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/lit/ - Literature

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20803850 No.20803850 [Reply] [Original]

What THE FUCK

>> No.20803874

>literally just pop a squat on any city

i assume this never happens and tolkien did not think about this at all?

>> No.20803883
File: 109 KB, 640x853, yxu7j1ueimf21.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20803883

Where did Tolkien give the size of Smaug? He drew him like half the size in that pic.

>> No.20803901

>>20803883
Half? He's like 5% the size of the OP pic where he dwarfs a 747. In Tolkien's drawing that's Bilbo for comparison, who's half the size of a human.A human could literally put a chokehold on Smaug.

>> No.20804122

>>20803883
>>20803901
Tolkien admitted he drew him vastly too small and Bilbo too big as well
That was never intended to actually represent size

>> No.20804166

>>20803850
Yesterday I had a vision in which armies were walking toward a pit with a dragon head and the camera was slowly zooming out and with humans there were traveling some huge lizards, and those lizards and humans were traveling on even bigger lizards, and the destionation, the dragonhead was so huge that probably millions of men would be able to stand on its eye
And then the camera zoomed out to the whol3 Earth and there were a dozen of such pits with dragonheads vidible from Earth, one of the pits were the size of Iceland

>> No.20804223

>>20803901
>A human could literally put a chokehold on Smaug.
Come try it, pussy.
-Smaug

>> No.20804343

>>20803850
He's a big guy.

>> No.20804456

>>20804343
>>20804343
>>20804343
>>20804343

>> No.20804493

>>20803850
The physical size of the mythical creatures doesn't matter all that much. One half-elf and some eagles killed Ancalagon. You have to remember that the whole world of middle earth is a dream, a song of a God. It's like a video game, you can scale up the size of the end boss but all that really matters is the stats.

For example, When Gandolf is fighting the Balrog there is a lot of hidden fighting going on outside of the material world. They are fighting in a mythopoeic sense, not a physical one.

>> No.20804517
File: 478 KB, 2456x1000, 1649156569557.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20804517

>>20803850
That's an inaccurate image.

>> No.20804546

>>20804517
Just how big is that mountain if that dragon is that large

>> No.20804555
File: 1.14 MB, 250x250, sensible_chuckle.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20804555

>>20804456

>> No.20804785

>>20804517
Imagining just me, a white man wielding a long sword and silver armor, walking towards this enormous beast, prepared for a glorious death

>> No.20805142

>>20804517
How the fuck do you fight this thing?

>> No.20805148

>>20805142
Ask Earendil.

>> No.20805153

>>20804343
for you

>>20804555
checkdd

>> No.20805162

Ancalagon have penis?

>> No.20805167

>>20805162
You wouldn't think so, but the dragons survived for millennia after Morgoth's defeat, so they must somehow be able to breed. Though we never see a female in Tolkien's stuff.

>> No.20805193

>>20803850
What?

>> No.20805221

>>20805142
With a flying boat iirc

>> No.20805241

>>20805162
Like many reptiles, dragons probably have 2 penises that come out of a hole when erect. Reptiles also have a dominant penis. They can be left-penised or right-penised, like how humans have dominant hands.

>> No.20805342

>>20805142
You wait for gravity to do its job

>> No.20805384
File: 350 KB, 2102x1000, 1538329288512.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20805384

>>20804517
We have a new estimates on recent finds from Tolkiens notes.
He was a big guy.

>> No.20805404

>>20805342
He was alive when the world was flat, before the Changing of the World in the Second Age, not sure gravity was the same.

>> No.20805776

>>20804517
Imagine the amount of taxes diverted towards only the daily feeding of such a creature.

>> No.20805782

>>20803883
I don't remember this image

>> No.20805787

>>20803850
Read another book.

>> No.20805793

>>20805782
Don't get a shit edition next time, then.

>> No.20805800

>>20804166
That was a cool vision anon. I pictured it in my mind and it was intense. What a beast you describe

>> No.20805815

>>20804456
heh

>> No.20805819

>Tldr; Tolkien is rubbish, read Beowulf

The size of the dragon is not important.

If you go back to Beowulf, you know that the dragon is a metaphor for war and treasure hoard, the ring-giver is a kenning for King, Lord / thane / atheling who distributes rings ie torcs, gold treasure / spoils, honour and glory amongst his warrior companions.

Tolkien wrote a poem called The Hoard which is essentially about how greed accumulated in a treasure hoard leads to ruin. The poem is here:
http://www.councilofelrond.com/2007/08/the-hoard-a-poetry-analysis/
Similarly, the dragon battle at the end of Beowulf arrives before a premonition of war and anarchy, intertwined with some Christian grail myth (some scholars believe this was added later) that strongly suggests the accumulation of treasure / unequal distribution of wealth, leads to covetousness, avarice, bloodshed, sin and downfall. This is what Beowulf is truly fighting and what he dies to in the end. So the dragon and treasure hoard in these stories is really a parable about how greed and unequal distribution of wealth lead to war. Of course Tolkien plagiarised all this and then in the films we get the opposite message Men Of The West You Must Fight etc. etc. because modern audiences can no longer situate fiction within history.

