/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.21709145]

anyone feel like sometimes they’re wasting their time on the theoretical?

I have a BA in English Literature, an MA in Comp Lit, and a PhD in English Literature. I’m lecturing at a middling university in Europe and spend my time reading, researching, publishing papers and tutoring.

While I take a measure of quiet pride in my academic achievements, it’s difficult seeing some of my peers live lives of ‘action’. One of my friends who also did Eng Lit undergrad went into consulting, has just wrapped up an MBA at a top business school and is now earning $250k+. He has a huge house, nice car and a holiday villa in Italy. With his money and influence he’s able to sit on boards of charities and have more of a meaningful impact, and - to top it all off - he’s still managed to publish short stories in decent journals, and is working on his first novel.

I guess it’s a bit of a crisis mixed with jealousy. Not everyone is called to the same path. Aristotle tutored Alexander - did Alexander really achieve more? I guess I’m an Aristotle panicking that I should have been an Alexander. Can anyone relate?

[Anonymous No.21709164]

>>21709145
Midwit

[Anonymous No.21709169]

any time you spend worrying about it is wasted.

[Anonymous No.21709173]

Somewhat, but I think the hard truth is that you’re not even an Aristotle. I’m far from you even. I ended up in the university in a staff position, which is basically a dead-end career field that adds nothing to your biography. I’m now trying to figure out what direction I can move in that makes sense for what I want because knowing what I want, this experience seems like a waste. What would you do if you were to leave the university?

[Anonymous No.21709174]

>>21709145
Fight Club

[Anonymous No.21709184]

>>21709145
Can't relate. My only achievement is a BS in physics, a horse farm, and a job with the government doing electronic maintenance. I have never had the courage to go for anything I actually wanted, only ever looking to gain practical skills that will make me money. I produce nothing of value and am slipping into a psychosis that makes me care less and less each day if I continue to maintain this shallow life I lead. It will all come crashing down. Don't be like me. If you find something you want to do that is more practical do it, but don't do it just because you think it is more practical.

[Anonymous No.21709189]

>>21709184
You own a horse farm or you work at a horse farm?

[Anonymous No.21709190]

>>21709145
Why do people think they're able to consciously determine the course of their lives? I've never seen anything to indicate that this is true.

[Anonymous No.21709240]

>>21709189
I pay a mortgage on a horse farm. I board 2 horses and own 4 others.

[Anonymous No.21709362]

>>21709240
that is really cool
post some horse pics

[Anonymous No.21709395]

>>21709362
Got my mom on Oly When she came down the end of last summer. She is redacted because she's wanted by the feds for tax evasion. I would get some fresh pictures but its raining outside. maybe later Ill post some.

[Anonymous No.21709397]

>>21709184
>>21709173
>>21709164
I suppose then my question is which is the more fulfilling life? I have always loved books and thought pursuing them through career made sense, but i would give anything for a large property, to not have to worry about money, to have achieved something in the world outside of theory.

[Anonymous No.21709412]

>>21709362
I found another one of our girl River, who isn't afraid of anything, coming up to get some marshmallows while we were having a bonfire.

[Anonymous No.21709413]

>>21709395
Comfy

[Anonymous No.21709427]

>>21709397
I do not make that much money. The only way we afford this place is because both my and my wife work to much to enjoy it. It has its moments but it doesn't cancel out the hours doing something Ive come to hate and the other hours I spend remembering that I am in that cycle until I die. Like I said, every day seems less and less worth the effort. At least if I actually pursued something for myself I wouldn't feel like such a cowardly fool.

[Anonymous No.21709429]

>>21709397
I'm in a similar position to you, but I find my escape from theory in doing practical things like woodworking and beekeeping. go spend time in nature.

[Anonymous No.21709503]

>>21709240
So you basically own it, and as someone who was a hand for years my perception is that owning a horse farm/ranch is a nice and interesting life.

[Anonymous No.21709505]

>>21709397
I asked you what you would do if you left the university and you didn’t answer.

[Anonymous No.21709541]

>>21709503
It's easier to see it as renting it from the bank when you are actually making the monthly payments and thinking about just walking out on your job, but yes, to the standards of the modern housing market, I own it. Owning a farm is an interesting life if you have the time and energy to actually enjoy the farm. Chores are chores and there is a bit of a therapeutic aspect to taking care of the critters and maintain their habitat but its gotten to a point where it feels more like a jail cell than something that is mine because it locks me into a life style that makes me even more afraid to pursue something new. Maybe you would fair better in my position but I can only speak to my own experience.

