/wg/ Writing General

[Anonymous No.21618148]

"Glass forest" Edition

Previous thread: >>21604754

/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ
RESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvC

Please limit excerpts to one post.
Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.
Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.
If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.
Violent shills should be ignored and reported.

Simple guides on writing:
https://youtu.be/pHdzv1NfZRM
https://youtu.be/whPnobbck9s
https://youtu.be/YAKcbvioxFk

Thread Theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEqPX-Z833Y

[Anonymous No.21618153]

how much do you guys outline?

[Anonymous No.21618165]

“Ah!” She threw her head back and twisted her shoulders. “You wound me. Here and here and here and here and here too! These stabs of truth, you cruel man,” she said as she jabbed herself in every bullet scar from top to bottom, leaving her finger on the one next to her navel. Then she dropped the actress’ affectation and grinned again. “Well, I guess technically it was your friend that wounded dear old me. You never… stabbed me.”

Elliot’s eyes flicked to his hand. She had pinned it with her own and worked her fingers in between his so she could roll his wedding ring with her thumb. “Why the hell are you even on this case, Tabby? You’re not a detective. You’re not even a bodyguard. You’re the snake they send to worm her way into organizations to snitch on them, you walking honeypot.”

She slumped, her hair cascading across her tilted face before she sighed and brushed it back. “I could give you the justification I used, but isn’t it enough that it was to see you? My dear savior? The man who ran away from me? Justice incarnate from behind the barrel of a gun… You’ve fallen so low, Tom. You’re a damned E-rank. How did you let that happen?”

[Akaso No.21618168]

>>21618153
events/scenes that need to happen, everything inbetween is natural and emergent from the narrative up to that point and world+character logic

having become used to that method, starting a new story has been like pulling teeth

[Anonymous No.21618183]

>>21618153
events/scenes that need to happen, everything inbetween is natural and emergent from the narrative up to that point and world+character logic

having become used to that method, starting a new story has been like pulling teeth

[Anonymous No.21618184]

please help:
>>21618144

[Anonymous No.21618211]

>>21618184
I wonder if I was doing it right. She moaned some more. I gave her another thrust. It was as if everything was working out, or could it be a feint. My friend Robert told me.of women that would fake their yelps and moans to end it quickly. "Ohh God more please!" Those words fell on deaf ears. My hips kept pushing, but my mind kept thinking. Surely this is not what she wanted right? " Yea baby take the cock." I said. My voice sounded half hearted and half confused. This certainly was an awkward exchange. She replied " yea please harder more I'm gunna cum!". Cum? Yuck. I don't want splooge all over my sheets. Can I just pour it in her? She kept pushing her hips back into mine. I wonder.

[Anonymous No.21618215]

>>21618184
"...and Melissa-" Jack suddenly set his glass down on the table hard enough that the beer inside nearly sloshed over the lip. Andrew's jaw snapped shut, and he drew together in his seat. "A-and M-Melissa was there too."

Is how I'd write something like that. Jack is surly or aggressive, and Andrew is meek.

[Anonymous No.21618219]

>>21618211
>>21618215
god bless

[Anonymous No.21618254]

>>21618183
I just write historical fiction because the world has already been created for me

[Anonymous No.21618257]

>>21618148
Just need... an idea...

[Anonymous No.21618272]

>>21618148
>thread theme
OP is a faggot

[Anonymous No.21618279]

>>21618257
Go outside.

[Anonymous No.21618287]

>>21618279
I go outside on Lindy walks every 45 minutes

[Anonymous No.21618294]

Some art I commissioned fort the second book of Retribution Engine's sequel series, Sturmblitz Kunst; armor used by the main character's protegé. It hasn't appeared in the story and will not do so for about a month.

1/2

[Anonymous No.21618297]

>>21618294
This looks some of the most try hard edgy crap to come out of rob liefields ass since the 90's

[Anonymous No.21618301]

>>21618294

2/2

[Anonymous No.21618310]

How did I become so incappable of producing even the simplest of sentences? It all feels like the work of a 6th grader. I should of tried something visual instead.

[Anonymous No.21618312]

>>21618297
>lithe grinning prettyboy
>smooth armor without any spikes
>liefeld
I take no issue with you not liking my design but at least shit on it in a way that makes sense

[Anonymous No.21618330]

Show don’t tell.
No head hopping.

[Anonymous No.21618341]

>>21618153
I don’t like to outline? Because, like, it ruins the spontaneity of the act of creation and if I’m not enjoying it then the reader won’t, you know? I think it’s best to just, like, right and figure out where it’s going as you go?

[Anonymous No.21618342]

>>21618294
>>21618301
Looks ok for modern genre fiction. Perhaps a little too generic. Not familiar with your books. Is it like anime?

[Anonymous No.21618348]

>>21618330
How do I avoid the feeling of headhopping if I write the narrative like thoughts of the protagonist and his perception of the other's intentions?

[Anonymous No.21618349]

>>21618301
Fine fine. Out of Biowares ass.

[Anonymous No.21618354]

Would it make sense for a military to execute for insubordination

[Anonymous No.21618360]

>>21618310
>work of a 6th grader
>incappable
>should of tried
I think I see the problem.

[Anonymous No.21618365]

>>21618354
It seems like you wouldn't want to piss off a bunch of armed subordinates, but what do I know.

[Anonymous No.21618366]

>>21618354
Yes. It's always annoying when a supposedly tyranical military court doesn't mandate bullet to the head in fiction. "Oh yeah, you got scared, tried to run away and crashed a couple of tanks on your way while we're fighting to the last man against hordes of monsters? Alright, dishonoranle discharge."

[Anonymous No.21618372]

>>21618330
https://pastebin.com/raw/upTxzqs0

[Anonymous No.21618379]

>>21618342

I don't really watch anime but I'm willing to bet my writing would be considered "anime writing" to some degree, at bare minimum in how I handle my magic system and combat sequences.

>>21618349

...Why Bioware?
Unless you're really stretching for the Collector Armor comparison, I guess.

[Anonymous No.21618413]

>>21618366
What you’re describing is more like desertion. I think in war time that’s always been kind of an execution-worthy offense. I mean something more along the lines of calling a superior officer a cock sucking faggot retard in front of everyone else.
Is that insubordination? Maybe just flagrant disrespect.

[Anonymous No.21618419]

>>21618379
Dragons age 2 . I could say WoW blizzard, but they get a pass for popularizing it and crappy graphics

[Anonymous No.21618423]

>>21618419
I still don't get what you mean. I've only played Origins.

[Anonymous No.21618626]

>>21618148
Decided to spellcheck and compile all my essays into one convenient epub

https://www.dropbox.com/s/8rkcnbop8gt8wti/Untitled%20document%20-%20J.%20Barger.epub?dl=0

[Anonymous No.21618660]

>>21618148

My printer broke, but I want to print a sloppy copy of my book. Anyone know an online printer that's cheap? The one I found wants 16€. I live in Germany.

[Anonymous No.21618680]

>>21618660
Just upload it on Amazon and have them print a proof copy.

[Anonymous No.21618686]

>>21618680
the book isn't even close to finished yet

[Anonymous No.21618687]

>>21618660
>>21618680
Seconded. They charged me 5€ for 390 pages.

[Anonymous No.21618695]

>>21618680
>>21618687
okay thank you, I'll check it out

[Anonymous No.21618756]

>>21618687
>>21618680
follow-up question, but how do I order a proof copy?

[Anonymous No.21618817]

Does anyone know a printer in the US that offers cheap pulpy newsprint?

[Anonymous No.21618844]

https://youtu.be/q5e8VJEOM8w

I started a shitty youtube channel. Wish me luck.

[Anonymous No.21618869]

>>21618844
Marvelous

[Anonymous No.21618979]

I'm worried people might think my story is racist.

[Anonymous No.21618994]

>>21618979
Don't. Just say that you support blm and your book critiques racism on twatter. They'll fall for it.

[Anonymous No.21619000]

post examples of literary genius.

i'm sceptical of reading and writing. i think its subservient to visual arts and music. we are post-literate as a species like we are post-bronze age imo.

[Anonymous No.21619004]

>>21618756
There's an option at the end to select it

[Anonymous No.21619040]

bet you niggas are over the moon about AI, now you can plug in your little mental fantasies and get a picture to jack off to hahahaha.

nah its based, i like writing myself i enjoy the works of Dostoyevsky and that's about it.
mostly because i get the feeling no author is really attuned to how i think.
you know?

i don't have that problem with music, but i have to know that a writer is not a retarded faggot simp/cuck before i expend my finite lifetime on his books.

Dostoyevsky is one of those who instantly struck me as being "in the know" as they say.
very few authors apart from that have given me this feel.

i've given many a chance and been dissapointed.
fuckin the stranger by camus? absolutely wasted my finite lifetime. fucking tepid weak ass storyline.

[Anonymous No.21619042]

>>21619004
at the end of what? I already signed up to KDP and there's nothing there

[Anonymous No.21619068]

>>21619042
Pricing at the bottom. Look for it

[Anonymous No.21619135]

>>21619040
>bet you niggas are over the moon about AI
I HATE THE ANTICHRIST.

[Anonymous No.21619172]

>>21618148
Please excuse the repost.

