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/lit/ - Literature


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21696074 No.21696074 [Reply] [Original]

/wwoym/ Petey Wheatstraw edition, bitches.

Previous thread >>21684085

>> No.21696083 [DELETED] 

>>21696074
Reading is for women and homosexuals, unless you’re reading for work.

>> No.21696084

>>21696074
This board would be 100% better if new threads had a minimum word count requirement to post.

>> No.21696088

>>21696074
Got a couple teeth pulled today while awake because I can’t go under anesthesia if I’m not in a hospital. Nothing like the surgeon struggling to pry out you tooth with a lot of force telling you “lots of pressure, big cracking sound”. Now if only my extraction sites would stop bleeding it’d be great

>> No.21696092
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21696092

Should I fuck my BPD daddy issues slut coworker or nah?

>> No.21696096

>>21696074
i tried explainging white noise and don dellilo and ohio anbd the airborne toxic Ereignis to my coworkers again over drinks. They must think im insane or

>> No.21696097

REMEMBER, DO NOT REPLY TO THE TRIPFAG

>> No.21696098

>>21696088
I hope you got pain pills.

>> No.21696102

>>21696098
Nah. Opiates like heroin fucked my life up for years. I wouldn’t take them

>> No.21696103

>>21696097
we need more trips here.

>> No.21696113

>>21696102
I meant paracetamol, not skag.

>> No.21696115

>>21696113
Yeah of course. Maybe it’s just my area but pain pills generally mean narcotics

>> No.21696200

Narcissists will finally see someone superior to them in future AI's. AI is in the long-term the ultimate solution to people who doubt the manifestation of certain abilities outside of something, be it themselves, groups, ethnic groups, etc.

>> No.21696220
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21696220

I want to rule a galactic empire, any books to help with this?

>> No.21696230

i'm tired of all the propaganda on 4chan. it's exhausting to see a thread and think "is this bullshit manufactured to confuse me?" very annoying. there's no way the obsession with trannies, for example, is organic. i don't necessarily believe there are a bunch of 3rd worlders being paid to shit up boards with propaganda, but something is definitely fishy.
it's not just the more obvious stuff i'm talking about, like trannies or whatever. i'm also talking about stuff like the athiest threads on /his/ that you see so frequently. are they propaganda? it's not clear, but very possible. there's no way to really know. that uncertainty and doubt as to whether you're reading questions posed in good-faith or malicious attempts to sow seeds of doubt is very obnoxious.

>> No.21696244

>>21696230
There’s definitely pushes every now and then to radicalize others. I’ve seen poltards admit they do it here

>> No.21696306
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21696306

>> No.21696338
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21696338

When reading a book series, do you read them back-to-back or do you read other things in between? I'm thinking of continuing a series but I don't really feel like going to the next one right now. But if I wait too long the events won't be as fresh in my mind. What do you do?

>> No.21696364

>>21696230
I think it's because of algorithms and a lot of people spending too much time online.
>content creator makes a video that riles people up
>get recommended and is successful
>more people make such videos for profit
>keeps showing up in people's feed
>affects discourse both online and offline
>loops forever
And now we have this problem. Even back in 2015 I noticed that politics and news media started to feel like arguments on 4chan. I don't think there's any conspiracy, just people chasing money and mucking everything up.

>> No.21696377

>>21696230
Personally, I'm so so soooo tired of low qual dumbshit propaganda catholic threads like yours. If anyone is shitting up this board you are definitely among them. Discuss a book, pick a fight, have fun. There's no need to push your cheap religious drivel into everybody's face. It's not a polite thing to do. At the very effing least come up with something interesting unless you really want to bore people to death

>> No.21696399

Screwing around with streaming consciousness prose today.

"Torn to pieces, the lackluster palindrome was caught off guard right in the middle of the reckless nurse's run.
Down below in the gutters, the deathly decay dusts off the dismembered memory of what little remains of Newton's Genius.
Convalescing, tangled thorns in webs we've weaved through our clever deceit with ever clear wit to contrive a twist.
Way up high above, the magnifique shimmer of all sparkling, there glints the glittery jewel-begemmed shrine that holds the Shining One enskied."
"Devoured, the children of Satan ate their hungry hearts out of their selves, a leathery plushie filled with autumn leaves
A corpse, a body composed of plant fiber and regurgitated dead things
Another Sun-like light flashes, blinds the reverie of ghouls like a too-bright bed-lamp
The sickly sweet sensation of gobs of greasey lard boiling over and over ad nauseam"

" The force of course was more than a horse could extort
The lawyers left lovers in recognition of each other's wasted ambition
Destitute and made barren the calamity that came before us was more than we could afford or even restore us
A thousand gold shilling in the bank to bask in awe of, that can seize a man's mind like a symbol"


"Death and taxes that made us slaves for ages
was not there barely before we could claim the wages
If after all this talking and walking there had been a holy story
that was missed somewhere in the details, a subtle glory
What a good joke that would be, written by God Himself!"

>> No.21696509

>>21696364
i agree, i think it's a bottom-up process, not a top-down kind of thing, if that makes sense.
>>21696377
i'm not catholic, and don't post those kinds of threads. i was only pointing out an example of threads that seem fishy to me; there are many other examples i could have used that don't relate to religion. i named the first that came to mind. i see that you relate to the same basic sentiment i'm talking about

>> No.21696661

>>21696230
All infected by anglo culture are carriers of propaganda.

>> No.21696706

I'm releasing 5 of my concubines for Lent.

>> No.21696709

>>21696092
Dont do it bro

>> No.21696739

>mom is talking about her ex abusive boyfriend to her new potential boyfriend, loudly on the phone for the past 2h, like i'am not in the next room easily able to hear it all
Tell me how i'am supposed to not hate women?

>> No.21696760

>>21696092
Nope. She will absolutely ruin your life in the current political climate. BPD whores are the reason fake rape accusations exist.

>> No.21696761

>>21696739
The only person you should hate is yourself for not moving out.

>> No.21696769

When I'm facing a challenge that's new to me, I always assume the worst scenarios occurring and have little self-belief.
I don't remember this personally, but my mom told me that when I was in first grade of primary, I was very worried about not being able to finish mandatory primary education.
I wonder why that is, why do I always worry so absurdly about the worst things happening? Of course, it continues to this day, I'm just more conscious about it.

>> No.21696791

>>21696739
Desmond Morris taught me to detach and view all the drama as if I'm watching a nature documentary. I later realized, despite having positive sides this is also a pretty autistic coping mechanism. I think the real autists go through something similar but more extreme, like from an incredibly dumb mom yelling nonsense constantly so they just check out at age 2, detach into some dumb analysis like counting or drawing.
https://youtu.be/AaZ9yP4m1z0

>> No.21696822

>>21696074
The idea of being fucked turns me on, something about the degredation of it, of being subjected and used by a strong man, but actually seeing a penis grosses me out. Like dicks are just nasty. Even with regular porn i only ever watch solo women since if a guy is there it's an automatic turn off.
And I've only ever jerked to pics or vids of women.
When i think about what is aesthetically pleasing, the fact is that the female form is just superior. Women look more hygienic, whereas guys are hairy and have this floppy meat rod. Completely revolting.
Yet if you think hard enpugh about how something is disgusting it becomes sexually arousing again. I wonder if anyone has written about this relationship between sex and disgust. It's very strange when you think about it. If something is too disgusting it fails to arouse, but sometimes it is that revolting degrading aspect which makes it arousing.

>> No.21696852

>>21696230
There's always been /pol/tards that invade this board, but I feel like the board's culture has really changed for the worse.
A year ago it wasn't great either but it was really different from what it is today. Idk if I can even articulate what exactly has changed, even outside of the constant tranny threads this place just seems worse now

>> No.21696889

>>21696852
It’s the legit hatred and obsessed, autistic ideologues. Everyone seems to beat their drum no matter what and only that drum

>> No.21697261
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21697261

The memes write themselves. Why is society like this?

>> No.21697288

I just experienced a weird sense of fear thinking about that the shing quote
"Medoc, are you here? / I've been sleepwalking again, my dear. / the plants are moving under the rug."
Feeling gosegumps about a ridbit

>> No.21697356

> censorship
>trannys
>women are the devil
>Jews
>antinatalists
>AI
>leftists

This is like 50% of the catalog. Hell of a board here

>> No.21697361

I have recently begun a practice called 'dream scripting'. It's used to dictate the content of your dreams, you just write down in present tense what you want to occur. I've been 'giving' myself wet dreams among other things, such as hearing beautiful music and such. Though I remember nothing when I wake up, my sleep has very significantly improved.

>> No.21697375

>>21697356
Leftists are rewriting literature and some federal jurisdictions are considering requiring all publicly funded libraries to remove "problematic" texts. These topics are extremely concerning to people that aren't retarded genrefags. The library in my city removed HP Lovecraft(genreshit) for instance, and they do not allow transfers of his works in to their system. It's really shit. It's only a matter of time before the big online retailers ban "problematic" works from being sold and payment processors cancel service to any seller that tries to sell "problematic" content. Then it will be prohibitively expensive to procure real literature.

>> No.21697389
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21697389

>>21697375
>Then it will be prohibitively expensive to procure real literature.
And we all know it won't end there.

