Write What's On Your Mind

[Anonymous No.18760616]

[Anonymous No.18760636]

Bitterfly :3

[Anonymous No.18760645]

What use are memories? The second the moment is over it translates into a memory and once it is a memory it is useless. I am not content with memories, I must keep exploring and gaining new experiences.

[Anonymous No.18760653]

>>18760616
I have no friends. I have nowhere to go. I just sit in my room all day and listen to my family yell.

[Anonymous No.18760874]

120 pages into my novel now. Hope everyone else working on a creative project has good luck.
It feels kinda funky when you type a few sentences and whoops there goes an hour.

[Anonymous No.18760877]

Christianity is extremely hard and extremely rewarding. I am glad Im back, even though its hard, because it is the one thing in my life besides the love of my family and friends that has ever felt genuine to me.

[Anonymous No.18760879]

Chris Chan is proof there is no God

[Anonymous No.18760922]

>>18760616
Why would you throw anyone as a Saiyan? It's frequently shown to have no effect, even when whole mountain ranges are destroyed.

[Anonymous No.18760983]

The world is soaked in the supernatural and the miraculous and the Divine. If you can't feel it, you're just not pulling your head up enough. Our world is not disenchanted, it's distracted. If you go looking for God, you'll find Him. If you go looking for fairies, or ghosts, or the lesser gods, or other strange creatures, you'll find them, too. We have created a daily life that blots them out, but they're all still out there, for those who care to seek.

[Anonymous No.18760987]

>>18760874
yo you should post that

[Anonymous No.18761165]

>>18760987
Every once in a while I'll do a little snapshot to try to entertain fellow lit users. I think at 150 I'll do another one since that'll be my planned halfway point.

[Anonymous No.18761220]

>learning a course on a job which i wouldnt even want to do, just to put something to CV to increase my chances in job hunt
it sometimes be like that

[Anonymous No.18761226]

>>18761220
How fucked am I? I'm going to look for a job soon.

[Anonymous No.18761228]

>>18761226
not that fucked, depending on what you are looking for

[Anonymous No.18761235]

>>18760983
schizo pilled

[Anonymous No.18761239]

>>18761226
I dont know your case but i'm 29 neet with almost 3 years of a job gap.

[Anonymous No.18761243]

>>18761235
It's all real, friend. Go looking. You'll find it!

[Anonymous No.18761250]

>>18761243
yeah if i ever wanna become a homeless crazy, I'll try going to look for "it"

[Anonymous No.18761255]

>>18760983
Matthew 19:12!

[Anonymous No.18761302]

How many times have I cum today?
What makes this, the 4th time? I don't remember.
Good grief...
I want to feel the touch of a hentai character's ass flesh

[Anonymous No.18761410]

I went out for the first time in like half a year. My friend got too drunk and passed out on one couch . so I'm chilling watching TV drinking, and he just stood up and pissed on his own end table/floor and played back down straight up. I don't know what to do

[Anonymous No.18761414]

>>18760616
I thought I had a 3-day ban for racism, but it was just a 1 day #GodLovesMe

[Anonymous No.18761694]

I'm thinking of leaving this place for somewhere Christian. I don't care if I'll have to lie about being Christian, I think I need to do something like that.
4chan doesn't work anymore now that everyone knows about it. I want a forum with moderation that bans agitators. Lots of people here are also underage and I think pseudonymity instead of anonymity helps sort the retarded children. I often wished everyone used a trip so I could filter individual shitters, so I think I just want a forum or some other pseudonymous environment.
I hope the conservative environment will also filter pornography and shitty moeblob anime. I'm tired of that.
Except the part about believing in God I think I just want to go somewhere that is filled with Christians but isn't fucking Gab or some other stupid website for /pol/faggots.
It's not like I can talk about the things I'm interested in here, so at least I get a more pleasant environment.
It's going to be difficult to find a good place but I'm so fucking tired of this site and reddit or other social media are pervaded by the same atmosphere even if more PC.
>>18760983
based and mysticpilled

[Anonymous No.18761742]

>>18761694
this is, and will likely remain, the best place for honest, unfiltered expression on the web, though I don't expect it to live very long at this point. good luck finding something better on forums or whatever. if you think tripfags are bad, wait till you discover what kind of narcissistic attention whores populate those places, and entire cliques of them. the only good forums are dedicated to some particular niche topic. or there are a couple out there that are almost unmoderated and much like 4chan in some respects, but it doesn't seem like you'd be into that.

what are the things you're interested in that you're unable to discuss here?

[Anonymous No.18761773]

>>18761742
>what are the things you're interested in that you're unable to discuss here?
literature

[Anonymous No.18761775]

I watched this Kitano movie the other day with a cute Polish girl the other day. It was really nice, and I'm really interested in her. Beyond that, the movie was actually fucking amazing. I'm not a film buff at all, or versed in any way with the visual arts but I was just completely taken in by it. I don't want to get too faggy and highbrow about it, but Kitano strikes me as a genuine master of his form, and as an aspiring author I grew to develop this admiration-bordering-kinship with him for the way he comes at his craft. My impression of the mostly plotless work was the same I get from reading Joyce, whose work I see as an expression of nothing but the mastery of form. Plot, characters, resolution – none of that shit ultimately matters to me, and I felt that Kitano was coming from the exact same philosophy.

There's this one scene in Fireworks where one of the characters opens a box of art supplies, and it is literally burned into my brain. The cut starts with a closed box, which is opened with a straight razor. As he opens the box, we see a smaller white box, upon which falls a tiny little shred of cardboard. It was just fucking perfect. This in itself honestly took my breath away. The white box is then removed, and we transition visually from these nested boxes to brushes packed in brown paper. Slowly the camera pans out, revealing the character's wrinkled linen, pinstripe pyjamas, then the crux of the scene is the emergence of a pile of warped driftwood sitting in a pile at the corner of the room. It's impossible to describe, and there's no way I could do it justice in just a couple thousand characters of text, but it was just a complete mastery of the aesthetics of geometry in motion.

The entire movie, for the most part, was just these fucking gorgeous set pieces interspersed with bizarre violence and these little touches of emotional poignancy. It felt like reading Gravity's Rainbow for the first time again. It's been a while since I've had my eyes opened like that, and I'm really grateful for it.

I'm convinced this girl is a keeper, by the way. We've never met so there are a bunch of blanks to be filled in, but I just have a really, really good feeling about it, and my gut is rarely wrong. Feels good, bros.

[Anonymous No.18761777]

>>18761410
Tie his shoes together

[Anonymous No.18761817]

my life is snot. dump it.

[Anonymous No.18761821]

>>18761775
Gonna watch that movie later. Thank you and good luck.

[Anonymous No.18761894]

>>18761821
Thanks anon! Definitely check it out if it seems up your alley. It's a very particular kind of film, but I genuinely enjoyed the ever living fuck out of it.

[Stephen from Death Grips No.18761904]

>>18760879
I think WW1 and WW2 is proof enough

[Anonymous No.18761935]

>>18761742
>this is, and will likely remain, the best place for honest, unfiltered expression on the web
No. I don't believe it anymore. I don't want "unfiltered expression". I don't want to talk to kindergartners. I'm getting really fucking tired of this fucking "free speech" shit. Nobody really gives a fuck about free speech anyway, it's all just an excuse to post porn and degrade the level of discussion as much as possible and say nigger and spew "yeah it was the JEWS!!!" for no other reason than the high of spewing edgy shit in a safe place with no accountability. All you fags are sheep IRL, you would never say this IRL because your free speech zone is just a playground for cowards. This is exactly why trannies are taken more seriously than you. This site is turning me authoritarian and it's making me hate anonymity and this cowardly act under the excuse of deidentification. I am so fucking tired of this puerile American outlook on "freedom", you don't deserve it, you are irresponsible and that's why it's being taken from you. I hate the fucking memes and the porn spam and the retarded "no u" takes and pseud fart sniffing pervading this site and any other site about "freedom".
At the same time I hate leftists so all I'm left with is looking for some sort of conservative space that expects people to have self-control and decency. I'm probably just going to find deranged boomers and tradlarpers who one-up each other with the bible but I don't care. As long as I take a break from bugman shit like anime and camwhores and youtubers and all this stupid fucking gay zoomer shit for cereal eating cattle faggots I'm going to feel better.

[Anonymous No.18761943]

>>18761935
Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out!

[Anonymous No.18761954]

>>18761935
It's time to leave man. I had the same realisation a couple of months ago and just closed the tab and felt zero urge to revisit for like half a year. But then my city went into lockdown so I got bored and came back. You'll never truly be able to leave, but you don't have to stay.

[Anonymous No.18761958]

I'm in my early 30s and I'm so morally, intellectually, and motivationally spooked out. There's nothing left in the tank.

It took me many years after university to get a good office job because I'm an ugly autist that found it hard to bs interviews without experience. Now that I've got experience, I'm seeing how banal and normiecentric the workplace is. I doubt my own promotion prospects past the lower middle manager range. Networking is pushed to an extreme degree in my large company. Doing work with a tangible end product is very low status.

After some prior bad experiences, I thought I had learnt how to sufficiently fake being a normie but I have this horrific female manager who is the most generic normie imaginable, and who thinks there is something horrifically wrong with me for not spending half of every meeting talking about holidays or my family or generic normieshit. With people like this in charge, and the entire HR apparatus backing her up, I can see why autism is perceived to be so widespread.