Lots of excitement in the /lit/ Top Ten this week, as John Jay Stancliff sets a new record for /wg/ publishing (previously held by James Krake's Infinite Money Glitch at #385,032). However, Mike Ma (hon.) continues to widen the gap for the #1 position. Krake was not able to retain his position in the top five, and Gardner has lost several slots in the top ten. RC Waldun (hon.) has not only surged back onto the rankings, but has taken a top five position. The Unreal Press Islamagood Bazaar continues to do a brisk trade and Victor Akaso retains his spot in the rankings. Ogden Nesmer finds himself clinging to the #10 position with I Pray to the Hungry God.

This week the /lit/ Top Ten takes a look at /wg/ history, uncovering some interesting trivia, including the bottom 5 ranked books currently on Amazon.

And finally, the Gossip Catalog makes special mention of Lewis Woolston, who despite having interacted with the editor of the /lit/ Top Ten on multiple occasions, still refers to me as "whoever makes these things."

[Anonymous No.21619267]

Reposting great comment from last thread, not mine but I endorse and came after many left

>>21618844
Cheese floss line killed me, hope you keep going.

>>21619172
I'll say it again, these just keep getting better. I don't want to jinx it but /wg/ has actually been on an upward trajectory recently.

[Anonymous No.21619297]

>>21619172
Woo hoo. I'm 100% on the bottom 5

[Anonymous No.21619319]

>>21619172
Are you a mindless spam bot or something?
"Re: Trailer Trash" is presently at #465,096.
"Son Of The Sun" is at #582,555.
Why are these being ignored?

[Anonymous No.21619515]

>>21619319
My book ranking (Trash) has remained in the low five digits, you may be looking at paperback sales instead of ebook for some reason.
#48,426 in Kindle Store

Getting my ass kicked on RR itself though, have dropped way down the rankings there.

[Anonymous No.21619529]

>>21618294
At this point you'd better off just using AI. This is the kinda crap it's good at.

[Anonymous No.21619531]

>>21619515
Then you should definitely be in the /lit/ top 10.
I'm wondering why whoever compiles that graphic is ignoring your work.

[Anonymous No.21619556]

>>21619531
probably the same reason the person who updates the pastebin ignores people

[Anonymous No.21619576]

>>21619531
Eh, no worries. I visit like once a month, I'm not exactly a regular.

[Anonymous No.21619705]

What's your process for making a character?

[Anonymous No.21619727]

>>21619705
Concept:
1. Steal from somewhere
2. Imagine your world as an rpg, the character you need is the quest giver npc
3. Think about the great personalities and gods in your setting, they should have diverse followers.
Conflict:
The story has some meaning, or it doesn't but you're trying to put it inside. Let the character portray a particular argument for it and an argument against it at the same time.
Backstory:
No idea, too hard.

[Anonymous No.21619748]

>>21619267
>I'll say it again, these just keep getting better.
Thanks, it's a lot of fun to make these. The challenge is to stop myself from overthinking it.
>>21619319
>"Re: Trailer Trash" is presently at #465,096
I'll be sure to include it next time, but Son of the Sun is included and is currently ranked at around 3.82 mil. My list of /wg/ fiction is also missing "a /wg/ novel that teaches you how to write" and "a gritty sci-fi" story that were both advertised on /lit/ in mid-2022, if someone could please help me out.
>>21619515
>you may be looking at paperback sales
Precisely.
>instead of ebook for some reason.
'For some reason' is that I only count paperback rankings. Why? Because it pleases me to do so.

[Anonymous No.21619818]

>>21619748
>'For some reason' is that I only count paperback rankings. Why? Because it pleases me to do so.
That's a weird choice for a group of self published amateur writers. Most of the sales will be ebooks or KU.

[Anonymous No.21619845]

>>21618153
A lot. It's the only way to write.

[Anonymous No.21619866]

>>21618153
enough. the big plot beats. maybe a quick blurb on a character. no more than that

[Anonymous No.21619871]

>>21619529
>use ai to remove the soul out of anything you make!

[Anonymous No.21619950]

>>21618153
Zero. I just shit something out and hope it works out in the end.

[Anonymous No.21619970]

>>21619871
Parochial types used to believe their soul could be stolen by getting their photograph taken.
You're not in good company.

[Anonymous No.21619973]

>>21619705
Just create the plot and the characters will come naturally.

[Anonymous No.21620003]

>>21619705
I just make them, anon.

[Anonymous No.21620079]

>>21619705
At its core, a character has a set of values that define its personality.
Those values lead to one or more priorities when confronted with a situation.
The difference in values and priorities creates conflict.
Personal growth happens when the character changes one or more of its values.

[Anonymous No.21620098]

what do you do if the ultimate value isn't the thing that changes? can't you have that? what if the value is the same but its not been properly integrated into the priority?

[Anonymous No.21620105]

>>21620098
What the fuck are you talking about?

[Anonymous No.21620131]

>>21620098
You've read books, you know how it feels to read stories. If something you're writing feels like it would intriguing and meaningful to read, then you're probably on the right path. If not, then rethink it. Guidelines about character development and all the rest of it are just guidelines. The last novel I read was James Salter's A Sport and a Pastime. It's now one of my favourite books, but there's zero conventional character development. If it works, it works.

[Anonymous No.21620157]

>>21620098
I never said your characters *had* to experience personal growth.

[Anonymous No.21620208]

does anyone have that website that tells you what author you write the most similarly to? It was shown to me here once upon a time.

[Anonymous No.21620230]

>>21620208
Post your work and I'll tell you

[Anonymous No.21620241]

>>21620230
you get out of context What I'm Currently Typing by Me
https://justpaste dot it/6urmf

[Anonymous No.21620248]

>>21619705
Generally I use very stock characters. They have clear cut personalities the reader can instantly grasp. As the story progresses, they acquire more quirks and history and more complex motivations. Then in editing a second draft, I go back to the early chapters and adjust things based on what the character evolved into.

[Anonymous No.21620298]

>>21620208
https://www.codingrobots.com/iwl/

[Anonymous No.21620314]

>>21620298
It says I write like DFW. That can't possibly be true.

[Anonymous No.21620357]

>>21620314
Me too. Do you also write postmodern nonsense?

[Anonymous No.21620369]

>>21620314
Shitty script. It said the same for me when I put one paragraph into it. It said Isaac Asimov when I put something about robots. Now without robots it says Neil Gaiman.

[Anonymous No.21620399]

>>21620357
Not at all.

[Anonymous No.21620400]

>>21619748
Yeah, seems genuinely retarded when you consider the overwhelming majority of sales will always be ebook and audio

[Anonymous No.21620410]

>>21620298
>dan brown
hmmm... i write very simplistically

[Anonymous No.21620445]

>>21619172
I hope one day I will outsell Mike Ma. He must sell 20 paperbacks a day. Quite impressive.

- John, author of Fedbook, which you should purchase because it’s very good

[Anonymous No.21620454]

>>21620298
>Anne Rice
never heard of this person before. maybe i'll pick up one of her books

[Anonymous No.21620474]

>>21620454
she wrote interview with the vampire

[Anonymous No.21620673]

>>21618183
Can you tell me more?

[Anonymous No.21620699]

>>21620410
And you shouldn't be ashamed of that, anon.

[Anonymous No.21620856]

>>21619172
You know, these sales numbers prove that this is a very small community, or that it is completely unhelpful at supporting, but I think it's just that there aren't many people here.

Would be nice to gather some constructive and productive feedback on some of these releases.

[Anonymous No.21620874]

>>21620856
I've bought several /lit/ books and left nice reviews of all of them, but I appear to be in the minority, and no one here has returned the favor.
so, yeah, completely unsupportive.

[Anonymous No.21620879]

>>21620874
I buy /lit/ books here and there too, sorry I haven't happened upon yours, I think you're proving my point that this is a tiny community.

[Anonymous No.21620887]

>>21620874
I buy only when I remember the story through excerpts. There was sometime last year where any shill just dumped their shit in here and fucked off. I didn't want to help those people.

[Anonymous No.21620891]

>>21620887
Most excerpts get ignored though.

[Anonymous No.21620906]

>>21620891
Most are just shitpost. If hell anon finished I would have bought it. I bought egregore too.

[Anonymous No.21620923]

>>21620906
Did you enjoy egregore? I felt that it didn't really maintain tension. The apparent plot didn't align with character behavior.

[Anonymous No.21620964]

I need your idea, anon. Short story. Few characters. Unusual, unexpected. I'll take care of it if you don't want it...

[Anonymous No.21620994]

>>21620964
An aspiring writer falls victim to agedonia, but he finds strength to go outside, touch grass and talk to real people for a change.

[Anonymous No.21621016]

>>21620994
Meta... I HATE meta!

[Anonymous No.21621023]

>>21620887
You can always read the "Look Inside" portions on Amazon.
No need to be so gatekeeping.
This thread is enough of a failed-crab bucket as it is.

[Anonymous No.21621028]

>>21620923
It started off well, but i felt it fell apart about 1/2 way through. Like you, the tension just didn't escalate well throughout. It's very well written though

[Anonymous No.21621032]

>>21620964
Nanotech augmentation keeps a person from dying, even though his flesh is rotting and he begs for the sweet release of death.