>> No.21697402

>>21697375
>Leftists
>literally funding a nazi state and not ending homelessness and providing healthcare to its own citizens with that money.

Morons

>> No.21697410

>>21696074
Cosmicism in literature is truer than pessimism in literature, the latter being a sort of failed optimism. Both pessimism and optimism are warped senses of reality, which are embedded in human ideas and desires. In the least, it is something bound up in the hubris of "humanity," whatever "humanity" is supposed to mean.
A cosmic view in literature is misconstrued as "dark" and "maddening" because humans have for a long time only survived due to the false belief we are the best animal to strut and fret our hour upon the stage. Tell that to the 99.9% of species that have died off for nothing other than our arrogance in the face of an unquantifiable and vast universe.
Adam. Eve. The best creations to ever exist, merely because they can freely act? Whatever. Our sense of self and free will are largely informed by our arrogance. Do you think the cosmos cares about what we think about ourselves?
Cosmicism is not "nihilism," although people (irrational as they are) may come to nihilistic conclusions once they realise how insignificant and tiny humans are in the broader scale of things. They think, quite rightly, that life on Earth is not special by extension. But why go insane? Why believe in nothing when you face the wine-dark sea that never ends, never rests? Oh, sure. One day, entropy will fall apart finally. That's when the universe falls dead in the coldness. But no man, or anything resembling a man, will ever live to see it. That is how small man is.
>That is not dead which can eternal lie,
>And with strange aeons even death may die.
We are a speck of dust floating in a sunbeam. One day, the speck will die. One day the sun beam will shine no more. Why care either way, either pessimistically or otherwise?

>> No.21697472

>>21696083
have sex, incel

>> No.21697698
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21697698

>>21696220

>> No.21697745

I disdain enumerating and clearly explaining that which is clearly obvious to me. I feel that by giving explanation I am tacitly acknowledging that it is intuitively reasonable to be unaware of such basic and cognitively accessible information, and thus providing validation to those poor fools who would require such enlightenment as I am spitefully withholding.

I harbor no pity or compassion for the stupid, and in fact I abhor them rather unfairly.

>> No.21697882

YEEEEESSSS I GOT INTERNET BACK, I'M BACK I'M BACK AND NOW I CAN BE RACIST AGAIN! I HAVE OVER 15 FLASH CARDS WITH IDEAS OF RACIST POSTS I HAVE WANTED TO MAKE FOR WEEKS, NOW IS THE SUMMER OF GEORGE!

>> No.21697910

>>21696074
please come back jesus
i really cant stand it anymore

>> No.21697963
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21697963

I failed to get a DNR after a doctor's appointment last Friday. What do I do bros? The doctor was 'uncomfortable' with giving it to me because I was too young and had no (diagnosed) chronic conditions.

>> No.21697967

>>21697963
I got a BNR when the lady doctor put her finger in my shitter

>> No.21697992
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21697992

I find these threads theraputic. I'd wager other men feel the same. To post their concerns, night dreams and shower soliloquies (?). Me, I like cocaine. I recently purchased three point five grams for 200USD. It was gone in a week. A part of me wishes this habit/addiction/enjoyment/abuse wasnt so commonplace. It makes me feel pedestrian. I wish it was just mine. Crush it flat with a vial press into it with a debit card and divide it and snort both lines with one nostril. Use your finger to run the rest against your gums. Resist smoking or drinking so you feel it drip drip drip. I only use foreign money to snort coke. It makes me feel better than everyone else. When you do drink. Make it a coke. I'm serious. They compliment each other. Alcohol steps all over the feeling and water cleans away the drip, neither of which are good. For coke, use coke.

>> No.21698005

>>21697992
So glad I don't do drugs, anon.

>> No.21698026

>>21697992
Do you live in Australia? I live in south Florida and I can get banging coke for $100 an eightball. The thought of coke is better than the actual usage so I haven’t done it in years. Your post reminds me of 18 year old me just getting into drugs and finding a ritual you like.

>> No.21698091

>>21698026
I'm nearly thirty and American and only buy from overseas. I don't know any drug dealers because I am alone all the time (Bush Glycerine). Though you may have a point, I've only started tasting drugs in the last three years so I probably am like a teenager in that regard. Cocaine while short lived, makes my writing better. I write short stories and haikus. I secretly am a big fan of haikus. I would like to learn japanese for this but I'm lazy and also I don't want to be associated with people who learn japanese. But that's okay. I secretly like my own writing and think some of it is good. Someone on here once told memy writing was like Hemingway but forced. I was very proud of that review. Though I never thought about styles, Hemingway is my favorite author and to be likened to a lesser version of him was high praise. Thouhh Im out of cocaine I have an ample amount of MDMA which I take fingertip fulls of after work.

>>21698005
I would reccomend you steer clear.

>> No.21698130

>>21698091
I was asking because Australia seems to have expensive drugs. I’m clean now but drugs really fucked my development up and it all started with coke. I found out that sniffing it is like riding a bike, smoking crack is like driving a racecar, and shooting it is like holding on to a rocket ship. The latter 2 are the definition of fiendish. There is something perverse when your arms look like they got caught in a sewing machine but you can’t stop. You hit a vein and 2 secs later you have the taste of swallowing a bag of coke. Your ears are ringing, your leaning over a trash can, you think it feels too intense. Yet when it wears off you do it again. Real sick shit. And cocaine wasn’t even the drug that brought me to hell. I hate to preach but be careful. You are playing with fire and everyone thinks it could never happen to them to it does. Boundaries get crossed again and again

>> No.21698144

>>21696769
Planning for the worst is good warfare. But you may just have anxiety due to low self esteem or a lack of skills or perceived lack of skills. Be prepared is a useful mindset to these issues.

>> No.21698157

>>21696399
I like it. But to me it is too consistent. Seems like a poem. Bur perhaps your "stream" is just more consistent than mine.

>> No.21698203

>>21698130
Lucky for me, I have severe "intention" tremors, I had to flee the medical field because I lost the ability to puncture veins. It is unfortunate that your childhood was marred by this addiction. Normally I would ridicule a person with your past because I am a cruel man, but because of your good intentions I can't find the necessary vile. Therefore, while I cannot wish you well, I can reccomend a book and activity I enjoy; The Count of Monte Cristo. It is excellent. And watching neighborhood baseball teams play at a local park in warm weather.

>> No.21698230

>>21698203
I used to be scared of needles too. Thanks for the well wishes but things are great now. That period of my life was over a decade ago and a lot of good came out of it. Nowadays problems seem small and manageable when I was battling my demon every day. Now, I stay positive and don’t let anything get to me me more than it should. I also rediscovered my love of reading in rehab which I think is a pretty fair trade off at the end of the day

>> No.21698278

>>21696074
captcha stop working for anyone else for about 5 minute?

>> No.21698318

>>21698230
So you have a routine or mantra to keep yourself positive? Please explain it. I am interested in routines that people adhere to. I think it allows a person to express themselves in their most honest form.

P.S.
Unfortunately, they were not well wishes. I only wish on my birthday and at wishing pools. I just shared things I enjoy. And I am not scared of needles. I inject steroids and draw my own blood for future injecting. I simply - sadly lack the skill to do it professionally/ within my approved time constraints anymore. Thus I fleed the professional field.

>> No.21698383

Not sure where to move or what to do for work. I have a comfy but low paying remote job I’ll be quitting soon.

>> No.21698519

>decide to stop posting and only lurk gor a few days
>notice dramatic increase in board quality
Damn

>> No.21698541

My life and health has gotten a lot worse since I started remote working 3 years ago.

>> No.21698625
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21698625

>graduated
>qualified for a prestigious field that has no entry positions
>in poverty
>peers are now either PhD candidates on diversity scholarships or miserable technicians

>> No.21698656

>>21698625
>5 years into a quarter life crisis

>> No.21698661

>>21696074
I’m thinking on taking the tripcode pill to keep me honest. What’s my new name?

>> No.21698682

>>21698656
I'm 23 which is practically ancient, and I'm NGMI past 30

>> No.21698685

>>21698682
In 6 years you’ll realize just how young 23 really is

>> No.21698689

I’ve never had more free time and yet I’ve never been less productive.

>> No.21698711

Is it ok to feel deceived / uncertainty even in our closest relationships?

>> No.21698714

>>21698682
A man doesn’t hit his prime till late 30’s or 40’s

>> No.21698795

i think i just have to accept that my body can't process alcohol anymore. my reactions reign from insurmountable fatigue to painful symptoms that require hospitalization. i only feel good after like two beers and then i feel like death

>> No.21698796

>>21698714
Surely this is cope - you lose a lot of energy/physicality by then
>t. not that anon but also 23

>> No.21698811

>>21698796
Look up the ages of the men women consider most attractive. At that point in your life you’ll be financially well off, and more confidence in yourself. My 30’s have been better than my 20’s and I still feel like I’m on the upswing, especially in my romantic life

>> No.21698845

Starvation is finally on the menu.

>> No.21698858

>>21696084
Would be better if jannies and mods did their fucking jobs.

>> No.21698904

>>21698811
Yeah you're probably not wrong and women prefer older men anyway so you bypass the duds in the 24-30 something bracket and go out with someone with far less baggage

>> No.21698922

I just finished watching The Road. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would as I was planning to only watch a few minutes to see how the movie looked. How does it compare to the book?