Of course, the male escape hatch from the above would be if I was a poshclone or ladbantzclone or cheekychappyclone. But I'm none of those and never will be.

Homeworking due to covid has been a large benefit to life, and I've saved lots of money because of it, and avoided countless awkward normie encounters and horrendous hours commuting or in scatterbrained open offices. I pray for new variants.

I have had no friends or social experiences since school, no female attention ever, and I'm an ugly beta male. "Just lifting bro" did nothing. My entire adult life has been a total social blank. I did not experience one drop of "the university experience" while at university. I disliked my subject, so it was even an intellectual blank.

I am not a motivated person. My main hobbies for the past 7 years have been walking around or driving outside, while listening to podcasts, and then binging on junk food and coffee while telling myself I'll start my real life tomorrow by working hard on stuff and having productive hobbies.

I used to read a lot of novels, and still read some amount, but it's a consumercuck hobby. I forget practically everything I read and I don't think I could have an extended conversation about anything. I don't think it's an intelligence issue. I did well in education up until the last few years of university, where my motivation plummeted due to being incelblackpilled. I simply have no major interests. I exercise regularly but I'm thankfully not spooked enough to think this is meaningful.

[Anonymous No.18761960]

>>18761958

My current main aspiration is to muster the motivation to learn programming so I can do productive stuff in my free time. I also want to continue saving to invest money in stonks and crypto. I will have to either fake being happy at work or try to get an autism diagnosis.

I fully understand that I have a life on European Extreme mode because I'm an ugly male, with women and Chads getting everything handed to them. I fully understand that normies know I'm not one of them after one minute of discussion.

I fully understand that progressivism will continue to win and there's nothing left to do except watch.

I'm not deluded enough to rationalise away any of the above issues with spiritualism, religion, metaphysics, etc.

[Anonymous No.18761989]

>>18761960
Just save up and get plastic surgery if appearance is bothering you that much.

[Anonymous No.18762007]

>>18761954
Same for me, I'm only here again because of the lockdown. Things were already going to shit nine years ago but now it's just plain insufferable.
Public internet is fucking shit now, giving the internet to normalfaggots and children was a disaster

[Anonymous No.18762067]

>>18761958
>I forget practically everything I read
I hate this too.
>>18761960
>My current main aspiration is to muster the motivation to learn programming so I can do productive stuff in my free time.
Depending on what you want to do, this may be fairly easy, just put in the work.. and no matter how bad of a board it is, /g/'s /sqt/, /wdg/ and later /dpt/ or even /fglt/ are there for you.

[Anonymous No.18762073]

>>18761777
this. digits confirm

[Anonymous No.18762120]

Meditation. A declined inappropriate offer to help a sister. Sponginess. As a human prerogative. Your nice time with a past love in a field, if it's been tainted. A rat. A nice time on a bench. Indian food. Classic social interaction. Her getting ready for bed. My lying there. Breathing. Thinking. Not thinking. The empty walls. The night. The lampposts. Meta talk about dates. My rose. Not much. Having little to say. Medicine. That she has good feedback. That she's still beautiful. That it's okay to have unclear paths. Maybe. Talking at her. Degeneracy. In my friends and hers. In me. Alcohol. Her asking me if she treats me okay. Me saying yes, that she's set expectations clearly. That that hurts but is truthful. What else could I say?

[Anonymous No.18762128]

>>18761935
okay, whatever floats your boat anon

[Anonymous No.18762142]

It's really astounding to see one's life get progressively worse as the years go by, with no improvement or respite along the way, especially since we've been conditioned to think that life gets better and the dark night is eventually followed by the rising of the sun and so on. The truth is for some people, I would even say for a great deal of people, there is no light. Their lives and deaths are conveniently ignored. Looking in the mirror is like seeing the deterioration of a terminally ill, or insane patient, or both. Better days are, of course, not coming, and there will be no point of comfort along the way.

[Anonymous No.18762147]

>>18761958
It's nice to read others posts that are only partially relatable. We are a similar age, and I can understand much of where you coming from, but in certain important respects I've avoided some of the worst of the things that have affected you, and your post made me grateful for that.
Either way, we'll all be dead before long, thank God. At least that's how I look at it

[Anonymous No.18762164]

I didn't think my life would be like this at 22.

[Anonymous No.18762175]

We're born like sailboats lost at sea: we blindly stare into the ocean's depth.

[Anonymous No.18762194]

>>18760616
I have decided to become a reddit atheist. I cant deal with god and gnosticism and le brahman and whatever else anymore

[Anonymous No.18762284]

why flesh is life. why flesh is life

[Anonymous No.18762329]

Did you ever dread death? I used to. LOL

[Anonymous No.18762348]

pretty cold day for august and why they made bounty chocolate bar so small

[Anonymous No.18762456]

>>18760653
Get a job you bum

[Anonymous No.18762459]

>>18762456
Thanks.

[Anonymous No.18762465]

>>18762459
For what, giving you advise your dad should have given you?

[Anonymous No.18762469]

>>18762465
No, "iM Cured" GeT Job, Work it, make it. THankS.

[Anonymous No.18762478]

>>18762469
Okay stay put in your room then, that won't make your situation even worse.

[Anonymous No.18762496]

>>18762478
No, I'm getting a job, money cures.Salary is medicine.

[Anonymous No.18762508]

>>18762496
It's not about money you brainlet. It's about being able to hold down a job, meeting people on the job and making it that more realistic that you'll move out of a toxic home.
Your response shows me you're not nearly ready for that. If you think all a job is is money you're clueless.

[Anonymous No.18762522]

>>18762508
>meeting people on the job
thats the worst part

[Anonymous No.18762524]

>>18762508
Kek you say anon is clueless yet your thoughts have the depth of a child's. making assumptions about things you know nothing about. YWNBAW

[Anonymous No.18762532]

>>18762524
Love the seethe in this response. What would your advise for that anon be? Don't get a job and then what? Stay at home, feel like a leech who can't take care of himself?

>>18762522
Maybe, but you'll be more socialized than if you stick in your little room surrounded by yelling family.

[Anonymous No.18762551]

>>18762532
>What would your advise for that anon be?
My advice for you is to dilate and take your meds so you can been a good productive wagie. Kek.

[Anonymous No.18762586]

>>18762551
Someone has trannies on their mind.
Stay in that room anon, I'm sure you won't look back at regret when the years pass you by!

[Anonymous No.18762595]

>>18762586
>at regret

[Anonymous No.18762783]

im truly alone in this world and it doesnt care about me.

[Anonymous No.18762788]

>>18760616
I feel sad, lonely, and remorseful. I met my old friends in the city again after a while and had such a good time—I am ashamed to say that when I went back home two years ago for school I didn't put in much effort into keeping in touch with them, and stopped pursuing music production while the rest of them persisted in their art. When we were hanging out the other day they introduced me to two new friends they had made since I left, and one of them was very pretty and had a great smile. I am mildly simping for her, but could never date her in my current state.
As soon as I set foot in the city this week I became suddenly aware of the dreams that I had given up two years ago to lead a life of solitary study, and have felt extremely sad because of it. Having spent time with my friends and felt the warm glow of companionship, I feel even emptier knowing that I will go back home again and be swept into the mundane routine all over again. I don't want to go on.
It feels like something in me has gone out and will not return.

[Anonymous No.18762796]

>>18762783
well, yeah

[Anonymous No.18762822]

>>18762142
I think the key is to just take action in some way. If you can try to meet new people you should try it. When I was younger I would go up to strangers in clubs/bars and start conversations. Most of them didn't end up becoming long term friends, but a few did, and even though I've fallen out of touch with them due to my own shortcomings, I think my life has been richer for the people who have been in it. Try joining a dance or yoga class or some shit. I'm not in such a great place in life myself, and feeling at the bottom of a pit, but it's up to oneself to climb out.

[Anonymous No.18762835]

>>18760874
>>18761165
I remember you from /wg/. What happened to you?

[Anonymous No.18762836]

>>18762194
>What about God? If God is defined as some sort of transcendent reality, do you think God exists?
>[Laughs] Frankly, no. But there are so many different conceptions of God. Take, for example, the medieval Christian, Jewish and Islamic mystics. It's a very rich period from the 12th to the 15th centuries. They began to realize that in each of their traditions, it was impossible to say exactly who God was and what he wants and what he's doing. In fact, human intelligence has a certain limitation that keeps it from being able to embrace the infinite or the whole. Therefore, every one of our statements about God and the universe is tinged with a degree of ignorance. I would say that I am deeply moved by the thought of an unnameable mystery. If you then ask me, exactly which mystery are you then referring to? I can't answer. That's as far as I can go. But it's got its grip on me, for sure.

[Anonymous No.18762844]

>>18762836
I'm fine with that but sounds like a kantian noumenon type situation rather than god

[Anonymous No.18763166]

one is not enough. i will write THREE epic poems

[Anonymous No.18763238]

>>18763166
no you wont

[Anonymous No.18763269]

Found this post on /pol/ about gamergate. I never understood what's the big deal about GamerGate but this made it click for me.

A woman cheated on her boyfriend and fucked 5 guys, some of which were reviewing her shitty indie game.

He spilled the beans and everyone called out the reviewers for not mentioning the developer literally fucked them.