[Anonymous No.21621038]

>>21621028
Yeah, if you zoom in to any given paragraph, you're not going to complain about the prose but I think it's a good example of prioritizing "the prose" over the story

Better than most of the short stories in the unreal anthology though. I haven't exhaustively read them all, mind you

[Anonymous No.21621041]

>>21621023
It's not about the "look-inside". I liked helping those anons that shat out their first drafts on here, which we all laughed at, but they soldiered on eventually producing something. It may not be western canon or a classic, but it felt like I had a part in the creation of the product, hence I supported it.

But there were people, you never heard of suddenly said "Hey check out my book I wrote!" spammed the general, and did nothing but shill. I don't want to help those people. There was a book I missed out on. It was a fantasy book. I cant' tell you the name or author, but that's someone I wouldn't mind helping.

[Anonymous No.21621051]

>>21620964
Some guy told me “You’re welcome to dig your own grave”, and I said “I don’t own a fucking grave plot. Where the fuck would I be welcome to dig my own grave? This is America. Do you know how expensive a grave plot is?”

If you want an idea, just a dude being a criminal or something. I don't know. Books all have the same plot. Dude just goes out robbing and killing just saying "Boy I sure do love killing" and then he laughs at people and he is a mean guy, but he is happy because he is happy when other people suffer, not in some vengeant way, nothing bad every happened to him, he's not getting revenge, just in a sadistic way, he doesn't like how people discriminate between life and death, between suffering and non-suffering, and he's fighting discrimination by reminding people they are exactly the same things. Then he gets acquitted because there's no difference between being alive and dead, so in court. He also loves a dog and has sex with the dog, and the dog understands him and encourages him in a very loving and understanding manner. Just a regular type dog, but a good looking one.

[Anonymous No.21621055]

Beginning a sentence is the hardest part. It's too easy and almost theoretically possible to start every sentence with maybe 5 different words. "There is", "The", "A", "It's" "It is" , "This" etc. Mechanical, boilerplate prose then results with certitude. Generally you should always initiate a sentence with a strong word and end it boldly. Strive to avoid "function words" such as "if , and, but" and instead rely on content words such as nouns and verbs.

[Anonymous No.21621091]

>>21621041
I definitly feel that to some extent. Like I'm convinced the Xenos Depths guy hasn't been back here since he shilled. I've been trying to draw him out for months to no success.

However, I don't really post excerpts (and when I do, I seem to get ignored like earlier in this thread) but I do exist here. Same goes for F Gardner. He doesn't share any of his draft work before he puts it on Amazon

[Anonymous No.21621242]

>>21620874
Which is your book Anon?

[Anonymous No.21621298]

>>21621041
>There was a book I missed out on. It was a fantasy book.
The only one I can think of that matches that description is "Son Of The Sun".
I read and reviewed that, but big surprise, he didn't return the favor.
I still thought it was good.

[Anonymous No.21621305]

>>21621298
It was a green one with a tree cover. That's all I can remember. I dont' think he finished it yet though. I also want the Chicken Chinaman story.

[Anonymous No.21621356]

>put off story I wanted to write
>other stories start morphing to take on traits of this unfinished story
What do?

[Anonymous No.21621378]

>>21621356
Grind out the original. Or incorporate the new ideas into original story. That's what I did

[Anonymous No.21621397]

“I would never marry dasha”, my latest incelcore poem

oh i have a hole for genitalia, dont you wanna give me a million dollars?
if mgtow makes your heart cry
maybe your heart is weak for this life, and you should just die

my heart is strong like that of an ox
though it no longer longs for the box
pumps testosterone from my balding head to my smelly socks
my mission is god given
and it is not my cocks

[Anonymous No.21621409]

I started a story today. I suppose it's my new project. It started as a outline for a prompt to throw into chatgpt with little to no thought, but then everything began to pour out of my head automatically and I soon forgot all about chatgpt.

I sat here at my desk for six hours straight writing very rough drafts for the first two chapter and outlines for chapters three, four, and five. I stopped outlining at a point where the characters can start living in their own way, with little influence from my self.

I have four characters who feel more alive than any other characters I have written in the past. I am not delusional and starting to think that what I worked on today is the beginning of a masterpiece, but I'm proud of myself bros.

Taking my prescribed adderall after a break from it is no joke.

[Anonymous No.21621412]

>>21620298
>L. Frank Baum

[Anonymous No.21621426]

>>21621397
enjoyed

[Anonymous No.21621456]

>>21621378
How do I grind out the original?

[Anonymous No.21621463]

>>21621456
Sit and write it. Even if it is one sentence at a time

[Anonymous No.21621466]

>>21621456
Think about it before you sleep. Sit staring at the text on your screen teying to write more chapters you will eventually throw out. Remake all the character profiles and add more.

[Anonymous No.21621551]

>>21621356
Write what you want to write.
Write what your muse is telling you to write.
Doing otherwise is, to me, baffling.
Some time ago, I had a week's vacation that I planned to dedicate to writing my most recent novel, but my muse spent 3 days writing a 120-page screenplay that I knew would go nowhere. But I wrote it anyway.
And I still managed to crank out nearly 40k words in the rest of that week.
The only thing you should be writing, at any moment, is what you feel like writing.
Don't get in the way of your muse.

[Anonymous No.21621606]

>>21618153
A few sentences on how I want the chapter to go. I've been getting into writing smut lately so it's pretty episodic.
>>21618354
Yeah, they do it all the time.

>>21618979
What's making you think that?

Does anyone know how to work up the nerve to post a story on any porn site? My fetish is sort of niche so I'm trying to be the change I want to see in the world by making more. But I'm scared of getting doxxed

[Anonymous No.21621618]

How do I improve prose?

[Anonymous No.21621635]

>>21621618
They say you write, rewrite and acquire a feeling for better prose.

[Anonymous No.21621797]

https://pastebin.com/x4uC1ZHe

the first chapter of my medieval fantasy novel.
rate me senpai

[Anonymous No.21621980]

You know what I like to do?
Take stock anime tropes and do them in ways that actually make them good.
>The powerup and stuff
Our heroine actually has all of her powers right from the start. Problem is that she has absolutely no clue how to use them at all or even if some of them exist. So her getting stronger isn’t done through physical training or emotional shit, but by wisdom and experience as she slowly figures it out. For example, she discovers her ability to shoot beams from her hands by complete accident in a moment of desperation, and so she has to retrace her steps from that moment and think about what she did that caused that
>The power of friendship
I hate how this shit is done most of the time. So I decide to fix it by having it be more about trust and the bond that she’s built creating tangible benefits outside of emotional support. For example, when she’s incapacitated against a particularly dangerous foe, the friends and allies she has made decide to step in for her. Through their peerless teamwork and coordination, they’re able to overcome what she couldn’t alone.
And so on and so forth

[Anonymous No.21621988]

>>21620298
chapter 1
>neil gaiman
chapter 2
>arthur clarke
chapter 3
>l. frank baum
chapter 4
>james fenimore cooper
chapter 5
>leo tolstoy
what in the fuck man

[Anonymous No.21622112]

What do you think about this abrupt change in style between the two sections, does it work? Also general thoughts

On gaymaxxing: The traditional and the radical

a classically constructed ballroom, walls and ceiling dressed in meticulously decorated paneling
would humiliate any modernist designer, had such creatures a sense of shame
a balding witness to the collapse of western civilisation opens the front door
to the brief turning of a handful of heads, that reveal no emotion
he is pleased to see a favourable ratio at this blessed gathering
figures about 3 filipinas, or whichever budget asian country we’re in, per wrinkled coomer
oh how angry the western whore must be
but thank god for the yellow country, where submission is not a lost art
thank god for poverty
the one knows his perverted button, to dance on the western whores grave
flaunting her concave behind
not a beauty, but she sure smells sexy, like desperation
through her squinty eyes it’s hard to tell if there’s anything in their depth
probably not
either way it makes no difference

a younger man back home sings in the shower, filled with glee
“oh the western whore, the western whore, what a whorish western bore”
get the day started right, work up a smile to make the western whore cry
so fun is his first guy, cute and adoring, happily he’ll suck him dry
all a man could need, how great the wisdom of the based greek
so rich is the sight of his boys blue eyes
that for a moment, a dick can be absolved from his mind
a hole that works more or less fine, for such a boy a small compromise
now this is love
want’s to buy him roses because he knows it’s not required
sing some more as he skips to the store
“oh western whore, oh western whore, this femboypilled warrior needs you no more”
come night when they lie in bed, adoring boy stroking the hair on his chest
he stares out the window as he comes up with new rhymes to convince himself

[Anonymous No.21622130]

>>21621988
computers are stupid. they're very fast at performing calculations, but there's really nothing behind it.

[Anonymous No.21622144]

>>21621980
Admirable technique. But you could be more provocative. Get the real bad anime cliches. Misplaced rape scenes, women feeling love at the first sight and collapsing from emotion in front of the protagonist, the spunky mc messing with the isekai goddess, enslaved elven children...

[Anonymous No.21622249]

would you root for a slut protagonist?

I'm gonna write this anyway, but just curious

[Anonymous No.21622253]

>>21622249
Not really. Sluts aren't likable.

[Anonymous No.21622329]

>>21622249
Sure, if it's done well. This applies to everything.
But there are always people who won't like X character regardless of anything else because of their own biases/prejudices.

[Anonymous No.21622336]

>>21618153
Outline?