>> No.21698946

>>21698714
Nah 25 to 35.

>> No.21698948

>>21698661
RagingFaggot69

>> No.21698962

>>21698661
Petey Wheatgrass

>> No.21699000
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21699000

I have seen all things that are done under the sun, and behold all is vanity, and vexation of spirit. The perverse are hard to be corrected, and the number of fools is infinite.

>> No.21699018

>>21696791
>Desmond Morris taught me to detach and view all the drama as if I'm watching a nature documentary
This is literally dissociating and it's extremely unhealthy

>> No.21699024

>>21696822
Your sexual fantasy is detatched from reality. You need a healthy sexual relationship with a woman to cure this

>> No.21699026

>>21698922
Dunno, I don't read.

>> No.21699038

>>21699026
Have you watched the movie?

>> No.21699049

>>21699038
No, I dont watch television or film either, even though I post on /tv/

>> No.21699132

My ideal woman is either 4 foot 9 and light enough for me to pick up with one arm or 6 foot 5 and strong enoough to pick me up with one arm.

>> No.21699253

never thought i'd be so glad to get all of the benzos out of my system. i thought i'd be sleepy forever! i just couldn't get my ass up. i drank like 20 cups of coffee in gummed like a whole pack of those velo pouches and i still couldn't get my ass out of bed

>> No.21699260

>>21699253
what does it feel to be on benzos?

>> No.21699277

Coffee does nothing for me except give anxiety. wtf
I feel more spry when drinking

>> No.21699280

>>21699260
different benzos feel different. they all act on the same set of receptors but what a lot of people don't realize is that there's actually variety within those receptors. there's a few universal effects. they all act as anxiolytics and sedatives to varying degrees, but the euphoria and memory loss vary a lot. i was on librium for my alcohol withdrawal. librium is NOT euphoric. you don't feel anything bad, you're vaguely comfortable, but you're so exhausted it's unreal. xanax, on the other hand, makes you feel like you can do fucking anything you set your mind to and it also erases 90% of your memories the next day. they got novel benzos these days, i've never taken any, but supposedly you can buy all these grey market benzos that've never been condoned for human consumption that have any number of effects (within the established barriers). if you wana have fun take xanax, if you're trying not to have a withdrawal seizure take librium. that's all i really know

>> No.21699296

>recent results of chinese research discovered that frequent consummation of popular beverages like Coca cola and Pepsi raise testosterone levels and can make testicles grow in size
>on the other hand they make ovaries shrink and females less fertile
Interesting. But before you rush to the store, keep in mind this was tested on mice for now, and the risk of obesity and diabetes is still there.

>> No.21699298

>>21699280
I've been on antidepressants and SNRI's but never on benzos. What made you to quit them?

>> No.21699432
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21699432

I was looking at some old Shrek and I felt that beyond "dead", some of these ancient memes are starting to feel movingly innocent, like a child's dream.

I wonder how many anonymous makers of beloved memes are now themselves dead.

In 20 years, the internet will feel like a graveyard.

>> No.21699479

>>21699432
Then we can take a deep dive and explore ancient memes like it's the Titanic.

>> No.21699555

>>21696074
Why do I enjoy being bossed around by one particular ex but absolutely hate it when any other female tries to tell me what to do.

I admitted it to her some time ago and she found it really funny then ever since we've been in this weird situation where she bosses me around, makes me fap or pleasure her on command and all sorts of things. She somehow is able to make me feel so nervous and excited around her but she makes it genuinely fun at the same time cos she smiles and laughs between her bossing me around which just makes me love her again.

Think I should tell her im in love with her again or that I probably never stopped? I really want to be with her again properly but don't know how to go about it

>> No.21699619

I wish I could reconnect with my cousins and old friends.

>> No.21699668

>>21699018
You're literally retarded.

>> No.21699688

Does anyone else find /pol/acks more palatable than the autistic spergs who spew about incels and basements whenever anything remotely topical comes up?

>> No.21699694
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21699694

when desires successfully subsume the role of thoughts, through the instigation of the consumer cartel, does listening to your internal monologue become like reading through your junk mail folder ?

>> No.21699700

>>21699694
No.

>> No.21699705

>>21699688
Hi /pol/.

>> No.21699706

Based on the authors I like, which language should I learn for the sole purpose of reading their literature? I'm between spanish, german and french:
>Hawthorne
>Melville
>Kipling
>James Hogg
>Conrad
>Robert Browning
>Thomas Hardy
>Poe
>RL Stevenson

>> No.21699710

>>21699706
English

>> No.21699718
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21699718

>>21699710
Good point my negro, but besides that?

>> No.21699736

>>21699694
Yes. Repetition is enough and everyone is affected. You have to be conscious of what you consume and why. Cutting all ads from your diet is the first step to recovery. The advertising industry should be gassed, there's no justification for mind control.

>> No.21699748

>>21696092
Dubs and you'll do it

>> No.21699749

Girl I was casually dating/fucking for the past 4 months told me last night that she's been seeing another guy on the side, after I asked her where she thought this was going. I feel like a cuck simp. Anyway that's over now. Books for this feel?

>> No.21699764

How's the pay for freelance copywriting gigs these days? Is it still worth the time and effort?

>> No.21699868
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21699868

I have been growing increasingly sensitive to insults hurled on my ethnos on the internet.

>> No.21699944

>>21699706
French, I'd say. German is more popular as language of technology and philosophy, so you would have troubles finding recommendations for novels.
Poe was highly respected in France, even served as inspiration for some.

>> No.21699963

I’m quitting my job this week but not sure what the next step for me to get where I want is.

>> No.21699986

>>21699764
I did some research on copywriting. It’s like sales, frankly. If you can carve out a little niche of the right sort of jobs you can make good money, but otherwise, it’s so over saturated that it’s tough to make anything substantial.

>> No.21699993

>>21699749
No books can really capture just how awful the dating scene is for young people in the 21st century.

>> No.21700032

>>21699706
Germans were really into romanticism and later developed their own sort of realism/naturalism, so I'd go with them

>> No.21700043

This one time in high school the teacher called on me to answer a question and I wasnt paying attention, so i faked having a seizure. Nobody really reacted or anything so after a minute I just sort of sat back down and never spoke a word to anyone in school ever again

>> No.21700062

>>21700043
We have the best flash fiction folks, believe me.

>> No.21700069

Chaos A.D.
Army in siege
Total alarm
I'm sick of this
Inside the state
War is created
No man's land
What is this shit?!

Chaos A.D.
Disorder unleashed
Starting to burn
Starting to lynch
Silence means death
Stand on your feet
Inner fear
Your worst enemy

>> No.21700075

I'm sick of drinking. For three years I've psyched myself out of realizing I'm an alcoholic by carefully cycling my drinking habits. So, I'll quit drinking during the week, but then I'll binge during the weekend. Then, I'll stop drinking on Fridays and Sundays, but then I'll blackout four Saturdays in a row. Then I'll say, "no drinking this weekend", but sneak in a night or two during the week. I'll lay off beer. Then I'll say that it's whiskey that makes me sick, so I'll drink only vodka. Then I'll drink earlier in the day to solve the problem of having hangovers in the morning.

Anyway, I went cold turkey (two weeks now, the longest since I started hard drinking), and now I'm addicted to cigarettes, and now I'm applying the same autistic habit shifting with smoking. Is this just what being an addict is like? God, I hope it just all phases out of my system and becomes a distant memory.

>> No.21700107

>>21700043
kek

>> No.21700291

>>21696092
absolutely b

>> No.21700300

>>21699479
You can already sort of do it now.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=A-rct5rfgAo
Stuff like this already feels like it was made by some mysterious, lost civilization.

>> No.21700432
File: 17 KB, 362x362, 1671569086602921.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21700432

>>21699868
I'm an asian mutt and find insults against asians and mutts incredibly funny and accurate. I wish a white natty or leftypoltard would make an asianchud meme, I kinda feel left out >:(

>> No.21700433

>>21700075
There was a famous experiment where rats were forced to choose between food and cocaine, and they chose cocaine every time. The results were touted as proof of the power of addiction. However, in later experiments, rats were given the same choice but had a better environment and more social interaction with other rats. These rats always chose the food. I think you can see where I'm going with this. Good luck, Anon.

>> No.21700530

>>21700075
is there a lot of anxiety behind these habits?

>> No.21700532

I feel like I found my interests too late. It is easier to grind art/music/writing/language skills when you are a kid without any responsabilities other than school, but those times are long gone.
Being born in a country where, even with a degree, 50-hour work weeks are the norm doesn't help. I dropped out of uni (twice), so not only do I spend most of the day at work, I can only save money at a glacial pace.

>> No.21700541

Reminder to everyone that whenever you see some pathetic loser post yet another thread about Ayn Rand (an author who may aswell have raped him since his hate for her is so great) don't actually engage with them. Just bully them until they stop acting cringe and demanding that everyone who does not agree with them identify themselves as a Randoid

>> No.21700559

>>21700532
We’re all in this boat because we got sucked into school (prison, scam), video games, and porn (digital heroin) until we were 25 at least.

>> No.21700604

>>21696074
I think my mind has finally broken. I forgot the password to my phone after opening it 5 minutes ago. I couldn't even remember the number after trying for 8 minutes, had to look at the slip of paper with the number.

