/wg/ ------- Writing General

[Anonymous No.20739337]

The Writing General

Shitty Light Novels Edition

You will make it if you persevere

Previous thread: >>20731203
For General Writing
>The Rhetoric of Fiction, Booth
>Writing Fiction: A Guide to Narrative Craft, Burroway
>Steering the Craft, Le Guin
>The Anatomy of Story, Truby
>How Fiction Works, Wood

YouTube Playlists for Writing
>https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLTCv6n1whoI23GmdBZienRW0Q0nFCU_ay Robert Butler
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6HOdHEeosc


Technical Aspects of Writing
>Garner's Modern English Usage, Garner
>What Editors Do: The Art, Craft, and Business of Book Editing, Ginna
>Artful Sentences: Syntax as Style, Tufte

Books Analyzing Literature
>Poetics, Aristotle
>Hero With a Thousand Faces, Campbell
>The Art Of Dramatic Writing: Its Basis in the Creative Interpretation of Human Motives, Egri
>The Weekend Novelist, Ray

Traditional Publishing
>you get to focus mostly on writing
>you must write a proposal to the publishers and sell your story to them
>you make 10-15% profit max, but they also eat all the risk and the costs
>self publishing is basically like running your own company
>you only need to do some simple marketing and reach out to readers

Self Publishing Options
>https://archiveofourown.org/
>https://kdp.amazon.com/en_US/
>https://www.kobo.com/us/en/p/writinglife
>https://www.royalroad.com/
>https://www.scribblehub.com/
>https://www.wattpad.com/

Self Publishing How-To
>risky, but much more profitable
>you must pay for everything yourself
>if you do, you will spend more time on running a business than writing, but can be worth it
>https://selfpublishingwithdale.com/

Poetry
>This Craft of Verse, Borges
>The Poetry Home Repair Manual, Kooser
>Western Wind: An Introduction to Poetry, Mason

Anime Writing (^･o･^)
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4on26mKakgs
>https://www.wikihow.com/Create-an-Anime-Story

For advertising
>https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=bQygKqJVFXg

AI-generated book covers
>https://nightcafe.studio
>https://huggingface.co/spaces/dalle-mini/dalle-mini
>https://app.wombo.art/

/wg/ Authors and Flash Fiction Pastebin
>https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ

Other forums
https://reddit.com/r/writing
https://writing.stackexchange.com/

[Anonymous No.20739339]

i have 8 races, 5 of them are fairly important to the plot but might be folded up into 4 races if i wanted to (light and dark elf just become elf).
however the 3 other races are not really super involved in the backstory.

basically it all revolves around elves and dwarves who have some internal problems but create a fairly advanced society.
then however, some bad things happen and civilization collapses, the story takes place in the ruins of the advanced civilization.

one of the events is that some shamanistic primitive giants fuck with the spirit world to try get more powerful to be able to stand up against the elves technological advancements. however they screw up and let loose a bunch of spirits and demons and the land starts becoming alien and weird. i could probably chalk this up as being members of the elves who wanted to go back to their old ways of being in touch with nature rather than living in a technological world, rather than an entire race of giants. or i could keep it as it is or try to bring giants into the backstory of the world more? what do you think?

the other two are just a furry race and a scalie race who i thought might work since they were already very primitive and would probably not be affected by the collapse of civilization but maybe that's just extra fat

[Anonymous No.20739351]

Is this the thread where you can get some critique?

[Anonymous No.20739367]

>>20739351

[Sange !Fde5Qjfb5g No.20739375]

>>20739351
This is the thread where you can "attempt" to get some critique.

[Anonymous No.20739403]

Hey anons, I'm half way through writing a fantasy book set in the Midwest. Kind of like a return to the iron age after thousands of years of depopulation and such (not really readily revealed through the writing itself just world building for me to help write my story about a group of mercenaries in the great lakes). There are fantasy races and I've used genetic engineering to kind of explain why there are different very distinct races / extremely different environments and adaptation.

Can anyone think of a semi scientific reason that actual magic would exist? I've considered psychics and even classic voodoo style witchcraft but I am just looking to have a loose magic system with some bizarre futuristic explanation.

[Anonymous No.20739405]

>>20739337
I'm going to write my 1000 page magical wild west isekai epic if it fucking kills me. And I WILL be super autistic about the worldbuilding and I WILL make it gay.

[Sange !Fde5Qjfb5g No.20739419]

>>20739405
Well here is what I think about that BULLSHIT-
You are aware of market trends and have come up with a solid business plan. I believe you will be successful.

[Anonymous No.20739610]

>>20739351
Yes. Post anything you want.

[Anonymous No.20739638]

>>20739351
Post your writing and you have fifty fifty chance of getting critique. Problem is when no one posts or talks about their writing and the shitposters take over the thread.

[Anonymous No.20739642]

>tripfag filtered
Feels good.

[Anonymous No.20739659]

I've been trying to develop a good contrast of masculine/feminine voice in dialogue in a story which involves a lot of people disguising themselves as the opposite sex. In this scene, the MC (a kid) is pretending to be a girl to meet with an assassination target, and I want his dialogue to sound female.

>As bidden, Eric went to the immense rosewood doors at the far end of the hall, which lay open in the cool evening. The servant there held his hand as he seated him in a small chair, and went to fetch his walking shoes. While his back was turned, Eric stole a glance up the hall, at his mother and the lord governor. She was on her knees once more, looking up imploringly. He couldn’t hear what was being said. The servant turned around, and Eric quickly looked back at him, smiling innocently. Sitting cross legged before him, the servant delicately fixed the elegant shoes to his feet.

>“His lordship must be quite taken with you, my lady. Such a fine gift. I can’t say I ever handled shoes so exquisite for one so young, before.”

>“He is ever so generous to me.”

>“More, perhaps, than to his wife.” He paused. “She mustn’t know I said that.”

>“He said I would bear kingly sons.”

>“He did? To speak of such things to a young girl! I never…”

>“It’s alright. I thought his meaning was quite dignified, not vulgar at all. Not to say, flattering in a way.”

>“Vulgar? No, I would never say his lordship had been vulgar! Dear, dear! Merely that, speaking of kingly sons to a girl of your tender age is, is simply presumptuous. It is like speaking of livestock.”

>“I didn’t feel like livestock. I thought it was a fine thing to say.”

>“Ah, I should not have ventured to make judgements of my betters. You, my lady, see beyond the first appearance of the thing, to the noble intention. Pay no mind to my small thing. Let me get your coat.”

[Anonymous No.20739837]

>>20739638
Okay. Search on smashwords for Nursing Daddy by Jessica Stone

[Anonymous No.20739845]

>>20739837
Post it here mon faggot.

[Anonymous No.20739863]

He had achieved what he wanted - peace and quiet - but the cost of losing his daughter made him gloomy, and the summer weather outside only made it worse. He closed his eyes and rested his head on the couch, but his skin grew grimy with the sweat of the sun.
Suddenly, he heard the front door creak open, and booted footsteps stamping on the carpet. He opened his eyes and saw Nell appear holding her arm; As she came stumbling in closer, he was able to see the cut on her elbow, and the blood trickling down her forearm.
“What happened?” Dick asked, astonished at her return and worried about her current state.
“I hurt myself,” Nell answered, blushing.
“Let daddy take care of you,” Dick said.
“Oh daddy,” Nell fainted.
Dick reached the phone and hovered his thumb over the button, ready to call emergency services, but then he saw Nell open her eyes.
“I’m okay,” Nell smiled.
Dick shot his arms underneath her fragile body, and carried her into his bedroom, lying her on the bed like an ornament.

[Anonymous No.20739884]

I've got a finished fantasy manuscript I might just plop on e-publishing but I'm tryna come up with a decent cover I could create for it. I'm not hugely an artist, but I might take various pictures and sort of spruce them up in editing to create an artistic rendering or something.

tldr tho, is there an fantasy cover interests and hates among anons? What makes you think a book might be interesting or dull when judging a book by its cover? I want to do something colourful so it inherently jumps out to the eye at least.

[Anonymous No.20739905]

>>20739337
>https://reddit.com/r/writing
Fuck outta here with this shit

[Anonymous No.20739959]

>>20739863
You need to cut your prose down to be more concise. It's very wordy and loses itself in unnecessary details.
You don't necessarily want to go as sparse as Hemingway, but his quote,
>If a writer of prose knows enough of what he is writing about he may omit things that he knows and the reader, if the writer is writing truly enough, will have a feeling of those things as strongly as though the writer had stated them. The dignity of movement of an ice-berg is due to only one-eighth of it being above water.
is good for making sure every word in your prose has a job to do, and you aren't just filling it with lazy hangers on who pretend to work at your expense.

[Anonymous No.20739961]

>>20739351
Why would you want random fags who've accomplished nothing critiquing your work?

[Anonymous No.20739978]

>>20739959
But what if by cutting I lose 50% of my first draft?

[Anonymous No.20740008]

>>20739978
Then you'll have freed up 50% of your space for more content.

[Anonymous No.20740027]

>>20740008
then what do I put in there? More plot? A new character with his own goals and antagonists?

[Anonymous No.20740053]

>>20740027
Up to you. If you think it's a finished, satisfying story as it is, maybe it doesn't need to be any longer. If you think you can do something that will add to it and elevate it, that's your call. Whether you do or not, the prose needs improvement.

[Anonymous No.20740067]

>>20740053
If I cut the prose, how do I make it not sound like a laundry list of events and reactions?

[Anonymous No.20740076]

Anyone got some experience of writing a story for a game?

[Anonymous No.20740099]

In order to revive /ffa/, we’re joining /wg/ for those who want to practice writing and discussing flash fiction!

How it works:
1. Choose a prompt (full list of unused prompts in following post)
2. Write a story 1,000 words or less based on the prompt
3. Post it in /wg/ with the words "for FFA" somewhere
4. Add a new prompt for the list

Anyone posting for the /ffa/ accepts that their work may be made available online (Creative Commons) or in print (available for purchase at lowest possible cost).

There’s only the lightest editing (typos, etc) so garbage-in garbage-out. While there are not quality/content requirements (aside from porn, extreme abuse or gore) that doesn’t guarantee all submissions get added.