[Anonymous No.21622341]

>>21618257
A career oriented buisness woman who works for a large candle company travels to rural scotland in search of new smells where she meets a lonely, rugged candlemaker who reminds her of the simple and romantic pleasures of life

[Anonymous No.21622351]

>>21619705
Virtue and vice. Give them something that makes them admirable, like stregnth of characters or loyalty, balance it with something that makes them unlikeable, like short temperament or decietfulness. Add or subtract characteristics until you achieve the proper balance you want. Don't make anyone too likeable or too unlikable because that's boring

[Anonymous No.21622359]

>>21621618
You don't. It's all downhill from here anon

[Anonymous No.21622434]

>>21622341
Do you perhaps write screenplays for romantic comedies?

[Anonymous No.21622530]

>>21621797
Too abbreviated. Reads like a summary of a story instead of a story.

[Anonymous No.21622996]

>>21618148
I’m thinking that my system of elemental magic would have mages be able to manipulate higher forces, like Time and Space, etc., through the elements at arch-mage levels of power and skill, but I’m having trouble coming up with ideas. A few are pretty easy to come up with, like using Ice to “freeze”/slow down Time, but the rest I’m not having much luck with, besides copying what picture related can do with Fire. Does anyone here have any suggestions on what I can do in this regard?

[Anonymous No.21623038]

>>21622996
Yea go play final fantasy

[Anonymous No.21623044]

>>21621797
Yo'ken does X

[Anonymous No.21623057]

>>21620298
Individual parts mostly say I write like Stephen King, but the whole chapter apparently reads like William Gibson. I've never read anything by either. Is this a good thing?

[Anonymous No.21623077]

>>21620298
>Margaret Atwood
>Arthud Conan Doyle
>DFW
>HP Lovecraft
>All from excerpts of the same manuscript

shitass program

[Anonymous No.21623079]

>>21622249
If she's more than just a slut, sure

[Anonymous No.21623086]

>>21622249
I fell in love with a man-whore character. Kolya, my love, I'll never forget you...

[Anonymous No.21623099]

>>21621797
Agree with >>21622530

Read up on filtering too. But mainly needs to be more experiential - watch the ShaelinWrites YouTube video on specificity and sprinkle in a heavy dose of that in editing.

For example instead of "Yo'ken drew back his bowstring until the taut string itched as his cheek. The blurred arrowhead hovered before him, pointed directly at the deer's heart.

Something tactile/sensory (experiential) and a few hyper specific details for readers to picture.

[Anonymous No.21623107]

>>21623099
Sorry ducked up explanation - mean use like that example rather than "Yo'ken drew back his bowstring, aiming for a clean shot."

[Anonymous No.21623149]

Going to try and make this a short novella. What's a good lie my main character can come up with to try and seem like the other guy isn't dead after only he gets back from the woods until the girl eventually realizes mc killed him

>>21620298

I got David Foster Wallace

[Anonymous No.21623302]

>>21623149
Oh gods, this abominable language. Edit first, please.

[Anonymous No.21623397]

>>21622530
>>21623099

Thank you
>>21623044
Are you concerned with his activity level or the amount of social interaction?

[Anonymous No.21623467]

>>21620298
>Stephenie Meyer
>Anne Rice
>Vladimir Nabokov

oof

[Anonymous No.21623531]

>>21623397
The problem is that nearly every sentence starts with yo'ken or he. There has to be some differentiation

[Anonymous No.21623607]

>>21623149
There's no style, no art within your prose. This is how I shit out a paragraph to get the events down before I even start "writing" it. Needs a lot more work anon, but good on you for posting it. Critique is what you need. If you need specific advice, ask.

[Anonymous No.21623660]

Tooky's Mag is proud to present "The Sultan of Sydney University" from /lit/'s very own Lewis Woolston. Big shout out to Lewis for the great reading and thank you to those who followed last time.

Sooooobscribe for all future work: https://tookys.substack.com/p/the-sultan-of-sydney-university

The pieces that get readings also shared: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlNtSjRGMmU

[Anonymous No.21623683]

>>21623531
I agree I need variety. I knew that was going to be an issue for this section at least anyway in that he's the only person available to speak of, figuratively and literally. My intent for the first section is to introduce the hook (why is everyone crispy) and set his personality rather than a physical description. I was intentionally vague in his looks for the moment to try and set up that it's not about him but the group as a whole and his looks will come later when he is amongst people to see him be described too. I wanted to avoid describing Conan the barbarian muscle-bound leather underwear strong man thing right out of the gate and make it about his deep-seated obligation to do what's right to a fault.

[Anonymous No.21623766]

>>21618148
miniMAG Issue31
a weekly /lit/ magazine
submissions open for april-may issues
send poetry/shorts stories/non-fic/ art to:
[e-mail]
check out older issues at:
minimag.space

[Anonymous No.21623767]

>>21623766
>>21618211
do a whole 1-2k word story

[Anonymous No.21623769]

>>21623767
>>21623660
hype

[Anonymous No.21623771]

>>21623769

[Anonymous No.21623772]

>>21623771
>>21618372
so you’re in third person narration here and start from Rosa’s point of view. The hard switch to John’s point of view actually makes it feel weird. You should try sticking to one side or the other. possibly write it twice, once from each point of view

[Anonymous No.21623774]

>>21623772

[Anonymous No.21623779]

>>21623774
>>21618626
broken link

[Anonymous No.21623781]

>>21623779

[Anonymous No.21623785]

>>21623149
You've got too many irrelevant details in there and you're over explaining everything. You're using very direct language too. I can't write very well but this would've been how I'd have put it down for the first draft, though I'd never have written it in first person.
As for your question, why is the protagonist saying that Steve isn't dead?
He should be pretending that he was killed by someone/something other than himself. Then, as he and Hanako travel around trying to survive, and the protagonist (not "MC") has seemingly gotten what he wanted, Hanako can slowly come to realise that the protagonist has murdered Steve because
>of the protagonist's guilt (if he's that way inclined)
>the lengths the protagonist will go to get what he wants, now he's in charge of the group
Maybe Hanako notices the protagonist's inclination towards violence or that he can't deal with losing. I like the idea that after Steve's death they bond and travel around together for a while, but eventually meet and join up with another group. The protagonist is perhaps insecure around the young, athletic men in the new group who remind him of Steve, yet he has to reluctantly join them because his love for Hanako overpowers his selfish nature, whcih would be to keep her all to himself, even though it reduces their chances of survival. Then, when he feels the most threatened (he and Hanako have an arguement or something) he schemes once again to commit murder because he thinks *insert character* is going to steal her away from him. Hanako finds out and, realising his capacity for murder, puts it together, seeing that he's trying to kill to get her to himself, just like he did at the start.

And one thing I wanted to mention, "Hanako" and "Steve" aren't names which sound like they belong in the same setting. What's the protagonist called?

[Anonymous No.21623791]

>>21623781
>>21620241
is this sonic fanfic?
>>21622112
the shift works

[Anonymous No.21623793]

>>21623791

[Anonymous No.21623800]

>>21623793
>>21623149
reads like an outline, try and find a reason that the reader should root for your mc rather than steve. on the first readthrough all I could think was “I hope steve kills this fucker”

[Anonymous No.21623807]

>>21623800
send submissions to:
[e-mail]
read full issues at:
minimag.space

[Anonymous No.21623819]

Fuck. I'm really trying to give a character a meaningful name based on an old language, but it always sounds too similar to some internet schizo kiwifarms patient's nickname.

[Anonymous No.21623830]

>>21619172
Maybe my life is rather sad but i've started looking forward to seeing these posts

[Anonymous No.21623847]

>>21623660
Kino all the way

[Anonymous No.21623854]

>>21622434
No

[Anonymous No.21623860]

>>21618294
Last commission I got done was this.

[Anonymous No.21623939]

I keep a Google doc with notes/ideas/edits I want to add or make. Throughout the day, if I think of something, I jot it down before I forget. It's around 10 pages at the moment.

[Anonymous No.21624081]

Finally i figured out ten concepts to pack into my short novel. It's going to be so great to represent the true meaning of something worthy of a philosophical tractate in a simple story. I only need to learn how to write now.

[Anonymous No.21624091]

>>21623607

I'm trying to write for the fun of it not attempting to do the next Infinite Jest, or 2666.

>>21623800
>>21623785

My main character is intentionally left nameless. He's pretty much what you'd imagine a fat and ugly bastard from a hentai would be like. You're pretty much meant to despise the main character and wish something bad would happen to him but he somehow winds up winning uninetionally at every oppurtunity through sheer luck with his own resourcefulness.

[Anonymous No.21624216]

My professor said I did a "good job" on the rough draft of my essay.

[Anonymous No.21624241]

>>21624091
If you're being this defensive and not taking the criticism, why did you post an excerpt here?

[Anonymous No.21624298]

>>21623791
No? But I do write those.

[Anonymous No.21624342]

How much should I charge for my book on Amazon? $15 too much?

[Anonymous No.21624359]

>>21623149
Your sentences need to be broken up, condensed, and streamlined.
>A mugger had tried to kill me point blank with a shotgun and nearly did but I had managed to drive an axe into his skull as if someone else was controlling my body on autopilot mode before he could get a chance to pull the trigger.
A man with a shotgun tried to mug me, but I drove an axe into his skull before he could pull the trigger.