>> No.21700648

i wonder when i peaked

>> No.21700670

>>21700433
Yeah, I see what you're getting at. Thanks.

>>21700530
Yes, anxiety. Alcohol for me is like a local black hole, and having that first drink or even realizing that drinking is a possibility at hand means crossing over the event horizon, and I basically brace myself for oblivion by pretending to prolong the impending total lack of self-control by creating rituals and switching up the "way" I drink. The entire thing is about anxiety and self-consciousness.

>> No.21700698

>>21700648
For me it was 9 years old.

>> No.21700707

"why are your reps so low?"
my astral phrase for the week

>> No.21700718

>>21700559
I know life owes me nothing but damn, why couldn't I be one of the lucky ones who found out what they liked when they were young? No, thinking about it, I liked editing pokemon sprites as a kid, I would often hum songs I made up, I made up stories and played them out with my toys, and of course, I learned english by myself. But since I was the quiet, smart kid who would ace tests without having to study for them and was good with computers, my parents made me think I was meant to go into CS or something. At the same time, I failed to learn any discipline and my grades plummeted in middle school.

>> No.21700768 [DELETED] 
File: 377 KB, 1135x1145, 1672867840235587.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21700768

Stream of attentionwhoring consciousness incoming...

I can't take it anymore. I want to say "I want to die," yet if so, why am I still living? I don't think I understand my own actions or thoughts anymore. I don't know if I am right or wrong, if I am ill or well, I don't know if I want to live or die, save or kill. I am completely lost.
I told myself that I would get a DNR and from there allow God to decide whether I should go through with my grandiose plans or die from my condition. I got rejected. I went through the rest of the day absolutely unphased, talking to family and posting ebin memes, but internally I am breaking down. The DNR became a sort of focal point for my entire life; it is rather absurd, but for some reason it gave me an inner calmness. It made me feel as though all of my decisions had already been made for me.
I am a dangerous person. I don't like it. I just want to feel normal bros... I just want to see other people smile. I want to hear them laugh and not hear, simultaneously, (if I am to be so edgily dramatic,) the screams of the suffering. I know I'm not perfect, not good, not okay, not fine. I know I am bad, evil, disgusting, reprehensible. I know I have responsibility for my actions, and that my deplorable condition is a result of my poor choices and willing malfeasance.

I don't blame normals for what they do. It is easy to look down on them for being so wrong about so much. They accept easily disproven rhetoric as fact without so much as a thought of resistance, but look what happens to someone when they don't- they become utterly alienated. The average normal isn't stupid or irrational- they know that if they accept that society is lying about almost everything, that the media is purely propaganda, and almost all academic scholarship is falsified, their world will crumble. They refuse to look into the abyss, becausr they don't want it to corrupt them.

Am I to blame them? Bros... I just don't feel so good...

>> No.21701030

I feel like I’m ready to come out of a slump. I just need to figure out my next move.

>> No.21701033

Are all women mermaids?

>> No.21701043

>>21700559
>porn (digital heroin)
You have no idea what a real addiction is like, pussy

>> No.21701078

>>21701043
If you want to have a dick measuring contest over what substance we were addicted to, that’s really pathetic.

>> No.21701083

>>21700718
I don’t know. I’ve had this thought too, but I don’t have anything positive say about it. Some are chosen, some are lucky, and others aren’t, at least not yet.

>> No.21701111

>>21701033
half human half beast or did you mean Sirens?

>> No.21701143

How come heraldry often had evil monsters on them like dragons or mermaids? Was it to deter bandits or what?

>> No.21701188

>>21701083
>at least not yet
Yeah, but even people who seem to be lucky can have their lives go down the shitter suddenly. There's no way to know if you "won" until the game is actually over.

>> No.21701192
File: 33 KB, 119x131, Szirén_(heraldika).png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21701192

>>21701111
Same thing. They expose their human breasts to lure men to their death while hiding their mermaid half in the water.

>> No.21701223
File: 24 KB, 645x770, 23769 - SoyBooru.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21701223

>>21700432
He kinda looks asian. I find many insults funny and true too, but cant help but notice real venom oftentimes.

>> No.21701228

>>21701078
Have you ever missed work because you were too busy jerking off? Do you think about porn all day? Would you suck dick in exchange for porn? Face it, if porn wasn't free, your "addiction" wouldn't even exist. Calling it "digital heroin" just makes you look like a bitch

>> No.21701242

>>21699024
>Your sexual fantasy is detatched from reality
All fantasies are detached from reality .... That is what makes them fantasies.

>> No.21701266
File: 191 KB, 2355x2310, Genius.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21701266

>> No.21701277

>>21701192
are women so deadly to you?

>> No.21701292

>>21701277
Yes. So I avoid women at all costs. I won't be fooled.

>> No.21701303

A warm thursday hello to my non-white brothers

>> No.21701315

Do you think $30k is enough to do nothing but write for a year?

>> No.21701329

>>21701188
That’s true. I think there’s a certain level of fulfillment in understanding your life’s pursuit at a young age though, even if you suffer later. I feel like I could bare any suffering if I was convicted in what I was supposed to do, and I see that in young people sometimes. I have a friend who’s a musical artist that’s now gaining some success. He’s been playing and singing since he was a teenager and never had any doubt that this is what he is going to do. It’s part of him. I admire that a lot and am jealous of it even though I’m actually much older than he is. To have found your task young is a great gift in my mind.

>> No.21701398

Do people really think they're anonymous here?

>> No.21701458

>>21701292
Me too. Women cannot be trusted ever.

>> No.21701515

>>21701315
In a self sustaining farmstead you could pull it off.
Who knows what necessities arise or how bad inflation is going to be in the next year.

>> No.21701518

amateurs think writing should be 90% "witty" quips and people talking to themselves melodramatically, recanting their entire life story every ten minutes to themselves.

>> No.21701535

>>21697375
the left:
>hitler bad! hitler burned books! muh banned books!
also the left:
>that guy named his cat a naughty word 100 years before it was considered a naughty word, we have to burn everything he ever wrote!

kinda funny the moment you realize why humanity won't pass the great filter

>> No.21701547

>>21701192
>lures coomers to their death en masse
based

>> No.21701572

>>21696074
people are always making fun of my fetish online. It kind of feels bad.

>> No.21701582

>>21696092
don't stick your dick in crazy

>> No.21701613

>>21701535
>also the left
Liberals aren’t left. Write it down.

>> No.21701623

>>21701613
The left is subjectivist/relativist-materialist
The right is objectivist-idealist.
That is all.

>> No.21701626

>>21701572
Ball crushing is dangerous. Seek help to break the addiction

>> No.21701632

The guy that posts threads about rhetoric is worse at applying rhetoric than the average 8 year old. Some people really seem to be worse off from reading, their bodies reject meaning, they have an allergy to it.

>> No.21701666

>>21701623
Sooo… the right is always wrong?
I’m not rightwing, but this isn’t the divide.
Liberalism was about freedom, initially from the king, the aristocracy and church’s controls.
First phase of revolution saw just middle class people move into positions of power where they only freed money and markets.
From the start the working class, slaves and serfs saw this as a clear betrayal.
Rightwing always wants ore control, stronger states, or church.
Leftwing wants freedom. You think you’re a freedom loving rightwinger? You’re a moderate that way. In what way exactly I don’t know, but you probably want cops and a rightwing government, maybe more religious influences in society. Guessing. But these are controls and a very conditional “freedom”, not to mention your views on capitalism.

>> No.21701760

>>21696074
I don't understand online debate between feminists and "redpillers". Like the debate just doesn't make sense to me.
My perspective has always been that if women want to work or pursue a career they should be able to, and accept the consequences of choosing that path. And if they want to be a traditional housewife, then they are also free to choose that path. Either way it has exactly zero effect on me.
What more is there to say beyond do what you want.
The lifestyle a woman chooses has zero effect one me, so I could care less if a woman chooses to pursue a career or if she chooses to be a housewife.
Either way I don't see why I should give a shit.

>> No.21701779

>>21701760
>if women want to work or pursue a career they should be able to, and accept the consequences of choosing that path
I think the problem is that some people believe there should be no negative consequences, and if you disagree you are bitter virgin.
Like you, I don't give a fuck but even using what should be common sense counts as picking a side to those people.

>> No.21701797
File: 105 KB, 1104x1011, 1677186735665239.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21701797

There is litetally no evidence of Hunter Gatherer societies being predominantly polygamous, genetic or otherwise.

>> No.21701811

>>21701666
Take your meds schizo?

>> No.21701838
File: 208 KB, 500x437, 34wysyhr.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21701838

>>21701623
>he's still a directionbrain in current year+8

>> No.21701849

>>21701779
>I think the problem is that some people believe there should be no negative consequences, and if you disagree you are bitter virgin.
>Like you, I don't give a fuck but even using what should be common sense counts as picking a side to those people.
True people are primed to immediately sort someone in to either camp, but I feel like to me the only question that at all matters is one of legal rights. And that question has already been settled and so there is little left to say. Women have all the freedom to do as they please, but now some insist that we must also change all of our "attitudes", when from my p.o.v people's attitudes don't matter. How ever a couple decides to divide up their labor it is their decision not mine. People have no sense of privacy today. To me these conversations ought to be private but instead people insist on making these private decisions a matter of public concern.
What people choose to do in their personal lives doesn't matter all that much to me.
If a woman chooses to pursue a career before settling down that decision doesn't affect me.
If a woman chooses to be a housewife, it also doesn't affect me.
Whatever a person decides is what they believe to be in their best interest.
It seems like both sides don't view it that way, and instead believe that everyone else has to share their own exact lifestyle.