[Anonymous No.21709590]

>>21709395
>She is redacted because she's wanted by the feds for tax evasion.
based

[Anonymous No.21709626]

>>21709541
If you wanted to sell it, you probably could and that money could fund this something new. You’re better off than you think you are. Is the property big enough to do something like a dude ranch experience?

[Anonymous No.21709640]

>>21709145
Both Nietzsche and Stirner were mere teachers.

[Anonymous No.21709654]

I would leave the university if I were you. I can only speak about my personal experience but working in a university has become a big regret of mine and I’m convinced the longer I stay, the worse off I’ll be.

[Anonymous No.21709677]

>>21709640
They were professors, which is a degree higher than teacher, and writing is a natural progressing from teaching. It’s not a life of action though.

[Anonymous No.21709773]

>>21709145
Eh, I sometimes get the feeling. I also chose academia. It'd be nice to be rich, and I'd love a villa in Italy, but honestly, I'll just rent an airbnb for three weeks every year and save myself the headache of upkeep and maintenance and taxes.
I know several career-typed people who are also doing board work now, and I would not trade. It's just meetings but with people in more expensive suits, and these people well and truly live and breathe for work, and have been since they were teenagers. I could quite simply not pursue their lifestyle - I would hang myself within three years.

[Anonymous No.21709847]

>>21709773
What do you think makes a person like that?

[Anonymous No.21709870]

>>21709145
The truly ‘successful’ people are indeed those CEOs, partners in big firms, top litigators, and the like.

You have intelligence. That is all very well. You know a lot of things. Accumulation of knowledge does not equal success. Any janitor can pick up a book and give himself an education.

Top executives possess by definition at least above-average intelligence, but also a whole host of qualities which professors and scientists on poverty lack - emotional intelligence, the ability to network, to identify opportunities and doggedly pursue them, when to yield and when to be ruthless, the ability to accumulate wealth and multiply it, to accumulate power and influence - in short, they know how to play the game called life, and, given their rare combination of intelligence, talent, drive, and competition, that tiny percentage of remarkable people make it to the top of their respective spheres.

I don’t know what you want me to say. You play your part. Yours is better than most. You could equate it to a court magician. But you are not the King, and if you were capable of being so I believe you would be.

It is my belief that people generally end up inhabiting the stations in life worthy of them.

[Anonymous No.21709879]

I think it depends on what you do. I'm a high school English teacher. I love what I do with shitty pay. I'm going back to get a lit masters so I can teach the dual enrollment college level courses at my school. I have goals within the framework of my field, and that's how I feel a sense of advancement and purpose in my job. Try thinking outside your own box. Maybe start a substack and start writing. Who knows - you may publish a book one day
John Guillory just came out with a new book on this called professing criticism: essays on the organization of literary study. It addresses this topic of hyper specialization and feeling useless in the critical world.

[Anonymous No.21709904]

>>21709626
I think that if I explained the whole of my situation to anyone on here they would think I was crazy for saying what I said. Got the 15 acre farm with 13 acres of posture (not quite big enough for a dude ranch but probably could do some kind of air bnb experience with the in law sweet behind the main house), a tech job where people think Im the smartest mother fucker alive because I can fix broken circuit boards without a schematic, a wife who is more than happy with what I bring to the table (the horses are really hers btw, I just bought and admire them) and all that. The point is that the attitude I have because I took the rout OP is asking about makes me enjoy none of that. Which really is the worse part. Knowing that the world you built around you is full of wonder but you can't see it because of the methods you used to build it. Any way Im going to stop complaining. I have ways out if things get to be too much that include simply walking away from it and starting again. I just wanted to give OP that context to think about.

[Anonymous No.21710057]

>anons with objectively good lives still manage to bitch about them
Would you be truly happy in any situation?

[Anonymous No.21710067]

>>21709904
I used to work at a 5 acre horse farm and we guided rides through the local state forests. People bought lodgings on the property and then we’d load the horses up into a trailer, load the people into the truck, drive to the trail head and take the trails. Something like that would provide some income and something for you to do if you could make that work. I don’t really consider owning a horse form to categorically belong to the same thing OP is talking about and if you don’t like tech job, just get a new job. You’re clearly smart enough to do other things.