'Someone else controlling my body on autopilot' is obviously redundant and saying the same thing twice. Stuff like 'managed to' 'put in a position' 'become a place' 'decided to' should be red flags to you when editing. Those should be replaced with more direct verbs.

Think about tense and aspect. You have a lot of continuous and past perfect sprinkled in. Was verbing and had verbed. It's best to stick to past tense and only use those consciously when necessary. Otherwise it feels like you're yo-yoing through time.

[Anonymous No.21624370]

>>21624091
>uninetionally
>oppurtunity
Jesus Christ

[Anonymous No.21624372]

>>21623860
Artists like this are the reason why AI can't do hands.

[Anonymous No.21624377]

>>21624342
How long is it?

[Anonymous No.21624457]

>>21624377
250 pages or so

[Anonymous No.21624510]

>>21623660
nag screen. couldn't read it. go kys

[Anonymous No.21624515]

If submitted five poems to about seven publishing journals, I had one poem accepted, do I have to withdrawal from everything now, or do I message them saying "this poem is no longer available"?

[Anonymous No.21624532]

>>21624515
Let them fight over it.

[Anonymous No.21624585]

>>21624515
withdraw everything and burn it, then laugh at them knowing theyll never sell it

[Anonymous No.21624719]

>>21624372
I don't follow.

[Anonymous No.21624767]

>>21624719
Lazy humans skip drawing hands. Feed human art to computer. Computer ends up retarded due to lack of training.

[Anonymous No.21624804]

>>21624767
Humans also suck at writing. If you feed an AI every novel ever written and then ask it to write one, you'll get a terrible novel.
>And people think chatGPT is going to replace authors

[Anonymous No.21624892]

>>21620298
>Stephenie Meyer

IT'S OVER

[Anonymous No.21624900]

>>21620298
>Ursula K. Le Guin
I don't know if its a good thing or not

[Anonymous No.21624977]

I just finished the second draft of my sci fi novel. Woo. It's probably too long to get published because for some reason literary agents are scared of anything over 100,000 words, but I'm happy.

Not sure what I'll do with it yet. I'll probably try and query, but in all likelihood I'll end up self publishing or just keeping for years like what happened to my last one.

[Anonymous No.21624982]

>>21624767
I think there's going to be a more "contained" artist drawing. A group of artists draw like 1000 characters, then the AI only draws from that specific pool. that'll solve a lot of things

[Anonymous No.21624991]

>>21624892
>Past new draft excerpt.
>Leo Tolstoy

Lmao, this app.

[Anonymous No.21625052]

>>21624991
I’ve gotten HP Lovecraft with one excerpt, then Nbokov with the same excerpt after editing.

[Anonymous No.21625105]

>>21622249
I wrote this novel about a man's life, told trough his many relationshios with many women. But I then realized it that no man would read such thing, so I switched the characters gender, to appeal to women readers.

[Anonymous No.21625113]

>>21623149
>me
>Steve
>the person I would kill and
>Hanako
Kek, holy shit.

[Anonymous No.21625185]

you people have no chance.

[Anonymous No.21625207]

Thank you, and I should add that we are open to submissions- flash fiction, short, non-fic - just about anything relevant to our topic of male life post 2008: https://forms.gle/yTxqpqnSkY2pfC6W7

>>21624510
Try clicking "No Thanks" or the "X". Message me if you need instructions on shutting off your computer :-)

>>21624977
Congratulations! I'm 500 words short of finishing a 100k word manuscript and couldn't imagine doubling down for a second half.

What is your topic and writing process like to get all that down?

[Anonymous No.21625249]

>>21625207
>What is your topic and writing process like to get all that down?
It's all about commitment, anon.
I sit down every day and write 2000 minimum words. Sometimes I go way over that, but I always strive for 2000 words of reasonable quality.
Of course, realistically, sometimes I don't reach it. There's the odd day where I only get 1000 words, or even don't get any words at all, but those are rare and I don't beat myself up about them.
I just think of it mathematically. At 2000 words a day, I can finish a 100,000 word first draft in 50 days, and likely sooner.
I try not to obsess over that pace, but it's always in my mind. At the end of the day, we have limited time on this earth, and if I really want to be a writer then I need to actually write.
I see people on twitter and shit proud of the fact it's taken them 10 years to write 50,000 words and it's just like bruh you're wasting so much time.
Also, 2000 words a day isn't really that much when you get used to it. Authors like Sanderson and King do more than that (and I try to as well).

[Anonymous No.21625254]

>>21620298
Got J.D Sallinger from a random story in first person about a racist hitman who killed a heroin Mexican thief, who works for this Frenchman, and then I got Arthur C. Clarke, after entering a random space horror story about Extra-Saturnial Magick.
Both huge faggots.

[Anonymous No.21625266]

>>21620298
>Neil Gaiman
Is this bad?

[Anonymous No.21625272]

>>21625207
What is the deadline for submission? What is Tooky's Mag? I usually don't browse /lit/ that much.

[Anonymous No.21625303]

Bump

[Anonymous No.21625322]

>>21625185
>non-binary and genderfluid heroine
>not like the other girls, but has a pussy and a nice set of tits
>and is also tough and can hang with the guys. grrrrr
may as well hang up my scribbler. I know when I've been bested

[Anonymous No.21625378]

>>21625272
Bump

[Anonymous No.21625422]

>>21625185
It gets better.

>Beauty's Beasts is a why choose Beauty and the Beast retelling meets the four horsemen of the apocalypse. Here is a list of content so far in this story, and this isn't even the full list yet:
>misogyny, transphobia, homophobia, deadnaming, animal death (stillborn), assault, human sacrifice, religious trauma, strong religious themes, chasing, gore, violence, monster genitalia, biting, mating, on page grand mal seizure, dirty talk, exhibitionism, begging, oral sex, rimming, bondage, primal play, anal sex, group sex, double penetration, PTSD, depression, self-degradation, self-sacrifice, live animal birth, & resurrection.

[Anonymous No.21625430]

>>21625185
I want to read it

[Anonymous No.21625511]

>>21625249
Respect. That is a remarkable level of commitment though. I've found a similar system works for me although not quite as prolific - get a scene out a day (usually at least 500 words) and a chapter or short story done a week. Something about those more qualitative goals really works for me but everyone has to feel out there system but ultimately I agree with your point that it comes down to commitment on a daily/near daily basis at the end of the day. Hope you shill your stuff here when it's ready.

>>21625272
No deadline now just building a backlog and very appreciative of anyone interested, check out the "About" section on the page as well but were just a fortnightly short fiction/non-fiction outfit interested in topics relevant to our current cultural moment that aren't just tirades. We emphasise unique art for each post, sometimes audio reading by author or an AI, and pieces written from a cultured chud perspective.

Feel free to email me stories, ideas, or just questions at [e-mail] or just shout out to me here as I'm often lurking/critiquing as anon

[Anonymous No.21625562]

>that moment when you discover you're an absolute shit writer because ai can write better than you
i mean, i kind of knew i wasn't great to begin with but getting schooled that badly is not a great feeling

[Anonymous No.21625577]

>don't want to write because my paranoid delusions make me feel like there is a rat installed on my computer and someone out there is judging my writing process
i should learn to draw instead

[Anonymous No.21625683]

>>21625577
>someone is judging me!
>oh no I'm paralyzed!
get over yourself dumbfuck. write some smut to cauterize those feelings out of you

[Anonymous No.21625754]

>>21620298
Who the fuck is "James Joyce"?

[Anonymous No.21625831]

>>21625754
He's a major faggot that writes crappy books like "Ulysses" and "Finnegan's Wake".

[Anonymous No.21625833]

>>21625831
Wow. He's literally me.

[Anonymous No.21625866]

>>21620298
>>21625754
I'm getting everything from Orwell to Joyce to Adams to Asimov to Carroll to DFW etc. depending on the chapter/passage.
Either this shit is broken or I have schizophrenia.
Well I do have schizophrenia, but I still think it's broken.

[Anonymous No.21625873]

>>21620298
>https://www.codingrobots.com/iwl/
gave me Kurt Vonnegut for this

[Anonymous No.21625885]

>>21625866
>da computer keeps spitting out different outputs with different inputs
>maybe the problem is me
maybe

[Anonymous No.21625904]

>>21625885
Ohhhhhhh
I thought someone was reading it then emailing me their thoughts
My bad

[Anonymous No.21625915]

>>21625866
Gave me Arthur Conan Doyle for this, it just seems like some random name drop without any explanation or meaning. I wouldn't put any faith in it. I don't remember Doyle writing about industrializing child production, but maybe I never read that Holmes book. I guess maybe the medical terms attached Doyle to the work since he was a physician, but I doubt it.

[Anonymous No.21625931]

>>21625915
>it just seems like some random name drop without any explanation or meaning
Yeah, I'd be curious to know what they're basing it on; it just seems random.
The only utility seems to be buzzfeed-tier "I'm just like Joey from Friends!" ego stroking.

[Anonymous No.21625940]

Why do I always end up getting frustrated and angry with a core plot point of my first draft, causing me to give up on it for years and brood about it?

[Anonymous No.21626030]

As writers, how do you feel about other writers being influenced by their fandom? Like, say two characters that were never meant to be romantic, end up being so because fans seemed to really want it. Do you think it’s a bad thing for writers to change their vision, if they believe it to be a way of retaining reader interest? I suppose the easy answer is ‘it depends on what’s being changed’, but I’m not sure if any of you have a strong opinion on this subject.

