Books to become a better Father/ Husband?

[Anonymous No.21763995]

I feel like a neurotic mess. I spend all day on a computer, underground, in the dark. The people that I talk to are fucked up, 70% of the time. I get exercise and eat healthy but because of how cold it still is (-20 degrees the last week) I barely go outside except to commute.

Any recommendations such that I can become a better person for the people in my life who need me? More and more often I find myself breaking down and just spewing verbal diarhea on my woman but it seems to pain her to console me. I can't do this anymore.

[Anonymous No.21764087]

>>21763995
I’m a Chad father. Listen to me you faggot. Stop gaming and start actually reading and getting exercise. Your children need you to guide them out of the womb of the home and into the absolute hell that is our world right now. If you don’t raise them then the faggot religion will. You need a psychological and spiritual guide. I recommend Jesus. Follow his example as much as possible. You need to put nutrients in your soul or you will continue to wilt and your children will be fucked for it. Read

Hold Onto your kids first to get a general idea about how attachment bonds work so you understand how critical it is to keep those bonds strong. You need to prioritize education over everything else. Read about what goi g in in the world so you can gain the dialogue necessary to navigate he complex system of faggotry. start with Murray’s ‘War on the West’ for a general overview. Stop sitting on your computer and realize that you will adapt to the pain of addiction. You will feel anxious and aggravated for a while but this will pass. Give yourself to the higher source (Supreme Personality of Godhead) and work every day in specific measurable ways to develop habits God will place in your mind through your own thoughts. You need to break down your current destructive thought structures/ habits and create new ones with a positive framework(Jesus). Above all, don’t be a fag. Just fucking do it. You can do it and you will do it.

[Anonymous No.21764142]

>>21764087
What should I talk to my wife about? If I am overly neurotic, where would it be wise to draw the line, such that I don't seem like sniveling pathetic wreck?

[Anonymous No.21764147]

>>21763995
I dunno. Something about feminism I guess, but I'm not well read enough on that subject.

[Anonymous No.21764194]

>>21763995
>>21764087
Listen do based Chaddad.
If his post is overwhelming you, a good first step is to just stop being a pussy. Fathers need to be strong. Be strong in mind, body, and soul. The rest will work itself out.

[Anonymous No.21764204]

>>21763995
Why do you unironically care about such gay shit.

[Anonymous No.21764541]

>>21763995
That for me is the most beautiful phenotype that exists. It's rather uncommon, but can be seen sometimes in girls of Mediterranean heritage.

[Anonymous No.21764689]

PRAISE BE TO THE MOST HIGH YOU FUCKING AMBULATORY PILLAR OF SALT NIGGERBOY PRAISE BE TO GOD FOLLOW JESUS CHRIST AND HE WILL FIX YOU UP!!!! (inhale) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[Anonymous No.21764976]

>>21763995
Read pic related (you can start nkw, odfs are easily found simply by google.) It should change your relationship to your kids, and by extrapolation your wife. Don't expose your kid to shit like TV, phones, internet, even overly complicated electronic toys (they make parenting choices for you, and not the ones you want.) Get your kids a shit ton of DK illustrated educational books on things like human anatomy, history, geography; if they can understand npc shit like a dog having a job and driving a rocket car in futuristic city they can understand and start making associations between things that will actually be useful---you'll probably enjoy them, too, as they contain short packets of colorful information.

Accept that nobody gives a shit about every little issue you have; before you unload your issues consider if you aren't simply burdening others by unburdeing yourself. If it's not worth weighing someone else down then keep it to yourself 8/10 times it'll pass without some confessional emotional meltdown and you'll start to learn and feel confident that your overreliance on others for emotional succor is unnecessary. You build strength of all sorts--emotional, physical, mental--through incremental gains. To this end read something like A Short Treatise on the Great Virtues.

[Anonymous No.21765051]

>>21763995
Keep talking to people, formulate social skills even if it's hard, it gets better and its fulfilling. Also, I'm not sure if your homphobic, racist, transphobic, anti-Semitic, or anything derogatory, if you're stop. Doesn't matter if someones a billionaire that donates all their money to charity and is making the world a better place, if someone is a derogatory jackass no one worth caring about will like them, if you know someone like that whose deragtory un-ironically, think about discarding them.

