Books about male self esteem?

[Anonymous No.19928659]

I have always had a very low opinion of myself. I constantly scrutinize details about my personality and appearance. I'm not that ugly, my cock is somewhat large, I'm not a short little manlet, I used to be kind of fat but I work out and jog now so that's not really an issue. That said I am always asking myself questions like
>do I look weird right now?
>what should I do with my hands?
>did I really just say that?
>why can't I be normal?
Needless to say I'm uncomfortable around girls and dread new social situations. Are there any books that could help me get out of this frame of mind?

[Anonymous No.19928694]

>>19928659
Self therapy by Jay Earely

Six pillars of self esteem

Psychocybernetics

[Anonymous No.19928713]

>>19928659
The Ego and the Id

[Anonymous No.19928718]

Read a book about CBT
also get an escort maybe idk

[Anonymous No.19928746]

>>19928694
These look good, thanks.
>>19928713
It's short so I'll read it too.
>>19928718
I've considered it but I have been able to get laid "normally" before. Being mostly sexless is a factor, but it's deeper than that.

[Anonymous No.19928767]

This sounds like something you ate. Eat more fruit and nuts and feel the power of not giving fucks.

[Anonymous No.19928786]

>>19928659
I don't really get why people ask for life advice here. It's like asking a bunch of homeless people for investment strategies.

[Anonymous No.19928878]

>>19928786
Because I bet there are lots of people who feel/felt similarly to me and that maybe someone read something helpful and want to share.

[Anonymous No.19928982]

>>19928659
>>19928694
>>19928713
>>19928718
>>19928746
no book is going to help you
this is solved by real world feedback denying your thoughts. If there is none then it mean your thoughts are correct.

[Anonymous No.19929034]

Is it even possible to meaningfully improve your self esteem past a certain age, or do you eventually reach a point where you're just stuck the way you are?

[Anonymous No.19929042]

>>19928659
You just need to learn to give less fucks. Just read picrel (esp. the parts on Diogenes) and the Enchiridion (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/45109))

[Anonymous No.19929053]

>>19929034
Your personality is pretty much set in stone at 18, unless you experience something extraordinarily traumatic.

[Anonymous No.19929054]

Also I remember overthinking a lot too back when I used to wank every day, been much more confident ever since I gave up porn and compulsive wanking. Good that you're working out, keep going strong.

[Anonymous No.19929062]

>>19928659
Facts don't change beliefs

[Anonymous No.19929183]

>>19929053
I was a neet until 22, and a virgin until 23. Stopped working for minimum wage and started a proper career at 26. 18 is not the cut off point at all, if there was one, I’d say 25, or maybe 30ish.

Books won’t help OP, you just have to start doing things you’re proud of. You have no self confidence probably because you haven’t done much to be confident about. You can’t trick yourself into thinking you’re amazing, when you’re not. Start doing things you’re happy about and the positive effects will snowball along with it.

[Anonymous No.19929227]

>>19928659
I used to feel a similar way. Weird solution but doing drugs, particularly cocaine, molly and adderall, and drinking helped me overcome this kind of mindset by lowering my inhibitions, letting me live in the moment in a social setting and not be autistic. From there I've found that I've been able to build off of that in a healthier way and things are bretty gud now. Books or other art did not really help me in this regard. Also I think it's important to have friends who are actually social and will want to go out engage with others

[Anonymous No.19929255]

>>19928659
you think about the wrong things. Think about your skills and teach yourself as many everyday skills you can get your hands on. Cooking, martial arts, painting, you name it. If you have developed some expertise in a few hobbies like that your self esteem will skyrocket. The only reason you think so superficial about yourself is because you lack other skills to find self esteem in.

[Anonymous No.19929523]

>>19929183
he said set in stone for your personality, not your career or virginity status

[Anonymous No.19929534]

>>19929227
I guess im fucked then
it's not fair to think there are literal solutions out there that can save my life but the government bans them because I dunno, I guess someone has to be on the bottom of reality
there really is a conspiracy to ruin your life

[Anonymous No.19929682]

>>19929534
? I'll admit obtaining drugs can sometimes be a pain in the ass if you don't know anyone, but it's far from impossible. Still, drinking is legal unless you're underage and very fun and helpful for autists like me. You're gonna have to actually talk to people to get drugs though, go to a nightclub or join a discord for your city or something. Or deepweb if you're desperate but I don't know anything about that

[Anonymous No.19929696]

>>19929227

>overcomes low self-esteem by doing scummy party drugs that, if he were a right-thinking person, would cause him to have low self-esteeem: "Huh, I'm a druggie piece of shit."

[Anonymous No.19929808]

That is a normal frame of mind. There is nothing to worry about and everything is as it should be.

[Anonymous No.19929924]

>>19929808
I don't think it's normal, or at the very least it's not healthy, to be devoid of confidence in yourself and your abilities.

[Anonymous No.19929930]

>>19928659
Nope.