>> No.21701889

I am the person behind the xi jinping of weed smoking, hello

>> No.21701896
File: 159 KB, 654x990, 3146E19A-FBCE-4B3E-9E77-62506DA41F9A.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21701896

What’s the best translation of The Trial by Kafka?

>> No.21701922

Are there any gods that have their own gods like how humans have gods? I don't mean like Zeus, but the equivalent of how far gods are above humans.

>> No.21701965

>>21701779
This and although you may say that women are free to be a traditional housewife you may notice that that as an option it is almkst never considered by these people to be positive.

>> No.21701972

>>21701838
>directionbrain
You don't actually give any counterarguments thoughie

>> No.21701989

>>21701666
>Leftwing wants freedom
This. The left is absolutely deafened by ideals of "human liberation" as much as they are by "progress" as a given. Then they feel endlessly depressed whenever they realize the state is never going away. Only pure willfull ignorance can keep them from admitting that they themselves also want control, in a form that is often more pervasive than the last

>> No.21702003

I'm the Thomas De Quincey of jerking off.

>> No.21702006

>>21701965
Well when I say idc I mean it. My mom is a housewife and she seems fine with it.
I don't really see why anyone would have an issue with it, I thought feminists were all about women being able to do as they please. For the purposes of child rearing it seems like it's beneficial to have a parent that's dedicated to the children.

>> No.21702031

How do you cope with having a normal, boring life?

>> No.21702038

>>21701515
In my city, my rent is about $1300 per month so that’s $15,600 per year. That leaves $14,400 for misc. expenses.

>> No.21702058

>>21701972
A counter argument to your arbitrary assignment of terms?

>> No.21702099

>>21696074
---- Solaria ----
804
(Blue Front Amazon)

A huge room is not enough for your or me,
Metropolitan areas mingling with weather, endless conversation,

Suites too remote for irony.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YS0Zz1nkU6g&list=RDMMEEJsBZa9PeU&index=17

>> No.21702174

You forgot yourself but I remember
Eyes of glowing ember
Sun to my dark December
When will it be dawn

https://youtu.be/TjUhXbGdLYo

>> No.21702190

I got a lot of goombs (goomby), and I'm ready to smeen, yo. Oh, the passion of the slime, making me sore over and over. You can see tons of grabbing and handshake-shaped motions in silhouettes. What about the goombs? (My goombs), Gotta get more. You can't have too many goombs (goombiest), and I'm even willing to give my smeen if someone wants to come and take it. You'll have to reach the bungo and poke it with the nub to make it tickle enough to surge like the muscle from headmovies. It's almost impossible, but go ahead and give a try if you're smeen enough!

>> No.21702215

White Anglos are incapable of genuine conversations. Their culture revolves around sarcasm and insults which they pass off as bantering. I have yet to meet a healthy minded Anglo that is a real bro. They're always passive aggressive, neurotic and weird (not in a good way)

There's a real why 4channel HATES Canadians, Brits and Australians because their culture is toxic. Westernized brown women act like retarded (white) Karens, adopting their Anglo accent, their hand waving gestures, their values.

I feel sorry for people growing up in Anglo-centric countries.

>> No.21702256

>>21702215
Western white boomers are heartless people. They kick their kids out of the home once they turn 18 into the cold streets. They don't care if the kids become homeless or drug addicts ("not my problem"). In Asian or European culture, multi-generations live under the same roof so they can save money and have a healthy family relatioship, not so with Anglo whites.

In return, white kids send their boomer parents to retirement homes. The boomers get abused by migrant nurses or black nurses. They get hit and yelled at, as they sit alone in their room and think about their lives. Their kids actively avoid to visit them. Maybe once a year during.

If Asians are "bug people" then Anglo whites are vile soulless monsters. At least Asians have the common human decency to take care of their aged parents. Throwing aged parents into a retirement home is a white concept and institution

>> No.21702268

>>21700075
he's just like me fr fr

>> No.21702276

>>21702058
All terms are arbitrary, aren't they?

>> No.21702284

>>21701292
Based volcel

>> No.21702348

>>21702215
Sounds about right. I've grown up and lived in the midwest U.S all my life.
There's something very cold and sterile about white families here. We call it "midwestern nice", but as far as I can observe what it really means is that everyone is superficially nice, but there's this real lack of passion and kind of muted sensibility. Quiet despair...
Everyone is superficially polite, but everyone is kind of detached.
I took a class that had a lot international students some from Latin American and one from India. One of the interesting cultural observations the Indian student made was that strangers here in the street never hold a gaze but very quickly look away, whereas in India it was common for people to just gaze right into your eyes without looking away.

>> No.21702352

Never have I seen a place for books discussing trannies so much

>> No.21702360

>>21702352
Trannies are the tip of the spear of evil today, if an evil person isn't a tranny himself then he likely knows trannies or is on the verge of becoming one himself. Naming evil and alerting others to its presence is the first step in destroying it.

>> No.21702366
File: 66 KB, 500x500, 40FFE305-4B66-48C2-B8F2-5278F47434D5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21702366

>>21702360

>> No.21702373

>>21702366
>iphone filename
Tranny

>> No.21702382

>>21702256
>They kick their kids out of the home once they turn 18 into the cold streets
I dont get this meme. It's literally untrue. Why do europeans think they're experts on american life?

>> No.21702393

>>21702352
Thats because every other place for discussing books is mostly populated by trannies

>> No.21702396

>>21702348
>There's something very cold and sterile about white families here.

What causes that? Anglos have a high sense of paranoia, thus they create low trust, authoritarian government and institutions (think IRS)

>> No.21702406

>>21702382
>I dont get this meme. It's literally untrue.

It is literally true.

https://www.quora.com/Why-do-some-American-families-kick-their-children-out-of-the-house-when-they-turn-18-even-if-they-are-still-in-high-school?share=1

>> No.21702408

>>21700075
Just think of it as medicine. I have my medicinal ethanol every friday night. It keeps me fresh for the rest of the week
>>21700433
Yeah, I nearly dropped my binge drinking and excessive masturbation habits when I finally got social, but then the fucking pandemic happened. I cannot express how angry I am about all the lockdown bullshit

>> No.21702416

>>21702393
So discuss books, not trannies

>> No.21702417

>>21700648
>well educated
>good job
>independent
>social life
>gf
>presuming you're not fat or ugly
>only 24
Nigger you're at your peak now andcan maintain it for years if you dont destroy your body

>> No.21702431

>>21700718
Some people never find out what their passion is. Others arent even capable of passion. I used to be very passionate and gave my life to those things until I realized that I dont actually care about any of it. Makes me feel like a husk. Dont wory about it man. You know what you like so just give yourswlf to it

>> No.21702434

>>21699668
Amazing commentary. You really have a lot to add.

>> No.21702445

>>21702416
If you want to discuss books then go mingle with the trannies.

>> No.21702448

>>21702031
Become slightly insane, have periods of erratic sleep paterns, start occasionally day drinking out of nowhere and for no good reason, start staring at people in public as they walk by, steal small useless things, order some research chem variety of LSD and take small doses randomly, start awkward conversations with strangers for no reason, take long walks without a destination in mind, you really don't have to do anything big to cope with the drag of ordinary life, but when you get the feeling of "I don't want to do anything" just get up and do whatever you can think of, even if it's stupid or slightly reckless, it won't fuck up your normal life

>> No.21702453

>>21702406
>quora.com

>> No.21702460

https://soundcloud.com/alessandro-bosetti/plane-talea-31-34-excerpt-3

>> No.21702467

The mindless and impotent sad posting here really irritates me. And then I get sad about something retarded and blogpost all day about it. Wish I could escape this shit and just sieze my life and stop bejng a whiney faggot like the rest of you

>> No.21702469

The last 3 years have really been a disaster for me in terms of my life goals and personal ambitions. I don’t know if I’ll ever recover.

>> No.21702487

>>21702453
not OP, but quora is unironically a good website, some of the reply guys are pretty interesting, once found a chinese guy who was working in finance and half of his replies were about chinese trade and protectonists policies and how their style of drafting trade laws and economic development plans differed from the EU. It's like a mini blog with little moderation for people that post with their clear names and CV attached in their bios, sometimes there's pretty interesting stuff on there.

>> No.21702490
File: 1.69 MB, 740x1129, 149450C1-0668-463E-8FCC-4D32572F58C5.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21702490

>>21696074
I go through periods of hating blacks and other minorities and holding antisemetic opinions. Then I have stretches of time where I am full of love for my fellow human beings and want to help bring about systemic change. Sometimes it fluctuates on a daily basis.

Is this normal, or am I mentally ill? I thought to be a schizo you kind of stick to one position e.g. raging neo-nazi conspiracy theorist or tranny who cuts their dick off for communism. I hate liberals and centrists so it's not a case of swinging right from a centrist position, it's like a full pendulum swoop.