So a bunch of autists got together to see what other drama was there, and uncovered a shitload of collusion and favor trading for shilling of each other's games and organizations.

It would have ended there as "no fucking shit gaming journalism is just one big circlejerk of shilling" but they tried to cover it all up. The cover up was this massive lockstep "gamers are dead" campaign and making up a bunch of baloney to disguise what a bunch of jokes they are.

Then it kept growing and growing until it went mainstream. Celebrities chimed in, feminists went to the UN, federal investigations into harassment, etc. It got wildly out of control and redpilled a bunch video game playing losers about how the media works to control narratives. How Jews and feminists and blacks use the same tactics to be victims that can only be helped through more shekels, etc.

That redpilling led to a lot of new /pol/ members being born because people starting seeing the same tactics in political media and started asking questions. It turned out shitposting about controlled narrative and happenings is more fun than video games because they all suck now.

Then a bunch of stuff happened and Donald Trump is now the president.

[Anonymous No.18763273]

>>18763269
Fro here https://archive.4plebs.org/pol/thread/109251983/#q109255051

[Anonymous No.18763288]

>>18763269
Video games are for children.

[Anonymous No.18763413]

I should never talk. I somehow always manage to depress people with my words, and even worse, to influence their decisions.
Why do people take me so seriously. I'm just a sad loser. I should never talk.

[Anonymous No.18763428]

thus god cant undo death and damage incured by the fruit of knowledge, of life so long has now become so short.

we ve devolved from something to nothing. has this been planned too?
now life feels so large, it becomes completely meaningless to believe in anything except the musclework.

get it? it means nothing if it produces nothing. thus the planner too means nothing if it produces nothing.

the god. yes. if the god produces nothing but pain that has no end, then it shall means nothing.

but thus is the nature of perfection itself, because the entity you ve decided to rest your soul upon has only power but not you, and you continue to cease as you try so very hard only to be impressed by the tiniers... thus you continue to devolve and this devolution of yours eventually has none to be credited but you, and you only.

eventually humanity means nothing and so follow god itself, as the race it follows devolve in value and existence, it too cease to have existence... but perhaps to exist without meaning is the happiest of all, while to be finite as a living being is to be constantly living in need for meanings.

[Anonymous No.18763432]

>>18763269
No one gives a shit
Also, what he said >>18763288

[Anonymous No.18763455]

and as you continue to breed well... the son of god that becomes human thus only has human features to feel human, and by that mannerism, it seems divine existence cant go beyond physicality by a certain manner and only exist along with-

nvm. anyway what bothers? if the gift is enough we can stop all the games and give back. but i guess even the ants are not saved and the lord rolls and wait for judgement day while it lets life cease.

truly it is not the savior nor the healer
but merely the judge and prophet of the end. i guess that is to be expected.

[Anonymous No.18763465]

>>18763269
Games are gay but manchildren should left alone with their stuff. Normalfags just can't help themselves and deform everything.

[Anonymous No.18763486]

>>18763465
I don't think it was even about games. That's the same year I became aware of politics and media dishonesty but it was because of Crimea. For other people it was Zimmerman. Something was just up around that time

[Anonymous No.18763489]

I don't feel passionate for anything, which includes an inability to feel even moral indignation. If you butchered a bunch of children in front of me right now, I think I wouldn't react - not even with an edgy nihilistic glee. About the only thing I genuinely care right now is removing immediate disfomfort. Even long range planning became alien to me all of a sudden.

[Anonymous No.18763493]

>>18763465
>>18763432
>>18763288
>t. double digit IQ
It's not about games

[Anonymous No.18763511]

>>18763486
They accumulated enough power to start using it to curb dissent and forcefully dictate narratives. It wasn't just in America, Brexit was voted before Trump and the media was doing the same thing in the UK.

[Anonymous No.18763591]

>>18763489
Sounds like anhedonia and/or depersonalization.

[Anonymous No.18763603]

Posting this here since the people in the original thread are brain-dead:

>>>18756170
>What was Mary suffering from? Evil has masterfully subverted us and is hiding in plain sight: remember that Silent Hill is a place of phantasmagoria, it justifies and ostensibly explains itself by claiming that James has murdered his wife in the "real world", however, what if this is the very heart of its phantasmagoria? James murdered Mary in Silent Hill first, not as a temporal paradox, but as the super-temporal murder: James is a demon who manifests Silent Hill and lures Maria, the living, sexual one, from the "real world" into Silent Hill, where she is transmuted into Mary, the dead, castrated one. Mary is suffering from the murder itself, Maria is her superfluity, that which is "not of this world", that cannot be murdered and is now paradoxically released into the full quality of her vitality by being separated from the mortal Mary. The vulgar interpretation that James is a "real world" man trapped in Silent Hill becomes paradoxically true, Mary is consumed by James but the super-vital Maria consumes him, realigning their shared Phenomenal, Silent Hill, around her. >What is Silent Hill then? Sexuality stripped of its romantic crypto-oriental definitions, man and woman as complementary and so on, and laid bare, an exegesis only possible from its inside, only possible once one has misstepped into it and made ripples around one's self that hit and outlined its monstrous nature: man and woman are not made for each other, they are mutually exclusive. The James-Mary-Maria chain being exemplary of this, it is nothing but near-intrusion from an awful distance, violent too all parties and wanted by neither. James does not want Maria, Mary does not want James, James, in fact, does not want Mary either, finally, does Maria want James? No. What does Maria want, why did she follow James into Silent Hill, into sex? Exactly. This is the mystery perfectly mirroring the question of what James actually wants, it is obviously not Maria, since he murdered her, and it is obviously not the residue of Mary. Perhaps both man and woman realize their predicament, that once they stepped into Silent Hill they can no longer leave, that Silent Hill will indefinitely expand and follow them wherever they might go, so they choose to commit not quite suicide but sexual suicide: that the James-Mary-Maria chain is totally consensual, that both of them want to die as sexes, the finality of Maria being a kind of "soul" aborting itself from the "body" of sex.

[Anonymous No.18763605]

>>18763288
Ultra based.

[Anonymous No.18763627]

>>18763493
>>18763465
Videogames rule.
On another note, I'm starting to find my determination with writing seriously. The real pain is that I have no frame of reference for how to do things. I guess I could try and feel liberated by that, but I'm excited to go back to school and take some classes.

[Anonymous No.18763723]

I'm planning a book (well, more of a novella) and to be honest bros, I don't really care themes and stuff. I just want to write the textual version of a monster film.

[Anonymous No.18763829]

>>18763723
then write it

[Anonymous No.18763839]

sabr

[Anonymous No.18763933]

Bill Gates
Billgates
Bilgates
Bilgames

Holy shit

[Anonymous No.18764017]

RNGDA

[Anonymous No.18764205]

Pretty sure I have an inferiority complex which has been making my life miserable for years. How tf do I even deal with that?
I'm 21, I'm not supposed to be living like this. And yet this stupid complex prevents me from improving mentally and socially.

[Anonymous No.18764229]

>>18764205
go to a shrink
meditate
those are what helped me

[Anonymous No.18764338]

wondering if I can genuinely be helped by an atheist shrink
unrelated to>>18764229

[Anonymous No.18764369]

"Epicurus" (אפיקורוס) is a pejorative term for heretics who deny divine providence.

[Anonymous No.18764380]

Test

[Anonymous No.18764424]

>>18764380
welcome back

[Anonymous No.18764443]

>>18764338
Yes, but only superficially.

[Anonymous No.18764446]

>>18764205
How does it manifest itself?

[Anonymous No.18764464]

i reread some stuff i wrote about 6 months ago
its fucking awful, like not even worth reading past the third paragraph bad.

[Anonymous No.18764467]

>>18764443
desu I think I am the type of person who would be helped by therapy, but the question is if it is better to only seek oneness as a remedy. No one would say "oh you broke your knee, better pray", they'd tell you to go to the doctor. the question is whether shrinks are like other doctors or if the process is not analogous. If matters of the soul should always be referred to trust in the One only and nothing else.

[Anonymous No.18764484]

>>18764467
>If matters of the soul should always be referred to trust in the One only and nothing else.
This might well be very true, but consider that religion has utmost psychological importance as well, if you accept Jungian theses. It makes sense too, considering that mental health became a widespread problem only when religion lost its importance. As for myself, I know that a lot of my psychological problems simply disappeared when I seriously committed myself to religion.

[Anonymous No.18764632]

Sirs, what must I do to be saved?

[Anonymous No.18764643]

>>18764632
Forgive everyone.

[Anonymous No.18764654]

maybe the antinatalists were right
at least I know if I were offered the chance to do it all again I would think very hard about it
I guess I can't say the same for everyone else, though

[Anonymous No.18764665]

>>18764632
This
>>18764643

and never stop trying to get closer to God and your fellow man through repentance.

[Anonymous No.18764678]

>>18764643
literally this, live like Aljosha

[Anonymous No.18764694]

You're the only people who I can talk about literature and philosophy. I love you all /lit/fags, even if we call each other retards from time to time.

[Anonymous No.18764698]

>>18764643
is it ok to forgive someone but still not want to see them?

[Anonymous No.18764752]

I can't fucking relax. That's my fucking problem. I sit down, and I just can't stop thinking "Oh god I gotta do X while I have time". I wake up, and these same instrusive thoughts barrage my conscious.

