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/lit/ - Literature


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21570022 No.21570022 [Reply] [Original]

this shit is boring fr, it's obvious only a sexless autistic could create something like this crap

>> No.21571767

bump

>> No.21571819

>>21570022
Le baste schizoid

>> No.21571941

Kant was married though

>> No.21571952
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21571952

Kant died a virgin and avoided masturbation his entire life.

Many people believe this made him some sort of awkward loser, the kind you might imagine meeting today, you know, wearing a outdated hat or posting on this very site. However, it is in fact entirely the opposite; that is, him being an awkward loser: for while he was a virgin -and avoided masturbation- he was actually quite funny and confident and even made others slightly uncomfortable with his joking mannerisms around sex.

For example: the story of how Kant demanded to be tucked in tight at night is often heard of as his way of staving off the urge to masturbate. What is not told is just how awkward Kant would make this for his servants.

Being virtually perpetually horny, and actually monstrously hung, Kant would get into get into his jammies and get under the covers and call on of his servants.
"Oh Jaaaaamers" Kant might say (assuming the servants name is James in this case)
"a-ah yes Mr. Kant"
"Call me Emmanuel! I've told you a hundred times"
Kant could tell his servants to call him Kant one time, then Emmanuel the next, and he did this for well over 2 decades that some of them worked for him and he laughed every time.

"a-ah yes sir, Emmanuel"
"oh and tuck me in, i don't want to visit the circus if it comes to town!"
"y-yes sir"
"you know what i mean by circus right?"
"yes sir"
Kant would joke about the "circus" coming to town; and this was in reference to a powerful erection that he would get under the covers, which could lift the fabric and "pitch a tent" as its said.

"y-yes sir, Emmanuel sir" the servant would say, his eyes already dropping to the floor because he knew what came next
"oh-oh noo tuck me in! The circus is coming! QUICK!"
James would be made to tuck Kant into bed while a massive erection formed (supposedly 10inches plus) And Kant would stare at James the entire time and breath really heavy muttering inaudible sometimes punctuated by "circus" with a big pleasant smile on his face.
The tuck in duties were supposedly rotated weekly by Kant's staff, but all of them have given similar accounts.

>> No.21571973

>>21571952
lol is there a website where I can find these stories?

>> No.21572025

>>21571973
ChatGPT

>> No.21572289

>>21571973
Come on, man, you can't immediately recognize text written by an AI even when it's this obvious?

>> No.21572501

>>21570022
This lil fella was asexual for sure

>>
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