>> No.21702494

>>21702460
https://kaer-uiks.bandcamp.com/album/copnvvvs

>> No.21702530

>>21702490
You're just suffering the disease of being a white man (either Mutt, Anglo or Germanic)

Whites tend to care about non-whites or Jews. Asians just work to build capital. Blacks enjoy life. Mexicans too busy working. Whites? Busy thinking about colored people and Jews.

>> No.21702539

>>21702396
>What causes that?
I have no clue. Protestantism? Maybe just the sheer size of America leads people to value independence for its own sake.

>> No.21702561

>>21696074
>be me 25
>develop some kind of mental illness
>take loads of amphetamines, drink myself nearly to death, take opiates and benzos
>have a severe mental breakdown
>in and out of psych ward for next 5 years
>can't hold down a job
>finally start to get better
>decide to go to grad school for philosophy
>shitting bricks about the whole situation because I'm so unprepared and have huge imposter syndrome
>start grad school and everyone around me is really, really unimpressive, naive and don't even seem to care that much about anything
>even the PhD students seem kind of dumb

Wtf is going on? I don't consider myself very intelligent but why is everyone a complete retard? I destroyed my brain for years and barely read anything during that time and I am one of the top students. I honestly see more interesting discussions on here that at grad school. The academy is fucked.

>> No.21702579

>>21702561
Everyone considers themselves smart and everyone else dumb. It’s almost part of the human condition

>> No.21702599

>>21702579
No I'm genuinely not very smart and turned my brain to mush on top of that.

>> No.21702619

They say it's all about hardness, so I've been kegeling. What they didn't tell me was how much better it would make my orgasms.

>> No.21702628

>>21702561
The bell curve of elite/wealthy intelligence has become much more clustered around the middle since the 1950s, due to mass education and multikulti/cosmopolitan propaganda ("make 'em all equal" = lowest common denominator), faggot lifestyles and constant fag-enabling, and general stagnation and dilution due to a lack of elite circulation.

Did you know that one of the strongest and most consistent correlations with IQ is reaction time, and that while we don't have IQ tests for random average people lacking all formal education 150+ years ago, we DO have reaction time tests of the same type used today, and if the correlation holds, then the average uneducated person was several standard deviations more intelligent than today's average educated person?

Grad school is like a junk bin for failures even relative to elites. It's where you send your gay loser kid who wasn't smart or motivated enough to at least become a dentist or lawyer or something. It's just a way to seem like you're still doing something while not really doing anything. The average PhD student at an elite institution today is dumber than the average undergrad at a state school 50 years ago, literally. Also, every other woman is now "getting a PhD." They all get vanity PhDs now, including full blown 90 IQ retard shouldn't even be in higher ed ones.

>> No.21702642

>>21702628
>The bell curve of elite/wealthy intelligence has become much more clustered around the middle since the 1950s, due to mass education and multikulti/cosmopolitan propaganda ("make 'em all equal" = lowest common denominator), faggot lifestyles and constant fag-enabling, and general stagnation and dilution due to a lack of elite circulation.
You should read The Culture of Narcissism. Mass standardised education was a mistake

>> No.21702656

>>21702348
>I took a class that had a lot international students some from Latin American and one from India. One of the interesting cultural observations the Indian student made was that strangers here in the street never hold a gaze but very quickly look away, whereas in India it was common for people to just gaze right into your eyes without looking away.

Because in America, if you hold your glaze for too long, they want to fight you. America is a low trust, violent society.

>> No.21702661

>>21702656
To add, in India everyone is like a "brother". Blacks start saying 'bro" and "brother", whites copied. White Americans used to say "buddy" but it got replaced with "bro" and "bruh"

>> No.21702668

>>21702642
I keep meaning to. Have you ever read Lebedoff's The New Elite? It's short and overlaps with a lot of what Lasch says

>> No.21702685

It hurts bros...
I want this pain to end. I want all of this to end. I can't take it. I don't want to be like this. I am drowning.
I want someone to help me, but I know I can't be helped. I have already lost. I hate that my family knows that I exist. I want to be forgotten. I want to be unknown.
why can't I die
why did I survive
Why do I live

>> No.21702692

>>21702656
>America is a low trust, violent society.

A good example of white paranoia in America is a Karen calling the cops because she saw a white van parked in front of her home. A white mom will let her kids pay outside anymore because of the fear of violence / kidnapping. In America, you need a reference letter, bank account statements and such to rent an apartment, which doesn't happen in other parts of the world.

>> No.21702709

>>21702692
>In America, you need a reference letter, bank account statements and such to rent an apartment
In Australia you need proof of income, past rental records plus personal and work references so it's not really a beast limited America
>>21702668
I haven't but now you've got me digging around for a copy on libgen or zlib. Since when did you need to sign in to zlib?

>> No.21702733

Earlier today I made some boiled eggs and crepes for breakfast. Put the crepes and egg and the blueberry sauce for the crepes in the same bowl. A bit of the sauce got on the egg and it stained the outer part this light grey color. I’ve been trying to figure out why in passing all day.

>> No.21702747

>>21702038
honestly people rag on how "expensive" cities are, but you dont need much here. i live in a HCOL and my rent is 1400 because it's really small. meanwhile in rural areas you don't get a choice, there's nothing to rent and you just have to buy outright or rot in a hole. i dont need a car or anything here. even for remote jobs, the fact that i live in [glamorous city] goes far to impress companies. meanwhile they pass over the schmuck living in flyover nowhere.

my cost of living in a hcol is less than 30k a year

>> No.21702760

>>21702709
>In Australia you need proof of income, past rental records plus personal and work references so it's not really a beast limited America

I forgot to add, it's an Anglo/white country thing. Asia, Middle East, and Africa you don't need all those paperwork to rent an apartment. You just need to pay 1st month deposit and 1st month rent to move in.

>> No.21702765

>>21702760
Obviously you need to sign a contract saying that you'll rent for 6 months or a year. But they won't need the bank statements, letter of reference, employment letters etc. Why? Because it's a high trust society vs Anglo's low trust society.

>> No.21702770

>>21702382
it is true for a lot of us. my piece of shit father tried charging me rent. not even a nominal amount, either--as much as a nice apartment in a nice area cost, to rent my lead-paint mold-ceiling ghetto-located garbage childhood bedroom and be subjected to his bullshit. i was in college and didn't have a job because i was trying to study.

i dont speak to him anymore. never paid btw, i went to a dorm and got myself into debt. the dorm room cost the same as he tried to charge me, but it wasn't an hour from campus, it was clean and new, and i didn't have a piece of shit screaming at me all day and night and talking down to me. i'm an only child too. he's dying alone for his bullshit. he's an alcoholic with depression, has no assets, is in debt up to his eyeballs, and owns guns. he's goign to bite a shotgun shell one day. i don't even think the police will be able to notify me that he's dead, either. i walked out and wont know if he lives or dies. didn't try to explain, or get in an argument. just ghosted his stupid ass. it's the worst way i could figure to hurt him. that fucker tried to ruin my life but ended up ruining his own.

american parents are psychotic. i dont have one memory of that fucker that wasn't him screaming and carrying on like a chimpanzee or being piss drunk or in one of his depressive hissy fits. he's pathetic and a miserable loser.

>> No.21702796

>>21702561
Academia exists to make midwits into the perfect bureaucrats

>> No.21702800

>>21702770
my mother is a piece of work, too. she got the same ghosting treatment and i know she sobs about it every day and she deserves to. i hope she kills herself.

typical broken (white) family because both my "parents" are insufferable dickheads who can't function in life and have horrible personalities.

i know another guy my age, his mother is a miserable retarded nutjob. only reason he doesn't ghost her is that he wants that inheritence. he's set up for 5-10 million. my parents have nothing but debt so my decision was easy. parents here treat their children as emotional punching bags and abused them wtih impunity, thinking they were kids and would never remember. but they remembered. now? 1 in 4 americans is estranged from a family member. imagine people so insufferable even their own family walks out and wipes their hands of them. you cannot fathom how disordered and psychopathic someone has to be for their own child to want nothing to do with them. but it's a reality for a LOT of people--it just doesn't get talked about in polite conversation.

>> No.21702806

>>21702656
Indians are actually very endearing because they are super friendly. They remind me of puppies

>> No.21702813

>>21702692
>A good example of white paranoia in America is a Karen calling the cops because she saw a white van parked in front of her home
Is this a real example or one of those fake and gay conventional wisdoms that never actually happens

>> No.21702824

>>21702747
>my rent is 1400 because it's really small.
You're paying 1400 a month to live in a box and you're perspective is so warped that you think thats a great deal

>> No.21702831

When they put chemicals in the water that made the frigging frogs gay I didn't speak up because I was not a gay frog.

>> No.21702838

>>21702770
>and owns guns
And this is a sign of bad character or are you just saying suicide is inevitable?
>american parents are psychotic.
Genuinely very sorry to hear about your situation, but i dont think it's representative of the country as a whole.

>> No.21702839

>>21702800
>typical broken (white) family because both my "parents" are insufferable dickheads who can't function in life and have horrible personalities.