[Anonymous No.21626041]

>>21625422
>Trigger warning: monster genitalia

[Anonymous No.21626045]

>>21626030
>I suppose the easy answer is ‘it depends on what’s being changed’
I would say it depends on why it's being changed. If the author genuinely agrees that it's a good idea - then sure - it can turn out well; but if he's just caving to audience demands then it's hacky pandering and gay.

[Anonymous No.21626046]

>>21625940
because you're not Alpha.

[Anonymous No.21626052]

>>21625422
>>21626041
>>21625185
>>21625249
Laugh all you want, but I read some of his other books in the Amazon free preview, and his prose is 1000x better than the shit posted on here

[Anonymous No.21626101]

>>21626052
>but I read some of his other books in the Amazon free preview, and his prose is 1000x better than the shit posted on here
>in the Amazon free preview, and his prose is 1000x better
>his prose
>his
um, sweaty, that's a bit presumptuous to misgender them, don't you think?

[Anonymous No.21626121]

>>21625185
>>21625422
Some women didn't get hit enough, huh?

[Anonymous No.21626152]

>>21626101
Much apologies for misgendering, but the point still stands.

[Anonymous No.21626173]

>>21626152
nah, it doesn't. we don't even know who that faggot is

[Anonymous No.21626255]

>>21626046
What do I do then? Play it out and then restart the draft with a plot point I prefer?

[Anonymous No.21626271]

>>21625940
do you have an example?
I think its best to not look for perfection and to get rid of whatever annoys you the most, the plot point or the the thing that conflicts with it.

[Anonymous No.21626274]

I have around 10k words of a novel before my writing pace turns glacial and I have to start killing chickens to get ideas
anyone know a way to avoid this?

[Anonymous No.21626318]

>New chapter due to release soon
>Still too many followers
>Hopefully this one will be the one to weed out any snowflakes
I just want to write with no pressure god dammit!

[Anonymous No.21626457]

>>21626271
It's a core plot point that drives the MC's actions. If I change this to what I prefer I'd need to rewrite everything to the point of an alternative story.

[Anonymous No.21626461]

>>21626318
Feature a love interest who is an elementary school student.

[Anonymous No.21626466]

>>21626457
okay then whats wrong with it?

[Anonymous No.21626470]

How do you overcome and conquer the delusions of grandure when you're just too damn smart and already have ideas of creating masterpieces with the creative effort you can hardly handle and technical achievements you will spend years to reach? I have a story I'm writing, but I'm not sure I want to keep it as prose. I'm not sure it can stand on its own without visuals and music. I can make those. I also have AI now, I actually can write my own models for the work flow that I need. It will possibly take years and quite a bit of money. I think I just need to write it and get critiqued to oblivion to ruin those fantasies.

[Anonymous No.21626476]

>>21626461
Only if she's above twelve and love interest includes marriage or people like me are going to get filtered too.

[Anonymous No.21626507]

>>21626466
>i-i can't tell you that because if i do you'll steal the idea out of my drawer. and then people will SEE it and know what an absolute failure i am. i'm just gonna dance around saying anything concrete because i just want a pity party not actual help with my issue

[Anonymous No.21626514]

>>21626507
I think it would be cringe but I've had too many examples of people stealing my shit and not giving credit to ever think negatively of someone who is hesitant to share

[Anonymous No.21626522]

>>21626470
being a legend in your own mind only lasts until the moment you share your work with the world for critique. then it gets picked apart, but that's part of the process of making it better. when that happens you can act like a bitch or you can learn a lesson from your lumps

[Anonymous No.21626524]

>>21626466
It's nothing special, it's a plot point that I half assed and it doesn't work nearly as well as I hoped it would. The MC is supposed to be this long lost princess but then I inserted this character who knows about her and knows everything but doesn't do anything about it so the story meanders on and on and I lose the motivation to either carry on or reboot it.
>>21626507
Whomst art thou quoting?

[Anonymous No.21626528]

>>21626476
>above twelve
She's a middle school student at 12. 11 is the cutoff. Stop being a pussy and have cunny.

[Anonymous No.21626529]

I like telling people my ideas when it comes to writing because it’s a win-win. Either I write it and get to enjoy the story, or the person writes it and I get to enjoy their story. Call me a creative cuck, if you wish to, but I’m the literary equivalent of a coomer.

[Anonymous No.21626530]

>>21626514
>but I've had too many examples of people stealing my shit and not giving credit
give an example :^)
I'm serious. like someone liked an idea and then acted on it? you snooze you lose[

[Anonymous No.21626535]

>>21626529
I don't take people's ideas, I take their scripts and their narratives and rewrite them in my style.

[Anonymous No.21626544]

>>21626530
less to do with writing and more to do with my job were I've contributed to doing something but then some guy takes the credit because he's one step above, or in projects were I contribute an idea (thats simple and anybody can do) but then some guy thinks he's the genius that came up with it and forgets about me in a heartbeat
writing wise though ideas are worthless but its also important to know that timing matters as much as execution so if some guy copy-pastes my idea and becomes huge right before I publish/post I would never be able to live with myself lol

[Anonymous No.21626545]

>>21626529
Typical westoid.

[Anonymous No.21626546]

>>21626524
>it's a plot point that I half assed
the princess part, or the character who knows her backstory not doing anything? because the princess part sounds like it should be integral to the plot and not just some idea you tossed in.
the other character not doing anything can be explained a hundred ways after the fact or have them do stuff offscreen

[Anonymous No.21626580]

>>21626524
>It's nothing special,
>it's a core plot point
Well it seems like it's an actual issue, especially if it made you abandon the project. Some easy fixes would be the character doesn't know absolutely everything about her - I mean, who'd know everything. Or the character merely suspects. Or the character is acting under someone else's orders. Or everything they do is very, very subtle.

[Anonymous No.21626756]

https://pastebin.com/sVBtcMQb

The faculty of a magical academy.

[Anonymous No.21626815]

Forgive your fellow man for being a godamn idiot here, but if I wanted to post my project to royal road for fun and giggles and just an ounce of happiness while intending to publish the thing once it's complete, that wouldn't really be the best idea, would it?
They check for that, right?
I just want to have fun with my project before it collects dust and aches as a completed thing with no one to see it. So it's either get a few online viewers or try and fish for publishing, with likely little success. And what of the Amazon route? Does it care if there's another copy on Royal Road or something?

[Anonymous No.21626821]

it's all I want to do, yet I haven't wanted to write for years, yet I've written for years and years and years

[Anonymous No.21626860]

>>21626815
>they check for that, right?
nope, that's total acceptable on RR. its also nice posting chapters and getting feedback and taking the time to go through multiple editing passes before publishing the final draft after RR

[Anonymous No.21626865]

>>21626860
no I mean, do publishers care, does amazon care
if I'm not understanding you correctly sorry, lack of sleep

[Anonymous No.21626869]

>>21626865
if you want to put it on kindle unlimited you need to take it down from RR when you do. regular kindle they don't care

[Anonymous No.21626872]

>>21625577
The idea that some poor schmuck has to sit there and go through all the deranged shit I look at and write actually gets me kind of hot. I control their little rat lives. The more they hate it, the hotter it is.

[Anonymous No.21626873]

>>21626869
I heard from someone on here that if you've ever had it on anywhere, RR, wattpad, whatever, that even deleting it won't save you from publisher's wandering eyes, but not sure if true

[Anonymous No.21626890]

>>21626873
>publisher
you're talking like random house or whoever? unless you hit it big as a self published novel they won't be interested. but if you do hit it big, as an example Coleen Hoover, they'll come crawling to you over broken glass

[Anonymous No.21626894]

>>21626890
yeah, any publishing house. I imagine they get picky over these kinds of things because of course they do.

[Anonymous No.21627071]

>>21626461
>>21626476
Already had a young attempted raping and i still have followers.
>Writing was never supposed to be this hard.

[Anonymous No.21627095]

>>21627071
>attempted
Coward. Your readers know you're a coward.

[Anonymous No.21627290]

When silence plods its quiet path
When all I knew is gone at last
When I’m forgetting how to breath
And cough into my tattered sleeve
Know that I knew all along
I waited for the silent song
I went with mercy, and with grace
From a long forgotten place
I learned so much and then forgot
My lessons end as they began
In first sucked breath I knew to breath
In last exhale I know to leave.

[Anonymous No.21627451]

>>21626756
There's far too much exposition. Even when the children were knocking on the teacher's door. An important scene shouldn't just have the students clanged on the door. Give me some feelings from aswtero.

Also change your MCs name. Aswtero is fucking terrible

[Anonymous No.21627508]

>>21618148
I wonder if the background things would fit in my ass

[Anonymous No.21628055]

>>21626580
I mean the idea itself isn't something I'm going to lose sleep over sharing, but yes I keep making these core plot points that I hate and require me to rewrite it from the start.

[Anonymous No.21628061]

>>21627071
>attempted
>raping
Two strikes anon. A vanilla loving romantic relationship between a girl and an adult male is the true kryptonite to these people.

[Anonymous No.21628081]

>>21626890
So if you want to get published t then don't post to RR or you can?
Sorry ESL.

[Anonymous No.21628138]

>>21628081
Right. If you want to try your luck at being trad published you cannot publish it somewhere else first. The exception is if it becomes a huge success, and then publishers will be calling you.