Prior three volumes available for free (pdf, epub):
https://archive.org/details/@_lit_anthology

And print (low cost) here:
https://www.lulu.com/en/us/shop/anonymous-/gifts-evil-and-good/paperback/product-mgwkgv.html
https://www.lulu.com/en/ca/shop/anonymous-/rags-and-bones/paperback/product-9d7gp2.html
https://www.lulu.com/en/us/shop/anonymous-/simian-deluxe/paperback/product-y6z687.html

[Anonymous No.20740107]

>>20740099
>prompt list
A closet full of skin suits
A dating app with extraordinary risks and rewards
The academy of Paranormal Life Coaching
This will be India in 5 minutes
A grizzled detective goes undercover on 4chan
You reap what you sow
"Please don't forget what I told you"
The location the GPS took them to seems to be a little off
A tapestry constantly being added to
Murder in the Cathedral's sanctuary
The cellar houses wine and... bodies?
Finding a one-of-a-kind book in the library stacks
A co-worker has a hidden talent
A shut-in decides to go trick-or-treating
Marrying for revenge
Horrible timing for a pregnancy announcement
A game of twister at a nursing home
There is a ship museum in Utah
A librarian goes blind every Thursday
Someone crashes a child’s birthday party
POV of an alley cat in Istanbul
An unusual item at the bottom of the sea
Pina coladas and long walks in the rain
New shoes really make you run faster and jump higher
a slasher villain's first date
An elevator that doesn't work
>A flooded castle, sinking into the mud (in progress)
Why robot teachers were discontinued
A straight-laced man's unusual new hobby
Gender Selection Day
The whales save themselves
Elevators have been portals this entire time
Plants are proven to be sentient life forms
A lie is taken seriously, with far worse consequences than the truth
Japanese ghost fish
What lives beneath the moss
An embarrassing phobia

>Progress Report
Overall: 5 pieces completed, 1 ongoing
Since Last Update: 1 prompt completed

[Anonymous No.20740126]

>>20740076
>Anyone got some experience
Don't bother, you're retarded.

[Anonymous No.20740144]

>>20739403
Genetic engineering?

[Anonymous No.20740180]

>>20740126
I've played plenty of games written by retards, not an issue.

[Anonymous No.20740182]

>>20739403
Will to power.
DNA alteration from radiation.

[Anonymous No.20740198]

>>20739339
>i have 8 races
I've hope you've trained for them. I like the giants goofing up the spirit world more than the elves returning to monke.

[Anonymous No.20740214]

>>20740067
If you know what you're writing vividly in your own mind, you will know what it is essential to say and what the audience will pick up on without being told, as in the iceberg quote.
For example:
>“What happened?” Dick asked, astonished at her return and worried about her current state.
The reader can pretty much infer his surprise and concern from the context, and what he says. If you feel the dialogue doesn't get that across, you could change it to be more explicit. Like I said, how sparse you go is up to you, as only you know what you're trying to convey.
If you really know and feel the emotions and events you're portraying, you can omit the trivial or redundant without losing anything important.

I would suggest reading some authors known for the lean prose, like Hemingway, or for making use of implication, like Kipling, to see the contrast to a very explicit prose style.

[Anonymous No.20740261]

>>20739659
>dialogue to sound female.
Curious what methods specifically you're trying to employ?

I enjoyed the sample even though this place has me paranoid everything I look at will turn into coomer-bait.

[Anonymous No.20740333]

>>20740261
When Eric is acting like a girl, he says "I" a lot. "I thought" "I didn't feel" and his dialogue is more passive, eg reporting "he is" "he said" whereas male dialogue is more assertive and definitive, focusing on a subject, like the servant talking about the exceptional quality of the shoes or how young Eric is to be discussing childbearing with a much older man who seems to fancy him.
That was the idea, anyway.

[Anonymous No.20740408]

>>20739405
I was kinda back and forth on what I wanted to write.
I ended up with a fantasy story but wild west fantasy was another idea.
I played Darkwatch as a kid and I've liked fantasy western since then.
Modern fantasy I think has some problems with it being arguably too easy to just have characters load a 30 round mag full of silver bullets and go wild, where as the old west with its relatively modern but not quite weapons.
also a lack of phones and such allows things to spiral out of control.
a modern city could never really be under siege from vampires, but an old west town could.

[Anonymous No.20740423]

>>20740198
>I've hope you've trained for them.

[Anonymous No.20740426]

>>20740333
>When Eric is acting like a girl
back to tumblr

[Anonymous No.20740461]

>>20740426
He isn't a tranny. He's a young boy disguising himself as a girl for cynical reasons.

[Anonymous No.20740470]

>>20740461
yeah whatever you say faggot

[Anonymous No.20740474]

>My stick fingers click with a snicker
>And, chuckling, they knuckle the keys
I am now a fan of cacophony

[Anonymous No.20740479]

>>20739403
It depends. If it's soft sci-fi or science fantasy, use whatever you want. If it's hard sci fi, don't unless you can think of a very plausible mechanism for this to work by.

[Anonymous No.20740488]

>>20740474
You now have to go back

[Anonymous No.20740490]

my writing software desperately wants me to remove the word "polysyllabics" but I don't think there is a suitable substitution
>...her words took hateful shapes, stabbing with polysyllabics like subjugation and vassalage.

[Anonymous No.20740515]

>>20740027
subplots
self reflection
characters start out as noobs
they become experts
and a bunch of other stuff i can't remember

[Anonymous No.20740520]

>>20740490
Stop using writing softwares

[Anonymous No.20740549]

>>20740488
What did I say

[Anonymous No.20740552]

>>20740549
It doesn't matter, you have to go back anyway.

[Anonymous No.20740585]

>I never expected to get to the word count I write at. Which is, by the way, unhealthy to the point where I go to physical therapy and need to stretch to make sure my arms/shoulders don't suffer. I write about 20-30k per chapter twice a week.

>I started at 2k per chapter. And t hat was something I struggled to achieve. The transformation took about 6 years and moving from part-time jobs to writing full-time. And 9 million words of practice. All of these are factors; a writer who's on book tours or has a 'life' like family or another job just can't devote as much time to writing.

>It's not a competition or a sign of quality too, which I'm sure is obvious. Terry Pratchett wrote minimum 400 words per day with his busy schedule and look at the quality he produced. However, the final clue I have is that I'm writing a web serial.

>I am allowed to write without limit and that's freeing compared to what a lot of writers need to think in--the constraints of traditional publishing. They will NOT be happy with books that pass their usual limits. Web serials? 2 MB more space on a website is not going to get me in trouble.

>Also, my story benefits from having that length; I can tell you what's going on with each character. Some other stories might benefit from that like knowing what the hell the Fellowship ate beside lembas bread. I assume Legolas shot at least one rabbit but if he didn't that's also interesting. Then again, it wasn't that kind of story.

>Work + other obligations like friends is tough, samreay. I had a job where I could, while working, sometimes come up with a really good idea and I'd race back to a keyboard to write, but that's all I've got--frontloading some ideas for later. Oh, and cutting down my sleep so you write while you should be asleep for your job and get to work with 3 hours of rest.

>...Don't do that.


This is what a real writer looks like. Unending grind, 50k+ words a week, body used to the point of being damaged. If you don't know, it's Pirateaba, the author of The Wandering Inn. It's funny how people here do bullshit challenges like 200 words a day while people like him casually churn out a few novells a month.

[Anonymous No.20740633]

>>20740490
>the computer says something
well I think you should drop everything and do what it says

[Anonymous No.20740637]

>>20740552
Go back to the page, of course! Thanks, anon. You're a real friend.

[Anonymous No.20740639]

>>20740637
Go back to killing yourself.

[Anonymous No.20740655]

How's my opening?

[Anonymous No.20740656]

>>20740585
>It's funny how people here do bullshit challenges like 200 words a day
that seems insanely slow to me, I think I just hit 37k~ words and I've only been writing for 13 days.
last night I wrote out a 3000 word chapter, I just finished up a 2000 word chapter a couple hours ago.
the smallest I've done is just shy of 900 words and took less than an hour to write.
>>20740633
I got rid of it since it was useless but grammerly was on my ass about using the word slave instead of enslaved person.

[Anonymous No.20740686]

why cant i get any sales?

https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0B7QY8XZM

[Anonymous No.20740697]

>>20740655
You should dial back the commas and diversify your punctuation more. It also seems somewhat scatterbrained in a way that I don't think is deliberate, like mentioning that he was looking for driftwood at the top of the paragraph, complete with the purpose and intention of looking for it, and then mentioning it again at the bottom of the paragraph, again with the purpose.

[Anonymous No.20740728]

>>20740639
I can't do that! I have books to write and so do you! Go go go!

[Anonymous No.20740759]

>>20740686
>Daddy and Daughter : Dick Hicks wants to raise his daughter as normal as possible, but he can't when his daughter seduces him with her little eighteen year old body.
>by Dick Hicks (Author)
geez anon i wonder why

[Anonymous No.20740767]

>>20740686
because you are a degen brit.

[Anonymous No.20740793]

>>20740728
No you don't.

[Anonymous No.20740826]

Anyone use Motivation Reaction Units to write their stories?

[Anonymous No.20740865]

>>20740826
>Motivation Reaction Units
looks pretty good
have you used them?

[Anonymous No.20740875]

>>20740826
Formulaic writing is not good writing.

[Anonymous No.20740899]

>>20740826
never heard of them, read part of an article on it.
sounds natural to me, a story with a driving force should have cause and effect.
a story without a driving effect just sounds kinda like a bad story.

[Anonymous No.20740912]

>>20740826
Feels familiar, but yeah, proper ordering of thoughts, actions and perceptions / feelings is super important. Haven't heard of it called specifically by this name but I always assumed this stuff was common knowledge.

[Anonymous No.20740933]

>>20740826
Not really. I found Swain's whole thing too specific to screenplays and magazines. It was interesting to think about and sounded good while reading it, but it completely fell apart when I tried to test it by breaking down some paragraphs out of books I like. I think it's probably helpful to consider when you're trying to write a physically-driven scene where actions are the momentum that pulls the reader through the story. Just understand that it's only one form of momentum.

[Anonymous No.20740942]

How's my opening? I'm finding it difficult to ditch long sentences. Maybe I need to read more Hemingway and Steinbeck.
---
At the end of the old Coast Highway, just south of the mouth of the creek beside which Father Junipero Serra founded the Mission San Juan Capistrano, a small town reclines on the gentle hills above the beaches. Here, doors are left unlocked, the shops are closed on Sunday, and children roam the streets, vacant lots, and foothills until dusk in search of cures for their petty boredom. The town has not changed much in its hundred years, save for the interstate, which runs down its length and separates old town from new. But from the main street the fan palms and king palms and old red-tiled adobe houses in Spanish colonial style on the hills below still only occasionally interrupt the view of the ocean on the horizon, and as a rule the newer flora and newer buildings of newer styles are modest.

The descendents of the mestizos who arrived or were born in the centuries before to administer and service the Mission its trading, and who represented a sizeable portion of San Clemente, still lived around the outskirts and in the poorer parts of the town, and were generally as poor now as they were then. One notable exception was the aging Juan Rulfo de la Luna.

[Anonymous No.20740963]

>>20740942
It's bad.

[Anonymous No.20740970]

From last thread >>20737976
It’s going pretty good man.
Averaging at least 60+ people a day even on slowest days.
Get a lot some days as you can see. You could probably say I’m doing decent.
I’m the anon with 2 books in the top 30k you were shit talking with btw.
Idk why Sange takes his trips off and back on to have a convo with himself.