>> No.20805827

>>20804456
underrated post

>> No.20806955

>>20805384
>Body the size of north america
jesus christ

>> No.20806986
File: 265 KB, 1412x1080, lul.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20806986

>>20804456

>> No.20807010
File: 122 KB, 568x303, 1658956144626391.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20807010

>>20804343

>> No.20807019

>>20805384
> Ancalagon > Texas > Ancalagon
?????

>> No.20807119

>>20803850
I read The Silmarillion like a month ago and I don't remember any dragon called Ancalagon, I do remember Glaurung though.

>> No.20807161

Someone post the edit with Saint Georges

>> No.20807180

>>20804456
oooh I just got it

>> No.20807223

>>20805142
Nukes

>> No.20807226

>>20807119
Ancalagon appears in the same sentence he dies in. He's over-hyped by DnD larpers.

>> No.20807279

>>20807226
What?

>> No.20807303

>>20807279
Ancalagon's first appearance is his death.

>> No.20807314

>>20807303
dayummm, thats a showethought right there

>> No.20807429

>>20807019
It's a joke, you shmuck.

>> No.20807433

>>20807019
Wait.. HE'S RIGHT

THIS DOESN'T MAKE ANY FUCKING SENSE. THINK ABOUT IT, IT'S LIKE SAYING X > Y > X? HOW CAN X BE BIGGER THAN SOMETHING THAT IS BIGGER THAN ITSELF, THAT WOULD MEAN IT'S BIGGER THAN ITSE SELF

>> No.20807495

>>20804456
Based beyond recognition

>> No.20807523

>>20807433
That's crazy.

>> No.20807936

>>20804546
about tree fiddy

>> No.20808003

>>20807019
>>20807429
>>20807433

I believe I could shed a light on what >>20805384 meant to say.

The ultimate purpose of this image can be summed up in one word: IRONY. In irony, the author doesn't necessarily want to state a truth, but, most of the times, the opposite of it; in other words, it's a comedic resource that tries to indicate a certain truth via contrast, i. e., NEGATION.

So, in the context of the image discussed, the author is resorting to irony in order to indicate the negation of what he's actually displaying in the aforementioned image. In this case, the logical conclusion we can extract from the illustration, i.e., X > Y > X, is not what the author is trying to convey, but instead it's negation (~(X > Y > X). I could show the meticulous steps I used, founded in the most elemental axioms of logic, to reach the conclusion I'm about to show you; however, given it would take far more characters than this essay already requires, I'll jump right into the final conclusion. To the most demanding minds in this discussion, I would suggest you to wait for a more detailed demonstration in the book I'll seek to publish in a possible future.

The logical conclusion on the real message of the author's image is that (~(X > Y > X)), therefore (X <= Y <= X). However, X < X would be a contradiction, since it breaks the principle of identity. Therefore, (X = Y = X), and, to simplify the equation, (X = Y).

Now, we have reached the logical representation of the author's true affirmation. However those who analyzed the equation carefully would say something is missing. And in fact it is.

We have a relation of "equality" that connects both elements in question (i. e., the legendary dragon Ancalagon and the geographic territory of the State of Texas). But we never discussed in what sense both entities are "equal". Naturally, we could never say that a dragon from a fictional piece of fantastic literature can be the same entity as the graphical representation of the geographic limits that are held by a state. The context of this thread gives us the final hint that can glue the pieces together: SIZE. So, the relation represented by the symbols (=, >, <) can be interpreted as "same size as", "less size than", and "more size than", respectivelly.

So, the final conclusion of my line of though leads us to the following statement: "The dragon Ancalagon has the same size as the state of Texas".

>> No.20808275

>>20805342
This. Animals today (elephants and whales) are the maximum size which could be sustainable in our current conditions. If we believe the Middle Earth exists in same conditions as Earth so that humans may live on it, those huge dragons would be crushed by their own weight as soon as they spawned.

>> No.20808314

>>20805819
I appreciate the post here. I think it's also worth considering the dragon qua draco standard and it's connotations, and the fact that Germanic society ran on the circulation of loot in exchange for service.

>> No.20808328
File: 71 KB, 480x480, 1656363830596.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20808328

>>20808275
Woooooah, it's almost like it's a fantasy world or something

>> No.20808572
File: 14 KB, 320x240, muppets.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20808572

>>20804456

>> No.20808605

>>20808275
>If we believe the Middle Earth exists in same conditions as Earth
Brother, I literally explained that the world isn't the same in my reply >>20805404

>> No.20808623

>>20804546
If the dragon is that large, the mountain is *that* large. Kinda the point of a to-scale comparison..