I can't even fucking pick up my expensive gaming console controller anymore, I just think "Jesus Christ how fucking old are you, you could be doing X right now. And what the fuck is this shit game, I don't care about any of this, why is everything so complicated these days." This was me playing Minecraft earlier, upset that I forgot how to build redstone machines like I used to.

God fucking damn it, it's the weekend and I'm still thinking about work shit. There's just no end to it, I work hard to maintain a lifestyle I can't enjoy, this is some real clown world shit

[Anonymous No.18764764]

>>18764446
lack of communicative skills and high anxiety in social settings. Hiding it is no option, it seems like people can sense my autism even though I take care of looks and stuff. I just recently saw some fellow students at university recently for the first time, it was like a meetup to get to know one another, and even though I mostly kept quiet I'm pretty sure they could sense that there was something wrong with me.
Anyway, I have extremely low confidence, especially around white people. This is the main issue - it's kinda rooted in my appearance and my ethnicity, I'm Arab and got racially abused during childhood as well as at work. I live in Germany and ever since 2015 happened I get anxious whenever somebody asks me about my ethnical background (my parents are from Syria). When I'm in a social setting with white Germans I always feel like I'm unworthy of their attention, especially around white females, I keep worrying about what they think about me, if I confirm any stupid stereotypes etc. It's basically like the master-slave thing I guess, I cannot function properly around them.
When I was 16 me and my family moved away from the ghetto to a nice suburban area. You can't imagine the anxiety level I felt whenever I happened to meet the neighbors. They were all petite bourgeois white academics who did grill parties in the garden and shit like that, and my parents forced me to go there. I admired these people, but I also feared them (or their judgement to be precise). I was literally too scared to water the garden because I thought that they might see me and think I was doing it the wrong way or whatever. There's so much more I could write but I think you get the idea.

[Anonymous No.18764808]

>>18764752
As has been stated, video games are for children, no exceptions.
You need to work more. You probably think like that because it's probably true. If you still play video games that's a sign you haven't taken life seriously yet. Your subconscious is telling you that you need to make moves. Once you've done that and feel like you've achieved something, those thoughts will lessen and you'll be able to relax again, I bet. And no, I don't want to hear any excuses. Work will set you free, unironically.

[Anonymous No.18764816]

What I really despise about videogames is how they make you feel like you've achieved something when in reality you have done shit.

[Anonymous No.18764821]

>>18764424
Thanks bro. Can't post with the wifi at home, it sucks ass

[Anonymous No.18764827]

Is no one gonna talk about how CVMGENIVS and NEMO are the same dude?

I've only seen a couple of anons realize this. It's fucking obvious.

[Anonymous No.18764828]

After the olympics, i imply cannot jerk off to porn anymore. It just feels so fake and pedestrian.

[Anonymous No.18764855]

Only a mere two more weeks of work and then I've got a week off to go down to Cornwall with the lads and get fucking hammered

[Anonymous No.18764914]

>>18764828
you actually jerk off to that? I admire her beauty but I feel absolutely no sexual desire.

[Anonymous No.18764916]

>>18764914
Yeah i do

[Anonymous No.18764934]

Héctor Tomé

[Anonymous No.18764964]

>>18764828
Hello Robert Crumb, nice to see you here

[Anonymous No.18764968]

An Nth dimensional being that makes itself known to us would essentially be "God". What we presume to exist as "God" likely does not have much interests in human affairs anyways, and so there's no point in it making itself known to us.

I believe in the existence of "God"; but I do not believe that "God" cares about humanity at all.

[Anonymous No.18764982]

>>18764968
what you believe in has limitation. this is not God.

[Anonymous No.18764986]

>>18764968
If Aristotle's prime mover argument is correct, that means that God is currently sustaining all of us into existence and personally making sure each and every one of our actions is possible. Which means that God does have interest in them.

[Anonymous No.18764995]

>>18764828
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIJEr9eP-jE
this one's a classic
enjoy onanympics anon

[Anonymous No.18764997]

Tell me how and I why I’ll never fit in or be accepted in Japan.

[Anonymous No.18765006]

on the highjumpers who decided to share the gold

"how can this be allowed. people call this sportsmanship. abandoning competition is sports-man-ship? I detest this action."

[Anonymous No.18765007]

>>18764995
Winter olympics are also always great

[Anonymous No.18765022]

>>18765007
>boinggg
I just think this is funny anon, it's too advanced for me

[Anonymous No.18765027]

>>18765007
oh my fucking god

[Anonymous No.18765043]

>>18760616
Most people are nowhere near realizing their full potential, myself included. I want that to change. I'm going to go be productive right now (KahnAcademy).

[Anonymous No.18765114]

>>18764997
nips think your nose is funny and will laugh everytime they see you

[Anonymous No.18765117]

>>18765114
:(

Some of them have funny noses too. I h

[Anonymous No.18765161]

>>18762459
>>18762469
>>18762496
Why are you pretending to be me faggot? That post isn't yours and that guy wasn't talking to you. But you are kind of right my situation was no better when I had a job, you just had to go and say it in such a faggy way.

[Anonymous No.18765173]

How did japan manage to market itself so well? Who was behind all this?

[Anonymous No.18765231]

>>18765173
Me

[Anonymous No.18765254]

>>18765173

[Anonymous No.18765256]

Most people here aren't worth the captcha required to answer them

[Anonymous No.18765270]

>>18765256
this so much this thanks god reddit doesn't have any captcha.

[Anonymous No.18765271]

>>18765254
Japan was a satellite state of America immediately after ww2. Their parliament is directly modelled after Europe and even before ww2 they hired Westerners to teach them how to develop.

[Anonymous No.18765273]

>>18765254
Liberia shouldn’t count, but then why doesn’t Korea or Burma present like Japan?

[Anonymous No.18765278]

>>18765254
>*gets conquered by amerimutts*
Oh well, they tried.

[Anonymous No.18765284]

>>18765273
Korea does.

[Anonymous No.18765289]

>>18765254
The american occupation of japan should count as 'colonized by europe'

[Anonymous No.18765297]

>>18765284
No, it really does not.

[Anonymous No.18765303]

>>18765254

[Anonymous No.18765308]

>>18765271
A satellite state? That’s awfully dramatic, don’t you think? Japan’s constitution was influenced by America but has also been largely left alone with the exception of a few military bases. Whatever you could remark about that their economic crash that you pin on American bankers, who shouldn’t be said to be “America” you could also pin on Japanese bankers just as easily.

[Anonymous No.18765310]

>>18765303
And now we know why Japan is so popular.

[Anonymous No.18765317]

>>18765308
The japanese economic miracle and crash were both engineered by our favorite international banking cartel friends. Calling them american is indeed a bit off, but they did come from europe

[Anonymous No.18765320]

>Japan and Taiwan will fall to the chinese in your lifetime

[Anonymous No.18765336]

>>18765303
I keep hearing that there is a problem in Japan with amerimutt soldiers raping their women

[Anonymous No.18765345]

>>18765317
Read princes of the yen. Their own central bankers are just as much to blame. They're more like us in that regard than not like us.

[Anonymous No.18765356]

>>18765345
Their bankers were complicit, but they're not the top of the pyramid. In fact nobody but elites really who know who is at the top but they definitely came from europe, specifically from Amsterdam and London in particular these past few centuries

[Anonymous No.18765369]

>>18765303
>conquers the entire world
>nooooo whites are not superior all races are equal

[Anonymous No.18765373]

>>18765356
Why don't you read the book?

[Anonymous No.18765401]

>>18765320
Don't care about Japan but Taiwan deserves it. All ethnicities should strive to be part of the same nations and all nations should be governed by ethnostates. Everything else is suboptimal, perverted, and corrupted.

[Anonymous No.18765413]

Any recs on heroes, heroism, the hero myth or similar besides Joseph Campbell's books?

[Anonymous No.18765419]

>>18765336
It's mostly rape of human trafficked prostitutes (including children prostitutes), not only in Japan. They call the offspring of American soldiers and Asian women Amerasians.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amerasian

[Anonymous No.18765420]

I was struck by a sudden feeling of having to do a big poo poo. I hastily stood up at my desk, and my wooden chair slid backwards behind me, scraping along the wooden floor making a farty woody scrapy noise that echoed through the exam hall. A student to the left of me turned his head slightly and darted his eyes towards my shoes and quickly back to his test paper. Still staring at my desk, I felt the eyes of the exam adjudicators watching me with suspicion. I turned around and walked through the lane between the rows of desks towards the back of the hall towards the toilets when my bowels began moving, and the feeling of having to do a big smelly poo poo returned. Before I knew it, I had done a big smelly poo poo in my pants.

[Anonymous No.18765439]

The only thing we can ever be sure of about our reality is that it exists to us, and that we can perceive our reality as ourselves. Even if what we perceive as reality isn't real to us, there'd be no way of knowing that "reality" is truly real. So if a completely sentient data entity were to exist, then the digital context in which it exists would be it's "reality". It doesn't matter to the entity that reality isn't really "real", because the entity can only perceive reality as they know it to be, and of which their sense can perceive. Even if the being were to know of their "false reality", and the existence of a "higher" reality in which their reality exists as a simulacrum, there would be no need to move themselves into that version of reality, for the fact that their "reality" is fake can only be true in the context of the reality that the entity perceives. Hence, even if the entity were to move into the other "reality", nothing would have changed as it can still only perceive reality according to itself.