[Anonymous No.20740990]

>>20740963
thanks

[Anonymous No.20740998]

>>20740970
I should add I started out in this chat just like you guys about 2 years ago just listening to some brando sando lectures.
Writing isn’t hard once you can compartmentalize the different aspects of it and focus on what you’re lacking. It genuinely is the business end of things that 99.9% of you guys fuck up or refuse to touch.

[Anonymous No.20741025]

>>20740942
I feel you—it's becoming more and more apparent how skilled an author needs to be to weave a long, complex sentence that reads easily. It might help you to consider the viewpoint more and focus on only the details that would matter to the protagonist/narrator.

[Anonymous No.20741036]

>You can't eat your cake and have it too.

[Anonymous No.20741037]

i dont have the time, willpower, or energy to write a novel. but the ideas i have are novel-length

is it a good idea to instead spend time fleshing out the world with unconnected short stories?

[Anonymous No.20741067]

I'm doing the exercises in the back of The Art of Fiction (Gardner version). Here's exercise 3:
>Write three effective long sentences: each at least one full typed page (or 250 words), each involving a different emotion (for example, anger, pensiveness, sorrow, joy). Purpose: control of tone in a complex sentence.
ATTEMPT 1
I locked the door on my way out—even though I knew for sure that in those sleepless, morning hours nobody would find their way to our apartment, but I did it out of habit so that I would not forget when the need was more tangible—I locked the door under the porch light during the hours when night seems endless and my weariness had bled into a kind of awakeness that was more manic, that demanded the stretching of my legs onto the moonlit street, pacing down the double-yellow, no cars in sight, to the battery where even the bar-goers had made their way back to their cruise ships, and the harbor-waves broke against the wavebreakers, and every third street lamp, extinguished from disrepair, dangled over the concrete like a sick palmetto, to the catwalk where I hung limp over the railing and listened to my heart beat too fast in my chest, telling me to break out sprinting down the waterside—not from fear, but out of an excess of humanity, an ache for something that I did not understand—something that wouldn’t form from the mist over the harbor no matter how seriously I tried to shape it.

[Anonymous No.20741081]

>get into Christian aesthetic when reading bible
>put a lot of Christian themes and imagery into novel
>finish it
>snap out of it
>feel kind of cringe and edit some of it out

[Anonymous No.20741105]

>>20741081
Keyword: some

[Anonymous No.20741112]

Did anyone like the diamond dozen story? Before I quit writing it

[Anonymous No.20741166]

Sometimes I write for weeks at a time. Other times I go weeks without writing. It's just how my brain works. Is this 'consistent' enough or do I need to force myself to write every day to get better?

[Anonymous No.20741173]

Fuck it. I give up.

[Anonymous No.20741184]

I am at a conundrum.
Generally, I write based on a question I'd like to ask, or a statement I'd like to put out there. However, I also find I personally like stories that aren't that direct with their goals, as well as ones where the statement is made subtle by the story, or ones that simply paint a pretty picture. I paint pretty pictures for myself all the time, but those are often only for my own enjoyment.
Without losing my head over the question or the statement of my writings - if they do have such a base -I'd like to present these scenarios to my reader in the way I present them to myself, but I'm well aware of the troubles the fantasy genre has with spending too much energy in fabricating the side dish of context while leaving the main course of the story undercooked.

What do (you) think? How far could one go in painting the landscape without making the subject lose focus? Since we're at painting metaphores, how could I write the landscape equivalent of a story? If it serves as context, I'd consider something like Alice in wonderland to fit into my metaphore of landscape paintings, a story where the focus is the character's exploration of the park that is wonderland, as opposed to a focused portrait that could be exemplified with a classic fable.

Have a huge man for your troubles.

[Anonymous No.20741186]

>>20741173
Y

[Anonymous No.20741187]

>>20741112
I liked it. It was funny, even if there wasn't really anything else going for it.

[Anonymous No.20741195]

>>20741186
My story is shit and will NEVER EVER be good

[Anonymous No.20741233]

>>20741195
Y

[Anonymous No.20741268]

Does anyone have a solid book on grammar? I remember in 7th grade failing to learn what a "preposition" is, and I still have no idea. I wanna do DFW proud.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5R8gduPZw4

[Anonymous No.20741313]

In the year future space happens and then the people have to go to space. Then max spacechad comes and goes to space for the good of all men it is a small step for men but they are giant men with muscles *patriotic music plays*.
Then the aliens happen. But captain spaceman shoots them but he also says to his friend that dies that he is a very good friend until he died. I guess there's a lady there too.
In the end they have a parade with a dog but the dog is his friend from before and he came back to life as a dog and also he was a dog before he died but a different dog that looked the same and the screen zooms on his face and he smiles. It all happened good after all.

[Anonymous No.20741325]

Wo when I'm writing academic papers I apparently write about 25% of my sentences as passive sentences, but I think they read alright and my marks are generally HDs. But apparently a passive sentence percent above 10% is generally not acceptable. The only issue is, I don't think it particularly affects my readability. In fact I don't even recognise half of them because I know not to write something like "the experiment was conducted on x number of undergrads", I'd always write "x undergrads participated in the experiment".
Soo.. does it actually matter? Or is it one of those bullshit guidelines like flesch readability grade (mine is usually 13-15 for papers) that doesn't actually matter.

[Anonymous No.20741379]

Got called a hack today.

Is there like a checklist of insults on the path to success?

[Anonymous No.20741412]

>>20741379
Yeah, that's not on it though.

[Anonymous No.20741414]

>>20741325
surely passive sentences are more desirable in academic papers? Who is saying that >10% is too much?

[Anonymous No.20741431]

>>20739884
I have a real liking for fancy buildings and magical-looking locations.

[Anonymous No.20741437]

>>20739905
Why? Even Moot thought Reddit was better than this cesspool.

[Anonymous No.20741442]

Go away Boswell.

[Anonymous No.20741445]

>>20739403
Magic was always there.
Once technology was destroyed, magic reasserted itself.

[Anonymous No.20741449]

>write one paragraph
>happy with it
>write a second paragraph
>also happy with it
>read both paragraphs in sequence
>awful

[Anonymous No.20741454]

>>20741037
Sure. It worked for "Mrs. Bridge".

[Anonymous No.20741458]

>>20740126
>>20740470
>>20740639
>>20740963
seethe

[Anonymous No.20741462]

>>20739884
No people. I hate covers that look like a movie poster... that said stuff that looks like a painting adapted to be a cover is nice. Maybe like a Frazzeta painting. Otherwise, maybe some artwork that'd fit the cultures in the world

[Anonymous No.20741463]

>>20741437
>>20741442
But even Gardner posts on Reddit:
https://reddit.com/comments/j7poea

[Anonymous No.20741467]

>>20741449
Post it.

[Anonymous No.20741470]

>>20741412
Oof

So are you going to post the "real author achievment" list of insults?

[Anonymous No.20741475]

>>20741463
>Boswell back to shitting on Gardner
Crab.

[Anonymous No.20741477]

>>20741414
I would have thought so. Apa suggests using active voice as much as possible and I've seen guidelines from other disciplines (though never guidance in my field) suggesting 10 to 15% passive voice is a good guideline.

[Anonymous No.20741496]

>>20741475
How does pointing out that Gardner posts on Reddit qualify as shitting?

[Anonymous No.20741498]

>>20741467
maybe I don't like either paragraph
but I guess I would rather move on than workshop my opening paragraphs forever

[Anonymous No.20741505]

>>20740656
>grammerly was on my ass about using the word slave instead of enslaved person
jfc
the thing you got rid of was grammerly, correct? I hope so.

[Anonymous No.20741516]

>>20741475
Have you forgotten the Great Gardner Schizo Seething Freakout already?
That was just last Thursday and Friday.
He dominated two entire threads with it.
>>/lit/thread/20710136
>>/lit/thread/20714307

[Anonymous No.20741534]

>>20741516
>>20741496
Gardner was correct to be mad about that.

[Anonymous No.20741549]

>See people talking about how impossible it is to be published if you're not "pozzed"
>Can't figure out if they're memeing or not
Should I seriously be thinking about things like genderswapping my protagonist and highlighting people's (dark) skin color?

[Anonymous No.20741553]

>>20740942
You wish you could write like this anon. Me too haha

[Anonymous No.20741558]

>>20741166
Bump.

[Anonymous No.20741557]

>>20741516
Are you still kvetching about being caught rating yourself a 4* while giving Gardner a 1*?

[Anonymous No.20741564]

>>20741516
>He dominated two entire threads with it.
Based

[Anonymous No.20741567]

>>20741549
Just send your books to publishers under the name "Yalitza Wong (fae/faer)" Or be a man and self publish. Thats a bitch though

[Anonymous No.20741578]

>>20741549
They’re stupid, don’t listen to these downers. You can write successfully.
I am >>20740970

[Anonymous No.20741582]

>>20741534
Gardner was correct to be mad about his own history of posting on Reddit?
>>20741557
Or assuming that anyone but Gardner makes multiple Goodreads accounts?

[Anonymous No.20741598]

>>20741313
Critique my brilliant writing fools, notice the subtly crafted allegories and mastery of language. Tremble before the awesome display of psychological and philosophical insight.

[Anonymous No.20741599]

>>20741557
LOL. Touch grass already, Gardner. >>20717330

[Anonymous No.20741602]

Boswell constantly seething about crabs when he was the biggest crab all along.
Only person I've seen legitimately jealous of Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20741603]

>>20740655
It has problems anon. First line should not be orphaned like that but connected to a following paragraph with an “and”

But the bigger problem you have is one of logic where your second paragraph doesn’t make sense. You never say what the game is.

Are you trying to say that finding the luggage is a game? How so if it just washes up?

Your intro as it’s written now is the kind of writing that produces headaches. Try again.

[Anonymous No.20741607]

>>20741603
YOU'RE SEETHING YOU'RE FUCKING SEETHING

[Anonymous No.20741624]

>>20740655
And no, rummaging through luggage is not a game either.

[Anonymous No.20741661]

>>20739610
>>20739638
>>20739375
>>20739961
I'm the original critique requestor. I went to bed.
Glad that Nursing Daddy guy got to share his own stuff. Anyways I've paste binned my first draft. For context, I haven't written any fiction in a long while and just jumped into an idea without really thinking too much, just to get some exercise. I'd love to hear about anything you can point out that might need work. Basically what motivates me once again to write is this time I'd like to live of it, as I'm starting to really struggle financially, and I thought writing some low-level erotic novels might help me make some cash.

Text : https://pastebin.com/eWL2zsBu

[Anonymous No.20741671]

>>20741603
Seems like he is trying to talk about the effects of sensory deprivation. The smallest things become a rush of dopamine like winning the lottery or a game.