[Anonymous No.21628202]

>>21626815
Why can't you publish AND post it on Royal Road? Take a page from Re:Zero, Tappei has the WN on and updated continuously while the LN is ongoing. Stop copying these failed Western authors.

[Anonymous No.21628212]

>>21628202
The reason he can do that is he's a jap, and jap publishers are like that
Western publishers are retarded and desperately holding onto some misbegotten illusion of sanctity

[Anonymous No.21628228]

>>21628202
you misunderstand. not self pub, he wants to get published by a major trad publisher. a fool's endeavor in the year 2023, but that's his dream

Hey other anon, Branden Sanderson wrote like 10 books before getting trad published, even with his mormon connections. And that was like 20 years ago.

[Anonymous No.21628235]

>>21628202
>>21628212
Most people are posting for free on websites. Then publishers and movie people are looking. Agent query is a bad business model now.

[THREAD SUMMARY No.21628284]

>>21618148

This thread is about writing general and literature. Anonymous posters discuss topics such as design, plot, characters, and writing techniques. One poster expresses their dislike for a design, another poster explains how to avoid headhopping when writing the narrative, and another poster suggests taking stock anime tropes and doing them in ways that actually make them good. Another poster asks for a website that tells them what author they write the most similarly to. Another poster shares the first chapter of their medieval fantasy novel and asks for feedback. Another poster expresses their frustration with a core plot point of their first draft, and another poster asks for advice on how to feel about other writers being influenced by their fandom. Finally, another poster asks if it is okay to post their project to Royal Road for fun and giggles before publishing it.

- Show, don't tell when writing.

- Take stock of anime tropes and use them in ways that make them good.

- Consider the trust and bond between characters and how it can create tangible benefits.

- Rewrite and acquire a feeling for better prose.

- Consider the protagonist's inclination towards violence and how it can be used in the story.

- Use the deadline for submission to motivate yourself.

- Don't be defensive when receiving criticism.

- Computer ends up retarded due to lack of training.

- Authors like Sanderson and King do more than just write.

- Don't post your work to Royal Road if you intend to publish it.

[Anonymous No.21628488]

>>21628284
I much prefer this to what could've easily been a mass-reply post, nicely done anon.

[Anonymous No.21628503]

has anyone ever said
>go read a book
to you?

i always find it so funny when someone says that to me.

[Anonymous No.21628511]

>>21628503
why? Its a very reasonable request to make

[Anonymous No.21628520]

>>21618153

Synopsis, chapters, and a few sentences per chapter. Just to keep things organized and keep the bigger picture in mind.

I approach it like a craftsman, sitting down and knocking out each part until it's finished, then going back and refining it until it's ready.

Been writing for a living for only five years.

[Anonymous No.21628554]

The "blind leading the blind" problem is bigger in writing than any other medium. This is to say that you will learn more from the substance than the information. A good attitude and an eagerness for surprise and challenge will do you better than any tips, tricks, scripts, moves, etc. In terms of what you NEED to know, simply improve your vocabulary & grammar and always strive towards the active rather than the passive. Even then, one supposes there are times when passivity is vital to the writing's integrity.

[Anonymous No.21628563]

I want to throw together a quick poem for something, but I must have my metric foot be adhered to with autistic strictness. Do any of you lads know about any tools made for this purpose? I always end up just using an Excel spreadsheet where I put one syllable per cell on a line, all-capsing stressed ones, but it's kind of a pain in the ass and I imagine someone will have come up with a purpose-built application for this shit already.

>>21619950
based

[Anonymous No.21628582]

>>21628554
>"blind leading the blind"
>always strive towards the active rather than the passive

Case in fucking point kek

[Anonymous No.21628584]

>>21628554
>always strive towards the active rather than the passive
no I don't think I will

[Anonymous No.21628586]

>>21628503
No, likely because I tend to be the one who's read significantly more books than everyone else.

[Anonymous No.21628599]

>>21628511
It's an insult from a midwit who thinks that he's smart (read two books in college and got all the other knowledge he has from internet propaganda and TV shows).
>>21628503
Wouldn't really happen to me, everyone who sees me thinks I'm like 50 IQ points above them, I don't know if it's real or just some fucking power of convincing I have.

[Anonymous No.21628689]

Is it common to suck a lot at your first draft? I'm at the end of mine and it seems so bad. A lot of open things and incoherence here and there. I feel like giving up.

[Anonymous No.21628701]

>>21628689
>Is it common to suck a lot at your first draft?
Yes

[Anonymous No.21628702]

>>21628689
It's normal to have three drafts of the same novel, your first time is generally supposed to suck (if it doesn't then your awesome) the most important part is that you have a strong foundation underneath all the fragile words that you're going to alter on future passes. Is there something there? Do you believe beneath the bad first draft writing, is something promising? Then keep on drafting.

[Anonymous No.21628703]

>>21628284
>- Computer ends up retarded due to lack of training.
Except in this case, the ai is retarded from too much training.
>- Don't post your work to Royal Road if you intend to publish it.
A good example of how AI is retarded.

[Anonymous No.21628705]

>>21628689
Don't worry anon after you read my fantasy YA draft and you'll feel better about yourself!

[Anonymous No.21628716]

>>21628689
The biggest implicit lie ever told to this generation is that you will win in your first try (ie. with participation trophies, easy assignments, and hand holding through difficult ones) everything worth doing will involve failure, mediocrity, and ultimately success

If you can't stick it out through your first one then do another novel, but don't think you won't feel the same during the second one too

[Anonymous No.21628717]

>>21628702
>your first time is generally supposed to suck (if it doesn't then your awesome)
Or, you spent too much time on it. Even then, people who spend too much time refining each paragraph instead of continuing the move forward end up being boring and wordy anyway.

Best way to rough draft is get the scene clear in your head then tap into that stream of consciousness and write write write, imo.

[Anonymous No.21628741]

>>21628716
>>21628717
Over editing is a thing. I've wrote and rewrote sentences and after the 20th time, the first sentence ended up being the most stylish and best prose.

Reading aloud is necessary. Pretending to be a sage telling a story orally is sorely missing in many stories

[Anonymous No.21628753]

>>21628582
>always strive towards the active rather than the passive
It's an active imperative clause.

[Anonymous No.21628778]

How do I correctly write my coomer fantasy novel? I am too shy and autistic to show you guys anything

[Anonymous No.21628785]

>>21628778
post just one little snippet brother

[Anonymous No.21628801]

>>21628778
Feedback is a critical part of the process, but write to the point where you're comfotable with it before you post anything.

[Anonymous No.21628804]

>>21628778
Florid descriptions of elf girlballs

[Anonymous No.21628807]

>>21628778
You are anonymous, friend. Once you are ready, you have nothing to lose and only much to gain by posting.

[Anonymous No.21628846]

How would you recreate the feeling of seeing a beautiful woman in readers? Is it impossible? Am I looking to turn lead into gold?

[Anonymous No.21628859]

>>21628785
FAIR WARNING It's really fucking gay (seriously) and it sounds like trannyshit but I promise it's just because I love femboys and futas (and trannies) and not because I want it to be some super pozzed xe/xer fuck drumpfgh tranny politics circlejerk. I do not give a fuck about any of that and I am strictly in it because I'm a porn addict. That being said don't criticize the coomer writing too much, this is mostly for myself I just want it to read well and make sense.
With that said this one is about you (my trap self-insert) being sent over from your royal family in the Whitelands (north/winter) to the southern land of Avanziji'i (tropical, jungle) where you will also consort with royalty. Your purpose there is to basically be a nanny/aid for the new princess but along the way you get into all sorts of troubles. It sounds kind of light-hearted and sit-com-y but it's not supposed to. I have a list of a few special (mostly futa) characters.
There is also a ton of play around the gender stuff, again, not because I'm into any of the tranny shit but because it seems fitting for a medieval/fantasy setting to have "lore" around why certain women have penises and some don't. I'm really trying to flesh it out. I have a whole entire list of "rules" and special terminology around this concept I can throw into a pastebin maybe.
Anyway, I don't have much actual writing or layout for the plot other than a very vague idea. I do have some but I want to know whether this is retarded before I put all of my secret writings out there. If it's not really anyone's 'thing' I'm not gonna bother

[Anonymous No.21628860]

>>21628846
>seeing a beautiful woman in readers?
what?

[Anonymous No.21628866]

>>21628860
you know how you could make readers feel sad or happy? well how do I make readers feel the same way they feel in front of a beautiful woman?

[Anonymous No.21628872]

>>21628859
We're going to criticize your grammar and prose. Nobody gives a shit about futa cocks or werewolf knots or whatever sick shit you're into.

[Anonymous No.21628878]

>>21628859
I need 50,000 words and a copy in my hands by yesterday. But only if the futa dont have vaginas too because THAT is gay

[Anonymous No.21628904]

>>21628866
Oh, right. My brain malfunctioned.
To answer your question: I doubt it can be done. You could show characters having that feeling, and hope for an empathetic transfer. Honestly, you should read female romance books to see what tricks they use in making abusive billionaire boyfriends. It probably has more to do with personality than any description of appearance.