Also, don't ever listen to morons that make up bullshit to act uncivil and treat their fellow man with shit. Lastly, kill people with kindness when you can. When it doesn't make you seem like a massive pushover pussy, people appreciate a man that stays calm and doesn't escalate. People respect kind people, as long as you aren't taking advantage of, its always a plus to be a pleasant person to be around.

As for working out and eating well keep it up, it's always a good thing to do

[Anonymous No.21765065]

>>21765051
Oh, also, all that stuff is important since it brings awareness to interacting with your wife and kids. An outside perspective of how you interact and communicate is how to be the best father. Lack of social skills fathers that are mostly unpleasent is how so many people are fucked up nowadays

[Anonymous No.21765069]

>>21763995
I don't have books to recommend. I can only say that you should get a job, a hobby in which you work with your hands, and start going to church. Books won't fix your issues.

[Anonymous No.21765276]

>>21763995
What are you doing on the computer all day?

Try reading the Tao te Ching. Learn to stop being neurotic and let things happen. You need to learn to calm yourself down. The thing that helped me to be at least functional is recognize when you're sperging out and then take deep slow breaths. Sounds dumb but try it.

Find a new hobby, like reading books. Don't read or watch the news. Ban it completely from your life.

If you have the urge to whine to your wife, recognize the urge, breath, then stop. Write down what you want to say. Even if it's 1000 pages. After you're finished writing, delete it. You'll feel better, trust me.

If you can control yourself at all, you'll never get what you want. Accept the pain of trying, resist the joy of falling into your bad habit. Pain is love.

[Anonymous No.21765399]

>>21763995
If at all possible, stop your daughter from going to fight the english. That never ends well.

[Anonymous No.21765458]

>>21763995
>I can't do this anymore.
Either kys, or learn to critic yourself-- remember what you have said and your critic of it--, and evaluate your thoughts and opinions; and do not say or do what you hate about yourself ever again.

[Anonymous No.21765461]

>>21764087
Based

[Anonymous No.21765622]

>>21763995
21 year old zoomer here... I almost feel like this is the first time I've realised that fathers have feelings too. I just sort of assumed by the time you had a kid you would automatically have your life sorted out, and by becoming a father you automatically become less neurotic and self-absorbed and just sort of fill the role of father naturally. But by the looks of what other anons are saying, the awkward, existential self-consciousness that you first feel as a teenager doesn't away, just slightly more repressed?

[Anonymous No.21765740]

>>21763995
Just stop being a pussy man it’s that simple

[Anonymous No.21765802]

>>21763995
Get out of this place you absolute moron

[Anonymous No.21765803]

>>21765622
I come from a more trad society and even zoomers here are normal people. Has to do more with the age and place we live in I guess

[Anonymous No.21765808]

women don't love men

[Anonymous No.21766025]

>>21764087
>Chad
Don't listen to this guy. No one sane uses the term "Chad".

[Anonymous No.21766490]

>>21763995
I'd also advise what >>21765069 said. Also, watch Bluey.

[Anonymous No.21766739]

>>21765808
They do, they just can’t see you.
Are you sinking into stoicism yourself, or do you still get lovesick as a lonely romantic?

[Anonymous No.21767163]

>>21763995
There’s no books for that.

[Anonymous No.21767175]

>>21764087
You're not a father lmao you're a 16yo larper who probably jerked himself off writing this Bronze Age Mindset-tier entry-level platitude shit

[Anonymous No.21767907]

>>21767175
Dude I really am a father though I have a lot of kids actually.

[Anonymous No.21767909]

>>21763995
Go to church and do BJJ. Thank me later

[Anonymous No.21767913]

>>21767909
Blowjob job?

[Anonymous No.21767939]

>>21763995
>Books to become a better Father/ Husband?
Don't read.

[Anonymous No.21767988]

>>21763995
Enchiridion. Read and practice.

[Anonymous No.21768183]

>>21767175

Please enlighten us then. I'd love to hear your advice.

[Anonymous No.21768243]

I’m married with two small daughters. I work a computer job where I sit in my office alone and maybe talk to someone every other day. New state no friends. Parents don’t like me. No time to myself. Feel myself breaking down. My wife has her own problems I think she is starting to dislike. I don’t believe her when she says something nice to me. I keep telling myself “I have to do my duty. This my role. This is my destiny to be fulfilled and I need to do it the best I can”.

Read Always with Honor by Pyotr Wrangel

[Anonymous No.21768327]

>>21768243

Sorry to hear that.