[Anonymous No.21710075]

>>21709879
Teaching is like a standard job that a lot of people do at various points in their lives. Presidents have been teachers. Army officers have been teachers. Musicians and movie stars have been teachers. I’m a staff employee in education, and I think that’s a far worse place to be than faculty.

[Anonymous No.21710080]

>>21710057
I have a bachelor's in computer engineering and I'm fucking rich and I have never been more miserable. I think about killing myself everyday. Not idle fantasies. It's like a never ending day dream of planning my suicide. I've written many notes. I know I'll do it. I am so fucking miserable. Anyone in 4chan who thinks money is the way is a retard. If you think being a neet is happiness you're a retard. I want to fucking die. So bad. It's unbelievable.

[Anonymous No.21710082]

>>21709145
>reddit spacing

[Anonymous No.21710132]

>>21710080
Money doesn't really buy happiness but if you're rich and miserable you have to be doing something wrong. All that money and you can't put it to good use?

[Anonymous No.21710139]

>>21709847
Maybe they were always like that, maybe they dedicated themselves to it at some point in their teenage years tenaciously enough, and then in those formative years, habit became character, and that became their life. Some of them were surely paced by parents. I can't say for certain. What I do know is that most of them seem to enjoy it, and to each his own, but I know myself well enough to see that I would not.

[Anonymous No.21710158]

>>21710080
Is it like "fuck you money" double-digit millions, or is it just six-figure hell? Like what? If you're that rich, why don't you travel the world instead, and see if it makes you less miserable? If you find it doesn't, you can kys in Japan or whatever, seems to be pretty in there.

[Anonymous No.21710190]

>>21710057
>Noooo you can't be dissatisfied with a life that my impeccable taste and wealth of life experience deems good!

[Anonymous No.21710195]

>>21709145
I am currently doing a BA in English Lit and I don't know why. It just happened by circumstance, I was orginally going to do Law. I had my whole life planned out and now I'm just freefalling but I can't afford to flounder and stall my life any longer. I'm just gonna do the degree and see where it takes me. I already have enough regrets that another one won't change anything—I just want to keep moving

[Anonymous No.21710220]

>>21710190
You can be dissatisfied but really it just makes you look like a bitch. People are on here talking about owning a horse farm like it's a soul-crushing burden. Like if you stopped romanticizing your misery for even a second you would realize how fucking stupid that is

[Anonymous No.21710230]

>>21710220
>>21710190
>>21710057
The question isn’t so much satisfaction as a life of ideas (teaching/academia/literature) vs a life of action (business/wealth/power) in the modern world, and which is objectively more fruitful

[Anonymous No.21710232]

>>21710067
The tech job bit is more what I was talking about with OP since its what I chose to do because it was the practical money making thing (and is also the thing that bathes my days in shades of gray). That is an interesting idea. I don't have national forest too close to me but I do have some trails that run along the river that are public. There is also a horse community not too far that has public trails. My only issue is that I have a problem with expanding horse boarding facilities on my property because I live in a heavy hurricane area and the bulk of my pasture is in a flood plane (The house actually flooded in hurricane florence. That fact plus the original owners getting a divorce while doing renovations is why we could afford it in the first place). That is something to think about though. My wife has expressed wanting to work part time on a trail riding set up, maybe she would be into it (she is the more experienced rider). Thanks anon.

[Anonymous No.21710243]

>>21710230
Yes, and my original point is that picking the life that will make you more money/ get you more "power" solely for that purpose can lead to dissatisfaction. Even though it looks more appealing from the other side. Im not sure how that is so unclear.

[Anonymous No.21710247]

>>21710220
You evaluating that owning a horse farm is an objective good speaks volumes to your lack of experience with such things and your lack of understanding that different people find satisfaction in different things. Not to mention that you are completely missing the point that there is an external that makes that thing less enjoyable. You really should be over 18 to post here anon.

[Anonymous No.21710252]

>>21709145
>I guess I’m an Aristotle panicking that I should have been an Alexander.
Caesar was saddened by the age at which Alexander achieved his glory after seeing a statue of him in Spain. Aristotle didn't care. There was even speculation that he helped poison Alexander in revenge for the death of his nephew Callisthenes (Alexander's court historian). I dont even think he spent his last years at the Macedonian court at Pella. If you would rather claim yourself a Caesar then that is just ridiculous - you are not, and the comparison is laughable.