In other words, the only true reality that exists to oneself is the reality that one perceives, and there is no point in chasing the concept of the reality we perceive as being false/a simulation, since that would only be true to reality as we perceive it.

[Anonymous No.18765453]

https://voca.ro/1fidkABUcBZp

:3

[Anonymous No.18765486]

>>18765419
No. It’s just a problem with the military. Rapes occur more frequently around the bases the same way rapes occur more frequently around University frat houses, even in America.

[Anonymous No.18765497]

I felt insecure in his bathroom as I hit that pipe for the first time. A piece of chore-boy steel wool stuffed in a straight glass pipe, the wool was there to collect and heat the oils. As I looked at the comically designed piece of dogshit among pieces of broken glass and white-boy body hair on the top of the toilet, I started to feel quite silly. But silliness wasn’t in my mind then, only getting fucked up, “punched in the chest with it” as my friend called it. I’d only used cocaine twice in high school, now in my late twenties I’d wondered if the high would too intense. But it was just right — as I inhaled I felt that same cokey taste I felt as an adolescent, I was absolutely smacked in the chin with it with it as I inhaled and I cuddy couldn’t help but give guttural giggles at the body tremors I had started to felt. I walked out proud, like a new man. His plug was standing there with an eager, boyish look on his face that betrayed the tattoed gruff exterior he presented. I nodded, “It’s good.” He began to laugh and his baby moms seemed pleased too. “I told you those Kensington niggas don’t be fuckin’ around!” he told me.

[Anonymous No.18765498]

Why can’t I just get control of myself?

[Anonymous No.18765540]

had dental anxiety all my life from most of my teeth getting drilled by a crooked dentist as a kid. just discovered kyoto university is premiering a treatment that can completely regrow damaged or lost teeth. hopefully it will be available within 10 years and i should have a stash of money saved to pay for it. i feel so hopeful and happy now. apparently it has worked perfectly in both mice and ferrets so far.

i finally have a reason to bother with wageslaving.

[Anonymous No.18765628]

I am paralyzed by indecision.

[Anonymous No.18765934]

The thought passes through my mind that the touch of somebody is something that I miss; something that I haven't had for approximately, something close to 8 months. Just listening to some tunes right now I just picture my hands going through some thighs as some long black hairs strike my nostrils - pure bliss.

In a red room while the tunes play, a lonely man on a Sunday night is dreaming of drops of sweat only evaporating do to friction.

[Anonymous No.18766056]

>>18765628
There will be time, there will be time....

[Anonymous No.18766060]

It's all a house of cards. Anything can crumble.

[Anonymous No.18766080]

My therapist gives me weird looks when I talk about the occult.

[Anonymous No.18766214]

>>18762835
I've been hanging out in these threads for a while. Still writin' and what not. I enjoy writing and talking about it but they weren't happy when I posted, and I can only post at home right now so I participate a lot less anyway.
Artists are sensitive, etc etc. I do post in the writer general when I see other writers or cute anime stuff. I want a happy aura. Too much gloom is my doom and yes I realize the irony since I write primarily about death.
Yeah I'm weird.

[Anonymous No.18766223]

my penis is now bent at a perfect 90 degree angle when erect and i'm too embarrassed to talk to a doctor (or anyone, really) about it. i don't know what to do

[Anonymous No.18766257]

>>18766223
Find a woman with a 90 degree vaginal canal. Art thou an idiot?

[Anonymous No.18766261]

>>18764916
How? It's an athlete at work, not really sexual.

[Anonymous No.18766278]

>>18766261
strength can be sexual

[Anonymous No.18766286]

>>18766223
What do you mean 'now'? Have you been moulding it into that position?

[Anonymous No.18766291]

>>18760616
I'm a bitter drunk, I am a nightmare person and rapist. Tomorrow I start a private-sector writing job, and yet all I wish for is to die.

[Anonymous No.18766319]

sitting on bed idk what to do i should sleep soon but im also waiting for my book to arrive on tuesday currently going to read some japanese literaure, i plan on reading kokoro by natsume soseki. just been playing oldschool runescape past couple of days because i have been waiting for this book to arrive, im close to 99 strength on my ags pure currently sitting at 95.

[Anonymous No.18766321]

I think one more drink won't kill me. Fuck tomorrow, today, I just wanna get drunk.

[Anonymous No.18766332]

>>18766319
>kokoro by natsume soseki
Love that book

[Anonymous No.18766336]

One of my friends occasionally still brings up things I said several years back that still make them seethe to this day, but I barely remember saying anything brought up. I've probably done the same with other people, having something they said that was innocuous live rent free in my head for a week, but it's annoying to be on the receiving end of this.

[Anonymous No.18766365]

>>18760616
I’ve realized my interest in Japanese culture is misguided, and is unnatural for me. While an appreciation for every culture and it’s uniqueness is fine, I would never be accepted there, and would always be an outsider no matter how hard I worked to integrate myself. Any interest beyond a basic appreciation is therefore wasted, as it would never benefit me.

[Anonymous No.18766394]

I am new at /lit/ as i came from /r9k/ to /fit/ and /fa/ now i'm here

Came here with the full intent to fix my receeding attentionspan as it has deteriorated due to my excess internet use mindlessly scrolling down social media. There has come to a point where if i read half a paragraph my mind drifts off on my own thoughts forgetting and not understanding anything i've visually consumed and having in person conversation makes me dissasociate and disconnect with anything and everythin around me.

I'm slowly getting better and have managed to widen my vocabulary through reading novels. I'm only at my first 100page and i still sometimes drift in my own thoughts again without the use of coffee
Ill keep pushing thru tho :^)

[Anonymous No.18766399]

>>18760616
I’ve been fooling around with a 17 year old girl. I’m going to be 33 soon. I need to get my life together

[Anonymous No.18766418]

>>18766394
The more fun you have with something the less your mind will wander. Took me a while too, smartphones have cursed us all.

[Anonymous No.18766420]

>>18766399
12+ is fine I think.HHAAY

[Anonymous No.18766446]

I feel entirely useless, worthless, and helpless

[Anonymous No.18766521]

Writing a CV is tougher than I thought. I feel intimidated by others who've done god knows what during their bachelors and masters to fill up their cv while I barely have much to show for it.

[Anonymous No.18766539]

Write what's on your hecking mind.

[Anonymous No.18766545]

>>18766539
Hell no!

[Anonymous No.18766568]

>>18766521
iktfb, i also have massive time gap since last job.

[Anonymous No.18766619]

started reading stoner, hope its good.
So many books to read lmao

[Anonymous No.18766719]

I'm gay and I don't like it.

[Anonymous No.18766739]

>>18766365
>would never be accepted there, and would always be an outsider no matter how hard I worked to integrate myself
I don’t think that’s true. In fact, I met someone once who would seem to suggest that it’s not but to your point, these things are never black and white.

[Tripcode Tester !!kGW3mvg3DSW No.18766740]

This is a post to test tripcodes.

[Trippy !!kGW3mvg3DSW No.18766745]

This is also a post to test tripcodes.

[Anonymous No.18766750]

My brother has been an undergraduate for his entire adult life. He has no work experience and he’s going to be 30 soon. I don’t actually care that he has no work experience and I don’t even believe what he does for work matters so much, but I do worry about him. I can’t even see him holding a job let alone a job that necessitated a degree.

[Anonymous No.18766764]

>>18766539
You've convinced me.

I came out of a very deep depression recently, was gone for nearly 4 years. Only recently have my passions, my feelings returned to me. Started reading again, started light and "with the Greeks."

"Stories of Love and Adventure" reawakened a lot of memories, a lot of feelings I once had. Can't remember the last time I felt something so beautiful, so sweet. I can only hope that when love comes to me again I won't squander it.

[࿇ C Œ M G E N V S ࿇ KNDY3cHnRY No.18766786]

This is my final post testing tripcodes.

[Anonymous No.18766798]

>>18766521
>not forging documents
ngmi

[Anonymous No.18766813]

>>18766365
Just turn your country into japan
That's what I'll do

[Anonymous No.18766853]

i havent posted here in months but i just typed “poop” and found out i’m no longer rangebanned. haha! poop!

[Anonymous No.18766864]

>>18766539
I am reading the Master and the Margarita. Chapter two was too deep for me.

[Anonymous No.18766890]

>Be tired all day
>2am rolls around and I'm wide awake

[Anonymous No.18767251]

I'm tired of having to face on a daily basis how far I've fallen, or worse, how low I always was

I shouldn't be trying shit like competing with others or winning approval. I'm never going to get it. I'm just going to get hurt

[Anonymous No.18767255]

>>18767251
That is a good thing, now you have to figure out what is wrong with all this. Don't sink on that shit.