[Anonymous No.20741672]

>>20741602
If you wrote nothing but trash for 10+ years that no one read only to have some 68iq upstart meme himself into a readership you might be pissed as well.
Boswell is still a fucking retard but I can slightly understand his position.

[Anonymous No.20741677]

>>20741672
Boswell got a 4/5 stars. He's one of the best writers on /wg/

[Anonymous No.20741691]

>>20741677
I have myself a 5* so actually I'm the best writer here.

[Anonymous No.20741694]

>>20741672
I had nothing against Gardner, until it became obvious he had been the seething schizo samefagging pseud the entire time.
I'm honestly surprised by this turn of events.
Somehow I had this image of him that he would be above such behavior, and would help other writers with whatever knowledge and wisdom he gained along the way.
But the truth turned out to be the exact opposite.
I wish it hadn't.

[Anonymous No.20741698]

>>20741677
Oh yea?! I have a 5* that's NOT from /wg/. A random old lady gave me a 5*

[Anonymous No.20741718]

>>20741677
Nah, not by a long shot.
I really hope Hell Anon and Rabbit Catcher come back...I really want to see the rest of their stories.
>>20741691
I gave "Son Of The Sun" and "Salvation On Peril Island" 5 stars on Amazon.
Glad to do my part to promote unknown writers!

[Anonymous No.20741728]

Imagine reviewing yourself and only giving a 4*. How low is your self esteem that you can't even realistically rate yourself a 5* for promotion purposes.

[Anonymous No.20741730]

>>20741698
And I'm very proud of you for that, anon!

[Anonymous No.20741731]

>>20741661
>Nursing Daddy guy
>guy
The author is a girl I thought

[Anonymous No.20741739]

>>20741728
Imagine being so petty, having already gotten kicked off Goodreads for review fraud, to assume others can't get a good review without fraud.

[Anonymous No.20741743]

>>20741553
I did anon. It's hard, takes forever.

[Anonymous No.20741747]

>>20741694
>give Gardner a 1*
>give self a 4* with a 2.5k word review waxing poetic about how great you are
I wonder why Gardner is upset.

[Anonymous No.20741795]

>>20741534
>>20741557
>>20741602
>>20741747
Gardner refers to himself in the 3rd person. Schizo

[Anonymous No.20741799]

>>20741731
I asssumed otherwise, I suppose.

[Anonymous No.20741810]

>>20741728
he needed to make it believable.

[Anonymous No.20741814]

Does this Gardner guy even garden? Fucking fraud.

[Anonymous No.20741817]

>>20741810
Should have given himself a 1* then.

[Anonymous No.20741824]

>>20741718
>I really hope Hell Anon and Rabbit Catcher come back...
Good to know I'm not the only one who remembers

>>20741166
Only you can answer that question. Nothing wrong with taking breaks and reading more, but I suspect it couldn't hurt to at least have a weekly writing ritual to help keep you consistent so one of those off periods doesn't extend into years like it has for me in the past.

>>20740585
It's funny that a PirateApeshit shill shows up every few weeks and always they have the same wordcount maximalist grindset. I'll take a quality 2k short story over 20k of max speed "workmanlike" prose.

I'm just curious where you guys are getting manufactured.

[Anonymous No.20741835]

>>20741795
This if anyone is talking about F Gardner, it's F Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20741838]

>>20739337
miniMAG post

Issue 4 will be out Friday

submissions open for issue 5

[e-mail]

minimag.space

>>20740655
games typically stave off boredom, "found something in whatever we found", you don't need all them words

but hey, you've got a clear setting and tone and I want to know what's in the damn luggage

that's pretty cool

>>20740942
damn I like that second sentence

just keep in mind: the audience won't recall half of these details after about 3 pages unless they directly come up again

[Anonymous No.20741848]

If anyone is putting down Gardner, it's Boswell.
At least when when Gardner talks about himself he's trying to entertain people with his writing. Boswell just wants to milk you for booze money with tricks.

[Anonymous No.20741860]

can you tell me how awesome of a writer i am i want to know

>An eternal night, was stretched out as far as
>Otto could see. The sky was pitch black, and
>seemed to last forever. Not a single star was in
>the sky. Very different from the sky back on
>Earth. In the mortal world, Otto could usually
>see at least some stars. Otto’s home was in
>Chicago. In the city. So, that meant the sky
>wasn’t always as clear as it would be,
>otherwise. In the country, the stars in the sky
>can seem boundless. They’re visible and
>plentiful. But in Chicago, it wasn’t quite as
>clear. You couldn’t see as many of them, but
>they were still there. This place however, was
>unlike Chicago. There wasn’t a single star
>which the boy could detect. The sky was empty,
>devoid of a single star. It was just pure
>darkness above him. Starless.

[Anonymous No.20741863]

>>20741848
Ok Gardner

[Anonymous No.20741866]

>>20739337
>anime edition
Yikes.

[Anonymous No.20741870]

>>20741838
>>20741498
you said it- move on and it will figure itself out later

[Anonymous No.20741875]

How do I make a website? How much does it cost?

[Anonymous No.20741886]

>>20741870
>>20741838
Nice, but it could use some... presentation. What do you do these with?

[Anonymous No.20741893]

>>20741739
Why are so many authors lolcows? kf has a few and there is a thread on lolcow about authorcows. Do only cringy spergs write?

[Anonymous No.20741896]

First off, buy a domain. It's like $10 a year and usually comes with a website builder. You can either use the shitty free one, which is fine but takes a bit of time to spruce up. Or you can transfer your domain to a better website builder which cost you a bit more. I use Dotster and GoDaddy to buy my domains, for some I use the built-in web builder, others I use SquareSpace and Wordpress. Have a fiddle anon.

[Anonymous No.20741897]

>tfw I am writing for normies
>I am writing for expressly sociopolitical aims
>Hiding my opinions behind entertainment value
You all will rep me and meme me, right?

[Anonymous No.20741901]

>>20741896 Meant for >>20741875

[Anonymous No.20741902]

>>20741875
depends on the tools you want to use + domain name you choose + services you want on it

minimag.space costs maybe $10 a month (minimag.com would have cost a lot more)

wix.com has a really good website design tool but costs an additional amount per month (maybe $30-$35 total) just to use it

I used godaddy for hosting and they have a wordpress online plugin that lets you do the design there. It's aight for super basic stuff

[Anonymous No.20741904]

Not bad today
Got 2300 words written today, edited, and thus far I've made $20 on Vella for July so we'll see how the bonuses next month
I'm hoping I made at least $300 in bonuses but I still have no idea how they work just that I got $10 for 7 (unpaid) views last month
Some people in the fb group talk like they make a lot with Vella
Also got my readermagnet figured out and I found out that one of my characters exists in the same universe as another which was a pleasant surprise
>>20741875
I pay like $250 a year for wix and $25/year for my domain
Can probably get it cheaper but I always forget when it renews

[Anonymous No.20741908]

>>20741897
If you can fake sincerity, The View will do that for you.

[Anonymous No.20741913]

>>20741904
>I pay like $250 a year for wix and $25/year for my domain
lmao'ing at your life

[Anonymous No.20741926]

>>20741913
Why? I'm not a poorfag
Also my artist designed my site so it looks cool

[Anonymous No.20741932]

>>20741886
literally using Pages (mac's knock off word processor)

keeps it simple to get an issue done each week

but the... presentation... suffers

(doesn't help that my graphic design skills are non-existent)

[Anonymous No.20741934]

>>20741926
>Why? I'm not a poorfag
Maybe not but you are an idiot.
>Also my artist designed my site so it looks cool
Post it and let /wg/ be the judge.

[Anonymous No.20741945]

>>20741934
Don't you ever stop seething, Gardner?
It's obvious when you're not around.
The character of /wg/ improves dramatically.

[Anonymous No.20741950]

>>20741934
I'm not sharing any of my work here after seeing so many anons talk about how they don't want others here to succeed
I dont want any low star reviews out of spite and I'm aiming for Hollywood one day so I gotta pretend I'm not from here

[Anonymous No.20741969]

>>20741950
fucking yeah man

literally none of that makes sense

but fucking yeah man

[Anonymous No.20741976]

Is it weird to have a side character that's a three foot tall rat? Other characters include a tall rabbit skeleton with a suit, a plant man with green skin and grass for hair, a pink haired bearded fat guy, and a completely normal 11 year old boy.

[Anonymous No.20741977]

>>20741661
Can I get a quick review? I'm not invested so much in the subject matter. Just the writing. I'm rusted, haven't written in a while. I want to know what might glare at you, upon first read. Thanks. It feels like I have blinders on, now.

[Anonymous No.20741978]

>>20741950
>I'm aiming for Hollywood one day

[Anonymous No.20741982]

>>20741950
>how they don't want others here to succeed
Nah, it's just the one guy.
And he's been banned from every site where he could possibly rate your work.
You're safe.

[Anonymous No.20741984]

>>20741976
I'm intrigued anon tell me more

[Anonymous No.20741990]

>>20741976
After "Alice In Wonderland"...I'm pretty sure all that stuff is just fine.

[Anonymous No.20742004]

>>20741904
>>20741902
>>20741896
Maybe I'll just use blogspot. It's free and easy to use.

[Anonymous No.20742021]

>>20741932
The issues of the mag seem small enough so ilovepdf should work for bundling up several images into the one pdf you want for your issues. photopea is a free online tool that'll be the closest you can probably find over the table to not-photoshop.

Some basic bitch advice: split the page into thirds, and play around with that. Margins are nice. You can use your caligraphy to arrange the page and close the gaps in the writing

[Anonymous No.20742022]

Reddit here. Is Call of the Crocodile the best book from this board? I’ve begun reading it and thought I’d ask since I know it came from /wg./ If you have any other books for me to read from /wg/ go ahead and tell me. I already plan on making a post about F. Gardner’s series in a subreddit for readers I actively post in. So go ahead and tell me about what else I should read that came from here. I find the whole subculture of 4chan created literature fascinating and if I like the books you tell me about then I’ll mention them there. Thanks guys.

[Anonymous No.20742028]

>>20742022
>Reddit here
No shit huh Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20742047]

>>20741976
Sounds like he fits right into it, and if Lewis could have talking mice in Narnia why not a rat?

