubbing your penis thinking of Ayn Rand when a djinn comes out of your balls. He says you have been blessed by the God of Literature and you may choose one of the following:

A. You may revive one writer/philosopher of your choice and chat with him or having write an extra book (if you revived a writer) before he dies for good.

B. Pick any language. You may now read anything in this language as if it were your mother tongue.

C. You now read 6 times as fast.

D. You have enough inspiration to write that ONE book you've always wanted to write. Your writing style is permanently improved too.

E. $5 000 000 in a special bank account, but you may only spend this in books/literature related items.

F. You may have sex with any book character of your choice.

However everything comes with a price, and the djinn tells you that you must sacrifice a /lit/ tripfag's life if you want to be granted one of these wishes. You may decide how painful the tripfag's death is, however: the longer, the more painful.

So, what do you choose and what tripfag do you kill?

>> No.2181647

B. Pick any language. You may now read anything in this language as if it were your mother tongue.

Russian.

I'd kill this mother fucker 'anonymous' i see him everywhere

>> No.2181661

>D. You have enough inspiration to write that ONE book you've always wanted to write. Your writing style is permanently improved too.
How much improvement are we talking? If I'm writing like Nabokov after this, this is really the only option. If it's just a bit of touch-up, however, I'll take C.

>> No.2181662

Deep&Edgy is the new Anonymous.

>> No.2181666

E

I WOULD THEN FIND ALL CLASSICS THAT AREN'T FOR FREE BUT ARE AVAILABLE AS EBOOKS AND THEN DISTRIBUTE THEM ONLINE FOR FREE

THEN I'D HIRE SOME MONKEYS TO BUY CLASSICS THAT AREN'T IN EBOOK FORM AT ALL, TO SCAN THEM, CONVERT THEM INTO NICE TEXT FILES, AND DISTRIBUTE THEM.

>> No.2181670

this picture was stolen from /sci/

fuck off /lit/fags

>> No.2181672

>>2181661

I almost chose D, but i'd feel like I was cheating if i just randomly was able to write an inspired novel. I'd probably not be able to write after my style was magically improved. I'd feel like a cheating fuck

>> No.2181675
File: 8 KB, 340x340, Faith No More - 1985 - We Care A Lot.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
[ERROR]

>>2181670

>> No.2181680

didnt we have this thread already?
And didnt we all agree that D&E needed to die?

>> No.2181681

>>2181680
I believe the earlier version of this thread was what led to the legion of D&Es.

>> No.2181684

>>2181681
I think I was actually the one who brought up subjectivity for the first time (before taking off)

so sorry about that yall.

>> No.2181693

WHAT THE FUCK, I JUST GOT TWO 666 POSTS IN LESS THAN A DAY IN /LIT/

WHAT THE FUCK

>> No.2181828

C, Brownbear

>> No.2181829

>>2181637
Read 6 times as fast. Assuming my brain will still process what I read in the same fashion.

>> No.2181832

D
The one book I've always wanted to write is the one that puts me in caviar for life.

>> No.2181835

E

Spend it all on the rarest/signed editions of classics and then burn them.

>> No.2181837

Whoever doesnt save A to use it when George RR Martin dies before writing the 7th book is a retarded person.

>> No.2181897

F.

>aslan

>> No.2181904

>>2181897
AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT READ THAT AS 'ASIAN' AND THOUGHT "WTF"

>> No.2181931

C.

I've only just come back to /lit/ after a long break, so I have no idea who is still shitting up this board. Deep&Edgy, Brownbear, and that other moron who made long posts about smoking weed and how bad it is will always have a place in my heart. May their demise be long and painful.

>> No.2181936

D
and i'd kill D&E because he's a pedantic adherent to form.

>> No.2181939

>>2181904
is fucking aslan less wtf worthy than asian? on /lit/ maybe.

>> No.2181945

>>2181936
>pedantic adherent to form.
that's a weird way to say "likes to talk about what makes literature great"

go talk about whether character a,b or x is going to die in the next GRRM turd

>> No.2183013

>>2181945
>derp

>> No.2183033

>>2181945
>GRRM turd

you have no way of knowing if that is true. it's just like, you're opinion man....

>> No.2183045

>not picking Fabulous

>> No.2183071

>>2183045

He's too cute to kill.

>> No.2183081

>>2183045
>not picking D&E

>> No.2183105
File: 1.27 MB, 2911x2509, 0007stfc.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
[ERROR]

>>2181945

Dude you are obsessed with GRRM.

Did he steal your girlfriend or something?

>> No.2183110

>>2183105
I read his books and even enjoyed them.But that doesn't change the fact that they're worth shit in terms of literary value

>> No.2183113

>>2181945

>go talk about whether character a,b or x is going to die in the next GRRM turd

It's weird how you occupy almost every ASoIaF thread but still seem to have no grasp on what people talk about in them.

>> No.2183114

>>2183110
AND WITH THIS BEING A BOARD DEDICATED TO LITERATURE, THAT'S QUITE IMPORTANT.

>> No.2183122

If I kill six tripfags, can I have all six wishes? If not, can the djinn still kill six tripfags for me?

Nonetheless, D. And I'd make it a fucking doorstop of a novel, too. Get my money's worth from that wish.

>> No.2183146

>>2183110

>I read his books

Wait, for real? What about that Schopenhauer picture and quote you love so much? Poison to the mind and such?

>> No.2183148

B. For the sole reason that it's the only one useful outside of reading.

I choose that the caps guy dies peacefully in bed at an age which he finds appropriate.

>> No.2183153

>>2183110
holy shit, i like this guy

also, I'd choose C all the way. Why would any reader not want to read more?

>> No.2183157

>>2183146
Actually GRRM's series is 'junk literature', bad for your mind but it feels good and it doesn't harm to have some from time to time. It's not even worth 'poisoning' literature. But watching all those autistic neckbeards rage over my picture is priceless.

>> No.2183163

>>2183157
Suit yourself, I don't have the time to waste my life on meaningless pursuits.

>> No.2183216
File: 221 KB, 1052x979, 1318735649009.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
[ERROR]

F.
only fools choose otherwise