[Anonymous No.18767268]

>>18767255
The only consistent thread in all my problems is me. I was some shitheaded little kid who grew up the smartest fish in the tiniest pond. In the 10 years since I graduated high school, I haven't learned how to accept otherwise because being the smart one is the only way I can assign any value to myself as a person

[Anonymous No.18767298]

>>18767268
Yes, but those things are somewhat psychological. Considering what you have told me until now, I have been somewhat in the same situation. Grew up with everyone telling me how smart I were (and that was a great thing, even if I'm not exactly good at everything or anything extraordinary on what I'm good), then as I got through school I couldn't write anything, I had to put a lot of effort and the results were often disappointing, and college entrance exams in my country require that you write a small essay, so I was basically fucked, tried a lot of times, but always knowing that I wouldn't get past the essay and even if somehow I managed to get in, I wouldn't be able to write in uni and wouldn't graduate anyway. I was into this thing for 10 years or something, at the end I felt like killing myself. Somehow I ended up getting help, I got a bit better, got into a Physics course (even with a terrible essay grade, which prevented me from getting into a /lit/ course that I wanted). Then ended up dropping out of the course because of unrelated reasons, and got into computer science. Might drop out it again, because of other reasons too. Maybe I'm going to psychology or med school, I'm thinking if I'm going to leave my current course. And I finished school in 2005, anon.

My point is to not give up and seek help. A good deal of this whole thing taking this long is that I was somewhat scared of people and that this smart thing can both help and hinder you. Don't let it hinder you, ask for help even and most people won't think that you are stupid or anything. You will probably figure things out eventually, but get help, and if people tell you that you are smart, you are definitely not dumb, anon. People usually tell others that they are dumb af. Anyway, don't give in and keep up with whatever you are supposed to be doing.

[Anonymous No.18767301]

>>18767298
Oh, and I forgot to add that I was so fucking desperate because of this writing thing when I got into the Physics course. That I ended up asking for help of one of the professors, he helped me out a lot, but I also discovered that I had some weird trauma and I invented some ways of dealing with it., but I had to figure out those things by myself. Ask for help, anon. talk about it with a psychologist or a teacher.

[Anonymous No.18767309]

>>18767301
In the sense that you might feel better after reading this. But you probably got a really big problem, and it is probably not unsolvable. You can probably figure it out by yourself, took me 3 years to say that I wasn't really screwed by it. And it has been 6 years and I'm still not completely fine. But consider that what I did in those 3 years would probably be the equivalent of 3 months of psychotherapy, maybe even less.

[Anonymous No.18767317]

>>18767298
>>18767301
>>18767309


anon, you want to know the fucked up part about all this? I went through the EXACT same thing you went through when I was in college, literally down to starting in the physics department and switching to comp sci while constantly suicidal. At the end of it I thought I came out stronger, but now I realize that I didn't actually learn anything from the experience, I just found myself in another another small pond where people convinced me to believe my own hype.

I never really learned to value myself by any metric besides my capabilities, and I don't think I ever will

[Anonymous No.18767365]

>>18767317
No, anon, there is something wrong. Smart people don't really exist. People told me that I am a smart person, but that is basically because I read things and steal other people's ideas. You figure it out what is wrong with you, seek a psychologist that they can definitely help you out. I'm not a pro, but you are probably depressed and also have self-image issues. Definitely check that out before it gets worse.

[Anonymous No.18767369]

>>18760879
Do you take pride in being a trend-following faggot?

[Anonymous No.18767377]

>>18767268
>>18767298
>>18767317
Fuck. That is rough anons. Can relate, I have some daddy issues related to seeking the approval of my older peers, probably developed when I tried to make my father happy because otherwise he would throw a fit. I developed a kind of slave mentality, which helped me endure college, but since having graduated, I became an absolutely fuck up guy. Which is okay. I am probably stuck in some weird shit. But just this year I realized it is not my task to fix my family. I would recommend taking teraphy with a jungian analyst, if you have access to one. That is the route I will take, once I get a job and get my first paycheck.

[Anonymous No.18767409]

HAND ME THE GLOCK PLEASE

[Anonymous No.18767449]

>>18764816
Meanwhile blood has pooled in your ass and legs, your vision has narrowed, and you’ve been totally inert except for minor finger movements. Physiologically you might as well have been hypnotized. I quit video games 5 years ago and it’s been amazing. Also I started getting embarrassed by it. I realized nobody I admire plays video games, and everyone I know that regularly plays video games are people whose lifestyles generally suck. I think i noticed it as a status thing, and I associated vg with losers, being poor, and being unambiguous (I was right)

I also started making more friends that have hobbies that are actually interesting and good for you

[Anonymous No.18767453]

>>18767449
>I quit video games 5 years ago and it’s been amazing.
I quit video games 5 years ago and every other time-wasting vice and I've never felt worse

[Anonymous No.18767497]

>>18767449
it's certainly unhealthy, but it's one of the things i find fun. It's difficult for me to find things that are more engaging then video games

[Anonymous No.18767509]

>>18767497
>It's difficult for me to find things that are more engaging then video games
I only played vidya out of plain addiction for a couple years. I played this online thing, it was a habit. I didn't enjoy it or find it engaging and I was aware of it, but I needed it to take my mind off things. Except it was stressful and I didn't like it.
Then over the years I tried playing videogames again "for fun" and I just couldn't. I have no idea how anyone can like playing videogames. It's just pushing buttons. I would like games with a story but they're so badly written and geared to kids or adult children, and in the middle of dialogue or story there's more pointless button pushing.

[Anonymous No.18767593]

>>18765007
watched this webm like 10 times before noticing she's from my country

[Anonymous No.18767627]

>>18761935
you talk like a retard and your shits all retarded.
You reek of newfaggism and likely don't even use the image boards that are exactly what you want out of chans since you are a newfag tourist

[Anonymous No.18767631]

>>18767593
Can you hook me up

[Anonymous No.18767635]

>>18767627
dilate

[Anonymous No.18767664]

>>18767631
you know what the funny thing is? she's really cute, but there are so, so many women here that look like that. I think we have the highest concentration of attractive women, along with some Balkan countries. I didn't realize this growing up, but when you compare the general populations, Western women are pretty fucking ugly

[Anonymous No.18767682]

>>18767509
>It's just pushing buttons.
you can reduce anything down to a ridiculous statement like this, oh it's a book it's just reading words for example.
What hobbies did you pick up anon, and how are they any less of a surrogate activity?

[Anonymous No.18767728]

>>18767682
>you can reduce anything down to a ridiculous statement like this, oh it's a book it's just reading words
nah I wasn't being reductionist, story-based videogames (I was talking about those) have the dullest fucking gameplay imaginable
say combat, is always the same shit, pressing buttons with good timing
if you strip down the average videogame to the bare bones of what the user does and what happens in the game, it's really that you press a button with good timing and you land a hit or whatever
actually the worst part is that if you use another method for gameplay the game becomes incredibly fucking dull, see turn-based JRPGs where it's just gringing mindlessly
a book isn't just "reading words" you are interpreting shit and your brain is switched on
vast majority of videogame gameplay is completely braindead
there are highly technical videogames of course but even those are like 90% muscle memory and you play them in this state of mechanical trance. people tend to elevate videogames over say movies because you participate to the activity but the truth is that watching a movie (assuming you're really watching it and the movie isn't shit) takes a lot more engagement and brain activity than playing vidya
and then again, when you finish the gameplay bit and get to a story-advancing part they have for the most part such a fucking awful writing

[Anonymous No.18767744]

>>18767728
video games aren't about story they're about game-play

[Anonymous No.18767798]

>>18767728
What hobbies did you pick up anon, and how are they any less of a surrogate activity?

[Anonymous No.18767807]

i'm learning scripting but struggling with Python beginner material.

[Anonymous No.18767838]

Is there a chemical imbalance within my brain? It feels like there's an untapped reservoir of energy that pops up only very rarely, and when it does, it manages to impress even my jaded self.
It seems as if I have to go fracking to dig up this reservoir and unleash the wellspring of action, but I can't seem to strike at the right point to achieve meaningful momentum.

[Anonymous No.18767850]

Shaolin shaking for the sake of his soul.

[Anonymous No.18767899]

>>18767682
Cops video games are retarded

[Anonymous No.18767907]

>>18767744
>video games aren't about story they're about game-play
you're not wrong, it's probably because I hate gameplay that I try to look for a story

[Anonymous No.18767962]

I was reading about early psychological development and the more you think about what a small child really is, the weirder it gets, especially when you consider an intelligence for which you still appear as a small child. These tiny beings who cannot really understand anything but have vague proto concepts and uncontrolled emotions and just imitate everything they see adults do. Then there is that sort of phase change around age 5 where you become self aware and aware of other minds, that is really the single biggest mental development in human life, we never undergo another change so radical, we just kind of gain more control and sophistication. The small child is literally totally incapable of comprehending self and other minds, but they are conscious beings nonetheless. There could be so many mental developments for which we are in the small child stage of being unable even to conceive of what they would be. Imagine then being a God and trying to explain to small children why they have to do various things, they do not understand and they become angry and rebellious and so on. Irl of course parents just force their children to do necessary things they don't want to like brush their teeth or whatever, and the child senses that the parent loves and cares for them, but in analogy to adults and God nobody is forced and nobody can be sure God loves them or even exists, unless we take the entire world itself as God forcing us to do things and everything good as the love that he shows us, and we will not understand what he is doing until we undergo another 'phase change' of mental development like that of the child gaining self awareness, presumably at death.