[Anonymous No.20742053]

>>20741984
tldr: boy gets so depressed that he slips into an another dimension that he narrowly can either escape or destroy by reaching the edge of that world
less tldr:
>enough depression or anhedonia can kill you instantly
>those that do die that way are sent to a purgatory dimension set up by ancient magic cultists to give those that were destined to become completely bored of and dead to life go
>anyone who can reach the northern edge of the dimension can claim it as their own
>since its creation the world has become corrupted without adjustment for decades, since no modern wizards exist
>when you get there you have a candle that represents what remained of your life. with it in your hands you can feel full emotion and care, just as if you were a normal person on earth, and explore the new vast world you've been given
>once your candle goes out naturally, you lose that ability and life is more pointless than ever. people without a candle go insane.
>their bodies change into a beast or other kind of creature that naturally dwells on that dimension (every character I listed is an example of each)
>you can either rot and turn into a stuffed doll edition of yourself, or find someone who has a candle and burn yourself to ash.
>turning into a doll takes a long time, burning with ash is instant
>an eleven year old boy is sent there and is the first to arrive in a long time, he meets weird characters, visits strange environments, traverses dangerous and unnatural places and tries to reach the end of Remoria to claim it

[Anonymous No.20742068]

>>20741505
yes, I removed grammerly, though not for that.
I removed it since it just didn't work, it wanted me to make changes to sentences like have being changed to had when it made no sense and wasn't even grammatically correct.
And as soon as I hit about 1600 words on a single chapter it would start to tank my PC performance for some unfathomable reason.

[Anonymous No.20742087]

>>20742053
Oh, you're the Remoria anon!

[Anonymous No.20742097]

>>20742087
you remember! that's good

[Anonymous No.20742112]

>>20742097
Yeah, I like the inventiveness of your setting enough to remember it so that's good.

[Anonymous No.20742117]

>>20739337
Newest article

https://adolfstalin.substack.com/p/on-philanthropy

[Anonymous No.20742133]

>>20742117
Maybe they just need to work less.

[Anonymous No.20742135]

>>20742053
I like this a lot anon I will read if you share it and provide some feedback
Reminds me a bit of Over the Garden Wall
Such a cool concept

[Anonymous No.20742137]

>>20742133
Come again?

[Anonymous No.20742146]

>have 10 incomplete stories
>2 complete stories
>look at the other 8
>I have no idea what the fuck i wrote.

[Anonymous No.20742156]

>>20742021
you're blowing my mind here

much appreciation

gonna go fuck around and find out what works

[Anonymous No.20742160]

>>20741976
>a three foot tall rat
12 kingdoms did it better.

[Anonymous No.20742200]

>>20742160
should I read that? on the fence

[Anonymous No.20742202]

>>20742028
You realize that guy was willing to promote and shill everyone’s books on a popular subreddit.

[Anonymous No.20742204]

>>20742202
Better to die in obscurity than be promoted by you.

[Anonymous No.20742210]

>>20742202
Yeah, Gardner shows every sign of doing that here.

[Anonymous No.20742223]

>>20742202
While you were coming up with these, and other, pathetic copes, I was writing.
Another 1,000 words toward my next novel.
Which I intend to post in public, in its entirety, for free.
Which you haven't done, despite demanding everyone else do it.

[Anonymous No.20742228]

>>20742202
So now you WANT to post on Reddit?
Pardon me if I get whiplash.

[Anonymous No.20742230]

>>20742200
Are you female? If so, yes. If no, you will never understand it. And troons do not count as female.

[Anonymous No.20742236]

>>20742202
>a popular subreddit
Oh? Which one?
And why would anyone on that "popular subreddit" consider your opinions credible?

[Anonymous No.20742242]

>>20742236
>And why would anyone on that "popular subreddit" consider your opinions credible?
Uhh he's literally THE F Gardner?

[Anonymous No.20742247]

>>20742223
All of Gardner's writing was posted for free by him. He even bought ads to give them away more effectively.

[Anonymous No.20742252]

>>20742247
Wow that's super cool Frank.

[Anonymous No.20742253]

What do you think of this concept?
>There was only one world, and the world was supposed to have perished permanently when it died
>The 'mother' (World) however did not want things to end, and so she tried to save the last child who died and who was taken by Death
>When she confronts Death, he presents her with the two possibilities this child can take: A life filled with happiness or one of nothing but despair
>She agrees to this believing that having humanity survive is more important than condemning it over a single child
>Since then, every world has been at odds with the previous in varying degrees and the real Death is no more for all humanity is born from the dead
>Furthermore, in every world there exists two people tied by fate: The seed that brings life and the reaper who cuts it reflecting the split possibilities shown by Death

[Anonymous No.20742257]

>>20742242
Not a real gardner.

[Anonymous No.20742272]

>>20742253
I missed the link between the first and the second part of your world. So for every person that got to live in paraidise, there's another one that lives in hell?

[Anonymous No.20742275]

>>20742253
I could be too high but this doesn't make any fucking sense

[Anonymous No.20742279]

>>20742253
What
>>20742275
It isn't you being high anon it really doesn't make sense

[Anonymous No.20742293]

>>20742247
Where? Post live, working URLs.

[Anonymous No.20742298]

>>20742293
Nice try Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20742302]

>>20742242
>literally THE F Gardner
lel
so popular, reddit had to suspend his account to contain the all that popularity?

[Anonymous No.20742308]

>>20742298
It's OK, I wasn't actually going to read them anyway.
Not if they're like >>20741860

[Anonymous No.20742312]

>>20742253
I wrote a story for this universe.
A guy goes to the store and buys milk. The milk is tasty. Then a bunch of exposition about the nature of the universe happens. The end.

[Anonymous No.20742318]

>>20742202
Lmao. Fucking hilarious.

>Redditor asks for book recommendations by writers here.
>Deleted.

[Anonymous No.20742321]

>>20742202
Crab in bucket mentality desu

[Anonymous No.20742324]

>>20742204
Only a jealous loser would have such a mindset.

[Anonymous No.20742331]

>>20742324
Jealous of what retard? That you post on reddit? ACK yourself my man.

[Anonymous No.20742336]

>>20742331
That other people (particularly F Gardner) would be getting more exposure than you.

[Anonymous No.20742356]

>>20742336
First of all, F Gardner is not a person. Second, nobody is getting any exposure. Third, you need to go back.

[Anonymous No.20742369]

>>20742356
>F Gardner is not a person.

What?

[Anonymous No.20742372]

>>20742272
>>20742275
>>20742279
Rest assured you're not, I'm dumb. The tl;dr would be:
>There's no actual Death as an entity any more because all life has already died, the last person born in say, world A oversees world B and brings it to an end when its time comes
>People strive for immortality and fear death because they do in a sense remember that they're supposed to be dead, and depending on how their worlds ended they might even attempt to sabotage the next to get their world back
Basically, one part is a creation story and the other is about the conflict arising from said creation.

[Anonymous No.20742373]

Since we're -trying- to talk about settings, here's mine:
>The world ended
>No cool viruses, no crazy nuclear war, no asteroid, society just collapsed on itself on a global level and it was back to survival mode
>Because no major cataclysm happened, a lot of the old world survived
>Cars included
>Follow John Protagonist as he drives accross the wasteland figuring out what's there to believe in after the end of the world
>...Not in a cool war rig though, he delivers shit for people

[Anonymous No.20742376]

>>20742369
F Gardner doesn't exist.

[Anonymous No.20742381]

>>20742372
I'm still stumped on how people can sabotage the previous and the next world. Isn't it that just the baby from world 1 has god powers?

[Anonymous No.20742420]

>>20742381
Well, to put it in another way every world that dies has its own memory and the memories of those people have power. In my setting people know it as 'Rot', an unknown sickness that decays everything around it which is really just the malice of people long dead.
>Isn't it that just the baby from world 1 has god powers?
There's actually two children born from this pact between the Mother and Death, one of the child is considered blessed by the world and the other is doomed to be the next Death. Now, the real big problem caused by this is that the ghosts of the previous world managed to get their hands on the first child well before the second awoke, and if they succeed in trying to replicate the utopia that was the only known living world it would lead to permanent death, because as said they don't understand that goal is impossible. Maybe these meds are really doing a number on me.

[Anonymous No.20742421]

Aww... I got my first rejection from an agent.

[Anonymous No.20742422]

The mindless janny scum actually banned me for mentioning your idol in this braindead thread. Can you imagine the creature?

[Anonymous No.20742433]

>>20742421
Congrats! Put it on a wall for your kids to ask you about it, yeah?

>>20742420
Okay, so I missed a lot of context from the original post.... I'm too tired for jrpg lore right now, but keep up the good work

[Anonymous No.20742446]

Should I write a book, write a VN instead of a book (my art is decent), or maybe just kill myself?

[Anonymous No.20742451]

>>20742446
Post art and your questions will be answered

[Anonymous No.20742463]

>>20742421
Why bother? Traditionally publishing is just a pure numbers game. Hell Sanderson wrote 13 books before someone gave him a chance. Then after he made a name, he ignored his agents and went to kickstarter. Even he doesn't give a crap about being Traditionally published anymore

[Anonymous No.20742570]

>>20739403
Maybe you could say an asteroid or something impacted earth and brought with it matter with heretofore unheard of properties, maybe it has fields similar to electric and magnetic fields, or something like that. Also you could have the asteroid impact is what depopulated the midwest

[Anonymous No.20742582]

Reddit here again. I don’t really understand why my post was deleted but okay. I still plan on making my post on Reddit. But you guys aren’t giving me anything else to work with here other than Call of the Crocodile and the rest of F Gardner’s works.

[Anonymous No.20742586]

>>20742582
Holy shot this is ironic. Deleting this again is only going to help Gardner lmao.

[Anonymous No.20742590]

>go away

[Anonymous No.20742593]

>>20742586
*holy shit

Fucking autocorrect

[Anonymous No.20742597]

>>20742590
Too late, mate. It seems it is the year of the crocodile.

[Anonymous No.20742602]

>>20742451
Hows this

[Anonymous No.20742609]

Get lost Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20742617]

>>20739403
Magic has always been real, it was hidden by the Powers That Be, and is heavily masonic

[Anonymous No.20742622]

>>20742602
I hope that took you less than 5 minutes. It's catastrophically basic if that's what you can offer, and your only hope is finding such a striking style for the rest of your visual novel's UI that the artsyle fits in

[Anonymous No.20742643]

>>20742433
Thanks. It's okay if neither of us gets it because this is a pretty late reveal.

>>20742373
We could call it John's Last Delivery.

[Anonymous No.20742645]

>>20742622
It probably took less than two, I mostly just make tons and tons of doodles along the lines of that one when I probably should be trying to refine them into something more presentable. If people at least find it endearing like the art in the When They Cry series then I can be happy with that.

[Anonymous No.20742647]

>>20739337
I'm new here, and I'd like to share my current WIP and start reading some of the stuff posted in this thread.

I'm aspiring for this story to be what I affectionately refer to as "Literary Fantasy," if such a thing exists. The first two chapters can be found here: https://www.dylandevinewriter.com/book-preview

The cover is slightly misleading, as it makes the book look more like YA when it reads like a hyper-realistic historical novel, even though it's set in a fictional world. The setting is largely based off of late-medieval Norway and ancient Welsh folklore.

I understand well that I'm not entitled to free feedback just because I post something of mine, so I genuinely thank anybody who reads even a line of it for taking the time to do so.

All thoughts and criticism are welcome, don't be afraid to rip it apart.