Just became a father myself and it changes up a lot of things. I imagine it can be extremely taxing on the relationship to both myself and my girlfriend in the long run, but I try my best.

We're both artists, and I make a meager living off the written word for the time being. I do get anxious about the future sometimes. At the same time I try to focus on the fact that we have a beautiful and healthy daughter, just got a house and a fresh chapter in life.

Economically poor, but we have all there is to have kinda vibe.

Hope it gets better for you - I've made a conscious effort to stay out of soul crushing jobs like you describe. Do you have any alternatives in the future?

Also, believe your wife when she says positive things to you. No need to make that part sour as well. Those glimpses are worth keeping and developing in my estimation.

I have much to learn down the road, though.

[Anonymous No.21768368]

You might need therapy more than books, honestly. Maybe go to a spa and relax. Take out your verbal diarrhea on random internet people instead of your wife.

[Anonymous No.21768379]

>>21768327
I appreciate your words. Congratulations on becoming a father. I know it will get better. Sometimes it all feels so dark. I need to get better at managing my time at work, focus hard then go for a walk, read, or do something at my desk that isn’t a computer. The loneliness is the worst part. I worked 8 years in manufacturing where I was always talking to people. Now I’m doing real technical DoD stuff. My wife does mean what she’s says, she really is my biggest fan. Thanks Anon.

[Anonymous No.21768383]

>>21768327
Protip: get a gimmick. There's no book of leaves knockoff, so you could write that. Or you could dig into foreign culture and rarely explored topics.. there's nothing about the canary islands in English, for instance. A historical novel about Guanches would be cool.

[Anonymous No.21768456]

>>21768383

Thanks for the tip, although I'm not in literature anymore. I just write opinion pieces or articles about forgotten composers or other stuff I find interesting.

My own passions are mostly devoted to music nowadays. No external success in sight thus far, perhaps a concept album about the canary islands would seal the deal...

[Anonymous No.21768471]

>>21768379

Sounds like you know what you need to do, and yes it does get dark. I feel the loneliness too. Had to move away from all our friends because of the housing market and stuff.

Having some time to do my own projects alleviates the pain, but I do miss being social with my friends, being spontaneous and that kind of thing. We moved out to the country side, and while it's not too far from the city it still makes things much more tricky.

We just have to do our best and hang in there, I guess. Things change all the time, for better or worse.

Best of luck to you!

[Anonymous No.21768505]

>>21763995
The fact that you care is good enough in itself. I see mindfulness suggested a lot but I’m not sure if it’s legit or not. I wish you and your family the best

[Anonymous No.21768626]

I'm not a father, but I'll throw out C.S. Lewis as a good source for some manly wisdom. He manages to be patient and understanding without enabling bad behavior.

[Anonymous No.21768956]

>>21763995
Mein Kampf.

[Anonymous No.21769699]

>>21768956
It’s a shit book.

[Anonymous No.21769741]

>>21764087
Fpbp

[Anonymous No.21769987]

>>21764976
This, you need to lock your wife and kids in a secure compound and prevent them from communicating with the outside world. This is definitely good advice.

[Anonymous No.21770045]

>>21764142
Just be quiet. Don’t say anything about yourself. Instead, ask her about herself.

[Anonymous No.21770157]

>>21768183
Why? It’s not as though any of you in here will actually act on it

[Anonymous No.21770227]

>>21765622
Lmao that’s the idea. The hope. That by the time someone decides to have children they have their shit sorted out. But unfortunately we live in a world where that doesn’t happen and people just shit kids out all willy nilly because they think it’s their right. That’s why im totally against this current push telling everyone to have as many kids as they can and have them young. Fucking retards.

[Anonymous No.21770440]

>>21770157

Coward!

[Anonymous No.21770645]

>>21763995
Go to a therapist friend. Sometimes it's hard to put aside your pride, but you clearly have the motivation to make things better, and having a little help is always good. Rooting for you anon

[Anonymous No.21771633]

>>21764087
This post would've been based were it not for one thing.

[Anonymous No.21771637]

>>21768368
>>21770645
Shalom!

[Anonymous No.21771887]

>>21771633
Whether you like it or not Jesus is the ultimate goal. He has many names such as light and truth so even if you spend your entire life seeking truth you are actually seeking Him because he is truth manifested perfectly in personality.

[Anonymous No.21772300]

>>21771887
That's not what I meant.

[Anonymous No.21772315]

>>21772300
Ok