I am not a believer in god anyway, I was just thinking about this analogy since God is called the father and it is emphasized that his ways are mysterious and beyond our comprehension. I guess the psychoanalysts say that the whole thing is just a projection of desire for the parent figure we had when we were children, but the idea of another phase change does intrigue me. I know this is not an original concept but it feels like maybe the only theodicy that really works, even if it's kind of a copout since the explanation is just 'you cant explain it' lol.

[Anonymous No.18768005]

I am lonely and sexually frustrated. I also go through cycles of self-aggrandization and self-hatred. And I waste too much of my time on here.

[Anonymous No.18768020]

I feel so numb and empty, I am dead inside.

[Anonymous No.18768036]

>>18767962
to me, the explanation *must* be that we can't explain it, as we are fundamentally limited beings and our greatest achievement, to my mind, is arriving at this realization. which is what is meant by "I know that I know nothing"

[Anonymous No.18768078]

>>18768005
lift

[Anonymous No.18768082]

>feel drowsy in the afternoon
>take a short nap
>wake up feeling worse
What the fuck

[Anonymous No.18768090]

>>18768082
It's the sleep that's fucking you up. You sleep too much. Abuse amphetamines.

[Anonymous No.18768095]

>>18768036
It does seem that way. Although if you start thinking about free will(another basically incomprehensible concept but let's assume it does exist) you can sort invent ways in which all evil and suffering that occurs is the result of beings making free choices, whether just humans or if you invoke demons doing stuff too.

[Anonymous No.18768106]

>>18768078
I do, but it changes nothing.

[Anonymous No.18768122]

>>18768106
don't masturbate. pavlovian condition yourself in a way that masturbation elicits a sense of impending doom. you will be testmaxxed and in your desperation to satisfy your sexual urges you will actually manage to score

[Anonymous No.18768130]

>>18768122
I have not masturbated in more than 5 or 6 months. Which is why I'm frustrated.

[Anonymous No.18768249]

>>18768130
go talk to women then

[soursore !!5HEGfvI0zIR No.18768273]

Testing to see if I am banned.

[Anonymous No.18768279]

>>18768122
It is interesting that males are this psychotic about masturbation when females can do it every day without it ruining their personal wellbeing, also you can cum 20 times in a row and shit. The male body is a mystery.

[Anonymous No.18768280]

>>18768090
I ain't taking adhd meds. I just played a game of Tekken, got mad and it woke me up.

[Anonymous No.18768284]

>>18768279
>cum 20 times in a row
(I mean when you are a female obviously)

[Anonymous No.18768288]

>>18768095
indeed it is incomprehensible, and it's difficult to find any way to rationalize free will, and how it would be possible in a universe that appears to be functioning deterministically. of course that's also just a human limitation, regardless of which side you want to argue for. and arguing in favor of hard determinism is inherently absurd anyway, for reasons which I'd hope need no explanation.
anyway, your post was interesting, I've been thinking along those lines a lot lately.

[Anonymous No.18768296]

>>18768249
Why would I talk to them? You think a woman would magically solve all my problems?
>>18768279
Women generally just coast through life, while every aspect of life is a hardship and challenge for men.

[Anonymous No.18768300]

>>18768296
it would certainly solve your sexual frustration you fuckin loser

[Anonymous No.18768318]

>>18768300
I don't intend to "solve my sexual frustration" until marriage, but I don't have the financial means for that as of now.

[Anonymous No.18768328]

>>18768288
I dont think hard determinism is absurd. That's not to say I'm 100% on it, just that I don't think it is an incoherent model. That is just about my least favorite topic to discuss though and I dont think anyone ever changes their minds about it. I agree in any case that there is room for free will if we just put a little question mark next to it, which we also have to do with things like consciousness or logical necessity anyway so it's not a big deal.

[Anonymous No.18768332]

>>18768288
>how it would be possible in a universe that appears to be functioning deterministically.
The universe doesn't function deterministically. You have to factor chaos into your metaphysics. The way events unfold in the universe is an interplay of determinism and chaos.

[Anonymous No.18768344]

>>18768332
Chaos can just be hidden causally determined factors

[Anonymous No.18768358]

>>18768344
>Chaos can just be hidden causally determined factors
For as long as causation is unpredictable we speak of chaos and not determinism. The idea of a Laplace's demon has been scientifically refuted by quantum mechanics.

[Anonymous No.18768380]

>>18768328
>I dont think hard determinism is absurd
I didn't say it's absurd, I said arguing for it is an absurd act. if you think about it you'll probably see what I mean.

>>18768332
maybe. but what we call chaos, or what we call randomness, is just as likely order beyond our comprehension. another area where we meet the limits of our cognition and pattern recognition

[Anonymous No.18768388]

>>18768358
Qm is just another model, it's not absolute reality and some new model might one day find hidden causal factors. The point is that there is no logical issue with determinism

[Anonymous No.18768398]

>>18768380
I dont see why arguing for it is absurd at all, in that case I would just be a system that is analyzing itself and seeing its own determined nature, compelled to Express this to you by whatever other causal factors make us like to argue and speculate. There is really no inconsistency

[Anonymous No.18768407]

>>18768398
that is what I'd consider to be absurd

[Anonymous No.18768418]

>>18768407
Fair enough.

[Anonymous No.18768563]

One of the lousiest parts of getting older is that the redundant aspect of bodily self-maintenance, brushing teeth and so on, gets more and more repetitive as one's flesh prison gradually decays. In youth, one does these acts of self maintenance to polish and improve the body, whereas after a certain point, the goal is to slow its inevitable disintegration. You start to get on the wrong side of entropy where the order is scattering like billions of tiny billiard proteinic billiard balls rather than assembling into a stable structure.

[Anonymous No.18768572]

>>18768563
like billions of tiny billiard proteinic billiard balls
My proofreading and brain needs self-maintenance too.

[Anonymous No.18768606]

got a lump in my armpit. had it about 10 days at least. I think it is shrinking though, very slowly. it was sore, it isn't really sore anymore. and it isn't that big. I don't really think it is anything, I haven't booked any appointments or anything, but I'd say it's on my mind.

Other than that I've talked a lot about God today and I've worked out although I wasn't really in the mood and I didn't go too hard.
>inb4 that's when you go harder
well I didn't today. Now I don't really know what to do with the rest of the day. Rewatching Bojack. Shitposting. There isn't really much to do.

[Anonymous No.18768616]

good morning boys

[Anonymous No.18768620]

>>18768616
how do

[Anonymous No.18768656]

>>18761694
Wew you've never really spent any time on or moderating such a forum have you? I can't even begin to imagine a worse conversational setting than a religiously-oriented forum with persistent poster identities. Maybe the only thing worse would be a political forum, but since religion allows for pure conjecture it has even less mooring than political discussion. You'll get the worst of both worlds, garbage tier holier than thou oneupsmanship AND a terminally-ill forum culture that always ends with imitation and grift after the active interested users are driven off.

[Anonymous No.18768663]

>>18768606
if you're thinking tumor, the simple rule of thumb is that if it hurts, it's benign, not a big deal and will probably go away by itself. if you can't feel it, get it checked out.
I don't know to what extent this holds up, it's what I've been taught anyway

[Anonymous No.18768672]

is there a website for rEtArDiFyInG text? would be useful for converting longer paragraphs for funposting purposes

[Anonymous No.18768688]

>>18768663
it was sore but now it isn't. but I think it is shrinking, I'll give it a day or two and see how it develops. there's a good public helpline in my country, I could just call and ask what they think

[Anonymous No.18768694]

Maybe I should join the US Military

[Anonymous No.18768751]

>>18768606
>Rewatching Bojack
Diane truly sucks ass.

[Anonymous No.18768795]

>>18768694
hope you have fun there, anon.
https://streamable.com/c14huo

[Anonymous No.18768842]

>>18767497
I use vidya basically as something to decompress from work. Games that can be played in low stress half-hour sessions work wonders for me.

[Anonymous No.18768884]

>>18768842
>I-it's a stress relief method!
Coooopeeeeriiiinoooooo :)

[Anonymous No.18768896]

>>18768884
Youre on 4chan you have no ground to criticize him playing a half hour of video games after work

[Anonymous No.18768952]

>>18768751
I mean it's sort of cool that her arc ends with the realization that actually she's chronically depressed, probably because of her upbringing, and that that's why she sucks. I don't know if the audience is supposed to think that she sucks, but either way she has a major change in the latter part of her arc that has to throw a lot of "you go girl"-viewers off

[Anonymous No.18768993]

"Former" addicts are always pathetic. The recently fit guy who goes into a frenzy after watching someone drinking a cup of soda because he used to be a sad pathethic sack of shit who consumed soda in much larger quantities. The nerd who now hates sex as a whole because he used to watch weird japanese and tranny porn. The born again christian who used to be the biggest shithead and now can't stop lecturing everyone.
They put their lack of self-control for everyone to see and expect you, the one who was strong enough to never fall into degenerate shit, to learn from them. I don't have anything to learn from you. You're the one trying your hardest to be like me.