In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy my stay and start critiquing some of the other writing samples here, since everyone is always posting about how no one ever replies to their writing posts.

[Anonymous No.20742662]

>>20741977
>>20741661
You have a good grasp on how to turn a phrase, but I'd think about dialing it back just a bit. It's too much; not everything deserves such detail and description. This is the whole "less is more" thing.

I like your cadence/voice and I see what you're going for. But in the text you have too many commas, and this comes off as jarring and "jagged" in places, especially where you could just as easily do without a comma entirely. For example:
>Instead he focused himself at recalling a different incident which had happened during this playful outing, wherein a few of the girls had conjured up a trick upon him, by forcing him into a fateful first altercation with Rebecca.
>Salema and him were, by chance, attached at working on the same bush, which seemed thicker, and promised to provide more ornate cuttings, heavy with berries, and knelt close to each other, each concerned at trimming their own patch. Susie, arguably the local town’s self-appointed matchmaker, had noticed, and quickly sprung up, holly twig in hand, bearing fruit, to dangle it above their head, as if awaiting a good catch.
Think of what you get with each comma, and whether or not other punctuation can better achieve what you're going for. More than anything it seems to me you're using the comma to achieve a certain voice (specifically via pausing). That's great, but you also have to take note of how it's jumbling up sentence clauses when you use so many. It feels like I'm entering a complex function that's trying to do too much. Each sentence like this staggers the reader and takes them out of it the moment they give the wrong intonation or inflection or pause to a single comma; they'll get lost. Read what you write after a session, out loud if necessary; try to approach it from the perspective of the reader. Other punctuation is at your disposal: periods, semicolons, parenthesis, colons, em dashes. Even unconventional syntax or punctuation or spelling can be your friend in hitting a certain voice.

[Anonymous No.20742667]

>>20739863
There's not enough context here to care about what's happening or who these people are. The tone is confusing too--you have someone bleeding out, but at the same time calling the guy "Daddy." And when he sets her on the bed "like an ornament," it gives the impression this is supposed to be smut or something, but I'm not sure if that's what you were going for. There's also numerous grammatical errors, please do a cursory surface-level edit for typos and bad grammar before submitting samples for critique.

That being said, while there's not enough context for me to care about this scene, nothing stood out as terrible, and you should definitely keep working at it.

[Anonymous No.20742672]

>>20742662
You're right. It's been so long since I wrote something fiction...I'm consumed by academic work. I think I tried to pull all the stops, and exercise all the tricks in my book. I will admit I am a bit of a comma whore. I need to work on that. I can't rely on descriptive ellipsis so much. I really do need to tell less. If I may, I'd like to get your opinion on this subject. To me, it often feels like when I adopt a more blunt, direct exposition method, re: character's feelings or events, I tend to come off as cold/distant/brutish. It's hard to explain, it's either all or nothing at all with me. I can't pace myself. I guess I'll try to consciously work on this process. Thanks a lot for the lengthy insight, it really did help clearly and quickly grasp these issues, which frankly, have plagued me for quite some time. I am a repeat offender at those. I guess it's back on the saddle again for me.

[Anonymous No.20742690]

>>20741498
This is actually quite intriguing. It reads well. Keep at it.

[Anonymous No.20742696]

>>20740655
The scene is good conceptually; the idea of opening with kids (or really bored adults) stranded on a beach scavneging and playing games is a good way to start. Where the execution is lacking is in the sentence structure, it's quite awkward. There's some typos too, make sure to polish your samples before sending them out for critique, because they're distracting.

Here's how I would rewrite it, line by line:

"Luggage occasionally washed up on the beach.

When we weren't searching for food or improving on the destitute shelters we had made, we would pillage whatever fortune delivered to us on the waves and pass the hours excitedly taking our minds off of our dire situation.

While I was gathering driftwood I spotted a large carry-on bag embedded in the wet sand, and with this fortune lifting my spirits I made my way back to camp. I kept it closed, wanting to save the surprise and cherish the anticipation of wondering what treasures could be hidden inside."

This style might be a bit too purple for you, since I admittedly do go a bit overboard with flowery language, but this is just one possible way to rewrite it so that the sentences aren't backwards or disjointed from too many commas. Hope this was useful.

[Anonymous No.20742700]

>>20742647
I stopped reading at the first wiggly line with a pencil.
I'm not energetic enough to read a big text cold turkey at the moment, but you as the writer could've helped me last longer by picking where you want me to spend my focus. Personally, I think the pig baptism and the scolding are more important to setting Enid, Sienna and Dustin's characters than going up and down the refectories, and yet the latter takes a much higher wordcount than the former... and for what? You've told me plenty about the little village feel of the place already, I don't need you to tell me the monastery is old for me and my bias to already imagine an aged wood and stone building.

And then, for the characters. I was unsure of it at first when it was just the kids, but after looking through Margaret and Olav I feel your characters have the mentality of a 2022 first worlder rather than someone who lives in a monastery in the woods. The irreverence of the children is natural, and mostly unnoticed, but for someone that's dedicating their life to religion, Brother Olav is not only very relaxed with holding up the rules, but doesn't seem particularly upset with children baptizing a pig. Have you seen the movie Aquelarre? Do you know how the priest in that movie reacts when someone has farm animals do sacraments?

So yeah. Pick your paragraphs, trim your wordcount, tell me what I need to know and let me work out the rest. My personal opinion is to give the personalities of the characters you've written a second look - It doesn't mean that Olav has to lose his shit if the kids make an unauthirized depiction of Soulkeeper Aelia (PBUH), but do make him fit into his pants.
I just realized I feel like I've read the name Aelia in five or so fantasy worlds by now. You don't need to name the people Mathilde and Athalhaidus, but some of the more generic fantasy names could be swapped out, doubly so if they're important people

[Anonymous No.20742711]

>>20742700
>>20742647
Jeebus fuck I scrolled down and saw the map.
Good on you for putting the map at the back and not at the front. It's a controversial topic, but at least a fraction of the argument does not give half of a fuck about how pretty your world map is, unless it's somehow useful you're just filling a checklist of what fantasy books have

[Anonymous No.20742714]

>>20740942
The sentences aren't too long. This sample is actually a pleasant read, and I like your style, but it feels quite detached as an opening scene.

When a reader is starting a new book, they want to be grounded in the scene and setting quickly, and this reads like a travel magazine.

Don't get me wrong, the ideas here are good. I like the detail about the shops being closed on Sundays. But the descriptions come across dry and very "telling" rather than showing.

The obvious downside to "showing" all of this stuff is that it dramatically increases word count, but for something as vital as the opening scene, it would serve your narrative better to immediately ground the reader in a character and show them around this place rather than telling them everything directly via the narration.

[Anonymous No.20742721]

Day 45 editing
Chapter 56 correctly tensed
>Today i had the realization that i wont be alive for the next century
I hope we all make it before that happens.

[Anonymous No.20742723]

>>20742721
Speak for yourself, I'm gonna live forever! Hope you make it too, though.

[Anonymous No.20742726]

>>20742376

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=HsLfrpEAfB8&t=3205s

Are you saying this isn’t Faggot Gardner? Who is being interviewed then?

[Anonymous No.20742748]

>>20741661
Read a few paragraphs of it. It’s oveewrought and purple. Also if your goal is to make money writing erotic stuff the only market is female. Don’t waste your time writing for men.

[Anonymous No.20742753]

>>20742748
Yeah. I'm writing for women. It's a classic tale of the ugly duckling, enemies to lovers, I think it's a good formula. I think women like purple prose, to be fair, they do seem to enjoy ornate visuals and ample descriptions. I do have to abbreviate it as best I can, there were some good points mentioned about my drawling syntax. I suppose I need much more exercise.

[Anonymous No.20742754]

>>20742667
>it gives the impression this is supposed to be smut or something

[Anonymous No.20742758]

>>20741498
This is quite good, my only concern is that the second paragraph throws a lot at the reader really quickly. This whole sample is engaging and chalked full of interesting ideas, I would just pump the breaks on the second paragraph. You probably subconsciously knew that but wasn't sure how to pinpoint the problem.

It's also a wall of text, but all it takes is a press of the "enter" key to break it into two smaller paragraphs.

You're right though that workshopping the first few paragraphs for protracted periods of time won't get you anywhere, so for now I'd just leave it as-is and then come back to these early parts with fresh eyes after you've written more.

[Anonymous No.20742765]

>>20742582
>Reddit here

Why did I laugh so fucking hard at this? Gardnerposting is honestly the funniest meme this board has.

[Anonymous No.20742769]

>>20742765

[Anonymous No.20742774]

>>20741893
Yes.

[Anonymous No.20742790]

>>20742672
Don't worry, I'm a comma whore too. Every time I do a first proofread of something I write, whether it's an email or an essay or a 4chan post or a creative story, the first thing I do is look at my comma usage and try to determine if I went too far again. Looking back at my original reply to you I already see where I could've cut back once or twice. Unfortunately it's had the effect of making me a semicolon whore too now. I love doing the sort of cadence crafting that you're doing too, and I can totally see exactly what you're getting at, but we have other tools at our disposal we can use to achieve the same thing in a more readable way.

As far as the more direct approach coming off too cold or distant, it may just be a matter of exposure and practice. Especially if you're used to writing in the more circuitous, tailored way. I'm very far from being any sort of expert or person that feels confident providing writing advice here, but in my experience short sentences generally work well when action happens in them, as opposed to simple description. For me they can more easily be "colored" by the surrounding text or tone.

[Anonymous No.20742789]

>>20742053
This is an awesome idea, anon. Ideas are cheap, but if you can execute this well, you've got a killer story on your hands. It all comes down to the execution.

[Anonymous No.20742795]

>>20741893
Congratulations. You figured out why F Gardner is so popular on this cesspool.

[Anonymous No.20742803]

>>20742795
That combined with F Gardner’s “epic twists XD.” Don’t forget one of his books is a Pokémon ripoff. And another one has himself as a main fucking character where he’s a beloved and famous writer. Literally Chris Chan 2.0. All he has to do is wear a dress now. His flat earther beliefs already tip that absurdity over the edge.

[Anonymous No.20742805]

>>20741037
That is what I am doing, so sure.

[Anonymous No.20742812]

>>20742790
Honestly, quite similarly, the moment you quoted the text asking me to focus on syntax structure, specifically my comma usage, there it was glaring at me, I could not conceive how I did not see it.
I've become quite unaware of it, on some level. I'd like to adopt a more telegraphic approach. I'll try to refrain myself from constructing complex sentences. Maybe I'll try a formula. Three direct simple sentences, for each two complex ones. Perhaps it'll help. Notice any difference in this text? I tried to apply myself. I really need to make a conscious effort.
Where it gets complicated...Is when I need to describe. It's harder for me to expose without relying upon that crutch. Perhaps a healthy mix between simple, active sentences, and a few lengthy passive, or descriptive ones.
I feel like I've made some progress. Thanks for your valued contribution. It's quickly set me straight and forward with addressing my own stylistic issues. Again, it's much appreciated.