[Anonymous No.21710259]

>>21710247
Not that anon, but honestly, come on man, it is always superior to own a horse farm than not owning one, because even if you hate it you can just sell it and voila, riches for cocaine and hookers.

[Anonymous No.21710262]

>>21710247
Owning a horse farm indicates a level of financial stability that most people don't have, and if you can't appreciate that then I doubt you would find satisfaction in much of anything

[Anonymous No.21710264]

>>21709145
I would die for your job lad. I want to lecture either in Classics or English and would do anything to dedicate my life to literature, philosophy and languages.

[Anonymous No.21710269]

>>21709145
Don’t care. Didn’t finish and you’re gay.

[Anonymous No.21710333]

>>21710264
Academia has more than its fair share of bullshit as well anon, not least of which is the extreme precariousness of your life. A few of the very talented and very lucky (luck is more important than talent) hit the jackpot early in their careers and get a stable/tenured position early in life, but for the vast majority, a stable income in the same place is something you'll realistically only attain in your 40's. Until that, it is a nomad-life where you constantly move to where the next 6-36 month position is.

[Anonymous No.21710425]

>>21710259
>>21710262
You can tell that to all the "financially stable" farmers that get there houses taken from them when the banks foreclose. I do not have enough savings to pay my mortgage for 2 months if I lose my job. Every time I get something put away a tractor breaks, an animal has some vet bullshit, some part of the pluming that gets water to places on the farm where I need it breaks, a car breaks down or some other bullshit. There is a lot of pressure to keep that up because of the responsibility of multiple animal lives hang on the stability of the farm. On top of that there is the constant threat of a hurricane flooding my shit, rising costs in everything, and my steadily declining mental health. Maybe I would never be satisfied with any life. I doubt it because there are so many different life styles but maybe. But to talk like one way is objectively better just because you got some fucking money coming in is nuts. I could be in a completely different position doing something I like, making 2/3 what I do, live in a 2 bedroom cottage on a 2 acre lot and have less stress and not have this dark cloud of knowing that I get to do some menial bullshit I hate for the rest of my life.

[Anonymous No.21710449]

>>21710425
No matter how you frame it you still sound like a huge bitch

[Anonymous No.21710460]

>>21710333
It's a bit easier in Europe in fairness, tenure works very differently here. Going from my results there's a good chance I'll get into a PHD at Cambridge/Oxford in a few years, something like Anglo-Saxon studies at cambridge is very niche and I can read Old English for example.

[Anonymous No.21710523]

The university system is a prison designed to keep intelligent people busy with things that don't matter. Just imagine deconstructing Ulysses as a billionaire enjoys the fat of the land and works to secure the demi-god existence of his friends and family for generations to come. You're basically a eunuch.

You're living a very disgraceful existence. They gave you an identity of being an Aristotle to make you feel like you have a hand in power, but you don't. Those caps and gowns, rituals galore—all sublimations of your hysterical inferiority complex. What you are feeling now is contact with the truth.

It's really sad, and I wish I could save you, but there's no way you can come to terms with the truth without enduring the full weight of the humiliation you've already suffered. If you knew you were getting pissed on the whole time, you could have developed a resistance, but now you're sipping on piss, storing it as your treasure, and girlishly spouting piss fountains from your mouth...how can one reach someone so inundated with piss.

It's hard to tell someone that they are covered in piss when they think they are covered with gold.

[Anonymous No.21710580]

>>21709145
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRm4_6an9is

>>21709145
>did Alexander really achieve more
Repent, peripatetic!

>>21710523
>The university system is a prison designed to keep intelligent people busy with things that don't matter.
Bingo
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/-PVzmxJU_r8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6U1uIlvGSRQ

[Anonymous No.21710616]

>>21710449
Ok. So on top of being an ineffectual coward Im also a bitch. I suppose that stands to reason. Argument retracted. OP you should sell your body like a whore in order to get what you want in your free time. Gentlemen, Im off to be a cowardly, ineffectual bitch somewhere else. sorry for wasting your time.

[Anonymous No.21710651]

If anything its a cool field to be in. Pop culture right now is kinda rehashing the same stuff.

[Anonymous No.21710663]

>>21709145
Money envy is low IQ

[Anonymous No.21710665]

>>21709190
isn't that just the path of an academic?