[Anonymous No.18769004]

>>18768993
COPE

[Anonymous No.18769029]

>started an antidepressant
>felt some emotions come back a little on day 1
>day 2 and 3, feel nothing again

[Anonymous No.18769041]

あなたがこの世に生まれなければ
妬みなんて痛みなんて
知らずに済んだ

[Anonymous No.18769047]

>>18761694
I don't see eye-to-eye. It's my love for Christianity which makes me frequent the most degenerate rubbish-bins of the internet. I feel like I belong here and my eye just bounces off pornography, if I chance encounter it, so it doesn't feel like an occasion of sin. I feel like, If I really want to reach sainthood, I'll only ever find company in the shadow of a brothel or the pits of some imageboard. Like when the desert fathers retreated to the desert and their only company were schizo-demons shitposting in their ears or fellow hermits who were probably pederasts in their former palace-lives. I regret the desensitization, but I can't go back to the innocence of childhood, and hence I'm too corrupt to look eye-to-eye with members of society, too ashamed to stand in the presence of children and their families, too ashamed to find a place among the trees and wildflowers--so therefore, even if I renounced every single sin and every vice, took out every nail on the plank, the holes are still there, so I have to retreat to the lifeless desert and enjoy company with the perverse. It's like how St. Francis, finding the Truth about the beauty of creation and the universe and humanity, retreated to a mountain cave and buried his face in the snow. My withdrawal is not a cynical one. Did not St. Therese say she would like to be in hell so that at least one person there praises the Lord?

[Anonymous No.18769244]

>have to apply for jobs
>Feel no motivation, no excitement, no confidence, no positive emotions whatsoever, just fear and dread
>havent enjoyed interacting with people in years
>no longer have any ambitions or hope for the future, but nonetheless feel like im wasting my life.
>Used to dream about marrying and having kids but now i cant imagine ever getting a relationship to begin with
Is this just me getting older or is this abnormal? And if so, how can i become the person i once was again?

[Anonymous No.18769272]

>>18769244
It's becoming more the norm, but it shouldn't be. I had the same exact cycle happening for me in my mid 20's and getting a break on landing a job I liked after a billion applications turned it around for me....that was about 10 years ago and it really started me back. Sometimes you just need a break, I know it's a boomer thing to say but if I had to go back I'd tell myself to pick out something that brings you some happiness...even if it's just a little bit and concentrate on it. If you have something to fall back on things that would devastate you don't hit quite as hard.

[Anonymous No.18769400]

>>18769244
you could've just said you're an otaku neet without making me read all that greentext. No you're clearly not the only one, in every wwoym thread there's at least 10 of you.

[Anonymous No.18769403]

>>18769400
>otaku
i fucking hate anime, dont compare me to that filth

[Anonymous No.18769510]

>>18769047
No one gives a fuck

[Anonymous No.18769598]

>>18768896
>Youre on 4chan you have no ground to criticize him playing a half hour of video games after work
BRO, I'm only on this site to collect data for my groundbreaking semi-literary work about the thoughts and ideas of 21st century western youth. It will be about tennis and airplanes. You'll see when the shit comes out in two years. Problem?

[Anonymous No.18769722]

>>18769047
>/wwoym/ thread theme

[Anonymous No.18769733]

>>18769598
>*[lack of] thoughts and ideas of [zoomers]

[Anonymous No.18769940]

What's the book equivalent of this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1J6TFHCevg

[Anonymous No.18770045]

I usually don't pay much attention to physical health, but brain wave activity is very interesting. At any given moment each wave kind is active in certain parts of our brain: Delta, Theta, Alpha, Beta, Gamma, and it helps regulate the activity or lack thereof (passivity) of mental functions.
One can physically describe many mental disorders by brain waves, their relationships with one another and with external forces outside the self. This is not the whole answer obviously, but only one way of describing or understanding something. What bothers me is that people nowadays have a reductionist tendency, and once they learn about something, say brain waves, they will just to the conclusion that that is all there is, or that one can solve all of their problems by focusing on this area of study and this alone.

[Anonymous No.18770068]

Ethics suffuses life, any exposition of an Ethical system is itself an ethical act. We are too close to Life to judge it, we are within it and just like a camera cannot photograph itself, we can't get the full picture, language can't represent language, the trancendent intentionality of apperances can't represent its own apperance. The only choice is to be silent and to simply Live rather than try to represent and be aware that what is most secret and secure that renders us alive can never be uncovered.

[Anonymous No.18770079]

What is the postmodern explanation of preference? If everyone is just a product of their surroundings and there's no such thing as "essence" or an atomized individual, then how can people born into uniform environments turn out different, and have different preferences, rather than perfectly copying what they see? Why would anyone choose to NOT copy their environment and why would people turn asocial?

[Anonymous No.18770083]

Feeling pretty relaxed after deleting thousands of shameful image reactions.

[Anonymous No.18770088]

People these days can be so strange. I mean, it’s always been like that but really, it can catch you off guard like a trap door filled with spikes. I wish people were honest about their opinions. I don’t like people who disguise themselves to please you, it just prolongs the awful discovery of their secrets. Don’t change for me, just avoid me and maybe think I’m cute from a distance, but don’t come into my life knowing how I am, knowing how you are, then trying to force a connection that obviously shouldn’t be. I can’t be giving up time and emotions like that, I have to preserve my already aching spirit. I could have been spending time getting to know myself instead of a snake’s mouth before it bites me. Lesson learned I guess.

[Anonymous No.18770113]

>>18770079
No enviorment is perfectly uniform and small changes in conditions can cause major divergence.

[Anonymous No.18770227]

When did "conservatism" become so castrated and pathetic
>I'm worried about Islam because I think it might be BAD FOR WOMENS' RIGHTS! PLEASE WON'T YOU THINK OF THE WOMENS' RIGHTS!!???
>THIS IS SO EDGY AND RADICAL BY THE WAY AND IT COULD END MY CAREER!!
What is he even trying to conserve other than the liberal order
https://youtu.be/yKhAh_qfO64

[Anonymous No.18770281]

seen a shrink a few times. I told her about what I know/believe about religious metaphysics. I can't tell if she thinks I'm a schizo or not. When I left she told me "You did well, you didn't contradict yourself." I don't know by what standard any of that is supposed to have been evaluated or why.

[Anonymous No.18770285]

>quit antidepressants
>feel happier. doing and finishing a lot of work

[Anonymous No.18770384]

>>18770227
>When did "conservatism" become so castrated and pathetic
they bowed their knees to the neoliberal world order with reagan and thatcher because the ruling class back then had somewhat conservative social values. But those social values have changed to liberal and now these midwits just can't help themselves. They literally cannot cope with the fact that the same market which helped them stay in power before are now catering to "BLM emily she/they" libshits because it's more profitable. That's why there's no political program for conservatism to speak of anymore, all they can do is keep playing the culture war game until that too will lose its effect completely. The republicans are now divided between maga and christcucks, dems are 100% safe to secure the next couple of elections if that continues. Abstract values like "responsibility" as Peterson loves to advertise mean nothing to maga idiots who'd rather spend their time plotting conspiracies in their telegram groups instead of cleaning their room. Conservatives screwed themselves up and they cope by blaming le evil commies, the ol' reliable red scare card just like during the cold war.

[Anonymous No.18770400]

>>18770384
Peterson is a milquetoast cuck who never goes into edgy territory that might be bad for his shekel account. He is a grifter.

[Anonymous No.18770436]

>>18770227
>When did "conservatism" become so castrated and pathetic

when you realize conservatism is just liberalism minus 30 years. It's always a gradual walk to the left, and conservatism simply exists to prevent us from slingshotting there.

[Anonymous No.18770470]

>>18770384
>elections
Lmao

[Anonymous No.18770484]

New thread
>>18760616
New thread
>>18760616
New thread
>>18760616
New thread
>>18760616

[Anonymous No.18770487]

>>18770470
What's funny?

[Anonymous No.18770489]

>>18770484
No,

[Anonymous No.18770491]

>>18770227
That's not conservatism retard.

[Anonymous No.18770498]

>>18770491
Is neoconservative not conservatism?

[Anonymous No.18770512]

I wanna become the dictator of a first world country but I don't think I have the speech skills to come anywhere close to having people begging me to suspend constitution. Besides, I feel like the political divide is too wide so whichever political aisle I choose to go with will have half the country calling me either "literally Hitler" or "literally Stalin."

[Anonymous No.18770516]

>>18770512
Nothing wrong with Stalin.

[Anonymous No.18770520]

>>18770498
If you knew what conservatism was you'd laugh at prepending "neo-" to it.

[Anonymous No.18770528]

>>18770520
I mean, there's neoliberal and that's liberal.

[Anonymous No.18770537]

>>18770528
You should read a book one day. Start with Burke.

[Anonymous No.18770540]

New thread
>>18770538

[Anonymous No.18770542]

>>18770516
Well, Stalin still has statues of himself around Russia and still has people under his mind control as a deified ruler. Hitler is a grand failure in that regard, so I suppose becoming "literally Stalin" is much more preferable. I'm just conflating because that's what the political right will call you if you're trying to become a dictator from the left side of politics.

[Anonymous No.18770543]

>>18770537
>Burke
Literally who?

[Anonymous No.18770554]

>>18770543
Go back to /pol/ subhuman

[Anonymous No.18771280]

>>18760616
I'm realizing that I'm just flat out not smart enough for the NYC grind companies but kinda enjoying the perks and just cruising as I daily make sizeable mistakes.

[Anonymous No.18772013]

>>18770528
>there's neoliberal and that's liberal.
Lower taxes, irradiation of social services, smaller government, deregulation. When was the last time you heard a liberal advocating neoliberalism in America? It's strictly the conservative position - that's how twisted our politics has become.