[Anonymous No.20742814]

>>20742700
Interesting, especially your last point about the name Aelia being very common. I haven't seen it before, but it's a pretty simple name, so I can imagine it being more common than I expected. I worry that I might have introduced too many characters too quickly, and perhaps putting the brakes on that will help alleviate the focus you were talking about, but I'll have to see what other readers think. Thank you for the feedback!

In the physical print version of the book the map will go at the front, but for this preview there was no reason to put it first, but Squarespace's broken UI is killing me.

[Anonymous No.20742826]

>>20742814
The characters you introduced seemed to be introduced at a good pace for me,it was the overall flow of the stories I had issues with

[Anonymous No.20742830]

So I just finished Bird by Bird. The only thing worth knowing about the book is that you should focus on completing small things instead of getting overwhelmed by the whole project. Otherwise the book is... so badly written, so padded and boring.

[Anonymous No.20742916]

>>20742803
I can't get over his claim that smoking doesn't cause cancer
How can anyone be so absolutely retarded
And his source for this claim? Japan.

[Anonymous No.20742924]

>>20742916
He’s a weeb.

[Anonymous No.20742929]

>>20742916
Asians along with slavs are genetically immune to negative effects of smoking so it makes sense.

[Anonymous No.20742955]

>>20742803
F. Gardner’s ego is certainly as big as Chris Chan’s. He thinks of himself as Dante and gets really mad.

>inb4 Shut up Boswell.

I am not Boswell.

[Anonymous No.20743017]

which gods to avoid when incorporating the Dragonball-esque fever dream that is Hindu Mythology?

[Anonymous No.20743020]

>>20742803
Can someone explain his le ebin twists?
I'm not reading or paying for his shit

[Anonymous No.20743027]

>>20743020
The twists for all of his books?

[Anonymous No.20743037]

>>20743027
Yes

[Anonymous No.20743080]

>>20743037
I've only read Call of the Crocodile. This is going to take a while for me to type. Call of the Crocodile's twist is that the family for the first half of the book never existed and were made up by a kid who browsed /x/ and tried to make a family of tulpas for himself. The twist is revealed in a chapter where the kid who you think got eaten by a crocodile is still alive and he's playing with a Ouija board in a treehouse. The treehouse is struck by lightning and the kid is hospitalized. Then there's some out of body chapters where the kid is in this DMT realm and tormented by elves and the tulpa family tries to kill him for creating them. The kid sees the reader of the book and then snaps out of the DMT trip. Then an evil cult named Ouroboros kidnaps the kid, Stephen King and JK Rowling and brings them to Dracula's Castle (which has been relocated to Chicago) because they want to burn it down with a bunch of people inside as a Satanic sacrifice for The Great Reset. The kid burns down the castle early causing the cult to flee and then the ghost of the kid's dad saves him along with Stephen King and JK Rowling and they all watch the castle burn down together.

[Anonymous No.20743087]

>>20743080
That honestly sounds like the greatest thing ever written.

[Anonymous No.20743096]

>>20743080
Holy shit. No wonder it’s memed so much.

[Anonymous No.20743120]

>>20743080
Wow I'm speechless
There is some effort there but like the other anon said no wonder it's a meme
Gardner shouldn't have the ego he does though because no way does something like this justify it
But why did the kid make up that he got eaten anyway

[Anonymous No.20743139]

>>20743120
I think it’s explained that the /x/ ritual required him to somehow write his own life into the lives of the tulpa family. And the only way he could manage that would be if they thought he was dead.

[Anonymous No.20743148]

>>20743139
Otherwise it wouldn’t work because he already exists in the real world. At least that’s how it’s explained

[Anonymous No.20743151]

>>20739403
This actually sounds awesome

[Anonymous No.20743159]

>>20743080
Gardnerchads…..I kneel…..

[Anonymous No.20743161]

>>20743080
FUCK he's good.

[Anonymous No.20743166]

>>20743080
That sounds bizarre.

[Anonymous No.20743189]

>>20743159
>>20743161
Gardner wait at least more than a minute between jacking yourself off

[Anonymous No.20743227]

>>20741950
I change my submissions to /wg/ enough to make them difficult to connect with the original. You would need to be A1 autist to match the writing style of a published book to my few sporadic /crit/ posts on here.

[Anonymous No.20743246]

>>20742602
Refusing to put in even a quarter thousandth of effort doesn't magically raise you above critical evaluation.

[Anonymous No.20743250]

>>20743080
KINO
I
N
O

[Sange !Fde5Qjfb5g No.20743383]

>>20742647
Anyone remember that Jim Carry movie Liar Liar?
You should find some way of tying this to that movie, like its a prequel or something. Maybe this bitch is his great great great great great grandaughter.

[Sange !Fde5Qjfb5g No.20743400]

>>20741950
This.
/wg/ critique is only good for people who know they suck and are still learning the ropes. Anyone who is making real progress with writing in a non-memeing way isn't going to post their work here.

[Anonymous No.20743453]

>>20742602
Looks like it'll have to be option 3, old chum.

[Anonymous No.20743460]

>>20742696
>>20741838

They are meant to be three adults stranded on an island after a plane crash-two guys, and one girl. They don't really find anything special that really happens, there's just nothing to really do to kill time...I was thinking of making it a black comedy where one of the guys gets jealous that the girl is warming up to the other one so tries to find a way to kill him to make it look like an accident...Then other people show up just after he's killed the other guy

[Anonymous No.20743518]

Part of me wants to solicit criticism on my novel here. Another part wants to collect the criticism privately becuase I know damn well this website will interpret the existence of criticism as proof it's garbage.

[Anonymous No.20743556]

If you want to make this a career you have to treat this like a business.
What business doesn’t advertise itself?

[Anonymous No.20743557]

>>20740998
This, desukar

[Anonymous No.20743603]

>>20742053
>>20742097
Nice to see you're still writing. I recall giving feedback on the first couple chapters months ago and honestly you're very creative and your prose is certainly good enough for fairytale-core. That monster fren genuinely made me scared me a few times and the kid in the bucket is sick.

[Anonymous No.20743612]

>>20742955
In Gardner's schizo mind, we are all Boswell.

[Anonymous No.20743618]

>>20742053
kino

[Anonymous No.20743622]

>>20742830
Saved. What's your next book?

[Anonymous No.20743627]

>>20743087
>>20743096
>>20743151
>>20743159
>>20743161
>>20743250
It's really sad when you jack yourself off like this in public, Gardner.
Especially when your "writing" is like this >>20741860

[Anonymous No.20743703]

Why can’t I ever seem to write anything that’s long? How can I stop this?

[Anonymous No.20743744]

>>20743703
You arent making it complex enough. Add more subplots, settings, ideas, events, characters. Then you will have a lot to write about.

[Anonymous No.20743754]

>>20743744
This, try thinking like a reader and see if anything about your story has questions that can lead to more to say.

[Anonymous No.20743779]

>>20739351
You're better off on reddit

[Anonymous No.20744021]

Hello frens, I asked about my alliteration addiction a few threads back and I had a weird idea since.

One of my PoVs is supposed to be this super anxious dude that has trouble talking and saying "no" to people. I want to juxtapose his internal monologue, which is "normal" / confident with his extremely timid and anxious outer self. Got the idea from Joe Abercrombie's books where he has a few scenes in which the PoV's internal monologue says one thing, but his external monologue says something else altogether.

Here's a shitty little impromptu example to illustrate what I'm trying to say:

>*Do you take me for a slave? I ain't doing that if you put every knife onboard at my throat. Frankly, I'd rather chew a glass sandwich than do that, so why don't you fuck right off back to whatever soggy crevice you crept out of and do your own damn work?*
>"Of course. I'll get it done."

[Anonymous No.20744024]

>>20742830
what was so good about the Lisa Cron book?

[Anonymous No.20744025]

>>20744021
heh

[Anonymous No.20744032]

What' does it mean to make it?

[Anonymous No.20744044]

>>20744032
I want to write a chapter the way that Thomas Mann does where it's a long conversation, but there aren't any quotes at all.

[Anonymous No.20744062]

I just want to make minimum wage from writing. Is that too much to ask?

[Anonymous No.20744070]

>>20744021
This reminds me of the Halloways from Something Wicked This Way Comes. Its 3rd person but Bradbury spills character thoughts to the narration often times and when Charles or Will thinks its often two contradictory statements back to back :
>I like it, he thought, I don't like it.

[Anonymous No.20744077]

>>20744062
Yes.

[Anonymous No.20744080]

>Daniel Greene couldn't even get a book deal or traditionally published
>He has a huge following
>Easy money
>Still no deal
How hard is it to get traditionally published?

[Anonymous No.20744098]

Why am I obsessed with metrics like char/word or syllables/sentence instead of just writing what sounds good?

[Anonymous No.20744112]

>>20744080
it took jk rowling six years to get "harry potter" traditionally published
she polished and revised it the whole time, but she didn't give up

[Anonymous No.20744114]

>>20744098
No idea. I hit my literary peak.

[Anonymous No.20744159]

Should I drop out of my nursing course and pursue a creative writing degree? Writing full time for 3 years seems like a dream come true.

[Anonymous No.20744170]

>>20744112
I just realized, if I do get one book published and a second one, how easily can I be dropped by an agent? Just because I got one good book doesn't mean I can sustain it. I should try serialization instead. Seems to make way more money.

[Anonymous No.20744173]

>>20744159
Hell no. Get your RN and see where it goes from there. You can make a shitload of money doing travel nursing. You can even throw working completely on the back burner except to keep your cert and go to school for creative writing.

[Anonymous No.20744174]

>>20744159
William Carlos Williams was a doctor

[Anonymous No.20744192]

I love writing so much, bros.

[Anonymous No.20744201]

>>20744159
Just be a unregistered nurse, basically the same thing.

[Anonymous No.20744227]

>>20744173
I am potentially being kicked out of the course for breaching professional conduct. I have been made out to be some sort of predatory based on my autism toward my female roommates so just looking for another degree to jump ship to that wont make me wanna kill myself like this nursing course has made me thus far.

[Anonymous No.20744252]

>>20744227
Autists do good at computer stuff and accounting.
Maybe science too. Albert Eistein looks autistic a.f.
I think some famous writers are autistic too.

[Anonymous No.20744255]

>>20744070
Interesting, I'll check that out. Cheers.

[Anonymous No.20744256]

>>20741458
it's bad anon. best to take their advice.

[Anonymous No.20744270]

>>20744192
I'm going to start writing next thread. I swear.

[Anonymous No.20744279]

>>20744227
Kek now you must go through with it, being an aspie around a pack of nurses is a goldmine for narrative. I demand stories about you interacting these nurses.