>> No.20808645

>>20804456
underrated

>> No.20808690

>>20803901
Probably because it’s inspired by the dragon in Beowulf

>> No.20808725

>>20804517
Ancalagon is going to be in the Prime series

>> No.20809019

>>20804456
i chuckled softly

>> No.20809061
File: 78 KB, 361x560, A1C5A103-F78C-4F79-9706-6383F4F06D3D.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20809061

>>20804456

>> No.20809062

>>20804456
Amazing.

>> No.20809402

>>20804166
Ah yes, a vision of Satans armies in the end times

>> No.20809406

>>20804456
Very nice

>> No.20809414

>>20804517
Can someone photoshop Jeb onto this

>> No.20809446
File: 756 KB, 2456x1000, 1649156569557.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20809446

>>20809414

>> No.20809457 [DELETED] 
File: 2.52 MB, 4032x3024, 5786662B-B193-4B28-ABCA-DB55B440563D.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20809457

>>20803850
My dragon

>> No.20809462
File: 55 KB, 800x606, 817.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20809462

>>20809446
I meant Jeb doing tbis to take the place of the big dragon

>> No.20809470

>>20809457
More like your drake lol

>> No.20810064

>>20804456
Well done

>> No.20810068
File: 1.19 MB, 200x200, 1655452667641.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20810068

>>20809470
pwned...

>> No.20810070
File: 67 KB, 750x980, 1642510210601.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20810070

>>20804456

>> No.20810223
File: 52 KB, 540x960, 1610986947464.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20810223

>>20804456

>> No.20810725

>>20803850
was Smaug such a faggot?

>> No.20810756

>>20810725
no

>> No.20810778
File: 47 KB, 568x676, 1646933805800.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20810778

>>20804166
One time I had a dream I was in a valley like where you find that black dragon in dark souls 1
Well he was lying on the ground, exhausted and bloodied and wounded and he was staring at me and I could hear him crying, telling me how he didn't want go to Hell and that he was terrified
Then a knight came and stabbed the dragon in his head and he shuddered and started begging to not have to go there and then he died

>> No.20810838

>>20810778
based knight

>> No.20810853

>>20804456
why is everyone replying to this

>> No.20810883

>>20810838
I felt sorry for the dragon even though I knew he had done evil things, he made me pity him
Also I have a strange complex where seeing the prideful and powerful brought to their knees, humbled and humiliated fills me with angst

>> No.20810887

>>20804456
Fuuuuuuuuck

>> No.20810900

>>20810853
Newfags plus large reply count syndrome.

>> No.20810906

>>20810853
four yous.

>> No.20810934

>>20804456
Impressive. Nice.

>> No.20811400

>>20810853
>>20810900
here's your (You), you'll get it one day

>> No.20811516
File: 27 KB, 598x754, 1419299407765.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20811516

>>20804456

>> No.20811532

>>20803850
if Ancalagon was that big wouldn't there be an enormous dragon skeleton lying around somewhere? Even if he died like 10,000 years ago the bones would probably still be there

>> No.20811644

>>20803901
Smaug got completely exaggerated in legend by those Dale faggots to make their accomplishment seem like a big deal.

Same with the dwarves exaggerated how much gold he stole from them.
>"Hey Gloin, Smaug took 200 gold bars from us, right?"
>"Yea... uh, I mean, no! It was, um... 6 million! Yes, 6 million has a nice ring to it kekekekeke!"

>> No.20811655

>>20811532
Imagine the bone marrow. Entire cities could feast for months on his femur alone

>> No.20811697

>>20810853
because you're a newfag

>> No.20811878

>>20811400
I know what it means you tremendous retarded faggot. Here's your rage reply.

>> No.20812152

>>20803850
Was Glaurung the dragon in The Children of Húrin?

>> No.20812433

>>20810853
probably he's a bald guy meme idk i dont read

>> No.20812466
File: 158 KB, 800x600, Downfall_of_Númenor.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20812466

>>20811532
The landscape changed a lot since the First Age. It's possible that would've destroyed his bones.

>> No.20812706

>>20810853
because this board is full of newfags

>> No.20812718

>>20804456
o7

>> No.20812742

>>20804456
Congratulations, just when I thought this joke was done.

>> No.20812834

>>20804456
Christ, look at /lit/ getting ecstatic over a joke post that was novel on /tv/ a decade ago

>> No.20812883

>>20803850
>>20805384
>>20804517
what does he eat?

>> No.20812924

>>20808605
Brother makes a good point.

>> No.20812931
File: 323 KB, 569x821, 1658265702635088.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
20812931

>>20803850
I can't go back to dragons that don't scream "ahhhhh, CUNNY!!!" as they attack the heroine.

The cursed undead dragon was cool too I guess.

>> No.20813020

>>20812834
I don't browse /tv/ so it was the first time I've seen that joke and I found it quite funny.

>> No.20813431

>>20812834
I don't browse /tv/. You sound like you always have to one-up everyone you meet.

>> No.20813475

>>20804456
Basiert

>> No.20815190

>>20804456
Lmao