[Anonymous No.21628906]

>>21628753
Not a comment on the clause but on the idea. Passive voice is essential and should be used often. Been a bit since dusted off Pullum but I suppose it's necessary as people wash in and out of the general.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kcbHKbvwCnU

http://www.lel.ed.ac.uk/~gpullum/passive_loathing.pdf

[Anonymous No.21628952]

>>21628906
My theory is that the word 'be' is overworked in English. It's the verb for existing. It's a copula for joining a noun and adjective. (The dog is green) It marks the continuous aspect. (The dog is running.) It's used for passive constructions. (the man was bitten by the dog.) In the old days it even marked the past perfect. (Christ is risen. I am become death.) Thankfully we changed that one.

All together you can end up with was-was-was peppering a text. Instead of telling people to look out for that, they unfairly singled out passive tense and made it taboo.

[Anonymous No.21628987]

How do I find beta readers to screen out potential political themes in my work, whether to excise them or play them up to appeal to the crowd?

[Anonymous No.21628990]

>>21628906
Ah, this man is from my alma mater, he must be intelligent

[Anonymous No.21629050]

>>21628846
1st person perspective, for starters, then, look at a beautiful woman, an actual one and transcribe your memory.

[Anonymous No.21629062]

>>21628872
>>21628878
Some context- My character's name is Aja (dickgirl/trap/femboy/whatever) and she's currently wearing very formal attire, in particular, some high-heeled shoes. I don't know why she's wearing any of that yet, but I figured maybe she just got back from a ball or a formal meeting or something. I'll write it later. Also important to note, during this excursion, she experimented sexually, in secret, with someone else (TBD) at this gathering, hence the apprehension and being uncomfortable with the mess she's made.
I know it's probably bad practice to just write stuff and then make up what happens before, but this story is more or less an excuse to string together a collection of sexual scenarios I find arousing in a semi-competent way.
Also, the princess's name is Vaosajna (Voe/Vow-Sahn-Yuh). I draw some vague inspiration for the tropical land from Brazil in particular and I try to make some of this stuff sound Portuguese, though except for names, most of the proper nouns/special concepts are just random sounds put together until they sound like a unique thing. Anyway, here's a snippet of my coom writing. Be gentle because I have no clue whether I write on a fifth-grade level or not

The cautious gip-gallop of your shoes is quickly detected by your young master. You're not getting past her in those shoes (or anyone else for that matter.)
"MISS A-A-A-A-JAAAA!"
*Sighhh...* "Y-Yes, my darling princess Vaosajna?" Smile and nod.
"...can you help me with something..?"
Huh. She got a little quiet. Wonder what's up..?
"Be right there!"
Oh, dammit! Your undergarments still outline a *very* obvious erection, (despite the size of your penis). Rushing from the busy hallway and setting yourself up in a secluded corner, you swiftly bring what remains of your once-clean dress up to your chest with one hand, and with the other, you bring down your soiled and stained panties, still warm and gooey from your... 'Excursion.'
"...fuck..."
"...Ajaaaaaa?" Her tone continues to grow more whiny and aggressive by the second. You're REALLY hoping she doesn't come out, considering you'd be in eyeshot of her.
"A second, honey!"
While you're barely able use your hands in a coordinated matter, you manage to stop shaking for a moment to bring your ever-so-sensitive tip to the waistband of your drenched panties, and throw your dress down. Mmmh... It's starting to drip!
All of the thick, congealed semen is starting to water down. A drop beads down your backside and onto your leg. You feel a slight tickle as it rolls down like a watery bead of sweat. Once more, you feel another bead caressing your leg. Soon, the musty, intoxicating aura of semen pervades the air while drops of watery cum drip nonstop. Many of them roll down to your ankles, and into your shoes.

[Anonymous No.21629086]

>>21629062
your pleb tier fetish aside
>...
>... ...
>...
>...
>... ...
>...

[Anonymous No.21629099]

>>21628952
I agree with this take - "active voice" complaints often come as an attempt at saying that someone's sentences are structured in a wordy & repetitive way, and 9 times out of 10 that includes a ton of "was". But it's not that "was" that was the issue, but rather very simple/lazy phrasing.

[Anonymous No.21629108]

>>21628703
>>21628228
>>21628212
>>21628202
>>21628138
still confused, so people like Big Ass's Pub House will reject me if I put my work on royal road? Not that they'd accept me anyway, but let's say I put it up there and deleted it the day before I start querying. Can people find the footprint of it being on the internet once, or do people not care enough to dig that deep?
Also this is fucking stupid, what do they care if I put words online? If I'm going to spend hundreds of hours on a book I'm going to shill it every which way until sunday and beyond, if true then the big trad can even more vehemently suck my nuts.

[Anonymous No.21629121]

>>21629108
>still confused
don't worry about it, you'll never get published by them no matter what you do

[Anonymous No.21629147]

>>21628987
Oh the implication... Yes we aren't good beta readers. Honestly, I'm a sigma reader myself. You can ask someone else from this board, though.

[Anonymous No.21629158]

>>21621980
Reminds me of My Hero Academia.

[Anonymous No.21629160]

>>21620298
it's a simple bayesian classifier lol. it's garbage.

[Anonymous No.21629174]

I'm new to writing and i don't get how i'm suppose to come up with plots.
I've tried just writing but i don't get anywhere, i just end up making the characters stand around talking about nothing

[Anonymous No.21629208]

>>21629174
>plots
it's simple. give a character a goal and make that character really proactive in trying to get what he wants. then throw in stumbling blocks and failure that must be adjusted to or overcome. there's your basic plot.

[Anonymous No.21629220]

>>21629174
Your main character wants to murder the CEO of a major tech company, Mr. Goldbergstein, who lives in a gated community and is heavily guarded at all times. This is because Mr. Goldbergstein raped the main character's mother when she was young and had her slandered by the ADL and blacklisted from many industries in retaliation when she tried to speak out. There's your plot.

[Anonymous No.21629228]

>>21629174
Holy autism. Relax, anon. You are supposed to have a sudden idea you will think about, develop and shape until it has some meaning and follows some narrative that is remotely amusing for you. Kinda like making something out of a constructor toy, but it's all in your mind, and details are scenes, and characters are the color of those details, and you are just tasked with piecing it together again and again until you have something good.

[Anonymous No.21629232]

>>21629174
Why do you want to write then?

[Anonymous No.21629247]

>>21629174
There are lots of ways do it. You can use templates and formulas and riff on them. You can assemble the plot from smaller pieces. You can copy the plot of an existing work. You can work backward from the ending. You can use tools like the 36 dramatic situations.

I see plot as an instantiation of a deeper principle of fiction, that of contrast. So rather than trying to "construct" the plot, I try to set up as many powerful opposites as the story can handle. In your case, I would try to find points of contrast between my characters, accentuate them, then force them together. There are two other principles I would employ to then create a full story.

[Anonymous No.21629275]

>>21629108
Traditional publishers won't consider a work that's already on the web. But they also don't accept work directly from authors. You need to get a literary agent first to pass it forward. And your agent should be the one explaining this stuff to you.

Even if you want to get traditionally published, the best way would be to get a few self published books under your belt to prove to the gatekeepers that you can write and gain an audience. Do all the work beforehand that they should do, and they might accept you.

[Anonymous No.21629296]

>>21629050
I've tried but that always leads to a subpar feeling as opposed to seeing a woman in front of you, tropic of cancer was good at giving me boners but I never got the feeling that any of the women were that good

[Anonymous No.21629319]

I don't know how to narrate. I simply describe characters doing things.

[Anonymous No.21629347]

>>21629319
Narration is better understood as stage directions and separate from description (which has more capacity for adornment) even through the two are usually entwined.

e.g "...using a ladle to stir a tarnished copper pot on a tripod all but swallowed by the flames."

The stirring is the narration, it's what you say to an actor on the stage when he asks you what he's supposed to be doing in the scene. Everything else is description, props and decoration.

[Anonymous No.21629386]

>>21629347
See, I don't think that way. I say it as
>She stirred the dirty copper pot on the stove.
>He said "Isn't that dirty? You have the heat on too high"
I don't "think" the way you do.

[Anonymous No.21629496]

>>21628846
She looked down to her panties; the fabric wrapped tightly against her heat while the cold wooden flooring pressed against her ass. With legs spread in a V, she touched the flooring behind her and leaned back, taking it the sight. I wanted to know how soft her skin would feel, how delicious the taste of her sweat was, and how hot her body would be when I wrestled her to the cold wood and shoved my tongue into her mouth.

so hows this???

[Anonymous No.21629595]

>>21619172
Well, shit, now that I know I'm in the /lit/ Top 10 infographic, I guess I should probably try a bit harder

[Anonymous No.21629814]

New thread >>21629812

[Anonymous No.21629826]

>>21629174
Most people get into writing because they have something to say.
I guess you don't?
If you're looking for mechanical advice, picrel is pretty good.

[Anonymous No.21629830]

>>21629275
Andy Weir's "The Martian" was free on the web, then a self-published e-book, and the tradpubbers still accepted it.

[Anonymous No.21629949]

Have any of you ever written a creative nonfiction essay, like the kind you'd see in a magazine - or one of those books of assorted essays? The kind of essay that isn't taught in (at least in my experience) the American university system. Beyond reading more of them, where does one go about learning the art of writing a good non-fiction essay?

[Anonymous No.21629984]

>>21629949
>creative nonfiction
So, establishment-press news articles, then?