[Anonymous No.20744282]

>>20743250
>>20743166
>>20743161
>>20743159
>>20743120
>>20743096
>>20743087
Fuck off Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20744301]

Kill all jannies. Torture them, burn their homes and salt their lands. Kill all jannies.
There is no place for mercy when it comes to jannies. A janny has no soul.

It's not really murder.

[Anonymous No.20744314]

Anyone dumb enough to think any janny does anything good or useful needs to fuck off forever. Why are you here you mindless subhumans? Why do you actively seek out anything good just to ruin it? Leave.

[Anonymous No.20744317]

>>20744227
write a book about that but from the perspective of the female roomates
instant best seller with the fem psycho/thriller audience which is a lot now they think discussing crime while putting makeup on is appropriate

[Anonymous No.20744343]

>>20744317
Write a book about hunting down and murdering 4chan janitors. Use their real names and locations, it's easy info to find using social engineering.

[Anonymous No.20744361]

>>20744159
What would you do in four years?

[Anonymous No.20744382]

>>20744024
The writing was awful and some parts were just annoying but there is really good advice in there

[Anonymous No.20744387]

>>20743622
Today I'm going to read a short one, which is Ernest Hemingway: On Writing

[Anonymous No.20744474]

<!-- wp:paragraph -->
<p>Climate change </p>
<!-- /wp:paragraph -->

<!-- wp:paragraph -->
<p>Without a doubt, this is on the top of the list, however I will explain that, though this may have been a known issue since the 70's, nothing has been done because it is part of the 'plan'.<br>Climate change will cause environmental problems that will escalate to supply chain issues and food shortages around the world as well as making certain areas of Earth near uninhabitable for extremely long periods of time.<br>This incoming 'filter' is a global environmental disaster that will be weathered by enormous amounts of funds, dedicated to keeping a small group of elite alive.</p>
<!-- /wp:paragraph -->

<!-- wp:paragraph -->
<p>The reality is that little can be done in regards to stopping this, the 'Event Horizon' has been crossed long ago with the growing population of Earth and we are experiencing environmental effects not predicted for 50 years. The disasters that the scientists told us were coming tomorrow, are here today.</p>
<!-- /wp:paragraph -->

<!-- wp:paragraph -->
<p>Outdated Religious doctrines</p>
<!-- /wp:paragraph -->

<!-- wp:paragraph -->
<p>There are less believers now than there have ever been in history, it just doesn't mean as much to the common person as it did, even 50 years ago. Religion never accounted for technology, it never made the assumption that there would be gender movements, there's little relevant philosophy that isn't ambiguous and confusing and science is almost completely out of the question.</p>
<!-- /wp:paragraph -->

<!-- wp:paragraph -->
<p>There's no wonder why religion has been on the decline in the last 50 years and unfortunately, aside from the field of self-help development, which is in its infancy and not nearly complete in its doctrines, nothing has been offered to be a suitable replacement to religion in this modern age.</p>
<!-- /wp:paragraph -->

<!-- wp:paragraph -->
<p>God is effectively a forgotten entity, the great plan is subdued for individual happiness, collective spiritualism is often tainted by sexual, violent or greedy behaviour.<br>Honour, righteousness and dignity are far gone conceptions in this day and age, without God serving as a greater force of fear to instil piety and discipline. But without greater insight to serve the psychological needs of the masses, depravity has seeded itself throughout the modern generations.</p>
<!-- /wp:paragraph -->

how does it read? like garbage?

[Anonymous No.20744488]

Climate change

Without a doubt, this is on the top of the list, however I will explain that, though this may have been a known issue since the 70’s, nothing has been done because it is part of the ‘plan’.
Climate change will cause environmental problems that will escalate to supply chain issues and food shortages around the world as well as making certain areas of Earth near uninhabitable for extremely long periods of time.
This incoming ‘filter’ is a global environmental disaster that will be weathered by enormous amounts of funds, dedicated to keeping a small group of elite alive.

The reality is that little can be done in regards to stopping this, the ‘Event Horizon’ has been crossed long ago with the growing population of Earth and we are experiencing environmental effects not predicted for 50 years. The disasters that the scientists told us were coming tomorrow, are here today.

Outdated Religious doctrines

There are less believers now than there have ever been in history, it just doesn’t mean as much to the common person as it did, even 50 years ago. Religion never accounted for technology, it never made the assumption that there would be gender movements, there’s little relevant philosophy that isn’t ambiguous and confusing and science is almost completely out of the question.

There’s no wonder why religion has been on the decline in the last 50 years and unfortunately, aside from the field of self-help development, which is in its infancy and not nearly complete in its doctrines, nothing has been offered to be a suitable replacement to religion in this modern age.

God is effectively a forgotten entity, the great plan is subdued for individual happiness, collective spiritualism is often tainted by sexual, violent or greedy behaviour.
Honour, righteousness and dignity are far gone conceptions in this day and age, without God serving as a greater force of fear to instil piety and discipline. But without greater insight to serve the psychological needs of the masses, depravity has seeded itself throughout the modern generations.


>how does it read?

[Anonymous No.20744496]

>>20740942
Fellow OC writer, lets meet up

[Anonymous No.20744549]

>>20743460
I like that idea, and it speaks to the primordial baseness of humanity when shit hits the fan. Keep at it.

[Anonymous No.20744553]

>>20741810
Always funny when a student tries to make it believable - they usually have a huge spike in marks and high level concepts that don't correlate to the mark they tried to fake because the mistakes that drop their mark aren't seen at that concept tier.

[Anonymous No.20744607]

>>20743703
Extrapolate. Whenever you introduce new information, extrapolate. What does this mean? It means thinking through all of the effects that something would have on your world and characters. A great way to see extrapolation in action is on 2b2t, where every tiny detail and balance patch, even down to the tiniest, most minute detail, gets exploited to oblivion. That damn server found a way to weaponize books in Minecraft. BOOKS.

Shadiversity has a great video on this concept here: https://youtu.be/0j0mkPEFVIU

While he was speaking in the context of fantasy world-building, extrapolating applies to all fiction, including contemporary and historical.

When you introduce new details about your world or characters, think through carefully how this would effect the dynamics of your story. If you follow these extrapolations to their natural conclusions, you'll have a lot more material to work with.

You don't have to make up a bunch of random story filler, just squeeze everything out of the details that are already there, and the rest of the story will come out. It takes discipline and thought to keep track of every narrative thread in a given story, and you might need to practice note-taking and research skills to get a solid, convincing narrative out of your short bones of a story.

[Anonymous No.20744620]

>>20744159
This is natural selection are work bros, let it happen.

This is a great idea! You should go for it!

[Anonymous No.20744648]

I'm getting fuck all for traction on my webnovel anymore. Shit's fucked bros. Never hit rising stars, never hit highest rated.

Going to have to start something new.

[Anonymous No.20744726]

>>20739403
Quantum nanobots.

[Anonymous No.20744752]

>>20744080
Unless you're a woke woman of color right now, fuhgeddaboutit. That said maybe lightning strikes but don't bet your house on it.

[Anonymous No.20744820]

>>20744488
>Climate change
lol lmao. great way to make sure your book will fall into obscurity.

[Anonymous No.20744863]

>>20744820
>climate change
and not the schizo tier message i had put in

thanks

[Anonymous No.20745058]

Anyone here make a living off writing? What university degree did you do beforehand?

[Anonymous No.20745067]

>>20745058
I make a living off of writing software for which I got a computer science degree

[Anonymous No.20745068]

How viable would you say it is for (non-erotic I should specify) furshit with a mix of anthro and human characters to gain traction with a non-furry audience?

[Anonymous No.20745077]

New thread when?

[Anonymous No.20745120]

>>20745068
the wandering inn is pretty big and has tons of anthro and lizard characters.
though it doesn't read like furry shit. if regular readers can tell you're speaking to the furry audience, then that will probably be offputting to them.

TLDR its fine as long it doesn't read like fetish shit.

[Anonymous No.20745143]

>>20745077
Make it

[Anonymous No.20745235]

>>20743080
I’ve been seriously misled about Call of the Crocodile by some people here. This is supposed to be bad? This sounds awesome. Confirms my suspicions that everyone saying “Call of the Crocodile is bad” must just be jealous of F Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20745239]

>>20745120
Yeah that's what I kind of had in mind, something written for a general audience first with the added bonus that maybe I can throw it up on FA or something to get more eyes on it.

[Anonymous No.20745255]

>>20743080
>tfw no one does write ups on my book
I seriously gotta overtake Gardner

[Anonymous No.20745341]

>>20745235
Go away Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20745351]

>>20745077
no. just let it die once and for all. it's time

[Anonymous No.20745503]

>>20741557
Reviewfag and Boswell are literally two different people in two different countries, Frank. No need to get upset.

[Anonymous No.20745519]

>>20745235
The premise is fine it's the execution that's horrendous

[Anonymous No.20745786]

It'll be up when I get home

[Anonymous No.20745806]

How small is usually a story; in terms of number of words and/or in pages?
I ask this because I'm currently doing an editorial work (mostly out of passion) of a story, which has several unfinished versions. And so I worry that the story I'm working on is too short.
As is, and with only necessary revisions and edits, the compiled story could have 55-56 and over 36 thousand words; this being a somewhat conservative estimation.

[Anonymous No.20745868]

>>20745351
This. And make the next one a Gardner edition for the lulz.

[Anonymous No.20745872]

My novel outline so far:
>Plane crashes on island with only three survivors, two guys, and one girl
>Everything going well until girl starts sleeping with other guy, this pisses off the other guy who feels like he is pulling more of his weight to help around while the other two have it easier
>Guy decides to murder other guy, makes a convincing lie how he was stalked by some sort of "monster" in the woods while out looking for stuff
>Girl believes him, eventually other people show up, they find out how their plane crashed because nuclear war happened, guy has to keep up the ruse of the "monster" existing by murdering, one or two people who came with new group

I'm stumped on where to take it after new group show up and what kind of conflict I can introduce ending is going to be guy who convinced people there was a monster on the island realizing he was the monster all along

[Anonymous No.20745888]

>>20745868
Fuck off Gardner.

[Anonymous No.20745899]

>>20745503
Sure, Boswell.

[Anonymous No.20745922]

>>20742830
I think the concept of "shitty first draft" is alright as well. Also kek stephen king... Learn how to write from a guy who writes dreadful schlock. Thanks for your service bro.

Another spicy take: Strunk and White is overrated.

[Anonymous No.20745975]

>>20745872
>guy who convinced people there was a monster on the island realizing he was the monster all along
Kind of a pedestrian conclusion. Surprise me instead. What's the protag's own primary conflict? Everything needs to head towards some kind of resolution on that.

[Anonymous No.20746000]

>>20745872
One of the new group catches him out and starts committing his own monster murders because he's a psycho and loves it. So now there are two murderers pretending to be the monster and the conflict is really between the two of them while everyone else still thinks there's a monster.