[Anonymous No.19931149]

>>19928659
it's ok and fairly commonplace to have a low opion of oneself. obsessing over shit is the way you are, some minds are just particularly cunted. just focus on the good things bud, before you know it life'll be over

[Anonymous No.19931173]

>>19931149
remember how skewed our perceptions are; because of social media and pop culture...etc.
please understand that being some kind of chad is a ridiculous narcississtic, naive idea implanted into your head by the surrounding hypersexualised, insincere and divorced from reality culture. it's all fake.

[Anonymous No.19932111]

>>19931173
maybe one upon a time it was divorced from reality but it is reality now

[Anonymous No.19932192]

>>19928659
Sunshine, meat, no caffeine or alcohol, and focus on a meaningful activity where you can enter a state of flow and achieve real-world results (e.g. something that makes money, or at least something that isn't seen as spergy or low-status)
And leave this place forever.

[Anonymous No.19932215]

>>19928659
>male self-esteem
We have classic philosophy anon, we don't need that.

[Anonymous No.19932237]

>>19928659
Read a book on masculinity. Real masculinity not nu age bullshit. You feel like this because you have been lied to and deceived away from your masculinity. Anyone saying any different doesn't know what they're talking about and is most likely a woman or another feminist male of our cucked age. You are biologically designed to be in your masculine and when you are in your feminine (like you are now) you turn into a weak, needy, wimp. The powers push you away from it because it keeps you a slave, keeps you subservient, a good cattle that goes to work. Once you embrace your fucking right you will experience a drive, and purpose like you haven't felt in years maybe at all. It is like the you that laid dormant, the real you, is awakened. Nothing is more powerful than masculine energy. Women and men not in their masculine will have to kneel.

[Anonymous No.19932241]

>>19929924
He posted a snake for a reason.

[Anonymous No.19932665]

>>19932237
This

[Anonymous No.19932679]

>>19932237
What is masculine energy? What kind of energy is it? Sounds incoherent to me.

[Anonymous No.19932713]

>>19928659
Even the best books that you read again and again won't work unless you practice it. Honestly, as someone who struggled with all the same issues, you pretty much just have to put yourself in uncomfortable situations. Think about it this way: you are already uncomfortable. And it is a discomfort that isn't helping you grow. May as well go out and embarrass yourself and face rejection because the feedback will only help you. At a certain point I stopped caring about small embarrassments and rejection. The problem you have now is your mind is going wild. You imagine the worst case scenarios. Truth is you aren't the main character and no one is looking at you. No one will remember the dumb shit you did in front of them. They are too self-absorbed.

Anxiety and insecurity is so common these days, that once you start building a genuine confidence you become like a kind of god.

[Anonymous No.19932875]

>>19928659
personality > face > height > weight > money

[Anonymous No.19932904]

>>19928659
There's a cheater shortcut. You can just ask the person if they think you do weird things.
I had female friends at work, some even went to bar night, so if the question is too tough, wait until you've both had a few drinks. If you have no prospects with the woman then there's no reason not to ask because you don't care if she's not going to fuck you.

[Anonymous No.19933392]

>>19928786
where else would you ask? you don't ask chads about this because they can't relate, they will just tell you to be yourself or similar advice, whereas a fellow autist might be able to share stuff that has helped him that will actually be useful to you. Stop to think for a second, retard.

[Anonymous No.19933404]

When I Say No I Feel Guilty

[Anonymous No.19933410]

>>19932904
>caring about what women think
Ngmi

[Anonymous No.19933422]

>>19932679
Read way of the superior man to start to understand

[Anonymous No.19933424]

>>19932679
Shiva energy

[Anonymous No.19933438]

>>19933422
Nah, I don't want to read some opaque bullshit. If you can't articulate it using ordinary language, then don't speak about it.

[Anonymous No.19933455]

>>19933438
Keep making excuses then, I don't care. Nothing is opaque about the book and I already somewhat articulated it.

[Anonymous No.19933516]

>>19931173
Yeah, well. Ive come to realize that my situation was skewed and that my desires would’ve been fulfilled if I had changed my physical location earlier and studied abroad. Now Im stuck with a sense of lost time and missed opportunities that I proved myself I was able to achieve when I spend 1 year doing so. Now my blood boils with rage over some other peoples chances to have carefree fun while I had to put on some effort. That I hate.

[Anonymous No.19933535]

>>19933424
Shiva - THAT WHICH IS NOT - embodies none and all aspects of existence, thus both the male and female aspect, Ardhanarishvara. Shiva cannot be limited to masculine energy!

[Anonymous No.19933544]

>>19932237
It's not masculine energy it's "master" energy, or whatever other word fits. You call it masculine energy because you like the word. You call feminine energy what you don't like so as to disassociate yourself from it. It's all just your mental associations at work. Semantics, personal semantic choices.

[Anonymous No.19933548]

>>19933410
You're ngmi.

[Anonymous No.19933600]

>>19929183
>Start doing things you’re happy about and the positive effects will snowball along with it.
This, I learnt things like cooking and sharpening and maintening knives. I also started boxing recently. I was a virgin retard who played videogames all day and read occasionally all throughout my teenage years and I got sick of that.

[Anonymous No.19933663]

>>19933535
I guess you're right. But he is also the lingam.