Now imagine working with these mentally ill white people in the work place. White Americans and other Anglocentric countries like Canada and Australia have a penchant for committing "m*ss voooolenceeee" in the work place which doesn't happen in other parts of the world

>> No.21702843

>>21702813
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KqARrnQdcQM

Countless examples on youtube

>> No.21702848

>>21702839
>doesn't happen in other parts of the world
Huh? What? Are you telling me that Latin America, Africa, the Middle East, and South and South East Asia are these paradises where violence doesnt exist?

>> No.21702850

>>21702843
>race bait msm propaganda
Fake and gay

>> No.21702857

>>21702824
protip: if i wanted to move to a trailer park in hillbilly land, i could. i don't. there's a reason you're too dumb to understand. the kids who stay in the dead end towns stay poor for a reason. the kids who move to the city end up with fat bank accounts despite higher rent for a reason.

i'm not some pig who needs a 3000 sq ft mcmansion to fill with consoomer crap.

>> No.21702868

>>21702857
Less than 10 percent of americans live in trailers. Are you so stuck in your little bubble that you think the only options in life are paying out the ass for a prison cell sized studio or living in a trailer with cletus?
>i'm not some pig who needs a 3000 sq ft
No, you're just bugman who has panic attacks when he isnt overcrowded

>> No.21702870

>>21702838
nah, i also own guns, but he is going to suck a shotgun sooner or later and it's all of his own making.
>>21702839
exactly. every toxic boss or infuriating coworker? they treat their family even worse. there are people out there who hate these dickheads enough to fantasize about killing them. america is a demonic soulless place, most of the people here have a personality disorder and are severely unhinged. you don't find functional, decent, rational people here, just nutjobs of one variety or another. america is an open air asylum.

>> No.21702877

>>21702868
i could live where you live. i don't want to. seethe harder. you're the little faggot who needs a safe space so he can hide from the world out in your little boring suburb. your life consists of driving back and forth to walmart.

>> No.21702894

>>21702877
You're having a fit because I told you you're overpaying on rent. And now you're coping by saying the only alternative is living in Oklahoma. It's obvious you dont travel.

>> No.21702913

>>21702894
>n-no, you're the one who is angry!
the other guy and i were having a conversation before you butted in

>> No.21702927

>>21702913
And now you're interjecting to declare how not angry you are about a conversation you werent part of.

>> No.21702940

>>21696074
I am starting to think I might be a very unsensible person. Completely artistically dead.
Wagner's tanhauser overture does nothing for me, really. If anyone listens to wagner, what do you think his best piece is?
I want to listen to it.

>> No.21702952

>>21702870
>america is a demonic soulless place, most of the people here have a personality disorder and are severely unhinged. you don't find functional, decent, rational people here, just nutjobs of one variety or another. america is an open air asylum.

Try moving out of Ameica, you'll be happier. America is a shithole full of retarded whites, violent blacks. White cucks kneel for black people lol

>> No.21702956

I have too many goals. At this rate, I’ll never achieve any of them, let alone all of them.

>> No.21702983
File: 384 KB, 1758x348, LMFAO.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21702983

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RepfIDm3qu4
Alright bros, I’m seethin. Why is this shit allowed? WHY THE FUCK IS THIS ALLOWED?!!

Why, in a world where teachers lose their jobs for a private onlyfans and nurses/cops are treated like demons for a 10 second TikTok dance, can bald Andy Dick make a video showing patients in surgery with half their faces blurred? How has human squidward not had his license revoked for constantly catering to page six, reddit gossip faggotry? Why is this ugly faggot who is in dire need of a nose job and hair transplant the one making videos on people’s looks? All of these fuckers with medical and law degrees should have to sign a piece of paper saying that using their knowledge for social media content is an automatic fireable offense. That goes for “tea spillers”/gossip channels like A Psych For Sore Minds, LegalEagle, these “professional faggot reviews gay movie scenes”, etc. Why spend over $100,000 on a degree and then establish yourself as a working professional to then become an influencer talking about bullshit like a middle school girl spreading rumors?

Why would anyone with self respect give these narcissistic psychos business? I can’t imagine going to a doctor and then finding out he’s trying to become a professional YouTuber. All these people with patients or clients shouldn’t make videos until they’ve retired. Why are these rich, powerful fucks not satisfied with money and power; why do they need fame too?

>> No.21702995

>Last two hours were people seething of Americans
Rent Free

>> No.21703023

Why do I keep waking up at around 4:30 every single night.

>> No.21703033

I found a glitch that lets you read this book without having to create an account and borrow it. Flip to the end of the table of contents (left side) and the hidden page on the right side. Press F5. The hidden page is now visible. Flip to the next page which has both sides hidden. Press F5 again. Both pages are visible.
https://archive.org/details/imaginaryworlds00linc/page/4/mode/2up

>> No.21703036

This is stupid but I look back with regret when I was scrolling through Amazon and saw a brand new Ulysses Grant Library of America listed for $7. I had no interest in his so I scrolled by. A couple minutes later I changed my mind but by the time I got there the price was fixed. Life can be cruel sometimes

>> No.21703077

>>21703033
It works! Thanks anon

>> No.21703084
File: 331 KB, 1198x534, 1.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703084

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iDn2UfyWC0Y
>Professor with ”They” pronoun
>Pushes the idea Achilles and Patroclus were lovers
>Doesn’t realize Achilles dressing as a woman was played for laughs because it was so ridiculous to ancient audiences.
Pack it up fellas. Modernity won.

>> No.21703085 [DELETED] 
File: 6 KB, 250x250, tired.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703085

>>21702417
she dumped me in October

>> No.21703087

>>21703084
>disciplinary promiscuous
bet they thought they were real witty when they wrote that

>> No.21703104

>>21696074
I don’t know what I’m afraid of, I recite as I sit at the bar and lock eyes with a pretty young girl who gives me a wink. I don’t know, and I lie to myself once more.
That intimacy, that sensitivity, that feeling, it escapes my grasp. The lesson learned through such harsh circumstances has left a scar deeper than any blade can reach—I dream of holding a young woman once more, the smooth skin and perfect curves wrapped about such personal fear.
I take one more swig of my cheap beer.
I’m better off not knowing what I’m missing.

>> No.21703110

>>21703087
Transgenderism and its consequences have been a disaster for tomboys

>> No.21703113

>>21696092
do it

>> No.21703118

Falling into the wrong career feels like a huge error with long run ramifications

>> No.21703157

>>21702983
>That goes for “tea spillers”/gossip channels like A Psych For Sore Minds, LegalEagle, these “professional faggot reviews gay movie scenes”
I want to punch LegalEagle's smug face so bad. He just seems like such an insufferable douche bag.
As to how these channels are popular, there's a certain class of aspiring upper middle class try tards that eat this shit up out of a desire to feel professional them selves. I know because my brother is one of these people.

>> No.21703158

I've gotten old. I'll never make love with a 19yo again, unless I'm paying, I suppose.
I'll never be in a relationship with a woman whose body count you can number on one hand. Someone who wasn't fucked by whole armies of people by the time I get to her. I'll never trust a woman again in a relationship.
If there's something I got from books was a hunger for a life that doesn't exist anymore. Religion couldn't fix my problem either. Would've been good if I held only the Virgin Mary or some other fictional character up to any standard and were loose in my judgment about the others, but I just can't help it. When I see the girl as a used up whore it's over.
Maybe I just wanted too much from life.

>> No.21703207

The Whale starring Brendan Fraser because memes and I also liked the boring parts about whales because I know it distracts him from his misery using memes. It reminds me of my own memes.

>> No.21703210

>>21702813
This is definitely real, though not all Americans are like this.
My parents had our cousin look after our house/petsit while we were on vacation.
Anyways he invites some friends over, and I think he even let my parents know.
They were just out on our driveway shooting hoops and our neighbor calls the cops on them.

>> No.21703217

>>21696074
I'm quite frustrated with my tendency to find 2-3 days where I bang out 8-10,000 words and then I just don't write for about a month. Consistency is my greatest enemy

>> No.21703222
File: 158 KB, 556x417, 59F880CE-20A9-41B7-B48F-091896769378.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703222

>>21696074
THEY WILL NEVER STOP THE HECKIN’ KEKS

>> No.21703223

>>21696338
Back to back. I was planning on reading a classic lit book in between each ASOIF book, but I've just been powering through them in order instead

>> No.21703338
File: 118 KB, 543x736, cynara_rosewine.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703338

You said, "Never pick sides. Never choose between two." Well, I just wanted you. I just wanted you.

>> No.21703383
File: 116 KB, 1080x1080, Bored.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703383

"Now we get to see how well your nerves are calibrated. Whether or not the software in your head can correctly move your body in the direction it needs to go. Conflict & pain are excellent teachers. Pain, next word: Trauma, is the best in my opinion."

"Why is what I went through traumatic?"

"Because a lot of people listened to your friend. A lot of people you don't know."

"A lot of people I don't know."

Another timing lag between vocal tones, "Because it's a repeating pattern. And there are a lot of people that covet patterns. They play such a marvelous role in constructing complexity."

>> No.21703387

>>21703157
>. I know because my brother is one of these people.
my condolences

>> No.21703587

>Had almost ten different dating app thots lined up for dates this weekend
>they all flake
Tbh there’s a couple that haven’t answered yet and might surprise me, but fuck. I can’t understand how those guys who chat up women one at a time and get invested on them deal with this kind of shit. I don’t really feel anything about them besides frustration. If any of them had sentimental value to me I would probably be crushed by how cold and uncaring the average woman is.

