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/lit/ - Literature

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19008721 No.19008721 [Reply] [Original]

Advice on writing like this? Good choice of words, nice analogies, tight and compact, sprinkled with good humour.

>> No.19008727

>>19008721
Women can be funny sometimes. Huh.

>> No.19008753

>>19008721
Edit your writing. If you naturally write jokes include that humor but refine it several times until the delivery is good. Some style comes naturally, but in editing you are consciously evaluating the utility of your words, sentences, paragraphs, pacing and literary devices. So don't expect to just naturally always write this way especially if you arent feeling funny one day. Just make a list of elements you need each paragraph and see if theyre there.

>> No.19008761

>>19008727
How do you know it's a woman?

>> No.19008767

>>19008761
Because only women would make up such a retarded excuse

>> No.19008777

>>19008721
>Colby College is a small liberal arts college consistently ranked among the top colleges and universities in the nation

>Advice on writing like this?
Step 1: Don't be a STEMfag.

>> No.19008778

>>19008721
That's a dragonfly

>> No.19008795

>>19008721
I think if you just try to write like this more often like >>19008753 said, it'll become natural to you. I'm pretty sure that person is a funny texter and got practice from there

>> No.19008860

>vassal of horror
what does that even mean?
Cambridge dictionary describes vassal as ''a man who agreed to fight for a king or lord in exchange for land to live on''

>> No.19008867

>>19008860
horror is king and the bug was fighting in its honor

>> No.19008879

>>19008860
are you fucking retarded?

>> No.19008889

>>19008860
Filtered by a damn email, picture me giving you mad side-eye right now, anon.

>> No.19008920

>>19008889
>simulated social shaming
this isn't facebook. go back.

>> No.19008947

>>19008920
>has reading comprehension of a toddler
>nevertheless believes he is the arbiter of who is allowed to post on /lit/

>> No.19008958

>>19008947
>believes he is the arbiter of who is allowed to post on /lit/
most people would agree that some cocksucker goading people into becoming an indentured slave for a fake degree is not welcome here

>> No.19008963

>>19008867
>horror is king and the bug was fighting in its honor
How am I supposed to know horror is supposed to represent king? The two concepts arent even remotely similar.
Also, I still don't get it

>> No.19008972

>>19008963
clearly the OP wrote that unfunny email expecting epic reddit points and is now posthoc giving it a meaning he never intended

>> No.19008989

>>19008860
I think they meant vessel of horror but got filtered by the homophone. I've noticed this happen a lot in that style of zoomer humor where the joke is just them writing verbosely, they always use the wrong word at least somewhere.

>> No.19008997

>>19008767
It's probably not an excuse, it's true.

>> No.19009016

>>19008860
Did you not learn the word vassal in school? Genuinely curious, I mean no disrespect

>> No.19009051

>that retarded comma splice at the end
god I want to go back to the 20th century so bad

>> No.19009117

>>19009051
there is no comma splice

>> No.19009121

>>19009051
Comma splices arent real semicolonfag, take your meds

>> No.19009138

>>19009117
Respectfully is followed by a name not a new statement. It's a comma splice.

>> No.19009147

>>19008860
here's a secret. The words you use dont have to make sense if the sound of them fits the context/line. People will do their own legwork by making up interpretations like the retards replying to your post

>> No.19009323

>>19009016
no

>> No.19009335

>>19008721
this is fucking childish womanly ass writing

get some taste OP

>> No.19009346

>>19008860
The bug has agreed to fight for Lord Horror in exchange for land to live on.

>> No.19009488

>>19009346
Fight against the girl
And the land is the girl's room

>> No.19009813

>>19008860
why /lit/ is the lowest iq board. I think its got to do with complexes, other people just dont care and go to some mindless boards that are still entertaining in its own way

>> No.19010080

>>19008767
Heh you've never heard my excuses

>> No.19010215
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19010215

the absolute state of zoomer grammar

>> No.19010314

>>19010215
There is no grammar mistakes. It's all spelling mistakes. Most likely they are too lazy to write properly but can when absolutely needed.

>> No.19010330

IV a bottle of onions

>> No.19010351

>>19010215
>acomidate
why are Americans like this?
>>19010314
I imagined this but I've seen the same mistakes in more formal contexts.