>> No.21703687

sneed

>> No.21703695
File: 179 KB, 1080x1327, Fo79CJKXwAArB9h.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703695

At 25 I finally moved out of my parents' home without even telling them

>> No.21703703

>>21703085
I told you that would result in a depression arc. Hope it was worth the yoga

>> No.21703717

>>21703084
Just had a class where the professor asked us to introduce ourselves and our pronouns. Half the class just ignored the pronoun thing and said their name. But a few of the kids were saying some weird shit
>he/they
>her/his/theirs/its
And some fat dyke who claimed to be male. I'm remembering why I dropped out of college years ago.

>> No.21703773

>>21703717
>Half the class just ignored the pronoun thing
it just proves that people have to so heavily propagandised to actually accept fags and trannies

>> No.21703780
File: 11 KB, 399x399, boomer.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703780

>go on twitter
>it's a bald boomer writing stupid platitudes trying to get clout so he can sell more of his products

Like who the fuck subscribes to the gay boomer?

>> No.21703785

>>21703695

https://youtu.be/dq-yxTD9eF8

>> No.21703790
File: 56 KB, 894x392, fag.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703790

>>21703780
>another fag tweeting the obvious

Are there any based people to follow on twitter? I have only recently used it. (using it with a purpose, I'm trying to find a job/ sell stuff to people)

>> No.21703832
File: 60 KB, 1200x1200, 1200x1200bb-75.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703832

>>21703084
>>21703717
>>21703773
Come home white man.

>> No.21703835

>>21703832
lol /lit/ is definitely the funniest board

>> No.21703839

Update on life project, I'm thinking of a name but I'd rather not give one because then I won't be anon anymore. I'd be the Xi Jiping of double-living or something.
Anyways. Things are going smoothly but I don't have time for myself and it's making me crazy. Speaking of crazy, the psych ward girl got out of the psych ward and we spent time with each other. She offered me to sleep with her for the night last time but I live like 2 minutes away from her place and refused because I still have some sense and would rather not open the door to regret-fucking an 19 year old with big mental issues.

Anons here will tell me to do it but that's just how western civilization is failing in the first place. It's also an excuse for her to disappear later when she gets older because I won't be just a friend anymore. I've already played that game too many times and saw it always ends the same way.

The other lives are on pause right now. I blocked a girl friend from my old city. She was also friends with my ex and I recently found out she lied to me about a lot. That's probably a future social circle down the drain but my ex can go fuck herself with her lying friends. I still have about 2 or 3 social circles if I stretch out to recontact old mates available in my old city. Not dire enough to panick.

That's about it then. Total : 2-3 social circles in old city, 3-4 social circles in new city, and 3 women not counting the psych ward one I can talk with. Blogposting over, anon out.

>> No.21703840

>>21703773
Most of the students who did say their pronouns did so very uncomfortably and uncertainly. Only the usual suspects were forward with it.

>> No.21703841

>>21703839
>Anons here will tell me to do it but that's just how western civilization is failing in the first place
I told you explicitly not to do it

>> No.21703847

>>21703840
The emperor has no clothes

>> No.21703856

>>21703703
do you have a folder on me or somethign, how do you remember all this

>> No.21703869
File: 61 KB, 416x758, karen7.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21703869

>>21703835
White Canadians demand for EVERYTHING but give very little in return. Think of the Anglo settlers that first came to Canada. They DEMANDED the Indians to hand over the land. As customers, white Canadians will complain and demand when their dining experience isn't right and DEMAND they speak to the manager. White waiters DEMAND tips. You can't help but cringe at white Canadians, they're like over-grown babies.

>> No.21703871

>>21703869
what did he mean by this?

>> No.21703880

>>21703856
I'm in these threads literally all day.

>> No.21704061

Jet lag is fucking me up. I can’t sleep

>> No.21704078

>>21696074
>Volunteer at a thrift store.
>Do their testing/tagging so they can sell electrical goods
>Come in one week and say to the manager that I need more of their tags cos we ran out
>They don't have any left
>Makes it out like it's my fault that I didn't let her know the pack she originally gave me was running low
>She literally gave me that last and only pack like 2 months ago when I started because im the only one who can do the testing/tagging, so you would think that after knowingly giving my that pack that she should order a back up one.

There was another incident like this where, when their scrap metal bin (for electrical items that didn't pass) was full. I did a courtesy call one day to let them know I couldn't come in, and just mentioned I forgot to tell her last time that the bin was full and needed to be picked up. She also tried to make it out that it was my responsibility to be organising that stuff when I literally had just started and volunteered like 5 or so times and don't know their procedure or who they even use to organise this. Heck when I came in the following week they hadn't even organised the arrangement with the local scrap metal company used (this thrift store is relatively new), they just had their number. But somehow expected me, a new volunteer to set up and organise it? Lol wtf?


I mean at the end of the day I'm just a volunteer and don't need to be there and can just let everything pile up and start filling up their general waste bin with metal stuff that they can recycle or save costs on.

It's pretty funny, but why are women managers like this and refuse to take accountability? And why....knowingly that you rely on volunteers would you be throwing them under the bus? It's so bizarre lol

>> No.21704141

I took steps to kms but backed out. I'm such retarded bitch desu lmao

>> No.21704146

>>21704141
What made you to back out?

>> No.21704269

My girlfriend will come over today and its highly likely we both will lose our virginities to each other.

Wish me luck.

>> No.21704280

>>21704269
Eat her pussy.

Lick her pussy.

Bite her pussy.

Finger her pussy.

Put your cock in her pussy.

>> No.21704332

>>21704280
I dont follow you.

>> No.21704338

>>21704280
he meant his handholding virginity you sick freak

>> No.21704362

>>21704280
I forgot to add, cum in her pussy. Get her pregnant. Skip town when she's pregnant.

>> No.21704378

>>21704362
SPARE PARTS
AND BROOOOOKEN HEARTS
KEEP THE WORLD TUUUUUUURNING
TURNING ROUND

>> No.21704408

>>21696074
---- Solaria ----
806
(Musique Concrete)

In winter's deepest midnight
Grid sounds assemble a nocturne

Of peace faintly hilarious in its implications.

I can tell it's a passenger train
Passing faraway by the engine's

Whispering purr, mellow horn, lack
Of that thundering weight one feels

Almost through the ground from a freight mile
Passing three times farther away.

I picture the litter of torpid corvids
Not really dreaming like neighbors in their beds

In the vision sweep considerate as can be--
Montage almost like an essay.

>> No.21704419
File: 533 KB, 870x671, motivation.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
21704419

>>21704332
One thing I noticed about Anglos and white western people is their use of excessive sarcasm. Whites are incapable of witty jokes, so they use the lowest form of humor, which is sarcasm. Similar to your reddit whyte basedboys that use puns because they're incapable of generating their own witty joke. White Americans are fucking lame now that I think about it.

>> No.21704425

>>21704419

White Americans don't have their own cool culture, so they steal from blacks. White kids use black slangs like "for real, for real", "no cap", "bruh". Moreover, the most passive aggressive type of people are whites. Whites also like to virtue signal, so they can win social points from other whites. It's so tiring being around white Americans desu.

>> No.21704444

>>21704419
relax bro

>> No.21704473

>>21704408
That's a good poetry.

>> No.21704502

>>21696661
This is about right. It's not that complicated. Anyone that engages heavily in the anglonet Carrie's its ideas. It was how there was a BLM March in Auckland and a grandma from Taranaki thats never been to America can be a hardcore MAGAite (just an example from my country).

>> No.21704546

>>21704419
>>21704425
accurate. it is God's plan to rid the world of them, though He did not need to plan much—they shall do it themselves: whether by blood or culture. a shame to see a once great people reduced to scraps and deadends. even now their dregs wheeze their death rattles in these lonesome virtual halls. their real world is no respite, and they would rather cause suffering than simply bear it. poor animals.

>> No.21704560

novyj
>>21704558

>> No.21704567

>>21696230
It's basically autogynephobia. They obsess about trannies because they're primed to become trannies. People who post this kind of bs are the most likely to go into it. Most of these people had the same 4chanoid opinions beforehand.

>> No.21704583

>>21696338
I've read some books which have different seldom-related content by jumping ahead. None of them were novels, mostly "philosophical" books.

And STEM books, that's hoe you read them in the first place.

>> No.21704620

>>21704269
Wait til marriage

>> No.21704790

I have a wfh job that asks for me to be by the computer for 40 hours per week but only asks for a few, maybe no more than 5 hours per week of actual work. It offers great benefits and a pension. Still, I just hate it so much. I’m torn between trying to work on a passion project off the clock and just quitting and going all in.

>> No.21705015

>>21704790
I can tell you've already sufficient detachment. don't worry about that. In general you can't go wrong indulging in conversation with those immediately around you, whatever else you plan.

>> No.21705066

>>21705015
Do you mean sufficient detachment to leave the job, or to stay in it? I don’t really have anyone around me I trust to offer advice to be honest.

>> No.21705995

>>21702561
you're probably not as smart/high achieving as you think you are. your classmates are probably saying the same exact thing about you

t. former philosophy grad student and lawyer