>> No.19010361

>>19008727
>>19008767
Based and red pilled
Only women and onions boys would write like that

>> No.19010368

>>19008721
Don't overdo it with this style, otherwise you come off as a faggy douche.

>> No.19010369

>>19010314
but those spelling mistakes are not due to laziness
>acomidate
>benifit
>tutering

>> No.19010409

>>19008879
>>19008889
Kek

>> No.19010431

>>19008860
it doesn't need to be meant literally to make sense; that's not how language works.

>> No.19010448

>>19008989
This is very plausible but vassal as in "someone who acts in service of (horror)" isn't completely off target. Maybe it was intentional. I think the email is a bit annoying and I would have called for a more serious tone had I been her professor but I assume this would have made me jobless in one way or the other, or got me into jail if she decided to #metoo in revenge.

>> No.19010458
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19010458

>>19008721
>waterville

>> No.19010498

>>19010448
>I would have called for a more serious tone
yeah that's what I thought as well, but I'm just going to assume that the person wouldn't have written it this way if the the professor wasn't the type of person to not mind something like that

>> No.19010503

>>19008721
>Colby
Nice of your parents to spend $60k a year so you can get fucked in the back of your Jetta and piss yourself on mushrooms at Chickenfest.

>> No.19010561

>>19010503
Tfw not born rich

>> No.19010759

>>19010561
Its pretty stressful desu.
She had a perfect pussy though.

>> No.19010785
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19010785

>>19010759
>Its pretty stressful desu.

>> No.19010810

>>19008721
>Good choice of words, nice analogies, tight and compact, sprinkled with good humour.
is this a joke?
>literally one block paragraph
>"I will be a little late... I am not sure how late" contradiction
>"when it flies its wings" terrible grammar
>"makes this awful whirring noise like some vassal of horror" senseless similie
>"locked in a stalemate and I am at every disadvantage" contradiction
>"Respectfully, I am in tears" wrong grammar again
>screenshot is taken by the student
this is worse than 9gag

>> No.19010815

>>19008721
Simple, declarative sentences, lots of sensory details, establish the conceit, punchline, tag tag tag and get out of there, don't drag it out

>> No.19010819

>>19008721
www.reddit.com/r/writingadvice/

>> No.19010924

>>19009121
>>19009117
Since when? I'm not a prescriptionist at least when it comes to style or vocab, but I write as I speak, and I often find myself writing hella independent clauses, and I think commas in the place of ; or / would end up looking retarded.

>> No.19011123

>>19008860
I read is as vessel until you pointed it out and pehaps that it what she intended, but vassal makes it better, as if it were a lieutenant of Satan. Horror becomes a proper noun, deified and crowned, with subjects.

>> No.19011147

>>19010448
Joyless post, art should be rewarded, the minutiae of minutes does not matter in comparison to the creative spark.

>> No.19011158

>>19010924
As rules go it just doesnt really matter and almost nobody cares anymore, similar to starting a sentence with and or but

>> No.19011160

>>19010810
t. ESL projecting his textbooks without sense or feeling for a language and its devices.

>> No.19011442

>>19008989
>>19010448
pretty sure its meant as vessel and that's how most would read it as especially consider the context before, it definitely can be vassal but makes no since with the context and clearly an accident. Would've been based if this person acknowledged the two words and made a comment or reference to the two homophones making us unsure if its either one as they both can fit if the right context is given.

>> No.19011715

>>19010448
Is this a right winger's wet dream of what academia is like?

>> No.19011726

>>19010815
You just analysed it, didn't say how to replicate

>> No.19011733

>>19011160
This.

>> No.19011741

>>19010431
ESL here. What does this mean?
>>19009147 is this anon right then? It just needs to sound good?

>> No.19012231

>>19008860
>>19008963
Jesus, fuck off

>> No.19012899

>>19011741
It's what Shakespeare did.

>> No.19012920

>>19011741
>It just needs to sound good?
There is still some secret sauce to make it work. You need to be pretty good to pull it off. A true master of the language owns it. Everyone else needs to learn how to follow along.

>> No.19012932

t. Kafka (posthumously)

>> No.19014197

>>19012231
no u

>> No.19014230

how Kafkaesque